Pimp out your shit. Not literally though. Unless you’re selling feces. Then you might have a problem.

in You people scare me and I sort of love it.

Just a quick thank you.  The cost to keep this blog up are stupid expensive but I’m incredibly lucky that so many people support the blog by buying space in the sidebars.  Lots of them are writers and bloggers themselves and you should totally do yourself a favor and check them out because they’re lovely, and also because they are better than chocolate tacos.  Chocotacos. Great.  Now I want a chocotaco.

Also, the people who buy ads here keep me from having to do irritating things like break up posts into several pages, or having pop-up ads, or slide-shows to artificially manipulate page views.  We owe them all a drink.  Or five.

A regular blog post is coming but this morning I just want to say thanks to anyone who has ever supported this blog, either by advertising, by supporting my advertisers, by buying a book or something from my store, or who simply left fabulous comments which vigorously disprove the “DON’T READ THE COMMENTS” law of the internet.  I love you guys.

Also, I realize that lots of you know of or have fascinating shit that you’d probably like to pimp out and so today I’m opening up comments to let you pimp out whatever thing you think needs more attention.  Charities, kick-starters, books you love, etsy shops, your favorite blog post, videos that make you laugh, something you made that you’re really proud of, whatever.   (Try to limit it to less than 3 sentences though because most of us have ADD here.)

And seriously, thank you.  You keep my world going around.  Someone bring me a chocotaco.

886 thoughts on “Pimp out your shit. Not literally though. Unless you’re selling feces. Then you might have a problem.”

Read comments below or add one.

  4. Can I pimp someone else? Elan Morgan has something called Five Star Friday. It helps lift up great writing that we the people nominate. In a sea of linkbait, she brings the real deal. Nominate someone, read something. http://www.schmutzie.com/submit-an-entry/

    (I LOVE Five Star Friday. ~ Jenny)

  13. Get 15% off at the Atlanta Lady Thrashers Women’s Hockey store with coupon code “UPSET”! Check out LadyThrashers.com

  14. Ha! I am alllll about pimpin’ (you know, when I’m not lying around watching Netflix)… and this reminded me that I need to email about ad space 😉 But, you know, in the meantime, if you like dark, psychological stories with boy bands, or historical fiction with ice boats and screwed up family trees, you can check out my books here: http://cynthiahillbooks.com/about-the-books/

  17. All I’ve done lately I’m really proud of is thousands of words of Dean/Cas fanfiction…which I’m understandably hesitant to link to under my real name. But guys, it’s REALLY GOOD.

  18. I just have to say, your book is freaking hilarious. But I can only read it in places where I am alone. I started it at an airport and in an airplane (from audiobooks) and people probably thought I was legitimately insane. I was laughing and crying, and looking all sorts of crazy. With that said, read my lame blog that I don’t update nearly enough….
    http://danielle-uncledanny.blogspot.com/

  20. My blog scrappiemomma.org. 3 words????? Good Lawd thaz worse than Twitter.
    I blog about, my oxymoronic personality bc I luv Joel Osteen & bass~thumpin twerkin~bootie~music. I swear when I pray. Ex this morning: “shit shit shitJesus Please please let me effin find the top of this coffee pot oh God bc I will freaking die this am w/o coffee..” I try to be funny & heartfelt. Somex it works. Sometimes people think im angry.

  22. Your local library! Your local literacy program! Your local kid’s club! Mentors and tutors and teachers! YEEEHAAAAW!!

  34. I’m a writer (in progress…not yet published) and an artist with Muscular Dystrophy.

    Always love having new friends at @GulfCoastStudio on Twitter, or you can follow me at http://facebook.com/ugottafriend on FB.

    Thank you kindly and happy taco Tuesday (pass me a chocotaco)!

  40. I draw cartoon portraits of peoples pets. Dogs, cats, derpy taxidermied deer, whatever you like. 🙂
    <a href=”http://www.etsy.com/shop/mydogsaid”

  44. This is very generous of you. Thank you, Jenny! I am pretty proud of my last two blog posts- talking with young children about race, sex, swearing, etc… Trying to reduce stigma.

  45. As luck would have it, my post today features a fake picture of me and the lovely and talented Bloggess. I mostly talk about books, because BOOKS. Pimp Pimp, Pimpity Pimp.

  52. My friend Jules has pretty cool shit in a funky little shop in Medicine Park, OK. She’s also an alchemist and makes super delicious lotions, potions and such. Her shop sponsors a roller derby team! How much cooler can you get than that?! https://www.facebook.com/lunajoon

  64. Thank you Jenny! Do you like science fiction? Like webcomics? Check out http://www.cryo-joe.com ! The comic follows the adventures Joe Kelsey and a group of explorers who set out on a mission of exploration to a near star and get more than they bargained for…

  65. April 12 at the SunSet Lounge in Escondido, California. 9 pm – 2 am

    We are having a “Fuck Cancer” Fund Raiser. I just beat cancer so that kicked off the idea. Lots of prizes. Good music. Good times. Best of all, the funds raised are going to cancer research.

    Fuck Cancer.

  67. I’m fundraising for Girls on the Run — a local organization that uses running as a tool to support the growth of strong, confident, and healthy young women. I love how running makes me feel inside and out and this program encourages just that to young girls.

    Whether small, large, or just in spirit, I appreciate your support!

  69. Awesome job now the pregnant lady wants a chocotaco too and in this tiny part of northern NJ there isn’t any to be had!!! I guess hubby’s going on a chocotaco expedition:)

  72. This ii not my blog but its an awesome one for anyone TTC, going through infertility, adoption or know anyone who is.

    Shit its really just a funny ass blog I like to read cause it talks about vajayjays and swimmers and I enjoy 2nd grade humor.

    http://ourmisconception.blogspot.com/

  73. I figured it might be a good idea to promote Nerd HQ here, since Jenny is a wonderfully passionate nerd herself! Actor Zachary Levi and his company The Nerd Machine hold Nerd HQ every year during Comic-Con and help a charity called Operation Smile raise hundreds of thousands of dollars for operations for children with cleft lips and/or pallets while holding some awesome parties and panels for fans. Due to some sponsorship issues, they need our help funding this event, and they’re only asking for $5- for more information and/or to donate, please go to IWantMyNerdHQ.com.

  78. Do you guys know about Amazon Smile?

    Register and choose your favorite charity or no -profit, and they gey a tiny percentage of your purchase price. Yeah, it’s a really small percentage, but it’s shit you were going to buy anyway.

    My charity of choice is the Red Door shelter here in Chicago. One of the few groups that works with abandoned rabbits, and since Easter is coming and the world is full of irresponsible assholed

  80. If you’re a blogger you should really join me, Baby Sideburns, Jen from People I Want to Punch in the Throat, and so many others at BlogU this June. It’s small, affordable, and you’ll learn a crapload of awesome stuff. And NickMom is sponsoring an open bar for our Saturday night party. So there’s that, too.

    http://www.bloguconference.com

  83. Thank you for the opportunity. I work helping cancer patients whenever they have problems with their health insurance. From coverage ending due to being unable to work to challenges the families experience with their existing coverage, I try to give them the peace of mind they deserve and recognize the survivor’s efforts.

    I’ve been raising funds selling tacos and salsas (my Instagram @mexicanity has some of my weekly experiments) but any extra help will be appreciated. Even one dollar goes a long way. Thanks in advance for your kindness!

    http://main.acsevents.org/goto/HectorATX

  89. I write a blog. Lately, I’ve been posting every 2 weeks as I made a deal with a friend to give one another “friendly reminders” if we forget to post. It seems to be working well so far. I’ve remembered every time, and she… well, lets just say she’s gotten quite a few “friendly reminder” e-mails. 🙂
    My favorite post: “Gandalf The Grey, But Not So Wise.” http://jeanietortoisefly.blogspot.ca/2011/11/gandolf-grey-but-not-so-wise.html

  91. My theater company, Retro Productions, is working on this amazing new play (for your NYC readers and anyone else who can make it to NYC the first two weeks of May) called AN APPEAL TO THE WOMAN OF THE HOUSE by Christie Perfetti Williams. It runs May 3-17, 2014.

    What would you do if history knocked on your door?
    It is just after midnight in May, 1961 when David and his fellow lost Freedom Riders knock on the door seeking assistance in the form of a phone and a place to stay until daylight. But Gideon, who knows this is Klan country, is reluctant to let in this band of mixed race college kids until Rose forces him to open the door with the acknowledgement that “they’re just babies.” What follows is a touching story of race, love, acceptance and learning how to stand up for what you believe.

    FB PAGE: https://www.facebook.com/RetrosAppeal
    Fundraising page (our video is up there too): http://thefield.org/sa/550733

  96. http://www.Kiva.org. Loan to entrepreneurs world-wide, helping folks work their way out of poverty; when your loan is repaid you can loan the money out again. Win-Win! (thanks for sharing the pimp space Jenny!)

  100. In the spirit of this post I visited your advertiser, Silk Words. It reminded me a lot of any Nora Roberts romance.

  101. Five Points. It’s the revenge of the roadkill. With puppets, and a Bradley Cooper lookalike. It’s like I made it for the People of the Bloggess. (Which kinda, I did.)

  108. If you’re in Downers Grove (outside of Chicago), stop by my awesome spice & tea shop to buy some yummy things! Mention Beyonce or Jenny and I’ll give you 20% off your order. 🙂

    Spice Merchants
    5225 Main Street
    Downers Grove, IL 60515
    630-829-2000

  110. I’m pimping out the dog rescue that saved me when I was depressed. Through them I gained friends, dogs of my own, and I formed happy little dog families all over the state of Arizona: Arizona Boston Terrier Rescue. http://www.azbtrescue.org.

    They can always use donations or volunteers.

  115. I volunteer for Diamond Dachshund Rescue and we are having a wine tasting on April 4th in Boerne, Texas. It’s called Wine for Wiener Dogs. Not sure it gets any better than tasting wine to benefit rescuing dachshunds! We will even have a brewery there. If you can attend, please do. If you’d like to buy a ticket as a donation, that is also welcomed. Thanks for considering it!

    http://wineforwienerdogs.org/

  117. Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy is the leading genetic killer in children. Urge the FDA to Say YES to Accelerated Approval for safe, effective therapies for children with Duchenne. We need 100,000 signatures by midnight on March 29th. http://t.co/QFvDW7iPkf

  118. I have about a zillion tabs open right now thanks to all of you commenters. Thank you, Jenny, for giving your readers an opportunity to pimp themselves. Gonna go read/shop/donate/sign petitions now.

  119. I don’t sell anything, I just started a blog about my family’s life on a gulf island in Canada. I’m a graphic design student, we own a hair salon (the hubs is a stylist), I’m a proud soccer mom, and I’m writing my memoirs about being a hippie kid & growing up in an apostolic Pentecostal “cult” fundamentalist community… And then finding my place in the world outside of religion… I’ll be sharing some of those amusing stories on my blog too… http://islandsneezer.com

  122. Thank YOU for being so fabulously hilarious and candid and crazy 🙂 I’ve recommended your book to at least 5 people since I read it, and they all bought and loved it!

    I’d like to pimp out my blog, The Memorist (www.thememorist.com)!

  126. Chicago Knits Magazine. A new quarterly print magazine devoted to the irreverent Chicago yarn arts.

    Subscriptions and ad rates available on our website.

    chicagoknitsmag.com

    #ChicagoKnits

  129. I love the song “Happy”….I play it everyday. Pharrell Williams or WOTE(Walk Off The Earth) versions…I love them both. I am sure in 6 months I will hate this song.

  131. It’s Chocolate Peanut Butter Day on the blog: http://www.foodlustpeoplelove.com – Thirty-one recipes for chocolate and peanut butter deliciousness plus giveaways from OXO, King Arthur Flour and Peanut Butter & Co. Thanks for letting us pimp our stuff today, Jenny, and to the rest of you, thanks for stopping by. 🙂

  136. Thanks Jenny for the room to pimp! You blog and book is awese and can’t wait to the next one!!
    Here is my shameless plug! Make one of a kind coffee scoops to add a little bling to your usuall morning coffee routine! Check out my Etsy shop:) http://www.shesacrafty1.etsy.com
    Thanks again!!

  139. I make jewelry! Not a lot of people buy it, probably because I’m not so good at the mainstream thing. Some of my stuff is cute-weird and I love it, but no one else does. But i’mma pimp it out anyway because my student loans are coming due soon and I’m afraid of them. So check my store now, and then come back in a couple days, because I just bought a bag of silver cat charms and things will happen:

    http://www.storenvy.com/stores/103489-craftily-done

  141. I sell photographic prints and sex toys. But not together. Because that’d be weird. Photography is the Zenfolio link; Passion Parties is the sex toy link. jennessasby.com

  142. We own a small, local family business in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and we manufacture thermal break aluminum windows, vinyl windows and commercial store front systems. . Check us out if you’re in the tri state area at http://www.romatherm.com.

    Thanks so much Jenny!!!

  151. Everyone is invited to the 2014 Texas Wine & Rogue Art Fest in Salado, Texas this weekend, March 29 & 30. Not my event to pimp out but I so worthy of a shout out. They are Rock Stars at Salado Wine Seller! They grow it, make it and know how to celebrate it. Check out their story on the website and get a look at all the cool artists that will be at the event. 20 small wineries and some truly a-freakin-mazing artists, mixed with great food and cool music.

  152. If you are a woman of child bearing years, please make sure you get a full days requirement of folic acid (in orange juice and commercial bread) to avoid Spina Bifida and neural tube defects. The defect occurs before you even know you are pregnant.

  155. https://www.bookbub.com/home/
    This place is awesome. Free books, cheap books, so many books! I am literally backed up on my reading for at least the next 2 years with the amount of books i have gotten for FREE! Name one person who doesn’t like free stuff……See! You can’t, cuz everyone does!

  165. What a majorly cool thing to do, Jenny! I’ve found all sorts of wonderful things to support here. 🙂 And now I’ll pimp my books ’cause I’m proud of them. I used to hang out with Rock stars, party with them, even made out with a few. So my Rock romances have real Rock guys who do real Rock stuff. Plus, the books will get you all hot (in a good way!) http://julipagemorgan.com/books

  167. My latest blog post: How do you react when your young kids (6 & 10) are watching a TV show and the subject of sex change surgery comes up? If you’re me, you stall and distract and hope they forget.

  172. How fun! I’m pimping out my embroidery and it is definitely not feces…double checks Nope, no poo. etsy.com/shop/StitchFreakOnline
    Thanks, Jenny!

  173. My stepdad’s artwork/sculptures! http://www.vanderwegesculpture.com/

    I love his work – whimsical and fun, including several pieces that make me think of Dr. Seuss books, and always with a lot of thought and reflection on the world put into it. He’s a dyslexic art history professor who sculpts largely using bicycles as his medium, and I think everyone should see his stuff. 🙂

  175. Check out Nadia Bolz-Weber – a female, tattoo-covered Lutheran pastor who brings an amazing amount of clarity and insight into our relationships with God, established religion, and each other. While I am good with God & Jesus, I’ve never had much patience for dour, judgy church-people. If you feel the same, you will really enjoy this woman!!!

  177. I was one of tehe VM movie backers, so I ask fans to go see the movie in theaters this week while it’s still out. And then maybe buy the digital download or VOD. There is also a book, a soundtrack and a score you can purchase, plus all 3 seasons. By supporting the movie, you support the fans who helped make it happen, and that can only lead to sequel(s). Thanks!

    http://www.fandango.com/veronicamars_166515/movietimes

  178. Nothing to pimp and I’m too old and worn out to be trying to pimp myself.
    Just want to Thank You for always making an old geezer geek’s day a little better with your humor and candid blog posts and tweets.

  181. After pimping my site, I just wanted to leave a second comment to thank you and everyone else who comments here for being an antidote to the “want to rip the commenter out of the screen and slap them around a bit” kind of comment sections you find in too many other places. (Like the one place where someone actually claimed that people suffering from depression could just “decide to be happy.” Where’s the “drop an anvil on the commenter’s head” link?)

  183. I once made a giant hostess cupcake for a website called “pimp your snack”. In an unrelated note, I’m pimping my etsy shop, although it’s a bit sparse at the moment. More nerdy jewelry and superhero bags will be added soon.

  184. Professional theatrical costume designer and technician – sharing my portfolio. If anyone is looking to commission anything from a Halloween costume to a wedding gown, take a peek. I’d love to make you something fun and funky! http://www.MarciAgnes.com

  185. Aw, how lovely of you! I’d love to buy an ad off you sometime in the next year. 🙂 Some of the sites I’ve visited through your ads have given me hours of entertainment (or envy at the shiny things!)
    In the meantime; I’m a freelance writer (writingbyapril.co.uk) and I write elsewhere too (http://wizzley.com/authors/April_M/ for instance).

    And so as not to be entirely selfish, I’d like to pimp Maggies, who support people with cancer and people affected by cancer, including friends and family of those with it. https://www.maggiescentres.org/

  189. Jenny, you are awesome for giving people the opportunity to do this. And for many, many other reasons. Your book was one of the best purchases I ever made, and I buy a lot of stuff. The only thing I want to promote is senior shelter pet adoption. <3 Thanks!

  192. Thank YOU!

    I guess I’ll pimp myself. I don’t blog about personal stuff very often, but at the end of every month I post a media update in which I review every book I read and movie I watched. Occasionally there’s also a video game review. I can be found here: http://sairentohiru.blogspot.com/

    On the non-selfish front, I would like to pimp Meaty by Samantha Irby (hysterical memoir) and The Fall (breathtakingly beautiful and achingly sad movie starring Lee Pace).

  196. Oh god, so many blogs links and etsy stores for me to click on. I’m like a kid in a candy store (or a john cruising up a street lined with hookers, to keep Jenny’s metaphor going).

    And while we’re at it, I’ll pimp out my own Noble Squid Workshop. We design wedding invitations exclusively for you: http://www.noblesquid.com.

  197. I am promoting my blog design/resume/virtual assistant business. Why? Because my daughter needs braces and a tongue cradle and our dental insurance covers very little of it. If I don’t get her the braces soon, she will need jaw surgery. She’s nine and gets made fun of at school because of her teeth. Skewed Design Studios

  199. Thanks! I’d like to bring attention to Noonday Collection, a company that uses fashion & design to create economic opportunity for the vulnerable. For our artisans, we provide dignified jobs at living wages, no-interest loans, scholarship programs, emergency assistance and long-term trade. You create a marketplace for our artisans so they can earn more and work less and keep their families together. We also give a portion of our sales to place orphans in forever families. http://www.gracemiller.noondaycollection.com

  200. Three year old girl who called Gov Christie out on her house not being fixed yet from Hurricane Sandy cannot live in the RV they’ve spent the last 16 months in anymore. She has a disease that at any time can grow tumors along her nerve endings. Recently, a Go Fund Me has been set up so one of the rental properties the family owns can be fixed up enough to move into. Please share:

    http://www.gofundme.com/Nicole-House-Still-Broken

    Oh, and I’m a boudoir photographer in San Jose, CA. Will travel. 🙂

  208. Authors…. If you’re looking for a book cover, I would love to talk to you. I still have a few openings in April. But they’ll go quickly!

    facebook.com/thecovercounts
    thecovercounts.com

  216. My husband’s fishing blog. Someone should read it since I don’t! fishthebaja.com

  218. I have an Etsy shop, though it’s kind of pathetic and really well-named.

    https://www.etsy.com/shop/studiorandom

    Also, as a mother who knows what it’s like to unnecessarily lose a child to adoption, I’ve gotten to the point that I really want to help other moms who don’t really want to give up their children but are being forced/coerced/pushed by circumstances/nicely browbeaten with stupid propaganda by self-serving people, into doing so. I’m not sure where to begin and already had one false start but if I come up with an answer before you do another of these posts I am totally going to pimp it here because one person’s heartbreak doesn’t justify causing another’s, period–and wow, I did limit myself to three sentences, runon as they are. 🙂

  219. Nothing to pimp out…just wanted to say that I’m pretty sure you’re a lost member of my family. Okay not really, but you’d fit in really well. 🙂

  223. I would love for anyone who has any extra money at all to consider donating to either:
    Make a Wish @ http://wish.org/
    or
    4Paws for Ability @ http://4pawsforability.org/

    We all know the amazing work that Make a Wish does and my daughter just had her wished fulfilled for a seizure alert dog thru Make a Wish and 4Paws for Ability. 4Paws is the only licensed service dog facility in the country that will give a service dog to kids with the level of disabilities that my daughter has. Along with providing amazing service dogs to kids with special needs, they give the to our Veterans who need some extra help after coming home from war. They are just amazing. Thanks for looking!

  226. Six weeks ago, I got knocked up by a stranger who lives 3,000 miles away and a nurse with a steady hand. Shit got even realer when I found out there’s TWO feti up in there. I’m writing a blog, which will eventually become a memoir. Check it out if you like that kind of shit.

  231. Buy Allie Brosh’s book HYPERBOLE AND A HALF. For when you have read and re-read THE BLOGGESS, and her book, and it is late, and you need something funny and meaningful to read.

  233. I forgot my url! Here it is again in a nutshell and sorry I’m posting twice!
    Help a girl activate her #limitlesspotential by donating to Girls on the Run Boston! I love how running makes me feel inside and out and this program encourages just that to young girls.
    http://tinyurl.com/ngutl4y

  236. BTW: I’m going to click on every link in the comments and see what I can bookmark, like, comment on, or buy. Thanks for giving me something to do today that’s more fun than cleaning up after our new puppy, who is adorable, but still… Shopping is way better than picking up poop.

  241. My books:
    Flaming Spotted Dick: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00I4KRNP8/

    Unofficial Distorted View Bar Guide: 3rd Edition: Le Sexoflex expansion: http://www.amazon.com/Unofficial-Distorted-View-Bar-Guide-ebook/dp/B00I4BEA7Q

    Answering Kirk Hastings: http://www.amazon.com/Answering-Kirk-Hastings-Examining-Claims-ebook/dp/B00IZ66AIC/

    What is Truth?: Second Edition: http://www.amazon.com/What-Truth-Edition-Matthew-Wunderlich-ebook/dp/B00HNELSN4

  242. I want to “pimp out” my non-profit afterschool program. It’s called The Mini Mermaid Running Club and it’s all about empowering young girls to value themselves and appreciate their uniqueness, learn to love movement, and to learn how to advocate for themselves and see the truth and lies we are constantly bombarded with as women about who and what we are supposed to act like/look like/be like. We offer the program at no cost to schools with greater than 65% of students receiving free or reduced priced lunch.

    http://www.minimermaidrunningclub.org

  244. Leukemia/Lymphoma patients often need bone marrow transplants to save their lives – and it’s not the big scary needle in the back type surgery dramatic tv shows would have you believe! You can sign up online to be sent a DNA cheek swab test which will then add you to the online worldwide registry that is used to search for bone marrow matches – if you do match, you do a simple blood draw which is used to CURE PEOPLE OF CANCER. Incredible!

    Sign up here:
https://www.deletebloodcancer.org/home.html

  247. I’m Director of Programming for Norwescon, the Pacific Northwest’s premier science fiction and fantasy convention. We’re all-volunteer, non-profit, and a heck of a good time if you’re into that kind of thing. Our next convention is Easter weekend, and we’ve got an awesome lineup if I do say so myself: http://www.norwescon.org/

  249. I’m pimping out myself (but not like that)… because I want to go on 50 first dates during the next 12 months. Why not?

  261. I write a humor blog that I’d love for you to check out! My Hubs and I are childfree by choice, so don’t expect a mommy blog.

  263. My brother wanted to learn to make apps & I like to drink… Lickety Shots was born! Try them out. They make your day better & increase your popularity at work (except with the boss)!
    Love you Jenny! Pimpin’ ain’t easy but you make it look like it is!

  266. First of all, your book is phenomenal, I loved it. When’s the second one coming? And second, I’m a proud consultant for Rodan + Fields and would love to help your readers find BEAUTIFUL skin (boys AND girls alike!). Thanks for always keeping us laughing 😀

  268. Kids’ book about special needs puppy “Poppy the Three-Legged Puppy” by Sue Sewell available on Amazon! Great for all kids 2-8.

  270. I love that you have decided to allow us to pimp ourselves out in recognition for supporting your site! I love that you don’t do all the crazy ad things like other sites!

    I would love to share my newly formed Etsy shop: blurredlinesofsanity.etsy.com I only have one Doctor Who themed item up as of now, but I am working away in a dark room making more things I promise!!

  271. Nothing to sell.. yet. I have a book I’m working on that was practically born (created?) to be advertised on The Bloggess side bar, but I’m still writing.

    That said, this is cool. Thanks Jenny!

  274. I am a volunteer with Impact Bay Area, a grassroots nonprofit that teaches full force self-defense and verbal boundary setting to women, teens, and little kids. http://www.impactbayarea.org/

    They are awesome and are developing LGBTQ classes this year, and if you give them money it turns into scholarships so no one ever gets turned away due to lack of funds.

  276. I’m an avid stalker of your blog, but I don’t comment because apparently my social anxiety extends to the internets. All that to say, you always help me feel brave so I thought today was as good a day as any to post, since it not only scares me to comment but to put my blog out there…

  285. I actually JUST got back from selling at a convention! My friend makes custom etched glass and barware- and all of it is geeky! There’s a lot on the site now, and more is going up as soon as we photograph is. She also takes commissions- really she can put almost anything on a glass. And since we’re big nerds, we won’t look at you funny when you make a request!
    http://www.etsy.com/shop/CoventryDecor

  290. World Vision just decided to hire (or not discriminate against hiring) people in homosexual relationships. As a result a lot of far right “christians” are dropping their support for the children World Vision helps. If you would like to counteract this ridiculous stance of taking money away from hungry kids because of a stupid doctrine debate – go sponsor a child here:
    http://my.worldvision.org/

  291. Today the student athletes at Ryerson University are running a Twitter campaign to raise awareness and funds for mental wellbeing and the Do it for Daron program at The Royal in Ottawa, a youth-driven initiative focused on raising awareness and inspiring conversations about youth mental health. Tweet & RT the hashtag #RamsTalk and the Ryerson Rams will donate five cents. As of 12:00 there had been 7,907 #RamsTalk tweets, $395.35 and counting! http://www.difd.com/ #DepressionLies

  294. I want recognize Canine Companions for Independence and the great work they do! Please visit their site and read about them. Also, for anyone in the Atlanta area, there will be a charity fundraiser: http://www.cci.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=1077173&lis=0&kntae1077173=651F3F8FE80A4D9CB296D58D0539FAD8
    If you want to donate to the event or participate, here’s another link: http://www.cci.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=1077173&supid=390044438
    Thank you Jenny for the opportunity to post this!

  295. I don’t know about chocotacos — but I’ll testify to the glory of salty nacho chips with vanilla icing.
    This discovery had nothing to do with trying to keep myself from eating my daughter’s chocolate-dipped pretzels. Really.

  298. I just want to thank everyone who has ever jumped over to my blog after I’ve commented here – I hope I haven’t disappointed anyone. Hugs, Jenny!

  299. Oops…Hey, Jenny, the first comment I posted (that didn’t seem to appear) is showing up now. I didn’t mean to comment twice. The first comment, number 123, could probably be deleted if you get a chance/want to. Thank you and I’m sorry.

  300. i don’t have a site or anything, but…

    Jenny, i saw you when i was just starting to write my Master’s thesis, and i saw you again the day before i submitted it. And the thing i have to pimp out is… my thesis was named the Outstanding Thesis of my College for 2014. i didn’t win the overall University prize… but seriously being told my thesis was good enough to beat out all the other theses from all the other department in my college (social sciences), not to mention the fact that my department wanted to nominate it in the first place, is the biggest victory i could ever have dreamed of.

    And you honestly, really, helped me through it. i don’t know how i could have done it without the lovely distractions you supplied me with, plus the blanket encouragements, and those wise words from Neil Gaiman “Pretend you’re awesome.” I did. and i guess now i kind of am.

    So i guess in pimping myself, i’m pimping you too. Wait. That sounds wrong. But seriously. Thank you.

  303. I’m actually about to do a charity!!!! I’ll give u details when I get it started. I’ve decided I can’t help everybody—but I CAN help one person!! That’s my new charity motto.

  304. I’ll pimp out one of my favorite charities that helps dogs and kitties get adopted. I live all the way across the country but they are family supporting family and 100% go to the animals! http://projectpearlnc.org

    Love how you care for animals and find the awesome in their personalities! Check them out of FB too people!!

  305. And also I will plug Merimask… https://www.etsy.com/shop/Merimask who I had the fun of discovering at a local event when she was selling leather butterflies. SPECIFIC SPECIES butterflies, mind you. If/when we ever move to a bigger home, I want one of her masks like she designed for Cirque de Soleil!

  307. There is a really cool small monkey business who did a really cool thing for kids this past week. The owner opened up and shared her money with a children’s charity so I want to take this chance to share her “page” with you! It’s super awesome and I would have shared anyway even if she wasn’t sharing anything, I just thought I’d throw that in! http://www.facebook.com/themonkeyshow1 (There is a website too that connects from the page but I don’t remember it)

  310. Jenny, I love your blog, and love your book. Hurry up and get that next one out so my wife and I can almost die laughing again. And for all your other faithful followers: anyone that has a small business, or is trying to start one, the company I work for is giving away 10 All-in-One printers and 3 five packs of ink with each printer. All you have to do is fill out a form that tells a little about your business and future goals. Full contest info can be found at the inkfarm.com blog.

  311. Kickstarter for Small Town Witch – an amazing book written by amazing writer and gorgeously illustrated by awesome ladies that’s finishing in a couple of hours and I want it to hit the last stretch goal because then we’ll get an audio drama! :O (I can’t wait to get my hands on my copy of this book!)
    https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1762462300/small-town-witch-an-illustrated-magic-noir-story

    And while I’m here, you may want to check out my free mystery-fantasy webcomic which is going kind of slow right now because I’m working on my portfolio to get a job (anyone want to hire me? I draw pretty art!): http://morethanahunch.smackjeeves.com/ ;p

  317. I am terrible at self promotion so I am using this excuse to get out of comfort zone. Plugging my blog, The Married Writer. Thanks for inspiring me!

  318. I draw owls and frequently other animals having horrible/awesome adventures and trying to eat ice cream. I also rant pretty frequently. Maybe don’t read it, actually.

  319. I always get a couple of hits on my blog when I post here, so I will shamelessly promote it given your generous permission. Read about my experiences working as a TV extra (and other nerdy stuff) at http://nosmorex.wordpress.com. Leave a nice comment if you like it.

    Thanks for everything you do, Jenny. You’re the bestest.

  320. I have nothing to pimp out except my blog, and I think there’s been enough of that already on this comment thread. So I’ll just tell you to keep being awesome.

  324. You make a great pimp Jenny! Does this mean you are going to start wearing a dodgy velour sweatsuit and gold chains?
    I am pimping out my blog of style & travel, Wandering Chic, please check it out and comment! Love to hear where I can improve
    http://Www.wanderingchic.com

  327. This tweet seriously cracked me up this morning:
    @_blotty “U think ID EVER be UR friend? HAHA ur a SHORT, HAIRY LOSER. The light leaves my dog’s eyes. I’ve established myself as leader. But at what cost?”

  328. Jenny, first off I want to say that I love you and your blog. I literally laughed so hard that a little pee came out when I read your post about the giant metal chicken.

    Today I want to pimp out my friend’s Go Fund Me page. He’s battling Lou Gehrig’s Disease and has spent the three years since his diagnosis raising and then giving away $100,000 through his charity. 100% of the money he collects is donated to other families battling Lough Gehrig’s disease, even as his own family struggles to make ends meet. Now his family needs money to pay for a stem cell treatment that will drastically improve his quality of life and even prolong his time left. Check out http://www.gofundme.com/7s3tdo and consider giving a few bucks to a good guy who needs to catch a break.

  332. My blog is ending in 5 days because I can’t afford it, but it was not as cool as yours. Just a way for me to talk some things out. I will miss it. I will cheerfully read yours though!

  335. We dip your sh*t!
    Custom Hydro-graphics to bling your gear!
    Anything from guns and cars to cabinets and wine racks.
    Hundreds of prints to choose from including camo, animal design, marble, etc.
    DeadEye Liquid Graphics
    Find us on Facebook or check out our website.
    http://www.DeadEyeLG.com

  336. Silence in the Library Publishing is putting out a science fiction anthology featuring over 30 top authors, including Gene Wolfe, to benefit author CJ Henderson, who is battling cancer for the second time. Check it out here: http://igg.me/at/monkey-around Thanks!!

  338. Sentence the first: CthulhuSlippers is a comic (illustrated by yours truly) about what happens when Great Old Ones try to run a Mega-corporation.

    Sentence the second: I made a shirt about warm bread because everyone loves warm bread (except probably gluten allergic folks unless it’s rice bread which is also best served warm).

    Sentence the third: All the rest of my silly creations can be found over at my blog <a href=”http://www.thefuzzyslug.com>The Fuzzy Slug.

    Thanks Jenny! 🙂

  339. Umm… I recently took third place in adult women’s freestyle archery for the entire state of California…. And that made me pretty furiously happy….

  342. I’m pimping out my writers’ group in the Seattle area: Green River Writers’ Group. We are mostly novel-writing people, but we do short stories and non-fiction as well. We meet every other Tuesday at Panera in Kent, WA at 6 pm. Our next meeting is April 1st. I promise it’s not an April Fool’s joke.

  345. I paint things in chalk pastels, mostly flowers, sometimes they don’t look too vagina-y. 🙂
    My Facespaces…

    My Website…

    And you can follow me on Twitter (danastrotheide) or Instagram (also danastrotheide)

  346. I’m pimping out my writing group. We meet every other Tuesday at 6 pm-ish at Panera in Kent, WA. We are mostly novelists of all genres, but we also have some short story-ists and will even take non-fiction. Next meeting is April 1. I swear it’s not an April Fool’s joke.

  347. Out of the Darkness walks for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. It’s just a good cause. Donate to the cause, walk yourself, or help a team or individual meet the (very tough) $1000 minimum. http://www.theovernight.org

  352. I have no idea how Ann would feel about this pimping, but if anyone is in Southeast Texas I would love for you to check out our local Listen to Your Mother Show that is happening on May 4th. Click my name for a link to the details.

    Thanks Jenny.

  353. I will pimp my hometown, New Orleans. It’s spring, the weather is gorgeous and we love to have visitors! NOLA is a city where we celebrate the crazy, weird and flamboyant. Come on down!

  357. My blog of places I’ve been (Amazon cruise to the the local park), crafts and garden/cooking.

  358. I’ve got one: Support your local ballet company!
    Track them down and INSIST on going to see a production. It’s fun! Or go and take class. That’s even more fun!

    This is the company to which I belong. They are terrific people, and Lois Ellyn, former George Ballanchine protegé, is a genius.

    http://www.nouveauchamberballet.com/

    (Local to Fullerton, in southern California. But there must be one near you! TO THE INTERNETS!)

    Cheers!
    – Patrick

  360. I’m not here to pimp, only to ask: Am I still supportive of you if I stole your book from my brother’s girlfriend because she isn’t cool enough to love and respect your sense of humor? She doesn’t know I have it yet….its been 4 months….anyways, love you, despite my cheapness.

  370. Oh my goodness! There’s do many comments, no one is going to read this one. The women at {she crew} are planning an awesome summer program for teen girls in Chicago and they are in the midst of raising money for their program. Go here to read a vastly more eloquent summary and to donate: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/she-crew

  375. I make lace boleros to wear on your wedding day. B/c you don’t want grandma to know you have “strategically placed” tattoos. Or you have a weird rash on your arms known as “Chicken Rash” (look it up). Or you need to hide your side boob cleavage b/c you went to happy hour instead of the gym. (This is a valid choice. Wine is good for your health. Start good habits now for a happy marriage.) https://www.etsy.com/shop/AlisaBenay

  378. I will use this opportunity to first THANK YOU Jenny for being awesome and helping me understand why my job in Intensive Mental Health Crisis services is so important and how far reaching the problem really is. and second to solicite donatings for the American Cancer Society!!You can donate here http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLCY14NE?px=35879597&pg=personal&fr_id=59785&__utma=2443503.54979858.1392136053.1395417577.1395768976.12&__utmb=2443503.11.9.1395770659803&__utmc=2443503&__utmx=-&__utmz=2443503.1395768976.12.4.utmcsr=AR_Donation_Received_CY14_blackbaud|utmccn=Relay_For_Life|utmcmd=email&__utmv=-&__utmk=18517562

  383. I pimp you frequently on my blog because you are part of the Trinity of Bloggers. If you must know the other two, duh, Insane in the Mom-Brain and Moms Who Drink and Swear. If you want to see your store at the bottom of posts and what not… http://www.dribblesngrits.com

    I also blog at (If I have to scream no more calling each other poopies to my kids one more time)
    http://bellafontsblog.blogspot.com/ It’s more about what I’m learning about blogging as I blog.

  384. Not my shit, but something I just found:
    https://www.facebook.com/wearecotd
    Come Out of the Dark is a campaign to begin a better, richer national conversation about depression. Sign up for their e-newsletter and they will mail you a free glow in the dark wristband.

  394. I have nothing to pimp out, but I did want to share one of my favorite sunrise photos…. I am obsessed with sunrises and sunsets. I took this photo by my home in Corpus Christi, Texas….can y’all say “Ahhhhhh” in your most relaxed tone of voice? http://t.co/SoJEo5qp4P

  403. Just in case there’s anyone in the Bay Area, I’d like to pimp the used bookstore where I work. Everyone who works here is really great, and the books are awesome! Our twitter: @knowknewbooks

    Thanks, Bloggess! Yours is one of the few places online where comments don’t make me angry.

  406. Something I’m really proud of…I know a lot of people say it, and Jenny you do have an awesome one, but my three children are amazing. I seriously got lucky with them. They give me headaches, but the hugs, humor, intelligence, and sticky kisses on my cheek are so wonderful!

  407. Shameless Self Promotion: 24problems.com

    I give advice and make observations. Unfortunately, I am not qualified for it.

  410. FREE LOLITA!

    In 1970 a 2-year-old orca whale was taken from Puget Sound (Washington State) and has been performing for over 40 years in Miami in the smallest marine mammal tank in North America. The comment period to grant her endangered species status like the rest of the orcas from Puget Sound ends in 3 days… It’s time to bring her home and support those people that haven’t given up. http://www.orcanetwork.org/Main/index.php?categories_file=Lolita

  411. Thank you for this, Jenny!

    And thanks to everyone who pimped out their stuff today. I’ve spent the day reading, laughing, thinking, sympathizing, and absolutely not getting any work done. I call that a win. This is such a weird and wonderful tribe!

  412. Thanks Jenny! How about some afterlife reading? Spirits…They Are Present, by Janet Mayer. Your loved ones, including pets live on ya know! Taxidermied pets included! (Included, meaning they live on, not included with the book!) Just wanted to clarify that!

  414. Not pimping but just wanted to say something.
    I love your blog, and love your book, and love your pics and attitude.
    My wife and I flick each other links to your site when life is getting us down.
    I have to say though I am sick of “mainstream society’s” predilection to downgrade mental illness into some form of joke currency, such as everyone is a bit autistic,depressed, anxious, or OCD.
    As someone who has to live with these and other issues on a day to day basis, I’d love to see anyone have to live my experience just for one day and see just how funny it is when these things colour your perception and rule your behaviour; even trying to avoid these behaviours feels like falling into the trap of acknowledging and allowing for it.
    That’s all; love the site, love your work, and love the majority of the comments.
    Oh, and the next time I’m feeling a bit Bipolar (yet to be formally diagnosed, but I think it’s in the mix somewhere), I’m going to town on your shop, love the shirts, and totally relate to “feeling stabby”.

  417. Nearly forgot- this time of year, make sure your friends know not to get rabbits/ ducks/ chicks as Easter gifts. Most Easter bunnies (who should live 7-12 years) die before their first birthday due to improper care.
    http://makeminechocolate.org/ (National Campaign based in Columbus, Ohio)
    http://magichappensrescue.com/ (Baton Rouge area rescue on whose board I’m proud to serve)

  426. One of your advertisers, Sandrandan Jewelry, makes me happy every time I open the earring drawers in my very large jewelry armoire. The jewelry is FABULOUS and quite inexpensive. And each piece comes in its own cute little box with a stretchy gold ribbon. I’ve given many pairs of earrings as gifts and kept many, many, many for myself! Check it out, people!

  429. This is my friend Jen’s shop-
    http://www.sprogtoggery.com

    She makes incredible, geeky, and AMAZEBALLS knitted stuff. It is seriously worth a look if you are in the market for adorable baby stuffs, cool hats, etc.

  432. Wow, I think this is the most commenting I’ve ever seen on a single blog post!

    I think we have a similar reader group, so here’s my thing I’d like to PIMP THE SHIT out of:

    http://www.lifeplus1.me

    Life. Love. Travel. And everything else post baby. It’s really incredible how such small little beings can change every single facet of your life. Hope you’ll all join me on this journey of randomness.

    Life+1
    New Post: Off the Yucatan

  439. I already advertise here, and have for a long time, but I’ll pimp my shit anyway!

    If everyone person who reads this blog would buy just one piece of jewelry a year from https://sandrandan.etsy.com/, I could retire from my soul-sucking day job and spend my days designing and making wonderful things. Anyway, I predict that I will be famous someday, so consider the bragging rights you’ll have when you own an original “Sandrandan” piece!

  455. I want to pimp out Gabriel Dunston who’s an artist and writer. He’s publishing his next book, Purgatory Pub (first two chapters are on his site at http://www.firelightsmedia.com) which is about what happens when your shoulder angel and demon have a beer and talk about you.

  462. Thanks Jenny! I sell Stella & Dot and I’m going to pimp out my Facebook page because we have an Autism Boutique starting April 1, for which 100% of profits go to the HollyRod Foundation which helps families dealing with Autism and is just an amazing charity. http://www.facebook.com/larasmithstelladot

    P.S. – OMG I have to work today – but I’ve already clicked through some of the links – it’s gonna take MONTHS to get through all the great stuff on here! I love this tribe!

  463. I have a Blog that is for advice about anything. It just started and I would love some questions to help get it off the ground.
    Thanks.
    Adviceaboutall.blogspot.com

  464. I’m pimping out a really, really lousy joke, that my son won’t let me tell his friends. He’s in 4th grade & already embarrassed of his mother — I’m so proud he’s precocious!

    Anyway, did you know that The Lego Movie* was originally intended to be an animal documentary? Yes, the theme song would be “Everything Is Possum.” (You’re welcome for the earworm.)

    *I do understand that anyone who does not have a 9 – 12 year old boy has probably missed this movie, but it’s the latest obsession at our house. Until we go see The Muppets this weekend.

  468. I blog, not nearly as funny as you, but I try and keep it real. newborn stuff and dirty diapers (and how to clean them-cloth yo!), a 5 year old that can read as well as I can, and a 2 year old who’s going to surprise us all, I’m fairly sure.. No pinterest pretty crap. Just life.. without bubble wrap… http://www.lifeisnotbubblewrapped.com

  471. I buy your books. I want to own a Beyonce chicken.
    I sell jewelry – and its AWESOME. 🙂
    Facebook.com/candiceandjulia or candicelamb.origamiowl.com

  475. I just want to say thank you. Your blog makes me smile, sometimes it makes me laugh out loud. I have four grown kids… my youngest son is breaking my heart. Hard to explain, but not much makes me smile these days. You can see it in my eyes, which even to me have become …blank…empty. My kids are my whole life. Sad really, since at 60, you would think that I might have a life of my own, but no. Not so much. So, Thank you for the smiles

  476. sgcreativeproject.tumblr.com! Just started a new blog and could use a follower or two thank youuuu. I promise it’s all short and sweet! Some pics, some baking, some crafts, whateva.

  482. Buy my book!!!!!WAH Professionals to help you decide if the work at home lifestyle is for you. Available on Amazon and kindle as well as the create space store. Please like my page on Facebook. Micaa Miles. I am just starting out and live the support. I rant about random things and have ea link to my blog there. http://WWW.blogspot.com/enchantressmicaa. Thanks so much!!!!

  484. Damn, I have nothing to pimp. Um, I am awesome, so there.

    But, seriously, I’m so thankful for your awesomeness. It makes me feel better on the really shitty days. And you have posted so many amazing things, I have discovered so much coolness to share with friends.

    Oh, I know! My friend has an etsy shop, and makes amazing AND geeky Fascinators! There are even Star Wars and Doctor Who Fascinators! If this is your kind of thing, check her out!
    http://www.etsy.com/shop/msformaldehyde

  487. Is Toto your favorite character from The Wizard of Oz? Then check out Col. Potter Cairn Rescue Network’s website cairnrescue.com or blog http://cairnrescue.blogspot.com/
    You can adopt a cairn, donate to help rescue cairns, or just look at the adorable pictures! Thanks Jenny!!!

  489. Don’t have anything to pimp out yet. One day. One day….
    But thanks for the opportunity!

  493. Come on over to my website, http://www.keppiehed.com/ . I’m a writer with some real books to my credit, but this is where you can check out my work for free.

    Thanks so much, Jenny. Like everyone else, I’m a huge fan, and this was very generous of you.

  494. My friend has this amazing Jewelry shop jewelry.luvcherie.com She makes all the things on there, and they are fabulous. Also, she inspires me because she has many challenges to being able to keep her business going, but keeps working to put her creativity out there.

  495. Sculptural Firebowls handmade by artist John T. Unger are luxury fire features valued for exceptional beauty, craftsmanship and design. American made firepits, hand cut from 100% recycled steel, John T. Unger’s Sculptural Firebowls have been featured in The New York Times, HGTV and DIY network.

    http://store.johntunger.com/collections/firebowls

  506. I also have a blog – mostly food, house and gardening, but I do throw in an occasional kid post. I don’t need to give them ANOTHER reason to charge me for therapy later.
    rindymae.blogspot.com

  507. Anyone want CHOCO TACO’S?!? No, just kidding. I am so proud of my new Indonesian inspired, easy to follow, tasty recipes food blog

  515. I wrote an article (okay, technically a blog post) about how to make the best nutritional choices you can within your food budget and what stores/markets you have access to. My target audience was people in food deserts who pretty much only have access to Walmart or Food Lion or whatever, grocery-wise, but the basic principles apply even at Whole Foods or Trader Joes. So in case it helps anyone: http://saltycrunchybitterfresh.blogspot.com/2014/03/hunting-and-gathering-at-walmart-or.html

  517. I really want to pimp out my own business here, but there is something much more important. ADOPT DON’T SHOP! Support animal rescue and animal shelters. There are far too many animals dying and it needs to stop.

  520. I have nothing to pimp. I do want to tell you that I’m glad there is a place to celebrate the beautiful absurd weirdness in this world. You are my people.

  524. My own blog of course (cathyshowsup.blogspot.com) about trying to be healthy in spite of real life, but two other favorites: theswallowflies.blogspot.com, and herecomeshappiness.blogspot.com – about health, gratitude, and joy, with swearing.

  525. I’m not going to pimp anything, I just wanted to say thank you back because you linked to a post on my blog a few weeks back, and my page views went frickin’ crazy. For about three days I knew what it felt like to be a super popular blogger, and it felt really good. Mwah I kiss you on both cheeks.

  527. Somehow I am skeptical that anyone will scroll this far down, but I’ll put it out there – I’m an American way over my head in Switzerland, and my blog is http://www.destinationmacaron.blogspot.ch
    PS – Just picked up my own copy of your book today (the library copy was not sufficient, I had to OWN it). You are expensive in Switzerland (but then so’s everything else)

  529. such cool people/things here.

    the best I’ve got…I donated a kidney to my brother a year and a half ago, and now I’m running in the Donor Dash 5k to help raise awareness for organ donation. share your spares! 🙂

    Sponsor me!

  534. if I could pimp out my shit and people would actually listen to me, I would work my ASS off to get the phrase “I’m so OCD” erased from the entire world. And then I’d like raise some money so they can fix my brain or something……

  535. I’m just a dysfunctional veteran trying to help other dysfunctional veterans! And I sell some pretty awesome skincare and bath & body products! Seriously, there’s A LOT of love behind business and I’m passionate about supporting PTSD awareness through my biz. ❤️
    http://www.facebook.com/scrubsoflove

  536. Thanks for letting me pimp out my blog http://www.thesimplehive.com. I’m not selling anything. It’s just a way to appease the voices in my head. And thank you for making me laugh maniacally. My husband won’t let me read anything of yours while we are in traffic. I disturb him, he says.

  541. I’ve been blogging since the death of my sweet (and sometimes naughty) dog, because I’ve been having a hard time dealing with it and find writing is helpful. If you have lost a pet and feel lost because of it, maybe we can help each other through? lifeafterivan.blogspot.com xo

  542. I started my etsy site when I was unemployed and desperately needed something to do during the day and I really missed graphic design (and the extra money was nice, I do enjoy not being homeless). I sell original and custom prints and printable items. Anyway, here it is: http://whimsywonderdesigns.etsy.com

  544. Fair Trade!!!!! I work at a fantastic shop in Dallas. We straight pimp a fuckton of fair trade items, y’all. http://www.kiez.us. My bosses don’t know I am writing this, so I never wrote the word, fuckton..even though it is a perfectly acceptable unit of measurement. Thank you for your blog. Thank you for you.

  545. I started my etsy site when I was unemployed and desperately needed something to do during the day and I really missed graphic design (and the extra money was nice, I do enjoy not being homeless). I sell original and custom prints and printable items. Anyway, here it is: http://whimsywonderdesigns.etsy.com

  546. OMG!! Why would you do this!!???? I have things to do!! Like look for a job!! (was recently made redundant) I only went to one llink that was close to the top and now gotta continue reading his shit. (Daddy Scratches link saved) Scared shitless to go further. Can’t bear not to try French Toast Kitty… Looks like I’ll start on my list tomorrow.. I’ve had to stop reading your comments for a reason. It’s like going down a rabbit hole… LOVE

  548. The school where I work: The Palmdale Aerospace Academy, http://www.tpaa.org. Because we’re awesome, and nerdy, and they gave me the job title of “ninja”.

  553. i read a lot of these and clicked on a few – some talented people here! thanks for this opportunity, jenny.

    i don’t sell anything. i write. my blog is about me: life, recovery, school, depression, chronic illness, cats. there’s actually a lot about cats. and disney. things that make me happy. you know.

    http://justanotherwastedday.blogspot.com

  554. Feels weird to do this, but… I’m a dancer trying to fundraise enough to get to some top workshops this summer. These are the kinds of workshops that can mean the difference between a professional dancer and a hobbyist, so… http://www.gofundme.com/anna-workshops

    Jenny, your blog is best blog. Likewise, your book is best book.

  555. I can’t think of anything I want to pimp out more than Jenny Lawson. Wait, that didn’t sound quite right. Might help with the blog costs though!

  557. Jenny, I think this is how you continue to break the whole damn internet.
    Love you BUNCHES!!!
    Sarah, the Queen

  558. Once a month please go out and see some live music in a local small club. Take a chance on a unknown band. Support your local music scene. Please!

  559. I’m a kick-ass graphic designer. I do lots of vintage design (from pretty much any time period, or made-up ones like steampunk). I design lots of logos and business cards and such, but I especially love doing really unique personal wedding invitations for weird couples. I have not yet done any with taxidermy on them, but I totally would. I did do one very classy invitation that heavily featured the couple’s pet hedgehog. http://www.RosentholDesign.com

  560. I hope everyone reads comments all the way to the end! My friend has been writing forever and just published. If you like crime novels please buy one of his. Jenny, thank you.

  564. Thank you, Jenny, for being you…a friend and I often ask each other, “What would Jenny do?” when confronted with certain situations. Pimpin’ out my Etsy store with jewelry for people AND dolls (BJDs!)

    http://www.etsy.com/shop/Azzieattic

  565. Pimping out my favourite Charity postpals.co.uk

    It is a charity for children (and their siblings) in the UK. The request is not financial (for the most part) but simply time based – send a letter to a child – as post often brightens up someones day

  567. My brother and sister-in-law have a blog/Zazzle empire where they write and make stuff about Arrested Development, sloths, robot overlords, the Oregon Trail, and DIY weddings. Not quite as funny as Beyonce, but we can’t all be The Bloggess. That would just be confusing. https://www.facebook.com/NothingMundane

  568. EYH- Expanding Your Horizons. Professionals encourage young girls and women to enter STEM fields. Find a chapter near you at: expandingyourhorizons.org

  570. I am actually starting a new web series with a local videographer called “Teach Me How.” It’s going to be kind of hilarious at its best and detrimentally boring at its worst. I’d love to have you on one of the episodes…and I’m in your neck of the woods:)

  573. Can I pimp my daughter? Not for sex of course. She’s a 2013 NYU grad in Romance Languages Italian and French, loves fashion, social media, pop culture, boy bands, and journalism AND IS STILL UNEMPLOYED. I didn’t pay top tier tuition for her to work in a bakery shop. Got a job in Manhattan? Let me know and I’ll shoot her your contact information. Drcarolyn.faulknerbeitzel@gmail.com. Thanks Jenny. I love your book.

  580. I’m here to pimp votes for my dear friends daughter; Kira Young. She’s the only US finalist in the Horseware Grassroots Rider contest which ends on March 25; 7 pm in Texas time. Vote for Kira at blog.horseware.com because she’s a super cool girl who deserves to win and she has pet rats.

  582. Pimping my daughter…for a job! 2013 NYU grad still unemployed. Speaks Italian and Frech, loves to write, market, PR, boy bands, fashion, and social media. Have a job or know of a contact in Manhattan, ring me up. Drcarolyn.faulknerbeitzel@gmail.com

  585. Okay, here is my plug, for which I have zero shame. There is a very nice lady I know who has stage 4 cancer and was robbed of all her musical instruments while she was at chemo. She loves to invite other musicians to her house and just jam. She’s 88 years old, and you would love her, because she’s a hoot. These instruments were not insured and some, such as the violin given to her by her father, are impossible to truly replace, but her friends are trying. http://www.gofundme.com/78owug

  589. I write nothing about babies. Ok, well I might write about a baby if it were a really ugly baby and I had an uncomfortable moment with the mother of the really ugly baby. I write about other stuff, almost exclusively. Oh, and I refuse to sell you a purse. Or jewelry. And I don’t crochet. I don’t even know what that is, really. http://amycoryblog.wordpress.com

  591. I am trying to win a scholarship to Stationery Academy! #StatAcad #cpaperie
    Thanks!

  592. I just wanted to share that self-pollinating a squash is called “selfing.” I looked up from my gardening catalog and asked my husband if he’d been “selfing” lately. He looked offended… or maybe guilty. 🙂 Because sharing is caring.

  594. “My god, it’s full of startups…”

    I’d like to pimp my new online sports team, The Forum Tropebloggers. Except I just made them up, so there’s nothing to pimp, literally or figuratively. I really need to get my shit together so I can pimp it properly someday.

  599. Hi there! I’m an Illustrator. I have an etsy store full of all my artwork. I also recently published my first Children’s book. It’s the story of an industrious young Garibaldi damselfish who builds a steam-powered contraption from the wreckage of a sunken ship in order to explore that mysterious realm above the ocean’s surface. My website is http://www.tursiart.com and my etsy store is https://www.etsy.com/shop/Tursiart Thanks for letting me pimp my stuff on your very awesome blog! You are fabooo.

  601. I don’t randomly pimp my blog, mostly because I ramble. A Lot.
    But I’m working on a series of posts about shaming, bullying, guilt, and over all crap people shouldn’t do. So, ya’ll can check it out, or don’t.
    There are no taxidermied animals on my blog. Sorry.

  602. My brother in law is a FREELANCE CARTOONIST AND ILLUSTRATOR. He is also a wonderful man, husband and father. His work is excellent.
    Http//www.okaywerun.com

  604. I don’t have anything to pimp out, I just wanted to let you know that ‘chocotaco’ is the greatest word ever to say out loud. Thanks for that! chocotaco chocotaco chocotaco…

  610. I’m still so excited to see your posts on WordPress! I run a parrot welfare blog seeking to improve the lives of captive birds. You see, they’re real psychos (in the best way possible!) and not good pets. So that’s my goal: help your average person maybe not get bitten until their arms look like a junkie’s from the scars, like mine. 😀

  612. Here’s my blog http://awesomelyunprepared.com
    It’s basically about me always feeling Awesomely Unprepared for life. Not even exciting kinds of life stuff – just the every day stuff haha. Hopefully I’m insightful, kind of funny in a dad joke kind of way and if you like adopted people who think “mummy wars” is the scourge of the earth, you might not mind it 🙂

  621. First a confession: I have never had a Chocotaco.
    Second: yay getting people drunk!
    Real post: I am wanting to start a blog/thing. Can I get any advise as to where? Squarespace? Hover! WordPress?! Anyone?? Is this thing on?? (taps computer) it will be for a blog and photo gallery. Need handholding as technology is not always friendly to me.
    Thanks.

    (I’m a big fan of wordpress. ~ Jenny)

  622. I definitely have my own shit that I want to pimp, but instead I’m posting this link. Jenna made the brave decision to leave her abusive fiancee, and has a campaign to raise money to get a fresh start. No one is obligated to donate, of course! Check her out, though, her cause (and others like hers) is totally worth it.

    http://www.gofundme.com/Jenna

  625. Well, fine then, since you are encouraging it. I’m a single girl with a blog about single girl shit and sometimes penises and stuff. Have a look if chicks with sailor mouths don’t bother you.

    http://singlegirlblogging.com

    And thanks, Jenny. You are such an inspiration 🙂

  633. Hi there! I’m an Illustrator. I have an etsy store where I sell my artwork, and I also recently published an illustrated children’s book – Fish out of Water The story of an industrious young Garibaldi damselfish who builds a steam-powered contraption from the wreckage of a sunken ship in order to explore that mysterious realm above the ocean’s surface. My website is http://www.tursiart.com and my etsy store is https://www.etsy.com/shop/Tursiart
    Thanks so much for letting me pimp my art on your awesome blog, you are faboooo!

  634. http://esperanza.org/home/ Amazing people doing great work. A micro finance institution that supplements their group lending program with initiatives that improve education, vocational training healthcare and an integrated network of social services. Helping people lift themselves out of poverty

  642. Wow, a great opportunity, and a list I hope to get through by 2015! Thanks, Jenny. 🙂
    My wife loves blogging and teaching/speaking about blogging tools. She is building a platform called I Teach Blogging. Free membership with forum, tutorials and videos. It’s a soft launch and more is added all the time.
    http://www.iteachblogging.com
    Thank you for visiting and doing a quick sign-up!!

  650. I have a kid’s book series – http://www.thecleverestmonkey.com … last Christmas I joined with some of my friends, and we donated 120 copies of my first book to Toys for Tots. This year – two more in the series are being released – I hope to donate 200 or more copies! 🙂

  651. I want to say Thank You to Jenny for allowing me/us to Pimp out our stuff on her Blog. My favorite part of the day is reading what the Bloggess has to say. You ROCK, Jenny.
    This is my Etsy Shop….I sell vintage, retro and other cool items. Come check my shop out.
    http://www.etsy.com/shop/Irishcolleen01

  653. You’ve already pimped me more than a couple times recently which completely blows my mind, however, we’re still going here. For those that don’t know, I’m dying of cancer and could use a little help. http://gfwd.at/1bzBSgR And if you don’t want to give to me then give to someone else. Show the world that the human race cares and is prepared to help those of us who have been dealt an unfortunate hand.

  654. Amazon is donating up to $1 million to charity – $5 at a time plus 0.5% of your one-time purchase via their SMILE program. Check their homepage, upper right hand corner. You can pick your charity of choice off a list. Now go, buy a pony or something expensive.

  658. I make fantastical needle felted creatures (like this rainbow unicorn) because I can’t do real jobs that you have to get out of bed to do. I also take custom orders. I’ll make almost anything (including rogue taxidermy type creatures and your favorite scifi creatures- like the dalek in my shop).
    https://www.etsy.com/shop/JRoseArt

  661. I am collecting donations for Relay for Life. I lost my dad to brain cancer in 2008, my army veteran cousin is currently fighting cancer, and just 4 days ago I lost my dog to cancer. Cancer sucks! Help me kick cancer in the ass by making a donation.

    http://main.acsevents.org/goto/jenkelley

  665. I’ve tried to click on as many links as I can, but there’s friggin’ hundreds of them already! I have Aspergers and ADD, so I can concentrate like a motherfucker right up until I can’t and then I’ve got the attention span of a plastic bag. One of those useless ones where you put something pointy in it and the whole side splits open.

    Anyway. I have a blog about Aspergers and stuff. I’m in the process of giving it an overhaul to try to make it not suck. It’s here: http://www.lettersfromaspergia.com

  666. Nothing to pimp here. Just want to say that I adore you, Jenny! If I ever publish a book, I hope you’ll do this again so I can pimp myself here. Aaaaaand I can’t believe I actually just typed that sentence. 🙂

  667. Jenny. I think you’re responsible for getting me a 300 item bulk sale (my link was way back at comment 51). The buyer didn’t come directly from here, but etsy shops that are getting more views tend to show up higher in searches, so I think I owe you big time for this! Thank you so very much for this. This one sale will earn more for me than all of my previous sales combined. I am grateful. So is my daughter. I told her we’d finally get to go to Chuck E Cheese when I get paid for this order.

  669. Love you, Jenny! As for the pimping, check out the charity I run in Tanzania, working with the orphanage we adopted our two children from, which just got funding to create a family-style children’s village for kids who can’t be reunited with family after aging out of the orphanage! It’s a HUGE deal for us, and we need support to make it happen. http://www.thesmallthings.org – thanks!

  674. I write a blog, mostly about stuff I buy (I’m addicted to subscription boxes) or whatever floats my boat (i.e. what I have bought when manic). http:// awesomepossumblogorium.blogspot.ca is the place to be and I’m on Twitter @awesposblog 🙂

  675. My friend Matt runs the Hero Construction Company. They go into schools and teach kids about being heroes not bystanders. It’s an epic movement that has implications beyond the traditional “anti bullying” programs. He’s also put together the hero round table conference to bring together workd experts on heroism. It’s awesome! http://www.theherocc.com/

  677. I want to let everyone know about an organization who helps women who are truly being pimped out. Selah Freedom helps victims if sex trafficking. You can learn more about them at selahfreedom.com.

  678. I am a someone who has a tendency to be ridiculous and over-dramtic and get into adventures because I can never seem to say “no” to something that sounds even remotely like an adventure. So naturally, I write about theatre and the arts and encouraging it in education of everyone! I write for Broadwayworld (http://www.broadwayworld.com/author/E-HReiter) and I am trying to establish my site on theatre as well at http://www.sempercasus.com

    Any readership is appreciated!
    EM

  681. I have nothing in my life to Pimp out. I wrote a poem. Will that work?

    To Age With Wisdom

    I am almost sixty now.
    Each year etched somewhere
    in the gray of my hair,
    the thickness of my waist.
    Everyday my hands look
    more like my mothers.
    And still I have not changed.
    My heart still bleeds tears
    of when I was 12. when I was
    23, when I was 36. when I was…
    I remember things now:
    Things my mother told me,
    Like yesterday, yet years ago
    About always remembering…
    “Someday you will miss me,
    Your mother is your only friend.”
    I remember the mysteries,
    things she never said.
    About the fear of being.
    Pain of losing her father young
    Pain of losing her first born
    Fear of the outside world.
    Fears of being, just being…
    No child listens to the words.
    The Parent is a god:
    The Child is an atheist.
    It is not until God is dead
    Does the child find religion

  683. Hi. My friend’s son Luke is getting a kidney after a 2+ year wait from a living donor on April 9th at Seattle Children’s Hospital. This is a military family and they are going to have mounting expenses with all the travel they have to do back and forth to hospital and things that aren’t covered by their insurance. I would appreciate it if you could help us raise $45000 to ease their financial burden.
    https://www.facebook.com/pages/Loving-Luke/363888033729729
    Transplant fund: http://tinyurl.com/oobjtq7

  684. I am on the advisory board of the You Can Do This Project. The easiest way to describe it is that it is similar to It Gets Better but for people with diabetes. It is all about being a light in someone else’s darkness. Everyone has a story to share (and everyone needs to hear some encouragement every once in a while too!).

    You can check out the videos that have been recorded and find out more about the project at http://youcandothisproject.com

  688. First? You are amazing, Jenny, and I love your writing. Second? I’d love to pimp out/shamelessly promote my blog, http://www.squareonemom.com. Sometimes it’s about my family. Other times just about random stuff. But it keeps me writing and away from reality TV shows that are embarrassing and major time-sucks. (Teen Mom 2, I’m staring directly at you.)

  689. I’ve always loved that the comments on this website are just as great as the posts. Your fans are pretty awesome people in general. Even if that includes me 😉

  694. pimping maybe not..i would like to suggest that folks donate the output from their microbially balanced colons to those less fortunate..an astonishing number of people suffer and many die from intractable diarrhea when their guts are overrun by c. difficile..in trials, all it’s taken was the introduction of some, heh heh, good shit to reverse the condition..see ‘gulp’ by mary roach for a more detailed (and far more amusing) description of the process..kinda hard to get people to hop on that bandwagon tho..i suggested that UPS might lend its tagline (‘what can brown do for you?’), but no..sigh..maybe you can help to spread the good news about sharing one’s shit w the microbially disadvantaged..btw, new reports suggest that Crohn’s has a microbial etiology as well..please help

  695. I helped fully fund this Kickstarter project for OpenBCI, a low-cost, programmable, open-source EEG platform that gives anybody with a computer access to their brainwaves. Brain-computer interfacing (BCI) is a relatively new field of science with a seemingly limitless range of applications. Medical grade BCIs are often used in assisting people with damage to their cognitive or sensory-motor functions, however, more and more we are seeing affordable BCIs emerge in neurotherapy applications that assist people with ADHD, anxiety, phobia, depression, and other common psychological ailments.
    I donated because one of the creators is the son of a friend. At my reward level, I could honor someone who suffers from a debilitating neurological or cognitive disorder. This could include: depression, anxiety, ADHD, dementia, addiction, paralysis, or any condition that can be linked to the brain. All people honored by this reward will forever be listed on their website and in the comments of the OpenBCI core code library.
    I chose you, Jenny Lawson.
    Because as The Bloggess says, “Depression Lies.” But brain waves don’t, and hopefully we can see the truth using OpenBCI.

    https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/openbci/openbci-an-open-source-brain-computer-interface-fo

  696. I’m pumping myself!!! I’m a new designer! I love love love the jewelry. I have to become financially independent and really soon. Thank you 🙂

  697. So much great stuff here. My browser is now full of tabs, and I might have to cancel the rest of my working day. And it’s all your fault.

    One of my best friends have fibromyalgia. I guess a lot of you know that’s really bad shit. She wants to be able to get around so she can go to the doctors, meetings with social services, get treatments and have some kind of a social life without going into a coma of pain and tired.

    She has access to a car, but doesn’t have the licence because that’s expensive as shit in Norway. So she’s saving up, which takes a looong time when you’re living on whatever the social services feel like giving you (hint: not much).

    So, she started a fundrazr campaign so she might get money for half her licence, at least. Every little helps, said the old lady and pissed in the sea. Can’t hurt asking you guys for help, can it?

    https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/1iVyd/ab/61EzY0

  698. Nothing to pimp out, just wanted to say that I bought your book yesterday after finding this blog a few days ago. Not via a weird google search btw. Via http://www.annewheaton.com. Which is also an awesome blog.

  699. I hopped on to pimp myself out, then got distracted by all this amazing stuff that people do, then felt bad about myself because I don’t have the talent for all this amazing stuff that people do and…where was I? Oh yeah…my travel blog. Could you have a look? I could use some blog love today xoxo thanks….http://apassportaffair.com/

  704. Okay, so I was unsure of whether or not to pimp my FundRazr campaign, but then I thought “Aw, what the hell, at least it can’t hurt, can it? No, it can’t.”
    So I’m taking my best friend in the entire world to Barcelona this June to celebrate both our 10-year anniversary in the city where we first got to know each other and my 28th birthday. Everything’s paid for, but life tends to hand you shit when you least need it, and so I started this campaign to try and make sure the basic expenses during our 15-day stay, like food, transportation, etc., are covered.
    Anything helps, and if you’ve got the time to click, have a look, share it or even donate a few bucks, I will probably love you until the end of time. Thanks!
    Link: https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/fiuq9/ab/131Kfb

  705. Risley’s poem is amazing, and could be about my own mother. Risley is a goddess.

    I just realized you really are about the only place I can read the comments. I really need to learn to quit reading them other places. Mostly they make me want to rant on LiveJournal.

    I have nothing of my own to pimp out of my own.

    Hetalia though, because it makes me laugh. Anything that can help you laugh when you are in the midst of a depression has to be good, right? It helps to pull you out of yourself.

    But also this — the University of Chicago Admissions Department got a wrapped parcel, addressed to Henry Walton Jones, Jr. They set it aside for a student worker to sort out, because they get misaddressed campus mail all the time, And some hours later the student worker put two and two together and figured out it was addressed to Indiana Jones……

    The rest, as they say, is history……
    http://uchicagoadmissions.tumblr.com/post/37809971913/indiana-jones-mystery-package-we-dont-really

    Some things just have to be shared.

  709. Pimping my Etsy shop – http://jandedoodles.etsy.com And I’m so excited because my friend asked me to make Dalek hats for her husband’s 40th birthday coming up (Doctor Who themed party, which means it’s sure to be the best party ever!)

  710. I’m working on a charity project for an organization that takes urban teens on incredible wilderness trips. Check out my (brand new) website to learn more if you’re interested in rock climbing, adventuring, or unicorns!

  711. I’m working on a special charity project with Climbing magazine to send urban teens on wilderness trips. If you’re interested in rock climbing, adventuring, or unicorns check out my (brand new) website to learn more! Sunnieclimbsforacause.com

  713. Can I pimp for someone else? I work for a college and one of my amazing student assistants, Jennifer Wachala, is trying to earn a spot to go to Guatemala with Smile Train to help kinds with cleft lips and palates. She herself was born with a cleft lip and is studying to be a pediatric plastic surgeon to help others. PLEASE vote for her to be able to help others!
    http://social.kaptest.com/competition/657/one-million-smiles#pic277

  715. We’re working to get a handicap accessible home built for an incredible mom who has 3 kids in wheelchairs. After 2 1/2 years the home is almost ready. We could really use some help with providing voice activated features that will make dramatic changes for the boys. http://buildingadreaminthecountry.com/

  716. Tri-County Collie Rescue (www.collierescue.com). Because Lassie. And because I’m the Treasurer and the vet bills are unreal.

  720. Pimping out my sister-in-law’s website, “Evan’s Crew” dedicated to fundraising for DIPG, a “terminal upon diagnosis” pediatric cancer that took her son, my nephew. He was the bomb. A crazy bomb. A crazy bomb that would have blown up this universe with his awesomeness. http://www.evanscrew.org/

  722. I feel like saying you’re inspiring sort of diminishes how f’ing funny you are, makes you sound sort of nun-like which you’re like completely not. So I’ll say thanks for making me laugh and thanks for inspiring me to be brave enough to put my shit out there. xos

  726. I don’t have anything of my own to promote but I recently discovered the Honest Toddler and now believe that whomever this person is must be the second-funniest person on earth (after Jenny, of course). Check out http://www.thehonesttoddler.com, although the funniest stuff comes through twitter so check it out.

  730. Dang, you people are awesome. I have seen so many neat Etsy shops, read a lot of stories, left a bunch of blog comments, and even voted for a girl and her horse. Thanks for doing this, Jenny!

    And if 686+ comments aren’t enough for you: my friend Kerry talks about books, food, and interviews awesome creative ladies, Vickie knows everything ever about beauty products, and you’re missing out on some awesome geekiness if you don’t already read EPBOT.

  731. All I have to pimp is my blog, which has been my therapy substitute/aid for years now. If you don’t mind reading about the random musings, dreams, epiphanies, rants and daily life of a complete stranger, do drop by. I didn’t even know what post to pick to pimp it, and I’m sorry I don’t have more pictures (Alice would hate this). Maybe if someone ever reads it I’ll get a chance to know how to make it better.

    TL;DR? I have a blog too. Check it out!

    http://linathumbe.blogspot.com

  735. I’ll pimp my blog out… or even just that last post. Everybody has their down days. Let’s share. 🙂

  736. I’d like to suggest the National Mothers Center – they work to represent moms and families on work-life issues, dealing with the transition to motherhood, and they are a great organization to support.

  739. I really don’t have anything to pimp, but my daughter’s book series, “The Misadventures of Misery” will be released soon so…

    You think your day was bad?
    Try falling in a puddle, burning breakfast, going without hot water, getting caught in a mini-monsoon, being chased by a raccoon, falling in another puddle, having your broom catch on fire while sweeping the porch, getting locked out of the house (twice), and having light bulbs shatter when you walk by.

    All before noon.

    Poor Misery!

    “The Misadventures of Misery”. Coming soon, folks.
    Thanks, Jenny!

    (I’ll buy it. ~ Jenny)

  740. If you live in Georgia, check out the Humane Society of Forsyth County. Lots of adoptable pets ready for their forever homes. They also have a website to donate if you can’t adopt. Forsythpets.org
    Thanks all and thanks Jenny!

  742. My browser is now FULL of open tabs. There is some amazing stuff here, omigod.

    Pimping myself for a second, I make lots and lots of jewelry in all price points. Use coupon code BLOG20 for 20% off with no minimum purchase. http://www.waterwaif.com

    Now I am off to inspect all of these tabs!

  743. My browser is FULL of tabs from all of these amazing links! I can’t wait to explore them all.

    For my pimpage, I made lots of pretty jewelry in all price points, from simple flower earrings to big gemstone pieces. Use coupon code BLOG20 and get 20% off with no minimum purchase required. http://www.waterwaif.com

    Thank you, Bloggess! ♥

  744. So I hurt my back over the weekend and have spent the last few days laying in bed and not moving so I got to catch up on some reading. Hence the two books I would like to pimp out. One is A Dance with Dragons, which took me forever to finish but was so awesome and I’m so excited about how much I know about Game of Thrones now. And two is your book which I bought at Christmas time but finally started yesterday. I was laughing so much that I actually had to put the book down because my back was hurting too much to laugh.

    SO thank you for that 🙂

  751. Bloggess, your blog makes me happy every week, so thank YOU.

    Anyway, the only thing I have to pimp out this week is the game company my friends and I have recently started. Our first board-game goes on sale in a month, and we’re pretty excited. It has demons and magic and fighting evil and stuff, check it out. 🙂 http://roan-arts.com

  752. Can I pimp out something that isn’t quite ready to pimp out? A pre-pimping, if you will. My etsy shop, Three Apple Designs, will be opening soon. The shop contains handmade wallets (for men and women), tote bags, and my specialty is handmade custom felt patches. These patches are often adorable animals or nerdy. Batman tote bag or Doctor Who bow tie wallets, anyone? The link will lead you to the store’s Facebook page where some of my stuff can be checked out and the shop’s opening will be announced.

    I’d also like to pimp out pinball machines just because they’re awesome and there should be more around. Specifically, in my living room.

  753. Interested in a great, soon-to-be-released fantasy novel?

    Check out “Wytchfire” by Michael Meyerhofer. Epic. Badass. Awesomesauce.

  755. Well since you’re INVITING promotion…

    My humor book, I Thought We Agreed to Pee in the Ocean, was released in September by Martlet and Mare Books. Here’s a link:

    http://www.amazon.com/Thought-Agreed-Pee-Ocean-Sweatpants/dp/0615844146/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1395853308&sr=8-1&keywords=i+thought+we+agreed+to+pee+in+the+ocean

    We have a similar tendency to invite readers to laugh at our misfortunes, although your experiences are more unique than mine. Thanks for contributing joy to the world, and for being a counter argument to the claim that women aren’t funny.

  757. Thank you for this, Jenny. So many of your readers are hilarious. I’m not one of them. But I think pop culture is important and I started a new blog about it called Old Ain’t Dead. It’s at http://oldaintdead.com. It’s called Old Ain’t Dead because I’m old. I’m also opinionated. I really hope a few people will discover my blog and join in the conversation there. If they do, I’ll arrange for you to get a taxidermied prairie dog or something equally stuffed.

  758. I’m a fairy storyteller – I tell fairy tales to kids. The hubs and I shaved our heads to raise money for pediatric cancer research. So far I have agreed to dye my stubble purple and wear a tutu, because doing good does not require a lot of dignity. Donations still open – we’ve saved you a spot with all the cool kids who are totally chipping in! http://www.stbaldricks.org/teams/mypage/92292/2014

  762. Pimping out my favorite charity: ModestNeeds.org. It provides 1-time grants to pay bills (paid directly rather than to the person) to help keep people out of poverty, and all applicants are completely vetted before acceptance. A little money can have a direct, positive effect on someone’s life.

  766. My name is M. Turner. I’m 36 and live in Florida with my guy and three cats. I own PhoenixFire Designs and you can find my etsy shop here: http://www.PhoenixFireDesigns.etsy.com

    You can also find more such as previous custom orders and updates here: http://www.TreeofLifePendants.com

    I have been making jewelry for over a decade and selling part-time on etsy since 2006, but took the plunge to do it full time after major surgery in 2011. At age 34, I had to have a total laparoscopic hysterectomy due to nearly 3lbs of tumors in my uterus. My then day-job laid me off while I was in recovery saying they couldn’t hold my job for me. I decided to try being a small handmade business owner for real at that point and it’s been the best decision I ever made.

    I specialize in tree of life pendants and other wire wrapped jewelry including bird nest pendants, earrings, bridal pieces and more. Everything is made from scratch by my two hands out of my home studio in Tampa Bay Florida.

    A friend was nice enough to buy an add here a couple months ago for me so if the name seems familiar, that might be why!

  769. Pimping for a good cause: In 2012, this really awesome lady battled breast cancer while pregnant with her super cute kiddo. Today, she’s fighting cancer again and we’re trying to raise $10k to help her with medical bills – Every little bit, every share, helps! http://www.gofundme.com/7pa2vs

  773. I totally read that as chocolate tattoo, which, how would one do that?
    ‘Cause I would totally get a chocolate tattoo!

  777. Pimpin’ my friend Heather’s Happy Lane Soap Company-http://bathehappy.com
    Spreading happiness across the globe through natural hand-made soaps and beauty supplies. All of the products are paraben and sulphate free!

  778. We’re pimping? Where’s my fedora? Well, okay, here we go. I wrote a post I’m pretty dang proud of today about The Conscious Uncoupling Of An Unconscious Coupling Of a Totally Self Conscious Couple. Guess who? http://elleroywashere.com/2014/03/26/the-conscious-uncoupling-of-an-unconscious-coupling/#comment-45075 That’s at my blog http://elleroywashere.com Also? I co-edit a groovy pop culture website called Lefty Pop. Check it out, won’t you? http://leftypop.com.

    Thanks for the World Class Pimping Jenny! ’twas generous of you! 🙂

  785. My husband and I have a dream to move to Edinburgh, Scotland, and we are shamelessly, but with deep gratitude asking for help to make it happen. I promise really cool shit if you are able to pitch in! Read our story at http://www.gofundme.com/5scpok

    Thanks, Jenny for giving all of us this chance to reach out to one another. 🙂

  786. I was going to start a how-to travel website, but instead I just wrote a bunch of stories about myself vaguely disguised as informational posts about a Greek island. So then my website partner kinda dumped me for my lack of focus. And then I decided eff that, I’m pimping with The Bloggess. So read my travel blog. It rocks. http://www.traveltosamos.com

  788. Love the blog, and thank you for allowing us to pimp our stuff,
    We’ve got a Spring sale coupon code to offer you wonderful people; spend £15 or more and use code SPRING2014 to receive a 20% discount on your order!

    Code is valid until April 30th 2014

    So come on by:
    http://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/KasumiCrafts

    We do free UK Shipping, and £4 (+50p per additional item) to the US & Rest of the world.

  792. Well, if anyone gets down this far, I’ll pimp my Friends Jewerly. She made a special order for me and I’m pleased.
    http://black-rabbit-studio.com/
    And as always, I have a blog that covers what ever I feel like talking about…. Between moving to Kentucky, movie reviews and tech stuff for friends – it’s okay.

  799. You’re the best and I’m glad this month is getting better for you!

    I help run a very small non-profit that helps people learn how to deal with their insurance company after a disaster. It might sound like a crazy concept until you lose a house to a disaster then you realize it’s the most important non-profit you’ll ever run into (I know because it happened to our family).

    Our website is http://www.carehelp.org If you know someone who has lost a house that was insured one of the most helpful thing you can do is tell them about our website and maybe even buy our book for them. You can actually get the eBook for free on our website but we held a seminar once and a couple of people had downloaded it and printed it which cost them almost $20 so I posted it on Amazon for as cheap as they’d let us.

    http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008UKJT2M/ref=as_li_ss_til?tag=carehelp-20&camp=0&creative=0&linkCode=as4&creativeASIN=B008UKJT2M&adid=0FT4P3YKW5Z0VMQQK16C

  800. Holy CRAP!!! I didn’t realize the link would put such a big picture. I’m really sorry about that!

  801. If you read this far, please consider supporting my newest favorite cause, Rocky Ridge Refuge: http://rockyridgerefuge.com

    What Janice does for these animals is nothing short of amazing. Thank you. And thank you, Jenny.

  803. I started a blog – I haven’t posted much of anything for a long time (insert excuse here…).
    Thank you Jennie for inspiring me to start again.
    Please subscribe. I’ll try to make it worth your while. Thank you.

  812. After 7 years of training, a 2nd college degree, and finally quitting my corporate job in 2013, I custom-cut gemstones and make custom jewelry. I’m at http://www.facetsandfrosting.com

    Jenny, thanks for being the spokesperson for being yourself. It took me waaayyyy too long to follow that advice.

  814. Jenny~ How amazing are you? Well pimping is always okay with me…. unless I have to actually have to leave the house… in PJs. But I am pimping my company for anyone who needs our services, no cost to you we figure out the lowest rates in electricity (commercial and residential) and read all the fine print… then you can choose who you want! If you don’t know if you have a choice, come check out our company. Thanks Jenny.. Fellow Crusader to Right the Wrongs and to kick any bad day in the junk. You have no idea how many times I have snarfed coffee up the nose reading your tweets too!

  816. I started my blog Pretend You’re Good At It because I saw The Bloggess at a bookstore event, and she said Neil Gaiman told her to “pretend you’re good at it” when she was doing the recording for her audio book. So, now I’m pretending to be a good (enough) parent and writer.

    http://pretendyouregoodatit.com

  821. Thanks so much for this opportunity! I’m using it to shamelessly plug my beauty blog: Anna’s Makeup Oasis. I do stuff like paint my Mum’s lips orange and green to do a Hunger Games look, tell people what not to waste their hard-earned money on or just share a gorgeous look inspired by the latest James McAvoy film I’ve seen!

    Take thee here, if you love all things beauty: http://annasmakeupoasis.typepad.com/amo/

  823. Thanks for this opportunity, Jenny! I’m pimping out my neighbor’s Etsy site, which I helped him create. He’s a disabled veteran who makes beautiful wood boxes and urns and loves working with people to create custom wood products: http://www.etsy.com/shop/petesurns

  825. I will definitely pimp my jewelry shop because it’s a hella expensive hobby: http://www.etsy.com/shop/marieleejewelry
    We have beaded necklaces and earrings, rings made with vintage buttons and lapel pins, and a bunch of earrings made with a wide variety of dangling charms, from anime-looking animals (penguins, pigs, crabs–seriously, they’re the most adorable crab earrings, they’re linked below) to cupcakes to mustaches to teacups.

    Also, I’ll pimp John Hodgman’s comedy special “Ragnarok” (currently available on Netflix Canada, possibly on US Netflix too?), and the young-adult author Elizabeth Wein who’s written two wonderful books about young female pilots in WWII, “Code Name Verity” and “Rose Under Fire”. They’re related (some characters show up in both), but you don’t actually have to read one before the other.

  828. Pimpin’ my shit! I’m a ceramist and potter. I’ve been lucky to get a couple pieces of mine in two international competitions and one museum, but my real love is for Hallowe’en ceramics. Here’s my shop:
    https://www.etsy.com/shop/ShellHawksCreations

    The Hallowe’en stuff starts really coming out in September and October. I’ll be at Halloween and Vine in Petaluma in September, and maybe Scare LA in August.

    And? Y’all do freaking amazing stuff!

  830. My co-worker hasn’t been able to finish his degree due to financial constraints. He’s fantastic and does a tremendous amount to help keep things running smoothly around our office. More details here: http://www.gofundme.com/7shn7k

  835. http://www.margosolod.com Coyote Summer, my new ‘tween adventure novel. got a kid that wishes he or she could have adventures alone, no pesky adults? this one will do it. warning: no witches or werwolves or swordfights or zombies. just a good old fashioned adventure.

  838. I’m not creative enough to have my own business, but I’m really good at home party sales!

    If your house smells bad but your in-laws are coming soon: kcwilliams.scentsy.us
    If you like cheese or chocolate (in other words, if you’re alive): kcwilliams.velata.us

  841. Okay. I will give it a shot. I have a book I am trying to write. It is a non-fiction account of what happened to a friend of mine. It is written from my perspective. I spent two years supporting him emotionally and ghost-writing his legal documents, and it is a story I think should be heard.

    http://www.gofundme.com/3957u0

    Read the page and let me know if you think it’s a worthwhile endeavor. Thanks.

  842. Nail polish! I am pimping my indie nail polish line, MicroBrews Nail Polish. Visit microbrewsnailpolish.bigcartel.com to see what I have in stock. It’s a passion project of mine and I’d like some support. -W

  845. My son has been battling a rare hard to treat bone cancer since December 2012. He is currently 6 months cancer free, (yah!) but after close to a year of extremely high dose chemotherpay and surgery to remove his distal femur and replace it and his knee with a metal implant, losing most of his hearing and now possibly having seizures, at 19 he is suddenly having to face a new career path (he was a welder for the city, but can no longer do that with metal implants) and has to go back to school. Right now and for the past 7 months we have been supporting him and paying all of his bills. If anyone would like to help him, you can leave comments of support on his page facebook.com/goteamjeremy or help him with his staggering medical bills we would be forever appreciative <3 http://www.gofundme.com/Team-Jeremy

  848. Thanks for the pimpin’ chance, you’re awesome! I’m just getting started with my blog but I’m really excited about it. Did I Say That Out Loud? http://bigfunnygirl.blogspot.com/
    Mostly crazy lady musings and other sarcastically funny crap. BTW, I’ve found so many new and awesome blogs to follow from this thread…thanks again!

  853. Thank YOU Jenny. Thank you for being you! Thank you for being human, real, kind and honest! How can I forget funny! Thank you for making me laugh! I have especially needed it these past years : )

    I’d like to (hmmm…I think pimp might not be the write word ; ) tell you about our two girls. Our dog and our daughter. It’s the most amazingly bittersweet story about the deepest love, and the loss of both of them.

    http://www.avianareese.com/2013/11/circle-of-love.html

  854. I’m pimping my blog, because I can. It’s about urbex, books, and Canadian history. I am going to be giving away a brand-new book by a Canadian horror author, so keep checking for updates!

  857. Jenny, I just want to thank YOU for making me feel less alone in this world.

    I know I’m late to this post, so it probably won’t be seen by many. I’m still going to try though. My family is facing eviction and we could really use help. http://www.gofundme.com/7t9q58

  863. I’m an artist who creates scientifically inspired paintings out of beeswax. The paint is called encaustic and it’s an ancient medium that you use heat and flame to manipulate. My work involves insects, bones, anatomy, cells, diatoms, and plants. If you check out my website I have an Etsy shop, a Society 6 store, Twitter, Tumblr, and a Facebook page! I’m open for commissions as well so contact me and we’ll set something up. http://www.chantelgreene.com/

  864. I am pimping out the book I wrote (OK….just started it TODAY, but already on Chapter 2). Can you recommend a good editor?….I’m sure I’ll need one. AND a publisher?….I’m sure it will be published. Thanks…luv you.
    barbara.kolodgie@dlapiper.com

    Don’t let the law firm email address scare you…..I’m not one of them.

  865. Thank you, Jenny!!! You guys are invited to stop in and visit me at http://www.thenutshelllibrarian.com for stories narrated by an imperfect parent, her saucy baby sidekick, and (occasionally) the dog. Here is a recent one in the voice of my sarcastic, albeit charming baby girl: http://thenut.thenutshelllibrarian.com/2014/03/my-parents-brand-of-heroin.html. We review children’s books, too: http://thenut.thenutshelllibrarian.com/2014/03/the-peanut-gallery-librarian.html.

  870. mmmmm Chocotaco! I haven’t had one of those since middle school. And now that I am craving something that I don’t even know if I can still find, I feel you owe me… so here’s my easy shop:
    https://www.etsy.com/shop/KatMariee
    All original painting and jewelry made from said paintings.

    (there is a blog too, (katmariee.com) but I have an 8 month old and babies are freaking demanding!)

  872. I have a random stream of consciousness blog. If you read it, please comment and let me know whether you liked it.

    Cheers.

  873. OMG…it will take me three weeks to check out all the cool stuff being pimped here! Awesome!

    I’ve had a rough couple of weeks and completely stopped reading my blogs, so I’m late to this little pimp party. Bummer.

    Still, just a in case anyone gets this far, go check out my blog CradleRockingMama.com. I try to bring the funny to the very unfunny food allergies and intolerances my kiddos suffer with. Plus I share recipes and useful tips. Not nearly as funny as Jenny, of course, but there’s only so funny you can get with hospital visits. The boys help, though. My kids are a laugh a minute! Love you, Jenny! You keep my head on straight when things get tough.

  874. Body wraps that tighten and tone in 45 MINUTES!!!! Also other great creams and supplements for the body!

  878. I have a humor blog 1funnychick.com I think you would enjoy it. Lots of original content. A lot of stuff to keep you laughing.

  881. This is a very good post and is informative in nature. However, we can deliver you expert guidance on planning marketing activities and other related academic assignment writing. You just need to visit our page by clicking on the link https://penmypaper.com/

  884. I like how the writer organized his thoughts in addition to he visual part.

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