I was on CNN today for some reason to talk about politics and parenting (which is sort of weird since I’m more of a bizarre humorist at best) but I still managed to mention the zombie apocalypse, the possible robot revolution, and the threat of the internet becoming self-aware.
Here’s the clip:
PS. If you’re new here and want to leave angry comments about me you can, but keep in mind that you’re choosing to fight with a woman who has no real political convictions and has a full zombie apocalypse platform, so basically you’re wasting both of our time and should probably go focus on yelling about something less ridiculous than me.
PPS. Thank you, CNN. I appreciate your good humor. And your not suing me.
This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by my newfangled friends at CoffeeTable, a (free!) iPad app that wants to be your bff and take you shopping—from the comfort of your very own couch / loveseat / pouf. Oh you want your favorite catalogs and exclusive sales and to buy your goodies in just two taps and a magical unicorn? It’s all here (maybe except the unicorn). YOU’RE WELCOME.
Remember last month when my blog kept crashing whenever I got too much traffic? Well, turns out I needed a new dedicated server and all that junk, and I sort of vacillated on getting one because it’s more expensive. But then I got an email from a company who offered to sponsor my new server this year just because they’re awesome and are tired of my blog being down. They even asked that I not mention who they were, which is either because they’re just amazingly selfless or because they’re embarrassed to be associated with me. Possibly both, if they’re as smart as I suspect. Regardless, I adore them and they decided that not only would they help make the blog remain viewable to you all, but they also made you a present.
Just click on the widget on my sidebar and it’ll let you print it out for free. Give it to your kid. Freak out the guy in the next cubicle. Decorate your office. Plus, they’re making more bloggess-style puppetry, so every week you can see what they’ve come up with next.
PS. Is this the most professional, least profanity-laden post I’ve ever written? Shit yeah it is.
Really, internet? That is both terrifically insulting and also just plain wrong.
You spell my name with two G’s.
Updated: It occurs to me that many of you are new and might not understand why people would even be searching for that. No worries. There’s a simple, rational answer to all of this, really. It’s because I used to be on meth. The good kind.
UPDATED X 2: I just noticed that this month there’s been a fairly significant decrease in people googling “douche bag” and then being pointed to my blog.
The Well-Read Wife: Twisted and Awkward. In a good way. Sometimes she's a sad panda. Also, there are book reviews.
The Sunday Bottles: Drinking our way to the bottom of things. (Wine,
improvised cooking, and Sunday night family dinner. What could possibly go wrong?)
Mama Bird Diaries: Completely overwhelmed by four kids. And the gold minivan is just embarrassing.
Artisan socks: Awesome socks for Mother's Day. Disgusting contest through May 15th!
Blogmosis: The guy who said "What if I do the opposite of what gym-freak protein shakers do?", ate real food, sat on his butt for a month and lost 20 lbs. Yes, seriously. You're welcome.