BOGO

Yesterday I bought a melon but the clerk told me to go get another one because they were having “a BOGO sale” and I was confused but he explained that “BOGO” is short for “Buy One, Get One” and I said that that’s not really a “sale” since every time you buy a melon you get a melon because that’s how shopping works.  And then the clerk was like, “No, it’s buy one, get one free” and then I was like, “Well wouldn’t that be BOGOF?” and he agreed but said that he likes “BOGO” because it’s fun to say and I agree except “BOGOF” is also fun to say and if you yell it at customers as they pass through it sort of sounds like you’re telling them to fuck off but in sort of a Britishy way and that would very attention-getting and probably therapeutic.  He stared at me like I was crazy but I wasn’t the one incorrectly selling melons so I think we’re probably square.

 

118 replies. read them below or add one

  1. we do not deserve you

    Liked by 8 people

  2. 2
    VERONICA CAINE

    Ah, hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I totally needed this today!

    Like

  3. 3
    35jupiterdrive

    pretty sure I’d like saying BOGOF

    Liked by 1 person

  4. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

    Like

  5. We think we used to light BOGOF candles when we were camping to keep mosquitoes away. Didn’t work.

    Liked by 2 people

    Brian recently posted Sticks. Stones..

  6. 6
    35jupiterdrive

    kinda for this, tbh

    Like

  7. I want to go shopping with you

    Like

  8. I totally agree with you. And though I’ve never said it out loud, BOGOF would be WAY more satisfying.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Now I’m just looking for ways to insert BOGOF into daily use.

    Like

  10. What if you only WANTED one melon? I mean, I’m confused here. But I do like the cadence of BOGOF, I have to agree.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. But then what do you call if if it’s “buy one get one 50% off”?

    Liked by 1 person

  12. We seem to have a series of the _o_o abbreviations. FOMO, YOLO, BOGO. I guess they dropped the F to fit in.

    Liked by 3 people

    theycallmetater recently posted Please Read Before You Comment.

  13. 13
    Crystal C Guengerich

    My wife and I joke that we got our twins BOGO at the IVF clinic! LOLZ

    Liked by 3 people

  14. In Ireland we say BOGOF. =) I can’t get on board with BOGO at all. What happens if something’s ‘buy one get one half off’? Too confusing!

    Liked by 2 people

  15. Young Me made an argument for BOGAF (buy one get ANOTHER free) and tried to convince my mother—whom I believed had some authority over the issue—to make that important change. I was told I needed to discuss it with my math teacher, for reasons that made no sense to me at the time. Looking back, I recall that she sort of hated him for sending home work with instructions to “ask a parent for help” at the top… which I think we can all agree is a dick move, so yeah, he should have got the BOGAF conversation.

    I’ve lost track of my point, but I’ll bet if you think about it there’s someone at your daughter’s school who needs to hear about BOGOF.

    Liked by 5 people

    actualconversationswithmyhusband recently posted My Unexamined Life.

  16. BLESS you! I’ve been making this argument for I don’t know how long. (Not a super long time, I just failed to keep track.)

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Nice melons. Just sayin’.

    Liked by 4 people

    becomingcliche recently posted The Introverted Activist: Be the Light.

  18. Also, BOGO is also sometimes used for buy one, get one half-off. In which case he could holler “BOGOHO!” at people, which should also be fun.
    xo

    Liked by 6 people

  19. Ta-ta, cheerio, and while you’re at it BOGOF

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Right??? Plus, what if I don’t WANT a second whatever thingy is “BOGOF”…can I just get the one I got for half the price? THAT would be a sale. But, nooooo. Also, I think today I will just randomly yell “BOGOF” at people, as therapy. If I end up in jail, you’ll bail me out, right??? 😉

    Like

    Rowan recently posted Saggy Boobs and Anxiety Bombs – This Is My Life Now.

  21. This is why so many of us love you.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. 24
    Sandra Hampson

    Yeah, bogg off is totally something I used to say to my brother when mum was listening (instead of what I WANTED to say 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  23. 25
    michelleconnor17

    And you know that cashier was probably barely 16 and thinking quietly to themselves “WTF?” until they really thought about it and realized that you were right. It may have changed their life forever. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  24. I once totally freaked out a store clerk because I refused to take the additional free item -because I neither wanted nor had any use for more than the other be. Then there are the paint store clerks who cannot understand buying 2 quarts for basically the same price as a gallon, because I don’t want an extra half gallon to store or throw away.

    Like

  25. BOGOF. Insect repellant.

    Like

  26. 28
    Stephanie Elizabeth Gayle

    We absolutely say BOGOF in my family.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Let’s see how fast I get fired yelling bogof at people. I’ve already been pretending my name is bill for no reason what so ever. Every time a customer asks me how I got the name Bill I come up with a different answer. My fav is its short for Billionaire my mom wanted to give me life goals :0)

    Liked by 1 person

  28. As soon as I said BOGOF in my mind my first thought was “ I could never say that and not change it to Fuck Off or Bug Off or some combination of the two. Since I say Fuck Off regularly I suppose it wouldn’t really matter except I do tend to watch my language at the grocery store. My closest store is the Geriateic Publix so there is no need to give anyone a heart attack or cause someone to stop short in an aisle and cause someone else to fall and break a hip.

    Liked by 2 people

  29. But did you get the second melon??

    Like

  30. Ha! I learned something. I thought it was the name of a hip clothing store chain.

    Like

    susielindau recently posted Take A Photo Tour Through Hidcote Manor Garden.

  31. You have a gift of making the most random stuff HILARIOUS! Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  32. I’m British and we actually do use BOGOF for but one get one free. And no, the similarity to bog off is not lost on us either.

    Liked by 3 people

  33. Although BOGO is not really borken, I like BOGOF better, so, yes, BOGO could use some fixen . . .

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Thank you, Jenny, for totally making me laugh today!

    Like

  35. Damn! Someone beat me to the “nice melons” comment.

    Perhaps I’m just a crotchety old broad (damn kids — get off my lawn!), but I’ve never really gone for the abbreviations — BOGO, FROYO, YOLO, J-LO, LAUREL/YANNI…

    Liked by 2 people

  36. My phone likes to autocorrect BOGO to BOBO. So that’s an option as well, apparently.

    Liked by 2 people

    Liz recently posted DETROIT GIVEAWAY: 25 admit-2 passes for Alpha, 8/14 at Emagine Royal Oak.

  37. your blog posts are always suck a stunning stream on consciousness but this might take the cake!
    x0x0 Caro http://thecarolove.com/

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Do clerks ever look at you when you walk into stores and you can hear them thinking…”Oh, yeah, it’s her again.” lol Keep up the free association thinking!

    Liked by 2 people

  39. You make the grocery store fun. Come shopping with me.

    Liked by 1 person

    Sheila Lester recently posted Ground Floor & Candelabras.

  40. Where I grew up in Yorkshire, England, “Bog off” was a common playground insult. A step up from the elementary “Buzz off!” and prior to being bold enough to use the F word!
    Bog is also slang for toilet. I still chuckle when I see BOGOF on grocery store signs here in Canada!

    Liked by 2 people

  41. But melons are round. Not square.

    Liked by 1 person

  42. A second melon sounds like anxiety waiting to happen. Who has the time to worry about eating two full melons in the nic of time? He isn’t doing you any favors; you’re definitely square.

    Liked by 1 person

  43. Well played. Bogof for the win!

    Liked by 1 person

  44. Hahaha, you are absolutely right about BOGO!

    Liked by 1 person

  45. I never encountered BOGO until I moved to Massachusetts. Seems like everything up here is BOGO. They also have a variant that’s BOGO 50% off. So it’s like buy one get half of one.

    Like

  46. I think I’ve heard people from England say this to each other. You can always tell the context by the reactions.

    Liked by 1 person

    Mona Andrei (aka Moxie-Dude) recently posted My superpower is an uncanny ability to embarrass myself in public.

  47. Even worse if when it’s “Buy One, Get One Half Price” which would be BOGOHP, and that sounds like the name of some weird-ass fairy tale giant: “Then Bogoph noticed that Jack was stealing his melons and he chased him down the melonstalk while the goose that laid the golden cantaloupe looked on and hissed like the stupid cobra chicken that it was!”

    Liked by 3 people

    mydangblog recently posted My Week 201: Me and Jeffrey, My Author Interview.

  48. “Then Bogohp noticed…” jeez, it was my joke–you think I could at least spell the damned giant’s name correctly.

    Like

  49. BOGOF! Buy One Get Another F#ck! Yep, for any prostititititititues — what? some people pay for tities! — who are looking for a way to broaden their clientele base or what have you, and this acronym speaks for itself! 🙃

    Liked by 1 person

  50. That second one is going to go bad before I get ’round to eating it so it really should be BOFFAGOTWA (buy one for food and get one to waste away) but that wouldn’t fit on a sign so I’m a much bigger fan of 50% OFF!

    Liked by 1 person

  51. I agree with your wholeheartedly. (great now you will probably go off on “wholeheartedly” too! sigh)
    I totally agree with the other commenter about “I don’t want or need two, so just give me this one for half price!” BOGOF Cashier!

    Liked by 1 person

  52. BAAAHAAAHAAAA!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  53. In Israel they call it a 1+1 sale. Took me a while to figure out what that meant.

    Liked by 1 person

  54. In Israel they call it a 1+1 sale. Took me a while to figure out what that meant.

    Liked by 1 person

  55. 58
    Briona Allen

    I love this story,lol. You are a Gem to this world.

    Liked by 1 person

  56. You’re right, Jenny, of course. It should be BOGOF. The store owner isn’t being logical.

    Liked by 1 person

    Gaz recently posted Yummy Lummy Curry lamb neck and quinoa recipe.

  57. 60
    Ana Yardley

    You are spectacular.

    Liked by 1 person

  58. BOGOFF, you skunk duckling.😘😀

    Liked by 1 person

  59. I always say BOHOF and it should be BOGOHO when it’s but one get one half off. Stores are liars when they say it’s BOGO and it’s really BOGOHO.

    Liked by 2 people

  60. This might be my new favorite thing to yell

    Liked by 1 person

  61. Bwahahahahaha, so so good

    Like

  62. melons are round. cake are square…..

    Liked by 1 person

  63. You are so correct, Jenny!

    Like

  64. I agree and it clearly defines the “Get One”. Like “Get One” WHAT?
    Love your humor and your posts. Thank you. Keep healing, bringing us joy and keep those store clerks in check”
    😎🦖🍚

    Like

  65. I’m guessing the clerk was a millenial. Because young people are totally willing to have a conversation like this.

    Like

  66. OK but DID YOU GO AND GET THE SECOND MELON!?

    Liked by 1 person

  67. BOGOF it shall be ! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  68. 71
    Jennifer A.

    I’m sure you leave so many people you deal with in public, scratching their heads. Or at the very least, make it into their casual dinner talk. I like to do that to people in public. I can say something sarcastic or weird with no expression on my face and they don’t know how to take that. LOL Most of the time people think I’m serious. Thank you for being you Jenny!

    Liked by 1 person

  69. I agree…BOGOF is way more fun to say than BOGO.

    I kind of needed this today..transitioning back to real life from vacation is HARD and the last two days it’s been squishing me into the ground like somebody just threw a really heavy weighted blanket on me. I was able to drag myself out of bed long enough to do a few things I HAD to do (pick up books I had on hold at the library, buy Vaseline for my nasty ass dry feet and some lip balm that smells like a Coke) and I’m going to make every effort to get all the shit done I NEED to get done tomorrow.

    Liked by 1 person

    mommatrek recently posted It’s like a heavy blanket squashing me.

  70. Another Brit confirming we use bog off! at least as often as shops use BOGOF.

    Liked by 1 person

  71. Bogof sounds kind of like Bug off, so score one for Jenny!

    Liked by 1 person

  72. I think the correct term is B1G1F which is pronounced big-if, but is not nearly as fun to say as BOGOF which I will now be using exclusively, so thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  73. I used to work retail. Totally hated BOGO. BOGOF is much better. I also have had clerks who can’t deal with me only wanting ONE item that is BOGOF. I did actually get the manager to give me 50% off instead. But just the once.

    Like

  74. 77
    Seniorgreymom

    Now I just want to wander around shouting bogof at random people

    Liked by 1 person

  75. I always think that when I see BOGO. I mean, how many would I expect to get when I buy one? Of course, I’m also someone who hates signs that say “Raised Manholes”, because I can’t figure out how a hole can be “raised”.

    Like

  76. Yep, BOGOF is a thing here. ❤ from the UK.

    Liked by 1 person

  77. What actualconversations… said

    Bobby

    Liked by 1 person

  78. Thanks for giving that clerk an important lesson! He was obviously in need.

    Like

  79. With the Midwestern accent it would probably sound too much like we’re telling our customers to bug off. We can’t do that on the sales floor! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  80. We actually do call it BOGOF in England – I seem to recall there was a TV ad a few years back where they used it as an opportunity to say “bog off” a LOT!

    Liked by 1 person

  81. The same happened to me, however the person at the register was not as “bright”.
    Her: Sir. it’s by one get one.
    Me: No shit.
    -Sir, it’s by one get one.
    Me: Uhu.
    -Sir, you have to get the other one.
    Me: The other what?
    -The other bottle.
    Me: What other bottle?
    -Today is buy one get one on all alcoholic beverages.
    Me: So what, on the rest of the days people pay and just leave empty handed?
    -What? No, sir..
    Me: I’m fucking with you. But do you get why what you’re saying doesn’t make sense?
    -What do you mean, sir?
    Me: Yeah.. I don’t have time for this. Have a wonderful day.
    -Sir, do you not want your bottle anymore?
    Me: Fuck no.

    Like

  82. I’ve always said this, and always got the same reaction you did!! Thank you!!!!!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  83. BOGON. BOGOF. BOGON BOGOFF, BOGOFFER! [clap clap]

    Liked by 2 people

  84. Am I the only one doing my best Beavis and Butthead voice saying, “You said melons!”???

    Liked by 1 person

    Kat recently posted Get Off My Lawn.

  85. Thank you! I’m not a big fan of acronyms in general and this one drives me crazy (well, crazier). I will now join your chorus of BOGOF!

    Liked by 1 person

  86. 90
    Margot Williams

    You will not be surprised to learn that we brits call it BOGOF. We also tell each other to bog off when aggravated.

    Liked by 1 person

  87. A recent encounter with this melon situation in my neighborhood grocery store left me wanting to scream BOGOF!!! I did not want TWO melons , I wanted ONE melon because I’m the only one in the household who eats them therefore the second melon would have been inedible before I would have consumed all of the first huge one t My request was to simply discount the existing melon that I did want to buy 50% rather than giving me one that would go to waste. Yes I could have gifted the OF to some melonless person but my pain meds were wearing off so I ended up leaving without a melon thinking to myself “go BOGOF!!!’ “

    Liked by 1 person

  88. BOGO is what happens with normal shopping items – Buy One, Get One.
    I buy a thing, I get a thing.

    BOGOF is the special offer – Buy One, Get One Free
    I get two things for the price of one thing.

    Thanks for the story 🙂

    Like

  89. square is a word I never would have used to describe you.

    Liked by 1 person

  90. 94
    Michele Erickson

    Bwaahahaha!!

    Exactly!!

    Liked by 1 person

  91. Ahhh…. classic Jenny 😋😊😃

    Like

  92. You could have probably gotten one melon for half price. Some stores will do that when they have BOGO(F). And just for the record, it took me forever to figure out that AYCE was code for “all you can eat.” I thought it was some new style of baby back ribs. Go figure. TMA (Too many acronyms).

    Liked by 1 person

  93. 97
    Joseph Passarelli

    I alway feel ripped off at a BOGO sale. And why the hell would I want 2 melons? Why not give me 50% off my 1st melon? Are the melons getting old and they want to dump them on us? Just because I am a cheap old bachelor who only occasionally like melons doesn’t mean you can make me buy two. That make them even more of a cheap bastard then I am. BOGO/BOGOF KEEP YOUR DAMNED MELONS . How about a BOGGOGF on rdt. Buy one gallon Get one gallon free of Red Table Wine… Just sayin…

    Liked by 1 person

  94. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YES!!

    Like

  95. 99
    Carol Anne Fusco

    That clerk probably doesn’t know how lucky he was to have you in his check out line.
    Also, thanks for the “be careful out there” post the other day. Thanks to you I paid extra attention to what I was doing all day and, in this astrologically challenging time that could only be a good thing. Love you.

    Liked by 1 person

  96. 100
    Jenny Kubeck

    I’ve always hated it when stores advertise a BOGO, but they mean “Buy One, Get One Half Off.” Isn’t that a BOGO HO?

    Liked by 1 person

  97. So did you get another one?

    Like

  98. 102
    AinOakPark

    My daughter is married to a Brit and I thought this was really funny!

    As for Jenny Kubeck’s comment (#100), a BOGO HO is a HO who works a slow night like Tuesday, because she needs the money. Or it might just be someone who likes sales. You never know.

    Like

  99. I hate BOGO anything.
    If I buy one, and get one free, I am paying “Half off” of two.
    But, what if I don’t WANT two?
    Just sell me one for half off.
    /endrant
    I agree with Post One, from Anonymous.
    We do not deserve you. ❤

    Like

  100. 104
    Rebecca Stromgren

    Well, that didn’t happen correctly.
    Post 103 should have had my ID on it. :/

    Like

  101. Yassss, instead of “Bugger off” it can be “BOGOF! Toss your salad!”

    Like

    ReallyLoriRose recently posted Dildos I have known, or, rotate your mattress more than once every couple of years..

  102. God, I just love you for this, Jenny!

    Like

  103. Am British. Regularly say bog off in both senses.

    Like

  104. My $0.02 on the matter has been that the acronym should be BOGT — buy one/get two.
    But not as fun as BOGOFF.

    Like

  105. British here. Can also confirm BOGOF is the accepted expected phrase. Said in both contexts on a daily basis by me. Example sentence;
    ‘Oi! Bog Off! Those are my BOGOF melons, go get your own and put them in your own shopping trolley.’

    Like

    The Lockwood Echo recently posted Do Not Feed The Fish.

  106. I too, had to have BOGO explained. From now on, BOGOF IT IS.

    Like

  107. 111
    Hellie Sara

    Us Britishy people really do call it BOGOF (pronounced “Bog Off”). It’s a thing here. And they say the Brits are polite!

    Like

  108. We need to go shopping together 😂😂😂

    Like

  109. 113
    Crazy Jane

    ‘Bog Off’ really is a polite British way of telling someone to F*** Off, we use it all the time.

    Like

  110. 114
    Anonymous

    I’m going to start yelling BOGOF to people when they piss me off. Nicely done!

    Like

  111. 115
    Anonymous

    I once did twenty minutes with a McDonalds drive through attendant who couldn’t grasp that I only wanted one apple pie when they were two for a dollar.
    “I’d like one pie”
    “They’re two for a dollar.”
    “yes, i’d like one.”
    “They’re two for a dollar”
    It was long enough ago (like more than a week)that I don’t remember how it ended except that I have this story so it was totally worth either a fifty cents or several hundred extra calories.

    Like

  112. BOGOF it is now from now on. I like the sound of it.

    Like

    Vicky recently posted Help me stop being stupid!.

  113. Bogof is funny. I’m British and it does have a twang of Englishness about it.I have never used the phrase, yet it wouldn’t sound peculiar coming from a posh twit saying to his chum ‘Oh, Bénédicte just bogof !

    Like

  114. So he won’t let you go with just one melon? What’s the end of the story?

    Like

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