It’s just me, right?

Youtube sends me weird emails about videos they think I would like and when I looked at this one I thought…what the shit?  Is that even legal?

shark blow job

Then I realized I might be the only person in the world who automatically assumed this was a video of a shark blow job.  Both because I have weird personal issues, and also because sharks would give terrible blow jobs.  I would assume.

It’s just me, right?

85 replies. read them below or add one

  1. I wonder what that job pays? And how do you tell the hooker sharks from regular sharks?

    Like

    Shannon akaMonty recently posted Because #FakeUpworthyTitles Get More Traffic! Amazing! Unbelievable!.

  2. Nope. That’s exactly what I saw too. And sharks would definitely give a toothy blow job — doesn’t sound pleasant to me. Not judging though… if that’s what you’re into…

    Like

  3. Ouch!

    Like

  4. I thought it was a shark blow job too…

    Like

  5. Admittedly, I didn’t know which end of the shark the driver was holding at first… Still looked illegal as all get-out, though.
    I was listening to Brad Neely narrate one of the Harry Potter movies on YouTube yesterday. It then promptly recommended a bunch of videos of various people making fun of Bill O’Reilly (youtube why do you think that is a thing I would want ever?)

    Like

  6. Nope. I totally saw that too. And I would assume sharks would give uncomfortable, toothy blow jobs, but, you know, no judgement. If that’s what you’re into…

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  7. It’s not just you. :-\

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  8. That sounds like the sort of “experience” vacation gift you’d order for someone you really, really didn’t like.

    Like

  9. If it’s in international waters, there’d be no worries about legality, right?

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Agreed that a shark blowjob would likely be terrible because of the teeth issue. However a BJ from a geriatric Shark with no teeth might be okay. I’m not a marine biologist so I can’t say for sure…

    Like

  11. YouTube emails are often weird. I save screenshots when they amuse me. Here are two of my favorites:
    1. In one breath, “Don’t try this at home”, then in the next, “Put on your dancing shoes!” Make up your mind, YouTube: http://imgur.com/Yuwqx4d
    2. Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t how shark vision works: http://imgur.com/z40eatY

    Like

  12. shark can’t be all that great. she does not look happy or satisfied

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  13. Agreed that a shark blowjob would likely be terrible because of the teeth issue. However a BJ from a geriatric shark with no teeth might not be so bad. I’m not a marine biologist so I can’t say for sure…

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  14. I saw a shark blow job, too. My roommate says we have issues.

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  15. “Then I realized I might be the only person in the world who automatically assumed this was a video of a shark blow job.”
    Don’t ever change, Jenny.

    Like

    The Hook recently posted Pearls (?) of Wisdom From The Hook..

  16. Nope. Not just you. I would think a shark blow job would be uncomfortable and toothy; but hey, no judgement here. What goes on between two consenting vertebrates is none of my business…

    Like

  17. I thought it was a shark blowjob too… I wonder what that says about me.

    Like

    Adrasteia recently posted A couple treasures (at least to me).

  18. Totally not just you.🙂

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  19. You would really need to be careful of the teeth there. That could lead to a lot of unpleasantness all around.😉

    Like

    Brandee recently posted What is it about social media that brings out the worst in people?.

  20. Nope. I thought, ‘huh, that look like a shark giving a blowjob’ followed by ‘ridiculous, that guy obviously has a shark for a penis’

    Like

  21. Gives a whole new meaning to “Sharknado”.

    Like

  22. That was not exactly what I was thinking.. but now that you mention it…

    Like

    itzybellababy recently posted #BringBackOurGirls One year.

  23. That thought never entered mind when I looked at that picture….I burst out laughing when I read what you thought was going on….thank you I needed a laugh today.

    Like

  24. Impure thoughts, from the purest source. Omg I see it too.
    Sharks don’t have lips to pull over that snaggletooth. Don’t ever ask a shark to be the spokesperson for lip balm.

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  25. I love the way you think! You’ll be glad to know sharks swing both ways: http://dancingechoes.com/2015/04/18/swimming-with-sharks/

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  26. Nope!

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  27. Nope, not just you. Seeing the picture before reading your words I immediately thought it was a shark-on-human blowjob. Is it weird that I would totally watch a video containing that? For research purposes, obviously.

    How many shark fetishists do you think got the same email and are now disappointed?

    Don’t think about it too hard. Ew.

    Like

  28. 29
    plainsarajane

    Nope, totally not just you.

    I would assume getting a blow job from a shark would be quite similar to having sex with a lady with vagina dentata. But that’s just me.

    Like

  29. Nope, not just you. Seeing the picture before reading your words I immediately thought it was a shark-on-human blowjob. Is it weird that I would totally watch a video containing that? For research purposes, obviously.

    How many shark fetishists do you think got the same email and are now disappointed?

    Don’t think about it too hard. Ew.

    Like

    Sarah Elizabeth recently posted Adventures In Youtube (AKA, Being Crazy Is Hard).

  30. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0hm7pp_JFOs.

    This is all I could think of…

    Like

  31. 32
    Eddie Roosenmaallen

    That is exactly what I saw. So yeah, you’re probably crazy.❤

    Like

  32. I’m the crazy one because I immediately thought it was a manta ray blow job, and why would there be one single manta ray in what is clearly a school of sharks?

    Like

    Creeping Ivy recently posted I carried a watermelon..

  33. Your mind is in the gutter.
    You’re my kind of gal! x

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  34. I thought it was the other end of the shark (is that even possible? I’m not up on my shark anatomy), but same concept.
    Not just you!

    Like

  35. I wouldn’t have thought that normally, but when I saw it on Facebook under your name, that’s where my mind went automatically. Not sure whom that says more about . . .

    Like

  36. Well I definitely didn’t see it at first but now…

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  37. To paraphrase a Barney Stinson quote…

    “Nurse shark? I didn’t even SEE its boobs!”

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  38. It’s not just you…sharks DO give terrible blow jobs

    Like

  39. My first thought was, “What long tube is that guy thrusting his hip towards? Oh wait, that’s a shark.”

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    yangjanice recently posted Grandma Benefits.

  40. Nope. Not just you. My brain went right there too.

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  41. shark blow job is a disturbing thought.

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  42. Although, I guess shark’s need love too

    Like

    Michelle recently posted It’s….a……ROCKET SHIP!!!.

  43. You make me feel less alone.

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  44. No it’s not just you! I totally thought that was a shark blowjob. And had the same reaction. Is that even legal? Which, if you think about it is seriously f’ed up – a smarter first reaction might be that looks seriously unsafe….oh well.

    Like

  45. I don’t know what this is, but given it involves being surrounded by sharks, you couldn’t pay me enough . . . wait a minute, I work in the corporate world. Same difference:).

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    candidkay recently posted Vroom vroom.

  46. “Why be ordinary?”

    Well, off the top of my head, “ordinary” doesn’t get me shark teeth lodged in my genitals. Which I would normally think was a good thing. But I’m always behind on the latest trends, so for all I know having an un-mauled pubic area is considered too mainstream these days, and hot shark injections are where it’s at.

    Like

    Spoken Like A True Nut recently posted Dad vs. the microwave..

  47. Totally not you. My thoughts were:
    “Why is that Shark on that guy’s junk?! Oh..wait..wooooow! That’s….really..just….uhmmmm…a long way to go to have that done to you.”
    I’m glad I’m not just weird one here.
    E.

    Like

    quoylette recently posted Stoopid Hooman fears.

  48. 49
    Pretzelogic in Philly, PA

    Jenny dear, if the internet has taught us all anything by now, it’s that no matter HOW weird, it’s NEVER “just you”. Just sayin’. Love you.

    And, in conclusion, what do you call that act in the video? [handclap] The Aristocrats!

    Like

  49. You can only book a shark massage through the cruise line, but if you know the code work (scrod) and bring a good tip, you can get the full underwater experience.

    Like

  50. Considering how many nasty shark-and-girl-in-the-water tshirts I saw in Hawaii 20 years ago, I guess this is parity.

    Like

    Tragic Sandwich recently posted Anatomy of a Birthday Weekend.

  51. I thought the diver was putting his privates in the rear end of the shark…so it isn’t just you.
    Also, why would I mistake the front of a shark for the back? It would seem that type of knowledge could maybe come in handy someday.

    Like

  52. Maybe the shark is just trying to quit smoking…?

    Yeah, I got nothing.

    Like

    Sweeney J. recently posted The Sponsor Wears Prada.

  53. 54
    Mona Line Moisan

    OMG!! My mind was in the gutter too!

    Like

  54. 55
    SharonCville

    That sounds more like a form of torture than a job, though.

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  55. It’s not just you.

    Like

  56. It frightens me a little tiny bit that I received the exact same email from YouTube.

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  57. @Shannon aka Monty Why would you assume the shark was turning a trick? Perhaps this diver and shark share some type of deep, interspecies love?
    Jenn…it’s an honest mistake, I thought the same thing. I didn’t jump straight to assuming shark PROSTITIUTION though.

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    Marianne recently posted When it Rains.

  58. Sadly I was the recipient of a shark blow job once. Ok, she wasn’t really a shark but she used her teeth like one and that is all I have to say on the matter. Oy.

    Like

    TheJackB recently posted Who Are You Blogging For?.

  59. That was my first thought too… My second was some type of new circumcision method but I’d don’t see that ending well with all the other sharks around…

    Like

  60. I had to do a second take when I first looked at it – cause my first thought was “kinky bastard”

    Like

  61. Ok, now that I’ve seen it I can’t unsee it. But before that, yes it’s just you. And probably half of your commenters because most of us are fucked up.

    Like

    kmarrs recently posted The Walking the Borderline Weekender.

  62. I’m with Spoken Like A True Nut. I usually pride myself on not being ordinary, but if ordinary means NOT having my privates chomped off while attempting to get a blow job from a shark then I’ll make an exception in this case. In this instance, I’ll proudly remain ordinary so my sensitive bits stay attached and don’t become a shark snack.

    Side note: You couldn’t pay me enough to swim with sharks. Hey, let’s go under water and hang out with some predators who not only vastly outnumber you, but can move much faster than you can through water. Chances are they won’t eat you… we think… unless they are really hungry or something.

    No thanks. I’ll stay on the nice, dry land away from the man eating swimmers with tons of teeth.

    Like

    TechyDad recently posted Working Together To Beat The #Tabletop Pandemic.

  63. 64
    Doug in Oakland

    Profiles in extreme birth control / Darwin awards candidate?

    Like

  64. I should think a shark BJ would be the very last one a guy could ever receive, what with all the backward-angled teeth, so I sure hope they’re spectacular.

    Like

  65. What you need Jenny for Victor is a gummy shark😀

    Like

    Gary Lum recently posted My first Jack in the box meal.

  66. Bill Murray’s “Love Theme From Jaws” seems rather appropriate right here.

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  67. I saw it too. But maybe that’s just because I saw it on your blog, and my brain just assumes that your blog is the place to go for a shark blow job. Wait. That came our wrong (much like a shark blow job would, I assume)

    Like

  68. I didn’t immediately think of a blow-job (perhaps I’m getting old). My reaction was to clutch my testicles and scream.

    Like

    scriptorsenex recently posted Where am I? Who am I? What am I?.

  69. I saw that too but like Konen, I think it was because you pointed it out. I hope it was a good blow job, because it’s the last one that guy will ever get.

    Like

    Sheila Blanchette recently posted Last Days of Sunshine and Palm Trees.

  70. This makes my life.

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    NancyTex recently posted you’ve got some gall, buddy.

  71. You are not alone. Unfortunate “image grab.”

    Like

    Kathleen recently posted Speaking of Sayings.

  72. Absolutely my first thought, too.

    Like

  73. You are definitely not alone! But then, my mind usually goes dirty first …

    Like

    Erin aka Weekly Joy recently posted Happy making stuff.

  74. I’m not going to lie, this totally made my day… And let’s be honest, sharks giving blow jobs would be like getting ice cream with no actual ice cream lol.

    Like

  75. Um. That was the first thing I thought about when I seen it. I was like WHATTTT! But yea, I would think they would.

    Like

    emaylerocks recently posted Oh my gosh! It is Tennessee!.

  76. “Num, num, num” says the shark.

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  77. I wonder how many wives there are out there that wish a shark would give their husbands a toothy blowjob! Quite a lot I imagine.

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  78. You know, some guys are really into weird shit like that.

    Like

    Karen Marie Peterson recently posted Karen's Summer Movie Preview (Hint: 2015 is Gonna Rock!).

  79. It’s definitely not just you. That was my first thought.

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  80. Nope. Apparently it’s a lot of people.

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  81. Thank you for making me feel less weird. Or at least not alone. I totally saw a shark giving a diver a blow job. So wrong in so many ways.

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  82. Um….I went close but no cigar…
    I have several friends who are veterinarians & animal research scientists. One had an unfortunate incident where a stallion collapsed as she was extracting semen for artificial insemination.
    And I thought someone was attempting to do the same with a shark… until I realized which way the shark was pointing.
    Hm.

    Like

  83. I think it’s because the title has “job” in it…… subconscious association when you actually see the picture…. plus it totally looks like the diver is cradling the shark there LOL

    Like

  84. In Minnesota it’s illegal to pleasure yourself with a live fish. Presumably dead ones are fine though.

    Like

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