It’s hard to rattle Texans.

After I found my missing cat last week, I took down the have-you-seen-this-cat sign that I’d pinned on the neighborhood message board.  The space looked bare so I replaced it with another bulletin, which I expected would be trashed immediately.  I was wrong.

The bulletin board today:

“This is why it’s important to put collars on all of your pets.”  Awesome.

And that’s why I love my neighborhood.

 

287 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Just perfect. In every way.

    Like

    Knighton recently posted Simple Life Chardonnay (California 2009).

  2. Your neighbors are WAY COOLER than mine.

    Like

    Carri recently posted They Walk Among Us.

  3. That’s brilliant.

    Like

  4. I need to fucking move to Texas. Wait a minute…no I don’t…

    Like

    Vinobaby recently posted Wordless Wino Wednesday: Christmas in September?.

  5. Large snakes make great housepets if you don’t mind being digested.

    I don’t, so my snakes and I get along great.

    Like

    Rev. Back It On Up 13 recently posted Dear Derek Jeter: Please Have Sex With My Grandma.

  6. Of course your neighborhood is like this. Of course. I want to be your neighbor.

    Like

    Sherry Carr-Smith recently posted Mighty Job Hunter!.

  7. Wow! In New York, we only have missing cockroaches. And rats. Now I feel deprived. ):

    Like

    WriteWendy recently posted Notes from the Verge.

  8. I can relate to the rattle snake. I’m a little “bitey” today, too.

    Like

    @rdweatherly recently posted Lessons from Mr. Brown's 8th grade history class, Part 1.

  9. I want to live there.

    Like

    JulieT recently posted Germs should be bigger..

  10. This makes free chicken fingers pale in comparison…

    Like

    Mrs. Mustache recently posted I’m Addicted To Retro Cartoons AKA Ones That Include Gratuitous Coyote Violence.

  11. Dude. Your neighbors are the best. Can I move in with you? I’m moving in with you.

    Like

  12. Oh, this makes me very happy. You seem to live among your people.

    My neighbors turned on their heels in my driveway and left ON HALLOWEEN because of our Obama sign in 2008. I kind of hate our neighborhood. We had good candy, too. IT’S UNAMERICAN TO TURN DOWN CANDY.

    Like

  13. Bitey. Excellent. Is this how you are planning your death by rattlesnake?!

    Like

    John B recently posted blame tv.

  14. This is beyond awesome.

    Like

    Becca recently posted Don't Drink and Tweet.

  15. ROFL! I think there is an card in our Bolderdash game that has the right answer of “snakes, wearing respirators, on a treadmill”. The visual of a collar on a rattler, though I find it terrifying, makes me laugh… No wonder it’s “VERY ANGRY”

    Like

    Normally_Insane recently posted I don't have a problem....

  16. Haha awesome.

    Like

    Katie Bennett recently posted You can’t fix stupid..

  17. BAhahaha! could they really be serious?? Please tell me you posted an equally hilarious response…

    Like

  18. Oh, that’s my rattlesnake! Sorry. And his name is Ignacious.

    Like

    Mrs. Wonder recently posted All my SoCal ladies.

  19. Wonder if this will work in my neighborhood. Going to try it and let you know.🙂

    Like

  20. As someone living in Texas, I’m not surprised by this. Texans are unlike anyone else.

    Like

  21. If you’ve never been to the rattlesnake roundup in Sweetwater, Texas, that’s probably why you never died from a rattlesnake bite. But seriously, you should go there. To the roundup. Unless you are scared of millions of venomous snakes. Or prone to dying from their bites. Other than that, it’s a great day out with the kids and paramedics. Oh, and they taste like chicken. Wrapped around a scorpion.

    Like

    hogsatemysister recently posted Okie DNA Downunder.

  22. Haha! “Very bitey” I love this. Thanks for making me smile.🙂

    Like

    Sage recently posted Singing in the Non-Rain.

  23. I feel like there is a great TShirt idea lurking behind the comment ” This is why it’s important to put collars on your pets” but can’t quite visualize what the picture would be to go with that caption … unless maybe Copernicus strangling something?

    Like

  24. Your neighborhood rocks.

    Like

    Smedette recently posted Tour of Accents: Part II.

  25. Silly Bloggess, you didn’t check the snake’s collar! It will be easy to get him home now🙂 Or maybe micro chips are more in use with the reptilian kind…

    Like

    Gina recently posted Welcome to the neighborhood, we don't like you already.

  26. You should microchip, too. But, microchipping a rattle snake from a bad home may have dire consequences. And, sometimes, if rattlesnakes come from a bad home, it’s a good thing they don’t have collars on because when someone responds to the found flyer, you have the option of saying that you don’t think the rattlesnake you found is their rattlesnake. I’ve only rescued dogs and cats, but I’m pretty sure it all works the same for rattlesnakes. This is also what happens when you let your rattlesnakes off-leash.

    Like

    Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd recently posted Sometimes my “Imagination” is Staggering.

  27. I think you need to empower the rattlesnake instead of just calling it “bitey” lmao.

    Like

    MommaCupcake recently posted Noshstalgia: Fun Food From the 80's and 90's.

  28. Your part of Texas is way more fun than my part of Texas. No fair. I’m telling the husband tonight we are moving.

    Like

    Lacey recently posted 14 Weeks Left On This Crazy Train.

  29. I would totally live in Texas if it was in Canada

    Like

  30. This proves my theory that just because someone has a big hat or big hair doesn’t mean they can’t be witty. Nicely done, random Texan.

    Like

    Team Suzanne recently posted Clumsy birds, dead birds and GNR.

  31. That smacks of Austin.😉

    Like

  32. Love it! “This is why it’s important to put collars on all your pets.” Especially the “bitey” ones🙂

    Like

  33. For about a month on the lamppost across from my house there was a sigh that read “Found Doberman with a number to call. Under that sign was that read “Lost Doberman” with a picture of a Doberman on it with a number on it to call. Now I really want to give these people the benefit of the doubt, but I still think that the second people where like “Damn if we went to Kinkos and we are putting these signs up.” the signs stayed up until we got a good rain. It was during the summer and I live in south central Texas. It drove me crazy for a long time.

    Like

  34. I just want you to know that my bff is throwing me a Beyonce themed party next weekend. She is building a cardboard replica (to scale) for photograph purposes. There will be pictures. and dino shaped chicken nuggets to eat.

    Like

  35. Well, it’s no fucking wonder he’s angry and bitey. I’d be angry and bitey, too, if someone named me “Tiberios”. Or “Tiberius”.

    Like

    Jami recently posted Sharing is caring.

  36. I totally pictured one of those foam snakes you can get at carnivals that are attached to a metal coat hangers and you can walk around making them wiggle. But that would probably just piss the snake off even more. Its too hot to go for walks in Texas.

    Like

  37. A collar on a rattlesnake is mean. Seriously, how could he eat?

    Like

  38. Please please please put up an ad that says “for sale: rattlesnake harnesses (awesome rock band name if anyone is starting one btw)

    Like

    addgirl recently posted Recipe- Spinach Pasta (easy and yumtastic) no special equipment needed.

  39. you have the handwriting of a serial killer. or someone who lost their cat for awhile. you decide.

    Like

    Mary recently posted Venice Ristorante & Winebar.

  40. I don’t know any of my neighbours (I’m the antisocial type) and usually the only thing missing around here are dogs and cats, but one time on my way in to work I was stopped by a whole herd of horses blocking the road!

    Like

  41. Tiberious is doing time in Huntsville. They caught him in my neighborhood selling snake oil!

    Like

    SisterMerryHellish recently posted It’s The Ball Bearings, Isn’t It?.

  42. “Tiberios”? What kind of name is that, besides one for a breakfast cereal made from oats sifted in the Tiber river?

    You’re hilarious. My jokes are not.

    Like

    Brian recently posted I would title this dream, but really I have no idea where to even start..

  43. That’s just freakin awesome!

    Like

    Trish recently posted My Best Friend.

  44. Next note: “Rattlesnakes slither out of collars. Better staple it on next time.”

    Like

    Zannah recently posted Dude, like, yoga is totally awesome.

  45. My uncle used to have some snakes and he would take them for walks down the street….he just held onto their tail and let them slither ahead of him.

    But that was in CA. Maybe he was originally from TX….I could totally see that happening here.

    @Kande – made me think of a totally awesome Halloween costume for like a dog or something…..a Copernicus that attaches to the collar…maybe with a sign with the unfinished strangle caption on it…..

    I need to find a dog to borrow…..

    Like

    Brandina recently posted 15 Day Challenge: Day 9.

  46. Actually, they tried to serve me rattlesnake sausage Monday night at Rodizio Grill Brazilian Steakhouse. Tell this story to Tiberios, you know, as an object lesson about being less bitey.

    Like

    Mary recently posted Venice Ristorante & Winebar.

  47. i have nothing funny to say because the only thing i can think of is…if there were rattlesnakes getting loose ANYWHERE i live, i’d move. i’m just saying.

    Like

  48. It’s like you’re always in the right place at the right time.

    Like

  49. If found, go ahead and keep him. He was an asshole anyway.

    Like

    Julie recently posted How to scare your child into acting right.

  50. BAWAHAHA!! Now that IS hilarious! You obviously have readers in the neighborhood….I mean, how else would someone know to put such an awesome response on the poster? I heart your neighbors.

    Like

    Balanced Idjit recently posted I'm completely sane. Until you put me in the kitchen..

  51. You need to do more of these!

    Jenna
    callherhappy.com

    Like

    Jenna@CallHerHappy recently posted Book Review Roundup.

  52. Instead of a collar, I think the snake should be tatooed. My collie can get out of a collar, so a snake would have no problem. But a belly tatoo would be perfect! Just flip that puppy over and call the owner.

    Like

    Jill recently posted Guilt.

  53. The assholes that run our POA would probably throw us out for posting something like this… which makes me want to do it even more.
    Oh, and if the snake answers to “Hrothgar” then I know who he belongs to…

    Like

  54. You’re my neighbor, aren’t you? Crap, I knew I needed to move from this trailer park😉

    Like

  55. I can’t see that going over well in my hood. These people are a bit uppity. And we don’t have rattlesnakes naturally. So I could see this causing a very interesting panic.

    Fuck it. I think I am putting this sign up on our complex bulletin board.

    Like

    Amanda recently posted It's Just Emotion... Taking Me Over.

  56. Oh, that’s just funny. Our neighborhood doesn’t even HAVE a bulletin board. Living in the country will cause that.

    Like

    Sarah B. recently posted Fun with Felines.

  57. Oh man, this weekend my hubby and I saw a sign (on Long Island) that said “FOUND: WILD TURKEY…HIGHLY DOMESTICATED.” But there was only one copy. We didn’t want to take it and prevent the guy from finding his proper home (hopefully not someone’s thanksgiving table).

    Like

  58. If that sign appeared in my neighborhood everyone would lock up their children and we’d have an emergency block watch meeting called. And no, block watch is not a euphemism for hey grownups…let’s all get drunk without our kids being around.

    Like

    MyMansBelly recently posted How to Make Fig and Port Grainy Mustard.

  59. This ‘Found Rattlesnake’ sign is going to become like the chicken isn’t it? Rattlesnakes signs everywhere. Better yet, five foot, metal rattle snake signs.

    Like

    lisa daria recently posted #856 To the Point.

  60. Are you sure you don’t have multiple personalities? That bulletin board looks like a conversation you might be capable of having with yourself after a few wine slushies.

    Like

    Redneck Hillbillies recently posted Kiss my Redneck *censored*!!.

  61. And there I have been thinking that Texans were the sanest of American states, but you are all bloody nutters…. more of the same please!

    Like

  62. Exactly what your store was missing … snake collars! Genius !

    Like

    Gina aka Slappy recently posted Winky Kitty Face.

  63. It’s a TRULY wonderful day in the neighborhood. *claps*

    Like

  64. I believe that’s what they call “handling a situation with aplomb”.

    Brilliant – thanks for sharing!

    Like

  65. Very “bitey” isn’t so bad… now, if he was having a “hissy fit” that would be a completely different story…

    Like

    The Hubby Diaries recently posted Inside Every Man Is A Little Boy!.

  66. Everyone k

    Like

  67. How do you tell an angry rattlesnake from a pretty chill rattlesnake? Just curious…

    Like

    Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up) recently posted Go ahead, amuse me.

  68. 70
    Psychodynamom

    Animals without shoulders cannot be considered pets. Shoulders are necessary.

    Like

  69. Well of course someone would be mourning the loss of their pet, Ouchy Bleedy. He’s very cuddly when never touched or disturbed, and he does make that charming purring noise.

    Like

    Tazer Warrior Princess recently posted Reasons I’ll Probably End Up Being a Crazy Cat Lady.

  70. That’s it. I need to move.

    Like

  71. That went poorly. That was gonna be a Startrek joke but now I sound like Wang Chung minus the Wang and the Chung and the Tonight.

    Like

  72. Why do i not live where you live You are so awesome i❤ u

    Like

  73. As an animal rescuer I cannot tell you how angry it makes me when people don’t ID their pets. I mean a collar and ID tag is soooo easy and won’t cost more than $10! A lifetime microchip can be bought for $20 and there are no fees to update your information when you move or get a new phone number. If this person had chipped their Rattlesnake you wouldn’t be inconvenienced by trapping and providing dinner for a week until the dead beat shows up.

    Like

  74. Another reason why I’ll never leave Texas…

    Like

  75. You live in an area perfect for you. But if I lived in an area where rattlers just wandered aimlessly, due to irresponsible pet owners? I’d LOSE MY SHIT.

    Like

    Anna Nonamus recently posted Minion 1 and her Vaccination Adventure.

  76. Wait! All is not lost! http://www.alibaba.com/product-gs/349418665/Snake_Collar.html

    AND…you can get up to 150,000 pieces per month!

    Like

    Susie recently posted The last day of my 30s blog.

  77. I love it when people have no idea what they are talking about.

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    Ashley recently posted Oh well, whatever, nevermind..

  78. Honey badger could put the hurt on that snake. Honey badger don’t care.

    Like

    Jen recently posted I Think I Might Be Retarded.

  79. How awesome is this? My neighbors are definitely not as cool.

    Like

  80. Bitey🙂 Ok, but the way to solve the snake collar issue is simple, get some of that sticky velcro stuff and put it around the snake’s neck then velcro the collar as well, and viola` you have a snake in a collar that’s not going to come off if you use a good strength of velcro…yep I’m at work…yep this was way more interesting that what I should be doing…

    Like

  81. Man. I need funner neighbors.

    Like

    Becky recently posted Uttered Nonsense.

  82. Wow, you actually still have physical bulletin board, made out of…um…hemp looks like. Ooookay. We have a neighborhood List Serve. Neighbors are great but I don’t know how they would react to laying on a little snark, plus you would leave an obvious source ID. Anyway, I just loved the “dialogue”.

    Like

    JimTarrant recently posted Perry as Mr. Ridiculous.

  83. Awesome! It must be so refreshing to know that everyone is just as crazy as you! I love you!

    Like

  84. It’s like you just attract all of the fun people. Could you please share some with the rest of us?

    Like

    thehaughtylibrarian recently posted This should just be common sense, alas.

  85. Your neighbors are awesome. Mine are dicks. Can I move in with you? I am an excellent babysitter/cook. Just saying.

    Like

    Cassie recently posted too much coffee, weirdness, and a creeper.

  86. @Lynn MacDonald (All Fooked Up) – the pretty chill ones don’t bite you.

    Like

  87. One time when I was young and living at home (in small town North Texas) we got a note in our mailbox from an anonymous neighbor about our cat. (She was an outdoor cat – that’s what you do in small towns in TX when it’s basically the country) It read, “I let your cat in. She is very hungry and lonely”. Well duh, if you’re going to open your door and offer the cat food, she’s going to come in! Ever since then, we combine this note and the Kim Jong Il song from Team America together. “That cat is so roooooneryyyyyy!”

    Like

  88. My neighbors are pretty cool…but not THAT cool!

    Like

    Taren recently posted My baby is cuter than ANY other baby.

  89. Part of me wants to say, “Now, why can’t I live in Texas?” The rest of me just doesn’t.

    Like

    Stephanie recently posted Not Fat: A Guest Post By Desi Valentine.

  90. Ooh. Found an ACTUAL snake collar! http://www.patentgenius.com/patent/6490999.html But I don’t think rattlesnakes like to be collared. Especially the angry ones.

    Like

    Susie recently posted The last day of my 30s blog.

  91. Love It!

    Someone recently put up fliers in the elevators in our condo building that said “FOUND Large Parrot, Am Keeping, Have renamed Bruce, But seriously if this is your parrot call Ryan.” My husband’s name is also Ryan. So now everyone thinks we put up the sign and I totally fine with that.

    Like

    Lauren recently posted What is this TAN color you speak of?.

  92. You neighbors are Phenom. This is why Texas is the best. Except my neighbors who don’t have any southern hospitality. And I actively avoid because they are rude and or creepy and or obnoxious with the stupid train model they built that they enjoy very much to blare the horn of. Constantly

    Like

    Nikki recently posted This will make me no friends im sure..

  93. That. Is. Awesome.
    Haha!

    Like

    Kelly recently posted Happy National Coffee Day!.

  94. Bahahahahaha!

    I would call up and go all viral video on the guy who found the snake. “Snaaaaaaaaaaake! Snakey snake!” =)

    Like

    Jenn L @ Peas and Crayons recently posted Happy National Coffee Day from P&C + So Delicious! [Giveaway Time!].

  95. That is awesome.

    Like

    Holly Ruggiero recently posted Ut oh, look who's got a twitter account!.

  96. 98
    monkeyboymama

    Freaking hilarious! Just another day in da hood!

    Lo-Jack that “Very Bitey” thang!

    Like

  97. Your neighbors are so cool. Mine covered our mailboxes in BBQ sauce yesterday.

    Like

  98. OMG!! I just had the mental picture of a rattle snake crawling around with it’s collar and bell!! Thanks I needed that laugh today.

    Like

  99. OMFG that is EPIC.

    Like

    Mistress Arawynn recently posted Time sure does fly….

  100. I would pay to watch someone put collars on rattlesnakes.
    Not a lot mind you, but something.
    Probably in paperclips – I have a lot of those.

    Like

    cursingmama recently posted Cats & Cradles ~ Tequila & Strippers.

  101. Now I want a rattlesnake with a collar. I’d totally bling it out with diamonds because I think some snakes want to feel pretty, too.

    Like

    Phoenix Rising recently posted Bullies thrive wherever authority is weak..

  102. A very bitey rattlesnake sounds totally legit in Texas. If that sign were in West Virginia it would read found: half man half sheep half cousin twice removed.

    Like

    paula @ thewilyweez recently posted I Would Be A Terrible D.A.R.E Spokeswoman.

  103. There is hope for the world…yet

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    Possum recently posted me, myself and I.

  104. LOL – Now I feel compelled to put up a “lost rattlesnake sign” anonymously at the complex where I live… where everyone has small dogs and cats…. I think I’ll include a picture of a very large snake in an aquarium to make it look realistic…. and if my neighbors ask me about it, I’ll just shrug it off and say, “Yeah, I thought I heard something yesterday in the bushes”

    Like

    Nicole recently posted Life.

  105. If this was in MY neighborhood in Kentucky….the cops would be coming door to door for handwriting samples…NO ONE wants to have fun anymore.
    And to person that said to *staple* the collar to the snake….I just bought a front row ticket.

    Like

  106. Tiberios may have gone on the lam from Central Florida. A couple of people got bitten this week and authorities can’t find the suspect. Ask him about his whereabouts on the night of the 27th.

    Like

  107. I think a last possible response to that would be, “This is why we cant have nice things…”

    +1 on paying with paper clips
    +1 on I would live in Texas if it was in Canada😛

    Like

  108. And those collars should have your husband’s phone number on them, so if they get sqished, he gets the bad news first.

    Like

  109. Um your neighborhood is awesome. I would probably get in trouble for littering or something if I tried to put a sign up.

    Like

    Marta recently posted If I Didn’t Work.

  110. my sister just moved to texas and hates it. i’m thinking this note might just change her mind.

    Like

  111. Love. It! Us Texans are pretty dang funny.

    Like

    Christina (@C_Linnell) recently posted Is it Fall yet?.

  112. Honey, you’re home!

    Like

  113. I want to live in your neighborhood. I am also horribly tempted to copy you and put a sign like that up in our neighborhood, but my neighbors involve themselves with Serious Business like Golf and Wine Tastings and Being Republican. I don’t think they’d get it.

    (I wish I was joking. There are neighborhood wine tastings. Who the hell sets up a neighborhood wine tasting?!)

    Like

    Desertbell recently posted Mako Driving Soccer Mom.

  114. I think the best part is how neat the last bit of handwriting is. I keep imagining a very sensible person giving this advice.

    Like

  115. God Bless Texas.

    Like

    Julie McGuire recently posted This Time I Really Mean It..

  116. Of course, you would put a collar on a snake, harnesses don’t work so well

    Like

  117. Great sign and notes. Reminds me of my old pet snake “IBM”. He was a California king snake my cat caught, and his name was short for “It Bit Me”.

    Like

    Stephanie - Home with the Kids recently posted How Do You Check Out a Clickbank Vendor to See If Your Affiliate Commissions Are Likely to Leak?.

  118. And this is why I miss Texas.

    Like

  119. “May have come from bad home” – I beg to differ. Anyone who adopts a rattlesnake has got to have a heart of gold.

    Like

  120. It’s official. Worst comment leaver ever.

    Jesus.

    Like

    Miss Yvonne recently posted That Dog Is Running With Purpose.

  121. Awww, you make miss home. I’ve been trying to convince my husband to move back!

    Like

    Vesta Vayne recently posted Are you waiting for the Poop Bag Fairy, or what?.

  122. Who said that community noticeboards are dead and no one reads them?! I say poo to them – community notice boards are very much alive and interactive🙂

    Like

    Adriana_G recently posted My iPod has a Sick Sense of Humour.

  123. When did you move in?

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    tokenblogger recently posted I, for really and truly, ….

  124. Yes, collars and don’t forget to spay or neuter them!! Don’t want angry rattlesnakes taking over the earth!

    Like

  125. HA! I want to move to your neighborhood! You should recruit them and bring them into your cult (if you have one I mean…) You could worship large metal chickens. Just a thought.

    Like

    Angie recently posted Oh, you were serious? Sorry..

  126. Love this.🙂

    Like

    Kate recently posted Thursday things.

  127. THAT’S IT!!!! Texas heat and humidity be damned! I’m going to have to move back home!!! I need to be around people who “get” me!

    Like

    Gigi recently posted Flummoxed....or if GMAC is looking for a spokesperson, I'm available....

  128. 132
    Barefoot Liz

    The image of a snake with a collar makes me giggle. Especially a bling collar.

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    Barefoot Liz recently posted Hysterectomy Recovery Fundraiser.

  129. A snake with a collar makes me think of something you’d see in an adult store….

    Like

  130. Has he had his ‘dog vaccine’? My dogs just got their rattlesnake vaccine.

    Like

    Sandy recently posted Soapbox Time!.

  131. now you must google a photo of a rattlesnake with a collar on and post it with your sign.

    Like

    Jamie (tr0ubs) recently posted Wordless Wednesday :(.

  132. I came home and my dog had died today. He had been in my life for 14 years. I decided to check your blog and read some of your past posts. You made me laugh today. Then I read when Barnaby Jones died and I cried again. So thanks, thanks for always putting this fucked up life into perspective for me on this, the worst of days.

    Like

  133. can I borrow this idea for work? My passive aggressive lunchroom & bathroom notes aren’t getting ANY fucking attention. This just might.

    Like

    Sarcasm in Action recently posted I'm Way Too Lubed Up to Blog Coherently Right Now.

  134. I want to live in your rneighborhood.

    Like

    Susan Says... recently posted Me and Mr. Jones.

  135. Found: One dog. I taught her to answer to the name Klondike. Come get her if you want her to answer to her original name.

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    Lorca Damon recently posted I Take Life Advice from Snack Foods.

  136. Fucking amazing. I’m sad they didn’t take a photo of the rattlesnake being bitey. Also, you know some fucking old person wrote the shit about the collars, cuz he wrote it in ‘old people handwriting’. Fucker was probably serious, too.

    Like

    Charity recently posted There’s been a pen heist..

  137. What if instead of a collar, you fused two pringles cans together, cut a hole in the top (so the snake could breathe/take in the view) and tied a string to the end?

    With your ingenuity, you might be able to turn this idea into a cash cow-er, cobra!

    Like

    bschooled recently posted Hooked On A Feeling.

  138. “Very bitey” That made me ROFL.

    Like

  139. I have just read all these comments and I can only think what strange people you American’s are…nice strange, strange strange…… definitely strange. I think the sign is so amusing but the image of any ‘bitey snake ‘ leaves me very cold and shaky! Even wearing a bling collar. I am getting such a visual on Texas………

    Like

    Susan Hogan recently posted Dashed off Dasher.

  140. I love it!!!!

    Like

    Brenna recently posted This ought to be fun!.

  141. I found a baby tarantula today (I’m in TX, too!). I think I’ll try this in our neighborhood. Hmmm…very leggy? S/he sort of waves the front ones around when you talk to her/him.

    Like

  142. Oh! And have you seen the tarantulas out in west Texas (out by Weatherford and beyond) that live with the little spadefoot toads? The toads eat ants that would otherwise eat the spider, and in return the spider protects the toads. I’ve actually seen this, although disappointingly not in actual battle mode. True story.

    Like

  143. I want to move to your neighborhood!

    Like

    Brianne recently posted Pinning! Like Winning but with Pinterest.

  144. I have all my rattlesnakes spayed and neutered.

    Like

  145. “Very Bitey” is totally your next t-shirt.

    Like

  146. 150
    Calamity Wren

    That’s Ah-mazing! I wish my neighborhood was even a tenth as cool as yours!🙂

    Like

  147. I love my neighborhood because my bestie lives a few houses down and we have martini nights as often as possible, but I do believe that your neighborhood is way cooler than mine! Can I be your neighbor?

    Like

  148. Signs like that remind me that some people aren’t as much the turds I usually give them credit for being…

    Like

    Maura @evewaspartiallyright.blogspot.com recently posted Better Oats Raw Multigrain Hot Cereals.

  149. I saw one of my neighbors taking his pet python for a walk once. This would have been cooler if it had involved a collar and leash, but he was just wearing the snake like a bracelet. It was still freaky, though.

    Like

  150. See? When you live in a state where they execute the retarded, the average IQ can only go up!

    Like

    DogsOnDrugs.com recently posted This… This Explains A Lot, Actually.

  151. HAHAHAHA!!! That is made of awesome.

    Like

  152. I’m going to add “see a snake wearing a collar” to my bucket list.

    Like

    k-dawg recently posted Bitch, Please: How K-Dawg Got Her Groove Back #whitegirlproblems.

  153. It’s not mine. Mine has a mustache.

    Like

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  154. Since when did people start writing in cursive again? I thought that was outlawed.

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    ErikaMarie recently posted My Photography.

  155. I’d like to see how you keep a collar on a rattlesnake. I mean, wouldn’t it just keep wriggling out of it????

    Like

    carolyn recently posted This is How I Amuse Myself.

  156. I think it would be more of a Snake Harness than a Collar per se and he’s a bitey rattlesnake because his obviously Faux Geek owner named him Tiberius and MISSPELLED IT. Any good Geek owner can spell it correctly. It’s the “T” in James T. Kirk after all…

    Like

  157. That is awesome!!

    Like

    AmazingGreis recently posted 9/11/2001 – 10 Years Later – I Remember….

  158. Apparently you live in the Land of Awesome.

    Like

    Stacey recently posted Northern Light.

  159. See, up north we just hack their heads off and hang them off the fence (well, my grandpa did, anyway). We just aren’t cool enough to keep them as pets….so sad.

    Like

    eosaja recently posted Free Verse.

  160. Hilarious. Funny story: My brother had a Nile Monitor when I was little, he was about oh… 3 to 4 feet long. And mean as a mother fucker. One whip of his tail could break your arm. Yeah, he was strong. Anyway, he got out of his cage once.. and my brother lived in a basement with a door to the outside. Apparently that door was open and he got out. We went to our local pet store like two days later and found a found sign with a picture of the lizard and what not. Needless to say, we were all to embarassed to admit that we had lost a 4 foot lizard that was potientally dangerous and never went to retrieve him.

    Like

    Mandy recently posted Awesome Mother Fuckers.

  161. Haha, I literally wandered over to your blog from Pinterest where I JUST saw this posted and laughed about it. And then here it was, the original. I should have known it would be someone as cool as you who started this.

    Like

  162. That’s definitely something that I miss about Texas…they know how to take a joke and run with it. Koreans…not so much.

    Like

    Jaclynap recently posted My First Real Date with a Korean.

  163. Wait…you have a neighborhood message board?
    I can’t even comprehend this.

    Like

    Rai recently posted A sad tale of animal crackers.

  164. I lived in Texas for 2 years, and without question the people there fell into only two categories for me.

    1. They were sweet, wonderful, kind-hearted, honest, hard-working, generous people.
    2. They were hate-filled, angry, deceitful, manipulative, psychopathic, evil people (Potentially a result of neuro-toxic outages in the brain, caused by the toxic water and fumes in the air – from all that damn fracking.)

    Sadly, the latter won out with the majority of those I came across, and I left town without looking back. I suspect more than the fair share of Texans masquerade as rattlesnakes and thus their lack of shock with your sign.

    They do have some great Mexican food though, I’ll give them that.

    Like

    Karyn Pyle recently posted Torching Me Seems A Little Excessive.

  165. I’m shocked that people were so rad to you … I’m jealous of your neighborhood!

    Like

    Jaime recently posted Wordless Wednesday.

  166. http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.1328680650474.2042899.1034673320#!/photo.php?fbid=1178523936650&set=a.1328680650474.2042899.1034673320&type=1&theater

    No clue if you can get to that…it’s in my FB pics and I am total moron when it comes to this link stuff.

    Anyway…even though I’m sure it has to be a joke, I swear I pee’d a little when I read it.

    Then again when I read it again.

    If you can’t get to it…I’m ridiculously sorry. It is so worth the pee though.

    Like

    Carrie - A Sassy Redhead recently posted Sweet Mother…this is better than a new bra!.

  167. I have no freaking idea what this poem means but it has the name Victor in it so thought that perhaps if you’ve had a few of your wine-slushees tonight it might mean something to you…

    snakepit
    when you find yourself
    inside a snake pit
    you can not just be naive
    to be bitten and even
    swallowed by another
    snake
    you become a snake
    yourself and bite
    as many as you can

    this is the law of the
    survival of the fittest snake
    and when you emerge
    as the victor

    go back to your form
    coy dove, white feathers,
    lovely beak
    gentle claws

    RIC Z. BASTASA

    Like

    Jamie Veraldi recently posted They Call Me MacGyver.

  168. Things like this make me actually love people.

    Like

  169. I love how not only does the first commenter leave a comment… but leaves space on his paper for future commentary. I too would love that neighborhood!!

    Like

  170. First of all… That is awesome.
    Secondly, Not only is it important to keep your rattle snakes and other angry pets collared (ie: bears, wombats, badgers, ex husbands, male goats, and children), but PLEASE!!!!! Spay and Neuter your your pets. Otherwise you will end up with the A holes that I have to deal with on a daily basis that are destined to end up on peopleofwalmart.com!

    Like

    Jennie A recently posted Food Saver deal.

  171. OK I don’t have time to follow this blog all the time, but in my perfect world, I would! I adore you in all manner of ways and when you lost your cat last week I was totally beside myself.

    We were moving while Rolly was missing and my S.O. (B.) can attest to the fact that the whole incident left me utterly paranoid. “Leave the door open one more time, muthafucker! If Adred gets out I’m not moving ANYWHERE tonight!” Tough day, on many fronts…especially for the man holding all the boxes.

    I’m thrilled to hear your Rolly is safe and totally understand the terror of that experience.

    Much love, for all you do.

    Like

    Jenny recently posted Ethical Pricing and Food on Your Face.

  172. The people in your neighbourhood know it’s you leaving this message.
    Just saying.
    PS – I read all this to my husband, who is now banning my evening wine (or two) and insisting I get a job.
    I blame you.So there
    XXXOOO

    Like

  173. Excellent advice! The next time I have an angry pet rattlesnake, I’ll be sure to put a collar on it. I hope it doesn’t slither out of it though! Even if it stayed on, I wonder who would be willing to read the tag if the angry rattlesnake ever ran away from home?

    Dilemma!

    Like

    Cheryl D. recently posted Xtra Special Coffee.

  174. Oh, and a belated PS
    You introduced me to my best friend, blogging mate Susansays – because you said she had one of the best blog titles… and I looked… and was hooked….
    Susan and I will probably never meet – (it is 40 hours (!) transit time from my place to hers (and she HATES to fly), so it will probably never happen)
    BUT – that is ok, I love her anyway.
    AND – I love you. That is all.
    XXXOOO

    Like

  175. I’m still fixated on the name. In no way, if I came across that sign, could I be THAT witty.

    Like

  176. the only thing I have found on my street is a two year old on one of those plastic bikes…ALONE…I called the police and they were all “well nobody has reported a missing 2 year old can you hang onto him and we’ll see if we can send someone out oh they’ll be a while..”
    It’s not a dog people, it’s a 2 year old human being. They can be really hard to get and the kids parents will probably want him back. So we stood on the side of the street in front of my house waiting for the police who never turned up but his rather frantic uncle did after a while. Kid was from 3 blocks away he’d climbed out the bedroom window and done a runner on his bike. AND YOU CAN’T PUT A COLLAR ON ONE OF THOSE with belongs to careless parents of LaLa Street… and you totally should be allowed to put “If found wandering please return to …” on a t shirt or something for little kids and old people with dementia.

    Like

    Peta recently posted The Devil is in the Detail and DNA gets you everytime..

  177. Horrified by the missing rattler, but the neighbors seem grand!

    Like

    Dan recently posted Fun with Magnetism.

  178. I want to live in Texas. I want to live in your neighborhood. Can I stay at your house while I’m looking for my own digs?

    Like

    wagthedad recently posted Sexual Advice For Straight Men Rule #2.

  179. Hahahaha. Never seen such stuff in my life. And Tiberios, really??? Whats your neighborhood btw???;-)

    Like

    laila recently posted Physical Therapy Assistant.

  180. Excellent advice. I wonder if I should put a collar on my not so bitey but often kicky child? I’m sure no one would object.

    Like

    Penbleth recently posted A different sort of pattern – then splat..

  181. LOL! All bulletin boards should have postings like this🙂

    Like

  182. I see heaps of adults with collars on so why not put one on a kid or an old person. Why should only pets get returned…. Although considering my kids ????…. No they always find their way home so collars it is.

    Like

    Peta recently posted Stitched Up.

  183. It’s good that you took him in before the snake catcher found him. He could have ended up in the snake pound, and when the owners went to get him, they’d have to pay a big fine, especially if he’s not current on his rabies shots. By the way, are you sure he wasn’t rabid? Because that could be really dangerous.

    If the owner never claims him, you should mail him to your enemies. Just be sure to use an approved shipping container–I’m sure Google will be helpful here.

    Like

    Brian the Kwyjibo recently posted Dancing Robots and Toilet Water.

  184. 188
    David Galiel

    Well, there is a reason Samuel L. Jackson did NOT sign on for a movie in which his script would include the line, “Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking giant metal chickens on this motherfucking stoop!”.

    (Although “Giant Metal Chickens on A Stoop” would be an awesome title for a movie).

    (Also, contrary to rumor, the original screenplay of formerly titled Rakers of the Lost Litter Box did NOT have Harrison Ford’s character exclaiming, “Kittehs! Why did it have to be Kittehs!”

    It’s SNAKES, people. SNAKES. With BABY RATTLES, for crying out loud. Nature’s Pied Piper.
    You try putting a leash on it. Or a bird.

    Like

  185. I want to live in your neighborhood. My neighbors post notes sometimes, but they are all in Danish so I cannot read them. I bet they aren’t amusing though. Danes seldom are.. /le sigh

    Like

    _CoreyGirl_ recently posted IMH – STP – Creep.

  186. I suspect a collar would slide right off your bitey snake. Perhaps you should have the vet install a tracking device under its skin; then all you have to do is prevent it from shedding.

    Like

    Lynn from For Love or Funny recently posted Butterflies are stupid..

  187. I just moved here from AZ… Texas just got another cool point in my book. I think I’m gonna like it here.

    Like

    Sharon recently posted In honor of Oktoberfest 2011.

  188. Well if you could get rid of the bitey parts (and maybe the parts that strangle? Do those snakes do that? I’m from the northeast, I have no idea, and this being the internet there’s obviously no way for me to look that up) it seems to me that a rattlesnake is just a baby’s toy waiting to happen.

    Like

    Katie recently posted In Which I Read the News, and Tell You the Good Parts.

  189. Texans rock!! And, I can say that because I am one!

    That is all…except, Texans ROCK!!

    Like

    awesomesauciness recently posted Baaad Bromance.

  190. I’m concerned that your neighborhood has a message board. Are you sure you’re not accidentally living in an office kitchen?

    Like

    moooooog35 recently posted Who Says Romance is Dead? - Giant Dildo-Type-Thing Edition.

  191. I want a “very bitey” tee-shirt.

    Like

  192. You are clearly from the Inner Loop. I miss the Inner Loop. This degree of awesomeness doesn’t exist where I live now.

    Like

  193. I was crying when I read this because I was laughing so much.

    Like

  194. it seems to me that a rattlesnake is just a baby’s toy waiting to happen.Just be sure to use an approved shipping container–I’m sure Google will be helpful here.

    Like

    jewel recently posted Understanding Arizona Bankruptcy: What Debts are Discharged in Chapter 7 Bankruptcy?.

  195. Well obviously! Who just let’s a rattlesnake runaround without a collar?

    Like

    Natalie recently posted DIY Blog Critique eBook Review: How To Critique Your Blog Like A Professional.

  196. God Bless Mother Fucking Texas Y’all

    I love us.🙂

    Like

  197. I want a ‘Very Bitey’ t-shirt, too

    Like

    Charity recently posted Shit just got real.

  198. Heck, I’m moving to Texas.

    Like

    Irina recently posted Beauty of nature.

  199. GOD I love Texas.🙂

    Like

    Bookzilla recently posted Excerpts: Banned Books Edition.

  200. THAT should be submitted to Passive Aggressive Notes. While not necessarily passive-aggressive, it’s definitely hilarious.

    Like

  201. I bet they think it’s some sort of messaging system for a secret sex party. One with lots of drugs. What if you’re like, a pimp now? A pimp without even knowing it?

    Like

    tracey - justanothermommy recently posted I should be their Spokeperson. I really, really should..

  202. You and your neighbors make me proud to be a Texan.

    Like

    Zippy recently posted Fuck It..

  203. . . . unlike Gov. Goodhair . . .

    Like

    Zippy recently posted Fuck It..

  204. I didn’t realize people kept rattlesnakes as pets. I don’t know that I’ll be visiting Texas anytime soon. The last time I was there I was bit by a scorpion. What’s with the teeth down there??

    Like

  205. This makes me really happy.

    Like

    Dom recently posted Herbie Snuggles.

  206. I’m pretty sure rattlesnakes love being kept as pets. When they bite, and eat your dogs and children, it’s only because they are yearning for someone to love them.

    Like

    Rev. Back It On Up 13 recently posted Putting the 'No' in 'Nostalgia'.

  207. I live in texas and my neighborhood is not that awesome. well…i guess they could be awesome. I don’t have a neighborhood message board to test this on them. I should probably move.

    Like

    saraellenawesome recently posted The Versatile Blogger Award!.

  208. This sure beats the ‘Lost duck’ sign we used to have in our park.
    Btw, someone is showing off their fancy cursive skills in your ‘hood.

    Like

    TriGirl recently posted I Brought My "Eh" Game.

  209. See, I should have thought of that when we had a family of skunks in our window wells. Would have saved me tons to have the missing owners pick them up!

    Like

  210. just found your blog. freakin hilarious.
    can’t stop crying from laughing so hard.
    first the chicken post.
    now this.
    great style. can’t wait to read more!

    Like

    Sara recently posted Birthday Weekend.

  211. 216
    Unoriginal Pseudonym

    I love that I’m not the only one who uses ‘bitey’ as an adjective.

    Like

  212. “if you like it than you should have put a collar on it…”

    Like

  213. That’s the type of opportunity in which I would never have a pen. And I wouldn’t have The Boy with me, because he always has a pen (I could probably wake him up at 2 a.m. and ask for a pen and he’d hand me one. But where would he keep it? Hmmmm.). So then I’d have to decide if my wit was enough to make the effort to go back with a pen.

    Like

    Kitten Thunder's Girl recently posted All hail King Oliver.

  214. Spay or neuter your rattlesnake. They won’t be as prone to wander and hump the other neighborhood rattlesnakes.

    It’s called “Being a responsible pet owner.”

    Like

    Dani recently posted Best Facebook Post of the Week.

  215. Man, I need a better neighborhood. I bet that rattlesnake was angry because he was named Tiberios instead of Tiberius. I’ve renamed the snake Captain Kirk in my mind, to help make him less angry.

    Like

    Allison recently posted Happiness is a Yellow Leaf.

  216. I loved the title of this post.
    And it’s so true. We don’t rattle easily.

    Like

    Bodaciousboomer recently posted Adventures with Wanda Lamont #2.

  217. You would never see this in New York! I am originally from AZ and the sign from the neighbor would read will shoot for you! At least that is what my dad would leave.

    Like

  218. –>I would have added, “Responds to Snake and OH F*CK, IS THAT A SNAKE?”

    Like

    WebSavvyMom recently posted Random Thoughts.

  219. That is awesome. Covered in awesomesauce. With a side of awesome-ade.

    Like

    Jennifer recently posted There are rocks in my head..

  220. Hello there! I just wanted you to know that I officially started following your blog a few days ago – though I was introduced to you awhile back via the classic giant-metal-chicken-anniversary posting. Also wanted you to know that I mentioned your blog in my posting today. If you have a chance to read it, you’ll understand why I appreciate this site so much. I need a good dose of irreverent humor on an ongoing basis. Feeds my soul.

    Like

  221. This is beyond excellent. And just what I needed today.

    Like

    Janice recently posted How to pick up a girl, Tip #3.

  222. Oh, Jenny, you would like this site. http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

    Like

    Annadanna (from Canada) recently posted Happy birthday Hubby!.

  223. I’ve been thinking about this because I have that kind of time. You know, if he’s bitey, he might be angry because he bit himself. Think about it. It hurts like hell when you bite the inside of your mouth or your tongue or whatever and we don’t even have fangs. That makes me pretty angry. Plus he might have realized that he is a poisonous snake and just be scared shitless over will he live or die because I’m not sure rattlesnakes know they’re immune to their own venom.

    This cold medicine is awesome.

    Like

  224. DO SNAKES ANSWER TO THIER NAMES?!?!?

    HOW CAN YOU TELL?!?!

    Like

  225. LOVE THIS!!!! What more can I say.

    Like

  226. Clearly no one in Canada is working right.
    They are all posting comments on this blog…

    Ok, here’s one:

    How can you tell a snake is answering to his name?

    Does he –

    wait for it

    – wag his tail?

    Like

    Elle Persephone recently posted Vera's thing..

  227. 232
    Captain Heinybottom

    I wish I had it in me to laugh at this…. Alas, I am on Day 5 of an Anxiety poop storm waiting for everything to feel normal again. You would think getting a new dog..and not my first at that!..wouldnt be a big deal…but appearantly, either the dog or it just was a trigger for something that has been brewing. Alas, trust me.. i feel your pain about anxiety. Just unfortunately for me rather than little burps here and there… I get huge gushers when I make life changes!

    Like

  228. If people would have their snake spayed or neutered, they probably wouldn’t wander from home. Either way a collar may be difficult I propose a piercing on the back of his neck with a tag attached, like a belly ring with a dog tag. I think it would work.

    Like

    Michelle recently posted What’s your sign? And other pick up lines….

  229. I gave up having anything kind to say about rattlesnakes when my son posted a video of an Eastern Diamondback SWIMMING past his kayak. I did not know that rattlesnakes can SWIM! How nice it would be to have back the money I spent installing the fucking moat.

    Like

    Jonah Gibson recently posted Conversations with Bean: Sorting the Bitches.

  230. Hmm, so an “angry” snake is “very bitey.” Can we be sure that’s not what a “happy snake” is like, too?

    Like

    Jill recently posted Tattoo you? How? Who? Eh? Speak up!.

  231. OMG Did you really put up the rattlesnake sign??! LMAO Woman, you are too funny!

    And that some people wrote notes in reply means you are truly living among “your people”.

    Like

    Kernut the Blond recently posted I Found Zombies In A Ghost Town – The Apocalypse Beginneth.

  232. I found a large snake once.

    Then I found it again.

    And again.

    And again.

    And mom says that’s why I’m blind.

    Like

    Ed Adams recently posted Demotivational Posters: The SUPREME Edition..

  233. Ok, after thinking about it again, I’ve decided what I REALLY want is a COLLAR that reads, “I’m very bitey” and not a shirt.

    Winning.

    Like

    Charity recently posted Fridays Are For Fuckery.

  234. I’m using this post as a way to convince my husband that it’s okay to move to Texas.

    Like

  235. I’m bitey. I need a collar.

    Like

    GirltoMom- Heidi recently posted We Will Always Have Paris.

  236. FYI: I’m nominating you for the prestigious and highly coveted Versatile Blogger Award on Monday (which you can accept, or not…it’s completely up to you)! Congratulations! 😀

    Incidentally, my post (Food for Thought) will be live around 5am EST and I’ve linked to your site. Hope that was okay and that you’ll be somewhat flattered. 😉

    Thanks so much for writing so well (hence, the award)!

    Best,

    Planet Mom

    http://www.melindawentzel.com

    Like

    Melinda Wentzel recently posted Ode to Oblivion.

  237. This is the best lost and found sign EVER. Would you help me write my wedding vows?

    Like

    Karen Hawks recently posted Lazy River Wanted.

  238. Pffft. Someone should tell that stupid kid that rattlesnakes don’t wear collars.

    #stupidkidsareanepidemic

    #waithashtagsdontworkincommentssections

    Like

  239. #237 Ed – LOL…I’m fairly certain the missing snake has TWO eyes, or the poster would have said otherwise. I sure hope the snake you speak of is not angry and bitey. *shudder*

    Like

    Redneck Hillbillies recently posted Kiss my Redneck *censored*!!.

  240. Jen, I consulted one of those handwriting expert people types. It turns out you have the handwriting of a serial killer. I thought Victor should know. Then again, I assumed Copernicus clued him in.

    Like

    Gates recently posted We're gay, we have candles out the wazoo..

  241. I wonder what exactly constitutes a “bad home” for a rattlesnake. Hardcore vegans owners who fill their terrariums with ice?

    Like

    kate recently posted friday favourites 30.09.11.

  242. neighbors who know their roman emperors, and proper pet etiquette. stellar.

    Like

    Simone recently posted I may need a bigger bucket.

  243. That’s it. I’m moving. I want to live in your neighbourhood. Love it.

    Like

    Lisa recently posted I should go into PR... I quite enjoyed writing this post..

  244. hahahahahaha

    Like

  245. Wow. I knew I should have taken the job offer in Texas! That is awesome! Thanks for making my morning.

    Like

    Wendy recently posted How Do You Identify Yourself?.

  246. LOL, this is hilarious!

    Like

    Shan recently posted Like A Red Rubber Ball.

  247. That is the perfect neighborhood for you. How hilarious!

    Like

    Naked Girl in a Dress recently posted My Five Best Decisions in Life.

  248. this is indeed the best sign ever posted to the public

    Like

    Whitney Soup recently posted Stage 5 Is Acceptance.

  249. Here’s another sign for your neighborhood bulletin board.
    Missing: Old Crow, Needs Medication.

    Like

  250. SEE… I did try to get my cat to balance on my head. It didn’t turn out well…

    http://greenmonkeytales.blogspot.com/2011/10/me-and-my-ppd.html

    Like

  251. The only pet rattlesnake I ever had was so small that his collar was a wedding ring. Fit perfectly. Snake died the first winter. Still got the ring, though. Somewhere.

    Like

    Fred Miller recently posted Don’t Read This, nor My Archives.

  252. It was really nice of you to make the bulletin board more aesthetically pleasing by filling the empty space. And so awesome of your neighbors to contribute to the project. If every neighborhood cared as much as yours does…the world would be a better place.

    Like

    jacqui recently posted A Scary Proposition….

  253. Who doesn’t just love a ‘bitey’ rattlesnake?

    Like

  254. There are flashes of brilliance in our state, I’ll admit. This bulletin board conversation was a refreshing reminder of that.

    But collars aren’t going to work on a rattlesnake. Obviously. Microchipping is the answer here. It saves lives.

    Like

    Lisa recently posted On Humanity and Walmartians....

  255. Is your neighborhood by any chance named “The Gates”?!

    Like

    absence of alternatives recently posted Fly your freak flag high.

  256. And this is exactly why I love living in Texas!

    Like

  257. For years, my daughter has warned everyone when our cat, Milo, was in a “bitey mood.” We even talked to the vet about it and he just said Milo “likes to communicate with his mouth.” I stared at the man for an awkward amount of time and responded with “I do, too, but no one’s raw and bleeding when I’m done.”

    Which is usually true.

    Like

  258. tell us more about texas.

    Like

    Goradde recently posted I can haz Yamashita treasurez..

  259. Cool ‘hood…………….

    Like

    Bill Dorman recently posted Are you a writer?.

  260. My cats are “bitey.” According to the internet, those bites should be interpreted as “kisses.” The large rattlesnake must just be incredibly affectionate.
    Sweet.

    Like

    The Queer Next Door recently posted Everything Changed.

  261. 266
    Uber Lurker

    This just proves that my neighbors do SUCK!! Jealous. As. Hell.

    Like

  262. bloody brilliant. and its not a bad home. she’s impossible to please. i’ll be by to get her in an hour.

    Like

  263. I suspect Texans are the Queenslanders of the USA.
    Awesome.🙂
    BB

    Like

    BB recently posted Calendar polls begin.

  264. Sadly these things do not happen in Dallas or I’d have an awesome post to share. Thanks for posting as it’s awesome. Bitey lmao

    Like

    Jessica recently posted In My Mailbox.

  265. way back when I worked at the grocery store I put up a sign for a “found imaginary friend” stating that at first I was happy to have him and he would not be returned but then he kept trying to give my dad a hand job so please come and pick him up.

    hmm 2 years later I was laid off…

    Like

    clevelandpoet recently posted September’s top Overheard Ohio.

  266. Speaking of very bitey! I have a plant for you! My mom has another one sooo if you want a devil spawned bitey plant just let me know🙂

    Like

    Ciarra recently posted And the devil spawn shall be called, Michael.

  267. WOW–I don’t think ANYbody in SC has a sense of humor like that! I still think I might try something similar, just to see what happens–because I’m from DC, afterall, I just happen to LIVE in SC currently…

    Like

  268. THAT makes this transplanted Texan homesick…:( LOVED growing up in Austin!

    Like

  269. I thought you lived out in the wilderness! You have neighbors?

    Like

    the muskrat recently posted the last of the kits.

  270. I love that the last comment looks like it’s in Grandma handwriting – all flowy and scripty, a little bit shaky.

    I picture a stooped over 80 year old woman giggling to herself as she wrote it.

    Like

  271. There are no snakes in my home Country, luckily.
    But we laughed heartily.
    Greines form Germany
    Kathleen

    Like

  272. Considerably well executed writing

    Like

  273. OMG! This made its way to “tastefully offensive” with the label “why it’s important to put collars on all your pets” http://tumblr.tastefullyoffensive.com/

    Like

  274. OMG! Just saw your pic at “tastefullyoffensive!” Yay!
    (Caption: This is why it’s important to put collars on all of your pets…

    P.S. – sorry, I’m having trouble leaving a comment so if this got posted multiple times, I apologize.

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    Your Latest Fan recently posted This is why it’s important to put collars on all of your....

  275. I like your neighbor who apparently is the ambassador of conviction. He’s like the grandpa of the neighborhood. There to point out your short-comings.

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    Abby recently posted Don, A Girl's Best Friend?.

  276. Ill make sure to put collars on all my pet cobras! Thanks for the tip.

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  277. The reason we follow you is because you are a bitch! A bitch with balls bigger than any PR firm! I’m a fucking bitch myself & proud of it! FUCKING BITCHES UNITE! We need rings, or uniforms, or matching spandex…..something

    Like

  278. Yes, I’m a little late on reading this, but as a Texan, loves me some rattlesnakes! I am laughing/crying at my desk right now!!!

    Like

  279. That’s absolutely hilarious!

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    Denise recently posted I Love TV.

  280. Nice post! I believe that snakes are everywhere.. Just be prepared ‘coz you’ll ever know when they will attack you.

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    gabby recently posted Some Common Diseases That Can Affect Your Young Arowana.

  281. I would love this picture (before it went missing and was stolen) on a T-shirt. “Very bitey” indeed!

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  282. 287
    Jerry Bauer

    This picture I found seems derivative.

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