Someone left me a comment recently saying that I was “not fit for decent society.” And they’re right and I sort of wonder who they thought they were surprising. I’ve known I wasn’t fit for decent society since I was seven and did a book report while wearing roller skates and twirling a baton (true story). But that’s okay. Because decent society isn’t really a good fit for me either. In fact, “in decent society” is one of the most terrible places to spend any real time. “In prison” is almost as bad as “in decent society” but not really because at least in prison you don’t have to wear panty hose. Also, you might be judging me for choosing jail over country clubs because of panty hose, but I think that just proves that I’m not fit for decent society. I just proved myself right in an argument I was having with no one. In other words, please stop trying to insult me because I’m much better at it than you are because I have more practice.
And in other news, it’s Sunday, which means it’s time for the weekly wrap-up:
What you missed in my shop (Named “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):
- Someone insulted me and so I stole that insult and put it on a shirt. That’s how the internet works.
- As requested, double double unicorn club mug for drinking awesome. Or vodka. Whatever works for you.
What you missed on the internets:
- Kick-ass stuff I pinned.
- I sort of lost it a bit this week. Twitter helped me. Maybe it’ll help you too.
- Flattered to be #17.
This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:
This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by Matthew Karsten, a man who has seduced ostriches in South Africa, climbed erupting volcanoes in Guatemala, hitchhiked across America, and enjoys the luxury of “luggage-class” travel in Thailand. Join him in his ridiculous & fascinating adventures around the world at The Expert Vagabond. Want some new photography for your wall? Check out his online gallery full of amazing people, landscapes, and animals from around the world.