TEAM RICKMAN

I was talking to a girlfriend about how you could divide everyone in the world into people who do or do not have a crush on Alan Rickman and she agreed, saying, “Oh he’s hot. I would totes swipe right for him.”

And I was like, “Ew.  You should already be wiping right.  Do you not wipe unless you think you’re going to get lucky?  Because that’s how you get a urinary tract infection.”

Turns out that she said she’d “swipe right” which is apparently what you do on the Tinder dating app when you like someone’s picture and are interested in them.  That made more sense but I can’t help but think that maybe some of these people are single because of communication issues like this where you never have a second date because the person thinks you don’t wipe correctly.  Long story short, I think Tinder is trying to keep people single in order to keep up demand for their product.

PS. Please wipe correctly.

PPS.  Also, stop using the word “totes.”  Unless you’re using it ironically.  Or you’re talking about plural tote bags.

PPPS.  #TeamRickman

222 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Totes, for the many times people talk about the tote bag industry.

    Like

  2. Ever since Sense and Sensibility….

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Buahahaha, I agree to everything in this post 1,000%.

    Like

    Tempest Rose recently posted The Day of the Lucky Three-leaf Clovers.

  4. I am totally Team Rickman, but I am too old to be totes Team Rickman (as is anyone over the age of 16). I am also totally in favor of proper wiping techniques. Luckily I am totally too old and too married for Tinder (or totes).

    Like

    fillyourownglass recently posted Warning: Spontaneity May Result In My Combustion.

  5. 5
    Robert in Chicago

    Alan Rickman now, or Alan Rickman as of, say, Die Hard? Because if you’re going to bother choosing a celebrity to be your fantasy sex object, you might as well choose one in their sexual prime.

    Like

  6. Ditto for “adorbs.” It creeps me out.

    (Also: serious headcanon for Snape was that he’s all secretly byronic and tragic and whatnot. So yeah, Team Rickman.)

    Like

    Wendy recently posted Teal Gem Necklace and Earring Set with black and aqua beads by NerdyNecklaces.

  7. I need to know what totes are in the context of this post. But in the context of this post I’m terrified to Google it.

    Like

    A Crock of Schmidt recently posted A Rare and Wonderful Children’s Book Called Cats.

  8. All dating sites should include a category for wrong-way wipers.

    Like

    notquiteold recently posted Guilt-Gone Girl.

  9. But, but, but…. what about mah goats??!

    Like

    theBADhousewife recently posted More Word Vomit from an ACON.

  10. OMG. I love Rickman!!!
    Totes agree on proper wiping practices.

    Like

  11. haha, I JUST told someone 5 minutes ago that I only used “totes” ironically. Actually it was “totes adorbs” but still.
    Also #TeamRickmanFOREVEROMGILOVEHIMSOMUCH

    Like

    Shannon akaMonty recently posted THINK TWICE, CREEP, it's MI VIDA LOCA..

  12. Totally Team Rickman, except in Notting Hill because Emma Thompson is such a better woman than Miss “It’s all for you”.

    Also, SWIPER NO SWIPING.

    Like

    Kara recently posted Orphan Black – I Am Not Your Weapon.

  13. my husband thinks i am weird for having a crush on alan rickman.

    Like

  14. p.s. he is delightful in the movie “snow cake.” if you haven’t seen it, you should.

    Like

  15. I have many, many totes and I just don’t even talk about it. Ewwwww.

    Like

  16. Totally Team Rickman since I saw Truly, Madly, Deeply years ago. Totally for wiping right. Not so totally for totes. I thought tinder was something you used to get a fire starter . . . oh. I get it.

    Like

  17. Always Team Rickman. Forever.

    Like

  18. i thought it was front to back unless you mean Tinder…

    Like

    susielindau recently posted Meet the Voice of Siri! An Interview with Susan Bennett..

  19. 19
    Cheryl in Wisconsin

    Team Rickman roll call: Here!

    Like

  20. All Rickman, all the time.

    Like

  21. Rickman is one of the coolest mammals on Earth, its true.
    His awesomeness makes angels weep.

    Like

    The Hook recently posted Rooms 4054 – 4056: Everybody Hates Eddie.

  22. Totally swipe right for Alan Rickman.

    Like

  23. I want aware there was even a question about Alan Rickman. I just assumed everyone loved him. And based on all these comments, it looks like I was totes correct!😀

    Like

    TheFakeGourmet recently posted The mark of a good recipe — making it over and over!.

  24. Completely agree that I have been #TeamRickman since Truly, Madly, Deeply and I was so happy to be right about Snape all along

    Like

  25. #TeamAlanRickman. And coincidentally, #TeamOnlyGirlInTheSeventhGradeWithInappropriateFeelingsForProfessorSnape.

    Like

    gallinaround recently posted We Get It, Snow..

  26. Let’s talk Dogma Rickman – even without his man parts.

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  27. 27
    Sherry Silguero

    #teamrickman, always

    Like

  28. Always. #totesteamrickman

    Like

  29. Hell yes, Team Rickman.

    Also, if he ever googles himself for fun, now his name will be matched with wiping “right.” And that’s just…well it’s definitely something. Probably not expected of Professor Snape.

    Like

    Jess@NoPithyPhrase recently posted I Dub Thee "Herman the Moulien"* (pronunciation updated).

  30. Always.

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  31. That reminds me, it’s been too long since I’ve seen Truly, Madly, Deeply!

    Like

  32. You can tell how old and married I am(happily for 22 years) when you quoted your friend as saying swipe right I was wondering if it was weird Dora the Explore Swiper the fox reference.. I was wondering if she thought he was foxy and was going to steal him like Swiper tries to do in Dora. I could see trying to steal him for herself, makes sense to me.

    Like

  33. You should not say totes unless you are talking about a tote bag or you are 10 years old.

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  34. Always…

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  35. back of the line ladies, i’ve been waiting since the late 80s for a crack at him!

    Like

  36. That’s just totes cray. So this Tinder app swiped the whole meaning of wiping right??

    Like

    kdcol recently posted The muffin chronicles.

  37. #TeamRickman from the way back days when he read Edmund Spenser to Kate Winslet, oh yeah baby

    Like

  38. Front to back people. Wipe front to back😀

    Like

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  39. Totally Rickman, ever since Prince of Thieves “Because it’ll hurt more, you twit!”

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  40. Totes #teamrickman assuming he wipes right.

    Like

  41. If you’re on teamrickman and you haven’t treated yourself to this yet, you should. Someone put Severus Snape’s scenes into chronological order:

    Like

    Anubis Bard recently posted Stalactites of ice.

  42. I saw Alan Rickman in a play on Broadway called Seminar in which he played an English professor that all the chicks wanted to bang. There’s actually a lovely little monologue where he talks about Lily Rabe’s character with his balls in her mouth.

    Like

    Sara Beth recently posted I've got a blank space, baby....

  43. If he were just some moody guy in a bar (and yes, he would be the moody guy) I would be like “Uck!” – But now.. sexy moody guy on the big screen who makes me go “WHYTHEHELLDOISQUEEFORTHISDUDE?”

    Like

  44. saw the words Team Rickman and don’t remember anything else about your post. All I can think about now is Alan Rickman. Everybody leave me alone. I’m busy.

    Like

  45. But he played Tibault…and he cheated on Emma Thompson because he was bored….twice, evidently…
    Yeah, I can see #teamrickman….

    Like

  46. Young people scare me.

    Like

    Cassandra recently posted Snowholes.

  47. Team Rickman, if only because of that sexy voice. I don’t have to swipe or wipe anything to hear him do I?

    Like

  48. I fucking LOVE Alan Rickman. Alan Rickman is hot…HOT. Damn.

    Like

    Michelle recently posted Desperado.

  49. You know you’ve reached the right level of man-crushiness when you find Alan Rickman more attractive than either Kevin Costner or Christian Slater in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. (This does not apply if you are under 30).

    Like

  50. Oh, Laneycakes, I totes read your hashtag wrong.
    Squee. For.

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  51. Love Alan Rickman in anything he does. Also Totes to some of us refers to practical but not particularly attractive brand of Mom boots.

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  52. Ohhh…and to the ‘totes’ person.. (can’t remember which comment…don’t care enough to look it up): Are you the totes police? How does one get that job? I bet it totes pays great.

    totes.

    Like

    Michelle recently posted Desperado.

  53. On the other hand…pretty sure if I said totes at home, my 16 yo would scorch me with a death glare.

    Like

  54. Yeah, he’s hot…and I’m just not going to tell my husband I think that, because, well, it’s easier that way.

    Like

  55. Totally Team Rickman. The other day my baby brother posted a youtube link that was a compilation of all of Snape’s scenes. It made me feel all the feels.

    Like

  56. Just had a total mind conversation about saying “totes” and “adorb”. Seriously the stupidest slang ever. And somebody shoot me if I ever say “amazeballs” in a conversation and mean it in a non-ironic, non-sarcastic way!!!! It’s literally worse than literally not meaning literally anymore!

    Like

  57. Team Rickman since ‘Truly, Madly, Deeply’ with Emma Thompson. Yes, I am that old.😉

    Like

  58. When I was young I got really sad for weeks when I realized that I couldn’t actually marry Colonel Brandon.

    Like

  59. Thumbs up for Rickman. Thumbs down for bladder infections (and the use of the word ‘totes’)

    Like

    The Dusty Parachute recently posted Shut the F*ck Up – A Poem for Clueless Parents.

  60. I want Rickman as my designated stand in parent for when my daughter gets in trouble. I feel she would take a lecture from him way more seriously then she does me. Plus I’ll get to stand back and bask in his awesomness.

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  61. Definitely TeamRickman since Truly, Madly, Deeply. I do agree with Kara that his character is a jerk and I don’t like him, but it’s in Love Actually not Notting Hill. Now for your listening pleasure, Alan Rickman reading Sonnet 130: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06qrlwQNdpo You’re welcome.

    Like

  62. Definitely Team Rickman!

    Incidentally, I met my boyfriend on Tinder. We both swiped right.

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  63. #TeamRickman forever.

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  64. I see your Slothzilla and raise you a Slothcano.

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  65. #TEAMRICKMAN – ever since Truly, Madly, Deeply. Yum.

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  66. I vote yes for Rickman, yes for wiping right (every time), no to tinder, and a big fat HELL to the no to using “totes” unless you’re referring to a reusable shopping bag…then yes, because saving the environment.

    Like

  67. I’m a complete #TeamRickman

    Like

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  68. Team Rickman!

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  69. I am totally wearing Totes right now. They are my go to old lady snow boots

    Like

  70. From what I’ve seen of Tinder, the people on it are already doing a bang-up job of keeping themselves single.

    Like

    Spoken Like A True Nut recently posted The butt dial of destiny..

  71. Team Possibly Rickman.. ? I’m not sure.

    And, yes– totes are things you carry stuff in. Because, like, EVERYone totally knows that “totally” is the correct usage in that phrase.

    Like

    stef recently posted Menopausal Mornings and Such.

  72. First, #teamrickman!

    Second, my daughter started saying “totes” after she met a drama teacher. Every time I hear/read that word I feel compelled to make a guttural growling noise. This thing has been banned from my house. I suppose this is how I know that I have become old.

    Like

    Michelle recently posted Liebster Award Nomination.

  73. Yes, Snape! I’m “totes” stealing the Snape video. Thanks to Anibus Bard.

    Like

  74. #teamrickman
    #teamtotallynottotes
    #teambacktofront

    Like

    jennnielynn recently posted It’s All About Perspective.

  75. Because Alan Rickman….

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  76. Sorry, that should have been #teamfronttoback.
    Gonna go take a cranberry pill now.

    Like

    jennnielynn recently posted It’s All About Perspective.

  77. I am very happy to say that Alan Rickman is not too young for me (only twoyears) and still totally hot!

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  78. Team Rickman…ever since that classic movie Calendar Girl starring Kevin Kline and him and (I think) Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio

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  79. I’m more of a Conan O’Brien fan.

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  80. Um, he’s amazing, but like no thank you. Han Solo please.

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    Ashleigh recently posted Lucky, Blessed, and Depressed..

  81. I’m not sure what the obsession with Rickman as Snape is, when clearly his best role was in Die Hard!!!😀 Hans Gruber for the win.

    Liked by 1 person

  82. This is all kinds of confusing to me. Shouldn’t you be wiping front to back? Also I have no idea what Tinder is😦

    Like

    trillie recently posted I read 50 Shades of Grey so you won't have to.

  83. Ok nvm I just got that. Right as in not wrong. I really wish WordPress would let people edit their comments :s

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  84. Not only a crush on Alan Rickman, but a crush on Alan Rickman’s voice!

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  85. Team Rickman. He can eat crackers in my bed any day.

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  86. Most definitely yes to Rickman. Love at third sight when I saw Dogma (I was finally old enough to appreciate him). Thank you binkiebot (#26) for mentioning it for everyone else.😀 I HATE “totes,” adorbs,” and all of the rest and when I hear an adult say it, it takes much energy not to punch them in the throat (and also wash their mouth out with soap).

    Like

  87. Toting swipes!? I’ve heard of smoking some good shit, but went too far.

    Like

    mousebert recently posted Be Brave and Dare to Be.

  88. Toting swipes!? I’ve heard of smoking some good shit, but THIS went too far.

    Why oh why do I only catch errors after hitting the post button?

    Like

  89. It is now year of the sheep/goat. Which means I’ll totes be outta control using totes mcgoats. It can’t be helped.

    Liked by 1 person

    Kelly @ Cibatarian recently posted Laissez Les Bon Temps Rouler, Y'all!.

  90. You use “drug” as a past tense of “drag,” so you don’t get to sneer at “totes.”
    If you’re “wiping right” you’re doing it wrong. Front to back, dear.
    I’m not sure how Victor responded to this, but however it was, he’s right, because Victor.

    Like

  91. OMG I love/lust Rickman. So talented, and sexy and awesome. And even sexy-creepy. There could be something a little wrong with me. But not him! Be still my libido!

    Like

  92. 94
    Robin Berthelet

    Alright! Slothcano gets my vote

    Like

  93. Alan Rickman at any age is swoon worthy, but particularly in “Truly Madly Deeply” and “Die Hard”

    Like

  94. 96
    happyhourmary

    Really, he’s an excellent good guy and an excellent bad guy and just a great actor all around.

    Like

  95. Kelley #53 thank you so much for the link.

    I need to spend some time by myself now.

    Like

  96. There are only 2 people in this woed. Those who have a crush on Alan Rickman…and those who are in denial about their crush on Alan Richman.

    Like

    standrewslynx recently posted Grad School Cycles.

  97. Team Alan Rickman AND Jon Stewart

    Liked by 1 person

  98. I always crushed on Alan Rickman until he cheated on his wife in “Love Actually.” Then I decided he was just one of those guys. Sorry, but I have to hold it against him.

    Like

  99. A friend and I have had many a conversation about the joys of Rickman. Just don’t ask me to choose between him and Kenneth Branagh, because I don’t think I could.

    Ironically, I used “totes adorbs” earlier today, also ironically, and possibly for both the first and last time ever.

    Like

  100. Re: comment #12. Doh, not Notting Hill – Love Actually.

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  101. Hans Gruber – sexiest villain like EVER!

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  102. What about totes, the galoshes?

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    Janet Coburn recently posted Whitewashing: Where’s the Line?.

  103. Rickman…. Truly, Madly, Deeply.
    The. End.

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  104. I’m Team Rickman, as he’s totes adorbs! (gawd, I feel old…)

    Like

  105. Team Emma Thompson, for those of us who like ladies!

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  106. There is only one team, and it is Team Rickman. How could anyone feel otherwise?

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  107. Totes and adorbs hurt my head, but I majored in English, so I’m obviously horrible. I used to feel strange about my Rickman obsession, but you know? “Give me an occupation, Miss Dashwood, or I shall run mad.” How am I supposed to react to that? I am but a woman, after all.

    Like

  108. Yes. All of this.

    Truly, Madly, Deeply.

    swoons

    Like

    peady recently posted No One Needs To Know Right Now.

  109. 112
    s.m. stanley

    Team Rickman!!

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  110. Go Team Rickman!!!!

    By the way, I once touched him on the bottom. Truly. So I win.

    And I totes swiped right.

    Like

    notmymother recently posted Ode to an old home.

  111. Omg. You’re talking about Professor Snape. I will never be able to think of him as anything but–and sexy does not come to mind. I do have a secret crush on Steve Carrell, but that’s about as far as I go into unusual:).

    Like

    candidkay recently posted Achieving the opposite of a spiritual quickie.

  112. I would totally Wipe Right For Rickman.

    And oh god oh god, please no “totes”, “adorbs”, or, dear god, “cray cray”.

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  113. so totes #teamRickman

    Like

  114. One of my co-workers dresses as Prof. Snape at every opportunity. I don’t know what that says about our jobs. Yes, to Rickman except for in Love Actually (yes, to Hugh Grant, Colin Firth and pre-Rick Grimes Andrew Lincoln as replacements.)

    Like

    kstewand4cats recently posted Tails of Temptation.

  115. I totes love you to death, but for the love of Rickman please don’t use the word “girlfriend” to describe a female friend unless you are also spooning/holding hands in public/smushing your face together with that person. It’s totes heteronormative.

    Like

  116. 119
    greenearthgirl4

    I love you to death, but for the love of Rickman please don’t use the word “girlfriend” to describe a female friend unless you’re also spooning/holding hands in public/smushing your faces together with that person. It’s totes heteronormative.

    Like

  117. Can you be #TeamRickman without the willingness to swipe right for that? I think swiping right might break one of my marital vows…although now I’m thinking about it, wiping right is something we should all have enshrined in our vows. (You know, just in case. That, and brushing your teeth and wearing clean socks. #hygieneclause.)

    Like

  118. 121
    feuilletoniste

    It’s moments like this that I know I have truly found my people.

    Like

  119. Not only would I swipe right for Mr. Rickman, but I would also contract a UTI.

    Like

    Psychobabble recently posted A Day Not Entirely My Own.

  120. Rickman! Be my girlfriend? 😉

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  121. Guess I need to check out this truly madly deeply thing. I’m #TeamRickman for Galaxy Quest and Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. AND all the HP movies. I think I’m attracted to him for different reasons than the rest. :\
    He cracks me up and I think that is sexy.

    Like

  122. Can we also agree to eliminate “preggers”, “cray cray”, and “bae”?

    Oh, and Alan Rickman in Robin Hood Prince of Thieves!?! I never understood what Maid Marion saw in Robin Hood when the Sheriff was smokin’!

    Like

  123. Always…

    Like

  124. I would totally marry Alan Rickman.. whether he wanted me to or not. Yes, I know how that sounded. And yes, I meant it how it was taken. TeamRickman! because I still haven’t figured out the hashtag thing

    Like

    onanotherfreakingmission recently posted Sex and Altoids.

  125. There was a girl on the Bachelor who apparently didn’t shower regularly, and the guy was totes into her into he found out she was craycray. So maybe some people dig that shit (pun intended). And by “people,” I mean Alan Rickman.

    Like

  126. 129
    pepperjackcandy

    I think my mom used to use a feminine wipe called Totes back in the day. While trying to find out if I was recalling correctly, I found one called Swipes. So there’s that.

    I find Alan Rickman’s voice to be very sexy, but his physical presence does nothing for me. I guess I’d be up for phone sex with him, but not much else. I’m not sure where that puts me.

    Like

  127. I’m more #TeamBrianMay. Just standing here in line for the tote bags.

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  128. Team Rickman forever

    Like

  129. Guess what just turned up in my FB account from the paper crafting group?
    ‘No!!…
    http://domesticexecutiveonline.com/2012/02/because-thebloggess-rocks-juanitaweasel/
    Amazing Scrapbooking Ideas

    I just don’t want to know about poppers or totes! too messy! I’, with Juanita!

    Like

  130. My mum once had a conversation with some people who – she thought – were members of the Bedpan Society. Well, OK, that makes some sense – people collect all sorts of things, so chamber pots sound like an amusing hobby.

    But it began to appear that they weren’t just ‘collecting’ these bedpans. As one of them said after a time, a key lesson is the importance of sitting properly – good posture makes an enormous difference. That should conjure much the same mental image in your minds that my mum had. And over the next few minutes the conversation began to get even more surreal until Mum eventually had to stop and said something like, ‘I’m sorry, what? You did say the Bedpan Society, right?’ And they said no, back pain.

    Like

  131. Can you only have a crush on Alan Rickman’s voice? Because I’d totes be into that.

    Like

    Anna G recently posted Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014).

  132. HILARIOUS! My daughter says totes and always confuses me but sadly I knew what swipe right meant although I’ve been very unlucky on that ap. I’ve only had perverts message me so I got off.

    Like

    Loida recently posted Embracing 45 with Open Arms.

  133. Huge fan of Snape, but gosh…would not wipe or swipe for Alan Rickman (sorry, no offense, Alan).

    Like

  134. I don’t know anything about toting wipes or swiping totes or whatever the hell we’re talking about, but I do know I would definitely do Alan Rickman anyway he would like to do it.

    Like

    Sheila Blanchette recently posted Turn The Page.

  135. #teamrickman all the way baby!!!!

    Like

  136. Yes yes team Rickman.

    However, assuming Victor agrees, I feel there is a lot of possible blog content from you exploring Tinder. Please please please set up a Bloggess Tinder account?

    Like

  137. Love Alan Rickman. I guess I am old, I don’t get what totes means at all. I use Tinder to light our woodstove.

    Like

  138. I don’t know who that is😦

    Like

  139. I hate “totes”. My friend used to taunt me with it as I hate it so much. But then she doesn’t like adorbs so we have a stand off. lol
    Team Rickman all the way.

    Like

    Kattie recently posted Sex.

  140. Okay, so “totes” reminded me of the time I worked at Starbucks and the guy I worked with said to me, “here come some custies” when some people walked in. Fuck. Seriously.

    Like

  141. If anyone wants another reason to have a crush on Mr Rickman, check out the totally under-rated movie Blow Dry.

    Like

  142. Oh my gosh, can we turn this into a poll? TEAM RICKMAN all the way!

    Like

    janice recently posted The Best Excuse for Procrastination.

  143. I might have missed it above, but I didn’t see anyone mention Rickman in “Something the Lord Made”, a true story about the doctor who pioneered a particular heart surgery for infants and his assistant who actually did all the work. Amazing acting as always.

    And I only use “totes” when I want to make my pre-teen cray cray. Because, as an original Valley Girl, I like totally know when I should like totally say TOTALLY. Like, oh my gawd, gag me, totally.

    And now my inner English freak can’t tell if totally is spelled correctly because I used it too many times.

    Like

  144. I thought Totes were an umbrella brand.

    Like

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  145. “If you wipe right, swipe right” is going to be my new Tinder motto

    Liked by 1 person

    tanktronic recently posted Hey Anti-Vax Parents : Why Aren’t You Smoking?.

  146. Alan Rickman’s birthday is tomorrow (Feb, 21) He is still with his very first girlfriend, after many years. I have never approved of “totes”. “Toots” has a place, all be it small. Used sparingly and at the right moment it can jazz up a paragraph like nothing else. I am alive and happy because I read your book.

    Like

  147. Death scene, when he was Sheriff in Robin Hood!!!

    Like

  148. Team Rickman all the way! And if I can pick a time frame too, I’d take Dogma. I think looks-wise he was at his prime those days. Younger Rickman looked a bit more arkward, and I didn’t like his Snape-looks at all.

    Like

  149. Team Rickman…but not in a I want to wear his skin kind of way. More like a keeping him confined in my house so I can hear his sexy voice way. My husband would have to deal with it. But he’s a Die Hard fan so I may just slide by.

    Like

  150. I’m very Team Rickman! He is the voice of god!

    Like

  151. Anyone else have the sudden urge to watch Dogma?

    Like

  152. YES! I love him in truly, Madly, Deeply. That movie is such a joy, and he plays the cello and smiles and he’s so dreamy and happy. I love it. Not as Snape, though, greasy git. (I like Snape as a character but as a man he’s the worst. I ship Snape/nobody ever haha).

    Like

  153. For the first time ever, I read every single comment, because it seemed so skewed I started keeping score. So far only 6 readers are not on Team Rickman, (one of which is due to sexual preference), 2 more are on Team Rickman’s Voice-only. It’s not a solid statistical sample, though, as all participants are self-selected as Bloggessians so there’s not really a control group. #TeamGiantFlamingNerd

    Also +1 for Rickman. Even the Hitchhiker’s Marvin one.

    Like

    Maya recently posted It’s Not Plagiarism If You Cite It, or What I’m Reading Now.

  154. Wait, there are people who have a crush on Alan Rickman? Have you seen Snape – not cute. Is this a crush on the character or the actor? If it’s a crush on the character which character? For instance I have a HUGGGGE crush on Legolas, but no crush on Orlando Bloom. Maybe this crush is shared by people of a “certain age”? (I’m 34)

    Like

  155. Whoever invented the word ‘totes’ and NOT meaning the umbrella or tote bags needs to be taken outside, stripped naked and made to shovel the snow from my driveway. I’d ‘totes’ enjoy that shit.
    And Alan Rickman is awesome. I don’t know which way you’re supposed to ‘swipe’ for him, but yeah, thumbs up for Rickman.

    Like

    terib19 recently posted Uncle Jesse? Is that you?.

  156. Seriously, Snape? He is so not hot, LOL, unless you are in to creepy guys.

    Like

  157. I remember watching “Die Hard” and thinking he was the sexiest bad guy, ever. #teamHansGruber88

    Like

  158. Totes agree with all of this.

    Like

  159. Bring on the hate mail – I don’t see it. Sure the voice, sure the acting, but I can’t picture me and Alan Rickman. Now, me and Sean Connery or Christopher Walken of 20 years ago – now you’re talking.

    Like

  160. jenny, when do you think your new book will be out? I am excitedly waiting lol
    I’ll help look for typos if you’d like help!! Hope to see it soon… Before that pesky AARP joins me up! Lol love your work, brings out loud laughs and chuckles all day.

    Like

  161. He is the only reason I watched Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (the horrible movie with Kevin Costner) more than once. His character was the best!

    “I’m gonna gut his heart out with a spoon…because it hurts, you twit!!” Awww, yeah!

    Like

  162. Alan Rickman. Obvi totes cute. Yes, that sentence deserves to be stabbed.

    In other news, I’m having a fantastic giveaway over on Trixie Bang Bang’s blog, it’s a totes cute item that will make ya’ll wanna swipe right. Check it out!! Nothing to entering except leaving a comment so I know who to pick to win. It’s a totes pay-it-forward give-away.
    http://www.tracyes.blogspot.com/2015/02/hydration-and-free-stuff.html

    Like

  163. Your last two posts, while indeed delightful, have pointed out just how old and out of touch I appear to be. Well done Bloggess, well done.

    Like

    Nancy Bestor recently posted Superstition Ain’t The Way.

  164. The swiping thing confuses me. I tried it with “Words with Friends” and ended up with ten other opponents I never wanted.

    Like

    Musings, Rants & Scribbles recently posted Downsizing Delirium.

  165. “Totes” makes me cray cray, which makes me need a vacay, all of which makes me need to Avadakedavra somebody NOW. And yes, go Team Rickman.

    Like

  166. I use the word “totes” around one particular friend because it irritates the ever loving snot out of him when I declare that his cat is “totes adorbs!” or some such nonsense. In my defense, he probably shouldn’t have let me know that it bothers him so much. How could I possibly resist?!

    Like

  167. I have been #TeamRickman for YEARS. Like way more years than I am willing to put down in writing. Let’s just say I’m one of the original members.

    Like

  168. I was going to post that music video but someone beat me to it! When I was a kid, my mom told me that the Sheriff of Nottingham was the sexiest character in Robin Hood: Men of Thieves, NOT Kevin Costner or Christian Slater. I didn’t get it then but OH MY GOD MOM YOU WERE RIGHT AND I WAS WRONG. Ever since Sense and Sensibility.

    Like

  169. Off topic, but wanted to let you know I bought two calendars at Zazzle and had problems with them so I ended up with 3 calendars and all my money refunded. I want you to get your share. Is there somewhere to send it or a charity you would like it donated to? On topic, #neutralonrickman

    (That’s weird. I ordered a calendar and mine was good. What was the problem, so I can make sure there isn’t an issue? PS. I’m a fan of any no-kill shelters and they’re always looking for donations. 🙂 ~ Jenny)

    Like

  170. I lurve me some Rickman. So smooth I want to spread him on my toast. (I did not say, I “totes” want to spread him on my toast).
    Anyway, nom, nom, nom.

    Like

    Marianne recently posted V Day PSA.

  171. I am team Rickman, Sense and Sensibility was the clincher. Also, I had a former coworker who spoke in all internet vernacular when not with customers….drove me crazy, or in her words, cray cray. Totes.

    Like

  172. TeamRickman all the way. If you haven’t seen his Tybalt in Romeo and Juliet – you are missing out.

    Like

  173. Alan Rickman is awesome, but not in a swipe right kind of way.

    He does an excellent Neil Gaiman impression in the Harry Potter films.

    Like

  174. I would totes swipe Alan Rickman. Do you think I’d get arrested for that?

    Also, that’s the first time I’ve ever used the supposed word “totes” in that manner. I feel dirty. For the “totes,” not stealing Alan Rickman.

    Like

  175. I have a tote bag that says “totes ma goats” on it, with a picture of some goats. Is this considered acceptable?

    Like

    Allison recently posted Christmas Recap.

  176. Yay for Rickman. Plus there’s this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eob7V_WtAVg

    Like

    beckyD recently posted Stupid Gifts People Give.

  177. I absolutely adore Alan Rickman.
    I have absolutely no clue who, what, or which way to swipe when it comes to Tinder (I do know about wiping right, though. I am not a complete heathen).
    And I absolutely loathe the word “totes.” So much so that if I had multiple tote bags, I would refer to them as “multiple tote bags” rather than “totes.” Out of an abundance of caution, you know.

    Like

  178. 182
    Karen in Michigan

    Quigley Down Under. And Robin Hood. Totes.

    Like

  179. When I hear the word “totes”, I totally wish I was an unicorn so I could stab people who use it. “Totes” – supposed to be cute but is not. Same concept applies to a stabby unicorn.

    Unless Rickman is riding said unicorn…

    Like

  180. I don’t know what any of this means, except I do like Alan Rickman!!

    Like

    Kathleen recently posted It's My Party.

  181. Alan Rickman. That man’s voice melts my sneakers. “Truly Madly Deeply” is one of my all-time favorite movies.

    Like

  182. okay, I have goats and sometimes, when no one is listening, I exclaim “totes mah goats!” at them. But only when no one is listening. I used to call them goatsies until someone told me what that was. So my endearment terms for goats are limited.

    Like

  183. Two words: Die. Hard.
    Or as my husband says…the greatest Christmas movie ever made.

    Like

  184. Had to google him at first but i’d swipe in twenty years maybe?

    Like

    lattes&layovers recently posted A Quick Review of 63% of This Years Oscar-Nominated Movies.

  185. Totally #TeamRickman. Since Sense and Sensibility…

    Like

  186. Team Alan Rickman in every way possible.

    Like

  187. Definitely team Rickman. Although he would have to be dressed as Snape and say ‘obviously’ in ‘that voice’ when I ask if he fancies a Shag.
    Too much?

    Like

    PinkNoam recently posted Board Games + Alcohol = Bloodsport.

  188. Truly Madly Deeply is my favorite Alan Rickman movie. Beautiful movie with a beautiful man.

    Like

  189. Snape is HOT. Also, tread carefully upon the whole “totes” thing. I wrote about it last year and hand to god received death threats. Seriously. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-ball/7-things-you-totes-need-to-stop-saying-if-youre-over-30_b_4375298.html

    Like

  190. Thanks for the “swipe right” explanation. I had seen references to swiping left or right but was never completely sure what it referred to. And obviously I was too lazy to google it. I learn so much by coming to your website. For real. Not being snarky or sarcastic. Every other post is like a PSA of some kind. Thanks Jenny.

    Like

    Gina W. recently posted People are odd and awesome.

  191. Reblogged this on quiet in the grasp and commented:
    *raises hand* Team Rickman!

    Like

  192. Okay. My Alan Rickman story is embarrassing and true. When he was in the above-mentioned Snowcake (which was wonderful), he stayed in a cabin in a tiny little town in a small town in Northern Ontario. I had occasion later to stay in the same cabin. There was a plaque there announcing that he had stayed there, and when I saw it, I LOST MY MIND. I lay down on all the beds, sat in all the chairs, looked out every window . . . you get the picture. I personally agree with other folks here and think a lot of the attraction is his voice, which is maturing beautifully. I have loved him in everything I’ve ever seen him in. and can’t believe nobody has mentioned “Blow Dry” – the coolest movie ever about how family is family no matter what. #TeamRickmanAllTheWay

    Like

  193. I meant “tiny little resort in a small town.” Just to emphasize how special it was to get THAT CABIN. I’m still not over it five years later.

    Like

  194. I adore Alan Rickman, but not in a sexual way, more in a zombie crush kind of way. (http://lawandmotherhood.com/2013/10/03/i-have-a-zombie-crush-on-elizabeth-warren/) So far the only mega-star I have had the sexy crush on is Hugh Jackman, as Wolverine. He has to be playing Wolverine though, there is something about his rippling arms and chest contrasted with that ridiculous hair style that makes my heart pound.

    Alan Rickman I would listen to for days, without eating or drinking, until I passed out on the floor at his feet and proved myself a true wierdo.

    Like

  195. 199
    brookeolsenuk

    LMFAOOOOOOO! this post is giving me life!

    Like

  196. Nothing to do with anything, but maybe you and Beyoncé will enjoy this video of a cock car.

    Like

  197. By Grabthar’s Hammer, you shall totes be avenged! #TeamRickman

    Like

  198. I don’t understand. Why would anyone have a crush on that guy, much less someone who says “totes”.

    Like

  199. More Knives, please. I would like to see more Knives. Preferably, in a pirate costume.

    Like

  200. Hell yes Team Rickman. And agreed with the commenter above about Dogma Rickman (though all Rickman is good Rickman.) Also I watched the video of Snape’s scenes in chronological order, and now I’m tearing up again. “Always.” sobs

    Like

  201. Your discovery of Tinder lingo helped inspire my latest post… I needed a nice introduction. Alan Rickman & Tinder did the job beautifully!

    Like

    balletandboxing recently posted Tinderific.

  202. I think using the word “totes” to describe multiple tote bags points to an even bigger problem altogether…

    Like

    averyhanaden recently posted He loves it when I call him “beautiful”….

  203. Totes mah goats!

    Like

    Donna recently posted Ghost in the Headphones.

  204. TEAM RICKMAN.

    I used to work for a clothing store when I was around 25 (maybe a bit younger) and we all would “name” our favourite folding board after a “hot” star. One girl wrote “Josh Hartnett” on hers, etc. I wrote Alan Rickman on mine. None of the younger girls I worked with knew who that was, so I started naming movies he’d been in. Round of blank stares. I grudgingly said “You know… Snape from Harry Potter” and got a huge “EWWWWW!” in return. Sigh.

    I can’t help it if I like old guys.
    See also: David Bowie

    Like

  205. totes had to google who Alan Rickman was😐 oops.

    Like

    amy - toothbrush travels recently posted What If.

  206. I’ve crushed on Rickman since Robin Hood and Die Hard. Die Hard was difficult for me because I also had a thing for Bruce Willis.

    Like

  207. FYI, a few months were missing out of the calendars. The replacements were perfect.

    Like

  208. “Do you not wipe unless you think you’re going to get lucky?” HAAAAAA! I don’t know about this “tinder”, I mean, I know what it is, however, I’ve never looked at it, because I don’t need it, nor am I curious to look. That being said, I wouldn’t have known what the whole “swiping right” would have meant. Now, to google this guy that people would swipe right for, hoping to see some beautiful looking man🙂

    Like

  209. What? Snape is not creepy. As a character, Snape becomes more & more tragic, romantic and heroic (which in my books equals attractive…but then, I like the dark lone wolf brooding damaged intelligent types) while Harry just gets more annoying and entitled, son of a horrid bully. I wish there was a twist where Snape is actually his real Dad…had to pretend to hate Harry to protect him. Rickman is awesome. However my heart-pumping vote goes to Antonio banderas circa desperado. Seriously, google it. But I digress…this vote doesn’t include banderas, so I’ll vote #TeamRickman

    Seems there are two kinds of people in the world, those who don’t like Rickman, and those who love the Bloggess.🙂

    Like

  210. I even hoped he’d win out over Bruce Willis in Die Hard and I have a heavy Bruce Willis Crush.

    Like

  211. I met my boyfriend on Tinder, which he was on ironically and I was on drunken-lonely-ing. We were each other’s only Tinder date. He’s meeting my family tomorrow and we’re still trying to come up with a lie about how we met. Something involve dinosaurs or cats or batman, probably. We’re open to suggestions.

    Like

  212. When the first Harry Potter movie came out my then-husband and I went to see it with my best friend and her then-boyfriend. When the movie was over all four of us agreed that we wanted to go to bed with Alan Rickman.

    Like

  213. Loved Alan Rickman after first seeing him in Truly Madly Deeply with Juliet Stevenson many years ago, great actor, lovely resonant voice and by all accounts a great human being must admit to shedding quite a few tears when I first heard the news RIP lovely man xxx

    Like

  214. Alan Rickman was the first man who helped me master the nuance between “hot” and “attractive”. Alain Rickman was SO attractive.

    I can’t quite wrap my head around him not being around anymore.

    Like

    balletandboxing recently posted First red flag.

  215. I have to get my hands on Blow Dry. I saw it in high school, and it is awesome. Completely underrated and wonderful.

    Like

  216. I saw him for the first time in a movie, I was with some loser boyfriend – well it was actually a professor who was 20 years older than me and who was being totally unethical by dating me, and we went to see that horrid Bruce Willis movie and then there was Alan Rickman in it – this was about 30 years ago. Alan Rickman appeared on the screen and all I could do was look at Alan Rickman. And listen to him. And wonder how on earth to find him again because this was Pre-Internet. I miss him already and what the fuck are people like Kanye West and Donald Trump doing around when Alan Rickman isn’t and what the FUCK is that about?

    Like

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