It’s sort of a happy birthday to all of us.

I just found out that you can design your own leggings, so of course I was like, “You know what these pants need?  A motherfucking happy raccoon.”

AND GUESS WHAT?  I WAS TOTALLY RIGHT AND THEY ARE GLORIOUS.

“HELLO FROM PANTS.” ~ Rory

The hand placement is unfortunate. Or perfect. Depends on how you feel about being high-fived on the butt by an over excited raccoon.

The best part is that not only is an insane raccoon staring down people on the subway, but also his fur makes it look like you have luxuriously long leg hair with glitter stuck in it.  Like a werewolf who just came from a party.   The only thing better to put on leggings would be a really unflattering picture of your ex on them and then walked around their neighborhood like a mobile billboard they can’t untag themselves in.

Just a suggestion.

PS. Today is Victor’s birthday.  Happy birthday, sweetie.  I love you.  For your birthday I am not buying these tights.  For you, I mean.  I might buy some for me.  BECAUSE LOOK AT THEM, VICTOR.

PPS.  They’re in my shop (along with this pair as well) if you want a pair yourself because today all their clothes are 40% off.  If you’re not reading this when the sale is on, just wait until it is again because $60 for leggings seems insane.  Almost as insane as wearing a raccoon on your butt.

114 replies. read them below or add one

  1. This is delightful, Jenny, And what a wonderful gift for the birthday boy.

    Like

    Kelly and Geoff recently posted Today in Civil War History -A Defiant Refusal to Give Up.

  2. I never knew I needed a pair of leggings like this until this very second. If the house deal goes through and I have money to play with again soon, these will be mine!!

    Happy Birthday Victor!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 3
    Laney in Chas SC

    I think I say this every year but Victor and I share a birthday – Yay for September babies. Though it is the most frequent birthday of the year so maybe we are not so unique after all. (Hint: 9 months from New Years)

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I love you.

    Like

  5. Happy birthday, Victor! And love the crazy leggings!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Furriously leggings, it is. Love them.

    Like

  7. These might be the first leggings I ever own. Nothing says ‘total boss’ more than these.

    Happy birthday, Victor!

    Like

    the incurable dreamer recently posted new york state of mind.

  8. 8
    Trent F. Milam

    Happy Birthday, Victor! Will you model the leggings for us?
    trentalsowrites.com

    Liked by 2 people

  9. So fun to wake up and have those burned into my retinas for the day! Love!

    Liked by 2 people

  10. If I weren’t a bloke – for whom leggings are inappropriate – I would be on Google images right now picking my style.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Who wouldn’t want a Racoon High-5ing their ass?! It’s like a little 🖐 *smack, Atta-Girl everytime you wear them! 🦊

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Good lord, Rory’s mouth makes it look like she has a gaping wound in the side of her thigh! Just in time for Halloween?

    Like

  13. So could we make legging with JUST the raccoon legs and then a matching T with the upper body? Raccoon cosplay baby!!!! 😉

    Oh yeah, and Happy Birthday Victor. 🎂🎂🎂

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Happy birthday Victor!

    Like

  15. OMG! Love the leggings! Happy birthday, Victor!

    Like

    Lisa Orchard recently posted Why We Write.

  16. I was on the fence about them until I saw the hand placement. It brings it all together! His expression is saying “hey look where my hand is guys!”

    Like

  17. These are absolutely the best, and just in time for the fall fashion trends. How great would these be with a pair of UGGs?!

    Happy Birthday, Victor!

    Like

    Terra Walker recently posted Thursday Afternoon Bartlett Bacon Salad.

  18. Jenny, this week I found your book (audio) and blog…BEST WEEK EVER! I do not think I have smiled/laughed so much in a long time. Starting on your first book (reading in reverse) today. Thanks for this and making me realize I am “normal”, you are amazing.
    Happy birthday Victor, I hope you don’t get taxidermy as a gift.
    PS – any grammatical errors are due to my cat sticking her butt in my face while typing!

    Like

  19. I love love love them both! Love the Happy Raccoon grabbing my butt! Love the cartwheeling happy raccoons! Love the long leg hair glitter look! Don’t love $60 but hey everything has a ying and yang right! These are amazing. I may have to make some with my pitbull Frankie on them!

    Like

    thompsonhouseblog recently posted A Desire to Know What I Truly Want.

  20. I full on cackled! Those are amazing and I love you so much!

    Like

  21. Holy Hell, according to the photo you’ve got to have a thigh gap to pull those off! Aw well, they are still awesome. Happy Birthday to Victor!

    Like

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  22. New dimension to the phrase “bite me.”

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Happy Birthday Victor!

    Like

  24. Happy Birthday, Victor! May the Force be with you.

    Like

  25. Happy Birthday Victor – may the raccoons be with you.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. What would be even better is wearing these with a long top or dress. Then it will look like a raccoon is reaching up your dress and that makes him insanely happy.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Oh. My. Sweet. Jeebus. These leggings are everything! I need to lose enough weight so I can wear them without making Rory look like he’s having an allergic reaction to shellfish. This might just be the weight loss inspiration I needed.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Groped by Rory AND Victor’s birthday, AND it’s a Friday? Wow! Too much awesome for one brain to handle!

    Liked by 1 person

    becomingcliche recently posted Notes From the Zookeeper: Help!.

  29. Happy birthday Victor! Today you get to be right! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  30. I want, but sad to say I can’t…………cry

    Liked by 1 person

  31. Isn’t that just like a women? Remove all the raccoon hair from her legs just to wear a picture of raccoon hair on her legs…
    https://damngirlgetyourshittogether.com/

    Liked by 1 person

  32. i was trying to just hide my great disappointment at the fact that BIG girls cannot order these ~ and then i read onemorefool’s reply. **** i love you both ****

    Like

  33. Well, I had no idea until now what costume I should wear for Halloween. Now I know I most likely need to be a werewolf who just came from a party! I’m thinking werewolf mask, tuxedo, and LOTS of confetti & glitter!

    Happy Birthday, Victor! For what it’s worth, I think the leggings would be lovely on you!

    Love to you both (and Hailey, of course!)

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Happy Birthday Victor!! Thanks for being the best thing ever for Jenny and Hailey. You are a saint and we love you so much!!!

    For anyone interested I created a Bloggess Tribe Map where you can add a pin and put your social media stuffs so we can connect better geographically.
    Map link: https://www.zeemaps.com/map?group=2714072#
    You can check out this tweet for instructions on adding a pin: https://twitter.com/HallieS86/status/913769853202452481

    Liked by 1 person

  35. Oh my goodness. I MUST HAVE THEM.
    Happy birthday, Victor!!

    Like

    Awkwardly Alive recently posted What even is “A Scissor” anyway?.

  36. OMG. these are so freaking hilarious. Epic, even. I may have to get a pair and scare the bejeezus out of everyone I come in contact with. And having a tiny (TINY…BWAHAHAHAAHAH) raccoon tagging my behind…icing on the cake!!! Love love love! Thank you for making me laugh my ass off this morning!!

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Happy birthday to Victor!

    He really wants towels for his birthday.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. OMG! too funny, you need them Jenny and we need to see them on you..I’m sure victor would love them..

    Liked by 1 person

    The Hellion recently posted What’s That Smell??.

  39. Can you get them with multiple faces, like those adult onesies? (This one is supposedly Nicholas Cage, though I don’t think it looks all that much like him). Happy birthday to Victor, and all hail Rory!

    Liked by 1 person

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  40. Is that a raccoon on your pants, or are you just ‘Furiously Happy’ to see me?

    Liked by 4 people

    Kat recently posted Like the Brady Bunch Only Not Really.

  41. WooHoo, Raccoon butts !!!

    Like

  42. Happy Birthday Victor!!! Wishing you a Furiously Delightful day!

    Jenny, those leggings are the bomb!!! Or should be bombed…one of the two!

    Hi Hailey!

    Liked by 1 person

    LadyPamelaRose recently posted She’s Alive…Aliiiivvvveeee!!!.

  43. Me and Victor have the same B-Day!!!!

    Like

  44. When I first read the title, I read ” it’s VIBRATORS birthday, and we’re celebrating by … Then I was like “say what? What is she celebrating?” Lol! It was so funny! They are great leggings though!

    Like

  45. These are so wonderfully cool!

    Like

  46. I tend to wear skirts with my leggings, so leggings where the raccoon is on my calf would look better. Alas, I don’t think I have any raccoon fabric to make a raccoon skirt. Today I’m wearing a skirt with squirrel, mice, and acorns. Happy birthday to Victor.

    Like

  47. Those are both terrifying and amazing. Terramazing.

    Like

    The Cupcake Witch recently posted Life Update: School and other things (maybe? hopefully).

  48. Or perhaps amazifying. Which I think I like better. Amazifying.

    Like

    The Cupcake Witch recently posted Life Update: School and other things (maybe? hopefully).

  49. You should get them in miniature and put them on the real Rory, and then get leggings made with that design. Then you would be wearing leggings with a taxidermied raccoon wearing leggings featuring himself as a taxidermied raccoon–like looking into a funhouse mirror. Also, Happy Birthday to Victor!

    Like

    mydangblog recently posted My Week 157: Monkey Butlers; Rottweiners and Other Bad-Ass Animal Hybrids.

  50. Can you design all the clothes, please? They might not be flattering, but they sure would be fun.

    Liked by 1 person

  51. They make fabric markers. Has anyone tried coloring the clothing from You Are Here with them?
    Also, Happy Birthday to my fellow Libra, Victor. (My birthday was the 25th, so for once I have to be Team Victor.)

    Like

  52. It’s my guy’s birthday today as well! Happy Birthday Victor!

    Like

  53. Happy Birthday, Victor! Now you get to picture ALL the women wearing these! LOL! First time I’ve ever wished I could get away with leggings-I would own these in a heartbeat! Love!

    Like

  54. Happy Birthday Victor! “At least it’s not towels” ..:)

    Like

  55. 55
    Ariel Rose McGovern

    Oh man! Today’s my daughter’s birthday! Wish I could get her these. Hurricane Irma has us a little strapped. I love how the little paw reaches behind! LOL

    Like

  56. If I had legs that looked like that…. I’d be naked!!

    Like

  57. Happy birthday Victor!!

    Like

  58. Jenny, I’d love to have these…(with a last name of COON I should), but the employment gods are against me and my cats insist on eating. Someday!

    Like

  59. Oh my God. I love you. That is all.

    Like

  60. 😂😂😂😂😂 Best. Leggings. Ever. And I find the hand placement hilarious. Will be getting. But not today, so I’ll have to wait till they go on sale again.

    Like

  61. Happy birthday to the long-suffering Victor!

    Like

  62. Happy birfday, Victor! You’re a god damned saint and we love you, too!
    Those leggings are FIRE.

    Like

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  63. Hilarious! Happy Birthday, Victor!

    Like

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  64. This is the best thing ever. Period. Unless of course you find a company that makes a unitard version of this…

    Liked by 1 person

  65. 65
    Doug in Oakland

    Happy birthday, Victor.

    Like

  66. Damn! Desire causes suffering and they are not in my size! Double suffering!

    Like

  67. I love that you keep creating ways for us to easily identify each other in public.

    I mean, those of us who go out in public, that is.

    Anyone wearing a Rory or Beyoncé item is a friend of mine!

    Liked by 1 person

    OwnLessDoMore.us recently posted Work camping for Amazon: What’s a minimalist like you doing in a place like this?.

  68. These are beautiful.

    Like

  69. Love the pants, and I think Rory’s hand placement is perfect!

    Like

  70. OK I”m not really a leggings person but I kinda want these. LOL

    Like

  71. I have never wanted anything more.

    Like

    messyworthiness recently posted That Time I Went To A Hanson Concert.

  72. Today is my daughter’s birthday, too. I should buy her some raccoon pants. She’s an “adult” today, and as such deserves raccoon pants.

    Like

  73. Oh dear, Tim Gunn would not approve. I, on the other hand, adore them.

    Happy Birthday, Victor!

    Like

  74. Sigh. I love you. 😀

    Like


  75. i found a beaver you need to see!
    (taxidermy not body part)

    Like

  76. Happy birthday, Victor.
    I just corrected that from “Happy birthday, Victim.” Maybe si, maybe no.

    Like

  77. These leggings are amazing!! Happy Birthday to Victor!! 🙂

    Like

  78. Happy birthday, Victor, I hope you, Jenny and Hailey have a great day.

    Like

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  79. OMG! I’ve just spent the past 45 minutes playing with different artwork including old album covers to see what other designs I could make with this legging template. In particular I did the King Crimson album cover of “in the court of the crimson king”… disturbingly cool. Then I tried the Calvin & Hobbes “starry night” artwork… I could spend hours and hours playing with this template… but nothing as awesome as Rory of course!

    Like

  80. Jenny, you read my mind!!!

    Well, technically, I want to make a Cow Cow skirt with lots of Rory’s encircling the bottom of the skirt, side by side with their hands almost touching. So he could greet people in every direction. (Not the “bottom” bottom of the skirt. Like along the edge of your skirt that would be near your knees. Get your head out of the gutter, Jenny.)
    I’ve been meaning to ask if there is a PNG of Rory out there that I could do this with. Or would that be uncool, since Rory is yours? Don’t mean to cross any boundaries. I’ve just been feeling like I could use more Rory-style reminders that I’m okay when I forget that I’m okay.

    Happy birthday, Victor!!! ❤ ❤ ❤

    Like

  81. Personally, I think Victor would look absolutely stunning with a glittery raccoon high-fiving his butt.

    Like

    noteworthynonsenseblog recently posted Kitty Photoshoot!.

  82. You say it’s Victor’s birthday? Well it’s my birthday too! Happy birthday, Victor!

    Like

  83. I’m totally cool with a racoon high-fiving my butt, but I’m a tad concerned about how close his eye seems to be to the crotch area. Does he really want to look at that forever? Poor Rory. Happy birthday Victor!

    Like

  84. I’m gonna be the most stylin at the gym with these bad boys!

    Like

  85. Our husbands have the same birthday! I like it. (But mine is named Mike, not to be confused) HBD to them!

    Like

  86. Ordered! These are the MOST AWESOME leggings ever!!!!!!!

    Like

  87. Those are AMAZING! I would totally get a pair if I didn’t have to pay for them. yay Rory!

    Like

  88. I heard the part where, father and daughter, you have a PAIR of Libras in your home. And I wonder no more at the Zen state of happiness and creativity you three enjoy.
    Happy Birthday to Victor!

    Like

  89. craftandhobbies.blog

    Like

  90. I hope Victor had a happy birthday – today 9/30 is mine. Life is good!

    Like

  91. These make perfect sense for a day at my new job. Also happy birthday to Saint Victor.

    Like

    jennifercoss recently posted Fucking Introduction.

  92. Happy birthday Victor!

    In other news: I will be sleeping with the lights on tonight.

    Like

  93. I found this a day late but my birthday is also the 29th so happy belated birthday to Victor and me. Also love these leggings so much!

    Like

  94. They look great! in a related topic, is there any chance you would make a pill case with the raccoon on it? Thanks!

    Like

  95. With the leggings and the get tough or die shirt I would be the weirdest and most badass person at my gym

    Like

  96. 96
    Barbara Browning

    And here is a little present.

    Sent from my Windows Phone ________________________________

    Like

  97. 97
    lisasrainbow

    I am so sad I missed the sale but will be watching for it to come around again! These are glorious! Happy Birthday Victor! Thanks for the awesome present!

    Like

  98. Oh, no…..You Did Not!! I’ll never be able to unsee this…

    Like

  99. Those pants are DELIGHTFUL.

    Like

  100. As awesome as those leggings are (HECK YEAH!), I’ll stick to buttery soft leggings from $12.50/pair from HicksInspired.com. Hopefully you can understand my cheapness 😉

    Like

  101. I looked these leggings up. Each pair are individually printed, cut and made to order at a Canadian company called Art of Where. Their website states everything is made in-house and they pay their staff a real wage. The reviews say they’re well-made and don’t get see-through.
    As an artist who has longed to get into printed wear without the human cruelty of fast fashion, this company thrills me.

    Like

  102. Use one of your coloring book drawings for a design!

    Like

  103. OMG – as soon as these are on sale again, BOOM SHAKA LAKA!

    Like

  104. You need to make these leggings for us plus-sized people. I would so walk around with a raccoon or more on my ass!

    Like

  105. Happy belated birthday to Victor! And some outrageous koala cuteness vid on this special week!
    http://thebestfbvideo.com/thank-you-for-such-tenderness-in-this-wild-world-by-symbio-wildlife-park/

    Like

  106. I needed to see these after seeing Las Vegas shooting and Tom Petty dying. I need to smile.

    Like

  107. Thank you for a well needed smiling moment. These leggings are a great memorable birthday gift for anyone/everyone!

    Like

    Nomads By Nature recently posted In A Vase On Monday: Chaos Captured.

  108. I have started to blog! This was my inspiration! (not this post, but this blog!) i have only written two posts and they might be very shitty but gotta start somewhere.

    I can remember the part in the book where Jenny talks about working in HR and then becoming a writer…. kinda stuck with me.

    comment completely unrelated to the post.
    😐 😐 😐

    Like

  109. Happy birthday Victor, I share a birthday with you!

    Like

  110. Random question… has anyone purchased a T-shirt from Zazzle? I’m trying to decide between the Women’s Bella+Canvas Relaxed Fit Jersey T-Shirt, Women’s Bella+Canvas Favorite Jersey T-Shirt, and the Women’s Basic T-Shirt.

    I find that unisex styles can be too loose and shapeless but some “women’s” styles often go overboard and are way too tight because they assume you have breasts and hips but a tiny waist and flat stomach.

    I want to get a “Feeling Stabby” or “Be Nice Or I Will Stab You” shirt. Because it’s just been one of those weeks.

    Like

  111. I cannot believe this service exists and I knew nothing about it! So. Many. Crazy. Legging. Ideas. Thanks, Jenny!

    Like

  112. Happy raccoon tights! Why have I never thought of these? You are a modern-day genius! ❤

    Like

    Jessie Lee recently posted Aging rapidly = Asian-style beef bowl for dins.

  113. I love these! I may have to bookmark this page so I remember to keep checking back for prices. Because I love them, but I also live in China, so they’d be close to $100 with shipping. Yikes!

    Like

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