Sometimes I want to write something innocuous on Facebook like “Puppy kisses are awesome!” so hundreds of people will click the “like” button, but then go back in and edit that post to say something like “I just made a blanket out of skinned kittens”. And then I’d go into the comments and be like “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? WHY WOULD YOU LIKE THIS? This was a test and you failed. Stop skinning kittens.”
And then I’d write a new Facebook status saying that to clear my head I’d just made a bacon-wrapped mac & cheese burrito, and after getting a bunch of comments like “Sounds delish! Share the recipe!” and “Now I’m starving. I want one!” I’d go back and change that status to “Nothing smells better than a newborn baby”.
Then I’d probably have to stop using Facebook. That might be for the best anyway.
And now, the weekly wrap-up of awesomeness:
Shit I made in my shop (Named “EIGHT POUNDS OF UNCUT COCAINE” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):
- The perfect gift for friends and drunkards.
- As requested, a clipboard for the office. The first side will be hidden under your papers but you’ll know it’s there. The back can be flashed at people who are assholes and need to back off.
- For water. Or whatever.
- Kick-ass stuff I pinned.
- Victor always asks why there’s so much shit on the floor so I made him a video.
- My life story is on a bench on Prague. Life just got weird.
- This book. I cannot recommend it enough if you have a young daughter. Also good for old boys and small cats or whoever else.
Shit you should buy or steal because it’s awesome:
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