Today is Throwback Thursday, which means I get to just post an old picture and not write anything, but I never do it right because I can’t follow directions properly.
This is me with a sheep:
I think I’m about 6. It’s not my sheep because we could afford sheep until I was much older, but I’m assuming it was a neighbors since I’m barefoot and obviously walked there. You can see a small bald spot on my head from when I discovered the awesome noise that scissors make when they cut hair. I’m wearing a dress that I think my mom sewed out of an old sheet and it was my favorite dress ever. It was like I was already in bed when I was wearing it.
The shitty thing about bottle-feeding a sheep is that they try to rip the bottle out of your hand because they’re super selfish and want ALL OF THE MILK ALL OF THE TIME, but then if they pull the bottle out of your hands and you drop it they just look at you like it’s your fault even though they were yanking on it like they were furious you even had it. And now I’m wondering if they do that in real life with their mother’s nipples. Like, do they grab hold and just yank hard like they’re trying to rip off her boob and run away with it? If the sheep mom has two babies do they try to rip her in half? Is this why my neighbors were always letting me feed sheep babies? Was it because all of the sheep moms were recovering from dangerous boob injuries? Or do lambs just get that grabby with milk bottles because they assume that you must have ripped off a boobie yourself and they want to hurry up and get away from you as quickly as possible because you’re obviously a dangerous nipple-ripper?
These are the questions that will never be answered.
My husband says they’re questions that should never be asked.
I’m not quite sure which of us is right.