Accidentally doing good things.

You know how every year we do some sort of fundraiser for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa in hopes of getting my taxidermied boar head canonized by the Pope?  Well, I was just thinking that now that we have a new, slightly-less-creepy Pope, James Garfield might finally have a chance at sainthood.  But then I started looking at Hanukkah and turns out it ends day after tomorrow.  I yelled at several Jewish friends for not letting me know this earlier and they apologized, saying “Um…we’re busy with Hanukkah, bitch.  Maybe get a fucking calendar.”  And one of them said something in Yiddish that I think translates to “YOU SHOULD LAUGH WITH LIZARDS“, which is an actual real insult and makes me want to take Yiddish classes.

Regardless, if you’ve been here long enough you probably know all about (or were a part of) The Many Miracle(s) of James Garfield.  The first came in 2010 when we all accidentally came together to raise over $42k to help get presents for kids who would not have otherwise gotten any.  It was awesome, and the next year tons of people who were helped in the past asked if we could do it again because now they were back on their feet and wanted to pass on the gift they’d received, but I couldn’t do it because I was so exhausted from running it that I got really sick.  Sorry.  I’m too shitty to be successfully philanthropic.  So instead, in 2011 we decided to help Project Night Nighta program that donates over 25,000 free packages to homeless children (containing  a new security blanket, a book, a stuffed animal and a tote bag) every year.  With our help they were able to donate the 750 packages they needed to hit all of the kids on their December list.  And in 2012 we donated a shitload of oxen to India (which seems weird, but awesome) and helped Project Night Night hit their goal of getting packages to 1,427 children affected by Hurricanes.

This year we’re going to switch it up and give 1,427 oxen to small children.  Or maybe we’ll just do what we did last year again. Because homeless kids being trampled by oxen seems slightly less festive.

It’s crazy simple to donate.  An entire package for Project Night Night only costs $20.  Plus, you can donate packages as presents in the name of all the people that you don’t want to send real gifts too.  Or you can donate bees in the name of people you don’t like.  For real.  It’s probably the worst present ever.  “For Christmas I bought you a big bag of angry bees.  Happy holidays, asshole.”  Except the bees go to needy people who’ll actual use them for pollination and honey and stuff.  But you could probably put one live bee in the “I donated in your name” envelope if you wanted to.  Or just put poison on the card.  Whatever.  I’m not here to judge you.

Want to donate?  Of course you do.  Just click here and you can donate directly to Project Night Night or here to donate to Heifer.  I’m starting it off by donating a llama in your name.  Yes, you.  I also bought 20 Project Night Night bags in your name in case you can’t afford to donate this year.

PS.  Don’t sweat it if you can’t afford to donate this year.  You can always share the Project Night Night page online or with friends to help spread the word.  Every little bit counts.

PPS.  I’m ccing the Pope on this one.  I’m pretty sure he needs to know about this shit.

James Garfield cannot tell a lie. He's like George Washington, but with his original teeth.

Happy holidays, you guys.  Thank you for being awesome.  You are worth ALL the llamas.

PPPS.  I have a ton of James Garfield holiday cards in my desk.  I’ll pick a bunch of people to randomly send them to in the comments.  Just leave a comment letting me know something nice you’re doing for someone else, if you can.

PPPPS.  Just a small update:  The Project Night Night folks emailed to tell me they received over $12,700 in donations in just the first day this post was up and donations are still flowing in.  They wanted to say thank you and so do I.  I don’t say it enough…I so adore you people.  Thank you for letting me be part of this amazing community.

PPPPPS. Just got an email from the very surprised Heifer people, who said to say thanks and that “the spike in numbers from your website was really impressive to the tune of more than 1K visitors and over $4K worth of bees!”  BEST ANGRY BEE CHRISTMAS EVER!

665 thoughts on “Accidentally doing good things.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I would totally take a big bag of angry bees. My mother-in-law ordered my four-year-old a bucket of 15,000 ladybugs from Amazon for her birthday last year (it’s totally a real thing) and I could get her back.

  2. Sending a poisoned card through the mail is a federal offense punishable by fine and/or imprisonment. I’m sending bees just to be safe.

    Cheers to philanthropy 🙂

  3. I can see llamas from my house.

    That’s all. I just felt like people here might understand exactly how rad that is.

    P.S. I just named one of them Jenny.

    P.P.S. I plan to eat the llamas when the zombie apocalypse arrives.

    P.P.P.S. But I’ll save Jenny as long as possible.

    P.P.P.P.S. OR I’ll eat Jenny first to spare her the horrors of the zombie apocalypse and watching all her friends be murdered for food.

  4. I love you, Jenny. I want to be just like you when I grow up. I’ve got the depression and neurotic anxiety down pat. I need to work on the bitter sarcasm masking the glowing wonderful that emanates from your orifices. Like glitter mist out your nostrils. I’m going to stop now. Let’s just look around the room awkwardly now.

  5. I think that the llamas are perfect. I recently found this video, which does for llamas what Charlie did for unicorns:

    You’re welcome.

  6. This will be my third year getting my dad a “pig” for Christmas. He writes the meat ad for Kroger so it’s really kinda neat. I love this time of year! I will be helping with the Night Night organization this year too. Thanks for the link!

  7. Love this. And I love Heifer International. For my 40th birthday, I asked people to donate to Heifer instead of buying me gifts I didn’t really need. I want good things to happen to people who need them most.

  8. James Garfield should be a saint. Get on that Pope Francis.

    Our office does a toy drive every year for local underpriviledged children. The best part is dropping off the donations and seeing all the volunteers working so hard, and how happy they are to be helping.

  9. Love Heifer.org! I get my nephew a share of a llama or some bunnies every year for his birthday, he loves it. On another blog some people got all huffy about it, thinking that the animals are all killed for food. Feh.

    (Obviously they’ve never tried to eat a llama. ~ Jenny)

  10. I sent some bees. And yet, it seems so wrong. I would not want someone to send me bees. But if they think it will be good… who am I to question.

  11. Can you donate bees to small children? A good way to find out if they’re allergic, right? “Oh, I see your head is swelling up so bad that your nose is pushed inside your cheeks… well now you know to avoid bees in the future, right? You should also probably avoid opening any future letters from Jenny Lawson.”

  12. Thank you for the llama! And thank you for all your accidental goodness.

    I hope I am quietly, privately (from my hermitude) doing what good I can.

  13. I donated during the frenzy of 2010 and I have to say, it was the best Christmas EVER for us, just knowing that we helped out. So now, my three youngins love to hit up the giving trees at our local mall and pass it forward to those less fortunate. Thanks Jenny, you not only inspired me, you also inspired the next generation.

  14. YOU are a rockstar. Donated to Project Night Night, and planning to give EVERYONE bees. I love bees.

  15. I am sharing the Night Night Project link, for my friends. And hopefully will have enough to do one myself!

  16. My mom is the worst person to shop for. She’s getting a cow and sending a kid some great dreams. Merry f*cking Christmas!

    That will teach her to stop buying ALL THE THINGS throughout the year she wants 😉

  17. Not giving a virtual bitchslap to a relative is about as nice as I’m getting right now… somehow I think that it doesn’t qualify me for a card though.

    I love that you do this and hope that I can afford to give another sheep this year.

  18. This year my 6 year old was counting the money in his piggy bank (6 years worth of loose change more or less) and when he was done he asked me what he could do with it. I told him it was his and he could do what he wanted. He got thoughtful and then got all excited and asked if he could take an extra tag off the giving tree at church this year and use his own money for it. Well it turned out that since we were slackers and went to the late Mass on Sunday there were only a handful of tags left on the tree, so the kid was super sad because we didn’t even manage to get our one tag per family member we normally try to do. So I think I’ll ask him if he’d like to donate to project Night Night instead I think that will make him a happy little kiddo again.

  19. You can donate a camel! A camel! I’m a little fasicerrIfied by camels (that means I’m both fascinated and terrified by them). If I was wealthy, I would donate all the camels!

  20. My kids and I are donating their outgrown and gently used toys and books this year to share with people who don’t have them. We will also be purchasing a few to donate, as well. They’re 3 and 2 and I”m hoping to start a giving tradition with them.

  21. I am getting several children off the angle tree at our local store. Also instead of getting birthday /christmas presents (Christmas babies represent) I asked my friends and family to donate to my favorite charities.

  22. I will continue my efforts to get some space heaters, (hand/fin) warmers, blankets and tiny apartment buildings for the Emperor Penguins so film makers stop filming them freezing to death in the Arctic. That ain’t cool. Teach them to make some motherfucking fire, people!

  23. We will definitely donate to Project Night Night. We also donate to charity: water. And this year we donated our pre lit Christmas tree and old ornaments to a family with a 4 year old and a 6 year old who had never, ever had a Christmas tree. Which, when I heard about it, almost broke my heart! We also bought a second Christmas tree for a family that needs one.

    I love this time of year because it always gets me in the spirit when I can help other people 🙂 Better than getting some useless item that will just sit around gathering dust!

  24. Love it! Heifer international is one of my favorite charities. I’m gonna split mine this year between you and Patrick Rothfuss’ Worldbuildiers charity, which also does great things for Heifers…or Heifer Int. Oh you know what I mean!

  25. I exploded my son’s room to find all of the toys that he no longer plays with, cleaned them, reassembled them, replaced their batteries, and sent them to a local church that donates them to a local trailer park where kids normally wouldn’t have a nice Christmas. I’ve always been a control freak about keeping all of my kids’ toys intact (tiny pieces and all), so I was able to donate 12 really nice things. After that, I had to reassemble my son’s room. It still looks pretty tacky.

  26. I cleaned my grandmothers place 🙂 and I am sending the lady bugs that a commenter mentioned to my ex

  27. I want a James Garfield card so badly, so I came down here to the comments section to tell you about something nice I’m doing for others this season. Turns out, I’m not doing anything nice for others. Between raising the kiddo and battling my depression/food addiction, my life has become completely self-centered.

    Thank you so much for this post. Now that I am out of the worst of my issues, it’s time to start giving back to those who are still battling their own issues, whatever they may be. I really needed that reminder, and I can’t tell you how appreciative I am that I got it before all the holidays are over. I missed out on Thanksgiving and Hanukkah, but there’s still Christmas, New Years, Boxing Day, and Kwanza!

  28. I lost my job a few months ago and so money is very tight right now, otherwise I would totally donate. My good dead for this Christmas is going to be that I’m not going to send any voodoo curses out this year. I do love http://www.pinstruck.com/ but I’m not even going to curse the people who fired me. Now that is motherfucking festive. I would dearly love a James Garfield card to go with my festiveness.

  29. This year I supported both my parents through cancer, month long stays in the hospital, brain abnormalities, dehydration, and almost bleeding out after biopsies. And I haven’t killed either of them yet. If you knew them you’d think I was a goddamn saint. A card from you would make my YEAR!

  30. I left my husband then I forgave him and went back home. That’s nice, right? But really…Awesome fundraiser. Thanks for using your power for good instead of eve-ill. 🙂 Kids shouldn’t be homeless. That’s terrible.

  31. Thanks for lifting my spirits, nice to know people are doing nice stuff for others, is James giving out blessings?

  32. I just bought some books for a teacher that needed some for her classroom!

    I’d love to have a James Garfield card!

  33. Probably won’t be able to donate money this year.
    I have, however been donating my time helping some friends find resources to help them through their everyday lives, as well as the holiday season. It is difficult to get assistance in many areas, because SO many people need help.

  34. I think it’s awesome what you have been able to do for Project Night Night! I work with a group called HANK, Helping Abused and Neglected Kids, a program that gives every child who enters the foster care system in Hondo, Kerrville, Uvalde (and several other towns) in Texas, a set of bedding and a handmade quilt, because when you enter foster care, you leave with the clothes on your back and nothing else, and sometimes foster families make the kids leave blankets, toys, and pillows, for their next foster kid. With the younger ones, they give them a stuffed animal, along with their bedding, and the older ones get text books and sporting equipment if they played. I am a crazy quilter, I just started last January, and managed to get them 6 quilts, and 30 pillowcases made by my Cub Scout boys.

  35. The family decided not to give each other gifts this year because we are sick of storing stuff. I’ll pass this around to them so we have an alternative that helps people who would LOVE to have the problem of storing stuff.

    Thanks for the reminder and the links Jenny. You’re a good egg.

  36. I don’t know if this would be categorized as selfish or unselfish, but two years ago I decided to sell everything and move to Europe to live in France for a while, following a dream, and this seems to be a point of inspiration to some people who know me and what I’m doing, whether they decide to completely change their lives or not. So me having a good time living abroad is, I am deciding as of this moment, a philanthropic endeavor. Therefore it counts as doing nice things for other people.

    Also noted: the fact that you commented favorably on a random post featuring homemade pizza on my blog several years ago remains one of the highlights of my internet life. Merry happy 2014.

  37. I know this “GivingTuesday” thing is made up and all, but I do love that you do this every year. And if Pope Francis can totally sneak out of his house in the middle of the night to give out money to poor people, it just goes to show there’s hope for all of us.

  38. These all sound like wonderful ideas.I’m going to spend my last bit of money on Project Night Night. ;0) I’ll be sure to fb/tweet this out to try to get my friends and family to donate too. Thanks for sharing this with everyone-you’re a saint all on your own!

  39. I gave some goods to the local food bank at the supermarket last week, cause I want to support my local community here in the UK.

  40. I’m getting bees for Christmas this year. For real. They’re not for disadvantaged children, though, they’re for my backyard. And I don’t get to actually have them till March. So far the only nice thing I’ve done for the holidays is not murder anyone. It doesn’t sound like much, but if you knew my friends and family you’d want to give me a cookie.

  41. I drink coffee so that the people around me don’t have to die, and so that I don’t have to become intimately acquainted with the prison system of whatever state I’d finally be tracked down in.
    That probably doesn’t count as doing something nice, but it is what I’ve got.

  42. I bring dinner daily to my elderly neighbor despite her telling me, “your children are satan’s soldiers,” and “your soul is dead like that tree in your yard.” Truthfully, bring her food because of the insults. She’s one creative old bitch. I’m totally saving them up for the day I turn old and wrinkly and can say whatever the fuck I want. I’d LOVE to send her a bag of bees with a little not that says, “don’t insult my tree, bitch!”

  43. I am knitting a hat for a friend of my son in grad school. He is from Somalia and Seattle, both of which are much warmer than Ann Arbor. (My husband and two sons are way too warm-blooded to ever need handknits, more’s the pity.)

  44. We have a backpack program at my high school for our homeless students who won’t have anything to eat outside of school. We put together easy-to-fix meals that carry them through the weekends and holidays so they have food in their bellies. We’re also collecting clothing, canned goods for our local food pantries, and newspaper and blankets for a local animal shelter. Somehow, being a part of all this with my students warms my blackened and shriveled little heart.

  45. A wonderful idea.
    I think I will go donate a box and send the donation-thankyou to my mother. She knitted preemie hats for the hospital NICU for decades until arthritis kicked in. I’m fumble-fingered so have only managed one hat so far and I think this would make her smile.

    Rescue organizations also will get what help we can send, because Mother Earth has been one mean mother in 2013. (From Oklahoma and Illinois to the Phillipines and beyond…would you believe tornados in Italy&France this year?)

  46. I’m hosting the Christmas party for those who don’t have anyone to spend the holidays with – people who’s families live too far, or who don’t have any family left, etc. No one should be alone during the holidays.

  47. I donated to Heifer a couple years ago on behalf of an exboyfriend (we had a running joke about a goat… don’t ask) and I’m STILL getting snail mail solicitations from them!! I don’t think he (the ex) really “got it” but I thought it was HI-LAR-IOUS!!!

  48. This will be the first year we will not be able to give to others as much as I would like. My husband lost his job on Nov. 1st and I still have to find a way to make sure Santa visits our kids. I also had to stop taking my meds because we can’t afford it anymore and oh my word that has sucked big time. No more sleep and no more help with anxiety. I keep reminding myself though that we are still doing better than many others. Because of that I will at least donate as much as I can to our local food bank and I will share your pages to try to get others to help and donate to those causes. Coming to your page brings at least one smile to my face everyday so thank you for that.

  49. Thanks for the llama, Jenny!

    I shall visit Project Night Night. Meanwhile, today at work, I’m waving over-enthusiastically at everyone I see in the halls. They either laugh or wave back like a maniac. It’s the little things.

  50. We adopted 22 teenagers this year…..not really adopted, that would be crazy because we live in a two bedroom condo. And who wants 22 teenagers around at once? Anyway we are buying them all Christmas gifts since no one else wanted them.
    And we bought a cow. Again not for the condo, but for a family in Ethiopia.
    Merry Christmas, and thanks for all you do!

  51. Omg..please…I would actually hang my Christmas cards if this one arrived! lol

    You are a thoughtful and kind person..using your powers for good! As always, a fab post.

  52. What I’m doing for other people this year is staying home as much as possible. I’m reducing gridlock, eliminating air pollution, and preventing myself from slowing down some really important person who wants to buy useless gifts for their really important friends at Wal-Mart.

    Recognizing that the holidays are naughty and send my depression/anxiety into hyperdrive is the greatest gift of all. I can’t afford therapy, even with health insurance, so hibernation is the most logical alternative.

    You’re welcome.

  53. Some of these comments are *almost* as good as this post. Almost. It is absolutely fabulous what you are doing. Thanks for the llama, it was tasty. My one thing I do is volunteer for CASA. Go look it up, people. It is a great cause. Plus, it will be the only time I sit in a courtroom and not be judged. Happy Holimas! That’s my new word which my computer is underlining. It’s a word!

  54. I love you- really a lot.
    To make it less creepy, my wife loves you, too..
    Wait- did I just make it more skeezy?
    Um.
    My dog flips out when I giggle reading your blog.
    How about that?

  55. The “anonymous coward” moniker is necessary so that in the event that any of my work people somehow reads this, they won’t know I’m talking about them. But my holiday efforts this year include trying to ensure that I don’t have to lay off any staff in January. Even though, really, nothing says holiday goodness like “Congrats! You’ve been a great employee, but your position has been eliminated and you’re the one that we’re turning out into the literal freezing cold,” I have managed to engineer a solution where no one needs to freeze to death in a refrigerator box. So yeah, I’m feeling pretty smug and deserving of awesome holiday cards to showcase my efforts. I’ll even paste it on my office door.

  56. We donate to the local food pantry and created a relief pack that our church sends to help disaster relief around the world.
    I was a part of the original James Garfield miracle and it was one of my favorite donations! Keep doing what you do!

  57. This year instead of getting gifts I convinced my family to donate to Fisher House. It’s like Ronald McDonald House but for military members and their families. My son and I had to stay there for 6 weeks this year due to a growth on his leg. Of it weren’t for them my husband and I would be in a massive amount of debt. So this year the Christmas funds are going to them so they can continue to help our service members and their families during times of medical need.

  58. I am making all of our Christmas gifts this year. Doing that will help me be able to donate. Although I haven’t figured out where yet so maybe I’ll go with oxen or something. Thanks for the inspiration to be better.

  59. As I have for the last eight years, I am buying gifts for two seniors at a state run retirement home. My work does this every year. The seniors there have no one and my work will make sure that every person in the home has gifts. We also collect all types of personal grooming aids, little treats such as cookies and candies, DVD’s, books, magazines, etc. All of the seniors ask for such simple items, mostly clothing, and maybe one personal luxury item like lip stick or a hair dryer. It makes me feel so good and so sad at the same time. Bless you for all that you do and thank you for the llama and links.

  60. Now that my kids have learned the value of a dollar, they’re much happier getting dollars as presents. Now I only have to track down one thing for any gift-giving occasion for them.

    Because all my meager supply of dollars goes to my kids, we donate to others by volunteering at the Super Feast. You get to help others, and you also get a free meal. Win / Win!

  61. Awesome! I started giving to Heifer for Christmas a few years ago rather than giving a bunch of crap to people they really don’t need. Bunnies, pigs, chicks, etc., much more useful. This year I’m buying pigs, because, bacon. I think the developing world could use more of that. Love what you do, and what you right!

  62. I got to be the very first to add a gift for a little girl from the gifting tree at our local postal center to the collection box 🙂 Will definitely share this post too 🙂 (And, if donations are still happening when I get my first paycheck from my new job (2 wks 🙂 ), I’m in!

  63. My favorite things about Christmas are Skyping with my kids on Christmas morning and taking screenshots to blackmail them with later, and giving to various people/charities (including Project Night Night). This year I’m also going to help my nephew buy beds for his kids so they don’t have to sleep on the floor when they’re at his place. It feels kind of braggy to type that out, but I think when people talk about giving, it inspires others to give more. You’ve definitely inspired me to give! Merry Chrishanukkwanzaa!

  64. I will be getting pregnant in about two weeks to help another family realize their dream of having kids. ( gestational surrogate) does that count??? ( shamelessly using my surrogacy in the hopes of getting a postcard from Jenny. Worth it)

  65. You making me laugh is worth $20…and an oxen…and a bee-sting in the ass of an oxen…

  66. Did you know if you like someone you can buy bunnies for a family in someone else’s name at Heifer. I know this because I bought bunnies and ducks for some family last Christmas. I think bunnies will balance out the bees and llamas (they make for really bad house guests, even worse than pesky in-laws). Thanks for the giving reminder about Project Night Night too.

    Hope no one mails you any angry bees.

  67. I’m helping running a toy/gift card drive for local tornado victims. And since we seem to be having way to many people doing just that in our area (I mean really what kind of awesome problem is that to have!) I’m am also doing a monetary drive for the local kids served by Department of Children and Family Services. So many people are focusing on disaster relief they seem to be forgetting the kids who always need help every year, so trying to take care of them to so they don’t get left out. Almost forgot a one day food drive in 2 weeks for the local food pantry (give to your local food pantry they are all hurting with SNAP cuts).
    I don’t need a card, or a pat on the back. I need people who have the means, and I certainly understand not everyone does, to donate a toy, gift card, or some non-perishables (especially protein they never have enough) to one of these types of drives. We can all make a difference if we try!

  68. My favorite things about Christmas are Skyping with my kids on Christmas morning and taking screenshots to blackmail them with later, and giving to various people/charities. This year I’m also going to help my nephew buy beds for his kids so they don’t have to sleep on the floor when they’re at his place. It sounds kind of braggy to type that out, but I think when people talk about giving, it inspires others to give more. You’ve definitely inspired me! Merry Chrishanukkwanzaa!

  69. Thanks so much for the llama! I’ll definitely be donating to Heifer, as I love the factuality that an entire family can be helped by literally one goat – just amazing. Happy Christmas, Happy Kwanza, and Happy Belated Hanukkah!

  70. I would like a card for a friend of mine. Last week we lost our home in a fire. My friend Stacey organized fundraising to help us and rounded up online friends and strangers to get the word out. She’s helped me keep my sanity through all this. She’s a big fan of yours and introduce d me to your work, and she deserves a card.

  71. Today I left exact change in the vending machine for a candy bar. I figure aim paying it forward in a small way. It’s the little things, right. Like live bees!

  72. so many unopened toys stuffed in the closets… HELLO Toys for TOTS! Good stuff you’re doing over here… all in the name of ‘stuffed’ animals. 🙂

  73. SO COOL, Jenny! You even make philanthropy deliciously, hilariously twisted.

    And I would be happy to give you Yiddish lessons. My grandmother (who I actually heard say “Fuck” once, on purpose – her accent made lots of words SOUND like “fuck”- and it is one of my bestest memories EVER) used to have a mile long curse that translates to “May he be infested with pubic lice and cursed with arms too short to scratch”. We are a dignified people. 🙂

    Happy Holidays!!

  74. I LOVE James Garfield cards. I drove 5 hours to adopt homeless ferrets for my kids for x-mas, and I can’t wait to send angry bees to my mother’s best friend, she’s obsessed with bee epidemics in the world. I also plan to buy presents for kids in foster care. I like thinking about and doing good things more than talking about them, so please send me James Garfield cards, or at least make them available to buy in the store. Thanks

  75. Consider it done, my dear. Just donated, let’s blow the doors of the 750 from last year!!

  76. Almost forgot; my department (5 people) are also adopting a family for Christmas. This is a big effort put together mainly by one of our local broadcast stations.

  77. My sister and I go to the teen shelter at Jonathon’s place and spend the day color, cutting and styling their hair. It has been the first professional haircut for many of them. Blessings to you the bloggess!

  78. Last year was so terrible for us – my boss had just closed her business and I had zero dollars…couldn’t even buy my own kids any gifts. I figured keeping the heat on and the roof over our heads would have to be gift enough. This year is a teeny bit better, and I’d much rather squeeze out $20 to donate to this cause instead of buying half an outfit for a 6month old neice who won’t even know the difference. Plus also, my sister’s kids are way too spoiled anyways. Thanks Jenny – you make it easier for us to do the right thing. 🙂 ?

  79. I got a new vehicle this past fall and heard a cousin of mine, who is a single mom, needed a car to get around for work so I gave her my old car free of charge. It saved my other cousin from taking a loan out to help her sister ( first cousin mentioned) get a car so I pretty much killed two birds with one good deed.

    I’d like to say I gave her a kick ass car but it was an Aztek. So I’m not sure if this really counts as a good deed or a horrible joke disguised as one. Either way she was super happy to have wheels again.

  80. Our family always picks an Angel Tree child to help. This year, we got a little boy who loves trains. And because my nephew also loves trains, we might have gone a little overboard. Choo-choo, motherfucker.

    And for mom’s birthday Dec. 31, I’m giving her a card from the Arbor Day foundation telling her a tree has been planted in her name… aaaand I’ve just realized the card was made from dead trees, so that probably defeats the purpose….

  81. Even though my husband was being a total asshole this morning, I went ahead and ordered him a new phone for Christmas. That’s nice, right?
    I plan on donating to the project on Friday 🙂

  82. I have given to Heifer for years, I love the idea of helping and them paying it forward. Great charity. I am giving to Meals on Wheels since their funding has been cut so badly. I know my beloved grandpa who passed away this year looked forward to his daily visit from them. I’ll also buy a Project Night bag. Thanks for doing this Jenny!

  83. I cooked for 18 hours this year, raising funds for Random Acts, the charity funded by Supernatural actor Misha Collins.

    I live for James Garfield in festive attire.

  84. I suck at being nice to people. I read about great charities doing great things, and then I read about other great stuff, and I’m already spending insane money this season and all I can do is just hide under my bed.

    Still.

    I’ve given animals through Heifer before. My gramma at least loves it. And I’ve been looking for a new charity that helps poor kids, in an effort to prevent poor adults. Project Night Night sounds awesome, and there’s also a local group that helps foster kids transition as they age out. Time to get on that one…

  85. My oldest (eldest? shit, let’s just go with first-born) daughter is going to Dominica in January with other students from her college so I literally just cleaned out my youngest daughter’s shoe collection to send to the kids there. Some of the shoes still had tags on them which was embarrassing but what can I say, Tessie Toodles is the Imelda Marcos of her generation and bonus, since she is in a wheelchair, the shoes never get dirty. It’s a win-win really.

  86. I’m getting my boyfriend fancy-pants yoga shorts for Christmas, because apparently if you’re a guy your junk gets all caught up in regular shorts while doing yoga. So you need special yoga shorts with a junk pouch or something. That’s my nice thing I’m doing.

  87. Well the Pope better have his special saint-making trousers on, because I reckon I’m practically there. Clearing out my bookshelves I figured I couldn’t be arsed to type all their ISBNs in to Amazon to see what they’d fetch second hand, so I gave them to a local charity shop. Today I got a really lovely hand-written letter saying they’d already sold have of them and raised over £450 for a heart charity.

    So can I be a saint please – even if I was at the end of the day just being bloody lazy?

  88. I’m buying a ham for the homeless. Well technically for a womans shelter for Christmas dinner.

  89. I need more animals who are stuffed. It is so much easier to decorate them than it is my cat. She refuses to wear the hat, but she is in love with the vest. I can’t get her out of it.

    Then I am reminded of Scrooged.
    Props man: I can’t get the antlers glued to this little guy. We tried Crazy Glue, but it don’t work. Frank Cross: Did you try staples?

    Sharing your cause on my fb today. 🙂 Yay doing good things.

    *Just don’t use staples.

  90. I have an 11 year old niece. Her bff has 2 siblings and lives with her single mom. Mom works hard but doesn’t make much money. The bff goes over to my sister’s house and is in awe of how much food is available to eat. So this year- I am going to buy presents for bff and sibs/mom and pick up some groceries for them. I don’t know where they live, so I am making my sister drop it off (anonymously) when the mom is at work.

    My sister is the only one who knows about this-and I don’t plan on telling anyone else, but I’ll tell you guys because none of you know me in real life.

    (Also, I am a single mom with one child; I don’t have a lot but I don’t have to worry about having enough food for my kid to eat.)

  91. I am so worn out this year all I can think of for doing something nice is not strangling the teachers at my son’s middle school who cannot understand the meaning of “504-required accommodations” for someone with a new, severe and now chronic health issue who missed a month of school and continues to have daily bouts of moderate to severe pain, and think it means “we’ll give you until next week to make up all of that work and plus you have to do all the new work we are assigning oh BTW there is no textbook it’s all stuff we discussed in class good luck.” MAYBE. Of course, if I donate to your projects I don’t have to stick with this something nice, right?

  92. Paying to fly my daughter’s friend’s dog from western state to Ky because her parents lost their apartment and her dad took her dog to the animal shelter without telling her.

  93. This year I’m making an advent-calendar like box for my best friend and her sister that lost their mom this summer to Pancreatic Cancer. They always celebrated the full moon, so I’ve bought a box and I’m going to put 12 personal gifts in each of them.. So they each have something to look forward to on the night of the full moon to open and won’t just be missing their amazing mom.

    Thank you again for all that you do for kids, bees, and everyone else. 🙂

  94. Every year my mother gets together with her work and sponsors a Santa for seniors, where they buy things for elderly. She used to adopt children for the holidays who were in foster care, and buy them bunches of things they wanted and needed. We usually adopt soldiers for thanksgiving, this year we were unable to. And we always donate whatever extra we have to several local organizations.
    I will be donating to this cause on Friday when i have the funds..

  95. Heifer is wonderful, we’ve been giving bees (and pigs, and llamas and trees) for 3 or 4 years now. We try to match the donation to the person 😉

  96. I once saw a giant pink llama in a Safeway parking lot. It turned out my medication needed tweaking.

  97. We’re sending a ton of stuff to Operation Ward 57 which supports wounded warriors, their families and care givers by providing items that assist in recovery, maintenance & morale in Walter Reed Army Medical Center. They are wanting small home goods for the holidays for those who can’t spend the holidays with their families back home because they are stuck in the hospital. You can also adopt a wounded warrior and his family to help them with the holidays. They are doing a lot of good for the families at Walter Reed and we’re proud to be helping those that sacrifice themselves for our freedom. http://www.operationward57.org/

  98. Count another one for Night Night. Having a spawnling of my own, I can’t even imagine him not having a blanket or cuddle monster. *scary*

    Thanks for using your voice for amazing things!

  99. I’m too cheap/broke to donate money, but I’ve been volunteering with Girls on The Run, an awesome organization that teaches girls in grades 3-8 about self esteem, body image, bullying, nutrition, and excercise. That’s right. My time is *precious*. You’re welcome, world.

  100. I can’t afford to donate, but I have been volunteering at various safe nights around my city, and creating a few special clay turtles for the children in the program. I would love one of those cards but I think it could bring a smile to someone in need of one, rather than someone as fortunate as I am.

  101. Thanks for the llama! It amazes me how you always get the right size! I would love to receive a James Garfield Christmas card. Being that we are very very broke until February, I will share this post and ask people to donate. You are my Holiday Miracle, Jen!

  102. My honey and I bought little girl beds and dolls for a family who we found through Blue Santa. It was so amazing, we picked another family and got to buy a ton of toy dinosaurs. 🙂

  103. YEAH BABY! WHO JUST BOUGHT SOME BEES? BOOM! That’s right, I did. Happy mf holidays!

    Seriously though…Jenny – you are great. Thank you for mobilizing all these people for good. You, my friend-I’ve-never-met are a MOBILIZER!!! <3

  104. Sadly, I recently lost my job so our donations this year will consist of me getting gently used stuff to tornado victims in Washington, IL. I also have a foster puppy right now that we had to bottle feed, so I’m sure he is appreciative (when he is not peeing on something in the house…).

    Happy Merry Christmahanakwanzika everyone!

  105. My work chooses a charitable organization every year in which all the employees can donate for the Holiday outreach program. This year is a little special because now it’s personal. One of our employees has family that was affected by Typhoon Haiyan in the Philippines. We’re all encouraged to give a little more to help her parents rebuild their home. I can’t wait to help them out!

  106. This is the fourth year of my husband and I running a program to get Christmas presents for senior citizens who otherwise wouldn’t get one (for example if they have no family, are underpriviledged or have no family near them to help. Seniors are often a forgotten group at Christmas but their eyes light up just as brightly as a child’s when they open their Christmas presents and realize someone has thought of them. Check out your local Be A Santa for a Senior program, or, if one isn’t available in your area, think about doing what we did and start one up on your own by contacting local senior’s homes. Happy holidays! Thank you Jenny for making all our holidays brighter.

  107. I’ll be donating to Project Night Night and might donate bees instead of gifts- because I know how awesome bees are and am officially addicted to the honey from our hives! The bee in the envelope is definitely doable since we have some dead ones lying around. (They’re dead from natural causes, duh we don’t kill our own bees!)

  108. Thanks for the link. I’ll donate and pass along. This year I purchased gifts for 5 local kids in foster care. I hope they enjoy Christmas morning as much as I did as a kid.

    ps. i totally want a llama. in pajamas.

  109. I donated to Project Night Night last year in my Dad’s name. He passed away in Jan of 2012 and was an advocate of education. When he was still physically able, he would go to the schools in my home town and read with kids in some of the less affluent schools. He would bribe them with shiny coins 🙂

    I also remember one time when he was in his early 70s when he almost tangled with a parent. The parents had to sign for library cards and one young boy had a parent who wouldn’t sign because he didn’t want to accept any financial responsibility if the book was lost. The father used some colorful language to describe his ‘unresponsible son’. My dad said ‘Give me the GodDamnSonOfaBitch form (yes, that always one word as I grew up) I will sign the thing because EVERY GUY SHOULD HAVE A LIBRARY CARD’.

    I miss my dad and will continue to donate this year.

    Thank you Jenny

  110. I know it doesn’t seem like much, but during the months of November and December, my husband & I tip our waiters and waitresses really well. We eat out about once or twice a week. We always go to the same 5 or 6 restaraunts, small town, family owned places. They have great young people that work at all of them and we’ve gotten to know a little more about each of them over the past few years. So last year we decided to tip them $20 when we go. (Now they kinds of fight over us.) But we know that every little bit helps. I was a waitress when I was in college and my sister has always worked in restaraunts. So I feel good giving them a bright spot in their work day.

  111. I LOVE Heifer! Great present for so many, especially for those who really have all they need. That way they help others too. And who doesn’t like a bunch of chicks or bunnies? My mother is getting Xmas from Heifer.

    I also buy books through Better World Books because they donate to libraries or literacy projects for EVERY book sold.

  112. Thanks for the reminder to donate! I just used your link to donate to Project Night Night. Hooray for The Bloggess Army! Together we’ll do great things this holiday season.

  113. Thank you for reminding me to get the in-law’s gift ordered. I’m glad the bees are going to a good home (versus the in-laws…if going to them…I would’ve had to request the box be shaken hard before they open them…but then the bees would die and that would just be sad….).

    Love the Heiffer International folks.

  114. I seriously love you and am going to give you first corgi naming rights. I’m giving rabbits from HI to my coworkers instead of Christmas gifts. We work in an international student office, so it’s that or try to find some fair trade shit, which is also awesome, but I’m lazy. So “Merry Festivus, I gave people bunnies for you!” it is this year. And I shall ask that one of them be named James Garfield.

  115. Heifer is an awesome organization. We’ve done that for Christmas before and for funeral memorials-in-lieu-of-flowers for people. And this weekend, we took our eight year old shopping for the kids we picked from the foster care tree’s presents. But maybe, just, maybe (and I say this with love) James Garfield the Boar should stick to Christmas/Kwanzaa and leave Hannukah alone, what with the not being kosher and all. Maybe Juanita could perform a Hannukah miracle. With her apron, I can see her whipping up a tasty batch of mother-fuckin’ latkes for the masses.

  116. I cannot afford to donate this year – sadly – but I did share the info on my FB so that all 600 something of my friends will see it and hopefully someone will send some money. Just to throw in some brownie points in the hopes of receiving one of your awesome cards, I have also been shopping and wrapping gifts for kids with our local police dept for their Blue Santa program. So, even though I am dirt poor right now, I am donating my time. 🙂
    Happy Holidays!

  117. Frakking awesome!
    Our house recently caught on fire (only a winner like me would have it catch fire on..my birthday)
    but i’ve been working on various projects for others – including: donating & volunteering for a veteran’s thanksgiving (fed over 200!); donated over $800 to FIV positive kitties & homeless Detroit doggies; $300 to a homeless woman & her doggies on the street; target bags full of food, dog food & grooming stuff for a homeless guy w his dog i saw rollin’ down the street; plus supporting my kick ass friend who is recently diagnosed w Lou Gehrig’s disease on her quest to kick as much marathon ASS as possible before that shitty disease comes full circle; and helping out our friend with foods since his SNAP got reduced to like $14 a month. (Who can live on $14 a month???) However, I’m super jealous that i didn’t donate BEEEEEES! It’s the gift that keeps on giving! Best passive agressive gift ever!
    Me: Hey buddy, I got you a gift!
    Jerk: Really?
    Me: Yeah! Here! Happy Holidays n’ shit!
    them: ahhhhh! I’m covered in beeeeees.
    Me: Yippee ki yeah mother frakker….
    (and i would dress in full reindeer gear for this & carry my taxidermied duck in a kilt, Jensen Quackles)

  118. Can you imagine teaming up with Amazon to deliver oxen via their new drones? It would never be safe to walk outside again.

  119. Sending some bees out there in the world in memory of my dad, who was an avid gardener (72 tomato plants for 3 people??? Seriously, Daddy, I couldn’t stand even to look at a tomato for years after that summer), and a Night Night package in memory of my mom, who gave the world’s best good night hugs.

    My kiddo’s Cub Scout pack is organizing a coat drive for local charities, and I’m the designated (coat) driver.

  120. Shitload of Oxen might be a good name for a punk rock band.

    Jenny, you inspire me. For the third year in a row, my playgroup adopted a local family without many resources. We shower the kiddos (and the parents) with as much from their Christmas lists as we can. This year, turns out our family is Peruvian (I cannot make this shit up). I pretty much HAVE to give them a llama now. They’ll totally get it. Right?

  121. Donated $10 to the angel tree. 😉 And we may try to pick a family to take dinner to. We’re much better off this year than last, and with all the kindness we got last year, we have to pass it on. 😉 Merry Christmas

  122. My daughter, who is 4 adopted a needy (couldn’t spell under priviliged…see) child and bought a stocking and gifts for her. I was so proud of her and shocked that she understood what she was doing and that it was important. She didn’t even ask to keep any of the gifts, which were pretty cool. I guess I’ve done something right…although I’m still selfish! 🙂

  123. I’m totally donating. But more than that, I want a James Garfield card soooo super duper bad. That’s pretty much entirely why I’m commenting. I’m selfish like that. And pathetic.

  124. Seriously, EVERY year my husband donates bees! I’ve tried talking him into other animals but he refuses. He thinks everyone should donate all the bees. This post cracked me up!

  125. As a grad student, I don’t have much money, but I try to donate to at least one charity every Christmas. This year Project Night Night will be the one. Thanks for spreading the word!

  126. We donated shoeboxes for Operation Christmas Child and will donate some new toys to Toys for Tots.

  127. Plus it’s Giving Tuesday!! Excellent timing, Jenny! I will be donating to Heifer Int’l as it has long been one of my favorite charities. Thanks for spreading love!!

  128. I’d never heard of Heifer before (because I’m usually the last person to know about anything), but I just donated to them and Project Night Night.

    Last year, the one Christmas card I sent was one you made where an elf was stabbing a couch. I’ll admit, I had a slight hope of never having to send another card for a while, but as it turned out, they liked it. So this year, I’m going to send a James Garfield card to them even if I don’t win it randomly.

  129. We have dear friends that just can’t seem to get a break. They are both working full time jobs but are getting just barely above minimum wage and can’t get their bills paid. So several families are pooling resources to get presents for their girls as well as helping to pay off some bills and repair their car.

  130. Dear everyone in the comments who said they couldn’t afford to donate: I just donated a chicken to Heifer for each one of you. Thanks for making me believe in Christmas again. Eggs for everyone!

  131. Donated. I couldn’t afford to the last two years so this year I can finally make up for it. A special thanks to everyone who donated to Toys for Tots last year. It helped me give my kids presents. You don’t know how much that meant.

  132. I’ve been using my couponing skills to.get toiletries and donating them to a local hospital hospitality house, as they helped me and my family so much, I wanted to pay it forward. I love what you are doing here.

  133. I have organized our office to Adopt-A-Family this holiday season. We will be finding out this week who our family is and we have already started collecting food and gifts to bring to them in time for Christmas. You are amazing and thank you for the llama!!!

  134. In the year of many miracles I was a recipient of 2 gift cards which I used to help a dear friend give her two kids a christmas. The next year I donated to Project Night Night, I have seen firsthand how losing everything can effect people, not just children. I rarely have the money to spare as we live on less than $30,000 a year, thank you for showing those of us that don’t think we can make a difference, how to do just that. I think this year I might buy bees in the name of friend. It’s a win win though, this friend pissed me off and hurt me so badly that I had a breakdown but he terrified of BEES. I’ll figure out just how to tell him that I bought him bees.

  135. Hubby and I are going to do something from Project Heifer for our Christmas presents to each other this year. We haven’t quite decided on which animal(s), but it’s definitely what we’re going to be doing. I love Project Heifer! My sister gave me ducks last year. 🙂

  136. I’m totally donating a bag of bees in the name of my shithead ex-boyfriend! This is gonna make my whole holiday season! 😀

  137. is it smug to say that i don’t feel right telling you what i’m doing for other people? i feel like what i do for charity is my own private thing.

  138. You’re a truly kick ass person! I’ve been looking for charities to donate to for the holidays and these just made top of my list!!! Thank you….

  139. I got a copy of your book to give to my best and oldest friend. Additionally, I give little care packages to homeless folks in and around Seattle. (Not just for the holiday season… they need it year-round).

    Cheers!
    Jen

  140. Good deeds I’m doing? Well, I’ve passed along your book to a co-worker, I’m working on volunteering through my company for a few holiday events for the homeless, and resisting the urge to spend my rent and food money on christmas presents after having to spend my christmas money on MAJOR car repairs, even though it is depressing that I can’t give gifts this year to anyone, let alone my child. 🙁 But, I have a home, and food, and that’s what matters more than gifts.

  141. I had one of my Girl Scout troops bake pies for the homeless shelter this year for their Thanksgiving meal. The kids had a ball, and the folks at the shelter were all full of awe. And AWWWWW…..

  142. Been a real shit-tastic day. But then I read this and knew I needed to quit my bellyaching. So, I sent a Flock of Hope. I had a great breakfast burrito this morning and I hope some kids out there can enjoy some eggs for breakfast soon, also. (However, without salsa I’m not sure if there is a point. I digress…) And I sent it in honor of the man I love, who also happens to live with someone else. Maybe she’ll find the card and start threatening me again. That was fun.

    Regardless, out of our petty, stupid first world problems, someone should benefit. I pray this flock truly does bring hope to some needy people. And I hope the flock shits on the shitty people.

    Thank you, Bloggess. You rock

  143. Thank you for this — giving bees is my new favorite thing EVER! All of my nieces and nephew are going to get bees this year! Bees for everyone!

  144. I organize “Adopt a Family” at my office and we provide Christmas for a family that otherwise wouldn’t be able to afford presents. It’s run through the Salvation Army.

    My favorite day of the year is when I go to drop off the presents. It’s an entire gymnasium just filled with Christmases for families. Best feeling ever.

  145. I passed along the angry bee link to my husband. We’ve thought of raising bees but we don’t have the amount of yard that they need, so it would be amazing to help someone else be able to raise bees. We always donate to Childs Play (giving toys / video games to kids in the hospital) at Christmas. NERDS UNITE!

  146. I like to buy the drinks of whoever is behind me in the drive thru at Starbucks. Someone did it for me once. I was having such a bad day that it completely restored my faith in humanity–I hope I can do the same for someone else.

  147. P.S. – If you might consider selling the James Garfield holiday card in your shop, that would be worth all the awesomes.

    Just sayin’ 🙂

  148. I just went through all of my daughters toys, and donated the ones she doesn’t play with any longer to charity. The get two trash bags full. (not full of trash, just nice toys)

  149. Jenny, you are awesome! I am trying to do some special things for those I love this year

  150. We are Santa for 2 disadvantaged kids this year. It’s a hometown charity. We went a little overboard on gifts, but we know they’ll be happy and grateful. We may do a couple more if any other Santas fall through. It was SO MUCH FUN shopping for this! Also, this lapsed Catholic really digs Pope Francis. He’s a step in the right direction. 🙂

  151. Nice card 🙂

    I’m working with a few organizations to either obtain or re-instate their 501(c)(3) status.

  152. Our Family tradition is to go out on Christmas Day, before we have opened presents, and hand out trays of cookies and treats to those who have to work on Christmas. Usually we go to hospitals, pharmacies, hotels, gas stations, and fire departments. One year we went to a Waffle House and we got the best response ever.

    It is our way of giving back. We make them as anonymous as possible, but we do put business cards on the backs, so folks won’t think we’re poisoning them. That wouldn’t be very Christmassy.

  153. I have been adopting platoons for the last several years for the duration of their deployments. I send them packages full of jerky, twizzlers, socks & baby wipes. The majority of my troops have come home safely. also, I made my work team adopt a bunch of ordnance disposal troops for the holidays and we’re sending them holiday stockings. They’re like the Hurt Locker platoon, so these stockings need to be amazing. I have an entire office chock full of candy & toiletries that I bullied people into donating. And I really did bully, which I am not terribly proud of… So the method is not so nice, but the end result is going to be awesome.

    I think you should petition Pope Francis – he seems like a cool guy…

  154. Seems like your chances of getting James Garfield canonized are better with this Pope than any other one. You know, with him being all about caring about your fellow many and other stuff Jesus said was important. I’ll be donating some sort of thing to someone via your blog. Merry Christmas!

  155. I work at a mental health call center / crisis line. I’ll be working 10 hours on Christmas Eve, 10 hours on Christmas Day, and 10 hours on New Year’s Eve. It is the job I do every day, but those days can be pretty tough ones for folks.

    (I love everyone here, but I’m sending a special high-five to you. Those calls save lives. Thank you for that. ~ Jenny)

  156. I donated to Project Night Night for the first time ever because I found out about it from this blog. I did switch up my giving and instead of a charitable donation at Christmas I’m now giving every month to FeedAmerica as being hungry totally sucks.

    My sister was also recently in a car accident and cash is short for her on a good month and it’s nearly Christmas and she’s got two kiddos so I just gifted her $200 smackers because I’m an awesome sister like that and because I’m happy she’s alive, and because being a kid and having no money to get gifts totally sucks.

    So I guess I just rambled a lot to tell you that, while I’m not giving to your indicated charities I am giving. Though, OMG next year I should totally auction off some cookies to raise money for charity. I decorate cookies. Awesome ones. I wish I would have thought of this sooner. I’m an idiot…. but a fairly nice one so I guess that evens out.

  157. Every year I get my husband to take handmade catnip toys our local SPCA. Each cat gets hand-delivered one toy from “Santa”. (I don’t go, because I have 3 cats already, and I wouldn’t be able to control myself into not bringing any home.) Plus, we usually take cleaning supplies as well – they always welcome dish soap, laundry soap.

  158. Angry bees are so last year. Or at least what I sent my internet bestie last year. I’m thinking ducks this year. Or maybe a vegetable garden.
    Last night I babysat my dear and excellent friend’s three kids so she could have a night out with her man. Which probably doesn’t count because I got to hold a little squishy and be entertained by two literary and crafty badasses. This entry should probably go to her.

  159. A few years ago, my brother-in-law and his wife got us toilets and showers for Christmas…. or, rather, they donated enough to Oxfam for a village in Africa to receive them. We’ve been fans ever since and occasionally “buy” a pig or a flock of ducks or chickens. I love the idea of bees, though. I know two people at least on my list who will be getting bees this year.

  160. We are donating food for elementary school kids to take home over Christmas break. That’s two weeks that they aren’t getting school breakfast and lunch. Every bag of ramen helps!

  161. I am so excited about this! I will be sharing the post with my friends and maybe even sending bees to people!

  162. The highlight of my year is shopping for Toys for Tots and/or Boston Children’s Hospital. I love buying craft kits and puzzles and little tea sets and Legos. And I got a very significant raise this year, for which I am incredibly grateful. And what better way to spend a raise than on toys for kids who wouldn’t have them otherwise?

  163. My favorite part about Heifer is that if you can’t afford to donate a whole cow in someone’s name, you can just donate a portion of it. So you can give someone a cow’s butt for Christmas. 🙂

  164. So far I made Chrostmas boxes and chose girls age 10 to 12.

    I’ve also purchased bracelets to support my friend Amy’s foundation to get clean water to people. I’ve known Amy for years and fully support her, if people love water they might want to give clean water to other people. http://justonehope.org/

  165. I’m getting my poor kitty knee surgery. We found out on Thanksgiving (well, technically the day after at 3:30am) that she’s got bilateral luxating patellas, which is a degenerative congenital problem where her kneecaps dislocate. We discovered this when all of a sudden her back legs looked crippled and she couldn’t walk and was crying. It was so awful. She’s getting her surgery consult on Wednesday and hopefully the surgery soon after. Since this is going to be $500-1000, I’m not able to donate this year, and we are basically skipping Christmas for ourselves. I’m fine with that. Monkey (yep, a cat named Monkey) is more important.

  166. Obsessed with your blog! And James Garfield (as well as the balance of your taxidermy family). This year my husband and I decided that instead of doing gifts to each other, we’d adopt a family instead. I can’t say it’s been entirely selfless because I enjoy shopping for kids 10000x more than shopping for my husband, but I’m glad we are helping out someone else that needs it.

  167. If someone wants they can just drop chickens and goats off in my backyard. If they are just there one day the one who says he is the sensible one in our house can’t send them away right??? I love all that you do! Off to go donate!

  168. I am linking this page to my Facebook and LiveJournal to get the word out. I have not so much of the money this year but I can make others aware.

  169. This year all the adults in my family agreed to not buy any gifts for each other this year (we still have to buy for the kiddos, those greedy little shysters!) and do a charitable act together instead. But maybe I can convince my husband to send bees to his former boss….what? He doesn’t actually get the bees himself? Oh….maybe we will opt for the poison card after all. Winning!

  170. Last year at Christmas my mom was super depressed, so when I showed up on Christmas eve I brought lots of extra decorations and helped make the house (and mom’s heart) more festive. The prior year my sister (who is a single mom) had just been laid off, so I worked with her to make sure that my nieces still had a magical Christmas.
    This year I haven’t found my inspiration to make someone’s Christmas a little better yet, but I suspect it will involve a surprise visit to my Dad’s place before Christmas.

  171. I’d like to nominate a friend of mine, Natali. She and her daughters spent the whole month of November doing random acts of kindness for strangers. When they found out their elderly downstairs neighbor didn’t have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving, they brought the lady food and some nice lavender bath salts that she loved.

    Also, Yiddish the bomb. My favorite curse is: Gai kaken afen yamen! (Go shit in the ocean!)

  172. Thank you for finally making me get off my ass and do something! Been “meaning” to donate to Heifer for some time and simple procrastination kept telling me “I’ll do it later”. No time like the present!

    This could become a habit! It was hard to decide what to do…but I figure you know what? There’s at least 11 more months to choose from!

  173. So, I think I’m going to have to suck it up, and dress up as Santa this weekend. Not a pretty sight – I’m a 5’3″, graying, portly gal. Dressing as Santa, to wrangle pets for pictures, to raise big bucks for the local animal shelter. Putting my money where my mouth is, when I’d rather be collecting it from the people buying pictures. If I have to stand up next to a Great Dane, someone’s gonna really be disappointed! Well, at least it’s LIVE animals!
    Give my best to James Garfield (and believe it or not, I’ll be right down the street from President James A. Garfield’s house in Ohio)!

  174. The kids and hubby and I donated 5 new big toys to the toy bin in the mall. The firefighters take the toys and distribute them to local families.
    Keep up the great work Jenny!

  175. Last year I donated several chickens and goats through Oxfam, but my favourite? A bag of poo. Brilliant on so many levels! Anyone complains about charity gifts deserves a bag of poo, and people who are awesome appreciate it outright.

  176. I spent some money from my first grown-up paycheck to buy a kid some duplo block for Toys for Tots. I figured if I loved mine so much as a kid, some other little kid would too. And they’re gender-neutral which is great. Also, my church donated a whole tree worth of mittens, hats, scarves, and warm socks to family services for the Lakota nation. Because South Dakota is cold. James Garfield is wonderful, and I will share this awesomeness with others.

  177. I do nice things all the time for my children, who are too busy being ungrateful, they don’t notice. I spend a good amount of time doing nice things for my sons school, like running the freakin’ parent group… I also did it at the preschool, and will probably do it again when my youngest is moved onto middle school (which in my town is grades 4-7, weird, I KNOW). I plan/coordinate all sorts of free family events at our school which has a 90% poverty rate right now, and a 5% homeless rate, as we have a couple hotels in our schools district who participate in the “right to shelter” program we have in Mass. where families who are (or about to be) homeless sign up and get boarded in places such as hotels because there aren’t enough beds in shelters. In early October we had a sudden influx of over 50 grade K-3 kids in our little school of 200. We had to hire 2 new teachers to accommodate the new kids, and we had no idea they were coming. some of the families have been placed in housing, but many remain, and many come and go, and our school sees most of it. We have 2 other elementary schools in our town, who aren’t [directly] affected.
    Many of these new families have the sweetest children, and homelessness is such a very real problem that happens to “normal” people.

  178. A friend just celebrated her birthday and for part of her present, I donated to the Georgia Jack Russell Rescue in her name. She volunteers with that group.
    We also have a tradition of donating to Heifer at Christmas as a “present” from my kids to their grandmother. No worries, though, it’s what my mother-in-law requests.

  179. I seriously love that it took me forever and a day to scroll down to be able to comment. Way to get people going! I would love to get a James Garfield card to send to my friend who came with me to see you in St. Louis. She is a wonderful sarcastic person who is stuck everyday with elementary school children who suck the life out of her. She’s a Elementary Librarian and she’s also awesome enough to let me use her back room at school to store the food that I use for the Operation Backpack program at said school. Love helping the kiddos! Would love a x-mas card with curse words!

  180. Our Elf On The Shelf will appear with $$ and a map instructing the littles to pick out gifts for less fortunate littles and deposit them in the Toys For Tots barrel. Giving really does feel good, even though it’s a tough sell at first.

  181. –>Set up a Toys 4 Tots drive for the folks in our 21 story building. It was sad to learn that the kids often overlooked in the drive are 9-11 years old.

    -deb

  182. I like the idea of helping kids, but I always go down to the local shelter and bring food and toys to the cats and dogs. I don’t want the animals thinking they cant have a Christmas as well. 🙂

  183. This year I am hand making all of my family art that I know they will enjoy and custom painting the frames to match because those poeple have been wonderful for me and they deserve something awesome this year.

  184. Thanks for the reminder, Jenny. I have the heifer catalog around here somewhere. I’m crazy about goats, I think they are so neat, so that might be a fun one to give. I wonder if I can specify those adorable fainting goats? And thanks for all you do to pass the giving spirit around each year. James Garfield is the bomb.

  185. Each year my department gathers donations from throughout our company and purchases items for the three kindergarten classes at a low-income school in our area. We provide each child with a sweatshirt, underwear, socks, a t-shirt, toothbrush & toothpaste, a book, a coloring book & crayons, a toy and some candy.
    We take the items to the classrooms and spend the afternoon reading with them and making crafts. The reaction of the kiddos is priceless. They’re so overjoyed about something as simple as a toothbrush. It makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and also like an asshole for always taking everything for granted.
    Happy Holidays.

  186. This year I am not able to do any good things for others. My father-in-law has found his way to the VA to enjoy his Thanksgiving/Christmas break down without the hassle of dealing with family. Which officially makes him the smartest man I know. If I would have though of it I totally would have joined him for Thanksgiving.. The man happens to be one of my favorite people ever with a fantastic personality. Bi-polar and all he still has the best attitude about almost everything. Unfortunately my mother-in-law and husband (who don’t suffers from any sort of mental illness-jerks) don’t get the hilarity that my dear ole dad and I do. They are always confused when we get on the phone and laugh non stop for the full time.. totally forgetting to let the others ask how he is. You see we’ve decided to blame them for our mental issues and are working in conjunction to get our positions reversed where Dad and I get to stay out of the hospital and we get to institutionalize them in our place. They are all moody and stressed when we are in so it only seems fair to give them the vacation and good drugs while we worry about bills and feeding the kid/dogs. Because… well we are both bat-shit crazy and would totally send our electric bills in crayon… We would laugh and since they tend to give us drugs on the outside as well it seems like the best case scenario.. How to tell your family you love them you ask? with a 72 hour hold and Vicodin! You’re Welcome and Merry Christmas! Now I could use a hug…

  187. Hey, LouLou (comment #208), how does one donate a bag of poo? I’m assuming it’s a bag of fertilizer. Is that in the Heifer donations list and I just missed it, or is it another charity.

  188. For the past few years my boyfriend and I have been thinking about going and paying off someones layaway at Kmart. It’s been done, and I know the people at Kmart are more understanding than trying to do something like that at Walmart. We’ve just never had the cash flow to manage to do it, but this year we’re going to go in, talk to the employees and hopefully find a few layaway accounts full of childrens stuff that might not be paid off in time. Anonymously and all sneaky like. Last year we did end up buying a homeless man lunch, some snacks and giving him a ride to a shelter 45 minutes away. He was crying when he realized he’d have his own bed, and a TV that he could watch his AM preachers on. We hung out with him for a few hours, chatted, and paid for him to get a haircut and a shave.

  189. I lost my job in July 2012 and am now trying to make a go of being a Virtual Assistant but will likely cash out one of my “get rich glacially slowly” projects (taking online surveys) and donate.

    However, my good deed project for this year is that I have a friend living in Costa Rica in a horrible situation and she wants to come to the States (she’s a US citizen) but doesn’t have a job or anything so I’m going to have her stay with me until she gets things figured out. I really wish that I had a house, instead of an apartment, so she could always have somewhere she could call “home”, but I’ve got an awesome air bed and a space for her to sleep so I’m doing the best with what I have.

    I wish I could do more and hope that next year I will have lots of clients so I CAN do more and help contribute to James Garfield’s Sainthood!

  190. I bought a book for our library in honor of my new nephew. “Everybody Poops” is now a part of the IMCPL in honor of baby Liam. I can’t wait until this kid graduates college.

  191. I helped a little old lady get toilet paper down from a high shelf.
    I know it sounds weird as most things I do are but she was quite shocked when I handed it to her.
    She must have some real asshats around her if she considers that a big deal.

  192. It’s the 4th year already? Time for me to get busy then…
    It was that first year that inspired my family to put toys and books together and then find a needy kid (using Craigslist and Kijiji) to give them to. We’ve been doing this ever since year 1.

    Do you see all this Pope? Surely a guy who used to be a bouncer (for reals. Look it up) would think this miracle worthy.

  193. BeeBelle, aim for a full IEP, not a 504, if you can possibly do so. An IEP is a much bigger stick to beat up teachers with. (Moving from a 504 to an IEP was Best Thing Ever for my kid.) The sooner you request a meeting with your school’s Student Services/Special Ed folks, to upgrade to the IEP, the sooner that ball can get rolling, hopefully. Good luck!!

    (Sorry, Bloggess, but I have not been a very helpful person this year. *sigh* Have only gotten a couple of the feast-in-a-box things from the local store to donate to the local food pantry, and need to track down where the Salvation Army is so I can get rid of a lot of the kid’s old clothing that is not worn out.)

  194. You’re great and an inspiration.
    Last weekend I volunteered at our local Help Portrait event (even though I just had cataract surgery two days before). Sure hope those portraits look okay to people with normal eyesight.
    But my all time favorite charity is Zimkids Orphan Trust… visit them at http://www.zimkids.com … Some absolutely amazing and phenomenal people are at the heart of this organization. They offer a safety net for 200 Zimbabwean orphans by providing food, medical needs, tutoring, and so much more.
    So that’s where my $ and my energies go, Jenny. But maybe I”ll buy some bees for my next door neighbor who yells at me every year because my leaves blow in his yard.

  195. My kids are getting Christmas in spite of the fact that they act like Santa is a punk ass bitch who don’t run shit. -_-

  196. I am in a non-profit group called AZ TARDIS. We basically use Doctor Who cosplay and awesomeness to raise money for charity. The group even built its own full size TARDIS which as we speak is being stuffed full of canned food at a local record store. Nerdiness + helping people = rad.

    (Also I made a craft beer advent calendar for my husband, but that isn’t exactly helping the needy, it is just helping him drink delicious surprise beers)

  197. I heard on the radio that today is Giving Tuesday and I thought- oh no…. I haven’t done anything.
    Low and Behold – Jenny saves my Butt!!!

    I donated to the Night Night thing and that feels awesome.
    I would totally do the other, but I am overly short on cash this year. Moving across country and no real full time job sort of takes the fun out of it.

    Thanks for all the crazy you share!!!!

  198. I noticed a homeless man sittin in front of a store while I started my Christmas shopping.
    While i was shopping for friends and family, I bought him a new hat, mitts, a scarf, new socks (you can never have enough clean warm socks) and a warm sweater.
    It wasn’t much, but it was all i could afford. He was so happy and appreciative, it warmed my heart.

  199. I’d totally take a loved one on a trip somewhere they’ve never been and never thought they could make it, because they don’t have the money.

  200. My photographer friends & I are donating to a family in need, as well as doing family photos for homeless/domestic violence shelter… I got so much from strangers growing up poor, I love to give back. Thanks for all you do, Jenny… xoxo

  201. I want a Llama! No, really, a llama for me, not a llama for some deserving person in another country… I guess that’s selfish and I should just bask in their llama-ness.

    Anyhoo, the thing that I’m doing this Christmas is donating wooly scarves and toiletries to the Sisters of the Poor who run a foodbank and give donated gifts to people who wouldn’t otherwise get them.

  202. I once volunteered to sort toys at the toys for tots warehouse – hardest most backbreaking work I’ve ever done! Also taught me what types of toys to donate (focus on well-boxes toys and think about teenagers- no one buys for teens and they need Christmas love too!)

    Project Night Night rocks- send them money!

    And whoever called us the Bloggess Army- awesome- the BA… Nearly as awesome as “lawsbians” 🙂

  203. For Mom I donated to the David Sheldrick Wildlife Trust (they foster elephants and rhinos orphaned by poachers); for my big brother I donated to the National Geograhic “Build a Boma, Save a Lion” program; and for my little brother I donated to TAPS (Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors – TAPS is the 24/7 tragedy assistance resource for ANYONE who has suffered the loss of a military loved one, regardless of the relationship to the deceased or the circumstance of the death.) I really like the Be a Santa for a Senior program too. I think I’ll do that as well. And this is not holiday specific, but on Saturdays, I take cases of water and donuts down to the homeless folks who live under the interstate overpass. After I purge my closet, I’ll be taking all my clothes to them as well.

  204. I’ve been carrying a little human in my uterus for 8 months now. This is probably the nicest thing I’ve done for anyone ever. I wouldn’t carry his father around for 8 months even though I married the guy.

    He’s probably not going to thank me for all the tasty calories and warm sleeping place when he comes out, though. Oh no, I’m sure he’s going to be an ungrateful little wretch until sometime after college when he realizes how good he had it all those months.

  205. I promise NOT to STAB anyone this Christmas season. (unless they REALLY need to be STABBED! then I’ll do it….)

  206. I’d love a card! I’m collecting used sheets, blankets, and yoga mats for the local no-kill animal shelter.

  207. This year as money is tight I am painting for my family members.
    Thanks for cheering me up today Jenny you are the best.

  208. I’m continuing to feed and house our cat even though he is working steadily at scratching up our new couch. He doesn’t deserve my kindness! But seriously we have started donating every month to our local food bank. The first month I took my three year old grocery shopping and he picked out the food. Last month I chose $20 of diapers and wipes. Every little bit helps and I hope he grows up to help others when he can.

  209. I am heading up a “random acts of Christmas kindness” campaign at the school I teach at in order to help curb bullying this holiday season.

  210. I needed this. My husband’s exwife just asked for child support early because she is one of the many unemployed this year and fear eviction. I was crabby about it, but this reminded me to be grateful for what I have and give what I can. I am also going to donate bees, or a goat, or a pig or something in the name of my stepson (he’s 13) as part of his Christmas. Not the same as opening a present, but totally worth it.

  211. I’m probably not stabbing anyone this holiday season. That count as something nice?

  212. There’s something in my eye. Something other than a lens, vitreous humor and stuff.

  213. I love lamas! I am doing something nice for my daughter. While she is at her Dad’s this weekend I am using all of her paintings to turn our home into a wonderland. I also emailed the answers to tomorrows assignment to six of my classmates but I don’t know if voluntary plagerism counts….

  214. I try to highlight dog rescue (more specifically Doberman rescue) fundraisers. But really, I do that all year. So it might not count as a holiday thing? I dunno. Whatevs. You should totally send Pope Francis a James Garfield card. He seems like a guy who can appreciate a good chuckle.

  215. Instead of running away in terror of saying Happy Holiday to me from the salvation army ringers this year…actually have a few extra dollars and cents with me to drop in their buckets and maybe hand off a Snickers bar to them or coffee…or a llama. Though, it maybe hard to get that into those little buckets….but with some duct tape and a screw driver…..endless possibilities!!!

  216. Bless you, Jenny. You helped me get my head out of my ass and stop feeling sorry for myself. As soon as my bank refunds the money some complete asshole took out of my bank account to pay for their plane ticket to Brazil, I will be making some donations.

  217. I’m donating to Heifer through Pat Rothfuss’s Worldbuilders charity, and also buying Christmas presents for people through their associated Tinkers Packs store (portion of proceeds goes to Heifer through Worldbuilders). We do this every year since we discovered it in 2011!

  218. Is the llama’s name Lorenzo or Dolly? (I can’t take credit for coming up with these llama names, but I love them nonetheless).

    I am going to my annual women lawyers’ fundraising event this week. The proceeds go to help two local charities, one that helps teen mothers and the other that provides kids with winter coats, gloves and other outerwear. The

  219. My Daughter & I like to donate books to our local kid’s Hospital. Merry M’F’N EVERYTHING!!!!

    Cards for my bestie in jail PLEASE!!!

  220. Just finished the angel tree shopping for 2 children in our area. Unfortunately, it led to a difficult, total mom fail moment on my part. Fortunately, 2 children will now have Christmas. I am going with the glass is half full.

  221. It’s all kinds of motherfucking awesome. We adopt a family from the crisis center each year. It is sad to see their wish list which includes blankets, shoes, socks 🙁

  222. HEH!

    This Pope is not “slightly less creepy.”

    He is awesome.

    Note: he has said the “shepherds need to smell like the people they serve”.

    Which means the one serving your house smells like?

    Whoa, dude.

  223. I made a Target wish list for the tornado victims in Central IL, where I grew up. Since I can’t go back home right now to help in person, this has to do. 🙂

  224. We have a book exchange at work (I work for a federal health agency, where there is a great deal of pressure.) I bought out the metaphysical book section of Borders when they closed and I drop off a few books at a time at the exchange table. They are usually gone in 2-3 minutes, whereas the romance and spy books sit there for weeks. Someone saw me do it one day and came running after me, asking me where I was getting all these books and why I was giving them away. I told her that it’s my way of spreading the dharma. When she looked puzzled, I told her that I had no idea what it meant either, but that the books make me feel good, so I thought I’d spread some joy, ninja-style. Namaste bitches!

  225. Well.. I love this! I wish I could afford to donate, I’ll share though! We’re totally doing the”rewrap shit you already have” for my almost 3 year old and 1month old. For Christmas I’ll be slightly less of a bitch to my mil (but she’s Jewish so I don’t have to be completely pleasant…right?).
    Love you Jenny!

  226. I’m doing nice for others by being my amazing self. I think (KNOW) it really brightens their day.

  227. We getting a house with a lift system built for a Mom with 3 adult kids in wheelchairs. At 55 yrs old she still lifts them in and out of their wheelchairs.

  228. I want a card… To go with my copy if your book!!
    At the museum the Santa said,” Do you want to know what Santa wants for Christmas?” I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer to that question. Before I could reply he said, ” I want you to call the museum and complain about this little train table right in front if Santas living room set up!” I thought,” Santa is a dick! Not every kid wants story time with Santa. Some enjoy playing with the train table 10 foot from the train rides!” But he restored my faith in Santa when he gave me the reason: “There is a huge, dog boned shaped, train table in the back hallway that they use in Santas living room in the past. Please tell them you want that train table to make a comeback!!!” So I use my cell to call member services and get Santa the”gift” he wanted!!! He was actually impressed with me! I totally made it to the nice list this year!!!

  229. I am new to this wonderful, bizarre world. It is as if my brain finally found it’s own internet happy place 🙂 I am trying to work with Vitanna to send two kids to school – but just as a small donation. My husband is a post-doc and I am a grad student so money is tight – but we try. And I say this – you can help by just talking to someone in line who looks lonely, buying the coffee for the person behind you, or helping someone carry bags to the car. It is amazing how kind people have been to me in random circumstances – just stay open for the little things since, especially on tight budgets, it feels so hard to help with money you do not have to spend. Or a bag of bees – that does sound perfectly amazing 🙂

  230. I want a card too! I’m in Canada, so I’ll tell you what I’ve done in this country to make me worthy of a James Garfield card: I made a committment in January to give 2% of my earnings to charity this year. Since then, I have supported a boy named Jean in Haiti through Plan International, a woman named Raisa in Afghanistan through Women for Women International, and I have used a great website called Chimp.net to send money through the interwebz to the Canadian Red Cross (for Phillippines disaster relief), to the Nature Conservancy (because I love me some nature), to Ballet British Columbia (because I saw their interpretation of Giselle this spring and want to keep seeing it over and over and over again), and to the Canadian Cancer Agency (because cancer sucks, yo). Hope that deserves a card!

  231. This year we donated toys to Toys for Tots. I think we will donate to Project Night Night too! Thanks for the post, you rock! 😀

  232. I haven’t given much this year. I have taken my niece and nephew out a few times since I’ve returned to Seattle, which I think gives to me at least as much as it gives to them. I am here emotionally and physically for my two housemates who sometimes need to vent or share. (Although, they are supporting me while I look for work.) I am making gifts for folks this year because I like to do so; I’m just fortunate that crocheting simple things is cheaper than most other gifts.

    In the past, I gave my old car (in really excellent condition) to friends who didn’t have a workable vehicle; I paid friends to bring my mom’s car (which I inherited) to me in Texas and to bring my old car to friends back in Oregon. I also gave those friends my old laptop when theirs died. But I haven’t had anything to share with anyone this year and I’m running kinda low on funds, so I’ll probably stick to just making gifts for people and being there so my friends always have an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or a hand to help.

  233. I have not lost my shit not one time this week. Also, a lady in front of me at the grocery store accidentally hid her pasta under her purse and didn’t realize it till I was already checking out, so I said, “Put that shit on my tab!” For real. It was like a $1.39 or something. And, I almost forgot, a couple weeks ago I saw a family on a corner with a sign that said “help us get to California” and although what I *really* wanted to do was question them intensely about their circumstances and how well this method of fundraising was going, instead I showed great restraint and just gave them all the cash I had. Which, granted, was not much….Well, my husband just fucked that up. I have actually lost my shit this week. Forget I said anything.

  234. I bought shoes for one of the kids in my class yesterday that was wearing them 3 sizes too small. Does that count?

  235. Thanks so much – Project Night Night sounds very sweet, and I was happy to donate! 🙂

  236. I left a $50 tip on a $50 bill at the nail salon Sunday for no better reason other than I was feeling bad about feeling vain and just felt like it and appreciate being lucky enough to do so. Damn onions.

  237. I got my co-works to help me write dozens of holiday cards to the troops donated through the Red Cross 🙂

  238. I would love to help, but the husband is on the cusp of a lay off and I just can’t afford it. I wish you all the best in helping the little one’s with Night Night bags and I hope many, many heifers get to their new home. I would a card from you. It would never be put away, like my Christmas slut ornament and my two ducks with guns ornaments!

  239. I’m not able to help other people however this is the first year I will be able to give my two kids a decent normalish Christmas, as in, we are in our own place and will have our own tree with lights and ornaments this year. I love watching the goodness be spread!

  240. Love the Project Night Night and will donate to them this year.
    I get so frustrated year after year trying to get a good photo of my kids (who hate having their picture taken), plus the cost of cards and postage, then knowing each card will be thrown away in a few weeks. So I decided this year no Christmas cards. Not one. Calculated what I’d spend and donating that to local food bank. I feel much more in the spirit of the season with this decision.

  241. My list feels so weak right now, but I’m doing what I can. I contributed to funding a health documentary, and to medical research. I also reached out to someone who was having a hard time.

    And I let my cat sit on me. A lot.

    (…but that’s mostly for me)

  242. Husband and I like to reward the people who are joyfully working hard. When we go out to eat during the holidays, we tip 100% of the bill. That extra money doesn’t make much of a difference in our pockets, but, having worked in the service industry before, we know what it means to the server. Makes me feel happy and warm inside, even though we never get to see their face when they look at the credit card receipt.

  243. We downsized our Christmas tree last year so that it’s now about 3 feet tall. Now we are donating large ornaments and other Christmas type things for other people to use. And we will participate in the Giving Tree at church. Thanks Jenny for all you do.

  244. We’re going to the ladies group at the assisted-living home, and giving holiday-themed manicures!

  245. I donate my bodily fluids every 8 weeks. Does that count as “doing something nice?”

    Of course, by bodily fluids I mean blood…. menstrual blood?… no not menstrual blood. Geez.

  246. The people I know don’t need *things* so most of them are getting charitable donations this year. Heifer (a garden basket, not bees), CURE Childhood Cancer, Kiva, rescue.org, and globalgiving.org. Project Night Night has just been added to my list. 🙂

  247. Love this! We always buy presents for our third (imaginary) child and donate to toys for tots. Feeling fruitful I think we can manage to by an oxen and toys. Thank you for reminding us what is important….and what is funny!

  248. So my real contribution to my family is that I’m having the first grand-baby which got my grandmother (Mawmaw) to come for Christmas for the first time in 8 years – she is slightly obsessed with her great grand baby and being the great Mawmaw. For this I get daily kicked in the ribs by an overactive tiny human male – wondering if this is some kind of biblical reference to the whole Eve thing.

    Anyway, my other contribution is I’m helping all the loudly complaining people by purchasing their Christmas presents for them when they don’t have: the time, corresponding coupons or a credit card to order stuff online. I’m like a really tall elf.

    Happy Holidays!

  249. I already give a monthly donation to Heifer for bees, but I’ll pony up a little more…

    You are quite an inspiration in a weird, twisted sort of way!

  250. Such a wonderful thing to do. Even if the Pope doesn’t Canonize our dear bodiless boar.

  251. I’m going to bring my puppy on a 300 mile trip to meet my grandmother who is in hospice care. She asks about the little fuzzball every time I talk to her.

  252. My best friend has an aggressive and advanced cancer that was just diagnosed early 2013. She tried an experimental treatment but the effects of the treatments left her near death. She was placed in hospice. Since she has stopped treatment she is feeling much better and has now moved to the UK equivalent of a nursing home.

    She has a granddaughter who will be 2 in March. I am sending her as many recordable books that I can find so she can record them while she is still feeling up to it. This way her current granddaughter and any future grandchildren can have ‘Nan’ read to them.

  253. i love you jenny,,my cousin and i have sent each other bees a few times,, and we like each other quite well i assure you,,it never occurred to me to send them to someone i dont like… BRILLIANT! doing this soon,,

  254. I did my good deed. My friend found two Angel Tree tickets floating around in the greeting card section of a store. She posted them online and I found who they belonged to. They were lost tickets but two others needed gifts so I took them on. I got The Lawsbians involved and they donated small amounts of money to raise about $70 so that the kids could have pants, shirts, dinosaurs, and unicorns. My friend did the shopping since she lives in the same city where the. Angel Tree church is located. Thanks for being an inspiration. <3

  255. My daughter’s Girl Scout troop (3 high school girls) can never decide what to collect or who to donate to at Christmas time (typical teenagers). So I think you just made things that much easier with Project Night Night and Heifer.org
    Thanks for making the next meeting a little less of a headache for me!! 🙂

  256. Finally after the longest 5 years, this Christmas I am not homeless so that makes it the best Christmas EVER!

    My thoughts and prayers go out to those who still are. <3

  257. I went without as a child, and thanks to generous adults like the ones who read your blog, I got a present *every* year. So now, as an adult, I pull an ornament from The Giving Tree (a local charity that helps kids in need get presents for Christmas). Some years, I get 2 ornaments. But I feel like giving back is the only possible way to show my gratitude. <3
    Thanks for being awesome, guys. Everyone who donates is someone's hero. Even if you donate the bees. 'Cause seriously, we need more honey bees. 🙂
    Happy Holidays, guys! The world needs more people like you.

  258. We gave two bags of groceries (canned goods) to our local Salvation Army. Not the militant wing though. I think we will buy from heifer International for all our family. Probably honey bees bc they’re really in troube and the loss of the worlds pollinators is a scary scary thing…

  259. My brother works for Lutheran World Relief, where you can buy WORMS for someone. I’m not sure which is better [worse]: bees or worms.
    But I’m pretty sure I know what his kids are getting for Christmas.
    http://lwrgifts.org/worms.aspx

  260. This year I’ve asked everyone to not buy me presents, but instead to consider donating to my charity climb up a skyscraper benefiting the Respiratory Health Association in honor of my late stepdad. If I can help fund more research then maybe other people won’t have to say goodbye to their dads too soon.

    But I might buy some angry bees too.

  261. Because of you, my student have donated to Project Night Night two years in a row. I’m going for three! My husband, son, and I also buy bees and chickens from Heifer every year. Thank you for the llama!

  262. I am pitching a project to my city manager before Christmas. If he (and City Council) approves it, my project will train people on how to deconstruct buildings instead of demolishing them. They will then take the salvaged materials to sell in a retail store (which will also provide training and jobs) or recycle. The city will get rid of vacant buildings that should be torn down, people will get training and jobs, and we’ll reduce the amount of waste going to the landfill by up to 85%. Hipsters will be able to buy that mid-century modern faucet! If my project succeeds, I will have helped people get real skills and jobs. It won’t be in time for the holidays, but it just might have a truly lasting impact on my city. This isn’t to brag on me. I just had an idea one day and had the support of my boss to run with the idea. I’m so grateful that I have a boss (finally) who doesn’t try to beat the creativity and innovation out of me. Even if this project fails, at least I had the support and respect of my boss. That is truly a wonderful gift.

    I’m miles away from family but really want to make the giant meal. Anyone in the Tidewater Virginia area want to come over for Christmas?

    PS, should my comment be selected for a card, please send it to my friend Vikki. It would make her year.

  263. I got Heifer bees for my aunt for her birthday last month! Because she is a terrible person.

  264. I am going to a homeless shelter this weekend to lead a gift making event. It will also include cookie decorating. I also was a United Way captain for our dept and a Sunday School program leader.

    I love sites like Heifer because how fun is it to tell people you bought them a farm animal?!

  265. My husband’s unemployed this year. So I’ll tell him about the llama you bought for us all. He’ll be super stoked. He likes llamas. Especially when other people get them. Oh, and I’ll show him my tits. My husband, not the llama. I’m super charitable that way.

  266. Let’s see, I helped my parents move. This required me to see my step-siblings and be nice all while carrying heavy boxes. This made me feel kind of proud and proved that I can actually behave like an adult when necessary. Plus I ate a chocolate covered potato chip yesterday when it was offered to me so as not to offend the offerer. It was so good that it must come from the Devil.

  267. We organize a big service project party for local Girl Scouts. This year they made tons of ornaments, decorations and cards for nursing homes, blankets for the Linus Project, and donated over 350 canned goods to the local food pantry, over 300 items to the Yellow Ribbon Support Foundation and 2 cases of can tabs and 3 cases of coloring books to the Ronald McDonald House. This is the 18th year our scouts have done this!

  268. I donated to Project Night Night – one tote bag for each of my 7-year-old twins. Then printed out a letter telling them each how $20 they might have gotten for Xmas went to kids who don’t have a room full of blankets, books, and toys. Maybe next year I’ll let them pick the target of the donation…

    I also went to the True Colors Fund to donate on behalf of my 15-year-old daughter – helping with homeless LBGTQ teens.

    Jenny rules. Depression drools.

  269. Well this year I’ve helped recycle all the paper and stuff from my school. Not an easy feat. And I got my geography teacher chickens and a goat with my class. She was so excited that she got chickens and a goat (through Heiffer so she really just got a cute picture). Had she been mean of course she would have gotten some bees. Or a water buffalo because what do you say to that?

  270. Can’t afford to buy presents this year, so I made my 2 year old niece her own Waldorf doll out of an old t shirt and stuffed with an old stained college sweatshirt that my husband has been bugging me to toss out. Only cost was $4 for yarn for the hair, although now that I re-read this it uses the word “sweat” more often than you’d expect for a child’s toy. And then I sent $10 to Scary Mommy’s Thanksgiving fundraiser. Wish we could donate more this year, but that’s probably it for cash donations. Tell James Garfield that as a Jew I fully support his bid for sainthood.

  271. My good deed (or one if them anyway) is that I am organizing a blood drive for the American Red Cross at my workplace. Also, I plan to snarf down as many cookies as I can during the holidays to protect others from the risk of high blood sugar and cavities.

  272. I bought the single mother who is college bound soon, YAY! down the street a Kindle. Its nicer than mine actually. Is it bad to be jealous of a present?

  273. Did you see this?
    http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2013/12/03/pope-i-was-once-a-bar-bouncer/
    The Pope was a bouncer. Which is much cooler than a Pope that used to be a Nazi, by the way. But back to the Pope being a bouncer. The Pope was a bouncer. Did I already mention that the Pope was a bouncer?

    This is great news for James Garfield. If JG’s fans get unruly, the Pope totally has his back. His back, like he protects him, not like his actual back. Although we don’t really know who has his ACTUAL back, so the Pope could actually have his back, which would add yet another cool factor to Bouncer Pope Francis.

    As far as giving, if you’re looking for a good cause, my friend’s 6 year old cousin was in an accidental explosion two days ago. We’re trying to help him out. Feel free to visit http://www.gofundme.com/5jy0wk Or just send warm wishes his way. He’s a pretty brave little guy.

  274. Sorry, I was reading too fast and I thought you said “lick here”.

    This year I’m participating with a group of people from work and a local social services office to give gifts to children who wouldn’t otherwise be getting much, if anything. For “my” 2 kids: I got them exactly what was on their Christmas wish lists, which was something I always wished for as a kid.

    Merry merry little kids. And everybody else, even if there is no licking involved.

  275. I just donated to Project Night Night. We are also adopting a “grandparent” from the local nursing home.
    I would LOVE one of your cards! That is my style of decorating. Between my kids and my MIL, there is glitter and talking Santa’s all over this house. I NEED something with some cuss words on it.

  276. Every year my sister reminds me:
    “Oh yeah”, she says, “I remember the year you got me the GOAT.”
    Long telephone pause…..

  277. I do tons of nice shit for people all day. I drink coffee so I don’t kill them, I courtesy flush (sometimes even more than once) when I have to poop in a public restroom, and since I work with preschoolers and spend all day wiping asses and snotty noses that aren’t mine, I am an avid hand washer. Spread the love, not the nasty snotty/poop germs, I always say.

  278. My nice thing is that I posted on my Jewish friend’s Facebook the Yiddish phrases. Also I’m serving food at the local shelter’s Christmas party but mostly the Yiddish thing!

  279. I have little money, I am a therapist for kids who need those donations. But I would so love a card. It would be another way my sick humor will bolster my work with my kiddos and keep me moving on… just sayin’ Plus also, I think I will send some bees to my ex, he “deserves” them.

  280. I cooked Thanksgiving dinner for 9… while I had a stomach bug without making anyone else sick. THAT’S giving! Also, I live in the hope that one day we’ll be caught up enough on our own bills to help other people out with theirs… or to buy them llamas. Yo mama a llama!

  281. it would totally make my day if the Pope got it and responded. I am keeping my eyes peeled for his response.

  282. This is what the holiday season is all about! Thank you for bringing hope and joy to so many peeps.

  283. Ok – this has nothing to do with this post… buuuuut. I suggested my friend’s book club (based in charlotte, nc) read your book, because… well, I recommend it to everyone, always, because I laughed until I peed. Who doesn’t want to read a book like that? So, when confronted with “is your book club going to read my rec or not?” It turns out you’re up to bat, Jenny. In my jubilation, I whipped out my kindle to re-read some favorite chapters. Then I commented “I hope none of your southern belle book clubbers have a problem with foul language.” To which she replied: “oh shit.” I feel like this situation is already a giant win. I’ll let you know how it goes.

  284. Hey Jenny: I am going to support a Night Night, especially since they include BOOKS ( and you should absolutely write a children’s book-just maybe without the fucks and shits) but they only show Pay Pal. PP takes a cut off the front and back end. Any way to pay straight in so all the bucks go to the project ? PS: keep kicking ass, even taxidermied asses.

  285. I’m going to donate to both/all of those; that’s a great idea!

    What am I doing for someone this year? I choreographed two dances for my friend who has cancer, and filmed them, and I’m sending the video to him next week after months of people helping me out. So really, tens of people helped with this gift, and I’m hoping it gives him a little long-distance hug and cheer. Or a good laugh, something along those lines.

  286. I’m a nursing assistant, so that means we have to keep the facility staffed 24/7/365. I was lucky enough to be scheduled for my weekend on Christmas Day, but I have no family in the immediate area, so I’m switching with a coworker so she can spend Christmas with her kids.

  287. My parents and I adopted a little girl for a local charity – we bought a ton of stuff and it was soo much fun! Now, I’m trying to come up with crafts for 5 – 10 year olds for our school’s holiday charity party for kids (I’m a teacher in this story, BTW)…it should be a blast!

  288. I gave bees. I feel guilty because they seem to be disappearing now and I sure did kill a few of them as a kid (mainly because they would die when they stung me-assholes). I hope they bring someone honey and sustainable growing through pollination. Thanks for the idea, you rock like a Fraggle!

  289. My husband and I recently stopped buying gifts for everyone, and instead make donations in people’s names. Like some families, we fell into the “which gift card would Susie really like” category, and realized that all that money could go to much better use.

  290. We decided to do almost all of our gift shopping from independent artists and small businesses. I guess there are nicer things we could do (and I caved and bought a few things from a big store) but according to the notes we’re getting with our packages, we’re making a few people happy 🙂

  291. I was going to brag about how I’m buying toys for some Christmas wish cards, but I say give all the cards to the lady taking calls on New Years n Xmas

  292. Ten Project Night Night gifts given… one from me, others from random people above who couldn’t afford it. Spreading the love, because I don’t have Christmas cheer. Except, well, maybe a little.

  293. This year we are going to continue our tradition of paying off someone’s lay away at Kmart. Last year we were able to pay off 4 people’s lay always and they were able to take their kids toys home to wrap. It makes me feel good, it helps teach my children to help those that they can help and I usually get hugs out of the deal.
    Joycelyn

  294. I love this and will definitely help out! At least once a pay I try to do a pay-it-forward thing, usually buying the coffee of whoever’s in line behind me at the coffee shop. Nothing major, but what an awesome way to start off the day!

  295. I go the ‘random acts of kindness’ route. I pay for the groceries of the person behind me especially if it’s an elderly person obviously on a tight budget. I pay for the goods of the person behind me at retail stores esp when they are short of the total. And this year since my family has lost its holiday spirit, I am purchasing toys and clothes from the community tree, buying food for a friend who is out of work, and volunteering to help wrap gifts for the assisted living center I live next to. And maybe I’ll buy a heifer or some bees, who knows?

  296. I have two friends who are single moms and could not afford winter gear for themselves, only their kids. So I bought one a new winter jacket and the other one new snowpants. Both these women are such good mamas they would freeze before getting something for themselves, so I was the xmas fairy this year.

  297. I’m really poor this year, so I can’t donate, but I spend all day every day helping families with kids/brothers/sisters with disabilities navigate the (awful) system….

    And I love you. In a totally non-stalker-y, reader-y way. 🙂

    Kiss James Garfield for me. And thanks for the llama. <3

  298. First thing I’m going to do is see if #JamesGarfieldForSainthood can become a trending thing (along w/ links to PNN and Heifer). Going to purchase a couple of the Project Night Night packages too. Christmas Eve and Day I will be working at the nursing home, I volunteered since I have no little ones at home. Will do what I can for those who don’t have family coming in to visit, then go visit my mom at the assisted living place she lives in. Since I’ll be celebrating the end of 3 years of paying off a bankruptcy, yay me!, I am going to find someone in Portland who needs a little help and do what I can for them. That light down at the end of the tunnel isn’t a train for once.

  299. My dad died in August. I’m now the primary care giver for my elderly mother. Christmas this year is going to suck, but a James Garfield card would make it suck less. For me at least, it might freak my mother out.

  300. I can’t think of anything specific, but I try to do at least one small thing a day for someone, even if it’s just holding a door. And saying thank you to bus drivers and train conductors.

  301. I’m volunteering not to punch anybody in the face this holiday season. It’s a sacrifice, but hey, it’s Christmas.

    I suppose I’m joking. Maybe. 😉 At any rate, I plan to donate home cooked meals and snacks to a few folks who are shut-in due to illness…blue rolling walker in tow. It’ll be like a little TARDIS-colored Santa sleigh. I need a fez!

  302. I love that you do things like this. THanks for spreading the holiday joy this season (as corny as that sounds). You deserve an Ox too

  303. I’m a high school English teacher. Every year our school identifies needy children from the local elementary schools and we have a huge party for them. I sponsor Beta Club and we will buy gifts for one child and give them to her at the party. This is my 4th year participating in the party, and there is nothing better than seeing the faces of children light up at the sight of Santa Claus!

    p.s. I’m also a high school English teacher for seniors, so this time of year is HELL and a James Garfield card would make my life.

    p.p.s I also read excerpts from your book to my students when we are working on autobiographies. You have the best voice-and they especially love the story of Stanley.

  304. You know, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if the Pope actually did read your site. He seems pretty cool.

  305. I love the Project Night Night and 2010 efforts! I wish I could donate this year but I wont be able to. This year I spent pretty much all my ‘extra money’ adopting my son from foster care.

    I am not good at this saying ‘stuff I did for other people’ cause I feel like I am all ‘hey, look what I did’ which I am but really don’t mean it as a rub in anyone’s faces. gah. this is getting awkward. I am going to stop typing… now

  306. This is so great! We picked an “angel” to buy gifts for through church and I donate to Happy Bottoms since the thought of running out of diapers is horrifying.

  307. Well, since I can’t afford to do diddly squat this year (I was laid off on New Years Eve last year, Happy New Years to me! 😛 I couldn’t even tell anybody except for my hubby and son until Jan. 2, because I didn’t want to ruin New Years Day for them!) I am selecting a person a day over at http://www.dragcave.net and offering to breed a dragon for them off of my scroll. I can afford to breed pixels. Plus they are cool.

  308. I’ve coordinated Toys for Tots in my county for the past two years. (90% of the people can be entitled ass hats; it’s the 10% who really need/appreciate it that keeps me going.) I’ve also adopted a military family, gotten my Marine Corps League Detachment to adopt a military family and have donated toys & clothes to my work’s adopted family. I’ll probably donate to your night, night thingy too. I really don’t know when to quit. Merry Christmas.

  309. Awesome! My colleagues are doing a Secret Santa gift exchange. I hope I get my boss, and then I’ll give her some bees.

    I’m a teacher, and from following that link, I think I will introduce the read to feed program in my classroom. It is always good to start when they are young getting them to understand the joy of giving to others. We already read books from wegivebooks.org every day in our class.

  310. I love Heifer International! So excited that you support them too. I clicked through to the website and saw that you could donate for training and supplies for a community animal health worker. Since I’m a veterinarian, that was perfect for me! And I bought bees for my dad, whose hobby is beekeeping. Also, I’ve bought some presents for the local Angel Tree. I picked cards from two kids who wanted books–just like me when I was a kid. I’m so excited to go shop for books for them. I’m actually going to sneak out of a continuing education meeting tomorrow so I can hit a bookstore!

  311. I really love you (in a totally non-creepy way), Jenny and all the members of the Bloggess Army!!! Big kudos to the commenter who volunteers on a Crisis Line—I used to do that, too some years ago.

    You guys have me envious in the best way possible—I need to do my share of sharing the blessings too!!!

    Thanks for the llama!! I just donated a Project NightNight bag in honor of Jenny, the Bloggess.

  312. Usually I’m nice to people by not interacting with them since I have little patience but tonight we went to the awesome Lucky Dog Rescue Gingerbread Doghouse event and donated money for dog vaccinations, tests, etcetera. Technically, I guess that’s not something nice for another person but I think dogs are nice for people (if you’re not allergic) so I think it should count.

  313. I like to volunteer with Meals for the Elderly here in Angelo. It’s really neat to see the oldies and wish them a good day. I’m doing an event with them on Sunday. Bring my card to Old Fort Concho this weekend 😉 (In case you had plans of sending me one.) I hope you are coming!

  314. I’m caring for my beautiful mom who is having a double mastectomy next week. She is 77 and has very big boobs. She will miss them.

  315. I guess I really need to be nicer to people. Hopefully it’s not too late and the Dickens ghosts won’t be waking me up. I’m better at being nice to animals. I’ve donated to Turpentine Creek wildlife refuge — a true haven for big cats (and a few bears) in need.
    PS– I need Anonymous Coward #70 to come work the same miracle in my office.
    PPS– I think to be a saint you have to provide evidence of miracles and have followers. I’m setting up a shrine to James Garfield and will keep you posted.

  316. My 7 year old daughter and I have “adopted” two children off of a Salvation Army Angel Tree. We have spoiled them rotten in awesome gifts. Plus, my daughter decided for her birthday, which was on the 2nd, that she was going to ask her party guests to bring an unwrapped gift to donate to Toys For Tots.

    Love reading your blog, you are amazing! Thank you for keeping me smiling.

  317. I donated a Night Night bag again this year. I don’t have lots of extra cash, but I do have time so I help run a feeding program at my church one night a week where we feed 250-300 people a hot, home-style dinner.

  318. we live in colorado; a mom in florida, whom i’ve never met, was having trouble with finances. we connected through a secular parents group online. my kids picked out gifts for her kids and we got them sent off last week. it’s always nice to help a fellow mom just trying to do the best for her kids. 🙂

  319. I got the team hippy/do gooder in my workplace Kris Kringle, so i am getting him an orphan.

  320. Pretty much, I’m not killing little old ladies at Hancock Fabrics when I work… Does that count?

    On an up side, I am working to try and keep people positive on FighterFriendz, which is a fibromyalsia FB page where people with fibro come together to give support and/or bitch to people who understand what they are going through. the creator is an AWESOME chica, and you would like her 😀

  321. I am giving money to my friend Lot, who lives in the Philippines, who is in turn giving the money to some of the smaller islands in the Philippines that are not in the news and hence aren’t getting very much help yet.

    And I really enjoy reading your blog.

  322. I’m definitely clicking through to donate a few dollars to heifer!
    The nice thing I’ve been working on this year is getting space heaters for people without heat in rural SC. The whole thing started because I found out that landlords often get out of providing heat for their tenants when they rent mobile homes by just renting land that “just so happens to have a trailer on it”… It’s pretty lame, and when I found out that a teen mom at my high school was without heat for her and her baby girl, I reached out to the community and discovered there were many people willing to help! Anyways, good job being awesome, as usual! The pope would be crazy not to take note.

  323. This year our Indian Guides tribe, a parent child organization based off Native American values, is doing adopt a child. Each family in the program is adopting a child and getting a present based off a wish list the child made. We also are doing a food drive for a local food bank as admittance to our holiday party and I’ll be bringing a full bag of toothpastes, deoderants and Spam this year .

  324. How I adore honey. Though I dislike bees. Honey = delish. Being stung = sucks.

    Had a lot of fun this year filling a shoebox to be shipped to kids in need . Really loved the fact that some who decline people coming into their country accept the shoeboxes anyway – made me feel like I can get some little gifts and hygiene items to those who really need it.

  325. I’m staying drunk most of December. Which, if you knew me, is a huge favor to the world. So you’re welcome.
    Also I might make cookies for my neighbors. Maybe.

  326. I’m a seventh grade English teacher, and I organized giving each of the 189 7th graders in our team a book for Christmas. Wrapped and everything.
    also, I plan on not smacking any if them when they’re being anniying. Which is often, because they’re in 7th grade.

  327. Love Heifer Project–when I taught preschool, our class donated a bunch o’ chicks to some peeps! LOL! I just made myself LOL for reelz! 🙂 Keep up the good work, James Garfield–if you don’t get sainthood this year maybe we Jews can adopt you to be the Hanukkah Wildebeest or something. ?

  328. I am taking care of myself. I was diagnosed with PPD in May. I have three little boys, two cats, and a husband. And a job. Finally taking care of myself was the nicest thing I could do for everyone else.

  329. A girlfriend is moving here to AK w/ a suitcase, and her cats, RIGHT before Christmas… so, to ensure she has a festive and happy holiday (and the cats have something to bork-up) I will be chopping down a spruce that we will then decorate together. It is alright to chop down a tree b/c I recycled for almost a whole month in preperation! Yay!!!

  330. Monthly St. Jude children’s hospital donation for the last 5 years our so.

    And 10 Project Night Night packages ordered, which I *would* have put in honor of stuffed duck Jensen Quackles had I but known he existed at the time I placed the order.

  331. I’m coordinating a mini blanket drive for the homeless shelter where I work. (P.S. to Jenny: Please don’t sell my email address to make a quick buck.)

  332. Great ideas. Especially the murder of oxen. 🙂 I’m doing the standard giving trees but I also just bought my sister a house. Well half a house. So she can live near me but not with me and help take care of my kids. Not because I’m lazy or entitled, although hmm…, but because like you, I have RA, severe depression and a heart issue. No, it’s not too small, like the grinches. My kids love their aunt and I love being employed while I still can be employed, so it’s a win-win situation.

  333. I helped a strange nice lady at the grocery store this evening. She couldn’t find her cell phone, so we went to different spots at the store she might have left it and I called her number. It turned out to be on the front seat of her car. They should seriously make those things glow-in-the-dark. (I’m going to paint mine. Cell phone, not car. Although now that I think of it…)

    Anyway, I was able to help by doing almost nothing at all. That made me happy.

  334. How do you track donations to Project Night Night? Do you get credit if we use the link in your blog?

  335. Every year my best friend and I go on a toy shopping spree and donate huge bags of goodies to Toys for Tots through our local fire station. Neither of us has kids so it’s fun to finally get to buy all those crazy toys we can’t justify the rest of the year.

    As an extra bit of cheer this year I gifted another good friend of mine the cash she needed to make a giant batch of her famous caramel sauce to sell at the local farmer’s market so she can buy gifts for her family. I not only got a huge, teary eyed hug, but she gave me a giant jar of the best caramel sauce on the planet too!

    Smiles for everyone!

  336. I’m in for Project Night Night and will also donate to buildingadreaminthecountry.com (Comment #269 from Frosty). I also LOVED the subversive cross stitch kits posted by Sally in comment 329. Wow, I may need to take up cross stitch in 2014. Thanks for everything Jenny, you have no idea how much you are helping so many by just being you. Merry Christmas.

  337. I forwarded my amazon wish list to everyone…but there is not a single gift on there for me…they are all for other people I know who need gifts.

  338. Not sure if this really counts as doing something nice for someone else, but I’ve been on hospital bedrest for almost 3 weeks to make sure my twins aren’t born too early. They tried escaping the warm comforts of my womb a little too soon, so I’ve had to take it easy and stay in the hospital so that they could enjoy a few more weeks in my belly instead of the NICU. To me that seems like a nice thing to do for my babies.

    But I think my husband qualifies, since he’s been doing all the housework and getting the baby room cleaned out and ready for them while I’ve been in the hospital. Normally I take care of the household and all the bills, but for the last few weeks my husband has had to step up and take over. Which he has done without very little complaint so I can rest in the hospital, focus on the babies and not stress over the stuff I can’t do.

  339. i want a card please! so i recently saw my mom’s bucket list that she had hung on the fridge. sky diving was super close to the top, or it was at least the closest thing to the top that was actually possible. so my something nice to receive this card is getting my mom a spot on a plane and pushing her out of it. sounds rather fun as well as therapeutic! i hope i hope i hope i can pull this off for her!

  340. Thanks for all the laughs and great articles you’ve given us Jenny (and the llama, too). For Christmas, I’m only making handmade gifts, giving books, or donating to charities. And thanks to your suggestion, I just put in an order to Heifer (a shared Gift of a Knitter’s Basket for my knitting/crafty pals, a Promise Gift basket for my folks and fam, and a shared Gardener’s Gift Basket for my friends, teachers, and spiritual advisors who helped me grow), so I’m almost done.

    P.S. Does the llama have a name? If not, we really should get on that.

  341. Created a design to put on tshirts and if the goal is reached by the deadline (Friday) I’ll donate half of the money raised to Project Night Night. The other half
    will possibly be split between me and a friend whose family is having a hard time as well. Wish me luck!

  342. Well, I bought gifts for a family of five who moved to the Pacific Northwest from a city in the South (from Georgia) and their children had only windbreakers for warmth at a public holiday event. I picked up coats, hats, gloves, scarves for the kids as well as a sweater each, several toys a piece and some candy from See’s for the entire family.

    I couldn’t bear thinking of those kids in windbreakers in our very cold weather here. They were such good mannered kids and it was so damn cold out. Blankets they had along helped some but a coat at the time would have been much better. I wrapped everything and took them to the place they mentioned the father worked, and presented him with a stack of gifts for their family. He was shocked and completely surprised. I am glad I could do it for them.

  343. Didn’t see my favorite on that list, a direct insult – it’s pronounced “gay cocken offen yom” which means “go shit in the ocean” or sea or any sizable body of water.

    Really rolls right off the tongue.

  344. Recently, I helped renovate a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center with an organization called Serve the City. I’ll also be donating to Project Night Night and sharing it on Facebook.

  345. Recently I tried to post a screen shot of google search on “sending bees as a gift” as I now really want to, but you can only send Beer as a gift it would appear.

    This is a shame, and also an opportunity for a business.

    If I could be bothered to set up the business, I would send all the nice people who brag about doing good bees, as the point of charity is that….schhh, it’s a secret, otherwise its just boasting.

    I still want one of your cards, you can’t not send me one, as I might of given shed loads, or I might not have done, either way it’s none of your bloody business.

  346. My accidental good deed was complimenting a friend and another friend thought I was referring to her, so I did not bother to set the record straight. Yeah its December must get a tree!

  347. Well, what I’m doing to give back this year is pretty simple, and I sorta developed it out of laziness. Whenever I go out holiday shopping, I grab a toy, buy it and then stick it in the Toys for Tots box on my way out. Done and done. I’ve gotten dominoes, a dress up tiara with earrings, a little Cookie Monster in an airplane, a PlayDoh set, a couple of books, etc.

    Since I live in a small area, there aren’t many stores so the main ones I shop in all have a donation box. Cashiers have always been happy to answer when I ask if I can donate a toy or money or whatever at their business.

    None of the items were huge and it was never really expensive, but together they’ve added up faster than I expected. I will definitely be doing this next year, and highly recommend it. I’m already shopping, I don’t have to lug anything extra to my car and remember to take it somewhere, plus I live in a town with a lot of poor kids so I know it’s going to help.

    Plus there are a ton of other ways you can help without spending money. One thing I try to do year round is never to use the self check out machines. I always go to the cashiers, even if that means I have to wait a little while longer. I’ve been a cashier three different times in my life – they work hard for low wages. Waiting an extra couple of minutes helps ensure job security in my town.

    Whatever your situation is, I ask that you find some way to give back and help those around you. I think it’s so awesome that people who’ve been down on their luck in the past come back to donate, and I find it super inspiring! Happy Holidays everyone!

  348. OFF TOPIC (but has both Doctor Who and Sherlock)

    I wonder if this will help Jenny to cope with the last episode of Sherlock as a trigger?

    http : //shirt.woot.com/offers/how-he-survived

  349. Can we please get a ”For Christmas I bought you a big bag of angry bees. Happy holidays, asshole.” holiday card to go with our donations. HA! Tis the season of giving bees and perspective on your douchiness! It’s all about giving and giving the planet a bucket of angry bees in your honor has been a pleasure, douche canoe. (I am sensing an untapped industry of philonthropy and snarky greeting cards.) Thanks!

  350. Thanks for the link, Jenny. I sent an email to family members who participate in book clubs and recommended they give to Project Night Night instead of giving each other gifts this year. What a lovely charity!

  351. I’m pretty sure that if you’ve got a shot at (rightly) canonizing James Garfield with any Pope, it’s going to be this one. Did you see how he dresses up as a regular priest and sneaks out to help homeless people?! I mean, god damn, what a great guy!

    Donating to Project Night Night as soon as we have some funds (i.e., after my parents give us money for Christmas). Thanks for putting this together and giving all of us horrible people a good cause to work towards. You are a force of good, Ms. Lawson.

  352. About 5 years ago I got the idea to start a food and toy drive in our office for a local charity. The idea caught on and we now collect every year!

  353. Every year we donate to causes in lieu of gifts for those family members who we know appreciate the gesture. We donate a lot to food banks and animal shelters, ’cause we all need to eat! I tend to do it for birthday presents too. Makes me feel good, like the asshat I am, and makes the person whose name it was donated in feel superior. All-in-all, we all win!

  354. This year, I am giving to someone I know. I have a friend who basically broke her leg in half about six weeks or so ago. She’s roller derby skater so trust me, I am not exaggerating. Anyway, that took her out of work until the leg is not so broken. That meant she was hurting for Xmas presents for her kids. So, since my family isn’t, I gathered up a few things and am sending them to her kids, as well as a gift card for her and her wife to go out to dinner. It’s not a lot, but it’s more than they would have had without it. That’s my Christmas giving story. FYI, her kick ass derby name is Nacho Mama. I L-O-V-E this woman!!!

  355. the holidaze bring out the nice in us. we like to do fill a stocking- fill a heart. i also teach kindergarten, so i think that makes me extra nice on a daily basis. kids bring that “nice” out in us, too.

  356. Dear Jenny, this year I’ll be donating to a local group that provides kids who have “aged out” of foster care with the tools and guidance to keep them out of the streets and jail. it’s a great cause because more often than not, these kids are forgotten by the government and society as they are not “cute” anymore.
    Jenny, I wanted to thank you for serving as a guiding light for me about accepting yourself as you are and bring opened to the world about your inner struggles. Last year I quit my cushy and evil job to re-embrace my good self…. it turns out money may buy you a bit of happiness but it doesn’t buy you a cloak to hide your conscience… It’s been a year of amazing discoveries and by reaching out to friends far and wide to offer my story, I soon discovered that like you, everybody is fighting their own battles. I learned that by being vulnerable and open about my own journey, I helped others take charge of their own destiny, embrace their own self or at least giving them hope that it does get better. I’ve learned from you and definitely from myself, that while sometime laughter helps carry the daily burdens, it does an atrocious job of getting rid of them. Thank you again Jenny, may your shiny light keep inspiring others and make a better world because of it!
    Hugs,
    Me

  357. I realize that there are probably 395 people above me who feel this way and about 70 who’ll say it directly (guessing) and much as I hate caps lock for its shouting, YOU AREN’T SHITTY!! You’re awesome! Not only depression lies!

  358. Wonderful, Jenny! Absolutely wonderful! Perfect gift for my older sister. She’s decided she wants to live “off the grid” and just gives away anything nice we give her anyway. Why not skip the middle man?

  359. In my office instead of exchanging gifts with one another we choose a family in our community to buy christmas for. We pay their utility bills, grocery gift cards, cleaning supplies and clothes. But our favorite items to buy are toys for the kids. It’s so much more rewarding than exchanging (mostly useless) gifts with one another.

  360. Tomorrow I will be sending a gift card for $300 to a friend who is having a super shitty time in life lately, and is worried that she will not be able to buy gifts for her kids this year. She has had a serious run of bad luck, so I rallied 10 friends to pull together and help her out.

    Also, I lobbied to my mom to spend less on each of us this year, and donate the money, so she is spending $25 less per person and is adopting a bunch of families through her church. This giving shit feels good, yo.

  361. I actually just heard of Heifer the other day. I think Bill Gates wrote about it, he probably got the idea from you. It sounds like a wonderful charity that actually really does good. And Project Night Night just sounds awesome. Definitely going to donate to each of those. I have to admit, I got a bit teared up reading the posts about the past fundraisers. It shouldn’t surprise me but there’s not much better than spontaneous generosity. Thanks so much Jenny! you’ve created an amazing culture here.

  362. I always donate to charities when I can, though this year has been really tight for us so far.
    However, I DID invite my ex (you know, the one who filed for custody of my children and proceeded to spend the next 9 months in court annihilating my character as a woman and a mother) to have dinner with us (me, my husband and the kids) in my home on HIS birthday. We even put a candle in a dessert just for him, and sang the song. He was very appreciative, and even called me the next day to tell me so.
    I think that alone qualifies as me for sainthood. Or at least my good deed of the year.

  363. Awesome & inspired…was just trying to think what to get my parents (who have PLENTY) and decided they will receive a note about a gift in their name. Our school is collecting pajamas for foster kids, especially teens. Heading to buy some to donate in their name. The kids can pick them out so we can talk about all they have & how giving, even a little, makes a difference to those that receive. Thank you.

  364. I paid for the order of the person in front of me at the store because he couldn’t find his wallet/money. I know how that feels, and I’m currently in a position where covering someone’s order isn’t going to hurt my finances. I thought he was going to cry, so then I was going to cry, so I told him good night and left as quickly as possible to avoid the awkward.

  365. My students and I are buying gifts for an anonymous (since I don’t want the kids to know who it is) family in the area. They have three children and the mother cannot work because one of the children is mentally disabled. I feel like this really teaches my students how lucky they are at Christmas, and they get to help someone in the process.

  366. I received my Project Night Night email just the other day and will make a donation today. Thank you Jenny for letting us know about this great organization. And thank you for all of the generous things you do for so many!

  367. My son’s school is collecting gifts for the less fortunate this year, but with a twist. Instead of buying gifts for children, we are buying gifts that the children can give to their parents.

  368. I really like programs like Heifer!
    Thanks for reminding us that they are out there & that it’s the perfect gift for the person that has everything. Or, like a lot of people, just don’t NEED anything!

  369. I’m a newbie, but am thoroughly enjoying your blog. (and your book) This year our family is adopting a troop overseas (through Girl Scouts) and a Grandparent. I really like Project Night Night – so I’m thinking we’ll have to do that too. 🙂 Merry Hanukkah to you and yours. Chin up Jenny – you rock!

  370. I’m inviting my mother-in-law to our house for Christmas. That one single act of kindness should set me for the entire year.

  371. first and foremost, I freakin’ love you…. my friend Raffaela got me to read your book and it was awesome, so now we just STALK your blogg every day looking for something to laugh and talk about… ok, moving on…. this year my son’s school is asking for coats for the less fortunate kids and parents who cant afford them so i donated some coats, and my Mom has this friend who doesnt really have much and kept coming around with just a sweater, so I gave her one of my coats, i have extra ones, so its cool… every little bit helps i guess… anywho…….. that is my story…

  372. this year i decided that everyone in my office already had too much stuff and we’re so lucky so i convinced them to all donate instead. toys r us has a great program with toys for tots that if you pay off someone’s layaway toys r us will donate 200 dollars worth of gifts to toys for tots. they also have “shaq’s wish list” where you can buy stuff and have it sent directly to toys for tots too. we paid off 3 people’s layaways (someone’s getting a hot wheels bike under the tree!) and got lots of toys donated too 🙂 i posted it on facebook and a lot of my friends said they were going to head over to toys r us too. so awesome!

    i also did the salvation angel tree when i was visiting dallas last week. bought a whole bunch of stuff for a little girl.

    i always wish i could do more. but something is better than nothing and if i, like you, can at least inspire a few more people to help then it’s a win win. i’m so impressed with you and everything you do!

  373. Me and my two kids are buying toys to donate to their daycare’s toy drive next week 🙂 We will also be donating to Project NightNight!

  374. I agree with Joy, we need an angry bees card! That’s priceless!
    And can you pretty, pretty please make a “Depression Lies” coffee mug. There are some mornings that I need that message to be up in my face…with coffee.
    I totally love you, but not in a creepy, Single White Female kinda way. Thanks for making me laugh and for reminding me that I’m not the only one whose brain can be a total asshole.

  375. You are the bomb-diggity Jenny! Way to support so many causes. A great way to show people that no matter what we struggle with, whether emotional or physically crippling at times, there are great things we can do to make a difference in peoples lives!!!

  376. We always get the name of a teenage boy from our local DFACS office and get as many presents as possible. Last year the request was for a bike so he could get a job to buy shoes for his little sister. Amazing how little things can help so many. PS – I love the cards!!!

  377. Been a rough year–but I haven’t yet killed my husband, who deserves to be killed at least twice. That’s the nicest thing I can do for anyone–or at least him–right now!

    We had llamas in our neighborhood for a while. But they retired to North Carolina. Now it’s goats right across the street. And we don’t even live in the country.

  378. My brother committed suicide 8 years ago. Every year on his birthday (December 20th), I donate whatever I can to the National Suicide Prevention Hotline in his honor, so that, hopefully, I can keep someone else’s family from the pain and loss we’ve all suffered because of this. I don’t know if this counts because I don’t technically do it FOR the holidays, but it’s a tradition, and it’s near Christmas, so, yeah.

    http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

  379. It’s going to be a very quiet Christmas for my boys this year. Between broken bones and property taxes, we’ll be lucky to have anything under the tree at all. This year my three boys and I will be giving baked goodies to friends and family, and we’ll be making them together which is all I could ask for as a gift for myself. For others we’ll be donating clothing and gently used toys to the local goodwill as a way of giving back to those who have less than we do.

  380. I love Heifer. I’ve been giving flocks of ducks or trios of rabbits as gifts for several years now. I think Project Night Night sounds wonderful, too. So I’m in (and would love to receive a card from you!) When donating to either of these causes, is there a way to give The Bloggess credit? Or does just using the links in this post cover that?

  381. This year I organized Adopt-A-Soldier at work. When I was mailing our boxes at the post office, a woman stopped me and said thank you for doing Adopt-A-Soldier. She said her son got back from Afgahnistan (sp) this year and that the holidays are the worst part of being overseas. It warmed my heart 🙂

  382. Great. So I was all up in my own ass about how cool it was that yesterday after working an event with another girl the manager gave me 2 cookies and I gave her one thinking he was only giving them to me because I’m so awesome. turns out he gave her 2 cookies too so I took mine back but believe it still counts because I was willing to part with one of my cookies. Then i read the comment about the girl who donated to the Suicide Prevention Hotline because of her brother and felt like a huge jackass for writing about a stupid cookie but then I realized that every small gesture counts so I’m gonna leave the comment. My boyfriend ate my cookies anyway.

  383. Right now I’m trying to keep my sis-in-law and her husband sane since his dad died early this morning as well as keep another friend sane whose husband had a 10lb cancerous tumor ripped out of the cavity that is his chest on Monday. I’m a little stressed here, y’all…

  384. I just bought a goat from Heifer International. For two reasons this is awesome:
    #1. I just got a whole lot of Christmas shopping done all at once. Goats are more meaningful than socks. (the site lets you print your own donor cards.)
    #2. I’ll be sharing this exciting news with my husband this evening. I will leave out the part that the goat doesn’t actually get to come live with us until he looks like he might explode and/or ask for a divorce.

    If I win, the added bonus will be tricking my husband that I actually won James Garfield and that he should look into mounting brackets so James can be lovingly hung over our bed.

  385. i also wanted to post this charity that a friend of mine started: http://www.pillowsforpaws.com/

    they make toys and beds for shelter animals. it makes the animals feel more comfortable/ loved and they;ve found that pets with the things often get adopted sooner. so it’s a win win. i don’t have a crafty bone in my body but i donated supplies so other people can make the things. 🙂

  386. I bought a goat through AmFam for my very materialistic step mother’s Christmas gift this year. I recognize it is very passive aggressive to give a gift like this, but I am taking great joy in the anticipation of the look on her face when she realizes that if she complains she will look like a total ass-hat. Hee Hee.

  387. This is true.
    I spent all of my savings (thousands)
    to bring my dying friend’s sister here from the middle east to be with her one last time.
    I understand this is shameless.
    I really like the cards.

  388. Just donated two packages to Project Night Night AND my company will match with another two. It’s a great day.

  389. I donated to help save the teen homeless shelter in Seattle last night. Maybe today I’ll send some bees!

  390. I was just thinking about this program this morning! Donated! Thank you for making it so easy to spread a little holiday cheer.

  391. My workplace (a small college) has an annual Secret Santa thing that lasts for two weeks. You are required to buy at minimum of two surprises per week for your person, plus a large gift for the big luncheon/gift exchange/Secret Santa reveal party at the end. We also run a food pantry for needy college students.

    For the last two years, all I’ve heard from coworkers around Secret Santa time is how horrible their SS happens to be – buying them cheap or crappy gifts, not getting them what they wanted, how they’re not going to do this again next year because it’s a waste of time and they don’t get anything good anyway… and so on, and so forth.

    So this year I decided that henceforth, instead of blowing $100/year on an ungrateful coworker who already has everything they need, I’ll be spending $100/year on food to donate to the student pantry to provide meals to students who have had a $0 cafeteria account balance since midterms, have been surviving on whatever scraps of food they can scrounge from their friends, and who not only NEED the gift, but will also utilize and appreciate it.

    If every employee on this campus used their Secret Santa budget for food pantry donations instead, we wouldn’t have any hungry students anymore.

  392. Love these cards! And I’m 34 weeks pregnant so Christmas cards are the LAST thing on my list of priorities right now…

  393. And I didn’t say a nice thing I am doing for someone else. I’m growing a human. Does that count?

  394. I have actually laughed with a lizard, my daughter’s pet lizard, Hydra. She’s a blue tongued skink who is all kinds of awesome. I wanted to post a picture here of Hydra in the TARDIS hat that I knit but I don’t know how to post a picture. Or maybe I just can’t post a picture. Anyway, it’s on FB, so go look there in my photo section because IT’S TOTALLY TRUE.

  395. Does it count that I want to hug Kathy O major big time?

    No? Um, ok. I’m staying in a job I truly hate to get them through at least the end of the year because I like my staff so much I don’t want to throw them to the wolves. And trying not to be selfish about what I think I need as my dad goes through melanoma treatment and instead put my mom and his needs first. It sounds ridiculous, but that’s damn hard some days.

    It feels weird to tell anyone about the money I give to organizations, but I’m doing it anyway. Anything for you, James Garfield. I do a monthly automatic donation to Planned Parenthood and give to any friend running/walking/cycling for a cause.

  396. It’s actually pretty funny because this year I was planning on buying some bees for strangers in another country through Heifer International. I’m a beekeeper so I would actually welcome gifts of angry bees.
    I also buy some things for needy people through our church, so I guess that is good too.
    My husband is Catholic so I’ll have him put in a good word for you

  397. I LOVE LOVE LOVE (seriously love it a LOT) the idea of sending live bees. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
    I met a wounded Navy Seal over the weekend and I’m donating to his wounded warriors fund. I also donate money for the people at the homeless shelter so that they can have a good holiday dinner like the rest of us.
    Happy Holidays Bloggess!! Keep at it, we all love your blog!

  398. Every year our Sunday School and youth groups donate money to buy chickens, pigs, goats, and cows for Heifer International – it is such a great way to give back. And our Giving Tree at work helps get a gift for teens at risk – so many ways to help out there – I hope you far surpass your goal and that one day none of this will be needed. You do good work here girl – keep it up! And the laughs are an added bonus. Happy holidays to you all!!

  399. Thanks for being awesome.

    We are opening our home to a mama-friend and her two children for 6 weeks over the holidays. The house will be bursting at the seams with kids and festivities. Really it’s because she needs a fucking break from her own life.
    And, after a thorough house cleaning I donated some awesome high-quality stuff to Deacon’s Closet. DC is one of the last charities in town that dispenses items for free rather than resale like Goodwill.

  400. I’m loving the whole idea of ProjectNightNight and have donated so that 4 kids can receive gifts in honor of my 2 kids and their significant others. Thanks for this great idea!

  401. I rescued a 12 year old, medically needy black lab mix dog named Rex yesterday…..his former a-hole owners dumped him at the local animal control shelter one hour after they adopted a healthy, young puppy……

    If I can find out who they are I will be sending them the angry bees (right after I shake the bag like a bazillion times)….

    P.S. the Pope is so missing out on canonizing James Garfield…..I mean look at all the good deeds he’s done…..you could have a Saint in your home!

  402. I spent the fall crocheting scarves. I’d love to give them to people who need some extra warmth for the winter, but I haven’t found an organization to give them to yet. Ideas? I have 15 ready to go.

  403. My little sister has pretty serious anxiety and one of the things she likes to do when she’s having a bad day is curl up in a cozy blanket. I’m making her a big bright quilt so she has something to curl up in that someone who loves her made.

  404. Every year at this time, my husband and I give a ridiculous tip to a server at a restaurant. Like more than a 100% of our bill. And we don’t even skimp on what we’re eating/drinking (OK let’s be honest… mostly drinking) either, so they actually make enough money from us to hopefully make up for the assholes that stiffed them earlier in the night. It’s fun.

    Also it’s supposed to be anonymous but last year our server figured out who we were, and recognized us MONTHS later. Like, in July. Damn her good memory! 🙂

  405. “You know how every year we do some sort of fundraiser for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa in hopes of getting my taxidermied boar head canonized by the Pope?”

    Day already made. This is why I love this blog.

    I’m going back to read the rest of it now.

  406. I was very moved by this post and the hundreds of comments. I find it all too easy to sink into my own sadness, but I have been so fortunate that I feel guilty for not doing more. I do haul a food pantry trailer on a 100 mile round trip once a month with my truck and help load and unload the trailer and my truck. Some of your readers might want to check out their charities on Charity Navigator. Oxfam seems to have a much better rating than Heifer and does similar work. I am buying a grove of Moringa Trees at Oxfam this year.
    Thanks for bringing out our better natures.

  407. Thank you for the llamas 🙂

    A couple of weeks ago, my daughter said that, if I didn’t have any ideas about Christmas gifts for her, I could get her a goat. I told her that a goat wouldn’t tolerate her messy room. She handed me the World Vision catalog that was with the mail. I told her she wouldn’t actually receive a goat, that a needy person in a Third World country would get it. She said she realized this.

    I usually get my mother something from their catalog: goats one year, three little pigs another. I should find that catalog again…

  408. Aaaannnnddd, you’ve done it again Jenny! what a great post! I promise to check back and do some payin it forward as soon as I figure out how much money I have. I started doing random acts of kindness year round when I find myself with a touch extra cash, or if I get an idea. One was to make sure every shift at the fire dept had cookies. 3 Days of cookie deliveries followed. Just with a thank you for what you do. You make me so happy Jenny, I wish there was something more I could do for you….

  409. I read the rest of it, and you are completely right.

    Over the age of around 6, Christmas doesn’t feel like Christmas unless you are giving. For anyone in London, Kids Co’s Christmas appeal is a very worthy cause: http://www.kidsco.org.uk/

    They are a charity supporting very vulnerable children who arrange a special Christmas day celebration providing presents and food for 4,000 kids who would otherwise be on their own with no where safe to go.

  410. Well I’ve had a horrible year from not being able to leave my house due to idk why and very bad financial times. But in the last two months we have pulled out of the hole and I was able to help my sister with paying her rent after direct tv stole all of her money out of her account for not getting boxes… yea that makes no sense and my brother in law just had the same problem and we were able to help him out too. So hopefully I’m back on the track of being able to help people again. Merry Christmas

  411. My (rather large) family decided this year to forego gift giving amongst the adults and instead draw names for “gifts”. The gift being we donate to the recipient’s charity of choice. Also have been donating to the local food bank as much as I can…scary how many more folks need that help now!
    Trying to give a gift to myself and not giving into depression’s lies…..been having horrible dark thoughts which have been tougher and tougher to silence. Help!

  412. I do my best to donate toys to some local drives. I am aslo going to donate at least a package to Project Night Night.

  413. I don’t know how “good” this is, but my best friend and I are having our kids do chores for elderly or otherwise overwhelmed neighbors. We pay the kiddos $0.50-2.00 depending on the difficulty of the chore; on Christmas Eve we’re going to use that money to buy a bunch of fresh foods to donate for the local shelter’s Christmas dinner since they usually just get ancient canned stuff.

  414. Those scare quotes make me look a moron. I didn’t mean that my little system isn’t good, just that in the scheme of things it is also small and half-assed. Urgh.

  415. My daycare lady has taken in a 2-year-old girl because her mother is having a rough time providing for her. They needed help getting her clothes (she had only a few basic pieces) so I asked everyone I knew and ended up with 6 bags of clothes for her, thanks to my very generous co-worker. I also got her a stuffed animal because I figured everyone needs something to snuggle. I’m hoping I can get her more clothes and toys. Also Jenny, this made me think of you.

    http://www.pinterest.com/pin/352054895842537942/

  416. Last year I wanted to donate but I was fired a week before Thanksgiving which made helping others impossible. This year however I am working full time at a job I love so I gave to both Project nigh night and Heifer International not quite as much as I wanted to but that’s what next year for.

  417. I’m trying to raise money to help someone I know who just moved cross-country with her three daughters to get away from her abusive ex. She is still unemployed, so Christmas is going to be bleak for her girls if we can’t get this together. Unfortunately, I’m a terrible fundraiser to begin with, plus I’ve been really sick, so it isn’t going the way I’d like it to.

  418. You know, I don’t really do anything nice for anyone. I mean, I clean the house for my guy and I take really good care of my dog, but mostly I don’t do anything nice for anyone. I need to change that.

  419. I want to love heifer, and once gave bunnies and chicks in my godsons names as an Easter gift, but their propensity to make repeated solicitation calls in the middle of the work day make them a company I simply cannot support. Such a shame, as I love their mission.

    Will be giving to Project Night Night this week!

  420. My husband John and I used to select a boy and a girl from the Angel Tree program in San Antonio for the 13 years that we were together. Since he passed away in 2008, keeping this tradition alive also keeps my memories of him close during the holidays. Kudos for all you do to help others as well. HolidayHugs!

  421. I’m participating in the Artists for Disaster Relief silent auction blog hop, to benefit survivors of Typhoon Haiyan. The link is here, if anyone is interested in bidding: http://mamamuzzle.com/?p=268

    We also always do food drive donations and Toys for Tots. I grew up poor, but never so poor that we couldn’t have Christmas, and I can’t imagine how rough it must be, not just to be a kid who gets left out of everything, but to be a parent who can’t afford a holiday celebration. I can’t help everyone, but I do what I can.

  422. Our neighbors are having hard times, so we’re providing a winter coat for their 10 year old son and curtains for their windows. We’re also providing Christmas for my brothers kids. We feel blessed to be able to help this year.

  423. You have the best collection of greeting cards EVER. But I have to ask why you don’t arrange to give 1,427 small children to the oxen? Fair is fair.

  424. Im not a fan of Christmas but you got me thinking maybe if I volunteer time or make donations in others’ names, it may be less consumerish. And piss off people who wanted a real gift! Two parties win, and the greedy “what? a donation in my name?!” Person loses, and I win again!

  425. I don’t have much extra cash at this point but I’m making a point of doing something nice for someone at least once a day. Some examples of nice things to do for someone that doesn’t ding your budget: Letting someone merge in traffic, opening a door for someone with a smile, wiping the rain off of the handle of two carts at the grocery store (one for me one for the next person), offering to return the grocery cart to the store for someone who’s just loaded their car, the list goes on and on. Every little bit can help.

    Thanks for being the best Bloggess out there, you’re fantabulous!

  426. @Missicat: you’re not alone in this. I’ve been dealing with the postpartum depression demons for the past eight months, and I feel like it’s making me less of a human, and definitely not the kind of person or mother I want to be. I just have to keep telling myself that it will pass, and I am not defined by my struggles. Meanwhile, I work on not taking it out on myself or those around me. You’ll see the other side of this spell eventually. Hang in there.

  427. Thank you for always being an awesome lady and inspiring others to be generous. I’ve just donated, sorry I couldn’t afford a whole night night bag, but hopefully the little I could give will help towards such a great cause anyway.

  428. Well that boar head photo makes me think I should come up with a better Christmas card idea.

    As for my good thing, hm, we did adopt a second cat last week. He’ll be spending Christmas home with us instead of alone at the shelter.

  429. Thanks for telling me about Heifer. I bought my cousin a llama for Christmas. Boy, will he be relieved that someone on another continent is responsible for feeding it and cleaning up the poop. He’s gonna love this gift!

  430. I’m going to spread the word on this! Nice things I do: for the last 3 years, I organize the office Secret Santa, and gather money to get something nice for our building’s maintenance man. I also bring in homemade cookies at least weekly, sometimes 2-3x/weekly. It’s insane. Maybe that’s actually not nice, because I bring in baked goods a lot all year, and I’m pretty sure at least half my team is on a diet now because of me. Oops?

  431. Each year I work with my kids schools and get the name of a child (or 3) and sponsor that kid through Christmas. Its shopping…with a cause!

  432. I’m letting my father-in-law live with us for an indefinite amount of time. That’s nice, right? I’m pretending he’s practice for when we adopt a baby, because he sleeps a lot, leaves his stuff lying around the house and insults my cooking.

    Also, I volunteer for the Red Cross helping arrange rides for indigent people to their medical appointments. And later this month, I’m going to help with an area “Shop with a Cop” program. Not that I’m a cop or anything. Actually, I used to be a public defender, so I’m sort of their enemy. But their female adults:female children ratio isn’t that great, so I’ve been told I can tag along with a cop and help with girly stuff (whatever that is). Plus, maybe I can give a civil rights lecture while I’m at it. Just kidding about the civil rights bit, I think it’s wonderful to provide a positive police interaction for kids, all while helping them have a good Christmas, and I wouldn’t rain on that for anything in the world. I’ll save the lectures for court. Oh, and I will probably be fixing a meal or two (or twelve) for some families in our church who have loved ones undergoing serious medical issues. Hopefully, they won’t insult my cooking.

  433. I try to pay some of my student’s bills secretly. I teach at a community college, and I know a lot of my students have hit hard times. We have move recently so I haven’t been able to this semester, but I am looking forward to doing it again soon!

  434. It’s so nice to see all of the nice things people do.

    We are kind of like secret Santas throughout the year to a lot of people and animals. We don’t really talk about the stuff we do because we feel weird talking about it…and that just might be us being weird. Not like clown weird though.

    Have a great holiday. God bless you and everyone who is commenting and doing great things.

  435. I’m baking 12 dozen cookies for my co-workers this weekend even though I’m pretty much pissed at all of them. The Husband said to make them with laxatives. Wouldn’t that be hilarious? But, I’m nice, so I won’t do that. Merry Christmas Fuckers.

  436. Hi there Jenny and Hailey and Victor and…I can’t run the list- you have too many creatures with given names.
    I’ll do a Texas and say Hey Y’All at ……..’s House!!!
    This past week I was going to spend my notreallydisposable paycheck on a badly needed set of tires WITH STUDS!! I have to do a shit-ton of driving every week, and I have been brave in the winter here in Maine in past years- or I just stay home and work if the snow is above 6″ or so.
    I digress. My employer wrote me a nice sized check toward the Gnarly Tirez. unsolicited.
    So I took my paycheck muneez- less a bit for Xmas Gifties- and sent it to the 3 local foodbanks that are having a BitchSlap winter because our Gov and DHS have slashed funding. Keep people warm and fed.

  437. This year my best friend said she wanted love and affection so im giving her some candy that is labeled “LOVE” and “AFFECTION”

  438. I am a student and can’t afford to give money to anyone. So I’m volunteering! I’m now a fully fledged volunteer with the National Autistic Society in the UK 😀 Although I guess it’s not just for Christmas because I committed to a minimum of a year, so I don’t know if it counts…

  439. My daughter’s school sponsors families at this time of year. Each grade brings in one item for one specific meal; ours is breakfast. We were asked to bring one item, like pancake mix or oatmeal.

    I’m taking in enough for every family sponsored, not just what we’ve been asked for, and sending warm mittens and hats along as well. It gets cold up here.

  440. I considered poisoned cards, but decided instead to get my colleagues to ‘adopt-a-family’ for our local family and children’s services – and that went over so well, we did another one from my family too. Plus I paid for the guy behind me in the drive-thru line at Tim Horton’s (It’s Canada, we take our Tim Horton’s very seriously)

  441. Well, what have I/we done for others this year. We supported the medical community to the tune of $15,000 or close to it. But, seriously, we’ve made donations to Salvation Army, Philippines Typhoon relief, our local food pantry, and to save an old clock in our small town. Next, we just finished buying gifts for a needy family. Oh, and I’ve asked for donations to Heifer as my Christmas list, along with your book. Two years ago, I got the Bees from heifer, my daughter painted me a picture of bees coming out of a hive to let me know what animal she chose. Also, it was going to be her college mascot, so it worked on two levels.

    Happy Hanukkah and Merry Christmas.

  442. I love getting into the holiday spirit and doing good for others is just a small part of it – along with all the great food, lots of chocolate and totally awesome gifts.

  443. I really wish our budget allowed for us to donate anything to anyone. The best i can manage is volunteering with my DD’s Girl Scout troop.

  444. I’m doing my bit for mankind this year by NOT spending Christmas with my family. Last time there was parental foot stamping and yelling at everyone to shut up (nice one Grandma), screaming and extremely poorly behaved kids (not mine), bell ringing to gain attention, temper tantrums, harming of small animals, much eye-rolling, inconsiderate gift giving or complete lack of bothering to purchase gifts at all, and a very hasty depature by me.

  445. We gave everything extra we had to my bro and sis-in-law for their family so they can afford to see some genetic specialists across the country for my niece. They don’t know it yet, but their stockings will be extra snug this year as we hit up a lot of friends and family to help send them to the national conference for kids with CDLS (Corelia deLang Syndrome). My niece was chosen to be the national “spoken girl” of the conference, but it’s not a paid for trip. They get to see the specialists for free once they can GET to California and pay entrance fee to the conference, but to get there is quite expensive. Instead of our normal giving to the Salvation Army and Angel trees around town, we gave to our family so they can see the doctors they need to. Win-Win really- I love my niece very much and am excited she might meet others with the same disorder. Nothing like seeing the happiness up close and personal!

  446. We do angel trees at the kids school. The school chose 7 needy families this year and our family is getting two sweaters for the parents in family 6…..we’re also getting tinfoil and a bag of oatmeal to put in their holiday baskets….it’s not much, but it’s at least something.

  447. I am renting out my hats in exchange for donations to charities that benefit women and girls. It’s called “Hats for Hire: Fabulous Fascinators and Chapeaux for Charity”. This turns my hat problem into a good cause. I have a lot of hats.

  448. My friend Trish and I reached out to the local YWCA and they set us up with a 7 year old who has been removed from her home twice this year. She’s at a shelter now with her mom and we’re told will be beside herself to receive her just like me American Girl doll under the tree!!!

  449. I decided to send a gift card (anonymously) to a girl I went to high school with 16 years ago.We are not real close, but live in a small town. I know things are tough for her and know matter how shitty I think my day is I know I am blessed. She works hard and I think at least it gave her a smile for a few minutes.

  450. My family is all grownups and not a one of us needs anything for Christmas, so this year, I picked out a toy that reminded me of each member of my family (Playmobil Ski Boat representing my Uncle, etc), I’ll take a photo of each item for the faux-recipient, and then donate every last thing to Toys for Tots (to honor my brother, a Marine). My family will get a photo of “their” toy, and a note of explanation. I’m hoping to make it an annual tradition!

  451. We’re doing a toy gift exchange at work, and then donating all the toys to a local non-profit. We’ll also be donating some canned goods to the food bank. And I bought a Project NightNight package, because what they do is amazing. Merry Christmas to you, Jenny & James Garfield!

  452. This year we bought presents for homeless teens and organized a fundraiser for kids who lost a lot in our town during the floods this fall. I love what you’re doing, and I always read you before bed so I can laugh before I fall asleep and not give myself cancer in my head instead.

  453. A middle-aged couple were in my apartment complex (which isn’t that close to major streets) two days ago and told me in an embarrassed way that their car had broken down and they needed to get back home a couple counties over and therefore needed $40 for two bus tickets. They said they had been wandering around and hadn’t been able to get help from the police or other people they had tried. My intuition was that they were telling the truth, and I happened to have $40 in cash. They said they would pay me back by check, so that’s cool, but if they don’t I’m not too worried about it. Also they helped me get my groceries upstairs, which I have sometimes had difficulty with due to some back trouble. So as you say Jenny, *everyone wins*.

  454. I stopped sending Christmas cards years ago, partly because I’m too bloody lazy to buy, write & send them but also because it’s such an expensive, wasteful exercise. Instead I buy trees or goats or chickens, whatever is needed to get up to around £50/$80 and email everyone to say, “Hi, I’m a cheapskate, your card is keeping some poor sucker in Africa/India/Somewhere alive. Merry Christmas”.

    Not a single negative comment in all these years and mostly people just saying “I wish I could do that.” It’s not difficult. Just do it.

  455. I bought and packed welcome kits for men who come to Canada (Niagara region) to work in the orchards here.

  456. Done… I did a charity walk in October for which I needed to make a contribution to a charity of my choice, And this one fits the bill nicely, nicely, thank you very much!

  457. I made a mad dash to IKEA last night and heard that IKEA is donating $1 for every plush toy sold from now until Christmas. So I got my Toys For Tots stuffie there as well as the towels I went for.

    (I got strange looks 50 simple cotton flat-weave towels…So if you were there and saw me, don’t worry, it’s just supplies for a PTO holiday craft fair! Although I plan on keeping the leftovers, so there may be a husband yelling about towels in my future. If that happens, I’m ordering him a big metal chicken.)

  458. Did you SEE the Texas ‘charity’ that built a gingerbread house so big that it could have fed all the homeless in the city and yet the food will end up feeding pigs?? Did you seeeeeeeeeee it Jenny?? (The link is on my blog if you didn’t see it and dear gods)

    For the holidays this year I’m donating baby stuff to the local women’s shelter.

  459. i am a going to be bringing a tray of christmas cookies, a basket of clementine tangos from our tree and a box of coffee to go from starbucks to the homeless community at a local park on christmas eve. i always feel a wee bit self-conscious (i just spent about 5 minutes trying to find conscious in the dictionary to know how to spell it!) when i have a $4.00 starbucks in my hand and i see someone who doesn’t have enough money to eat, let alone buy a cup of designer coffee. so let them have starbucks…. and some homemade christmas cookies to go with it.

  460. After a truly sucky week at work, it was such a wonderful feeling to come back and read more comments. Like a great big giant group hug, without the awkwardness. Thanks to all for restoring (at least a bit) my faith in humanity, or at least those of us who have the sense to read this blog.

    Forgot to add before that I’m an angel tree giver too. My angel child wants a Barbie “and a big siren”. Yikes. For the sake of the sanity of those in her household, she will be getting Barbie and a bunch of other gifts, but alas, no siren. (I have children of my own and I will never forgive their uncle for giving them the drum set.)

  461. My awesome cousin has a Christmastime bday and she is collecting water for a charity that is getting clean water to people in Africa in lieu of gifts – so we helped her out with that and it was GREAT. We also had some horrible flooding here in Austin over Halloween and tons of people are still homeless from that, so our family is also donating to help those folks. I guess we have water themed donations this year. Plus the normal stuff we do (habitat for humanity, local food bank, and angel tree) I’m off to check off your links now – thanks!

  462. My coworkers and I are collecting money to provide a Christmas tree, holiday dinner, gifts and much-needed funds for the family of a 4-year-old girl who is a “frequent flier” in our pediatric and oncology departments. Her mom and brother have had to sacrifice a lot to pay for her medical care, and the girl obviously got a bum deal health-wise. This is the least we can do.

  463. What a wonderful idea to organize charitable giving through your blog. I love Heifer International. It’s a great charity though when I first heard of it, I thought it was a support group for large women like me. (Hello. My name is Molly and I am a heifer. Hello Molly.) Hope you raise buckets of cash for these wonderful causes. Happy holidays to you and your family.

  464. My brother was an electrician, but with the economy being shitty and all he was out of work for a LONG time. And even tho he waited on the Unions list nothing happened (for almost 2 years). Then one day he decided to go back to school and become a programmer – since he now has to eat top ramen everyday…my boyfriend and I decided to donate money to my brother. We sent him $$ to help him out as he is struggling in school (with really hard classes) and working part time. Even tho I’m not working either. Sometimes you just have to roll up the sleeves and cinch the belt a little tighter to help out others. And it doesn’t always have to be a stranger – could be family or friends.

  465. Wish I had gotten to this post earlier (been away from the ‘puter for several days). I will be donating only one Project Night Night this year (dammit), because I already shot a wad over on MODG’s site for WANA (We are Not Assholes). I will calendar this for next year, ’cause I think it’s the bomb. So are you.

  466. Donating to this wonderful project – thank you for getting the word out Jenny!

    Honestly, the nicest thing I’m doing this holiday season is for myself – I’m taking the steps to get out of a bad marriage and move on with my life.

  467. I had written about an acquaintance (a client, I can be honest here I suppose) who has pancreatic cancer and is the sole worker in her family; she cares for her grandchildren, has been raising them since they were tiny. I decided to forego any charity that caught my eye at this time of year (even the Salvation Army kettle), and not give a dime to anyone who wasn’t her. I’ll be scraping up what I can and sending her cash (I’m pretty sure my employer would not like to know that I’m giving something to a client; our office donates as an office to clients but I don’t think we’re supposed to be giving stuff and getting credit for it ourselves). This, after a car repair I didn’t anticipate (To a coworker: “Fucking shit, it’s costing me $520 to get this fucker inspected, I expected like $150 or something.” Coworker: “Well, at least you don’t have a car payment, that’s the worst.” Me: *silent pause.* “I DO have a fucking car payment! It’s the worst of the fucking WORST!!!” Ah, fuck me– at least I have a car.)…

  468. I am spending all month compiling a book chronicling my dad’s life as his Christmas present. It sounds nice but honestly there will be some snide remarks thrown in there for color.

  469. This year I plan on helping my Dad with Christmas gifts for my mom and brother since I know things are super tight money-wise right now. He’s a stubborn and proud man though, so I may have to drug/knock him out first to do so. It’s legal to do that if it’s for a good cause though, right?

    It may seem minor compared to what others are able to do, but this is the first year I’ve ever been able to really help out since things got bad for us.

  470. A little late, but I just dropped off a meal for my friend and her family. She has stage 3b breast cancer, but She has 3 kids so leaving this planet is not allowed. I also packed some stickers and cocoa for the kids, along with some Emergen-C for the whole family to chug so they don’t get sick.

    If anyone wants to know how to coordinate food for people: there is this great site called http://www.takethemameal.com

  471. I donated last year… and again this year.. Its awesome doing something good. Since I’m already going to hell – this just means I’ll be holding the door open, not sitting next to the big guy!

    This year – my office is lacking any holiday cheer… so I decided to start “Cheering” people. Kind of like “ghosting” or “boo’ing” at Halloween…. Leaving a little bit of candy canes to spread holiday cheer.. I nice way to brighten up someone’s day!

  472. Last year I couldn’t afford/didn’t know what to get presents for my family, so I donated to project Night Night and people loved it! I love the causes you share on your blog!
    I’m in no shape to help out with donating this year (no jobby = no worky = no money) and it breaks my heart knowing all the wonderful causes I CAN’T help right now, so I’m so glad you do so much good, Jenny.
    You too are worth ALL the llamas.

  473. I donated and posted Project Night Night on my FB. I’m glad I have the means to do this.

  474. My good deed is taking care of my father-in-law in Australia while my husband is in the US (due to his job). I love your donation ideas, thanks. James Garfield is always great in his holiday gear, and my favorite Yiddish curse is #26. Merry Christmas!

  475. I don’t want to sound all braggy, but I survived the a week long bout of the flu with all 4 of my kids & they were still around to celebrate Thanksgiving 😉

  476. Normally I wouldn’t comment on something I’m doing for someone else, but when you offer the chance at James Garfield cards, I can’t pass it up. So I’m giving a holiday party and everyone who comes will bring either warm clothing for our local homeless shelter, or food for the food bank to distribute to needy people in our town. And then I’ll deliver it all next week. I’m practically Mother Teresa.

  477. At my work we always sponsor a needy family. It breaks my heart, kids asking for socks, gloves, & pj’s. That’s what they need the most.
    But what’s more heartbreaking, is that a lot of people I work with pay NO attention to it. Yes, I know times are tough, but give a dollar, 5 dollars, something!
    So I always give some money, or sometimes money and also something off their wish list. And the people running it are always like: You bought a gift, you’re giving money too? Sad that they are surprised and really sad that more people don’t help when they can. Give up your coffee on your break, and give that dollar to a child who wants socks under their Christmas tree.

  478. Jenny, every time I catch up on your blog I tell myself I won’t get behind on it again. Then life shits on me and I kill my computer and lose both my and my husband’s job all at the same time. I managed to catch up on my phone tonight though (only 8 months worth this time). I laughed, I cried a little, I did a bit of WTF-ing. Don’t change, please. You are just amazing, weird medical shit and taxidermied friends and cats and all.

  479. My husband and I were just talking about our end-of-year donations.
    This year’s list is:
    — Wikipedia (freedom of information is IMPORTANT, folks)
    — Planned Parenthood
    — Planned Parenthood (I know they’re on here twice, but it’s been a shitty year for people with the equipment to get pregnant in this country)
    — The Wildlife Conservation Society (I will be GODDAMNED if I let elephants go extinct before I have grandkids I can take to the zoo)
    — and finally– this is a direct quote from my list– “Whatever crazy shit James Garfield is endorsing for Christmas”

    So, I’m in. And you and James Garfield are in good company.

  480. Amazing post as always! I definitely think ccing the Pope is an awesome idea. It got me thinking. Why don’t we hear about what the vatican is doing for charity each year/Christmas? (I remembered that the Pope is on twitter, I need to check it out to further investigate the issue) Am I to busy with my life (yeah, I probably am… but still…) that I did not caught the news about the awesome charity events the vatican is supporting? It just seems wrong not to know. Lead by example and all…

  481. A nice thing that I’m doing is…umm…crap, there’s got to be something. I’m…I’m a horrible person aren’t I? I…I clean the rat cage…sometimes. Darn it, don’t make me think of what a horrible person I am!

  482. My best friend was recently fired from her job because one of the owners was bullying her and she filed a complaint. She is a beauty therapist but has.always wanted to do makeup artistry so, for christmas, I’m getting her a one day Mac course to start her out!
    Love the project Jenny and I shall be donating!

  483. I’ll come up with a nice thing to do as soon as I’ve moved my house. So hopefully next week. In the meantime, I’d take some bees, but it is FUCKING COLD here in Colorado right now and they’d just die and I don’t want to have to deal with a ton of dead bees in my yard. Then again, maybe scaring the new neighbors right off the bat with a yard full of dead bees will just make any future weirdness look better by comparison.

  484. A few of us at work sponsor Christmas gifts for some kids through a local social services organization. This year was two older boys. They give a couple of sentences about the kids and what they’re asking for for Christmas, and one of them said something like “J. Is 17 and Is ding much better in school this year. He’d like gift cards to the music store or the mall, and some gloves and a hat. This is J’s last year to receive gifts through this program.” this made me cry, thinking of this poor kid, who will still be a kid next year but may not get anything for Christmas.
    We also do Toys-For-Tots through the community service club at my daughters school. It is good for these kids who have so much to think about those who are so much less fortunate than they are.
    The budget is tight this year, but come payday I can donate to project Night Night.
    Thanks for spreading the word!!

  485. Love giving back at the holiday season. You’re awesome. I don’t have a lot of money but I do always find some way to give back. A local human society in my county took in 12 horrifically abused dogs (I won’t go into detail). I sent them $50. Not much, but I know it can be used. I also sent a box of small Christmas presents to my online friend. She’s a single mom who works three jobs and couldn’t afford much of anything for her two year old for Christmas. I sent her a couple toys, crayons, play dough, a few books, and I sent a necklace for her. I know she will appreciate it so much.

  486. I just visited Project Night Night. Hope it makes a kid happy. Some James Garfield cards would make me happy.

  487. For the past few months my kids have saved their allowance to buy a present to put in the bin at one of the stores here for a needy child. I told them that I will match what they have saved to get a few really fun presents.

  488. Thanks for putting good out into the world! My family is joining our church’s red bag giving. We’re collectively providing 500 gift bags to kids in India (a team is there distributing now!) and also giving gift bags to all the K-2 kids at 2 low-income local elementary schools. It’s so fun to just let kids know they’re thought of and loved!

  489. I like your blog, but I am put off by the profanity.

    (I can appreciate that, but they are inextricably linked. It gets easier when you get used to it. Probably. ~ Jenny)

  490. I’m trying to pull together some stuff for a co-worker who had fallen on hard times and is now getting back on her feet. Plus, donating extra blankets to the homeless shelter.

  491. I would love to have a James Garfield card sent to me!! As someone who is broke as a joke, here are a few things I am doing this season to attempt to give back that involve little money:

    1) donating the mop that is currently my hair to a local women’s center for cancer
    2) driving to Arlington National Cemetery with my sister’s “For Our Troops” student group to lay wreathes at the graves of fallen soldiers, including my high school boyfriend. It will be the first time I have gone to see him there. I am probably going to have a break down! Yay!
    3) donated canned goods to the Maryland Food Bank
    4) donating old towels and sheets to the local animal shelter

    Jenny, thank you for making me smile every day and for all of the good you have done over the last few years!!!

  492. Thank you for being you, Jenny.
    I was having a pretty emotional day today, then I read: ”For Christmas I bought you a big bag of angry bees. Happy holidays, asshole.” and I laughed for the first time in a couple days. 🙂

    If I can, I will donate this year. I will certainly help spread the word.

  493. I am really happy to read all the pppppppses. . .(not sure how many ps to add there) but it is great news. Happy Angry Bees

  494. That is awesome! We just trudged through snow to buy a ton of gifts for the local homeless shelter – they have a big holiday party for homeless and underprivileged kids and they were low on toys this year. That was so much fun!

    I plan to send angry bees to relatives after the next paycheck. Best gift idea EVER.

  495. I love the people that follow you. (I love you too but that’s a given.) Such generous people. It makes my heart swell.

  496. I do nice stuff all year round, except for in December because I don’t like Christmas. December is for me hiding out from all the tra-la-la stuff. I am going to leave a Tim Horton’s gift card out for my garbage man though, because he came back around & picked up my trash after I put it out really late. That’s all I got.

  497. I always love reading about everyone’s favorite ways to give. But then I get conflicted and can’t figure out which ones to donate to. I wish I had enough to donate to all of them!

    I think this year it will be one Project Night Night bag and one bag of goodies to our local Children’s Home, which takes care of kids that have been pulled out of bad homes or whose parents became incarcerated and they had no where else to go.

  498. My nice thing was to forget my cash back at the grocery store this morning. I hope the person who found it needed it more than I do! May they pay it forward.

  499. I love that you are always helping people (including random people who tweet you DMs because they don’t know what to say to their daughter to help, so thanks again). Our town (and has spread out from here) has been doing acts of kindness for the last 4 months in honor of one of our own who lost his 9 yr old son in an accident: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Actsofkindnessforderek/1407255679486667 In addition to random things, I’ve been doing (paying for the car behind me, and such) — every year my children and I use the World Vision catalog and donate $100 to help out the less fortunate. It’s one of my favorite Christmas gifts. (Which reminds me that I need to get writing a letter to my sponsored kid also. And maybe get around to ordering Christmas cards so I can send one to her and her family)

  500. I wish more than anything that we could afford to donate but with 3 kids that we’re already scraping to buy for and an emergency move that had to happen last month, we just can’t do it. I’m really glad that you’re doing this for everyone though! My heart breaks when I think about little kids who aren’t getting Christmas or have beds or homes or food. It’s so sad. I’m grateful for what we have, even if it isn’t much right now. Merry Christmas! 🙂

  501. Huzzah, that’s awesome! I work at a psych hospital which means that starting in September of every year I start harassing all the local restaurants and businesses to give towards our patients’ holiday experience. I just scored a massive donation of spinach artichoke dip for the day of thei Christmas party– or, as many of them called it last year, “that amazing green shit.”

  502. The new pope would love James Garfield.

    A group of people I know and I are all adopting a family of seven who had their house destroyed by the tornadoes that hit Illinois (probably 40 minutes from where I live), we’re getting them Christmas presents and making them a bunch of freezer meals, while they in a temporary shelter and try to rebuild their lives.

    Maybe we should send them some angry bees. Or oxen. That would help, right?

  503. This summer we adopted three ferrets from a ferret shelter, not the first time and surely won’t be the last. Our house just isn’t complete with those little balls of chaos running amok and making our cats’ lives a little more interesting! Anyway, the shelter is run by amazing folks and has amazing volunteers. For Christmas we are (not so) secret santas to three ferrets at the shelter who don’t yet have forever homes, one for each of our ferrets. Which means I get to pick out a ridiculous amount of ferret toys and stuff! And we’ll make a donation in the name of each ferret too, because vet bills sure aren’t cheap, especially when no good SOBs drop off their ferrets just because they are old or sick.

  504. My son and I are going through his toys before Christmas and donating the ones he’s outgrown to go to the local women’s refuge. Don’t have much spare cash but can give goods we don’t need any more.

  505. Oh man, that picture of the kid holding the stuffed dog killed me. How could I not donate seeing how happy he is.
    I love the bee idea. I think I will donate and name all my ex-boyfriends! haha.

  506. I’m not sure it’s a super nice thing but I’m hanging out with my grandmother every week. My grandpa has Alzheimer’s and she needs someone to talk to, so I do what I can. It helps that I’m the unemployed one with a lot of time that I can spend with her.

  507. This makes me so happy! We are annual Heifer donors and my favorite thing about it is that my kids LOVE picking the animals. They often have a hard time letting go of their old toys and clothes, and donating things in general, but bees? chickens? pigs? for people who will take good care of them? Yeah, they can do that.

  508. I recently found out that a co-worker was about to start treatment for breast cancer, so I knit her a hat from my bestest, softest yarn because January is a shitty time to not have any hair. And I’m doing the giving tree at work. There is a six-year-old girl about to get her body weight in art supplies, and an eight-year-old boy getting the equivalent in books.

  509. We love giving heifer animals as presents! Yay Jenny! And I’m a sucker for anything with kids and night night in the name! Yay Jenny!! Yay James Garfield! Yay ‘Murcia!!

  510. I am completely not organized enough to buy Christmas bees yet, but I did get books for a boy (3 years old, wanted “books with dogs”) for our school’s giving tree already. And I took cups of hot coffee out to the natural gas line repairmen who have been working outside our house in 23 degree (+ 20 mph cold east wind!) Not quite as cool as buying a camel but it’s the best I could do today.

  511. Thanks to James Garfield and his inspiring example, since 2011 my sister and I give to Project Night Night in honor of my mom, a retired teacher. And as an urban homesteader, I always give myself the gift of a Heifer animal. This year was the Flock of Hope in honor of my own three extremely dumb chickens. Thanks for the inspiration, and I look forward to the inevitable James Garfield animated Christmas special.

  512. I love that it took 36 flicks of my thumb to get to the bottom of the comments. And I have a phablet for Pete’s sake. You have made such a huge impact on the world, Jenny, and even though we’ve never met, I love you. Thanks.

  513. Ah sorry, I can’t donate this year, I blew my cash on buying a foster kid a game system. If anyone is interested in helping out foster kids who, let’s face it, don’t always get great stuff either you can look up One Simple Wish.

  514. Jenny, you rock!
    My husband and I make a competition to see who can take their giving allotment (usually a healthy chunk of the Dec commission check) and get the most toys for Toys for Tots, without going over…too much. We always go over. We then spend our time at whatever store talking about how our kids are going to love the multiple cartloads of toys, just to get dirty looks. One lady lectured us about spoiled children one year. 🙂

  515. I’d love one of your cards! I’m broke as shit, so all I’ve been able to do is share the project Night night page on facebook and I was thankfully able to buy a small tricycle for my 2 year old so he has a present this year. I’m doing what I can. 🙂

  516. When I go to the store if I can I get hot chocolate for the holiday bell ringer :o)

  517. Just donated to Project Night Night in the name of my niece and her husband, Heifer.org for my other niece and nephew (Hope Basket), my brother and his partner (a pig – don’t ask) and my other brother and his wife (healthy home)

  518. My really nice thing is keeping all the terrible things I want to say to my MIL to myself. Can that count? I’m weaning off medication for anxiety, about to have a hysterectomy and generally feel pretty crappy now. And she really deserves to be told off, so keeping it in is a huge gift. I’m also going to share Project Night Night with my friends. What a great gift idea!

  519. When my “supervisor” in the corporate office for my department came in and got something printed and left without paying(his excuse was, “I work with you for this company, I don’t pay.”) I paid what he owed to our store so we wouldn’t take a loss. As a worker in the store, we pay for everything as if we were a regular customer. I let him leave and paid out of pocket for what he should have paid for himself.

  520. Oh, I also forgot to mention in my rant that I also have been donating school supplies to my old high school. The librarian sells the supplies to kids for 25 cents and whatnot, but it’s the best she can do to try to get more books in the library, since they don’t give her any money to do so.
    This is commonplace around here. The libraries only get money if someone elects to donate it to the library and not the sports teams..which is rare.
    She’s also selling coffee and hot chocolate for $2 a cup, but of course, it’s not adding up to very many books for the kids. People will donate books, but if it’s not the heavy-duty “library edition” that can stand up to being passed around all year, it usually gets retired within a couple months due to the damage.

  521. We must have had twin minds today, because I just ordered my second annual Heifer donation gifts in honor of family and friends. And, a hive of bees was one of the donations I chose, along with bunnies and chickens and sheep and alpacas and llamas and veggies. Oh, and we’re sending a girl to school. I love the Heifer Organization. Thanks for sharing it with your awesome readers!

  522. My husband and I love Heifer … and as beekeepers, we always give bees. (And then give little jars of honey to the honorees. Kind of like, “We got you some bees but sent ’em to somebody else because we thought you’d rather just have some honey.”)

  523. Just a thought, but maybe a sidebar ad for angry bee hate gifts and gifts for needy kids might be in order. 🙂

  524. Every year we give donations to the food bank (I put something in the bin every time we buy groceries) and but as many “decent” toys as we can for $150 from our local dollar store to donate to Toy Mountain (why buy a couple expensive things when you can give give give to children who will never care how much it cost??) then when we send our holiday cards we tell each recipient which toy we donated on their behalf. We also give a little to our local mission and animal shelter. Now I’m adding these two worthy causes to the list, thank you for sharing such great ideas!! I am my happiest self when giving to those who need a helping hand! Tis the season!!

  525. While I am not able this year to afford to send in money for the charities you are raising funds for I am doing something I am very excited to do. This year, I am making pretty ruffle scarves for all the ladies that live and receive support from our local woman’s shelter for abused women.

  526. Donated. Even though its been a horrible year for us, we’re blessed to have food, family and a house.

  527. Because I have, ahem, gently reminded my family of how blessed we are, we are foregoing family gifts this year and will be adopting a local family to make sure that they have plenty of presents and a memorable meal. We will then be going out to eat with the Jewish people, despite the fact that we are not Jewish (not that there’s anything wrong with that), and trying to send as much love out into our little piece of the world as we can this year.

  528. I make breakfast for my husband and daughter every morning. And I donated money yesterday to a Japanese high school that`s collecting donations for the Philippines (in the aftermath of Typhoon Haiyan). Plus I treat myself to reading your blog when I remember to. I try to be nice to me, too.

  529. My favorite Yiddish one so far?
    #36: Er zol hobn paroys makes bashotn mit oybes krets.
    He should have Pharaoh’s plagues sprinkled with Job’s scabies

  530. I’m not sure if we can afford to donate this year. But I will pass along the charity info for sure. Also, a card would mean a lot to me. Happy holidays and thank you for being you.

  531. For my good deed for random stranger, I have adopted a cantankerous old lady through our local senior agency, some one already purchased her the easy to buy items, so I will be buying granny panties, granny house shoes, granny sweat pants and of course a denim jacket to go with her jeans so she can rock the texas tuxedo to the bingo hall. much love to central missouri, much love.

  532. This is my first comment on your blog ever (even though I read it all the time). If you want to donate to Heifer, you should take a look at Patrick Rothfuss’ Worldbuilders Charity. They match what you donate to Heifer, and you can win books in a lottery too. Win all around! The link is http://www.worldbuilders.org/

  533. something nice I am going to do for someone else? no punch my husband in the face for being a douche

  534. We weren’t able to donate to these wonderful charities this year but instead bought Christmas presents for 4 needy children that are local to where we live. I love reading your blog and thank you for getting the word out about these worthy causes.

  535. We’re working on Abby’s Purple Bag Project this year (http://abbyspurplebagproject.blogspot.com/). Abby is the 5 year-old granddaughter of a colleague of mine who is fighting breast cancer). Abby is filling purple bags with things that make a cancer patient’s time better when he or she is sitting in a treatment center getting chemo, all in honor of her grandmother. Abby is trying to get 1000 bags out, with at least one in every state. She currently has 8-10 states, and almost 400 bags donated on her behalf.

  536. I try to grab angels off the tree and donate gifts or money whenever I am at a place that has a place to donate and I am able to do so. I’m also going to donate a project night night gift. Oh, and I bought the guy behind me his breakfast this morning. ‘Tis the season!

  537. Just donated to Project Night Night and shared your post on Facebook! We’re also buying gifts for a family at my daughter’s school. We frequently feel like we’re treading water financially, and have to remind ourselves that we have so much to be thankful for.

  538. I work in a coffee shop, and one of our regulars of 17 years died a couple of weeks ago. I couldn’t go to the service because I was on vacation, so instead I set up a little fundraiser amongst our employees to donate in his memory. He went to culinary school and was known by many for owning a hotdog catering company. We’re sending a nice little check to Careers through Culinary Arts to help someone follow in his footsteps who otherwise wouldn’t have the tools or money to do so! The twelve people I work with couldn’t raise nearly as much as you’re able to get your followers to do, but it still feels SOO amazing to help someone else out.

  539. Jenny,
    You rock, and I am so grateful that you share your wonderful, weird world with us. As much as I would like to send angry bees to a few people on my holiday card list (ok, more than a few), we decided to make Kiva loans instead. My 12 and 15 year olds selected the projects we would fund, and we made the loans in honor of the people we usually send useless shit to. If you still have any of those James Garfield cards left, I promise not to sell it, and I would be super-grateful if you would address it to my friend Amy. She is the one who first introduced me to your blog and bought me your book, so she really deserves it. (I think I’m not supposed to put last names or real addresses here, so please let me know how to get those to you to get the card.)
    Happy Every Holiday to you, Victor and Hailey!

  540. I made a very special cross-stitch for my brother. It was a lovely Christmas dealio with pretty poinsettias in the corners and all that crap. It said “Merry Fucking Christmas”. I’m pretty sure it was one of his favorite gifts EVER because he keeps it up in his man cave year round.

  541. For the past three years I have gotten my dad a “leg of llama” (A llama share is $20, about a sixth of a full llama, 120, so that’s 4 legs, a body and a head). He’s up to three legs now and looks forward to each leg he gets. I make a card and a poem. Last year’s poem was the 12 days of Christmas, though just 2 days for “two legs of llama.” This year is “I saw three llama legs come sailing in…”
    I also starting buying animals for my cousins/relatives during our extended family Christmas. Its so much easier than figuring out what they want for Christmas 🙂

    I love your blog, Jenny. Thanks for all you do!

  542. Every year I adopt a senior. At my local Stop & Shop there is a tree with paper ornaments with the name of a senior and what they want. Usually it’s sweatshirts, toiletries and such. This year I found a guy who wanted a CD player, headphones, a sketch pad and pencils. I’m broke so I reached out to my friends who helped me out. I can’t afford to do anything else so I really appreciate you getting extra llamas and Night Night Project bags for me.
    Thank you for all you do.

  543. Every year I donate something in my mom’s name. This year I chose ‘C is for Crocodile’ because it’s the foundation her goddaughter set up after her little boy died from leukemia, but just for you I also got her a flock of ducks. Because ducklings are cute, and should replace geese in the Twelve Days of Christmas.

    Oh, and I did stars from the Make A Wish tree this year, since it’s set up right beside where I work. Man, I’ve been super nice this Christmas. Santa, does that mean I can finally get my horse?

  544. Our company donated to project night night this year…. such a great organization, and they don’t get nearly enough attention. Our local chapter said we were the only company to donate bags to them all year. Thanks for giving them the extra publicity! 🙂

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