Marketing gone bad – Page 2

Someone get them a dictionary.

I just got a form-letter blog pitch from a PR agency congratulating me on my “bludgeoning career“. I’m going to assume they meant “burgeoning”. I’m also going to assume they sent this form letter out to hundreds of other bloggers. Which is kind of hysterical. Burgeoning: To begin to grow or blossom; to flourish. Bludgeoning: ToContinue reading “Someone get them a dictionary.”

Sometimes I suspect people are fucking with me on purpose

It’s hard not to be a little bit offended by the hundreds of pitches I get offering me diet pills and lipo coupons, but I just ignore them and add them to my list of people to kick in the groin if I ever meet them in real life. The pitches are often insulting, butContinue reading “Sometimes I suspect people are fucking with me on purpose”

If my t-shirt got your baby stolen then I apologize (on behalf of the t-shirt).

Ok, so last week I made this shirt for cats to wear. I made it for cats who don’t want to wear your damn shirts. But they didn’t have any cat models at my online store so instead I used a baby but then I photo-shopped my cats face on it for my blog because IContinue reading “If my t-shirt got your baby stolen then I apologize (on behalf of the t-shirt).”

I’d laugh but I can’t stop crying.

This post sounds like I must be exaggerating for effect but I’m not. This was an actual pitch, y’all… Pitch: We’ll pay you $500 for a total of 175 active text links at the bottom of 35 of your most popular blog posts. me: Okay. That’ll cost $43,750. Pitch: We will pay you $400. PleaseContinue reading “I’d laugh but I can’t stop crying.”

Mother’s Day marketing gone horribly wrong.

My sister (Lisa) just emailed me a screenshot of the Poison mug I made on Zazzle. Lisa: “Aww. Nothing says ‘Sentimental gifts for mom‘ like a great big mug full of poison.”

I kind of feel bad now

Emails I just sent to a PR person who is probably very nice and who I will certainly regret being snarky to tomorrow once I’ve had sleep and once Victor is home from the hospital (He’s fine, btw. He just had a metal plate and a bunch of screws put in his arm. A metalContinue reading “I kind of feel bad now”