How can you say no?

So, I just opened a package and I may have squealed a tiny bit and then Victor was like “NO MORE TAXIDERMY” and it was unsettling because HOW DID HE EVEN KNOW THAT?  Apparently my “I’ve-got-taxidermy-mail” squeal is very obvious.  Or perhaps he was just playing the odds.  Regardless, he was right and he came into the room to tell me to stop with all the weird taxidermy because all those eyes on him were making him paranoid.  Personally, I think that’s more his problem and he needs to sort out his emotional baggage and not bring it into our house.  He says the same thing, but about my weird taxidermy.

But this one was harder to say no to because LOOK AT HER: 

small bloggess mouse by le heart

And Victor agreed that she was hard to say no to, but only because he doesn’t talk to dead animals.  Which is sad because he’s missing out on a lot of conversations with excellent listeners.

(Made by the talented Lea Mai Nguyen of Le Heart Design.)

 

**************

And now, time for the weekly wrap-up:

shitidid

 

Shit I made in my shop (Named “EIGHT POUNDS OF UNCUT COCAINE” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

Shit that I’m vaguely involved with on the internets:

This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by Laurel Talbot, author of I Love My Gay Badger SonThis surreal short novel about a child-free couple who end up raising a gay badger son from first grade to early adulthood was written in under 30 days during National Novel Writing Month.  From the author: “My intention in writing this collection of vaguely true and hilarious stories is to put out there – for all gay, straight, human, badger, artsy, sciencey, ADHD, geniuses – that it gets better. Life will be tough, especially as you will struggle to figure out who you are and where you fit in. You may cry and want to hide for years. You may even want to give up and end it all-I know, because I have been there. Don’t. Stick with it because there will also be moments of pure joy, when you are doing things you love, surrounded by people who love the same things you love, and in those moments it will all be worth it.”  You probably need to buy it.

146 replies. read them below or add one

  1. You couldn’t say no. That is amazing (and I own no taxidermy).

    Like

    Ann St. Vincent recently posted I’m a bit stymied as to how to write my next post.

  2. Yeah, I’m thinking the squeal is justified.

    Like

  3. Do you have a lot of nightmares?

    Like

    notquiteold recently posted Who Me, Officer?.

  4. Not all taxidermy is created equal…that is world class. Now I will spend the rest of the day thinking about how I would like to be rendered.

    Like

    momus83 recently posted Throwdown Thursday: I Like the Look of Your Urn, Wanna Trade?.

  5. The taxidermy animals know what you did, Victor.

    Like

    Jillian recently posted Short Post and a Song #88: He has a point..

  6. Oh wow…that’s freaking awesome. And Since I’ve been reading your blog I’ve gone from being repelled by taxidermy, to being strangely curious, to total acceptance. You really do provide a public service.

    Liked by 1 person

    Michelle recently posted How Friday Nights Are Like Chocolate Cake.

  7. Poor little furry cute thing. Is it dead? xxx

    Like

  8. That is the MOST PERFECT taxidermy for you. There is no way to say no to that.

    Like

    Steph recently posted Free Birth Control.

  9. It’s amazing, truly. Do we know how this rodent met its end before being taxidermied? Did it live a long and fruitful life, or was it…murder?

    Like

    notesfromthebathroomfloor recently posted Muffin Gun. Breakfast at the Speed of a Bullet..

  10. That is amazing. It’s like looking at you, except mouse form.
    And her dress is mighty exquisite for a tiny creature.

    Like

  11. Oh, wait. I found the answer on her website:

    A lot of people are curious, sometimes concerned, about the origin of the mice.

    I buy bags of frozen feeder mice online, the ones intended for snake consumption. The online vendor claims they’re killed humanely, which of course I have no way of verifying, but they have no visible injuries and since they’re intended as pet food, I assume they’re not poisoned.
    I donate the bodies to my friend Alexandra, whose daughter rescues raptor birds. They need rodent meat to feed them, because that’s their natural prey.

    Like

    notesfromthebathroomfloor recently posted Muffin Gun. Breakfast at the Speed of a Bullet..

  12. That is so fabulous I can barely type and the fact that she is on a pedestal…….OMGsh….
    Totes Perf!!!!

    Like

    Momma Bird recently posted Did you see that ?.

  13. Her work is disturbingly awesome.

    Like

  14. So lets see…shopping list; giant backyard hammock – check – Squid costume for kid – check – bear costume for me – check – and oh yeah – lemurs…lots of Lemurs. those guys really know how to get to the center of a tootsie-pop

    Like

  15. The bar is now quite high for all taxidermy that enters your presence henceforth.

    Like

  16. awesome

    Like

  17. I love her! She is perfect! My home is taxidermy free, but I would have a hard time saying no to her as well.

    Like

  18. That is so cool! I can’t see why anyone would say no to that.

    Like

  19. SQUEE! I love it! Lea has talent.

    Like

  20. The costume is awesome. I will heartily recommend it to any women complaining about how skimpy women’s commercial costume designs are.
    Someone complaining that it’s “too sexualized” in 5, 4, 3, …

    Like

  21. That is amazing, and I’m generally not a fan of taxidermy.

    Like

    Kelly @ Cibatarian recently posted 2014 Texas Reds Steak and Grape Festival.

  22. Personally, I think you need an IndieGoGo for a museum. Because it would be a win-win. People would go see it, like that huge ball of twine. You could have signs on the highway, like the ones to the Crater or the ones to the Mystery Spot. They could say: Bloggessville Museum in 10 miles, 5 miles, 2 miles, 1 mile, TURN HERE and TURN AROUND, YOU MISSED IT. And they could have James Garfield and Beyonce on them. And then after the TURN AROUND one you could have another that features this new one and says, “You’ve disappointed The Bloggess. Well done.”

    Like

    earthandink recently posted never too late.

  23. This lovely creature should sit in Victor’s office, so she can always keep eyes on him. (Hmm…maybe his paranoia stems from a guilty conscience?)

    Like

    Eden recently posted Hocus Pocus: History of Halloween, plus Costumes, Pumpkins, and Decorations.

  24. That mouse may very well be the coolest thing I’ve ever seen.

    Like

    Laurie Brown recently posted The Liar’s Wife, by Mary Gordon. Panthen Books, 2014.

  25. 26
    davidbreslin101

    I can imagine this being aggressively marketed using the slogan: “Imagine YOU…..but in dead mouse form!”
    (yeah it probably is a bit niche.)

    Like

  26. You need to put that sucker in a cabinet or refrigerator, ya know somewhere she can shock and scare the hell out of people and then videotape their reactions.

    Like

  27. Cover for your second book?! I think so!

    Like

  28. Oh my…so many themes to cover here. The little mouse Bloggess is adorable; you really did create the perfect card; and I don’t know if you’d be able to wear the pajama “top” while driving but they certainly look like cozy pjs. 🙂

    Like

    kdcol recently posted A nerdy hooker?.

  29. When is someone going to make me a mini mouse with a tinfoil hat? That’s really all I want to know.

    Like

  30. I just have to ask… why do you do with the taxidermied stuff that Victor won’t let you keep? Goodwill? Garage sale? Ebay?

    Like

    Gina W. recently posted My tissue box is feeling a bit nipply.

  31. Wait, are the eyes of taxidermied animals their actual eyes? I think the eye thing might be what weirds me out about it. Actually no, even the eyes in Baby Borns used to freak me out. Although anything made in the likeness of yourself is exciting so I get why you’d like it. I LOVE anything that even has my name on it – even if it’s an author using ‘rosy’ as an adjective… This is why Lorde makes me feel shifty when she sings “Only bad people live to see their likeness set in stone, what does that make me?” Eye weirdness aside, this is kinda cool.

    Like

    rosyroland recently posted Roland Scarbahound: An Ode to an Unwanted Child..

  32. You know you are adored when fans start sending you dead animals dressed up like you. I mean, most people wouldn’t take it like that, but you definitely should.

    She’s fabulous!

    Like

    Manicmom recently posted Stegosauri, Scooby, and Snail Mail.

  33. Fantazamazing!
    But tell Victor she needs a blue sister swinging in a birdcage to be complete.

    Like

  34. Yea, of all your taxidermy.. you just can’t say no to this one!

    Like

  35. Those pyjamas are a little bit too John Irving.

    Like

  36. I think I know what the “I’ve-got-taxidermy-mail” squeal sounds like because I’m pretty sure I just made it too looking at that picture. That is beyond amazeballs.

    Like

  37. Love the description and reviews on the bear suit.

    Like

  38. I wonder who was the first to stuff a dead animal and bring in the house? It had to have been a redneck. I have two black bears and a hog. They like to dress up at Christmas.

    Like

    snoogiefisk recently posted Don’t read this!.

  39. That is the cutest thing ever! Although it is a mouse and my cat may decide it’s a chew toy, but it’s the cutest thing ever!!!

    Like

  40. I’m not even a huge fan of taxidermy but she is gorgeous.

    Like

  41. BEST. DEAD. MOUSE. EVER. PERIOD.

    Like

  42. I think Victor’s just jealous because he never gets interesting mail. That mouse is amazeballs.

    Like

  43. I wonder if I would get kicked out of the zoo for bringing lollipops to the lemurs? Everyone deserves a lollipop and they are so cute. Hmm… Worth it.

    Like

  44. Those lemurs should be the new ad campaign for tootsie pops.
    I’d love to get that birthday card.
    I love that Victor recognizes your “I’ve got taxidermy mail” squeal. TShe’s an awesome addition to your collection.
    Cheers!

    Like

  45. It’s gorgeous. There’s no way you could say no.

    Like

    sue recently posted It's hard to understand other people's relationships.

  46. You can’t say no to surprise taxidermy. Ever since Steve Irwin yelled, “There’s 13 lemurs!” (with Australian enthusiasm) my family has been a little obsessed.

    Like

    kstewand4cats recently posted Signs of Fall: An Exciting List and Lizards.

  47. That is sofa king awesome! There will never be anything better. Ever!

    Like

  48. Let me add you’ll be happy to know that Innamorato doesn’t kill any animals and acquires all her materials ethically. Nothing is killed expressly for her art. She uses roadkill, scrap skins from other taxidermists, fabric and natural materials.

    Like

  49. My world is clearly too small as I’ve never, ever come across mouse taxidermy. Who knew? I must admit it is bad-assed in the strangest possible way. Does that make it (her?) the newest strangeling in this group?

    Like

    fillyourownglass recently posted On Filling Your Own Glass.

  50. That little mouse is EPIC! And it should totally be sitting on your desk like forever!

    Like

  51. That is amazing. And reminded me of a commercial I saw that reminded me of you. Please please please tell me you have see “Dead Mouse Theater”! I don’t work for Tomcat or have anything to gain here other than their comercial reminding me of you.

    http://deadmousetheatre.tumblr.com/

    Like

  52. No no, you don’t understand. I NEED one of those. It’s PERFECT!!! ohmyfuckinggoodness

    Like

  53. Best. (Jenny Lawson) Gift. Ever.

    So happy for you. Fuck Victor… and of course, I mean that in the best way possible.😉

    Like

    emelle recently posted Another productive and somewhat lucrative weekend....

  54. Did you name her The Mousess? She is a mouse right? I’m not very good with taxidermy, but I’m trying…

    Like

  55. I read this to my husby. He immediately went back to whatever he was doing on his computer muttering…I’m just going to stay over here…

    Like

  56. Now am I getting Facebook ads for bear costumes…

    Like

  57. Adorable.

    Like

    Kathleen recently posted Twisted Cords.

  58. She is naturally beautiful which makes me wonder why she chose to be a brunette instead of her natural shade. I mean–does she think we can’t tell?🙂

    Like

    candidkay recently posted Parenting books I meant to burn.

  59. Poor little mousie! Why must animals die to make you happy? Huh? Huh?

    Like

  60. First, the Bloggess mouse is amazing!

    Second, was it a real living mouse at one point?

    Like

    Suheiry Feliciano recently posted 5 Things to Try in October.

  61. She is adorable! I imagine Chinese workers salving day and night making these!

    Like

  62. oow! she is the dead mouse you

    Like

  63. So…very…adorable. Can’t say no!

    Like

  64. that is freaking brilliant! really love that! not for me, but perfect for you! I can see why you would squeal!

    Like

  65. Yeah, she was totally meant to be yours…it is practically like winning an Oscar to receive such a gift.

    Like

    The Dose of Reality recently posted School Breaks Are The Best–Said No Mom Ever.

  66. I am not a taxidermy person. But that…I would have.

    Like

  67. I am guessing that Victor will not let you share a bed with him if you are wearing that costume. Way too many eyes. (And I am stuck without any contractions in my sentences because my computer has been possessed and thinks è is an apostrophe, among other things.)

    Like

  68. True Confessions: I’ve always been a skootch more Team Victor when it comes to your undead creatures, but this little lady is beyond adorable. Apparently I also have an “I’ve-got-taxidermy-mail” squeal, and today was its debut. Enjoy your lovely tiny hairy likeness!!

    Like

    Lady Chardonnay recently posted "Gorgeous hair is the best revenge." —Ivana Trump.

  69. I clicked on that pajamas link, and ads for full-grown bear costumes are following me all across the internet.

    Like

  70. She is amazing and perfect. You should put her in a very prominent place in your house. PS…thanks for the video of lemurs eating lollipops. Truly made my day.

    Like

  71. please, please, pretty please, can you make a poster of the “pretty bizarre” quote? it needs to be in my office.

    Like

  72. Every time you post a picture of new taxidermy, I think about how one of these days (when she’s much older), Hailey is going to bring home that special young man, and about how he’ll either roll with the weird, or run away screaming.

    Like

    Shelley J recently posted I'll have the tall stack and a glass of your finest maple, please.

  73. I hate mice and am not a fan of taxidermy, but that is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen.

    Like

  74. Since I went and looked at the link to the pajamas, all my side bar ads have been for adult bear costumes. I’m not sure this is a good thing.

    Like

  75. She is soooo cute! Now its time to find one the looks like victor

    Like

  76. I should know better than to click on any Amazon links. Now every add on every webpage is for bear costumes. I guess that’s better than wireless routers or slipper socks or whatever else I searched for last.

    I clicked on the Le Heart Design link too, but sadly no ads for super cute taxidermied mice have shown up yet. Is it bad I want a vampire mouse?

    Like

  77. Wow, Laurie and I must surf the same web pages. How freaky is that?

    Like

  78. Um so that’s pretty much the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. I know what my 2 year old is getting from Santa.

    Like

    Moni recently posted Always Check for Clowns.

  79. She is so cute – I think she’s SMILING!! Is her name Jenny perhaps or something even fancier?

    Like

  80. That is so awesome!

    Like

  81. She is freaking ADORABLE!!! Don’t you dare not keep her!

    Like

  82. How could you not squeal at that? How could HE not squeal at that? Omg, too funny!

    Like

    stef recently posted The Niña, The Pinta, and The WHY ARE THERE NO BANKS OPEN?!?.

  83. Well played, Bloggess. I innocently clicked on the “warm pajamas” link and am now being stalked by bear costume ads no matter where I run to on the internet. My Amazon browsing history is already weird enough, but I can always count on you to kick it up another notch.

    Like

  84. I would definitely squeal if that little mouse turned up in my mail! Not for the same reason you did, I guess. Still, as taxidermy goes, she’s super-cute and just perfect for you. The point of presents is that person receiving them likes them, surely?

    Like

    Eleanorjane recently posted Craving wine for autumn - burgundy, merlot, sangria, claret.

  85. That is a fabulous piece of taxidermy.

    Like

  86. Totally adorable, but I would’ve held out for a purple dress.

    Like

    terib19 recently posted Sayreville High School football hazing..........

  87. That is THE most amazing piece of taxidermy I’ve ever scene. Wow

    Like

  88. I’m with V on this one… I don’t like when dead animals (or birds dead or alive) stare at me.

    Like

    Lauren recently posted A Mommy and Me Date at the Malibu Getty.

  89. Okay. That’s pretty darn impressive and very cool. If someone mailed me taxidermy, I would know I have truly made it.

    Like

  90. She is exquisite!

    Like

  91. That is so completely adorable!!! Thanks to you, I don’t feel that my granddaughter is completely crazy for “rescuing” a taxidermied squirrel from the neighbor’s garage sale leftover pile! She loves it even more because it keeps me from wanting to be in her room at all.

    Like

  92. I get the eyes thing.. one night my man turned all my daughter’s stuffed animals (fake ones)to LOOK at me while I slept. I was mortified!

    Like

    itzybellababy recently posted #BringBackOurGirls, How Two Girls Escaped.

  93. OHMYGAWD! it’s a you-mouse. I’d squeal like a mofo too.

    Like

  94. I have to admit, I’m a little disappointed there was no link to an actual strangling.

    And I love your new taxidermy, she is lovely!

    Like

  95. OMG, this is a book cover! It’s perfect.

    Like

  96. She’s beautiful! You have to keep her!

    Like

  97. Oh, I dig. I totally dig. This is perfect. I agree, this should be the cover of your next book.

    Like

  98. 101
    elizabeth p

    That should be like a fucking award everyone can win.

    Like

  99. I was at my vet today and overheard the vet techs talking about a dog that had to have emergency surgery today because it ate an entire taxidermied mouse.🙂 If we did not live so far from you, I’d wonder if it was one of your mice.

    Like

  100. It’s like an awesomeness award that should be displayed prominently and carried with you EVERYWHERE. Especially if you’re by yourself, so you’d have completely badass mouse-twin company to talk to.

    Like

  101. I squealed, too! It’s perfect!

    Like

  102. She is lovely! I still think that one day I will have a hedgehog of my very own, to dress as I see fit!

    Like

  103. Fabulous!

    Like

  104. I hate rodents with like a full on body shaking, trembling reaction. I mean, college biology class could’ve doubled for psych when it came to freeze dried rats.

    And even I couldn’t say no to that.

    Like

    The Imp recently posted Happy Thanksgiving!.

  105. I am still sure that one day I will have a Hedgehog of my own. To dress as I see fit. I love Hedgehogs.

    Like

  106. That is the cutest thing ever. I think she deserves a Christmas tree or a pumpkin all her own. Maybe she could live on the top of it complete with a tasteful spotlight. Probably Victor would love it because then she/you/huh would be decor.

    Like

  107. Are you going to make a t-shirt for Stangeling also? I don’t have a car and although I love you to death buying a car for the bumper sticker is a bit too much I think. : )

    Like

  108. I have never commented before but had to say that is AWESOME.

    Like

  109. That animal is adorable! And really you should be allowed to get her because she fits in with the red dress campaign. I say call dibs on that cutie!

    Like

  110. She is a thing of beauty and a joy to behold

    Like

  111. That is just amazing! NO ONE could say no to that.

    Like

  112. I still can’t quite figure how they did it. Great art work. This ranks up there with those sculptures that are actually paper and you can fan it out into some mush looking stuff…

    Like

    Michelle Grewe recently posted If I were Bewitched, I'd Mess with My Old Neighbors and Take Over the World.

  113. Haha. Thank you for helping me fix my feed issues on this. I thought my feed wasn’t working again, but really I had my old blogspot address from before switching to wordpress listed as my main site.

    Like

    Michelle Grewe recently posted Jesus Prayer of the Desert Monks.

  114. I don’t really get taxidermy, but that one I want! squeal away!

    Like

    Mary-Anne recently posted Mustard Pickles.

  115. Of COURSE, you had to have that! What is WRONG with Victor???

    Like

  116. OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!! Did it sound like that?!? I think she could make a living out of creating taxidermied versions of famous people.

    Like

  117. 120
    Sandi Watson

    Are you effing kidding?!! That thing is freaky cool!!

    Like

  118. 121
    Dani Whitener

    She is perfect! And I’m wiping tears of laughter away from clicking on the “pajamas” you were looking at. I say go for it.

    Like

  119. Wow! She’s gorgeous.

    Like

  120. I love that. She’s perfect. Tell Victor I said he’s being an old fuddy-duddy if he doesn’t like her.

    Like

  121. 124
    Colleen Baker

    I had to laugh out loud when I first saw her standing there….on her own perch. But she is so cute and so you that I just fell in love! Victor does not know what he is missing out on…..

    Like

  122. In the highly unlikely event that anyone started sending me taxidermy in the post, I think I’d actually squeal too, granted it would be for an entirely different reason because I’m a bit of a wimp when it comes to dead rodents. Love rodents too actually. In fact any animal other than a cat or dog pretty much terrifies me…. Lame I know.

    Like

    PinkNoam recently posted Viral Blogging.

  123. In a red dress no less. Beauty!

    Like

    Kristine @ MumRevised recently posted Emergency Room Wisdom Part IV. The Kristine wing opens this spring..

  124. I wish that card had come out a few weeks ago. My daughter just had a birthday and it would have been perfect for her. My very own strangeling Maggie got me hooked on you with the Beyonce post.

    Like

  125. I will cop to the fact that taxidermy freaks me out a little, and even I squee-ed when I saw this. Perfection…fantastic, amazing perfection.

    Like

  126. My imaginary alter-ego’s father was a freelance taxidermist, who stuffed a pair of gay ferrets for Prince Philip.

    Like

    Bryan Hemming recently posted Antje’s Pizza Picnic.

  127. Taxidermy teaches us about foreign culture. The German diplomatic corps agrees: http://www.germany.info/Vertretung/usa/en/__pr/GIC/TWIG__WoW/2014/40-Wolpertinger.html

    Like

  128. Lea Mai Nguyen is truly talented, his art is amazing, even I squealed when I saw it. then I went to his site and now I want me some mices.

    Like

  129. At the local Antique Mall there are some taxidermied animals. I’d like to name one of them “The Blogess” so I could have meaningful conversations with her and perhaps decorate her for special occasions. (It’s ok – the people there know me). There’s a deer (head only), a boar (head only) and a fox (entire but slightly mangy). Which One shall it be???
    meow meow meow

    Like

  130. This brought taxidermy to a new level. Love it.

    Like

    Laurie recently posted My Top Five Songs….

  131. She is amazing, eloquent despite her silence, and a damned snappy dresser. Victor should PROUDLY disply her on his desk–he could rehearse conversations with you so he doesn’t come out of the real ones feeling like he put his foot in his mouth again. the Bloggess mouse could be his good luck charm!

    Like

  132. Someone probably already sent this to you but just in case http://www.vice.com/read/women-are-dominating-the-rogue-taxidermy-scene-666

    Thanks for the great blog, by the way.

    Like

    John Bloomberg-Rissman recently posted In the House of the Hangman 1823.

  133. I am in need of a red dress….is anyone still doing this?

    Like

  134. She is perfect and beautiful. I’m kind of with Victor on the taxidermy situation, but I could never say not to her!

    Like

    Tara recently posted Todays Theme: Me and the Dalai Lama? We're the same. He said so..

  135. If you get those pajamas could you come and wear them at my office and scare away the creepy/smelly and constantly urinating in front of me homeless dude…he sleeps on the stairs in front of the office door.

    Like

  136. She is amazing🙂

    Like

  137. SHE IS PERFECT.

    Like

    Amy | Toothbrush Travels recently posted Camp Nou.

  138. This could help with the warm pajama issue. It’s a little more affordable and should be back in stock soon! http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/f42a/

    Like

  139. 142
    Leslie Meyer

    I’m probably far behind the times, but Etsy just released a collection
    of felted animals that look real. Perhaps released is the wrong word…
    Emailed me the wonder that is felted animals which you couldn’t possibly
    catch any flack for because they are felt. (They look real. Amazing.)

    https://www.etsy.com/listing/127727312/similar?ex=etsy_finds&ref=etsy_finds&utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=etsy_finds_101614_16417992706_0_0&campaign_label=etsy_finds&euid=8oBVR5NFiyyYYEetnu-G10QQ1ko-&eaid=77891197&redirect=1&filters=dolls_and_miniatures+animals

    Like

  140. I am not a fan of taxidermy, and even I like that one. Haha

    Like

    Vazula recently posted The Great Rush of Patch 6.0.

  141. It is perfection.

    Like

  142. Someone knows you and love you. That mouse is so cute

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s