“LOVE ME MORE, SMALL HUMAN.”

in Random Crap

I tweeted this but some people can’t see it so I’m putting it here.

The cat has taught my daughter a trick. I’m very…proud?

"LOVE ME." on Twitpic

260 thoughts on ““LOVE ME MORE, SMALL HUMAN.””

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  3. Well, now you know she’s trainable. You’re not going to fall for that, “But I don’t know how to unload the dishwasher/fold and put away my clothes/detail your car” shit again.

  5. If only I could get my cat to do anything that nice and adorable. All I get are claws. Lots and lots of claws.

  10. Your daughter has the best smile.

    Cats. Such demanding little things. They really do rule the house, don’t they?

  13. I have a cat that does stuff like this. You stop petting her before she’s done she’ll grab your arm and pull on it. Cats are adorable, goofy, crazy things.

  19. My dog does something similar to this. She will also pull on your shoulder with her paw so she can smell your breath. My son is always teaching her new “tricks” that are actually just more ways she can control me.

  20. The best is when a cat is “training” you and you don’t do something…and they look at you like you’re an idiot. I would pay to hear the inner monologue of my cat some days!

  21. My parents’ Weimerainers will walk past you, then back up so you can scratch their butt. If you don’t, they’ll turn and stare at you until you do.

  22. My cat does that, but only when I have a bag of chips. She likes chips.

  23. I could stand to learn a new trick or two. Could your cat teach me ? I’m a fast learner. Really. (Love how your daughter’s blouse sparkles – like her smile!)

  30. Oh man, I’d like to bottle that smile and pull it out on bad days. I’ll bet her laugh sparkles like her shirt.

  31. My cat does this too except she scratches me when she does it, so not nearly as cute as this.

  35. My cat does the same thing. Nobody will ever convince me that cats are “aloof”; they want our love and attention as much as any dog

  37. Awesome! I finally put a bullet in my twitter so I’m glad you shared the joy here too.

  41. Proof that cats rule the world.

    Or at least they think they do. Or maybe it’s they make us think they do.

    Either way they think they do. I think?

  43. interesting – my heart came out a question mark – sry world, I guess I should have RTFM

  46. Your cat is much nicer than any I’ve had! Mine would come up and bump her head against me to be petted. I’d pet her and she’d bite me. Definition of ‘conflicted’ I guess!

  48. Your daughter looks like you! She’s adorable.
    Cats are very good at training their humans to serve them. I’m basically my cat’s servant. Before you know it your daughter will be following the cat around having one-sided conversations filled with odes about how wonderful the cat is. It’s a very sneaky sort of brainwashing.

  49. One of my cats does something similar! If I hold my hand above her hand, she’ll reach up with both paws and pull my hand down to pet her head. It’s adorable.

  51. My dog does something similar. If you’re petting her and stop, and she’s not ready for you to stop she swats at your hand to get you to keep petting her. So cute.

  52. I love cats… even if they do make me sneeze. This is adorable.

    Here’s a second bit of joy in case you or your readesr haven’t seen it : http://www.upworthy.com/some-geek-boys-called-these-geek-girls-fake-they-certainly-wont-be-making-that-mistake-again-7

    Have I thanked you lately for re-introducing me (electronically) to Wil Wheaton? Everything I read about him makes him seem even nicer…it’s strangely reassuring that someone can be a famous kid in Hollyweird and come out nice.

  53. Cats are so good at training us! My cat would hold my hand tight with both his paws so I wouldn’t stop petting him. He also grabbed my hand and put it on him to pet him. And he would hold my hand.

  54. Cute!

    My Great Dane has taught me to rub his belly when he lays on his side and reaches out his paw. I realized he had me trained when I passed him by, but went back to pet him.

  56. Cats are so funny. Your daughter is adorable. Thanks for putting this on here, somehow I still haven’t taken the time to figure out Twitter… I totally would have missed out!

  57. Love seeing all the taxidermy in the background! You need to post more pics of how the whole gang looks! Well maybe not because your fans might start to side with Victor on the ‘you don’t need more’ taxidermy.

  58. Our pets are always better at training us than we are at training them. Our yorkie learned that scratching on the back door would get us out of the chair to let him out. When we’d get to the back door, he’d run to the cabinet for a treat and THEN beat us back to the chair we had been sitting in so he could have the warm spot.

  59. I can hold my hand out and I have a cat who will sit up on his back legs and pet /himself./ Really just headbutt my hand. I can also hold out a finger and he’ll noseboop himself. JC’s a pretty low-maintenance cat in many ways.

  66. My dog has taught us the same trick. Cats and dogs, working together, plotting the end of the world.

  67. But now you have to tell us the story of the Ginormous Revolver on your taxidermy wall.

  68. Hehehe my younger cat does that when I am sitting at the computer working, she will grab my hands until I scratch her, or she will jump on the back of my chair and wrap herself around my neck 🙂

  69. I’m having trouble focusing on the cat and the little girl. Can’t stop staring at the wall of heads in the background. And the giant gun.

  71. My cat has a similar trick, but he prefers to pull the hand to his mouth and lick it for five minutes. And he’ll make ample use of his dagger claws if the trapped person attempts to pull away. So cute.

  76. I had a rescued kitty (who we adopted at the age of 13) who did this. She was mostly blind and declawed, and purred so loud you could hear her across the house. She would sit on the back of a chair and reach out for a hand to pull to her to pet her, while she purred up a storm. We called referred to her as The Queen. She unfortunately passed away a year later, but we loved her and her sweet, sweet demand for love!

  79. Seriously. They totally train us to dance to their whims. “Oh you want to eat? Of course I will stop researching the cure for cancer to get you a treat.”

  80. my cats trick is thinking he is a zomby and nawwing at my head with breath and sharp teeth, in the morning before i’ve woken up .
    Your trick is a lot more plesant.

  86. a little bit to the left, no a little bit to the right, I am pretty sure I didn’t say we were done did I?????…. ohhhh yes, that’s spot. Kitties truly do rule the house and everyone in them whether we want to openly admit it or not. Insert evil kitten laugh……Booohahahahahahaa……meow 🙂 Your daughter is adorable Treasure every moment, they grow up way too quickly (My peanut, is 26. I swear, it was like I had her yesterday; it went by in a flash. Sniffle) .

  87. Love the cat, but the LARGE ass gun hanging on the wall?
    Can I see you holding that please. Now that would be an AWESOME SAUCE picture.

  90. It’s always fun when cats adopt us and then train us. I never wanted a cat and somehow I have six. Plus various other stray’s in the neighborhood. They crowned me Crazy Cat Lady. There was a coronation and everything.

  91. Not to neglect the genius cat and daughter, but I really enjoy the extension cord and powerstrip precariously placed in the middle of the floor close enough to the wall where one could grab the gun when falling to their death.

  93. My cat does that with Cheez-Its and Cream Cheese. It’s decidely less cute when your lunch ends up on your cat’s head instead of in your stomach. I have to lock him in the other room if I’m going to eat them unless I wanted a large clawed paw pulling my hand down to his face every five seconds.

  95. My cat, Cricket, used to bug me crazy when I was eating because she was sure she wanted some. She really doesn’t like most people food, so I started offering her my food so she could smell it, recoil, and give it the stinkeye,

    Now I have a hard time not offering my food to the cats where I live, because I was well trained for 10 years.They really really like people food, but I’m the one that gets scolded.

  98. Adorable! Our cat has us trained with just a sound and we automatically pet her. It would be horrifying if it weren’t so damn adorable

  99. A talented puss! Now you need to train kitty to pee in the shower; you’ll divert that money from cat litter to kiddo’s college fund! My two kitties–OLIVE and MARTINI–love to pee in the shower.

  102. It’s amazing how demanding cats are and how well they train us puny humans. My cats have trained me to get up at 4am to feed them. It’s really quite annoying.

  104. I think they’re ready for America’s Got *some* Talent? BTW – the mounted heads in the background speak volumes (along with the Butch Cassidy rifle?). ;o)

  107. love it. even better than the trick itself is the fun your daughter seems to have 🙂

    but holy shit, what is that giant gun on your wall underneath the taxidermy???

  110. Ahahaha, I love this! My girlfriend’s cat has taught me a trick. It’s called Kicking It Out of the Bedroom in the Middle of the Night Because It’s Annoying.

  116. One of my cats does that. His favorite time to do it is when I’m stark naked after a shower, and if I don’t pet him when he demands it, he tries to lick my boob. I pet his furry self, because boob-licking cats = AWKWARD.

  122. Now you just have to figure out how to train your cat to train your daughter what you want her to do – and maybe train the cat to train your husband, too. Then you’re all set.

  129. Twitter?! No wonder I miss all the good stuff from you 🙁 Please get an Instagram account soon! I need your craziness to balance out all the artistic food shots and pictures of people’s adorable babies on my feed. It SHOULD look more like this:

    Adorable baby
    Taxidermied ballerina parrot
    Lovely slice of magazine-cover worthy cake
    Hunter S. Thomcat wearing a bonnet
    Updated headshot of Beyonce

    And then post a blog about it, of course, because if you mention it on Twitter, I’ll never know 😉

  131. The only thing my dog has taught me, is that I need to check my bedding for bones before I have a gentleman caller. Nothing a man loves more than to be in mid-seduction and roll over a wad of wet, chewed up rawhide.

    More popular than oral. Truly.

  134. WOW!! Your daughter looks just like you.. 🙂 I also have a cat who decides when it’s time for me to wake up, with a paw in the mouth, nose or side of your head..CONSTANTLY until you get up. Can’t throw her off the bed, she runs before you can grab her..AND to totally fuck up my sleep she weaves in between the blinds with her body over and over so the blinds are constantly ‘clinking’ together! i swear she’s so smart. I wanna kill her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  135. It may be cute when a 15 pound cat does it.
    It’s not so cute when our 50 pound husky flays the flesh off of your arm with his claws of death when he feels highly needy (_all the time_).

  137. My fucking guinea pig has me trained. I think Hailey is a step up the ladder from me.

  138. Cute! If there’s sound, my crappy laptop won’t play it. Your daughter is lovely.
    I had a handsome tuxedo cat who would bat a ping pong ball back at me when I would lob it at him.
    Isn’t amazing how our feline and canine friends “train” us? If it weren’t for the fact that we can open their food containers, we’d be much lower on the food chain.

  139. It is ALL part of their master plan! You know like our mostly black cat who runs into a dark room ahead of me…silly little asshole ninjas.

  140. So, noticing all the taxidermied animals in the background, I have to ask – don’t your cats bother them? Or at least try to sleep on them? Cat thought process:
    1) up high so I can look down on humans? check
    2) warm and fuzzy? check
    3) something that will annoy my owner? check

  141. Awww…Hailey looks so much like you! And yes, the furry little boogers are so good at training us, aren’t they? I know Jezebel has me stepping and fetching for her…I swear, she picked me out in the shelter; she knew a sucker when she saw one!

  142. AAAwwwwwwww!

    PS I’ve been reading your memoir to my dad while he’s been in bad shape recovering from a fall, and thank you for helping make him laugh.

  143. Love your kitty and kiddo! Love even more the powerstrip in the middle of the floor – is it providing power to the kitty, kiddo or both? In all seriousness, you are blessed with a beautiful daughter. I have a son her age and he would be thrilled if my 15-year-old kitty would interact with him that way!

  146. It must be nice to have such a loving kitty. Mine is a fat, fuzzy, constantly-shedding wad of hell-born derision the color of a stepped-on Reese’s cup and makes aromas that are probably withering the rainforest as I type. Her only mission in life is to annoy us, but somehow she completes our little family.

  148. Awww…it reminds me of my cat Pusa years ago. (Pusa is cat in Pilipino… i know!) He loved being petted, too. I would just wiggle my fingers in front or near his face, and he would start purring really loudly because he just knew he’d be getting some serious petting. (That does not sound right, but you get what I’m saying.)

  149. This morning I all but died from the cuteness.. this evening I had to return.. the look of joy on your daughter’s face.. the kitty demanding love! oh… so cute. I have two cats, Mischief and Mayhem. Today Mayhem was diagnosed with asthma.. it looks like a minor case, but still, my baby. The girls are 10 months old.. my how time flies.

  151. I think you should be proud. The siamese we had when I was young (and sick a lot because I was allergic to cats and parents back then didn’t have you tested all the time) that would grab you with both paws if you tried to move away. It’s all heartwarming until you realize that you never get a backrub from them in return. Is that too much to ask?

  152. Whore kitty! My cat does a similar thing….when you pull out the brush for the dog she comes running OUT OF NOWHERE and grabs the brush to groom herself. She could be in a dead sleep (20 hours out of the day, c’mon) and appears out of nowhere to interject herself between the brush and the dog.

  153. I’ve been thinking a lot about cutting recently. . .
    My marriage imploded in January and things are getting back on track for me, I’m looking at buying a house and am doing well. . .but; I’ve been thinking about cutting.
    I just feel like there is so much going on inside that I’m like a pressure cooker, I just need some little cuts so the emotions can bleed out (pun sort of intended). . .
    Sorry for posting this on such a happy (and cute) post, but I needed to reach out to someone and yes, I have friends, but not ones who would understand. I don’t want them to freak out, or judge me. Or, even; talk me out of it. Not that I’m planning on actually doing it; but I feel that if they were to try and talk me out of it and then I did it anyway – their disappointment would be hell.
    I’m not looking for anyone to condone it either.
    I guess I’m looking for “I get that you are thinking this and I will talk you through the feelings at any point, but if you do cut, that’s OK too – we’ll put a plaster [band-aid/bandage, I don’t know what Americans call them] on it and move on; no judgement, no disappointment” and I kinda figured that if I would get that anywhere, it would be from the Lawsbian community. . .
    I’ve been thinking a lot about cutting recently, small cuts to relieve some pressure. . . .I’m trying not to act on it; but the feelings are getting “bigger” and the thoughts are getting louder. . .

    (You’re not alone and I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this. The thing that helped me is talking to someone on the suicide hotline. They understand and they can talk you through it. They gave me a lot of alternatives that helped me not self-harm, like squeezing ice in my hands until it ached and hurt, or like snapping a rubber band on my wrist so that it mimicked the pain without opening it up to infection. Behavioral therapy for Impulse Control Disorder is also helpful. Also, making it harder to get at the parts I wanted to hurt is good. Like, I often hurt my scalp so I’ll put coconut oil all over it and that makes it yuckier to touch. It’s ridiculous, but it works. I’m sending you such love. You aren’t alone. You aren’t crazy. ~ Jenny)

  154. The cat trick is insanely cute, but I absolutely LOVE your house… at least the part of it I can see in the video. It’s nice and bright and open and everything. 😀

  155. That’s adorable; cats are the absolute best entertainment.

    I LOVE that big ass gun hanging on your wall!

  160. The world now belongs to the cats. All non-cat-having humans should vacate the planet in search of safety lest we be deemed superfluous and/or tasty.

  161. You have an adorable cat and a lovely daughter. We are adding it in our website ohmagif.com with linking credits back to this blog. Thanks for such a cute and adorable gif. 🙂

  163. I would definitely be proud. Whenever my cat puts his paw out like that, it’s usually because he’s attacking us.

  164. What’s the deal with the surge protector. At first I thought it was an ocean liner!

  165. Cats are the best! My little Cat Benatar has taken to following the dogs and I DEEP into the woods on our walks. She runs along with the dogs for nearly a mile, periodically launching her feline body onto and off of trees to show off her cat prowess. Then she pants like a dog when she gets tuckered out. Oh, cats…

  166. I need your cat to teach that to my husband, except the cat’s paw is my husband’s hand and your daughter’s head is my daughter’s dirty-diapered ass.

    Which is not meant to draw connection between your faighter’s precious head and my faighter’s stink. That part, just a metaphor.

  167. Our kitty, Allison, would never dream of doing this. She’s far too lazy. Fabulous, but lazy. She just flops on her back with her legs in 4 different directions, and says, “Pet me wherever. My whole furry body is a sweet spot.”

    I’ve never owned a cat before. I’m a mouse person, actually. But Allison belonged here. Every day is a little glimpse into the superior kitty brain.

  169. My cat, Meg, does the same thing, but she’ll hold your hand on her head for several minutes until she feels like you’ve scritched her enough. But, of course, she lets you know this by trying to bite off one of your fingers.

    What non-cat people don’t seem to understand is that the cat will tell you how to scratch them on the head. I can just hold my hand in one place and make that scritchy move and she’ll move her head around to get whatever spot she needs massaged.

    Also, your daughter’s smile is so fantastic.

  171. Our cats do a similar thing. They are both nose-lickers and will reach out with a paw — occasionally with claw extended — to pull that nose within licking range.

  172. Amber (Comment 153) You are NOT alone. Depression lies. Even Jenny says so. Please don’t cut yourself, it doesn’t make the hurt inside go away, even if it does feel better for a little while. Is it possible for you to find someone you can talk to? I understand if you feel your friends aren’t a good option, but is there anyone else? A crisis hotline? A relative? A therapist? It sounds like you have a lot of stuff you need to talk about Amber and hurting yourself won’t help, I promise. I’m also certain that there are risks involved with that and if you do something that a plaster can’t cover, then I’m also certain that there are people in your life who would be really sad because I’m sure that they care very much about you and wouldn’t want anything to happen to you. I don’t know you Amber but it was brave of you to share the things that you did and I am thinking of you and hoping that you can find someone to talk to.

  173. This is excellent! And it’s just a joy to see how happy it makes your daughter.

  175. Our cat has trained us to do that too. Only we have to do it on the bathroom counter because that is the only cat approved petting spot. And sometimes she wakes Cat Dad up at 2 am because that is when she wants her pets. She doesn’t wake me up because waking me up from a dead sleep is taking your life in your hands.

  179. this ended up on 9Gag, Jenny! The comments are killing me. “Does the cat on the wall have a tophat??” “Am I the only one seeing the strange taxidermy?” hahaha.

  182. Fun Fact: I saw this posted on a different website. As impressed as were all were with the fact the cat was teaching, there was a rather in depth discussion as to what the heck the gun was for.

    Now that I know it’s yours, it all makes much, much more sense.

    Not sure it that’s good or bad. o_O

  183. Amazing how I can’t train the cats to clean their box but they can train me to pet and cuddle them. They are truly sneaky.

  184. I hope your cat’s claws aren’t out – Holly our cat does this but with claws – the bitch. I love your daughter!!!!!!

  187. So adorable! And going viral, apparently. I saw it on Reddit yesterday, with no context. At least a few people spoke up and said it was from your blog (I’m not registered, I just lurk there.)

  189. Hi! I’ve lurked on your blog for awhile. I think we would get along famously. Anyway, I’m participating in GISHWHES (the Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen). It began today and goes for a week. (GISHWHES.com) One of the items on our hunt is – Taxidermy animals dressed for and playing or doing one of the following: roller derby, doubles tennis in whites, a 4-some of golfers (must be traditionally dressed with knickers) cricket players in whites, disco dancing (in 70’s clothes), synchronized swimming (with nose clips) or a karate class (black belts). Since I’ve been following you, I know the joy you get from dressing up dead animals so I thought I’d take a long shot to see if you’d help me. Thanks for your time.

  193. Dearest Jenny,

    I too just experienced a murderous gall bladder, which was removed quickly (within 10 hours of my arrival at the emergency room) and thankfully without incident (minus having five new holes in my body repaired by surgical glue – which they tell me is perfectly normal). I beg you, please, don’t have any more organs removed; my body can’t take it. It has clearly taken the empathy factor too far.

    Lady Macbeth

    P.S. Adorable post with your daughter and cat. That’s exactly what I needed to make me smile right now; in 10 minutes, when I shut my computer down and can no longer see a cat demand petting, the pain meds should be filling in instead in the humor department. On a similar note, my dog is doing an excellent job of training my fiance, and I am quite proud of her efforts.

  194. Feel like a creep posting this under your adorable daughter and cat trick, but you are THE most famous person I know.. I know I don’t know you but I feel as if I do. I would email you but I’m not sure how and its 3am so I feel as if this is the best my brain can do. I am from southern Illinois and a horrible thing happened here last year. If we could get some more attention it would be helpful. The issue has been on good morning America, but it was on a Saturday morning episode an I’m not sure it was the best time slot. We would love if Nancy Grace or someone like her would pick it up. I will shut up now and post what my rambling is about. Even if you don’t read this Jenny hopefully one of your followers will and one more person will know about Molly Young.

    ” As many of you know, our beloved Molly Marie Young was stolen from us on Saturday, March 24 2012. Molly was called to the Carbondale apartment of a former boyfriend around 3:00 A.M. that morning with a plea of “Help me”. He had been drinking the night before but Molly had no alcohol in her system. She was killed by a gunshot wound to the top left side of her head shortly afterwards.
    Molly was right handed, the gunshot was on the left side of her head at a downward angle, and the handgun (a .45 semiautomatic model 1911) used to end her life belonged to her former boyfriend. Molly was not familiar with guns, and had a dislike of them. The 911 call was made by her former boyfriend’s roommate at 9:02 A.M., at least 4 to 5 hours after the time of death. It was reported as a drug overdose on the 911 call. Molly’s body had been moved before the first responders arrived. She had fresh bruises all over her body, her former boyfriend had fresh scratches on his side, his DNA was under her fingernails. Her former boyfriend, an employee of the Carbondale Police Department, had blood on his clothing. Molly had no powder residue on her hands and her fingerprints were not on the gun. Her former boyfriend’s father and lawyer were at the scene before Illinois State Police were able to arrive on scene, and the Carbondale Police allowed her former boyfriend to wash his hands and change his clothing before evidence was gathered.
    Since Molly’s passing her former boyfriend refuses to cooperate with the Illinois State Police Investigators. According to Illinois State Police reports her ex-boyfriend would NOT consent to DNA testing, blood samples, urine samples, or fingernail clippings. Also, he would NOT consent to a search of his apartment, his cell phone, or his vehicle. Molly was left to lay in his bedroom floor for 7 hours after the 911 call until search warrants were signed. He has refused even to be interviewed! When authorities were able to obtain and examine both his cell phone and Molly’s both showed signs of tampering, and nothing was recoverable. The Illinois State Police were forced to waste time and resources to get a warrant for every part of the investigation, nothing was volunteered, no cooperation was ever extended. Her former boyfriend did, and has done, everything possible to hinder and slow the investigation. Despite this no progress has been made, no charges have been filed, and no justice has been served.”

    Please help her family even if you just try to trend it on twitter. The family needs help from someone to get it going really big. There is a Facebook group called Justice for Molly and also a website- http://justiceformolly.org/
    Any help is appreciated, even good thoughts their way!

  195. Jenny – thank you for your reply and for your suggestions; I currently have a hair-tie around my wrist that I am occasionally snapping. . .So far I have been able to re-direct my energies elsewhere – including going to the gym and doing housework until I am body-tired so that even if/when my insomnia kicks in I am too physically tired to do anything. . .
    Jackie (comment 172), thank you.

    Both of you helped more than you can know simply by reminding me I’m not alone, and that depression lies so I shouldn’t listen to it when it tells me my friends will judge/not understand. . .I’m trying to reach out to them more, I’m trying to just reach out more in general. . .

  198. Our cat does that, too…if you say, “High Five” right before the cat grabs your hand and then when the cat reaches out, high five it instead of letting it take your hand, you can con people into thinking you trained your cat to give high fives. Great party trick, and you get all the cat haters to tell people how they hate all cats except yours because its the coolest, most talented cat on the planet.

  199. Ahh…yes…human training. My Meow found the one extremely LOUD toy that gives me fits with Yoda Quotes. One night, the Meow set off the toy so that I could wake up, scream at toy, and in my momentary awake-ness con cuddles and ear scratches out of me. Then the meow would wait until I was back to sleep, set off the toy again, and show up for scratches. It took me three times to figure out I was being “trained”. I then found the toy in the cat cave and threw it down the stairs. Three days later, the training began again. Toy is now in trash and meow is hunting for something else to train me with.

  200. You’re abnosome–that magical combination of abnormal and awesome all at the same time.

  201. Love this ! The smile on your little girl’s face made my day ! So stinkin cute

  204. I just wanted to come here to say that I read Amber’s post above about thinking about cutting and I’ve been thinking about her. Don’t judge me- but I’ll pray for her.. for peace and strength and hope, we all need those things, right?
    I hope she reaches out to professionals for help and I think coming to you was an excellent(!!!) first step. Sometimes our shit is just so big that…ugh, it’s overwhelming

    I’m thinking about you, Amber.. you’re totally not alone today. I’ve got your back, even if it’s just virtually

  210. Yeah, you made the front page of Imgur, but someone made it into a gif and put their own watermark on it and gave you no credit. Internet people are dicks

  212. My cat does something like that…only rather than being adorable if he wants affection he bites your hand until you give in.

    Petting through violence!

  214. We almost named one of our cats Romeo because he’s so affectionate, but his way of asking for more love isn’t quite as cute: he bites at your hand. Gently, because he wants it to be in good condition for the petting. But still.

  216. I’m sorry….was I supposed to notice anything at all about your cat and child, when there is, what appears to be, a GINORMOUS revolver hanging on your wall? I’m assuming that is for the sole purpose of shooting a bigfoot?

  218. my first thought was “i would love to see this kids friends faces the first time they come to her house”.

  225. That is just too damned adorable! I have a Giant Monster Cat (Welly) who will headbutt me and walk on top of me incessantly until I pet and snuggle her.

  226. Humans (especially small ones) are so trainable.
    My cats have their own list of their stupid human tricks. Mainly me getting up and throwing their toys for them when they can’t be bothered to get up and get them themselves.

  227. I love this! You have the most affectionate cats and Hailey could not be cuter. She has a beautiful smile.

    Beth

  228. So… As a long-standing member of your tribe, I must express my serious concern with your lack of an app. Who doesn’t want access to The Bloggess right there on their phone and/or handheld device?!?! Clearly, people not in The Know – that’s who.

    Dear fellow fans: surely one of you is capable of alleviating my problem. I’ll be eternally grateful to whomever creates an app to this wildly entertaining world that Jenny calls Life.

    Thank you!

  229. My dog taught my 81 yr old neighbor to give him no less than 20 treats everytime he gets out and runs over there. She in turn taught him German. Now when I tell him to do something he just stares at me like screw you the old lady next door gives me treats.

  230. My cat does this too, and occasionally sends my cell phone flying out of my hand. Which is fine if it doesn’t hit him in the head in the process.

  231. Why is it that the grey cats are grabbiest? Our two tigers don’t touch us unless they are starving. and unlike dogs…. they don’t fake the starving well. But the grey cat? Grabby.
    Can haz ur leg? Can haz ur food?
    That’s for me right? I knew it. Thnx.
    I want your arm.
    He can wrap his paws around a wrist and fall asleep in seconds if you let him. Just reaches up like he has opposable thumbs or something and swipes whatever it is he isn’t supposed to have ESPECIALLY if it is hot. The other two? Nothing to see here folks, move a long. And the black cats I’ve had aren’t like that. Just the greys.

  232. I saw this pop up on Imgur last night, and my first thought was “Oh! That’s The Bloggess’s little one! That’s a big rifle on the wall!”

  233. Jenny, this post has gone viral! It is on Meta Picture (random site filled with gif’s and funny posts)

  234. My head just exploded from the adorableness.
    (sorry, landlord. The security deposit’s yours to keep).

  236. Sure the cat looks adorable now. You won’t think it’s so cute when you wake up one morning to see the cat with the car keys in it’s mouth and you know you have to drive it to the airport and then fly it 1st class to Spain just for fresh seafood and you have to dip into your daughters college fund to pay for it.

  237. aww, that is so cute. My cat has trained me really well, he smacks me on the shoulder when he requires pets and if he thinks he needs combing he grabs the comb off the desk. He also has certain call when demanding a drink of water from the bathtub faucet. I’m always telling him “obnoxious cat is obnoxious” but I’m too well trained to stop responding…

  242. Jenny – your daughter and cat – ADORABLE!! Amber (153) hang in there – lots of us here with you. Let us know how you are doing. And don’t listen to the Bitch Depression. She is a liar!!

  243. My dogs are such slackers. They haven’t taught me any tricks at all…hold on a second I’ve got to get them some biscuits I will be right back…

  246. I gotta say, the weirdest thing is not the cat. It is not the taxidermied animal heads, nor is it the GIANT FUCKING GUN on the wall. I wanna know what is plugged into the random power strip on the floor. I would trip on that thing and break my friggin’ foot. Or my face, or somehow both. So, what is worthy of such a dangerous power strip? (Please tell me one of the animal heads is plugged into that!…)

  247. The cat has created an automatic human petter for whenever the cats feels like being rubbed AND made the human happy to do so. I mean just look at your daughter’s smile. She’s happy petting the cat.
    The cat is probably being all snarky as in, “I’m getting you to do work and you’re SMILING? *huff* Don’t expect ME to do ANY work for you! “

  250. I’m slightly high on lack of sleep. or sleepiness. I drank a godawful chamomile-strawberry smoothie (I blenderized real berries, I’m not sure how it got to be kinda gaggy tasting) to relax my anxiety-muscles but i still can’t sleep so i’m wibblywobbly and floaty, but not sleeping.
    so i keep watching this clip over and over and over. and over. and over. it’s hypnotic.

  251. Very cute… although I can’t stand cats, or really children if we’re all be honest…
    (ignore the little hoodlum band I mean, jazz band website).

    The best part of that video is what I think can only be described as the hand cannon you have mounted on the wall…

    I assume this is a emergence zombie apocalypse weapon… since living in Texas as you do, I think we can all safely assume the zombies will be driving Suburbans, Escalades and Navigators (maybe the really posh zombies will arrive in Range Rovers)… and that thing looks like it would have no problem stopping a 6000lb SUV…

    Way to be prepared…

  252. Well there’s no denying that your child and you are related, she looks identical to you.

  258. What you didn’t see was the clicker thingy and the treats your cat dished out to your daughter to get her interested in doing the trick. Next cat will teach girl to ride a bicycle on a little wire strung between two tables or to jump through a flaming hoop….

  260. Reminds me of the videos for “Teach Me How To Doughie”. Are the kids still Dougie-ing these days? Either way, cute trick!

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