It’s the weekend which means it’s time for my weekly wrap-up but before I do that I just want to point out this bit of awesomeness. It’s an article written by ReadWriteWeb about a Facebook/AOL partnership. Hundreds of people found this article when they googled “facebook login” and somehow assumed that this article must be a new version of facebook and then logged in to ReadWriteWeb to leave angry comments about how they could not figure out how the new facebook worked (because they weren’t actually on facebook at all and were still on ReadWriteWeb) and these angry comments kept coming in until ReadWriteWeb finally put up a giant bold statement which basically said “Dear Google visitors: THIS ISN’T FACEBOOK, Y’ALL. You can find facebook at facebook.com. Look, we’ll even give you a link to it. Just leave, okay?” but of course that didn’t help at all and so the “I HATE this new facebook. Where is my wall? Mom, where are you?!” comments kept flowing in and then it got worse because everyone else noticed that the stupid people were confused which was quite hysterical until the other stupid people realized what was going on and started leaving violently angry and poorly-spelled comments insulting the first group of stupid people for being so stupid. Then ReadWriteWeb wrote a whole new post entitled “We’re still not Facebook” but of course that didn’t help at all. It was quite awesome and reminded me a lot of the Dr Pepper debacle. Regardless, I thought I should point out that when you get an angry troll commenting on something you do it’s probably from one of these people. The stupid people who don’t understand facebook. Or possibly the stupid people violently yelling at the other stupid people for being so stupid. Either way it’s a pretty good lesson in why it’s important to not be bothered by the stupid angry people because those people are here to (unwittingly) entertain us. This is all in the Bible, I think. Also, my favorite comment of the whole ReadWriteWeb post: This thread reminds me of the time my grandfather typed his phone number into the microwave’s keypad, then wondered why his kitchen was on fire. (Seriously, that happened.) ~ Warren Benedetto
Fried gold. Now on to the wrap-up…
This week on my sex column (which is satirical and relatively safe for work if your boss isn’t a cocknuckle):
This week on the internets:
- I’m doing an open interview at SexIs. Best questions win inappropriate things.
- I wrote you a love letter. It’s very mushy. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
This week on Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle:
This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:
This week’s wrap-up sponsored by the selfless teams at Mamavation & EarthFootwear who sold their hair to buy you a watch chain.
Comment of the day: It’s a shame about your sponsors, since I just this week sold my watch to buy them tortoise-shell hair combs. ~ MommyTime
Who taught stupid people to use the Internet? It’s like giving a monkey a loaded gun. But not as funny.
I passed out reading that, woke up, came back, finished, then laughed.
I dont get it. Every time I try to fax something, it gives me 8 billion copies. And they’re all like I didn’t get it. And I’m like how could you not, it gave me 8 billion
God, I love stupid people. Angry stupid people are even better.
My comment has nothing to do with anything, other than, when I saw this photo, I thought of you: http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/2010/02/09/the-baby-grinder/
Is that wrong? Probably. I mean, I don’t think you grind babies or anything. Though, I guess you could. I don’t want to tell you your business. Anyway, small children plus awkwardly placed meat grinders made me think of you. Happy President’s Day.
.-= HannahBanana´s last blog ..My cats are gay! =-.
@Fuegita: LMAO! A girl at my office confuses the printer and fax all the time. The first week I worked there, she was standing by the printer glaring at it, and then opening the little doors trying to figure out where the fax came out.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
I know that it’s not Valentine’s Day yet, but you have roses in your hair, and I’m drunk, so it’s very much like Valentine’s Day, plus I am spending hte extra time to pretend I’m not drunk by typing really slowl and making sure to captitalize the V and D and Valentine’s Day, which means htat this is all special and shitl. For reals.
I’v devolving as this comment goes on. crap.
V D. Heh.
I love.you.
Don’t tell the pALINIODE, MY HUBSAND, ABOUT THAT COMMENT.
Caps lock makes that erxta funne.
I’l stop now.
.-= schmutzie´s last blog ..It Ain’t Easy Being Downy =-.
Oh man, that is *amazing*.
And I’m not the least bit surprised. I work customer service. Nothing really surprises me anymore. *sighs*
.-= Chloe´s last blog ..Deal Of The Day (20% Off At J Crew!) =-.
Stupid people – put on Earth specifically to keep me happy. Thankyou evolution.
.-= Veronica´s last blog ..Even Her =-.
People who’ve never learned to think are awesome, but it’s especially awesome when they have rudimentary typing skills and a wi-fi connection. It’s like sitting in a crowded restaurant and all of a sudden an elephant comes in and sits at the booth next to you. That’s entertainment that can’t be bought, really. I know, because I tried, and that nice guy who took down all my credit card numbers and said he’d send me an elephant from Nigeria plus deposit the balance of his orphan dad preacher’s savings fund into my bank account never followed through. I guess my credit rating wasn’t good enough or something.
.-= ajnabi´s last blog ..Striker, or, Strike-Out (SPOILER HEAVY) =-.
Horrible spellers are the reason why I live.
Every time a person gets inappropriately angry an angel shits on said person’s house.
.-= SnoWhite37´s last blog ..I Could Write About….No. Or Perhaps About….No. Or… =-.
People are more sensitive about facebook than pretty much anything else in the world. That’s why facebook went to hell when they started allowing people outside a college network. I think I’m going to head over to that site and tell the angry people this same thing.
.-= Amanda´s last blog ..Kidney Stones are my worst enemy and other ER stories =-.
I just want you to know I tried to log into your website and couldn’t. I pay good money to read this, you can’t keep me out forever! AHAHAHAHA! This is a dating website, jes?
.-= Heather Kephart´s last blog ..The Muse has a Sick Sense of Humor =-.
It is a shame about your sponsors, since I just this week sold my watch to buy them tortoise shell hair combs.
.-= MommyTime´s last blog ..Oh, wonderful stainless steel dishwasher with the cavernous size, flexible rack design, extra rows of cup holders, and powerful cleaning! =-.
I love you MommyTime. Literacy for the win.
That’s just scary. One would think the differences between the two sites would be quite apparent. On the other hand, it makes it quite clear how some phishing scams work.
.-= Stephanie´s last blog ..Build a Domino Course – Free Fun Fridays =-.
Have you considered using this as a form of revenge? Having all your users go to some site that pissed you off and leaving stupid comments? I think I’ll go have a Dr. Pepper now.
.-= mousebert´s last blog ..Omlet Art =-.
Oh don’t ever discourage stupid people from their stupidity. There are whole levels of stupidity that range from normal to pathological (which are always the best). I wrote on my blog about my affair with my ‘porcelain lover’ and ‘pine fresh beau’ , during a bad medication = exploding body episode. I had someone write me to tell me to not look outside my marriage for solutions. Thankfully some people are just plain stupid. The world would be a boring place otherwise.
.-= Michelle Roger´s last blog ..How To Spot A Sick Chicken. =-.
The absolute best thing about the “10 Things…” sexis post is that, on #5, the thing that Amazon thinks people would like best with a sex toy/acupuncture/Pinhead egg thing is New Moon party decorations. “I think I will eat some cake off Taylor Lautner’s face and then…do whatever it is you do with this thing.”
.-= Traci´s last blog ..The following is a list of People born the same year as me: =-.
Stupid people make the world go round!
.-= Real Dads Hangout´s last blog ..Real Dad’s Apology =-.
So I don’t get those angry dumb people. I get weird comments by some kind of spam bot. I think I might like comments like that, over a robot. As Ferris B said: Don’t worry about it, I don’t even have a piece of shit. I have to envy yours.
.-= tara´s last blog ..It’s like Shakespeare, Only Drunker =-.
Happy Valentine’s Day, Schmutzie! I love you, man.
.-= juliejulie´s last blog ..The One About Swimming =-.
Stupid is totally the new black. It JUST isn’t the good looking one’s that are stupid now, nope. Now it seems stupid is a growing epidemic. Kind of like obesity or diabetes. Of course you cant get on a tread mill for stupid…
*shrugs* If only though…
.-= Crystal´s last blog ..Text Messages….can often be taken out of context. =-.
I love stupid people. Way more fun to assault them
Also-that captcha thing is fucking possesed. And google is SO not helping.
.-= singlemomma_cc´s last blog ..Who’s to blame for my blogging? =-.
Thank you so much for turning me on to the Don’t Even Reply website. I’m crying from laughing so hard! Happy V-day Jenny! You’re beautiful!
So this is lame but it’s kind of funny. Just substitute ‘funny’ with ‘really retarded.’
I sent that disguised weapons thing to a friend and went off on a rant about my day, and she was just like “man, I miss you and your crazy antics.”
And I was like “I am a bundle of joy! …actually, that’s just what I look like. I’M ACTUALLY A CONCEALED, FRESHLY-SHARPENED BUTTERFLY KNIFE. Ducttaped to this bundle of joy.”
Soooo THAT’S how the link had me and my friend envisioning knives taped to babies. Congratulations, cuz we’re totally blaming you.
I actually could not go through the wrap up becaue I read the word stupid so many times that I am now stupid on top of being vapid.Thank you.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..V-D Love and I Don’t Mean Venereal Disease Love Because I Don’t Know Anyone Who Loves Venereal Diseases, Except When They Happen To Horrible People =-.
FUCK…BECAUSE
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..V-D Love and I Don’t Mean Venereal Disease Love Because I Don’t Know Anyone Who Loves Venereal Diseases, Except When They Happen To Horrible People =-.
I hate spelling.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..V-D Love and I Don’t Mean Venereal Disease Love Because I Don’t Know Anyone Who Loves Venereal Diseases, Except When They Happen To Horrible People =-.
Your blog just yelled at me. Sad Face.
.-= A Vapid Blonde´s last blog ..V-D Love and I Don’t Mean Venereal Disease Love Because I Don’t Know Anyone Who Loves Venereal Diseases, Except When They Happen To Horrible People =-.
So many stupid people, so little money for ammo.
Two words:
“Awe”
“Some”
Stoopid people is stoopid
How can people be that dumb and still be alive? Seriously? How do they manage to keep the bleach and orange juice separate? Christ on a crumpet, they all need taking outside and putting out of their misery.
It’s crazy that the SEO of RWW is so good that people are seeing that site instead of the normal Facebook. Although if you do a search for Facebook login, Facebook is #1 and RWW is #4. I wonder if that is a case study in what people will click on. Maybe #1 isn’t so important. 🙂
See, comment threads like that are hilarious until I realize what they really indicate about the world around me, and then I just want to be held while I cry.
The inappropriate Valentine’s Day cards are very funny!
.-= Lynn from For Love or Funny´s last blog ..Weekend Wish =-.
Bear Grylls needs to stop sending me those retro Michael Jordan Valentine’s cards. Bear, I don’t give a fuck if you think “Our Love is a Slam Dunk” or if “My Kisses Are Nothin’ But Net” – what does that even mean? And that last one, “Your Ass is an Easy Basket!”- I can tell you scratched out the original message – but come on, that’s not even nice. Fuck you in the eye, Bear Grylls.
.-= furiousball´s last blog ..First draft of Abbeness.com… =-.
Will I be like those types of people someday? Am I going to reach an age when the flying car controls baffle me to the point that I can’t even get liftoff? Will I inadvertently kill my cat in the teleporter because I failed to put in the right numerical combination, and then make an irate visual call to blame the teleporter company, even though it’s not bringing my inside-out cat back to life?
I’m frightened of the future.
.-= Theresa Milstein´s last blog ..Questions and Answers =-.
I especially liked that somebody used the golden prickly pear as a replacement for their dead hedgehog…
.-= Jennifer June´s last blog ..It’s Business Time… =-.
Did you know its easier to get a kidney than a kitten in the fine state of New Jersey? Have you ever tried to cuddle with a kidney?
.-= Elly Lou´s last blog ..Three Posts for the Price of One =-.
So that’s where the trolls are when they aren’t spewing in my comments! Thanks for the heads up – and another deliciously funny post!
.-= Jane´s last blog ..To Are Or Not To Are – THAT Is The Question =-.
This reminds me of the time my student showed up at my office and asked me where my office was while I was sitting IN MY OFFICE. Ummm, here?! I think!? HELP! TO BE OR NOT TO BE!
Thank you for this deliciously hilarious story.
I had a hard time getting past your picture with all the flowers and junk to read the rest of the post. Anyway, that’s probably the coolest thing that anyone has ever had happen. I wish I had not-invented the new not-Facebook. Now I’m sad on Valentine’s Day.
.-= Kendahl´s last blog ..Cinnamon Bears and Other Randomocities =-.
Just noticed ReadWriteWeb has a new slogan:
“ReadWriteWeb: There’s nothing Facebook about it.”
.-= moooooog35´s last blog ..Wrapping up the Week like a Diseased Wiggly – Feb 14 =-.
I always assumed everyone online was a smarter person than I was, who knew how to code php and do cool things like that. It’s sad to realize that people are as stupid in the virtual world as in the real world.
Democracy is awesome. All people have a voice. The only flaw is the people.
And sometimes the politician.
And occasionally the process.
.-= Ninja´s last blog ..The hours =-.
Your blowdryer spits out roses on V day too? I thought mine only did that for me.
.-= Kelly Duffy´s last blog ..Amore Or Maybe It’s More Like Agape =-.
Thanks for the beauty tip about “How to dress up hair curlers”…I kept wondering what to put in those roomy centers. I tried my keys, cell phone, hot dogs, wads of cash, my hamster…but my picture kept ending up on the “People of Walmart.com” site. Roses…so much better. Fashion do Glamor girls! No black rectangle across my eyes this week! Whoot! Thank you Jenny, for the best Valentine’s Day ever! Now, where did you get the rose shooting blow dryer, Target?
.-= LookieLou´s last blog ..Pet Blogger Support Rocks! =-.
I would just like to let you know that your “Inappropriate anger” blog title ended a 17-year friendship of mine when one my friends, who has a terrible habit of jumping to inane, unfounded conclusions, took my amused retweeting of said title as a personal attack. So thanks for weeding the selfish twat out of my friend circle. You did me a favor, I think.
Whose boss isn’t a cocknuckle? Or a twat-tard of some sort?
Even when I was a boss, I found myself being all kinds of cocknucklish. It just happens as soon as you get a little bit of power. Delicious, intoxicating, cocknucklizing power.
.-= Ells´s last blog ..Face plant =-.
Somewhere, probably in Nigeria, a bunch of phisers are rubbing their hands together all sinister and shit and writing down every one of those morons’ names. Email scams in 1….2…..
.-= Dani´s last blog ..Dear B: You Need to Learn to Be a Better Wingman =-.
Saw your VD (that’s for Valentine’s Day, not you know…. venereal disease, though I expect some women get that for the holiday also) Video. Great!!! You are so soft spoken (and beautiful I might add) in real life!
.-= MiddleAgedWomanBlogging´s last blog ..While I’m Getting Ready For The Travel Channel To Find Me…. =-.
Nothing funnier than stupid angry people. Except maybe, stupid, angry and drunk people.
Throw in paranoid and it’s a party.
.-= mrsblogalot´s last blog ..The 9 to 5 Lesbian =-.
This is the worst version of Facebook ever. It sucks.
.-= Amy (aka TheMom)´s last blog ..Happy Valentine’s Day =-.
I have been reading (and vigorously promoting among my circle of friends) your blog for only a short time but I just have to say Thank You for the lovely vlog. We love you too, Jenny.
*eeek*! I just de-lurked! *scurry*
Amy The Mom, I’ve been trying to friend you on this site for 40 minutes. I hate this FB version too. Let’s start a group called “We hate Facebook but don’t know where the fuck we are.”
Do you hear us, Facebook!? WIVES AND MOMS HATE YOU!
.-= Julie, The Wife´s last blog ..It’s Whoreticulture Friday! Issue 15 =-.
This is all awesome and I love your weekly recaps and everything…but why can’t I access my friends list?? I hate what you’ve done with this site.
.-= Mama Kat´s last blog ..My Funny Valentine -A Lesson In Grooming- =-.
Caitlin Crosby is awesome, thank you for posting her video! You can get more videos and pictures at http://www.caitlincrosby.com – she’s fantastic!
I really like that Flawless video…and I couldn’t have watched it at a better time. My self confidence kind of unsteadily dips and spikes, and day-to-day stress is an unhelpful bitch. Thanks for posting.
OH YEAH and happy Valentine’s Day! Lovelovelove
.-= Jessa´s last blog ..Thought For The Day: Let’s Get Lovey-Dovey =-.
Love the banner this week, excellent flowers. And caitlin crosby is hella cool!
http://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/db79fb5fbd31b9817a8376157640c18f
Someone should post this card on that thread about Facebook. HA HA!
Oh boy… if only those guys “excited” by fashion had been at all manly or looked remotely like they’d be interested in women…
.-= Sharon Rose´s last blog ..Sick of me yet? =-.
OMG…I haven’t laughed this much since I watched worlds dumbest criminals with commentary by Todd Bridges and Leif Garrett 🙂
.-= Jenn´s last blog ..Dear God It’s Me Jenn =-.
Thanks for the laugh…as usual….Some folks are stuck on stupid….hell, I could be one of ’em and too stupid to know it 🙁
.-= Roschelle´s last blog ..How To Have a Better Twitter Experience with Lists =-.
Facebook is an endless source of indignation, I fucking love it. When you change it, people act like you burned their church down.
.-= Bridget Callahan´s last blog ..No, really. =-.
HAHA, I love stupid people. I dunno, its sort of a self esteem thing
.-= Mesina´s last blog ..It’s a neighborhood thing =-.
The complainers in Facebook debacle give us the perfect illustration of the new word coined in a Wall Street Journal contest:
ignoranus: Someone who is stupid AND an asshole.
They’re everywhere.
We couldn’t live without them.
.-= Fishy´s last blog ..The Newspaper Update =-.
Your Valentine video was very sweet, it brought a lump to my throat.
And the flawless link was beautiful, in its own way.
Now can I just login to Facebook please?
.-= Mr Farty´s last blog ..Scientists Hate Cats =-.
Your mushy love letter video got me all choked up…I loved it, and could relate to every word you said. You’re truly one of the most hilarious, brilliant writers I’ve come across in the blog world, and you make me laugh out loud every time I visit. Just wanted to say thank you!
.-= Sweetest in the Gale´s last blog ..One Single Impression: Gold =-.
Hi Jenny,
I’ve never written before. I just watched your love letter. It’s so mesmerizing! Eloquent, and I don’t even know what —– You are captivating! (I think I know where your mind is going here – stop – I am not sexually attracted to you. )
I have been reading you blog for about a year now and love every post you do! You bring constant joy to my day and make me laugh!
So, thank you – for doing what you and bringing joy to my (and may others) life. We appreciate all you do!
Not going to lie – I read articles like that just for the stupid comments.
At that point who cares what the ACTUAL article? The real entertainment is people losing their shit over absolutely nothing, and then other stupid people yelling back. Yes please!
.-= Chickadee´s last blog ..I Thought We Lived in the SOUTH =-.
Jenny,
Loved your very lovely vlog love-letter.
Thanks for pointing out the Facebook comment stream, which really cheered me up if only for the opportunity to sneer at frustrated Facebook users and feel moderately superior for a very fleeting moment.
Jo xX
.-= Jo´s last blog ..Married people are deleting me from Facebook and I am, of course, taking offence. =-.
Stupid is funny. That is all.
.-= Zoey @ Good Goog´s last blog ..Duck is Tasty =-.
I think a lot of people are just this stupid or we could say technically stupid. I know a lot of “smart” people who still don’t know they can put an URL directly in the browswer…they still search Google using the website name…
I want Hailey’s jumper.
You can keep the tooth.