“CAT WATERBEDS FOR EVERYONE!” (would probably be my catchphrase.)

This week I was contacted about possibly being next year’s Ziploc spokesperson for upcoming new products.  They were very sweet and asked what my fees would be if I was selected and so I quickly responded in the most professional way possible by clarifying that if the “new products” they’re offering include home-made waterbeds for cat then I expect royalties, because I invented those years ago.

The rest of my response:

I’m almost certain this would be a bad idea so I’m in, but only if Ziploc meets these conditions:

1) My fee of $100,000, or $200,000 worth of Ziploc bags. The Ziploc bags should be filled with $100,000.

2) The cat waterbed must be put into production, or at least a prototype made.

3) I’m going to need a human-sized ziplock bag that I can get in, so I can swim but not get wet. Something with an oxygen tank, preferably.

4) I don’t have a four but I think people take you more seriously when you have a four so I’m just going to leave this here.

Surprisingly, they have not responded.

************

Bonus: If you’re too tired to go back and read about cat waterbeds my talented friends made that post into a comic years ago.  They pretty much nailed it.

from taroch vol 2

161 replies. read them below or add one

  1. I can’t believe you haven’t hard back from Ziplock yet. Perhaps they are just going to send you the cash, then work out the terms of the arrangement. Maybe they’ll send you $1 a day (in a ziplock bag, of course) for 100,000 days.

    Like

    Rhonda recently posted School Dress Code Says “Put Some Clothes On”.

  2. I would be willing to do that for ONE ziploc bag filled with 100K. I am such a whore.

    Like

    Michelle recently posted How To Survive Work Meetings.

  3. I’m thinking there’s a no-brainer tie-in for you with storing the innards of taxidermied animals…

    Like

    Daddy Scratches recently posted The Scratches Family’s Excellent Adventure, Part 3: Wide Right, motherfucker!.

  4. My favorite part is the cat wearing condoms as booties.

    Like

  5. Spokesman for Ziploc? Should I even admit that I am TOTALLY jealous? Should I tell my cats about the potential of a cat waterbed? Too many questions for a Friday. Ironically I was thinking (and writing) about how I once drank warm orange Fanta from a Ziploc bag that a kid sold me in Ecuador. Do you think that makes me a good candidate for Ziploc sponsorship? I would gladly take an ambassadorship if that is available.

    Like

    thetattootourist recently posted Plains, Trains and Automobiles – Witch Drs and Woe Keep on Truckin.

  6. If you added a few goldfish in the ziploc waterbed, you could charge admission.

    Like

    notquiteold recently posted Carry That Weight.

  7. You would be the best ziploc spokesperson ever. I bet you would come up with ALL SORTS of uses for ziplocs that they have never even thought of. How can they possibly not pick you? And I would make them give you the $100,000 one dollar at a time in individual ziploc bags. So much better that way.

    Like

    Cassandra recently posted Throwdown Thursday: To Sleep Perchance to Dream.

  8. “I’m going to need a human-sized ziplock bag that I can get in, so I can swim but not get wet.”
    If I come up with a line that brilliant, just once, I may never need to write again…

    Like

  9. Oh wow I would love to see you as a spokesperson…really for any product whatsoever. It’s brilliant.

    Like

    Ann St. Vincent recently posted 28 December 1998 | Part 2.

  10. I’m assuming that they asked you to be a spokesperson because they like your sense of humor, no? In which case, your reply was perfect.

    Like

  11. I don’t even have a cat and I want a cat waterbed.

    Like

  12. Duuuuuuuude you should do it! It would be hilarious and awesome and more Bloggess is ALWAYS in order!

    Like

    Ashleigh recently posted Loving Someone who has Depression.

  13. I think you’re selling yourself short. You should’ve asked for $300K and $200K worth of Ziplock bags full of 8 lbs of pure uncut cocaine in each bag.

    Like

    Teri recently posted How I Know It's Time for the Dog to Get a Haircut....

  14. You don’t want all that money getting wet, so having it sealed up with Ziploc brand Ziploc bags is definitely a good idea.

    Like

  15. Oh I’m just stuck on Cat-ta-cha-phrase morphing into a cha-cha-cha dance in my head and I swear there is nothing “extra” in my chicken soup. This is the creatively cuckoo tribe, right?

    Like

  16. Ziploc should have at least chosen option four. They may have another cat waterbed spokesperson but I bet you could take them. #teamjenny

    Like

    Stacey Graham (@staceyigraham) recently posted My query for literary representation. Otherwise known as "Good god, that agent took one hell of a leap of faith".

  17. Are they planning a new line of taxidermy safe ziplock bags? Then you take your animals boating, fishing, even to the pool. That’s the ticket!

    Like

    mmaxwellbey recently posted the fairy door.

  18. I don’t understand why they wouldn’t respond. You’re giving them so many different options! This is an opportunity for them to really show their creativity in how to give you that $100,000. And to get in on a once-in-a-lifetime product. What a disappointment.

    Like

    TOTOKITTY recently posted Enter Ricky Gervais’ Laughter Here.

  19. I don’t have TV, because I can stand commercials. But, the thought of seeing YOU on a commercial is making me re-think that….

    Like

  20. Honest Moment: If you where the spokesperson for Ziploc, i might actually think about buying them before automatically putting the generic brand in my cart. If they put your image on the box, i think name brand would actually win and be worth the $1.50 more!!

    Like

  21. I bet they’re just trying to figure out how much they could make off of cat waterbeds before they negotiate with you. That’s why Ziploc makes the big bucks.

    Like

    j. (@jeccaVee) recently posted Binaural Beats, and Why Not to Mine for Coal Using a Trained Allosaurus.

  22. Because it wasn’t enough to like the post on fb I also had to like the post for FB here in the blog too. You are hilarious.

    Like

  23. I think that’s perfectly reasonable. Your fee as well as the cat waterbed thing. Might as well go for it.

    Like

    Manicmom recently posted It’s kind of like I’ve already won the lottery.

  24. People are wondering why I’m laughing so hard but I’m not going to tell them.

    Like

  25. I feel silly asking because it feels like I should know…the answer is RIGHT THERE but I just can’t grasp it…so….why is the cat wearing condoms on it’s feet exactly?

    Like

  26. OK, so in the first panel I thought Victor was the boar’s head on the wall. I did not see the illustrated man in the bed.
    Secondly, I would watching the hell out of Ziplock commercials if you were in them. Creepy? Maybe.

    Like

  27. oh dear…I worry…

    Like

    itzybellababy recently posted #BringBackOurGirls, Month 5.

  28. I’d like to say that I would totally buy Ziploc bags if your face were on the package, but I’m poor and I really NEEEEED to save that fifty cents per box of plastic bags. But… A waterbed for cats? I just might be able to save up for that.

    Like

    Katy Bug recently posted Fake geek girl? (Crossposting from my tumblr).

  29. I want the conversation “So what’d your doctor say? The usual. Still crazy.” on a T-shirt for every time I go see the shrink. That’s a genius reply. What am I supposed to say every time I get back from there? There’s rarely anything new apart from the (probably non-functional-but-still-with-horrid-side-effects) new meds.

    Also, can’t believe you haven’t heard from Ziploc. What were they expecting?

    Like

  30. I don’t have a cat, but maybe I should get one. And a cat waterbed. And some roofies.

    Like

    Mandi recently posted Are You There God? It’s Me, Mandi.

  31. elisaashley @ 24 – So he doesn’t poke holes in the waterbed, of course!😀

    Like

  32. I thought “Roofies” was a musical about child roofing teams. Like ‘Newsies” but with more hammers. MORE HAMMERS!

    Like

  33. I’m shocked that ziploc hasn’t responded. How unprofessional!

    Like

    Molley@A Mother Life recently posted I’m a Grumpy Cat Lady, Apparently.

  34. Clearly the cat waterbed is the best idea ever. I wouldn’t have been able to top it. But, I would would have pitched them: “Ziplocs: You put your weed in there.”

    Like

    Foxy Wine Pocket recently posted You Can Thank Me by Sending Beer.

  35. I think we all know that they would be fools to reject you. Ziplocs: Keeps the animal carcasses fresh until you get to the taxidermist.

    Like

    The Dose of Reality recently posted This Post Is Brought To You By The Colbert Report.

  36. Fuck this fucking thing for forcing me to login to wordpress, which I don’t even use, in order to post a comment. It never did this before. Anyway I was going to say something about how my cats would view a popped waterbed as the ultimate beverage source, but now I’m too pissed to do that.

    Like

  37. Well I for one believe your conditions are perfectly reasonable. I’m sure you’ll hear back from Ziploc soon.

    (thanks for the laugh!) 🙂

    Like

    kdcol recently posted My stink signal.

  38. What perfectly reasonable demands.
    Probably haven’t responded as they’re too busy counting out 100,000 ziploc bags.

    Like

    Amy @ Toothbrush Travels recently posted Bosham Hoe.

  39. I imagine the response at ziploc corporate hQ was something like this: ” What the …???…??? … ??? … ??? … I think we should take this as a “no.” Next. “

    Like

  40. That comic is awesome. And I need one of those life-size human Ziploc bags too. But it would need an air-conditioner of some kind because I get all sweaty in Ziploc bags.

    Liked by 1 person

  41. Yeah. If you could just have them contact me, my fee is only 50k in ziploc bags but I DO request that it be in quarters. Cause laundry.

    Like

  42. Sigh… still not fast enough…

    Like

    tanktronic recently posted What Roger Goodell SHOULD Have Said.

  43. Would totally buy the waterbed for cats. I don’t have a cat, so it would become a waterbed for small dogs, but I think we can make that work.
    Also this came to mind:

    Like

    nerril recently posted PERIODS..

  44. That’s awesome!

    Like

  45. A waterbed for a cat is like giving a dog an indoor fire hydrant. Both really bad ideas.

    Like

    Laurie recently posted Last Dinner in “Windows on the World”.

  46. what about waterbeds for rodents? or squirrels? We need to think about all the little furry creatures comfort.

    Like

    Ronnie recently posted Derek Jeter.

  47. Thank you for making me laugh for the first time in, I don’t know. You have made my day!

    Like

  48. h Miller #32- MORE HAMMERS is the new MORE COWBELL.🙂
    Foxy Wine Pocket: Ziploc, you put your weed in there. Lmbo! Maybe you just put yourself on their radar and that’s why Jenny hasn’t heard back. They can’t decide between cat waterbeds or taking advantage of marijuana being legal in certain states, and building a specialized line for the Cannabis Crowd.
    Decisions, decisions.

    Like

  49. 50
    Doug in Oakland

    I let my cat play with a water-balloon out on the deck once. He jumped really high.

    Like

  50. Wait, did you want 100,000$ spread out through your 100,000$ of zip lock bags? or did you want 100,000$ in each of your 100,000$ worth of zip lock bags? Huge difference. That would be a good chunk of change.

    Like

    behind a plastic smile recently posted Introductions of the heros.

  51. I suddenly want to work for ziplock, which I’ve never wanted to do before.

    Like

  52. I had a friend whose mother was always making cat futons for a nonprofit–in such numbers I always wondered why every cat I met wasn’t in one. Now I’m wondering if she missed an opportunity. Cat waterbeds might not last long, but it would be worth it to catch the action on film.

    Like

    carygrantwonteatyou recently posted Being a Princess Would Suck: Roman Holiday.

  53. You didn’t specify the size of Ziploc bags that you wanted. Sandwich Bags, Freezer Bags, Space Savers? Just don’t put your Ziploc bag with the $100,000 in the oven…because who puts plastic and paper in the oven? Also, if someone else is already making cat waterbeds (per @Some Guy), you need to get a piece of the action.

    Like

  54. Sweet holy baby jeebus on a cracker that is some fucked up logic and utterly awesome at the same time. Though I’m not quite sure marketing at Ziploc is advanced enough to develop waterbeds for cats, it’s nice to know they are batshit crazy enough to see you as a real consumer. I’d be cool to know what new products they want to market. Maybe leak proof bags?
    also, why did your friends comic but condom booties on the cat’s feet?

    Like

    krazykris71 recently posted Happy National Talk Like a Pirate Day! Arrrgh.

  55. 57
    Irene of the north

    Commenting is fun because you are fun.

    Like

  56. You’re awesome and I think you’d make an awesome spokesperson.

    Like

  57. Comment test, just for you!

    Like

  58. 60
    Margaret Fite

    Here is a comment. I am not logged in to WordPress

    Like

  59. Like

  60. Commenting….

    Like

  61. Test. This is a rest. ❤️

    Like

  62. 64
    That weird chick

    Testing!

    Like

  63. Ummm yes, I cannot fathom going on the rest of my life without a cat waterbed…..seriously…I need one.

    Like

  64. Just doing a “comment test” for you. Because you’re The Bloggess and apparently you rate high enough in my life for me to waste time leaving rambling comments about comments. You’re welcome.

    Like

    Joanna recently posted School Daze....

  65. something something about making comments pressywords

    Like

    Jacquie recently posted gooberfest.

  66. It doesn’t seem to be making me log in…

    Like

  67. Just testing out the comment box as requested on FB.

    Like

  68. Like

  69. I find myself really hoping that they call you back on that.

    Like

  70. Hilarious!

    Like

  71. Why haven’t you run for president yet?

    Like

  72. That is amazing, my cats would LOVE a water bed.🙂

    Like

  73. Leaving a comment here when I know that you clearly requested that I leave my comment on FB.😉

    Like

  74. CAN YOU SEE THIS COMMENT? IF YOU CAN, LAUGH HYSTERICALLY.

    (HAHAHAHAHAHA! But why is it that some people say they can’t comment today without having a wordpress account? Argh. ~ Jenny)

    Like

    RachRiot recently posted The Blogger Mantra.

  75. Ok, one more for ya.

    Like

  76. I learned to make my bed every morning when I had cats and waterbeds. Why did it never occur to me to make them one of their own?

    Like

  77. Commenting without Word Press!

    Like

  78. If you were the spokesperson for ziplock, I would totally buy more ziplock bags as a show of support for your being the spokesperson. We need them anyway because apparently the state I live in has now banned plastic bags (at least in grocery stores) and we have two cats.

    Like

    Elizabeth recently posted Rearranging to remember: I realized I had only worn nail polish....

  79. Testing . . . testing . . .

    Like

  80. comment test… you’re the best!

    Like

  81. Do you ever feel like perhaps these companies are sending you pitches just see how you’ll respond?

    Like

  82. I am replying..via FB posted question. Confused yet?

    Like

  83. 86
    Marsha Peterson

    Yes, I can leave a comment without logging into to wordpress.

    Like

  84. If you can see this, I was able to comment. If not, I wasn’t really here so disregard this comment.

    Like

  85. I can comment!

    Like

  86. Test…

    Like

  87. Testing to see if I can comment – I did not log in to word press – I would love a cat waterbed if we can also make one for dogs …

    Like

  88. I sure hope I can comment without a wordpress account because it is SOOOOO annoying when that happens.

    Like

  89. Woot! No wordpress account needed!

    Like

  90. They don’t know what they’ve gotten into. Well, they do now!

    Like

  91. I can’t believe they haven’t responded. And hopefully this test works!

    Like

  92. a comment

    Like

  93. I chasm seed it now. …. water sprinklers and mad cats!

    Like

  94. Can I comment?

    Like

  95. I can leave a comment, not logged in to WP.

    Like

    Eve (Iateyourdamn) Apple recently posted A Very Cute Mutt.

  96. 99
    Tammy Fotinos

    I am testing your comments here.

    Like

  97. Testing the comments section because Jenny asked so nicely.

    Like

  98. So um I like cats, I watch cat videos on Youtube. OMG YOU SHOULD MAKE A FUCKING YOUTUBE CHANNEL JENNY. And by the way I have a cat waterbed. Just kidding but I would totally sit on it all fucking day if I did.

    Like

  99. By the way my 15 year old brother keeps getting PENIS ENLARGEMENT emails on his school computer. Totally on topic. Off topic is the new on topic. For real people. But I took a screenshot you should email me if you want to see it. (The screenshot not his dick) PS I don’t know why I had to clarify it. My email is gabysmiley123@gmail.com

    Like

  100. Yes, I can leave a comment. I though I’d leave you an old favorite:

    A Kitten
    by Eleanor Farjeon

    He’s nothing much but fur
    And two round eyes of blue,
    He has a giant purr
    And a midget mew.
    He darts and pats the air,
    He starts and cocks his ear,
    When there is nothing there
    For him to see and hear.
    He runs around in rings,
    But why we cannot tell;
    With sideways leaps he springs
    At things invisible –
    Then half-way through a leap
    His startled eyeballs close,
    And he drops off to sleep With one paw on his nose.

    Like

  101. 104
    Kirsten Lambertsen

    Hi, Jenny. Testing yer commentz now🙂

    Like

  102. 105
    Stanleigh Erdnuss-Flieger III (and Ralph, the Wonder-Dog!)

    This is a test comment, as requested on facebook. I do not have a WordPress login.

    Like

  103. Testing, testing, 1, 2, 4… 😉
    Oh, I do not have a WordPress login

    Like

  104. 107
    Melodie Starkey

    Just testing this comment thing…

    Like

  105. Seeing if I can reply…..so far so good..

    Like

  106. You’ve probably figured out already that people without WordPress can comment, so I’m just stopping in to say hi! Because I like you.

    Like

  107. Cat plus waterbed becomes cat fountain…🙂 Ziploc has to send you lots and lots of little bags now!

    Like

  108. Did you factor in the sharp little claws that could puncture the water bed?

    Like

  109. A lifetime supply of Ziploc bags would be handy. Just think of how many uses you could come up with as a reason for them to send more. And all those box tops for school…

    Like

  110. Nothing to see here. Just checking posting ability.

    Like

  111. Trying this out because I think that’s what you were asking us to do on Facebook.

    Like

  112. Sounds like a perfectly reasonable fee to me🙂

    Like

  113. Comment, comment, comment

    Like

  114. Came to comment. Stayed for the cat waterbeds.

    Like

    Liz recently posted Zoe vs. Barbara Walters.

  115. Testing the comments. I’m not touching you…

    Like

  116. 119
    Brenda Bravo-Kapper

    I love it , this was my first laugh of the day. Thanks

    Like

  117. 120
    Melissa Bollinger

    Thanks for the giggles. You and Ziploc were made for each other.

    Like

  118. Totally post checking. Not signed in to wordpress. Also, HA! Bet that’ll learn ’em.
    And before I could post the fuckers made me log in. Drat.

    Like

  119. That comic is awesome! I always know i can find a smile on your blog, thanks!

    Like

  120. Commenting with NO wordpress!

    Like

  121. I am logged into wordpress… I can post

    Like

  122. I am not logged into wordpress…and I could comment!

    Like

  123. Brilliant!

    Like

  124. oh – I read that wrong. I didn’t understand that it was a waterbed FOR cats. I thought is was a waterbed filled with cats so you would be lying in bed surrounded by fluffy goodness… although in hindsight, that wouldn’t be terribly comfortable for the cats… and then you would not call it a waterbed, you’d call it a cat bed and that IS a bed for cats, not a bed OF cats. English is a Möbius strip sometimes…

    (Great. Now I want a waterbed made of cats too. ~ Jenny)

    Like

  125. The Ziploc bag for a human is a brilliant idea. Or perhaps a small one, just for the part of your head that has hair on it. B/c bathing caps ruin hair, as my mother always said. But a ziploc bag, well that would still show off your do while doing the backtstroke:). You’re genius.

    Like

    candidkay recently posted Lessons I did not mean to learn.

  126. Is it just me? The first thing I noticed is that it looks like you live in a motel room. Not that there’s anything wrong that…

    Like

    Gina W. recently posted Unsolicited advice for my dear readers.

  127. This is a comment where I don’t have to log into anything in order to leave it, that is, unless after I type it and click to post it, it then asks me to log in. So far so good, though!

    Like

  128. I didn’t have to log into anything.

    Like

  129. At first, I thought the head mount on the wall was supposed to be Victor’s head… Then you would really have something to talk to your shrink about!😉

    Like

    averyhanaden recently posted The Apple Core Complex.

  130. Hello? Testing testing.

    Like

  131. My dog just stole my husbands socks again. He runs around like a little horse. Which is cute. I always wanted a horse. This way I have a dog who runs like one and steals socks🙂 And I wrote this because you asked on FB that we try to leave a comment.

    Like

    PB Ray recently posted 1:6 Size Halloween Haunt Shoppe.

  132. Is this the post that hates commenters? Because cat waterbeds are awesome. Or would be, if they worked. Because claws.

    Like

  133. random comment because there may be a problem with signing in?!? Sure I post a random comment…random is my life ya know.

    Like

    Tammyc recently posted 287 days.

  134. I love all of this. You make me feel normal.

    Like

  135. I wish these companies had the balls to take you up on these requirements. I’d be more inclined to use their products if they had more fun. (Though to be honest, I already use ziplocs almost daily – I’d just be much happier about it if you got cat waterbeds and a gazillion dollars out of my using them.)😀

    Like

  136. If I were the Ziploc people, I would be down on my hands and knees in gratitude because their commercials were just written by you.

    And then I’d do commercials based on you lying in 1,000s of Ziploc bags and swimming in a Ziploc bag (with a camera in a Ziploc) and I would definitely make a prototype of a waterbed for cats.

    I mean, this writes itself. (Granted because you already wrote it.)

    Like

  137. OMG I think this is the most perfect comic ever created. Of course, as I type this I’m wondering if my doctor would give me roofies because the ambien and Tylenol PM clearly aren’t working right now. The Valerian smells terrible. Nothing else even remotely works and while ambien doesn’t always work either, at least it gives me fun ideas.

    Like

  138. Maybe it is the difference in climate between Texas and Michigan, but shouldn’t a cat waterbed have a dash reflector shade, and heat pad, to keep it at a cozy level of warm?

    Like

  139. Hmm, might have to get crafty and try out the cat waterbeds idea…

    Like

    Kattie recently posted Eeek!.

  140. That’s so awesome!

    Like

  141. And THAT is why I embrace my insomnia! The productivity possibilities are endless! Oh, and you are totally right about including a 4. I’m a lawyer. I know these things.

    Like

    Jeanie recently posted An EPCOT Adult Delicious Delight Duo!.

  142. 145
    Julia Thelen

    Test

    Like

  143. Cat + claws + waterbed = epic disaster movie? I’m thinking something on par with Sharknado or Snakes on a Plane.

    Like

    Jane @ The Blue Morpho recently posted My Playlist Right Now.

  144. Ziploc probably hasn’t contacted you back because they’re looking into stealing your cat waterbed idea without getting sued.

    Like

    Karen Marie Peterson recently posted The Consultation.

  145. Guys I found the best thing ever. I ordered one for my dog. Email @mymightdogcape@gmail.com and you can get a dog cape. FOR YOUR DOG. It’s so cute. She emailed me back saying she’s working on a website.

    Like

  146. Just leaving a comment since I don’t have wordpress. But I do follow you on FB, so maybe that is the key?

    Like

  147. I’m surprised the Ziploc people haven’t responded. Surely they knew who you were before they approached you? Then they should have expected the response they got.

    The cartoon made me laugh out loud. Woke the dog up. She wasn’t pleased.

    Like

    Sue recently posted inadequate career counseling..

  148. A while ago I had possibly the WORST time in my entire life. Beginning with a terrible breakup, a miscarriage, losing my job, and being so depressed I could not walk my dog and had to leave my back door open because getting up off the couch to let her in or out was absolutely impossible. I am now a couple years past this, and am on the general upward movement with occasional drops down again. Yay, me.

    I have now discovered the worst part about this: I missed about a year and a half of Bloggess posts. I miss CAT WATERBED, y’all!! That’s terrible. The full ramifications of this period of my life coming to light now is just devastating. I will now spend the next few weeks trying to backtrack and regain the lost time by reading all the entries from 2010 and 2011. Here’s to hoping life gets back to normal! Le sigh.😉

    Like

  149. Thank you for making me laugh through my insomnia.
    I just escaped domestic abuse. My killer is out there. #whyIstayed is trending, but no one is doing anything about it. Lost everything. Even my cat. Why are women not fighting this?

    Like

  150. I think the ziplocs should come in fashion colors (e.g. pink, purple, magenta, etc.). A woman needs options😉.

    Like

  151. Cats stuck inside Zip-Loc bags might be even more interesting than a waterbed, but than again I am not much of a fan of cats.

    Like

    TheJackB recently posted Writing, Music & Breakfast Sandwiches.

  152. I’m very interested in the cat waterbed. My cats, however, are not amused.

    Like

    Cris recently posted At Midnight....

  153. The face of Ziploc beats the shit out of the face of brown bags. Congrats.
    What helps me sleep are boxes of Franzia. Crisp White, to be exact. Good luck.

    Like

    journeymcguire2014 recently posted Baby daddy mysteries solved.

  154. Just testing the comments section of your blog, love your posts!

    Like

  155. Cat waterbeds would keep my cats entertained for a long time. Awesome idea.

    Like

  156. I hate to be the worst here, but I have several questions.
    1) Do cats desire waterbeds? If yes, how do you know?
    2) The comic had individual bags on each paw, are these like moon shoes for cats?
    3) Have you tested this on your own cat? If so, why is there not a video of that?
    4) I agree with you that having a fourth point looks more professional. Also like you, I don’t have a fourth point to make. Oops.

    Like

  157. Amusingly enough, my boss’s husband’s CC just got declined because he is in Florida. She threw a hissy fit – “I travel all the time if this kind of thing is going to happen all the time we’re going to get a new card this has never happened in all my life etc etc.”

    I welcomed her to the 21st century, told her about this post, and told her to get used to it.

    Like

  158. Could cat wear condoms?

    Like

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