I’m writing a bunch more comments than I’m getting credit for

I read lots of blogs.  I laugh and/or cry at them.  I write long, thought-out, vaguely-witty comments.  I fill out my email address and blog url and name above the lengthy comment and hit “submit comment”.  I wait several impatient seconds while your blog thinks. Your blog shows me my comment and asks me if I really want to submit this or if I’d like to change up some shit first. I start to second-guess myself but then I soldier on, hitting the “No, I totally want to submit this comment because why else would I have hit ‘submit comment’ and I’d appreciate it if you’d stop questioning me because it’s making me paranoid thankyouverymuch” button. Your blog thinks again for a few seconds. My comment pops up underneath all of your other comments along with my picture (hi, me) and I feel very grown-up and technologically savvy.  Then I hit the “back” button to return to your homepage but one quarter of a millisecond before I let go of the back button your page flashes with a “Oh, and don’t forget to write these blurry words and/or do some math for us first to prove you’re not a robot or else your comment won’t actually be submitted. We apparently have a lot of problems with robots. I’m sure you understand” and I scream “NOOOOOOOOOOO!” and everything moves in slow motion as I try to find a way to stop time but it doesn’t work and the page flashes back to a now-totally-blank comment box.  I try to go forward.  Nothing.  I try to go back.  Nothing.

I bang my head against the keyboard and cry a little.  I have no idea what I’d written in my now-erased comment and  now I’ve also forgotten what the post was about and where I live.

I fill out my name, email and url again.

In the comment box I simply write “lol”, and vaguely hope that this wasn’t a post about how your grandparents just died.

I vow to never, ever do this again.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

**********************

This week’s Shit-I-did-when-I-wasn’t-here is a bit short since I’m a titch distracted with terrifying deadlines but it’s still totally worth it.  Probably.

Illustration courtesy of the lovely @MissMortis

What you missed on Ill-Advised:

  • Nothing.  That’s how behind I am.

What you missed on Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle:

What you missed on my sex column (which is satirical and vaguely safe for work if your boss isn’t a complete douche-canoe):

What you missed in my shop (tentatively named “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

What you missed on the internets:

This week on Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:

136 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Wow. It ain’t even Sunday yet…

    Like

    tokenblogger recently posted It’s all rain- watches- and warnings….

  2. I discovered the joy of commenting on blog on an iphone yesterday.

    Yes, I know, welcome to 2008… shut up.

    I am not commenting on anyone elses but my own now. Cause that shit bites.

    and

    lol

    Like

    Kelley @ magnetoboldtoo recently posted The Royal Wedding – MB2 Style.

  3. Makes sense and seems familiar. You can always make me smile and that isn’t easy since they took the meds away.

    Like

  4. I hate that word verification thing. I always think my civic duty of commenting is done and BAM it wasn’t and my witty (or boring) comment is gone and I’m too damned lazy to figure it out again.

    Like

    Jill recently posted Thanksgiving- 2005.

  5. Wow. You are one busy woman.

    Like

    lceel recently posted Out of town on a rail.

  6. 6
    Lilscorpiosweet

    Yep. I do the same thing and want to throw things. Then I realize that if I throw things my very precious money has been wasted because I broke something very expensive. *SMH*

    Like

  7. I’d suggest in a superior way that you should select all and copy your text before leaving the field, but that would imply that I do that. I don’t do that, and I encounter the same.fucking.thing.constantly. Or there’s some weird questionaire or log in that is too insane to even bother trying to leave a comment.

    I have to do a word verification to comment on my own blog. It sucks, and I still get stupid spammer “what’s your next tweet”ish comments. WTF.

    Like

    mrtl recently posted Extremes of Patience.

  8. Hmm, I apologize for the blurry wordgate. If I didn’t have one, people would hate on me with impunity and my self-esteem is fragile. NO, that’s not … entirely true — my temper is legendary and starting flame wars on my own blog really sucks. But, if you have ever left a long and bodacious comment for me that my paranoia has ruined, I am deeply, humbly and most assuredly contrite to my toenails (which are not painted or pedi’d and probably should be b/c as a yoga teacher, people see more of my feet than is too their liking).

    And, you write beautifully for a zombie. Truly.

    Like

    annie recently posted Mea Culpa Sure- Whatever.

  9. I’m mostly too lazy to deal with the captcha to do a comment in the first place. So you win already.

    Like

    amanda recently posted A Little Hope.

  10. Love your blog, my brain is mush for very much the same reason, BUT your post sure sounds good underwater (where I am, in case there was any question). I’m laughing my @$$ off and especially lovin’ the 8lbs of coke note.

    Like

  11. fyi, I’m responding here to your Tweet, hence the mushy-brain comment…

    Like

    Kim B recently posted Thursday Book Rec.

  12. what’s worse is when you type out a long reply with one hand because you are nursing or just finished nursing, and what took 30 minutes to an hour to type gets wiped out in 30 seconds. Happens to me daily. no shit.

    Like

    L.A.C.E. recently posted You Can Add Chew Toy To My Resume.

  13. Yes, I do that ALL the time. The CAPTCHAs get me about 90% of the time and eat my wonderful, thoughtful comments in the process.

    So frustrating!

    Like

    Life of a Doctor's Wife recently posted A Peek Inside My Bedroom.

  14. Commenting is hard. I find that when my most poignant (read: inappropriately open) I am logged into one of my clients’ wordpress accounts, typically the one with the handle “get more” and I come across as unimaginative and oddly touchy feely spam.

    Like

    amanda recently posted 1095.

  15. LOL

    Like

  16. Not gonna lie. I totes just checked if my blog does this mother fucking retarded waste of time. I hate being mistaken for a robot with those things. I mean damn. I’ve worked my whole life to master my robot skills and when I’m a robot, I’m a damn good one so there won’t be any mistaking, but when I’m NOT a robot I just want to scream and cry and belt out WHY!!!’s till my neighbors come banging on my door. So yeah. I get you, girl.

    Like

    Nicole Welkener recently posted Who is this I Hate Mass Texts.

  17. Yes! Sense! It makes sense.
    I always feel vaguely creepy when commenting on blogs (LIKE I DO RIGHT NOW !), but when I get comments I’m gleefully happy about it, so.

    Nevermind.

    Like

    Kelly recently posted A Craigslist Missed Connection ad to myself.

  18. I hear where you are coming from about the comments. This usually only happens when you are very passionate about the subject you are commenting on too, and happened to write like a book about the article you are commenting on……then….its gone, as is the passion, motivation, and time. Tis the age of competing against robots I guess.

    Like

    Adam recently posted Olive Garden’s Sweepstakes Gives Away Italian Vacations and Free Meals.

  19. See what I did there? ; )

    I think this occurrence is totally relatable on a universal scale.

    Like

  20. I recently went through a bunch of ‘captcha’ bullshit to enter a giveaway. The blogger wanted each entry to be a separate comment, so each time I had to solve pi to get the entry in. Boo!

    Like

    Misfit Mommy recently posted Big Little Voice.

  21. I love this post, solely because you used the phrase “a titch” which happens to be my blog name in it🙂

    Like

  22. I hate whn my thoughts disappear into the ether.

    But sometimes it’s better that way.

    Like

  23. I hate when that happens. This was my favorite part of your post, “I’ve also forgotten what the post was about and where I live.”, lol, you crack me up. Also that unicorn thing was so disturbing, awesome!

    Like

    Mary recently posted Movie Quotes- Due Date.

  24. Ok, I’ve been commenting a lot and been vaguely worried that I was doing something wrong when I had to click “post comment” ‘leventy-two times and detonate a bomb MacGyver style before my comment actually posted. So relieved. And totally applying for a job on the bomb squad, because I’m getting good at that shit.

    Like

  25. I think, after watching the unicorn vid, I’m all out of funny. I did send it to everyone I know though. I had to share the love and damn the consequences. I’m not sure if I was more frightened by that big ass horn or the scary man thong/tail. Were his shoes spray painted or did he have on a body stocking on over shoes? These are really important questions!

    Like

    Kelly recently posted I see the sun.

  26. I wrote a post on CAPTCHA (the annoying word verification thingy on blogs) and how it basically sucks. I started to think I didn’t know how to read anymore. Then, I went to the Seventh Generation website to learn how to “clean greener” and then a math problem was thrown at me to verify that I was “human” (their word not mine) and that’s when I knew they obviously weren’t following my blog. Pain in the ass.

    Like

    Marisa @ I failed math. recently posted I woke up yesterday morning and found this in my inbox via Twitter.

  27. I hate all that security stuff. Really, I’m not a blog terrorist or anything and I’m insulted when I have to fill out all kinds of security information as if I were Princess Otbjiodfsi from Nigeria.

    Like

    Sharyn recently posted May I Share With You Some May Holidays.

  28. Dude, you have to get Roxanne to submit bitch-pigeon to Urban Dictionary. That shit is GOLD. Love it. Almost as much as I love you. But you’re better, because you’re not a pigeon OR shitty. Clearly. *ahem*

    Like

    Chibi Jeebs recently posted Wordless Instagram Friday It is Friday- right.

  29. Oh, I can navigate CAPTCHA like a goddamn champion, but every week when I read your blog I can’t seem to remember to NOT close every fucking window and have to re-start from the beginning. I did it three damn times on this post alone. So at least you’re not doing that.

    Like

    Christine recently posted Oh Momma….

  30. Blurry wordgates hate me. HATE ME. I misread/ mistype them frequently. I can be found banging my head on my keyboard yelling fuck fuck fuck a lot. I think my toddler will swearing by the time he’s 2.

    Like

    Alison@Mama Wants This recently posted Two sides.

  31. If I thought for one second you had tried and not been able to leave a comment on my blog, I’d (first) weep piteously and then totally open my blog to comments with no barriers at all and a “please comment-rape me” neon sign on it.

    Again, I am wishing I could draw because I think a naked blog with a “please comment-rape me” neon sign would be an awesome piece of DeviantArt!

    Like

    MsDarkstar recently posted Beauty Duty - Ten on Tuesday.

  32. My comment was going to be outright sexual but I thought better, hit back, came forward again, and it was still here. Deleted it to show it I still have the power.

    That is all.

    /comments yay!

    Like

  33. Fuckin’ internet cookies, captchas, and general Blogger-ridiculousness.

    Jenny, my sister just turned me down to getting her hair and make-up done with me on my wedding day. And it’s crushing me. Why am I telling you? I have no idea.

    That is all.

    Like

    StephanieC @ Seriously?? Really? Seriously? recently posted Inspired By A Meatbag.

  34. You can add me to the list of people who hate captchas. I totally fail at them.

    Like

    Brenna recently posted Overheard.

  35. Wow. What is WITH that unicorn guy? I’ve never been so upset by a unicorn in my life.

    Also, I love the hat. That should be an everyday hat, not just a special-occassion hat.

    Like

    Annadanna (from Canada) recently posted Shitionary Sunday - Prepare Yourselves.

  36. Yeh! You hit the nail on the head. I have lost track of the number of times I have lost a comment because of a delayed loading of the word verification.

    We need a plan to deal with this. How about everytime we lose a comment, we go back and post a single word to let the blogger know they need to get rid of Captchas? I think that the word should be ‘marmalade’

    Like

    Annie (Lady M) x recently posted The holiday blog with no name because I cant think of one.

  37. The unicorn thing is a total winner! I immediately emailed your post to several friends. I hope that some day I get sent weird ambiguous animal porn videos.

    Like

  38. TOTALLY worth it.
    and thank you SO MUCH for not making us jump through hoops to post a comment!

    Like

  39. That’s why I don’t have captchas on my blog, Jenny. I do it for you. Even though you’ve only ever written me one comment, I do it for you.

    What I hate is when I forget to check if I’m signed in to Blogger, and I type up this huge comment about how I feel about the subject, and it’s always funny. And then I go to hit submit and am forced to another page where I can sign in…and my comment is lost. I try to get into the habit of copying every comment I post before I hit submit in case it happens, I could just paste it. But sometimes I forget. And those times are the times when people die.

    Like

    Sarah Elizabeth recently posted Why Applying For Jobs Is A Really Weird Experience.

  40. I am definitely stealing your lol tip.

    I did the forget to enter the word and wait thing no less than three times on the same person’s blog earlier today and eventually just re-worded the person before me’s comment. It was a lame, lame thing to do but I was tired and thought I might stab myself in the eye if I tried to figure out my comment again.

    I can only pretend to be witty and insightful on someone’s blog post so many times. I’m no robot.

    I truly believe eliminating the word verification thing on my blog is one of the nicest things I have EVER done. I’m basically a saint. I should be treated as such.

    Like

    The Mommy Therapy recently posted I Have A Wedding to Wake Up For- But I Thought Id Say Hello.

  41. After being bitten more times than I can count, I now always do a quick CTRL + C before submitting blog comments😉 It slightly minimises my rage when my comment doesn’t go through, and I find myself staring at the blank comment box again.

    Like

  42. Bitch-pigeon…ROCKS!!! totally stealing it -Cause I think I know several….

    Like

    LibraryGirl62 recently posted Dang Girl.

  43. My blog is CAPTCHA-free, mostly because I’m so bad at them that they make me start to doubt my own humanity.

    Like

    Laura recently posted My Decision to Discontinue My Participation in the Spring Valley Herald’s Weekly Caption Contest.

  44. You know that every time you lose a comment on a blog, you’re supposed to drink a shot, right? Except on my blog where you can comment capcha-free and still be welcome to do shots when you leave a comment or even when you don’t.

    Like

    Zoie @ TouchstoneZ recently posted Spank Out Day.

  45. WHEW. Thank God you posted that because I assumed you had tried to comment on every blog post I’ve written, and now I have confirmation. I can now quit going through your garbage and staring at the back windows of your house – love that robe! Back to listening to the Beatles’ White Album backwards.

    Like

    Julie the Wife recently posted Checking in With The Peeps.

  46. I’m mostly blind and kinda deaf, so those captcha things are pure, steamy evil shat from Satan’s backside. The audio version sounds like robots having sex, and the visual ones make me feel like I’m taking an exam I didn’t study for. Like a Rorschach ink blot. And that sucks, because every single one of those things looks like a butterfly with boobs to me.

    Did that make sense?

    Like

    Chelsie recently posted There’s no place like home.

  47. I don’t have a blog and I don’t have an iPhone, so I just thought it was me and my “you don’t have an iPhone” Blackberry. I also tend to write a lot when I comment – and I always feel like the author is annoyed that I’ve gone on and on… Even though if it were me, I’d love all the feedback.

    Like

  48. Lol. No but seriously you are h-y-s-t-e-r-i-c-a-l. This is the first time I have ever clicked through to your other blogs….laughing so hard that hubby just told me to sushhh as he was trying to read the paper (not successful, still laughing).

    And just in case there is any chance this hasn’t made it your way yet…last night this made me laugh so hard I almost fell off the lounge #royalwedding – http://twitpic.com/4r3mes

    Like

    JJ recently posted Thanks y’all.

  49. If you use Chrome, you should check out the Lazarus plugin. It remembers form fields for you for just such an occasion. It’s a lifesaver… because srsly, losing comments from you is a life or death situation! https://chrome.google.com/extensions/detail/loljledaigphbcpfhfmgopdkppkifgno

    Like

  50. Captcha can eat me but then it probably wouldn’t get it right the first time so it would have to do it over and over again. That wouldn’t be a bad thing though…..

    Like

    Elle recently posted If I had balls- they’d be hurting right now.

  51. I can handle those damned blurry words if they are there to begin with. I HATE when they show up after the fact cause I’ve lost a shit ton of comments that way too.

    Like

    Kristin recently posted Zoinks.

  52. Fuck you BACK button. FUCK YOU.

    Phew, that felt good…

    Like

    Theresa recently posted Put on a -.

  53. I think your blog ate my comment – and now it says ‘you already submitted that’ grrrr irony internet. Contained miles of praise for your hysterical-ness and your royal feathered hat…!

    Like

    JJ recently posted Thanks y’all.

  54. There’s an add-on with Firefox called Lazarus. It saves everything you type so you can recover it if you close a window or something. Great stuff, that Lazarus.

    Like

    Karsun recently posted Extreme Couponing Conversation.

  55. 56
    MissMortis

    I just have to comment to say I spazzed when I saw my art, I sent it to like everyone I know going “LOOK SHE USED IT!!”.

    Like

  56. Is it wrong that I cried at the end of the Scarlett Cherry video and I’m not even a new mom? Or a girl?

    Like

  57. That rooster hat? Be glad you’re not me, because that’s how I look every morning after I overdry my curly locks, then I have to use $10 worth of “product” to tame it down to normal. Having Chaka Khan hair is really not as fun as it sounds. Oh? It doesn’t sound fun? Welcome to my life.

    Like

    Kathy recently posted Who is This Person.

  58. 59
    Lol Trendall

    Just starting out, my website is not yet up, but I agree, captcha and other tick-box things can really frustrate me at the time. That said, after experiences with spreadsheets years ago and blue screen of death on old PCs, my answer is deep breath, cup of tea, and often second time round, if you are still motivated to post, it’s a better post as it goes straight to the point and distills the essence of your original thought. Promise not to put captcha on when the site goes live!

    Lol @hugglemama

    Like

  59. I hate those captcha words (I even feel kinda like an idiot saying captcha. Just like how I feel if I would say gangsta. I can’t do it. I’m a 46 year old caucasion woman from the midwest – it’s GANGSTER. Kids today – they don’t enunciate!)

    What was I talking about?

    Oh, I don’t like those prove-you’re-not-a-robot things. First, maybe I am. Are robots always self-aware about their robotedness? (Yes, I made that word up, but I’m totally enunciating it properly in my head.) Like, for example – what about that Matrix guy played by Keanu Reeves. WHAT ABOUT NEO? He could have filled out those fields, and yet his human form was really asleep in some pod , it wasn’t him filling out the robot fields, but HE DIDN’T EVEN KNOW!

    So, frankly, I don’t see the point.

    Plus – once I lose the brilliant comment I typed? There is just no getting it back. It’s gone. Those flashes of brilliance are like lightning and they just don’t strike twice in a row. (Well, lightning DID strike twice in a row that one time in my yard, but even just talking about it makes me sound like a rambling freak because it’s a total tangent. See what happens when I lose my train of thought? Way to go, captcha box!) (Or possibly” Way to go, God! Way to go, Genes from Mom and Dad! Way to go, Caffeine!)

    Your next post should be about how you hate it when people totally BLOG in your comments section, which I’m guilty of. I guess I’m a blog-gangsta like that. Sorry.

    Like

    JustLinda recently posted Meet the new boss- he’s the same as the old boss.

  60. (I scrolled – mine’s the longest comment in this thread. Where’s my prize?)

    (Or at least, where’s my slap on the wrist? I know, I know.)

    Like

    JustLinda recently posted Meet the new boss- he’s the same as the old boss.

  61. Sounds like you need the Lazarus form recovery add-on for Firefox! It has saved my butt a bazillion times.

    Like

  62. I hate Captcha. It’s even a stupid name. Like “Back atcha!” with a guy doing a finger shooter winky wink at you.

    I often copy my most brilliant comments before hitting submit. Seriously. I have lost stuff that I absolutely KNEW would alter the blogger’s existence, only to have it disappear into cyberspace because of some idiotic robot detector malfunction.

    Like

    Tracey - JustAnotherMommyBlog recently posted Rose-colored glasses would be lovely- thanks.

  63. I agree that bitch-pigeon really is the best insult ever. I think I’ll use it. Possibly at my mother-in-law. But only under my breath, ’cause she really is like Satan. I mean, I think she has evil powers. And, that unicorn…thing, it is way disturbing. I really can’t thank you for making me watch it. I feel like it’s one of those images that will forever pop up in my brain at strange moments. Creepy…

    Like

    Becky recently posted Busting an Infertility Myth.

  64. 65
    Joan J. Fahlgren

    The solution to this loss problem is to use Firefox with the Lazarus Form Recovery add-on. When you return to the page that is now black, right click and there will be a list of all your recent form fillers, just click on the right one and you are back in business.

    Like

  65. This happens to me a lot.

    I also think Captcha is trying to kill me. It says really mean things to me all of the time.

    Like

  66. You just made me want to finally break down and sign up for twitter. Well…that and the fact that I don’t really have to download anything new. I broke my phone and have my hubby’s old one and it’s already set up. Wow…does he follow some BORING people! Must fix that…

    As you can see…I don’t suffer from that need to post well thought out, relevant comments. I blame the meds.

    Like

  67. I wish they would have “Blinded by the Light” on Karaoke. and not just because I want to know the words without looking them up on google.

    Like

    LA Juice recently posted Winner Winner Chicken Dinner.

  68. also I feel bummed that I missed the twitter insult fest. My current favorite name to call people is “Snot Rocket”. It really throws people off their game.

    Like

    LA Juice recently posted Winner Winner Chicken Dinner.

  69. I can’t stop listening to the Scarlet Cherry album. And I want her hat. Excellent recommendation, as always.

    Like

  70. I agree with you about the comment thing. I really hate typing the scramble word too, sometimes it is really hard to read. Then some of them have you click the comment submit button like 5 times. Sometimes I just give up and say screw it. Your hat would have rocked everyone elses hat, well except Prince Edward’s daughter, the pinkish tan one. The one Joan Rivers said looked like an IUD. I forget her name, I think it is Eugenie or something like that.

    Like

    Connieemeraldeyes recently posted Photo challenge One.

  71. I hate captchas. I get 100 spam comments a night and I still don’t care enough to turn it on.

    Like

  72. No matter how much I squint and type slowly, I can never get word verification right on the first try. Or the second. By the third fail, I usually give up and curse technology, which is why I’d much rather delete spam comments on my own blog than make people go through the hell that is word verification.

    Like

  73. I’ve done that enough times that I always select all and copy before I try to send anything now, so if there’s a problem I can start over and paste it back in. Or I compose it in a Word file.

    I don’t mind the math verifications (as long as it’s not too complicated, like that “if a train leaves St. Louis at 3pm…” bullshit) but I very rarely get the blurry words right the first time. Perhaps I should schedule an eye exam.

    Like

  74. I do that all.the.time. and it pisses me off. even worse is when I do it when commenting from my phone. that drives me effin’ insane. I recently (in the last few months) and per request of some more-popular-and-famous-than-me-bloggers/tweeters (they were tweeting about it, and I joined the conversation) removed the word verification from my blogs… I was complaining about the spam comments I’d received, but as one of them asked me how many spam I actually get, and since I have very few people who actually read my blogs, let alone COMMENT on them – I thought they made good points, and took it right off… and yeah. Whatdoyaknow – they were right. I’ve received no more spam since removing it than I ever did previously…

    also – the Feather Hat was awesome and the Samurai Unicorn was strangely disturbing. Thanks for sharing🙂

    PS – I posted my very first ever vlog, and it’s pretty rough. I ramble like an idiot. oh wait… anyway. it’s linked here (I think, maybe??) so if you’re interested in rambling… oh, and a singing toddler – please feel free to watch, laugh, and make jokes at my expense. It’s what I would do, er… have done?😉

    Like

    Rusti recently posted Inspiration Behind the Blog Title.

  75. I dated that samurai unicorn a few times. He kept waving that sword around and would not let go of it. Obsessed creep.

    At the third date, I convinced him to take the mask off. And what was underneath? A damn bull head … and no offense, but I don’t date minotaurs.

    Like

    The Queer Next Door recently posted Dallas &amp Chris.

  76. The first thing I do is open notepad on which to compose all my witty comments. Then I copy and paste into the comment field. If the comments mysteriously disappear, I can copy and paste again. I also save all my comments in case any are worth expanding into a blog post or essay. I probably won’t save this comment.

    Like

    Dan Burt recently posted Captain Canard presents Fun Hatch.

  77. There isn’t a better way to start a Sunday than Tim Minchin on your blog…perfect morning mix. Bitch-pigeon is going directly to my personal lexicon. Brilliant.

    Like

    Jeane recently posted Things to do in the sun…because it has to come eventually!.

  78. Rooster Hat: Bloody fantastic!

    Samuri Unicorn: Hypnotic. Disturbing, but hypnotic. Horn is … ummm… impressive. hehe.
    After the video, they suggested “Black (or was it brown) Dog” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKEjqcY90bQ&feature=player_embedded I think it’s the same guy. Don’t quote me on that. Not as impressive or hypnotic. Still disturbing.

    Oh! And “The Stir” seems to think your daughter is 5. *eye roll* Nice to see THEY read your stuff. Sheesh!

    Like

    Tracey recently posted Happy Earth Day!!.

  79. I dont have the word verification thing on my blog because I’m secretly hoping for some robot spam.

    Like

    Sarcasm in Action recently posted Apparently- Im in the Minority on this One.

  80. I love that hat. Can I borrow it? I need to go to Wal-mart. I’m hoping to be memorialized while there. Me in a pair of Daisy dukes with that hat should do it.

    Like

    Bodaciousboomer recently posted Finally an answer to something that has vexed me for awhile.

  81. The unicorn samurai made my day. That was amazing.

    Like

  82. What I hate more than explosive baby diarrhea and trying to spell diarrhea? Comment verification AND comment moderation on at the same time. People: you don’t need either, yet you’re using both? You’re not the CIA. Although if you’re the PTA, I’d understand completely.

    Like

  83. yes.

    Like

    Frogpondsrock recently posted Sunday Selections 17.

  84. Using captcha instead of a real spam filter is like being too lazy to pour the piss out of your own boots. Captcha is medieval, people. It has to be a damn good blog before I’ll mess with captcha. Or anything like it.

    Like

    Fred Miller recently posted For My Mom.

  85. I hope that doesn’t happen to me after I type this really awesome and well thought out comment. I’m sure I won’t be able to remember it to type it over again.

    Like

    Jacqui recently posted Secret Messages….

  86. Captcha is a terrorist plot. The end.

    Like

    Elly Lou recently posted This Week’s Tweets.

  87. 88
    Procrastinateher

    You know what’s worse? Trying to type a comment, failing at laptop use and somehow magically the Backspace button that used to remove my spelling errors now becomes the Back button.
    Then before I know it, I’ve backed myself out so far that I’ve signed myself out of whatever I was signed in to, so if I even bother to try commenting or ‘liking’ something again I will lose that page when I’m redirected to the login.

    I’m part of Generation Y, I’m meant to breathe technology dammit.

    Like

  88. You know how in the good ole days the sundial was the appropriate tool for telling poor little peasant people what time of day it was? You, Jenny, are the sundial for my week. Your “Shit I Did This Week” posts are what help me to identify that another 7 days of my life have passed me by in a blur of letters, porn, showers in hell, and maybe a little bit of work for good measure. When I see your updates I know that once I recover from Saturday night’s hangover, I am to prepare for another week of useless shit, but your posts start me off each week with a reminder that it’s the small things in life that make it interesting.

    What I guess I’m trying to say is, thanks for not being my bitch-pigeon Jenny! *hugz*

    Like

    Loonybin recently posted Should I be alarmed that the porn sites came to me.

  89. I do the same thing in casual conversation. I equate the captcha function to the point in the conversation where I realize that, while I Was making eye contact the whole time AND nodding knowingly, I have in fact been thinking about those little plastic containers for blowing bubbles, and how they really are just dish soap in a jar, and WHY are we paying so much for a tiny bottle of SOAP WATER?! Then I realize my mother was right in lying to me all those years. “Yes, Lori Jo, It IS a new bottle of blowing bubbles! Now go play in the back yard near the propane tanks. Don’t worry, I’ll send the cat out to keep an eye on you (<– That, really happened)" That's generally when I black-back-in to the conversation and realize it's MY turn to say something. At that point there's two options. Option A: Go the "lol" route. Just chuckle a bit, maybe throw out a "Right!? Haha. Go on…..", maintain eye contact and totally try to forget about those plastic bubble wands that you KNOW you dropped in the dirt like a hundred times but Still put directly to your breathing hole, because hey, you're 6! FUCK GERMS. .. Then there's Option 2. I don't recommend Option 2 unless you're Really good friends with the other converser, or you just Really don't give a shit about them. When you realize that it's your turn, just look them dead in the eye, and tell the truth. "Do what now? Oh, I'm sorry, I TOTALLY stopped listening to you a while back. I probably should have said something, but you just seemed to be enjoying yourself so much, I didn't have the heart to stop you". As I get older, I find myself using Option 2 more and more. The results have been utterly satisfying.
    That being said. I totally forgot what your post was about. I hope there were kittens.

    Like

  90. I have the exact same problem with commenting. I leave at least three times as many comments as what actually shows up.

    Except usually I am too lazy to retry. Even an “lol.” I just get annoyed and move on.

    Like

    Brooke Farmer recently posted Awesome day in the city Finally posting some photos Sorry that took so long I suck.

  91. I usually get the comment version of stage fright and don’t submit anything. If I scrounge up the courage to click that button, I’ve either misspelled something or done the “your” instead of “you’re” thing and then I decide I HAVE to post a follow-up comment so everyone knows I KNOW about the mistake and it was just that – a mistake. And I usually fuck that comment up, too. Comments aren’t really my thing. Obviously.

    Like

    Leslie recently posted Why I Keep Writing And refrain from reading recent posts more than once.

  92. I’m amazed that you own a hat like that and didn’t get invited to the Royal Wedding. After seeing all the pictures, I sort of assumed they made a list of people with the most ridiculous hats in the world and sent them invitations. I’m not sure if yours tops Beatrice’s, but it’s definitely more ridiculous (i.e. awesome) than most of the hats that were actually there.

    I mean, fuck, you’re practically a princess now.

    Like

    Rachael recently posted Outdoor Fucking- among other things.

  93. The story of my life.

    Or my computer crashes. Either way.

    Like

    Jess Rolin recently posted Meanwhile.

  94. And my browser pretended to not submit it so I think I posted this twice.

    Shit.

    Like

    Jess Rolin recently posted Meanwhile.

  95. Oh Jenny. It’s as if you read my thoughts and blog them! I have written soooo many comments and as I hit post comment, the page gets all pissed off and my comment doesn’t post and then it is a blank form all over again. I’ve even gotten inter habit of copying my comment after I write it… JUST IN CASE I’ll have to paste it again when my pc gets all pissy at me. I’m convinced it’s something wrong with my work laptop and work’s firewall or something. Maybe they want me working and not blogging & commenting!?!? Assholes.

    Like

    BlogMuse recently posted Dogs- cats- and relations Oh my!.

  96. I hate those blurry words. I just want to comment.. Or buy tickets to see New Kids on the Block as quickly as possible.

    Like

    Karen recently posted I cant promise this is going to be a funny post unless you think fat people are funny.

  97. Jenny, you must bring the chicken hat to PR so that I may borrow it!!!!!!!! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite so fabulous!!!!!! I must wear it out one night!!!

    Like

  98. That is by far the most pain in the butt thing EVER. I hate comment verification…with a PASSION. When that happens to me I just say screw it and don’t bother to retype a comment. Their loss for not turning that God-forsaken thing off.

    Like

    Courtney @ The Mommy Matters recently posted Arrogant and Self-Glorifying…or not.

  99. 100
    Steve in Clearwater FL

    Well after not only popping Comment NUMERO UNO on Jen’s Apr 26 entry and then hitting two more in same thread, I figured I better abstain for at least five days so as to avoid a lean towards Creepy Internet Guy.

    CAPTCHA does occasionally deliver it’s own wit when the two required words can be combined to make a Funny.

    Like

  100. I love that song. I’ve never heard it before and it is now my new anthem. Thank you. Have I mentioned that you rock! You have saved me more than once when I was having a black hole day, thank you for helping me remember to laugh.

    Like

  101. I, too, have written a lot more comments than have been published. I mentioned once, in a blog I used to have, that I decided to just take those times when my comments were destroyed as a sign that they should not have been made. But then I got comments from people saying they loved my long, drawn out comments and hated the thought of not getting one just because their comment section fucked me over. So, now, instead of writing a blog, I just go around hijacking the comments sections of other people’s blogs with comments that are more than long enough to qualify as a blog post on their own. And I don’t feel bad about it anymore. As far as the comments that get destroyed, I usually just sigh and let it go…or post a really short version of it. I do always try hitting the back button, though, because these days the comments are sometimes still there. But, yeah, all that thought…and effort…sigh.

    Oh, and btw, my comments are NEVER as entertaining as yours. Never. You should totally always try reposting them. Or, try something I rarely remember to do: After a really good long comment, hit Ctrl A, Ctrl C while your cursor is still in the comment section. That way, if it happens to get lost, you just go back and hit Ctrl V. Just a small amount of time to save a great deal of frustration. If you remember to do it…

    Like

  102. Wow. Not making this up. Typed out a long comment for this post and then when I hit SUBMIT, I got an error message. Someone is watching.

    Thank you for introducing us to Scarlett Cherry and her Labor of Love album.

    Like

  103. Blogger’s been acting strange recently and on my friend’s blog a bunch of people’s comments have been devoured, never to be seen again. This has resulted in everyone else leaving a comment to say “I left the funniest fucking comment EVER and it disappeared! WTF, blogger! It could have made me the new Shakespeare!”

    All of which is to say: I really wish your blog hadn’t eaten the comment I just tried to write up. It was the most brilliant thing EVER WRITTEN. I swear.

    Like

    Rachael recently posted Outdoor Fucking- among other things.

  104. Also I am taking this as a “get out of jail free” card except instead of getting out of jail I’m pretending The Bloggess has left comments on my blog. Which automatically makes me, like, almost famous.

    Like

    Rachael recently posted Outdoor Fucking- among other things.

  105. WTF is up with those letter checking things? I just tried to post eight fucking times and each time I couldn’t get one of the letters right so I just canned my post. Seriously, I don’t have any major sight issues, I’m over thirty but still.

    Like

  106. This was not on the bloggess btw.

    Like

    Shane recently posted Top Ten Places to Hide Alcohol Around the House.

  107. OK, so I posted 2 comments here and they’re totally GONE. I hope you don’t think I’m spamming you, because I am one of your biggest fans. Not big enough to stalk you or to have a rubber mask made of your face and wear it around the house while dressed as that guy with the penis tuck from Silence of the Lambs or anything. Just a normal fan.

    So I am sooo glad that you don’t have the “type in the letter” thing on your site, because I just had to go through 8 typings of the letter thing on another site I also really like (though not as much as yours), and I had written something really profound, about love or diaper changing or booze, and then I had to just give up on it, because trying to do something 8 times is wayyy to many times.
    Unless we’re talking trying to quit smoking.

    Like

  108. Ack! I’ve seen that unicorn guy before!

    http://www.cracked.com/video_18187_does-not-compute-internets-worst-parents.html

    Completely scares the terror boner away.

    Like

  109. LOL, I love all of your posts!

    Like

    Shan recently posted While We Were Out.

  110. –>I hate the triple security to make sure I’m not SPAM because I just want to leave a comment. I don’t even like SPAM.

    Like

    WebSavvyMom recently posted Wordless Wednesday - White Dogs Cant Jump.

  111. I’ve gotten a wee bit cranky about the captcha codes, having experienced similar situations. There’s gotta be a better way.

    Like

    Fran recently posted Frankfurt- all that and then some.

  112. RIGHT?

    And LOL.

    Like

    Jen Dieffenbacher recently posted We Probably Cant Go Back To The Old Navy.

  113. I kind of really hate the word verify on blogs for that very reason. I leave mine off, and will only turn it on if I start getting spam issues.

    Like

    Dangerboy recently posted Beltane.

  114. I share your struggle with the challenges of commenting on blogs. With that said, please read mine. Love you.

    Like

    "Susan Says..." recently posted The Royal Wedding-Hatless and In Pajamas.

  115. Captcha should totally be renamed to “Gotcha” because it munches my comments all the damn time too!

    Like

    Memoirs of a Single Dad recently posted Dating Rules for the First Date.

  116. Oh, how many brilliant posts have i lost because a floater in my ancient, bleary eyes decides to float over the top of the bot screening text randomized by some equally random meth head at just the wrong moment. I suspect that my blog does this, but I am too lazy and depressed to check. No one ever leaves a comment anyway. Maybe this is why.

    Like

    Jonah Gibson recently posted Heaven and Hell.

  117. I HATE captchas. Especially with blog that have 5 readers. Really?? You’re so incredibly popular that the spammers are just hitting you left and right?

    And upon seeing bitch pigeon, I vowed to myself that this would become a permanent part of my vocabulary.

    Like

    Rachel recently posted How am I supposed to know these things.

  118. but Rachel- I only have about 10 legitimate readers, but I have a boatload of spammers…. Some might think this is a sign that people who cannot actually communicate using the English language like me. To that I say “gehzundheit you limey bassturds”

    Like

    LA Juice recently posted Where Were You when President Obama Announced Bin Laden was Dead.

  119. How did you know?? I’ve been thinking about how I need a new mouse pad for ages but haven’t found just the right one. It’s vaguley disturbing how you read my mind like that and how I’ve been avoding both Staples and Office Max in the hopes this day would come. It’s like my bithday/Christmas/4th of July/Easter/Boxing Day all in one except that I’ll be buying my own present. Best. Monday. (yeah I’m behind). EVAR.

    Like

  120. 121
    hopeewon

    Am I the only one, when on the zazzle link for the “Be Nice or I Will Stab You” mousepad, who sees this “Nice Boobs!” tshirt under Other Products You Might Like? How did they know?

    Like

  121. I had a brilliantly funny and apposite comment ready, but by the time I’d read all the other brilliantly funny etc. comments, I’d forgotten it again.

    LOL.

    Like

    Mr Farty recently posted Twitter- Watching William &amp Kate The Wedding So You Dont Have To.

  122. So sorry about your grandparents.

    Like

    moremadder recently posted Dogeared.

  123. Seen this? I suffer from this. Please help spread the word about this debilitating condition. http://blog.krisatomic.com/?p=1617

    Like

  124. I just pretend any comment that is left is actually you pretending to be someone else.

    Like

    clevelandpoet recently posted The one where I’m Scrooge McDuck.

  125. I have this problem with blogger blogs. I wonder how many people actually receive less comments because of the overzealousness (is that a word?) of the blogger approval system.

    Like

    Rico Swaff recently posted The Top 10 Strangest Google Searches that Led People to The Chronicles of Rico in April 2011.

  126. 129
    superJennifer

    i understand your comment pain. i’ve learned to “Select All”, “Copy” and THEN hit the “Submit” button in case something like that happens, I can just paste my comment right back into the empty white box & show that server who’s boss!

    Like

  127. If you have a problem with losing your comments, then install Lazarus (available for Firefox and Chrome) as it saves what you write as you write it in case you back button or the browser crashes or whatever.

    I know I sound like an ad for it, but it’s saved my ass while RPing on LJ more than once. (Yes, I am a loser). Hope this helps =)

    Like

  128. It’s such a bummer that commenting on blogs can be such a freakin chore. I now, after losing butt-loads of comments after clicking back or even submit, copy first because I just can’t seem to master the whole commenting thing. I also like to to use this as an excuse why I don’t get comments on a post. I like to pretend lots of people commented but somehow they got lost and blame my website dude.

    Like

    Joyce Cherrier recently posted 5 Healthy Vacation Tips for Your Heart- No Exercise Required.

  129. I know this post is old, i’ve been going back reading your blog while i waste away the last remaining minutes of this all to long short work week. That being said, i think you need to install a key logger onto your computer. Then you can see everything that was ever typed! Could make for some interesting discoveries😉

    Like

    Rebecca S recently posted Merging Social, Content and SEO Strategies – Why It Matters.

  130. I have to leave a comment to this. I don’t have anything witty to say, but recently a question crossed my desk about where reindeer poop goes and I would love your insight… as a group we think it might dissolve into wishes, but we can’t be sure.

    PS – I have spent the last 6 hours reading your blog… I am a little anxious, happy and wondering about the zombies. Thanks!

    Like

    Melanie recently posted Another NO fitness day..

  131. Apparently my work doesn’t find that this is safe for work because as much as I really really really want to read it, it keeps getting blocked by our filter as “Adult”. Uhhh, yeah, it’s adult and last time I checked so was everyone else in the office. Just sayin’

    Like

    Trina recently posted Vision of My Daughter Dating.

  132. Someone, somewhere, in a dank room creates those robot-racist squiggly words. Every other one is a combination of two randoms: cowpistol, saberstorm, herpesleeve. I want that job.

    Like

  133. I am doing the same – I write much more comment than I get back.

    Like

    Vi recently posted Incredible thieves in India.

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