It’s not Sunday but I’m doing my weekly wrap-up early so I can tell you that you are officially invited to a party in my bathroom tomorrow (Sunday) afternoon. If you’re a regular reader you know that I have severe anxiety disorder which makes me hide in bathrooms, so every time my friends’ band (Dr. Pants) plays in Texas they ask me to come and I say I can’t really do concerts because that many people together give me agita and then they huff but they understand because that’s what friends do. What friends don’t usually do though is to finally give up on you ever going to see their band play and instead offer to come to your house and play a set in your bathroom, where you are hiding. But that’s exactly what Dr. Pants offered to do. And they also offered to broadcast it live so that you could all come to a party while hiding out in your own personal bathrooms. Which is pretty bad-ass. It’ll stream live from this link starting a 4pm central and you need to play the video below to see what you’re getting into… Dr. Pants sings about Chewbacca, Robots, Abe Lincoln and my personal favorite…”If I were John Cusack“. They are awesome. You should come. Use #pantsdance to join in the party on twitter. Invisible party favors will be given out.
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In non-related news, it’s time for the weekly wrap-up. Let’s get started, shall we? 
What you missed in my shop (tentatively called “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):
What you missed on the internets:
This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:
- LOVE.
- I suspect I might be related to this child.
- 6 Horrifying Impications of the Harry Potter Universe
- “I can assure you, I totally freaked out.”
- Very Mary Kate: It’s freezing cold under all these layers.
This week’s wrap-up sponsored by those writer-folks at Just Plain Classy, which is actually neither plain nor classy, but “Just” is a dumb name for a web series about 6 friends from a small town who are reunited after 20+ years. It’s kind of like “Friends” except instead of being hot, young hipsters hanging out in a quaint coffee shop and contemplating their future, these are middle-aged rednecks hanging out in a dive-bar. So, it’s not really like Friends. You should probably just read it.
Sorry, Mom/boss/neighbor/college friend, I can’t come to your barbeque tomorrow because I’m going to an exclusive event. A what? It’s a concert. Who’s playing? Well, it’s this really cool band that I’ve never heard of. Oh, WHERE are they playing? (mumbles) inthisstrangersbathroom. FUCK YOU! I am NOT making excuses! I totally have this stranger bathroom concert to go to! You wanna come? Um, you have to be invited…
This is one of the best concert idea ever. It’s better than being able to attend work meeting in your underwear thanks to video conferencing.
CORRECTION: This is one of the best concert ideas ever. It’s better than being able to attend work meetings in your underwear thanks to video conferencing.
Love the band name, so many places you can go with it, from “party in..” to “I’ve lost my…” to “can I get in your…”
I might have to listen to the stream.
WG
Nice bathroom. You should hold concerts there more often!
Btw, the John Cusack is a 404
I can’t wait wait to hear these guys!
Haha this is an hysterical idea… can’t wait!
Just make sure you hide your lady-stuff before anyone visits your bathroom. No one wants to see that. Don’t ask me how I know. It’s personal. Like lady-stuff personal.
I’ll be there with bells on… if only to see Juanita in all her glory. (And by there I mean that I’ll be sitting in my bathtub with my computer on my lap watching the hilarity that ensues.)
DAMN GIRL, you sure know how to cut to the head of the bathroom line at a live concert!!!!!! SCORE!!!!!!!!
I’ll have to cancel that wedding I was going to be in but it’ll totally be worth it!!!!
Rock On!!!
Totally awesome. I have a huge bathroom, maybe they can play that gig next 🙂
You officially have the coolest friends ever. And I’m jealous of your bathroom. Both for the fact that it’s gonna see more concert action than mine, which has only been the site of out of tune renditions of Led Zeppelin AND the fact that I’m pretty sure it’s bigger than my kitchen. This event is going on my iCal because my brain has been sucked out by the births of 3 children and I wouldn’t want to miss it.
And I spent way too much time on YouTube watching their videos. I totally want to be in your bathroom tomorrow.
Happy St. Patty’s Day all you crazy bloggers!
My name is Jenny, and I have a fancy bathroom.
I am cancelling ALL my Sunday plans to attend the concert in your bathroom. When I grow up, I want to be The Blogess.
OMG my first ever bathroom concert, going to wear my bestest robe and bunny slippers, Dr Pants is totally awesome!
I’m not sure how comfortable I am with encouraging the idea of pants…
Will there be CDs available at Eight Pounds of Uncut Cocaine? I will definitely need one…and some cocaine.
Oh and instead of waving a lighter I will be waving my paper Beyonce puppet
My agoraphobia is acting up just thinking about viewing the webcast. But the setlist sounds too good to pass up.
Click the website link. Someone obviously doesn’t know the value of twine.
Ohh don’t send me to cracked! Once I get on that site, i’m guaranteed to be reading articles for-ev-er.
My kind of party. Also, we can wear bathrobes, and make those awesomely attractive towel turbans for our wet hair.
Minor difference, a la the Oatmeal…in Texas, you can host a band in your bathroom; in DC, I can barely fit my laptop in my bathroom.
If I don’t have a massive migraine (based on the past week odds are not in favor of me NOT having one) I must go to my writer’s guild critique session seeing as how I have yet to make it to one this year. If I don’t go, I hope I can remember to tune in for the private concert. You know the most awesome people!! 😀
You forgot this in your wrap-up!
http://momsla.com/2012/03/lets-pretend-this-never-happened-a-review-of-the-bloggess-book/
I hope your bathroom is like the TARDIS, bigger on the inside than on the outside….
Well, as we say when we get overly excited around here, “Keep your pants on!” Yay!
Um… Now that song is stuck in my head.
Also, your bathroom is hawt.
OMG. Your bathroom is amazing! Yes, yes, I get that the concert is cool, and I loved the John Cusack song, but holy pants! Is that really your bathroom?
Before I watched the video, I was thinking, “Wow, even with a small band, how will they fit in a bathroom?” My bathroom only has room for a dog and two people if we are vertical and suck in our stomachs. You should totes rent out your bathroom for concerts on a regular basis.
Ah-may-zing!
I’d hide in your bathroom, too. It’s pretty sweet. I wish someone would write a song about my bathroom. Your friends are awesom.
as are you.
holy crap! if i had a bathroom like that i’d never come out either!
Best St. Paddy’s Day hangover present EVAH!
That is so not my bathroom. Just saying’.
Holy crap! That band is great and all, and I intend to be at the concert, but I just spent 30 minutes watching that duck video over and over again. That is so awesome! I nearly peed myself laughing. 😀
Awesome…. You have some very cool friends… and bathroom….
The acoustics in your bathroom are going to be fantastic!! Will the drummer set up in the tub?
Rock on! And your bathroom is gorgeous. No band would ever fit in mine. Not even of the one-man variety.
Just lost 34 minutes of my life to adorable animal videos in French. Thanks for that. 🙂
I love ducks. How dare the French make them so delicious.
Just whatever you do don’t flush.
Oh, oh damn. I just remembered I’m going to Stomp tomorrow afternoon. I might not be here for the concert.
Damn. SOMEONE LIGHT A LIGHTER FOR ME AT THE CONCERT.
I’m really glad you picked up your dirty underwear. That would have been embarrassing.
Best idea EVER! And with the time difference I’ll be attending the concert at 11pm so I can have a cocktail! and the kids will be sleeping! and it’ll be just like going to a real concert! plus I won’t have to wait in line to pee!
So if it’s streaming, that means if I calculate when that is in my local time wrong I’ll miss it, won’t I?
🙁
I’ll just imagine myself an amazing concert in your bathroom then, probably with Amanda Palmer stopping by for a bathroom ninja gig too.
Oh, but right at that time I am having my red dress photos done. Seriously, I really am. I am rather conflicted now….
Hell yes. That’s the best party I’ve ever sort of been invited to. Stupid time zones. I should kind of sleep at night when I have to work at an ungodly hour, but there’s no way I’m missing this.
Also: My bathroom is barely big enough to fit myself and my two hamsters. There’s hardly enough room to fart, let alone play any kind of music.
You have some pretty damn cool friends. Please accept this comment as my RSVP to attend.
I’m going to be watching from the bathroom of my apartment in Jerusalem, Israel! 11 pm on a work night, but who cares! It’s a concert from Jenny’s bathroom! Too worth it!
Oh to go back to the age when bands rewarded their faithful by playing a set in their bathrooms.
Ah, youth.
Neat! I never go to concerts… too crowded, too noisy, not my idea of fun. I’ll be tuning in!
I can’t imagine how the acoustics would be in a bathroom. Unless, of course, he’ll be singing in the shower.
KILLER! I can’t wait to attend! 🙂
WHERE UNICORN SERVANTS WILL FEED YOU DONUTS OFF OF THEIR HORNS??
Hell, I’d be happy just to see Beyonce beek you over a donut. But to have a unicorn feed it to you off of it’s horn??
Ecstasy. Total bliss.
what if we miss it? will it be available to watch later?
The bathroom, the bathroom, the bathroom, SMDH!!!
Peace, Love and Chocolate,
Tiffany
Jenny my love, what ever you do between now and then, make sure your bathroom is clean!!!!
;0)
Okay that concert in your bathroom definitely sounds like a highlight of the weekend… and one of the coolest things ever!
I hate the crowds at big shows… who can i get to come here? Hey Kelly Clarkson, come to our john… in a non-dirty way of course!!
Why are bathrooms so comforting? People should devise entire “safe houses” and “panic rooms” that give the feel of bathrooms. Where we can all feel safe and be ourselves and survive.
Party in the bathroom!!
I can’t believe how fantastic this idea is! Awesome!
Also, thanks to you and Cracked.com, I’m totally wrecked on Harry Potter now. I’m totally going to try to forget that article. LOL!
So when you first said that a band named Dr. Pants was going to play a concert in your bathroom, I was like, “Is that a new euphemism? Like ‘party in my pants’? Is the Bloggess coming on to me? How have I never heard this one before?”
Then I realized you were talking about an /actual/ concert, and I was like, “Wait, won’t that be kind of crowded?”
Your bathroom must be HUGE.
….That is not a euphemism, I promise.
….Okay so maybe a little. 🙁 But in a good way!
What an awesome idea. I had a friends band play at a house party once, but they boringly set up in the lounge. Much better acoustics in the bathroom, who gets the toilet seat?
That’s not so much a bathroom as a resort. I say this in the most respectful way, but have you considered you hide there because it’s awesome?
And I scroll up to see you have said this is not your bathroom. Now I feel sad that it isn’t and need to go hide in mine. (which isn’t all that nice)
I remember meeting you at the BlogHer party “bathroom” last year at your party!
That was awesome!
WANT!!!!!!
http://www.rugstudio.com/nuloommaisonoctopustailpurplearearug.aspx
Occasionally, there is a need to offer random weirdness.
This is one of those times.
I know Victor will just love this.
Seriously.
Sorry, that random weirdness link was supposed to be to this.
I am curious if his voice will be lower or just as high pitched in the restroom as it is my office.
~Allie
That is whole new magnitudes of awesome. Looking forward to the streaming!
I can’t even get out to go hide in the bathroom.
The hardest part is getting dressed and out of the house
============
I’m one of those partygoers that drinks up all the alcohol and stinks up the bathroom. I’m not sure if you want me there.
But, if there’s a bright side, I tell some DAMN GOOD jokes.
Q: What kind of pants does Super Mario wear?
A: Denim denim denim.
*rimshot*
My bathroom is huge, like a small house so I tend to hang out in there anyway.
It is my office/escape zone. I lock my bedroom door and my bathroom door and thinking about installing a deadbolt…you don’t know my kids.
Awesome idea! You rock!
BEST. IDEA. EVER.
I cannot wait until the concert! If Martin van Buren can maybe do a quack solo that would be great. Maybe he could do a duet with Beyonce too? Cool, thanks.
Oh wow, I’m so disappointed that that isn’t your bathroom. I don’t have high-speed internet, so I can’t watch any live streaming video, so I won’t get to see your actual bathroom. sigh. Or the concert. But now I’m really, really curious as to what your REAL bathroom looks like. (It’s true. I have no life.)
What is better than this? NOTHING! What a great idea. Dr. Pants rocks! The intro song with all of the taxidermy guest, guest shots was fab enough! On another note, Don’t know how everyone will fit in the bathroom unless someone is playing in the shower and tub, but cool just the same.
I have had a stomach ache all day…perhaps I will be watching from the bathroom, just not yours.
P.S. Did you tell Victor?
I love your Pinterest boards. 1) Big Bang drinking game. My husband explained each one. 2) My cousin sent the link to the Beyonce puppet, but she did something wrong and it went to a chicken salad sandwich. 3) Fuck You, I Am Cat. Totally my Sookie. She tortures my husband regularly. It’s why l love her most.
Ok, so while I’ve been offline most of the weekend, I do follow twitter and did come right over, and DO have the link, as I do hate to be left out. 😉
I’d like to nominate Flint as President Supreme of Unicorn Success Club… I mean, he’s *clearly* already pretty high up in the ranks of Unicorn Success Club but I think we could do with a President Supreme and I think Flint is the right kid for the job.
Pouring my beer, got my lighter (Freebird!!), I’m on my way!
Sooooo glad I read your post at 4:17 pm central time on Sunday! Not too late!
Wahhh! I want some world-famous rock star god to come and play a set for me in my bathroom. Of course, our bathroom is the size of a hamster cage (maybe smaller), so the rock star would have to play in the tub, while I sit on the potty (lid closed! pants up! *not* that kind of concert!). I would probably lose an eardrum, but it would totally be worth it.
I will start practicing my air guitar right now to get in the mood.
xxo
MOV
Thank you so much for giving me an excuse to get up off the floor and out from under my desk. I was having one of those days and wondered what the heck you were chatting about with the Pants Dance thing. Fortunately, I got to see the whole concert.
Thanks again for the fun.
Sooooo quiet at my house now that the podcast is finished . . .
Loved it!
I was hoping to participate in the reception of party favors, but I don’t tweet, and I didn’t see where else I was supposed to be “simulcasting” to read the commentary being posted by the wife? Any way you’ll have a “later, gator” giveaway?
Lovin the concert! Sadly, nothing much ever happens in my bathroom.
So I thought I had gotten in right at the beginning of the concert because when I clicked on the link it was just starting. And then I was all ‘Wow the luck!!” so I started tweeting everyone about it and to join me . I was a little suprised that more people weren’t in the social stream room and there weren’t a few more pantsdance tweets but I figured it was still early yet right? The concert just starting and all. Until someone kindly tweeted me that I was watching the rerun. I should have known as my timing is usually horrible. But just so everyone knows you can click on that and see the rerun and most things are better anyway a day later, right?!
I, like about 10 zillion others, adore reading your blog. Today, I was wandering through the market in Charleston, SC, and I saw the. most. amazing. stuffed hedgehog. She was beautiful! Seriously. I ran over, grabbed, her, turned to the boy, and said, “Hey, babe, don’t you think this would look just fabulous in our baby’s nursery?” The look on his face made me crack up….and then I stopped and thought about it and I thought of you. And then I knew I just had to take a picture for you and post it online, but we were phone (and therefore) camera-less. 🙁 Still, I thought you should know.
Best bathroom-concert I have ever been to! Thank you to Jenny and Dr. Pants. I have spent the whole evening dancing around in my underwear, singing unintelligible lines from their songs. Also, that guitarist-bear was cute! 😀
Best time I’ve ever spent in the bathroom!!! I’M NEVER WEARING PANTS AGAIN!!!!
WOLVERINE!!!!!!!
Totally unrelated but…………..if you are ever in Fredricksburg, go to Carol Hicks Bolton Antiques, on S. Lincoln St. I’m guessing you have already been there, because it is a Bloggess blog come to life. I’ll just say that I bought one of the freaky antique doll head molds, but managed to resist the taxidermidied wallaby.
Ok, couldn’t afford the wallaby. Happy now?
Don’t they have pills for that?
I’m glad I’m not John Cusack, because I really don’t want to lug around a heavy boom box to play Peter Gabriel songs all the time.
DAMMIT! *Note to self: Check thebloggess.com more often, especially on the weekend when I’m not at work not doing work related things*
I think they should set up a huge stage to look exactly like a bathroom and all the seats look like toilets. Then we can slowly move you out from the bathroom to join the rest of us crazies who are able to share our craziness with the rest of the world! CRAZY!
The End
You are by far the funniest person I’ve never met. I can’t wait for my book to arrive!!
Thank you for the Jean-Louis photo sculpture. James Garfield is an added bonus. Patiently waiting for Martin Van Buren. 🙂
I’m so insanely jealous of all these people talking about their huge bathrooms, even though my heart of hearts know that a bathroom in small homes (like in DC) is just a waste of space if it can fit more than one person and a blowdryer. Whenever I travel, I stay in luxury hotels, and the bathroom is the first thing I check out and I spend an inordinate amount of time in there. I’m bathroom bipolar, y’all. 🙂
Hi just wanted to put it out there that in the “shit I didn’t come up with” section, I clicked on the link that showed a star wars pic and my computer immediately freaked out and the virus warning popped. It was infected with the “security shield” virus. Spent the whole day trying to fix my computer. All’s good now but thought I’d let people know. Not sure if it happened to anyone else. Just in case…this is a link to the site that helped showed me how to clean it out for free…worked great!
http://www.bleepingcomputer.com/virus-removal/remove-security-shield
I got in a little late to the party but it was still awesome!!!!!!
I so want to read the book, love the excerpts so far….excited for you:-)
I feel like a Dr. Pants Hipster! they are awesome. I’ve been getting their emails for a couple of years after I followed them on twitter (when I was still on there). How cool for both of y’all!!
I was having one of those days and wondered what the heck you were chatting about with the Pants Dance thing. Fortunately, I got to see the whole concert. Asia Cycling Tours
Wahhh! I want some world-famous rock star god to come and play a set for me in my bathroom. Of course, our bathroom is the size of a hamster cage (maybe smaller), so the rock star would have to play in the tub, while I sit on the potty (lid closed! pants up! *not* that kind of concert!). I would probably lose an eardrum, but it would totally be worth it. k eta
I should kind of sleep at night when I have to work at an ungodly hour, but there’s no way I’m missing this. Also: My bathroom is barely big enough to fit myself and my two hamsters. There’s hardly enough room to fart, let alone play any kind of music.