Worse yet, if someone else is playing couch commando I will yell and stomp my feet until they change the setting.

Saskia’s last blog post..Heaven is a thin little chocolate covered minty refreshing cookie. Hell is knowing the box isn’t for you.

Hope you find some meds that help with the pain.

Lisa Milton’s last blog post..fibs I tell myself

laurie’s last blog post..Here Is Where I Offer Updates and Corrections

and if I need to remember a name or something I repeatedly go through the whole alphabet until I figure that name out

Wireless Dog Fence’s last blog post..Shop Around For Your Wireless Dog Fence

Why? Because just over two weeks ago, my 5-pound cat tried to kill me. She decided to have a nap on my top step, and I tripped over her while I was getting set to do laundry. And while no wooden dowels were harmed, I did break my knee and required surgery to set the break. Spent a week in the hospital. Not permitted to weight-bear for at least six weeks. And me with a new baby at home, too.

And I just can’t help but think that if I would have found your blog a month earlier, the whole tragedy could have been avoided, since I would have been warned in advance of the potential dangers of the common housecat.

I’ll make a point of reading regularly now, to ensure I take no more such chances.

As to neuroses – well, I have far too many of those to list off, and I’m sure most have been covered by your previous commenters. I’m pretty sure my future compulsion to check your blog regularly in order to ensure I don’t injure myself in a bizarre cat-related incident will qualify!

Trish’s last blog post..Your true colours

I have a lot of the same as other commenters, such as garbage disposals (and blenders…seriously, I know that once they’re running, I will be compelled to stick my hand into the blades), spiders (all those legs are just wrong. And each leg has like 4 knees…what’s up with that?), and dividing my M & M’s into color groups, eating the odd ones first so there’s the same amount of all the colors, and eating them in 3′s (not in 2′s–even numbers are wrong).

I also have a few that weren’t mentioned by anyone else.

First: I can’t have people behind me. We only go to restaurants at odd hours because I have to have a corner seat, I absolutely won’t go to movie theaters because people can walk in the aisle behind me (in the dark, no less!), and having to go to the grocery store or the bank gets me stressed to the point of tears because I’ll have to be in line and someone else may get in line behind me (sometimes I shop at a 24-hour store at 4 o’clock in the morning). Drive-throughs aren’t great, but they’re not as bad because I know there’s a buffer zone, plus I have a mirror so I can keep an eye on the person behind me and I’ll know exactly how close they are at all times.

Second: I’m creeped out by people. Not just strangers, but everyone. I’m not sure what I think they’re going to do to me, I just get all nervous out in public which is really unfortunate because I’m a Sunday School teacher for K-6th (yes, I’m afraid of the kids). Church is agony (why do we have to shake hands? What’s the point?) and working outside of the home is out of the question. At every job I ever had,I’ve been convinced that co-workers don’t like me and talk about me when I’m not there, planning out ways to make me stay home (which is funny–I’m completly non-descript and do my best to stay unnoticed). And I freak out if someone rings the doorbell and there’s no one but me at home to answer the door. I start acting like I’m in some kind of spy movie or something, pressing myself up against walls and trying to peek out the windows in a way they can’t see me. If it’s someone I don’t know I won’t answer. For UPS or something like that I answer, but I make a big deal about holding my dog back like she’s vicious (but really she’s more likely to pee on his shoes than to bite him).

Third: The phone. I dislike people calling me, but I’m really uncomfortable making phone calls (even to my own family). Once I got a call from a lady at church who was soliciting for people to “go to jail” for MDA and make phone calls to raise money. I was too scared to say “no”, so I spent the next month unable to sleep because I was sooo worried about making the phone calls. Finally, a few days before the lock-up I emailed the lady in charge and told her I had a schedule conflict and couldn’t do it (that sounds so shabby).

Fourth: I “channel” my pets. I know what they want to say, so I say it for them (sometimes they cuss in front of the kids and have to be reprimanded, but I go easy on them, cuz they’re just animals and not very bright). My husband and kids think I’m trying to be funny, but what if my dog really does have something to say and I don’t say it for her? She’ll never be heard, and I just can’t do that to her.

Fifth: I’m convinced that my posessions have conscience thoughts. I hate giving or throwing things away because, what if it’s part of a family or a couple? And I hate re-arranging things. If I move a chair from my bedroom to the Living Room, won’t it feel like a kid starting a new school in the middle of the school year? And magazines with a picture of a person on it….I always feel like they can really see me and are judging me, so I have to scribble over their eyes with a pen or tear that part of the picture out.

Wow, I think I’ve gone beyond OCD and into Batshitcrazyland.

ScrappyQuilter’s last blog post..Grandpa’s Quilt

Anyhow, on to the neurosis because whenever I read your blog I feel a little bit better about myself. Now doesn’t that just warm your heart?

OMG, I can’t believe how many freakin comments I had to scroll through to get to post. I wonder if you ever can read them all and how. Why am I even posting if I don’t think you’ll read it, is that neurotic?

Is it neurotic that sometimes I post things in other people’s comments that I don’t have the balls to post on my own blog?

Anyhow, way back up in the earlier comments, someone named Jessica posted about not being able to use the outside of the toilette paper because of germs—me too! She also said she has to tell people she loves them before sleeping — me too! How can different people have the same neurosis? I have to tell people I love them all the time because of 9/11. Life is too short and I’m terrified of someone dying knowing that the last conversation I had with them was missing me telling them I loved them. I’m always afraid my husband or son will die in their sleep and I’m terrified of waking up next to a dead body. I think about death all the time and I think I need therapy for it but I’m afraid they will put me on some drug that will kill me so I just suffer in silence.

I always have to cover my mouth when I yawn because when I was in the 4th grade I read a book about superstitions and it said that you should cover your mouth when you yawn because it’s polite and because the devil or evil spirits could enter your body while yawning. I can’t understand why in the hell out of all the supersitions I’ve read, that one stuck.

Does the huge amount of comments on this post alone suggest that your audience is really messed up (myself included)? I guess there is a place for us all, afterall.

TheMacMommy’s last blog post..I got a sticker

I came here, realized I’ve already been here and somehow lost your link when I intended to save it because I fucking LOVE this post–especially the Johnny Depp muppet–and now I’m here and can I just say will you marry me?

I like to finish things (like bottles of shampoo) so much that once I get near the bottom I start using 10 times as much as I need.

Steph’s last blog post..I give up…