Poor punctuation & profanity: The first four years

I just got an email from this chick who’s asking bloggers to share what it was like the first time they ever posted on their blog so I went to look and see what other people were saying about their first posts and it was all sort of profound and introspective stuff.  So then I went back to look up the very first post *I* ever wrote on this blog.  This is it, in its entirety:

I am nothing if not consistent.

118 replies. read them below or add one

  1. One of the best posts I’ve ever read.

    Like

    Sherry Carr-Smith recently posted Responsibility Is Hot.

  2. You’re right – it even makes insults funnier and more fulfilling.

    without curse words: You suck.
    with curse words: Asshole, you suck shit.

    Like

  3. Heck when your dog died last year you should have just linked to your first post!

    Like

    Britta recently posted Quiznos Small Sub Coupon!.

  4. Not my first post, but one of the first ones was a photo for one of those weekly photo memes. I posted the photo, posted the link to the meme and then got in the shower. While in there it suddenly dawned on me that actual people were going to be coming and looking at my website and my photo. I had a panic attack. It’s funny to think back on that now.

    Like

    photine recently posted Armand Bayou.

  5. If they were really honest, they’d say “my first blog post was shitty.” But that would be funny, since cursing is involved. You were clearly right all along.

    Like

  6. That’s fucking brilliant.

    Like

  7. All I keep seeing is “Mommy Wants Vodka” on the right… here on your blog. So glad you wrote that first post and all the others that followed.

    Like

    Marisa @ I failed math. recently posted THIS makes me sad.

  8. What was the dog’s name? Oh the intrigue!

    Like

    mrtl recently posted Swan Lake May 2- 2009.

  9. I just ate a sandwich.

    I just ate a shit sandwich.

    Proved.

    Like

    Backpacking Dad recently posted The Evolution of the Disney Prince.

  10. My 19-year-old thinks she’s pregnant.

    My fucking 19-year-old thinks she’s pregnant.

    My 19-year-old thinks she is fucking pregnant. Okay, a bit funnier.

    Like

  11. Simple truths are the most profound truths. Wait, simple truths are the most fucking profound truths. You’re right!

    Like

  12. Curse words are just adjectives. Really great, meaningful, fulfilling adjectives. Or possibly adverbs as in: My day was shittingly awful.

    Like

    Mary recently posted Wine Bell.

  13. I wrote a horrific post about sneaking onto my old elementary school playground for a smoke, and getting chased off by a skunk. Again, nothing much has changed. Your’s is way more awesome.

    Like

    K recently posted Wine drunk- the classiest of the drunks.

  14. I don’t agree.

    “I killed your dog. “—-Eh,

    “I killed your fucking dog. —kind of creepy

    See? Not so funny with the cursing.

    Well I guess it all comes down to where the curse is placed in the sentence.

    “I killed your dog fucking.” –Ok. That is kind of funny.

    Like

  15. fucking profound indeed…

    Like

    emily illinois recently posted Where was I.

  16. That does seem like a pretty good first post. My first post was about taking my kids to a University of Texas football game. As a single dad, I thought that it was a pretty decent idea at the time.

    Like

    Oilfield Trash recently posted BBQ RULES.

  17. So damn true! Question for you: how come there’s “The Joy of Sex, ” “The Joy of Cooking,” “The Joy of Signing,” “The Joy of Less,” but there is not “The Joy of Cursing?” Maybe this could be one of your projects?

    Like

  18. Bob ate cereal. Bob fucking ate cereal. Bob, fucking, ate cereal. It’s not just swearing, it’s punctuation.

    Like

    Molly recently posted Chirping- Humming- and Ululation- Noises My Dog Makes.

  19. Consistency is a virtue. A fucking virtue. Glad to see you’re upholding that one.

    My first post? Something about pushing a neighbor off the swings when I was 5. I don’t think I had a point.

    I still don’t think I have a point. Again, consistency, right? Wouldn’t want to confuse any one by all of a sudden having a point.

    Like

    Angela@beggingtheanswer recently posted A Worthwhile Endeavor.

  20. Figures that your first blog post would be nothing but the most profound, utter truth of the universe.

    The Most FUCKING profound, utter truth of the universe.

    Like

    Andie recently posted My Motivation is Playing Ferris Bueller Today.

  21. “Brevity is the soul of wit.” – Shakespeare

    Like

  22. A great start: short and sweet. You’ve only gotten better. I do appreciate your well-placed swears (I need to hone my skills).

    My first blog post was about scaring a straight guy who offered me some cheeba in a nightclub. Not the nicest start, but it set a tone.

    Like

    TQND recently posted Blue- Pink- Orange- Purple- Green.

  23. On the subject though, my first blog post ever (Jan 22 2005, 9:43 pm – on the old MSN Spaces platform) was a 3-4 line diatribe about my shitty Ford Tempo that was the bane of my existence. There was a lot of ellipsis and exclamation point abuse.

    Like

    Andie recently posted My Motivation is Playing Ferris Bueller Today.

  24. I once took a linguistics class in which the TA devoted a session to trying to solve what he called The Fucking Problem, which was basically trying to figure out the rules for when it’s okay to insert “fucking” into the middle of a word (e.g., fan-fucking-tastic). I don’t remember what we came up with.

    Like

    Laura recently posted Well- That Was Disappointing.

  25. That actually makes me sad.

    For my first post, I tried really hard to set the bar, and readers’ expectations, low.

    But I do feel bad about your dog post. Geez.

    I just made a video with my live dog, not that it’s any consolation…

    Like

    StephanieC @ Seriously?? Really? Seriously? recently posted Friday Freebie- Puppy Laptop Ebay.

  26. Best. Most Concise. Blog Post. Ever.

    GENIUS!

    Like

    Aileth recently posted Full Moon in Scorpio- Moon of Resurrection.

  27. My first post was about how you shouldn’t swallow your own tongue. Sweet jeebus.

    Like

  28. And that is why I fucking love your guts

    Like

    singlemama_cc recently posted Some people should just shut their whore mouth.

  29. Best first post ever!

    Most of us, incuding me, start with a lame-o “hello world, yet another blog is born, blah blah blah…”.

    Like

    Brahm (alfred lives here) recently posted Home alone.

  30. I like the part where you said fuck.

    Like

    furiousBall recently posted trust and go forth.

  31. and see, that is why we love you.
    i think my blog post of consisted of “this is who i am, and this is why my life is going to be funny to you: hold the line and see!”
    obviously, you win.

    Like

    Satan recently posted Peeee eSSSS.

  32. very consistent. good stuff.

    Like

    Sharon recently posted Would You Hold It Against Me.

  33. Cursing *does* make everything funnier.

    Fucking wish I’d been the one to point that out to the world. Really missed the shit ship on that one.

    Like

    Brooke Farmer recently posted Love and other deadly infections.

  34. Posted in “random crap”. I love you Jenny!

    Like

    Annadanna (from Canada) recently posted Somebody get me a time machine.

  35. Inspired.

    ahem. Sorry: fucking inspired.

    Like

    harmzie recently posted 31 Songs.

  36. When we were kids, my sister and I used to watch a version of the movie “the Jerk” that my mother had taped off of the television. One day, as adults, it happened to be on TV and for good memories we decided to watch. Imagine what a wonderful surprise it was to find out that the dog’s name was actually “shithead” and not “stupid”. For years we had labored under a 1980’s voice over illusion and were non-the-wiser….and yes, shithead was much funnier. I mean it was fucking funny as shit.

    Like

    Robin recently posted Toilet follies.

  37. Normally, I think consistency is overrated, but in your case…it works.

    Like

    a recently posted Lets talk about happier things.

  38. one time, for shits and giggles, I went back to the furthest post of yours I could go to and then read the rest up to that day’s post. Creepy? yes. but i don’t give a flying rat’s ass because it made my fucking day. And by that I totally mean a day that was fucking me. I don’t actually know what I mean by a flying rat, though. In all actuality, if I had a flying rat I really wouldn’t give it away. Not even it’s ass. Maybe it’s shit though. Actually wait… the shit of a flying rat?? yea, I wouldn’t give that away either. I’d sell it. on my blog. along with videos of my rat flying. This is starting to sound like an amazing buisness idea. Anyone know any scientists that are conducting experiments on combining animal DNA in order to make random rodents fly… like perhaps rats? I’d just need one. Or maybe two. That way they could breed and I could sell flying rat babies. Wow. I need to post here more often… this is the best idea i’ve come up with for a while!
    since I came up with it on your site, i’ll give you some of the proceeds, Jenny. That way you can stick around for another 4 years. Because I need this kind of inspiration.

    Like

  39. I enjoy reading Jenny but not every post is “awesome” or “fantastic”
    I fucking love reading Jenny but not every fucking post is fabulous or “best” as shit.
    Be real. Please.

    Like

    Laurie F. recently posted Wildflowers Dancing.

  40. This is a lot of pressure. I’m doomed to never start a blog now. A lot of fucking pressure.

    Like

  41. My first was a boring wankfest, but my second (which I actually wrote first) began with:

    “Fuck it. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck it”.

    I sent it to my mother, she was super proud.

    Like

    Rusty Hoe recently posted A Word From Our Sponsor XIV.

  42. My first blog post ever was some bullshit like, “Hey! This is me being all cheerleader happy and perky! Come back when I get a fucking clue because I am so great you want to be me!” *VERY* profound and introspective stuff if I do say so myself…

    Anyone who claims to have a profound first blog post is a liar. Or a spy. Or Gandhi. Yeah. Gandhi… he would have had a profound first post… Everyone else? Dirty little liars!

    Like

    Renee recently posted Drama Drama Drama!.

  43. This post is hilarious.

    This post is fucking hilarious.

    You’re right.

    Like

    Pablo recently posted Kanye West Literally Robbed.

  44. Okay, no word of a lie, after I typed my comment both dogs knocked over an 18kg bag of dog food down the goddamned stairs.

    Guess what? They get it complete with dust and cobwebs swept up in the clean up.

    Little buggers.

    Like

    StephanieC @ Seriously?? Really? Seriously? recently posted Rhetorical Questions.

  45. That was just hilarious! Come to think of it, adding some profanity is kind of adding shock value to your sentences. Everyone is sort of not expecting it. Unless you are known to be a potty-mouth.

    Like

    Tim Pollack recently posted Buying Auto Parts On the Net the Quick Way.

  46. You are proof that good things come from not getting enough attention as a child.
    I fucking love you.

    Like

  47. You’re not just consistent, you’re fucking consistent.

    Like

    Elly Lou recently posted Friday I’m in Uke aka the one where you can win a hand painted ukulele- baby.

  48. Could you please explain the difference between “fucking shit” and the non-fucking variety of shit? Also, has anybody ever caught fecal matter in flagrante delicto?

    Just asking.

    ~EdT.

    Like

    EdT. recently posted America’s Next Great Restaurant- The Names Have Been Changed….

  49. Short. Sweet. And to the fucking point.

    Awesome.

    Like

    Ed Adams recently posted Some girls are looking for Mr Right- while others are looking for Mr Next.

  50. If you ever decide to leave this whole blogging thing behind, you should just teach writing, because I got more out of this post than any fucking writing classes I’ve ever taken.

    Like

    Alan recently posted City v Suburbs- Part Two.

  51. Wait – is this a dead dog blog or a cursing blog? Now I’m confused.

    Like

  52. Seriously? Who in the world but you could get away with that shit? You’re lucky you had already discovered the thing about cursing making everything funnier. Or you would’ve been screwed.

    Like

    Jacqui recently posted An Open Letter To Lawyers.

  53. profanity or not, some people have the “it” factor…and some people have the shit factor. And, the rest hope you will eat our m&m’s every once in a while. 😀

    Like

  54. My first blog post was a bunch of rambling about myself (in numbered list form, of course.) My second post was the product of my unbridled rage at a stupid freshman after he refered to me as “woman.” My third post was going to be about telepathic grandmas and muff pistols, but then Toy Story 3 ruined my childhood, so I never got around to that.

    Like

  55. That is completely hilarious! And true. No, not just true. FUCKING true! Word.

    PS. This post is going to have the most profanity ever gathered in one comments section. It’s a serious fuck-fest.

    Like

    Brenna recently posted A conversation at Dunkin’ Donuts.

  56. PPS to The Amazing Miss Fantasic – I actually had to google “muff pistol” after I read your comment. It was not the sex toy I imagined. Disappointed…

    Like

    Brenna recently posted A conversation at Dunkin’ Donuts.

  57. This is why I love you.
    Concise + cursing=perfection (i.e.The Bloggess)

    Like

    Johi recently posted Its just like riding a bike- unless you never learned to ride a bike.

  58. i think most people are under the impression that the simpler something is, the more profound – so you’re way ahead of the curve, oh guru woman. and if i see more than a paragraph, i usually skip it, so i am profoundly wise and therefore my opinion matters.

    Like

  59. And THIS is why we read. 🙂

    Like

    Aisha recently posted The father-son song dilemma.

  60. I know this has nothing to do with your post just now, but I found a picture of what you might look like if you were a guy. Srsly.

    http://1x.com/photo/37362/

    See! Kind of Robert Mitchumy, with five o’clock shadow…
    Of course, this is probably not you for another 20 years or so, but still.

    Like

  61. Fargelsnuffinhoffer.

    Like

  62. That has to be the most concise blog ever. I love you so much Jenny! By contrast my first blog was wordy and sickly heartfelt. I’m mushy like that.

    Like

    Jodi recently posted Okay Mrs Ranty Pants.

  63. Thank goodness you got more verbose.

    Like

  64. I wonder how people would have reacted to, “My fucking grandma just died”

    Like

    Rachael recently posted We terrify waiters and I’m a midget ant.

  65. I think mine was some emo crap on Diaryland in 2001.

    Hasn’t changed much, except I now use my own name.

    Like

  66. At least it’s way more hilarious than mine. I just checked and it was about bread. There’s a cellphone picture of the bread. Total failure. At least, there was no where to go but up.

    Like

  67. I wrote about the first time I ever met my fiance. Because, you know, people needed to know how lame I actually am.

    Like

    Chelsie recently posted Movin’ on up.

  68. Particularly funny is profanity that is made up. fuckitty for example.

    My first post was about how I my grades were subpar in college and I felt like I was failing at life.

    It had nary a swear word which clearly meant it was a fucking awful post.

    This might be the most I’ve ever said fuck in my life. Thanks, for turning me into a potty mouth, Jenny.

    Like

    Deidre recently posted Should I I shouldnt Should I I shouldntwaitShould I I really shouldnt Or Should I.

  69. Consistency is a virtue (I think) which makes you the most virtuous blogger I know.

    Like

    Barbara recently posted The Cat Letters.

  70. Profundity is overrated. Fucking overrated. As is profanity. Now isn’t this profound?

    Like

    sandrine recently posted Free Will and Spiders.

  71. I am biased, but I kind of enjoy telling readers I have pictures of them fellating goats. Fuck if I didn’t wet my pants when one of them sent me a picture of the real deal.

    Fuck adds a bit of a zing to that line above, but it just doesn’t remove the look of horror at the thought of that poor goat. Time to bleach my eyes.

    Like

    Jack@TheJackB recently posted Do You Worry About Your Credibility.

  72. Love it! And love that it was dated on my 30th birthday!

    Like

    Gabriela - Living La Vida Normal recently posted SOC Sunday - 3202011 - Whos first.

  73. That’s hilarious…

    That’s fucking hilarious

    …yes, agreed!

    Like

  74. I thought for a moment this was a new post.
    But it wasn’t.
    I was disappointed.
    That is all.
    This is really a waste of a comment. I’m sorry.

    Like

    Rachael recently posted We terrify waiters and I’m a midget ant.

  75. My first blog post was probably about sandwiches. Really, it should have been about fucking sandwiches. But that just isn’t right.

    I need more tips for blogging.

    Like

    Jo and the Novelist recently posted My fashion errors could see me walking the plank if I’m not careful….

  76. oh! I ate a whole cheesecake!
    Oh shit! I ate a whole fucking cheesecake!
    Not only is it funnier, but it also makes you feel better about doing bad things.
    Thanks Jenny, you fucking made my day!

    Like

  77. OMG You’re right. I just tried it.

    Before: “Kids, wake up.”

    After: “Hey you fucking kids. Wake the fuck up. Fuck.”

    They didn’t wake up any faster but I sure as Hell had more fun trying.

    Like

    moooooog35 recently posted Wrapping Up the Week - March 27- 2011.

  78. 79
    Stephanie smirnov

    I’m sorry, I stopped listening to all of you at comment 55.
    MUFF PISTOL?

    Like

  79. I don’t even want to look at my first post. I’m certain it was awful.

    Like

    Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted My daughters don’t want me to tell you this….

  80. Ah, I think I read that in Chicken Soup for the Motherfucking Soul, right?

    Like

    Suniverse recently posted The Week in Review AND THE BIG WINNER!!.

  81. But look how far you’ve come? Now, we not only hear the cursing about the dog dying, but we also get the cursing around the burial antics!

    (Dogs dying and their burials are not supposed to be funny, how do you do that? Make us laugh at such things?)

    (Also, exactly how many dogs have you, uh, lost? I mean, I have a bloody trail of hamsters, goldfish, and parakeets behind me but so far, I’ve managed to keep the dogs alive.)

    (And now I’m wondering if I should even hit POST on this. Because beloved dogs that die on us are generally not comedic material. Sigh. But here goes nothing…)

    Like

    JustLinda recently posted From the file of things you never thought you’d have to say….

  82. Seeing how much people have changed in their writing style (including my own) over time is always enlightening and funny.

    Like

    the muskrat recently posted 912 days without a golden shower!.

  83. Consistancy is good…consitantly cursing is even better…but consitantly making me laugh is fantastic (I totally agree with JustLinda’s comment above)

    Like

  84. My writing style and the things that I care about, now, are completely different. I wouldn’t fucking dare go back there and read my oldest posts.
    I have been trying to pare down my use of the fuck-word since I got a lot of stodgy responses from people who knew me back when I was an innocent and were begging me to be classy. Like, “That was hilarious, if only I could forward it to my ladies bible study. But I can’t because it is profane.” And I’m thinking, “I’m fairly confident that your bible study wouldn’t be interested in the first time someone else was made aware of my sensitive gag-reflex but whateve.”

    But sometimes, as you’ve pointed out, cursing is just the better fucking mode of linguistical transportation.

    Like

    Libby recently posted After I posted this- all the ads on my side bar are for things like the Oral B tongue cleaner What Google must think of me.

  85. I like your first post way better than mine. I also like your other posts better than mine. Thanks for the inferiority complex.

    Like

    Daddy Scratches recently posted CandlesThe preceding title is Exhibit A in the case of The Day Job That Sucked The Creativity Out of Me.

  86. Honestly, your first post seems more on point than a lot of the blathering masses I’ve read who spent half my life explaining the same thing.

    That’s right, I used blathering… I’m on sudafed and can be wordy! 😛

    Speaking of Sudafed, how come spell-check doesn’t see this word as real but has no issue with lol. And why does it assume I mean Sudanese? I don’t even know what a Sudanese is but I doubt it has as many cough and cold cures as Sudafed. Asshole spell-checker.

    Anyhow, I liked your first post… and I’m thankful you have continued the trend. 🙂

    Like

    Tim recently posted Have I mentioned she’s a saint.

  87. Is it crazy/awesome that I logged on here before any actual work application this morning? After seeing this post, I know I made the right decision. I also looked back at my post, it was Op-Ed piece on gay marriage when I fancied myself a philosopher. Now I draw picture and talk about people sharting at Barneys.

    Like

    John B recently posted March Madness Pirate Orgy.

  88. My first post weighed the pros and cons of being burried at sea…you know, the obvious problem with “visitor parking”. I think this a real issue that needs to be addressed.

    Like

    Mrs. P recently posted When it talks to me now- I totally understand.

  89. My first blog post was all introspective and sincere and soul-baring.
    And boring. I should have gone your route a LONG time ago!

    Like

    Sarah recently posted A Perfect Spring Day.

  90. That’s pretty profound.

    That’s pretty fucking profound.

    Hey, did does make everything better!!

    Like

    June with a Cleaver recently posted An Open Letter To The Mean Kids I Went To School With.

  91. I am all about cursing for effect and enhancement, but when you have a five your old in the house, you have to be responsible about it. We make sure our daughter understands that those are “at home words” and she just can’t go running around saying them wherever the fuck she pleases. So far, so good.

    Like

    Lori recently posted The Stars Along My Walk of Fame.

  92. Obviously, I meant “five year old”. But hey, I got the “fuck” part right which is all that really matters!

    Like

    Lori recently posted The Stars Along My Walk of Fame.

  93. TIP:

    Although mostly true, this is NOT valid if you’re currently labeled as “the defendant.”

    Like

    moooooog35 recently posted Wrapping Up the Week - March 27- 2011.

  94. I’ve never said anything profound in my life and I’m way the HELL older than you. Don’t start now…I haven’t.

    Is your dog still dead?

    Like

    Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up) recently posted In which i get second guessed.

  95. Talk about setting a tone.

    Like

    Lori @ In Pursuit of Martha Points recently posted Proctor and Gamble Owes Me 4000.

  96. Hmm. Perhaps we could try some iconic quote testing on this…

    “Oh, the fucking humanity!” check.
    “That’s one small step for man, one giant fucking leap for mankind.” check
    “I am not a fucking crook” check
    “Fucking Winning.” check

    Yep, I fully support your theory.

    Like

    Dangerboy recently posted Trip Down Nostalgia Street- vol 7.

  97. Yep. That’s about right.

    Like

    CatZila recently posted My Coworkers Want Me Dead.

  98. You and your fucking dogs crack me up.

    Like

    Michele recently posted Red &amp White Quilt Show.

  99. Ha!

    Or should I say, “Fucking, ha!”

    Sigh.

    You are way funnier than I will ever be.

    Like

  100. I posted random inappropriate thoughts for a year on a Tumblr blog before I actually started truly blogging. Once I transferred to an official blog/site my first post started out something like this: “Holy Shit y’all!!”

    …and then something along the lines of how someone was dumb enough to let me have my own corner of the web. Basically I cursed a lot (because I could) and rambled (turns out that’s a trend in my life)

    Like

    Jessica recently posted Warning Signs are Like Invitations.

  101. On my about me page which I wrote before my first post I said. “Don’t fuck with me” .

    Way to be warm and inviting to the potential 1 of 10’s who might come to read it.

    I might as well have told everyone to go fuck right off. That would have been better. Or not.

    Who let me have a blog?

    Like

    A Vapid Blonde recently posted Why You Should Think Twice About Sending That Chain Email- A PSA From Me.

  102. I am even more convinced I should remove my first post, except it would shorten the life of my blog by a year. Earnest, I was.

    Like

    Penbleth recently posted Mostly silent Sunday by the sea.

  103. I used to curse a lot on my blog. I need to do that again. Damn it!

    Oooh, you’re fucking right!

    Like

  104. Cursing can also make things more serious.

    If I have a carpet installation business, It would sound silly if I called it “Fred’s Carpet Installation.” Nobody would take me seriously. But if I called it “Fred’s Fucking Carpet Installation” people would take me more seriously.

    Like

    Fred Miller recently posted Funniest Karate Punch Ever.

  105. 106
    OberlinGal

    OK, but if it was a really great dog, and you’re going to miss it, shouldn’t it be:
    My dog fucking died.

    Otherwise, it sounds like you didn’t like your dog much. Which maybe you didn’t. Kinda depends on what noun you want to modify, I guess – the dog or death.

    You could do both, but that seems a little over the top:
    My fucking dog fucking died.

    Ah, fuck it. It’s your blog, do what you want.

    Like

  106. 107
    Pam up north

    Fucking makes everything better…”I can’t fucking believe it’s not fucking butter!”
    Thanks for the reminder Jenny, and have a nice, fucking day.

    Like

  107. Sometimes I really wish swearing wouldn’t send me straight to Hell. It’s a marvel people even read my blog. I use “crap” so often that my craving for an adequate replacement is akin to preganat woman/pickles.

    FYI, there is none. I’ve looked. Hard.

    Crap.

    Like

    The Weed recently posted New Pet!.

  108. I’ve done it. I’ve soooo done it. But I typically hurry up and hide my computer screen when someone walks into the room. So I highly appreciate that you didn’t…and also defended it. You rock

    Like

    Chrissy recently posted Sunday Skit- How to enforce a 2 hour max TV rule with a strong-willed toddler.

  109. You are awesome sprinkled on awesome. My first posts are pathetic enough to make me cry. And not in a good way. Or a fucking good way.

    Like

    Neeroc recently posted Saps.

  110. Cursing indeed makes everything funnier. You have always been educational. Yes you are consistent if nothing else. ^_^

    Like

    subWOW recently posted Can’t Hardly Wait.

  111. My first blog posting I entitled “Virgin Blog” so, of course, I get tons of spam comments on THAT posting. Apparently the word “virgin” brings all the porn spammers running! Since half my posts are dirty.. its kinda appropriate! lol

    Like

  112. Like Haiku, but better. Like, fucking Haiku.

    Like

    Nicole (Ninja Mom) recently posted The favor you didnt ask for.

  113. The first Bloggess post I read is the Blogess’ first post four years after the fact. flol

    Like

    Chauncy Gardiner recently posted In Context.

  114. While discussing this post (naturally) with my dad, over bangers and mash served by fake Irish people, we realized that almost universally the sentence gets funnier the later you move the swearword in the sentence:

    Fuck, my dog died. (Sad)
    My fucking dog died. (Bitter, a little funny)
    My dog fucking died. (A great excuse not to get anything done for at least a week.)
    My dog died fucking. (Priceless.)

    Like

  115. I think my first blog post ever was about slagging off a character from some old Korean drama nobody else watches and eating a square of chocolate.

    But the non-profound posts are the best ones!
    Oh, I mean “the non-profound ones are the fucking best ones!”

    Like

1 trackbacks

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.