Someone’s gonna need a tetanus shot.

Yesterday we went to a flea market, which is always filled with equal part awesomeness and creepiness and a fair amount of people who maybe shouldn’t be allowed to park their own cars.

But my favorite part of the day was when I came across this box being sold by a very sweet older couple:

Um…what?

Um…what?

It was a little bizarre to find an antique vibrator box, but even more unsettling was that the lady at the booth told me that the contents were still “intact and pristine, considering the age.”  And then I opened the box and found this:

I don't know if this is more or less unsettling.

That’s the pinchiest looking vibrator I’ve ever seen.

And I stared at it and said, “Wow.  We’ve come a long way, I guess?  I mean, I don’t even understand how this would work,” and the woman said, “Well, these are just the attachments to the vibrator, obviously” and I was like “Well, obviously” and then she clarified that they would have been used with older “Domestic Vibrator” and I admitted that I didn’t even know there were commercial models available and she looked at me strangely and then her partner cleared his throat and said “The Domestic Vibrator was a brand of sewing machine in the 1900’s” and the woman looked at her partner like, “Well, of course it was.  Why are you even clarifying this?”   And then I nodded like I’d known this all along.

And I was relieved.

And a little bit disappointed.

*******************

And in other news, it’s Sunday, which means its time for the weekly wrap-up:

sid

What you missed in my shop (Named “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

What you missed on the internets:

This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:

This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by Kelly Exeter at A Life Less Frantic. She’s got an awesome new book out called Your Best Year Yet – 7 Simple Ways to Shift Your Thinking and Take Back Control of Your Life and she’s so confident this short and sweet little tome of life-inspiration (Kelly loathes the term self-help) will deliver your best year EVER, she’s even offering a money-back guarantee.  You can check it out here.

146 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Domestic Vibrator, as opposed to Feral Vibrator and Untamed Vibrator. Of course, how could I forget that?

  2. OMG, That is scary! I’m glad she clarified the sewing machine part…

    Ha, There was a sewing machine called a vibrator!

    Rhonda recently posted Keep Your Religious Freedom. I Prefer Fair Treatment For Everyone..

  3. I WISH YOU HAD VIDEO. I’m giggling maniacally at the mental movie in my head of this encounter.

    mousegoddess recently posted In which we find ourselves with something completely different.

  4. I won’t be seeing zombeavers. Nope.

    Anubis Bard recently posted The Love Note to 2014, February 9-15.

  5. Vibrator for a Dalek, maybe?

  6. I live close to Larry Flynt’s hustler store…there is some scary stuff in there. Not quite THAT scary, but still….

    Michelle recently posted Two Arguments, One Marriage.

  7. i hope you still bought it, cause having a antique box emblazoned with Vibrator is just too good to pass up. you could use it to keep cat treats in, or by the front door for house keys.

  8. I’d be relieved and disappointed, too.

    I’d love to go to a flea market with you. You find the best stuff.

    Jess recently posted BSC Super Special #1: Baby-sitters on Board!.

  9. So, inquiring minds want to know – did u buy it? I would just to bust it out during dinner parties and family holidays.

  10. Sometimes there aren’t enough words in the world to describe how much I adore you.

    Simone recently posted Are book trailers worth it?.

  11. I wondered if it was an antique vibrator too and I’ve seen sewing machine parts. I don’t remember ever seeing them with round edges like that. I think she was covering up a secret society sexual counter culture from the 1920’s.

    susielindau recently posted The Ultimate Blog Party – Use Me and Abuse Me Days!.

  12. 12
    sisterhoodofthesensiblemoms

    You did buy it, right?

  13. 13
    sisterhoodofthesensiblemoms

    I still think it is a code name. Sewing machine. Riiiighhhttt.

  14. I totally would have bought it and then whenever I had people over randomly ask “hey do you want to come in my bedroom and check out my old vibrator?”

  15. If you’re interested in reading a really fascinating history that covers the invention of the vibrator in 1880 (among other things), you should check out The Technology of Orgasm by Rachel Maines. It’s a really fascinating history!

  16. I’m not satisfied with this answer. I bet they made it up on the spot because they didn’t think anyone would have the guts to ask. Though, to be fair, what 19th century lady wouldn’t want some vibrating action while sewing? [stitch, stitch, happy-time]

  17. Torturous looking vibrators and killer zombie beavers. You post the best stuff. Cures my cabin fever, you betcha!

    marydpierce recently posted The sound of falling snow.

  18. Would make such a cute storage box. Ahem.

  19. 20
    Amber Tinsley

    I would totally keep it in my purse and whilst checking out at stores pull it out and set it on the counter while I’m trying to find my wallet.

  20. In all fairness, if the Victorians HAD made sex toys, they would totally be exactly like what was in that box. Possibly with the express purpose of making the point that sex can kill you.

    Natalie recently posted I prefer to think of it as "vampire resistant".

  21. Sad cat diary is EPIC!

  22. hahahhahaha!!! Sewing machine?! Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

    I’m such a sucker for nice packaging that if I were you I’d probably buy it and use it as a storage box… and a good way to make house guests feel awkward. Two birds, one stone!

  23. I found an old box labeled Vibrator in my parents attic a couple years ago. Turns out it was from a barber shop. The contraption had a motor on top with some springs below and you slipped your hands between the springs and the motor casing and then used your fingers to give someone a scalp massage. I still laugh every time I think about my dad explaining it, and my sister and I turning purple from trying not to laugh.

    The Suzzzz recently posted I am NOT an Optometrist.

  24. 25
    ocularnervosa

    I knew those things looked familiar and I knew I had once seen them at my Grandmother’s house. I can’t tell you how relieved I was to go “Oh yeah, sewing machine attachments”.

  25. My reactions as I read through this blog: “Haha!”, “Huh?”, “Ouch!”, “Oooooh.”, “Hehehe.”

  26. Wow. Looks more like something you’d hang a picture with. Were they rusty? Meaning the implements not the couple’s skillz. Also here’s a fun read: http://www.amazon.com/The-Technology-Orgasm-Hysteria-Satisfaction/dp/0801866464/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1392576341&sr=8-1&keywords=technology+of+orgasm

  27. I don’t think you were the confused one. They must not know that the word means something TOTALLY different now. I feel bad for them, not knowing the awkward things that they said.

  28. Good thing, because stitches are exactly what you would need after attempting to use that in that way! ;)

    The Dose of Reality recently posted Pinterest Nightmare #350: The TwoDaLoo.

  29. I’ll give you a hundred bucks to hook that puppy up to something and give it a whirl. literally.

  30. I totally should have recognized sewing machine parts. I grew up making a lot of my own clothes on an old Singer. But I have to admit that the name threw me enough that I never even made the connection!

    Fun post and you make me want to go to a flea market.

  31. I knew immediately when I saw them that they were sewing machine parts, but just figured they were in a weird box.
    The more you know….

  32. Well, I might’ve been one of the few people who instantly knew what those metal objects were and honestly, I actually got a little excited when I saw them (no pun intended).
    For the last ten years, I’ve been sewing on my mom’s circa 1970’s Domestic (though not vibrating) sewing machine.
    So, when I saw those, I was all oooohh’s and aaahhhh’s. :D

  33. “cleared his throat.” (possibly to avoid choking?) hysterical. I think my soon-to-be-middle-school-girl needs the pocket journal to arm her those first few months.

  34. If they had vibrators in Home Economics I might have made a better grade IFYAKNOWWUTIMEANITHINKYADO.

    Rachael recently posted AGoholics Anonymous.

  35. Perfect Valentine’s gift. SOME people give chocolates. Psh, amateurs.

    random elouise recently posted THIS IS HOW WE DO IT.

  36. I guess I’m just boring … I looked at the second picture of the box and the first thought in my mind was “oh. sewing machine feet.” before I ever read down and saw the explanation.

    And the Domestic Vibrator sewing machine is definitely a thing.

  37. There’s a reason our grandmothers loved those machines.

    http://wifelyperson.blogspot.com/

  38. At the turn of the (other) century, textile manufacturers gave saltpeter to the female factory workers because it was believed the rhythm of the treadle and the vibrations from the machines sexually aroused them. So I would venture that this sewing machine was aptly named.

  39. Once I got done giggling like a school girl I kind of felt bad for the lady. Someone needs to buy her a vibrator for christmas.

  40. Have you seen the movie Hysteria? Fascinating!

  41. While watching a show about the diagnosis of “Hysteria”, of course the “cure of orgasm” was discussed, as was the advent of the vibrator. I was more than puzzled see the vacuum cleaner that dominated every Saturday (chore day) featured. Holy guacamole, Batgirl, my parents own that vacuum! So of course, I called right away and asked my very conservative mother if she knew. She was HORRIFIED. My dad, however, in the background, was laughing his ass off. He knew, and still had it, unopened in the original box. I guess it could be considered a collector’s item????

  42. There is a store in Provincetown, MA, that has a display of antique vibrators. There were some brave, desperate women back in the day.

  43. Hilarious! You got me. “Pinchiest” indeed. =) Thanks for the laugh.

    Jenny Williams recently posted I Know I Shouldn’t Complain, But….

  44. Crafts.

    Also: Hunter S. and parking? Pure gold.

    And now, because of Lynne, I want to go to Provincetown. (And it’s not that far away.)

  45. Also, I obviously have to spend more time on Twitter.

  46. True story – my mom used to take my oldest to auction sales when he was younger. Once they were poking around in the mixed boxes and came up with an old fashioned plug in vibrator. Which considering the shortage of wall outlets in older style homes leaves me wondering things I don’t really want to wonder.

    I’m relieved those attachments are for a sewing machine, but it would be awesome if all vibrators came in such a pretty tin.

  47. I kid you not… I went to a flea market yesterday and found a 2 inch tack stuck in the bottom of my damn shoe. Pointy and rusty and didn’t stick my foot. Thank the flea market gods!

  48. I so wish I could have seen that woman’s face when it dawned on her…

  49. 50
    Kitty Lapin Agile

    so, in Europe they did not switch to foot powered sewing machines for a LONG time (at first all sewing machines were hand cranked). the reason is that a woman could….well pleasure herself while pumping to make the machine run. In Europe (which obviously has changed a lot) it was felt that this was wrong….after all Eve did eat that apple….so they kept selling hand cranked models.

  50. I laughed so hard reading Amber Tinsley comment. I love your followers they are Awesome!

  51. I’m sure after her partner explained things, they had a good laugh and they’ll be able to share that story forever. You do find some strange things…

  52. 53
    Debbie Whitehead

    I bought a Domestic sewing machine in 1975 at a garage sale for $15. Best purchase I’ve ever made. I still sew with it and it’s an absolute work horse. I would have snapped up those attachments in a hot minute!

  53. Sad cat diary was awesome. But even better: the Winter Olympic sport of curling. With cats.

    http://happyplace.someecards.com/29352/the-winter-olympics-weirdest-sport-curling-just-got-a-lot-more-watchable-with-cats

  54. If that’s a domestic vibrator, I’d love to see an industrial one.

    Psychobabble recently posted Amazingly Wonderful Worries.

  55. I once was at a yard sale where there really was a kit with a dildo and attachments. The home owners kept saying there was more stuff in the house and I was welcome to come in if I wanted. I could not drive away fast enough.

  56. 57
    Nichole Renee

    Comment #7 by Celeste? Best. Idea. Ever.

  57. That is so funny. I recognized what the stuff was – my mother had a very old Singer sewing machine, and the buttonhole gadget looked similar. I would have LOVED to have seen you open that box.

    Geek Goddess recently posted Looking for New Cookbooks? Tired of Healthy?.

  58. Wow- you scared me…I watched the movie “Hysteria” and it turns out women diagnosed with hysteria went to the doctors to get banged. Then they invented the vibrator. Around 1730 in France…it has quite a history.

    edimminger recently posted Dunn Is Done.

  59. In Australia we have Vibrator Races. Put yours in the circle and watch it Gooooo Oh God

  60. I’m just jealous that Hunter S. sleeps in the TARDIS box that TARDIS boots come in…and that you are probably wearing the TARDIS boots. I am blue with envy.

  61. chokes on Diet Sunkist laughing

  62. You must be a kid in a candy store at a flea market, Jenny. Or a beaver in an antique shop.
    Either way, you must squeal with delight the entire time, I imagine.

    The Hook recently posted Next Year, I’m Booking Valentine’s Day Off..

  63. Okay…was the BRAND of the sewing machine “Vibrator” or was that the model?
    Hmph…I wonder why I even think that matters…except that a whole COMPANY named Vibrator seems somehow worse than just having one of your model lines named “the Vibrator”.

    Marianne recently posted Swamp thang.

  64. The vibrator story and the Sad Cat Diary – hilarious! You bring so much sunshine into my otherwise boring world!!

  65. Actual conversation with Dear Sweet Mama –
    Hoody: Did you read Jenny today?
    DSM: No, why?
    HH: She found the most interesting thing at the flea market.
    DSM: Oh, she just drives me crazy!
    Of course, in her defense, DSM has been looking for a taxidermied woodchuck for over a year…

    hoodyhoo recently posted When Hoody Ain’t Happy….

  66. Holy crap I really thought it was like a crazy weird old vibrator and I was slightly terrified for a minute!

  67. I go to yard sales on Saturday mornings with several friends all the time. At one, we did indeed find an antique vibrator, complete with attachments. It was NOT for a sewing machine. We bought it for another friend’s birthday, although I’m not sure it ever made it to her. True Story.

    If I can find it, I will send you a picture for proof.

    TheFakeGourmet recently posted Nick’s Easy-Peasy Ice Cream Sandwich Cake.

  68. Zombeavers AND Cat Diary?

    In one blog?

    My cup runneth over.

    With winebuprofen.

    My shoulder feels better already.

    HogsAteMySister recently posted Venus, Mars & Horking.

  69. That looks a little ouchie.

  70. I jumped to the same conclusion you did. I wonder if her partner will explain the confusion to her later.

    Sue recently posted Don't mess with my weekend..

  71. 72
    riceballmommy

    I love the sad cat diary. Also best thing every for cats: http://tardisbuilders.com/index.php?PHPSESSID=cacgk76rd2mjsjifo83piq7lf6&topic=3032.0

  72. I too wonder if the husband will explain to his wife what you were actually thinking.

    morgandrake recently posted What My Hierophant Should Have Taught Me (Book Review).

  73. This post needs a “The More You Know” banner.

  74. Thank you once again for making my day. And realizing how much the English language morphs over time.

    skullwoman recently posted Double Bass.

  75. Does anyone else get that thing where you start out laughing, then the laughing with tears starts, then that laugh turns into the ugly cry, and then pretty soon you feel so much better?

    Thank you, Internet. Thank you, Hunter S. Thank you, zefrank1. Thank you, Jenny, I feel better now.

  76. I really, really want that sewing machine. God, what a beauty.

  77. As soon as I saw the picture of the open box, I immediately knew what it was! I have even more intricate sewing machine attachments from my grandmother.

  78. It has been a very long day at work, and I am now out of wine, but this made me so very happy. Thank you, Jenny!

  79. Well, they used to sell “personal care” attachments for mixers (so you could mix cake batter and then yourself?) back when orgasms were masquerading as solution to women’s hysteria. “The Technology of Orgasm” is an informative (if a bit dry) read of this history between not acknowledging women during sex, and tying the female orgasm to sex:

  80. Well, they used to sell “personal care” attachments for mixers (so you could mix cake batter and then yourself?) back when orgasms were masquerading as solution to women’s hysteria. “The Technology of Orgasm” is an informative (if a bit dry) read of this history between not acknowledging women during sex, and tying the female orgasm to sex.

  81. I’m just imagining the conversation they had later, and snicker-giggling.

  82. I would have bought it, then displayed it openly to see which of my friends and family had the guts to ask me about it.

    Does it make me a bad person that I would have turned to her and said “Did you know there was a movie about the invention of Vibrators? Totally worth checking out.” (Hysteria btw.)

    kosturcompose76 recently posted Inspiring?.

  83. Sad Cat Diary was hilarious! You might like Simon’s Cat too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5FUH3eoizc

    Now I know what Zombeavers are like…. but what about Zombachelors?

    Ariel recently posted Notre Dame's Rich Tapestry.

  84. OMG! I was SO disturbed until i read ‘sewing machine.’ I looked at that picture for a few minutes, like ‘who the HECK designed that vibrator? People are into some kinky shit…’

    Jane @ The Blue Morpho recently posted Dear Universe; Screw the Vampires, I'm Writing This.

  85. I did not recognize these are sewing machine parts and thought it was something kinky…
    but Terri#39 & Kitty#50 are correct. My grandmother told stories of the women in the textile shops working along on the foot powered machines suddenly getting red faced and sewing really fast then suddenly slumping back for a minute or two…

  86. Now that I’m aware of the existence of the domestic vibrator, I realize how incomplete my life is. I need to own that sewing machine.

    Lydia recently posted Getting Started — because let’s face it, that’s the hardest part.

  87. My brain went immediately where your brain went when I saw the box and the attachments.

    Welcome to the gutter my friend.

  88. AWESOME SAUCE!!!

  89. Thank God! She clarified you all the stuff that those attachment works for sewing Machine.. I thought the same what you thought when I saw the box and the attachments.

    I am imagining, what if I would have bought it in despiration without knowing the actual use of it and how the thing would turn out??? Funny! :)

    Payal Pandya recently posted 4 Creative Ways To Wear Denim.

  90. The attachments frightened me! I wonder if vibrating sewing machines and bored seamstresses were the initial motivation to invent the vibrator as we know it today:)

    Pinky Poinker recently posted There's More than One Way to Skim a CAT Scan..

  91. My Mom sells stuff like that on Ebay all the time, I knew she was a perv…awesome!!

  92. Hmmm. I never heard of the vibrator sewing machine brand, but I played around with my mom’s sewing machines enough that I knew the box was full of sewing machine feet. So for me the thrill was gone before it began . . . which I guess is topic relevant feeling I suppose.

  93. How the, what the, only to you Jenny, only to you ;D Also, same exact font as on the old Singer machines – wonder who knocked off who (heh heh)

  94. omfg i would have done the same thing. as soon as she said something about ‘domestic vibrator’ i probably would have lost my shit. HOWEVER, depending on the price, i might have purchased it just for that case.

    i’d probably keep pens in it and take it out at work all the time to get a pen. in the doctors office, i need a pen for forms… pull out my vibrator case for a new pen. obvs.

    steph gas recently posted fuck this motherfucking snow.

  95. Just one recommended link away from the Sad Cat Diary lies Dog Girlfriend VS Cat Girlfriend. Worth the price of admission. :-)

  96. 12 hours later and still recovering from ZOMBeavers – maybe that new-fangled “vibrator” will help? hmmmmm

    thetattootourist recently posted STRANGELING-Faeries, Vampires and Mermaids Oh My….

  97. That looks like an Altoids tin. I hope you bought that to take out the metal stuff and fill with Altoids to carry around in your purse. Bad breath? Get the “virbrator”.

    Shelley J recently posted Beauty "don'ts" from the girl who did.

  98. I have that SAME box of sewing items – but mine just says “Attachments”, how disappointing!

  99. ROFLLLLL!!! The things that are going through my mind to comment with are completely inappropriate and would probably have me banned from internet-dom.

    Katie recently posted A Little Controversy in the Spirit of Valentine's Day.

  100. The pieces in the top part of the box look like parts of a saxophone — which got me all excited for a minute because I imagined making beautiful music with the vibrator. Huh.

  101. I’m going to write a Zombie Apocalypse Preparedness Guide. Chapter 4: Creative Uses for Treadle Sewing Machines. Then you’ll be able to use that attachment for its TRUE purpose.

    Susan recently posted Episode 31: MOAR DISNEY (Disneyland Tips).

  102. Because cats (always a great reason):
    http://imgur.com/NZPqJWC

  103. My grandma had a “Vibrator” and it didn’t patch holes in socks. I’m just sayin, I think he may have gotten embarrassed. I mean I could google Vibrator Sewing machine, but I don’t want to bleach my eyes today.

    Woman_on_Pause recently posted Snot funny.

  104. Best laugh I’ve had all day! Thank you!

    Cris recently posted The Yearly Tree Post.

  105. When I first moved to San Francisco 2 decades ago, someone told me to check out Good Vibrations. It was a female friendly sex toy store, less pictures of naked women, no porn, all kinds of toys. Anyway I didn’t buy anything but I remember the entrance had a glass display case with a very old, wooden, hand cranked vibrator… I remember wondering if anyone ever had to worry about splinters! Thanks for making us laugh and reminding us that we are not alone <3

  106. Oh dear. I can’t imagine having that conversation with a straight face. LOL

    stef recently posted Those Aren't Sequins! Remembering Our Nomads of the 70's.

  107. Oh my, how wonderful. That must have been a very funny and awkward conversation

  108. OMFG, I want to get this for my wife, she would be running all around the house yelling “let me sew that button back on your shirt using my “vibrator”” and “let me sew your zipper back in your jeans using my “vibrator””. This would totally be true and be absolutely hysterical.

    On a side note, looking at the box that the so called “attachments” came in you can see an interesting shadow between the T-O-R of the word “Vibrator”. Hint: this in not a long stem mushroom shaped item. That is all.

  109. Suddenly those conversations with “sex-crazed” Grandma make a lot more sense.

    kstewand4cats recently posted What Happens When I Get Invited Places…...

  110. That is all kinds of awesome! I would totally have the box out on a table someplace. Or maybe on the fireplace.

    And somebody needs to make an actual movie of Zombeavers.

  111. well no wonder so many women were seamstresses back then…Ah hah!

    toni ratteree recently posted Lose the comfort zone…It`s too comfortable!.

  112. You need a reality show . That is hysterical

  113. BEST. STORY. EVER!!! This was exactly the laugh I needed today, also I’ve got to go to more flea markets. Gold, absolute gold!

  114. just in case u have not seen it u should check out on youtube “Danson la Capucine”… because cats : )

  115. Best post ever!!
    Also, I love that the sweet old lady still has such innocence!

  116. See? This is precisely why I miss your sexis columns, because I otherwise wouldn’t find out about vintage vibrators that turn out to be parts of sewing machines. Unless I read your blog, which I do. And I just did, and I found out about them… So, I guess what I’m saying is I wish you wrote more about horrifying and funny sex (or not?) related stuff. Only if you want to, of course. I’m fine reading everything else you post anyway. I’ll just shut up and wait for your next book now, this is getting awkward.

    Lina recently posted Shoes and chocolates.

  117. Have you seen Hysteria (the movie about the invention of vibrators)? It was awesome. I would totally buy an old timey vibrator. It would be like steampunking my orgasms.

    maurnas recently posted Weird Things.

  118. Can’t. Stop. Giggling.

  119. I just found your blog, and have spent the last three hours reading post after post. Basically you’ve changed my life.

  120. Wait…are you saying this is the first time you’ve been caught discussing sex toys with elderly strangers? Surely this can’t be so… That would seem wrong, and…sad.

    I think the worst part of this entire exchange is that these people have little idea that they were just spooged in your awesomeness. You should really make business cards that say something along those lines, so when this happens, you can just hand one over and ride off into the sunset. I feel they should also have a questionable graphic…one that can’t be shown to children.

  121. Love this story of the Domestic Vibrator. Thanks for the morning laugh.

  122. This made me laugh. I was pretty sure I knew what was in the box before you showed it opened. My mom has an obesession with sewing machines (and yes, her obesession has rubbed off on me…). However, I had never heard of a Vibrator sewing machine. Now, my life’s goal is to find one, make a quilt on it and tell everyone I made this quilt with my Vibrator. Oh the look on people’s faces would be pricelss!! Thanks so much for the laugh!

  123. just in case you missed it, http://imgur.com/gallery/r8RaUXW

  124. Eek! Ouch!! Giving domesticity a new edge. Ow!

  125. You mean you’ve never used your Singer to pleasure yourself?

    Ok now I’m creeping myself out.

    Teri recently posted Outrage at the killing of dogs at the Olympics.

  126. Oh man… now you’re the pervy girl at the flea market. That man is going to remember you all day. Side eye

    Jean recently posted Ebay: Where To Buy Love, Sex and Souls.

  127. When I was a kid I was snooping in my parents closet looking for hidden Christmas presents and found my mother’s vibrator. Lost a little of my innocence that day and never searched for presents again.

  128. 132
    Holly (a.k.a Adore Prince)

    Whoa. I just realized that this picture of the vibrator box appeared in my dream last night. There was this huge 100+ group of older folks in full kevlar outfits protesting gang activity. One of them had a cart of stuff, and this was on the bottom shelf. Not that you care about my dreams, but I’m now afraid to look at future posts — because I now also recall that the very old man next to the cart woman was frantic after losing his Cialis pill. I didn’t need that in my head.

  129. Zombeavers now. Oh goody. We didn’t have enough to worry about? I’m afraid to brush my teeth. Thanks a lot.

  130. I’m so relieved that there this was for a different kind of vibrator :)

    Brenna recently posted A look back.

  131. Must be the perfect gift for Kembra Pfahler, a controversial artist, who – as documented in Richard Kern’s short film “Sewing Circle” – likes to have her lady parts sewn up. Better not watch with your kid.

  132. oh shit, I LOVE me some flea market finds! I went to a terrible (and by terrible,I mean terribly entertaining) flea market this weekend. I was overwhelmed by dead butterfly jewelry, salt & pepper shakers held by skull eye sockets, and a home fragrant oil collection which included, “Monkey Farts”.& “Sweet Pussy”.

  133. Laughing hysterically…and then I saw Hunter S. Thomcat in his new sleeping spot and seriously fell out of my chair laughing so hard. Thank you Jenny! Thank you so much!

    Brittany Boyce recently posted Viceroy of Micro Managing.

  134. I would’ve been just as confused! It’s like a great joke, except real. Like the “dildo” I found in the kids toybox at our daycare. Yikes.

    Moni Barrette recently posted Hump day round-up.

  135. Everytime I see that photo of the box I am disturbed by the mangled baby’s foot just under the lid.

  136. Oooooh, it’s your hand. How did I not see that?

  137. 142
    Norton's Mom

    And to think, for 23 years, I have been silently cursing my cousin in East Tennessee for getting my grandmother’s pristine Singer pedal-push sewing machine…. when I could have had a Vibrator model instead. SUCK IT COUSIN VICKY! You keep that old Singer! My new life goal is to get a Domestic Vibrator.

  138. of all the words to describe a vibrator, “pinchy” is probably the scariest.

  139. I sew. I use vintage sewing machines. I have NEVER heard of a Vibrator sewing machine, but this post made me laugh out loud so hard, I started choking, then laughed some more and cried.

  140. oh sweet awesomeness….I’m crying at this. Thank you for being so awesome

  141. worth it for the box alone!

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