ANGRY POLLS (Volume I)

At least once a day Victor and I have a disagreement about something ridiculous and I always wish that I had all of the internet in the car with us to tell Victor that he’s insane, or to tell me that my hair looks nice.  I’ve decided to start sharing these disagreements here in the form of polls because I think it was Gandhi who said “The secret to a happy marriage is to drag in lots of strangers to join in your bloody conflicts.”

This week’s big disagreement was about the fact that he likes powdered donuts and I hate them.  I explained that powdered sugar makes my mouth unnaturally cold and was probably made by evil wizards.  He argued that powdered sugar did no such thing to him and that I was insane.  I argued that powdered sugar makes everyone’s mouth cold and that if I ever decided to run a marathon I’d carry a bunch of powdered sugar to sprinkle on my body whenever I got overheated.  He argued that I would never run a marathon.  He won that particular argument.

But the powdered sugar question still stands, so please be honest:

 

Added educational bonus:  If you’re one of the people afflicted with “my-mouth-thinks-powdered-sugar-tastes-like-refrigerated-poison”, here is the best explanation I found on reddit: powderedsugar

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And now, time for the weekly wrap-up: Graphic by Round Table Companies Shit I made in my shop (Named “EIGHT POUNDS OF UNCUT COCAINE” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):

Shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:

Shit you should buy or steal because it’s awesome:

This week’s wrap-up is brought to you by an amazing anonymous company who wants to encourage you to give back to your favorite charity site.  Maybe it’s freerice, or Heifer, or Climb Out of the Darkness.   My personal favorite is Project Night Night, which provides homeless children with a new security blanket, a book, and a stuffed animal all nestled inside a new canvas tote bag.  You can sponsor an entire Night Night Package for a homeless child for just $25 online, or if you can’t afford that then use your voice to promote your own favorite charity to others.  This might be my favorite sponsored post ever.
 Thank you for being awesome.

147 thoughts on “ANGRY POLLS (Volume I)

Read comments below or add one.

  1. The other box wasn’t nearly long enough! My full answer was to be, No, but I once almost asphyxiated on powdered sugar inhaled from a donut while in the middle of a bout of hysterical laughter, so while I’m not on board with the cold part I totally agree it’s made by evil wizards.

  2. Ahh! I was told this only happens to me, glad I am not alone!! 🙂 Now to go find a doughnut…

  3. I really have to put the word “donuts” in some kind of online filter to prevent me from reading about them. I’m trying to be good….must not eat powdered or unpowdered. I think you can guess my vote.

  4. …. so cold. In fact, if you try to lick the powdered sugar off a donut, your tongue will stick. I just made that up. I don’t know. I don’t go around licking donuts…

  5. Hmmm I have to both agree and disagree with you. Powdered sugar does feel slightly cool for me but this is EXACTLY the reason I prefer it on the doughnuts. Actually I think covering donuts with sugar frosting is a CRIME; it should either be powdered sugar or just straight go crazy with chocolate or something.

  6. It does make my mouth feel cold AND that’s why I like them. I feel like I’ve somehow lost both sides of the argument.

  7. “Ballsack sloughing off” is now my new phrase to indicate when things have gone horribly, terribly wrong…and I don’t even HAVE a ballsack!

  8. While I’ve never had my mouth get cold because of powdered sugar donuts, I DO think of them as feeling cool. But I also refrigerate Cheetos, Doritos & cheese it’s because otherwise my mouth gets hot, soooooo….

  9. It doesn’t make my mouth feel cold, but donuts should really have caster sugar n them, not icing sugar.(I think in American this means superfine sugar, not powdered sugar?)
    Also, I really want donuts now, and it is nearly 10 O’Clock at night and the local shop is closed. Grrrr.

  10. First off, your hair looks nice. 🙂

    I’ve never really considered the cold factor. I just generally don’t like them because they’re unnecessarily messy, thus a pain in my ass. But now I feel like I need to see for myself.

    And that was a fun science lesson, I learned something today! Thank you.

  11. You know it’s a good thing I already had donuts in my house, so I don’t have to drive anywhere to get some. Now I’ll just get fat..ter, don’t judge me.

  12. I ran out of room in the Other section of your poll…I wanted to say “I hadn’t noticed that, but you’re probably right. You always are, you brilliant person, you! Also, your hair looks spectacular. Like drop dead gorgeous. (But please don’t drop dead.)”

    (Also, I’m loving the sponsored post, too!) Good luck with the donut battle!

  13. The Other line wouldn’t let me fill in my complete answer, which was: “This poll made me walk all the way into the kitchen to get powdered sugar to put on my tongue to test the hypothesis. Since I didn’t have any powdered sugar, it was a wasted trip, so I vote No Comment.”

  14. I love powered donuts, until I look at my shirt and it looks like I just f*cked up a line of cocaine. I haven’t noticed a cold feeling. Now I need donuts to experiment. Geez Jenny I’m on a diet!

  15. If it takes more energy to process the powdered sugar…wouldn’t that mean you would be burning calories while eating said doughnut? Win for the powdered doughnut…but your hair really does look nice.

  16. When I eat powdered sugar donuts I feel like they’re sucking all the moisture out of my mouth. And somehow they make me fat, too.

    Definitely some sort of weird voodoo going on there.

  17. It comes as absolutely no shock to me that “now I want donuts, asshole” is winning. I’m actually disappointed in anyone who reads your blog and clicked anything else. They should be punished, perhaps by not being allowed to eat donuts ever. More for me.

  18. Isn’t it just a foregone conclusion that your hair looks nice? And why would anyone eat powdered sugar donuts when Krispy Kreme is an option?

  19. Yeah we have the same arguments. The oldest one is going on 11 years: if a bear and a killer whale got into a fight, who would win?

  20. You are right as always. Proud to submit my vote and bring the count up to 298 to 297 in your favor. And your hair looks fabulous.

  21. Great stuff! My husband and I nearly divorced over an argument about the metric system. My claim to marriage fame.

  22. Interesting. Excuse me while I go buy Tim Hortons out of powdered donuts to test this hypothesis properly. I guess I’ll have to poll some evil wizards about their powdered sugar interests as well, just to cover all the bases. I don’t know where I’ll find the evil wizards, but at least I’ll have something to eat while I search.

  23. Also?? The Hostess chocolate coated ones make me feel like someone greased the roof of my mouth and then rubbed it with dust bunnies.

    Does this stop me from eating them??

    Hell no.

  24. Haven’t noticed a cold reaction, but haven’t had powdered donuts in a few years.

    Totally agree with the comment above about choking on powdered sugar though. It’s like the Mythbusters test where Kari tried to swallow a bunch of cinnamon without choking to death.

    Don’t know about your hair today, but it looked fabulous on Friday at BlogHer ’14. Of course, that might just have been the corpse hair I was noticing.

  25. Have you seen Of Dolls & Murder? It’s on netflix and was my introduction to the nutshells. Can I want to be someone who died before I was born? Genius of a woman.

    I love that you have polls that include answers like “now I want donuts,” because who doesn’t want donuts after someone mentions them? The downfall of most polls is that they don’t give realistic answer options.

  26. Powdered donuts gum up my mouth just like peanut butter gums up a dog’s mouth. I’m too busy digging out the ness to notice hot vs. cold. What they do to my mouth is just plain unnatural, not to mention the inevitable and unholy mess they make on (always) dark clothing. Ugh. Glazed or frosted only!! And why can’t they make the powder in different colors, anyway?? Seriously.

  27. Haven’t really ever considered whether powdered donuts feel cold, I only eat them when that’s the only kind left in the carton. BUT, that quote, my dear, was not from Gandhi, it’s pure Zsa Zsa.

  28. I’m with Pangolin at #2.
    Powdered sugar is an ingredient, not a valid donut topping.

  29. Victor needs to get a referral from his dentist so that he can see a specialist about how his mouth doesn’t work right when he eats powdered sugar.

    But more importantly, powdered sugar is messier than the delight it provides can make up for. Once it’s out, you can’t ever really clean it up. It’s the glitter of the cooking world.

  30. I think you must be in that whatever percent of people that thinks cilantro tastes like soap. Also that whatever percent of people that thinks Reddit is a reliable source. <3

  31. I have no idea b/c I don’t ever chose powdered- too damn messy! But I asked my husband who said,”Oh totally!” So I used his reply for mine since you don’t have that as an option. But now I do want (non-powdered) donuts so I guess I could’ve chosen that one. But I’d never call you an asshole so I couldn’t choose that one. Wait, what was the question?

  32. First of all, anything with a powder on it sucks– as in doritos, cheetos, powdered donuts. Second of all, I’m FLABBERGASTED that the poll answer I chose, “I have never had powdered sugar in my life and also I’m a complete liar”, is the least checked answer. Because it’s obviously the right answer. Third of all, thank you for including the Reddit thread, I learned something AND I have an indelible image in my mind that I will forever treasure. And I’m sure your hair is fine, geeez.

  33. Thanks for the ‘behind the scenes’ gifs. Is it weird that I’m a little disappointed an actual person doesn’t personally sharpen each little pencil by hand? I had imagined an entire room filled with old school crank sharpeners and muscular Russian men cranking them out (to Maddona’s RESPECT YOURSELF video) for use at mini-golf courses around the world.

  34. I have never observed the coldness factor, but I don’t care for powdered sugar donuts for two reasons: they’re not chocolate, and they don’t have any chocolate in them. Dunkin Donuts makes a powdered-sugar donut which is filled with a thick chocolate buttercream, and THOSE I like. So…

    But inasmuch that I actually want donuts now, I chose that answer, although I’m not sure I’d use the insult. Maybe.

  35. Interesting, I’ve never heard the cold mouth/powdered sugar thing before. I do, however, hate powdered sugar because I alway take a breath before I stuff donuts in my pie hole and then I’m inhaling powdered sugar and coughing. You can argue that I’m the wink link in that chain but I prefer to blame the powdered sugar.

  36. I had a father-in-law who claimed to be allergic. Guess whose cooking constantly contained powdered sugar every time they were in town? And guess who never had a reaction? This is why he’s my EX FIL….because I’m a sneaky sneak, and they were crybaby liars.

  37. I totally read the title of the book as “The Nutshell Undies of Unexplained Death”. Undies… snerk Now I kind of want a pair of undies with nuts printed on them.

  38. Cinnamon donuts make my mouth itchy. In a delicious way tho. Can we get science on that one?

  39. Well I am going to promote a charity/fundraiser.

    I am scared of heights (I have horrible diagnosed anxiety and phobias) and I am doing a charity skydive in order to raise awareness for Multiple sclerosis since my friend who has MS has a huge day coming up. (Wedding!) So I am doing it for her. She’s honoured of course especially since she knows how bad my anxiety level is.

    http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/melsmarsh/charity-skydive2 is the donation page.

  40. It doesn’t make your mouth cold if you snort it. Practical jokes can be fun, and informative, too.
    Remember those cookies called “Lemon Coolers”? I think the powdered sugar coating was supposed to be the “cooler” part, so you are probably right. And your hair does look great.

  41. They make my mouth dry and when I drink milk to hydrate, the powdered sugar clumps in my mouth. This, and the fact I make a huge mess when I eat them, is why I choose a simple glazed doughnut every time.

  42. Wow, Jenny, your hair looks gorgeous today!
    (Now can I get an advance copy of your book when it’s ready?)

  43. yes, and I aspirate the powdered sugar. And also, whenever I see a powdered donut I am reminded of the book “Flowers in the Attic” and I am certain someone is sprinkling arsenic on my donut. So no. I don’t eat them. EVIL!

  44. I’ve been on a diet for 6 weeks now. So, ummmmmm….donuts. I don’t remember if powdered sugar makes my mouth cold. I don’t remember what sugar tastes like at all. Sigh.
    Diets are stupid.

  45. P.S. Reconcile Victor to his oddity by telling him that the reason that powdered sugar doesn’t make his mouth cold is because his supreme hotness neutralizes the sugar-coldness. He will have no possible answer.

  46. Obviously you have not had the pleasure of buying a package of Freihoffers donuts. The come in packages of 12 and include plain, powdered sugar, and cinnamon sugar. They are delicious and go best with apple cider. I live in Texas and so far I have only seen them up north in upstate NY. I miss powdered sugar donuts. Now I want some.

  47. Yes. So cold. Which is why I only eat them if I have hot coffee.

  48. Well duh! The cold comes from the hidden cyanide that’s slowly poisoning all powdered sugar donut eaters everywhere.

    PS Loooooved meeting you. 🙂

  49. As long as it’s not filled with toothpaste, a donut is a donut! 🙂 Give one to Mabel! She needs variety in her diet.

  50. In case Victor doesn’t believe what is said in forums. Here is an explanation of the science, compiled from information contained the references cited at the bottom. (Note: The first cite references a book on science concepts for 5 to 10 year olds. I’m sure you could tease Victor about that.)

    The dissolution of sugar in saliva an endothermic reaction. In endothermic reactions heat is taken from the surrounding substances.

    That means when your saliva begins to dissolve the sugar, it takes heat from your tongue and mouth, making your mouth feel cold.

    To replicate this without the use of a mouth, mix icing sugar with citric acid and baking soda, 1:1:1/2 The citric acid and baking soda simulates our slightly acidic saliva.

    My guess, is that Victor may not have the same feeling because his saliva is either more acidic or less acidic than yours. If it is more acidic, you could always call him “acid tongue.” If it is less acidic. you alway say he simply base.

    https://www.deakin.edu.au/arts-ed/education/sci-enviro-ed/years5-10/pdfs/chem-react.pdf

    http://www.chem.canterbury.ac.nz/letstalkchemistry/electronicversion/electronicversionnew/chapter11/endothermic.shtml

  51. Hmmm, this could be a highly effective way of solving world conflict. If the world votes that a country is being an asshole, the country would have to stop being an asshole. Great idea!

  52. Am I the only one who noticed that the mystery gift raccoon is wearing ” a raspberry beret, the kind U find in a second hand store”. I don’t even like Prince or most any pop but I am very fond of song lyrics and they stick in my head like powdered sugar.

  53. Just shows what a healthy marriage you guys have. Most couples fight over money, bills, raising kids. I think the donut argument rates down there below putting the toilet seat down and who got the mail last.

  54. Also, where is their a photo of your hair ? Or are the comments just an in-joke I missed?

  55. I too have experienced the cold mouth thing, but I feel compelled to point out that although I don’t like powdered sugar donuts, Agent Coulson does, so I feel obligated not to diss them. Like knowing that the pipe organ was J.S. Bach’s favorite instrument, so it can’t be a total waste of time. (I do like Danish Wedding Cookies though.)

  56. I voted “no, what the hell is wrong with you?” because that sounds completely made up and I have never experienced it nor heard anyone else say their mouth was cold when eating powdered sugar. And then after I voted I read the reddit thread and felt it was at least a plausible explanation, so I would like to change my vote instead to “thanks asshole, now I want donuts.” 🙂

  57. My Other answer: I try to avoid powdered sugar, actually.

    I’m not into powdered sugar donuts (much prefer glazed or CHOCOLATE). But man, that cold mint mouth thing is terrible, especially when you have mint and then drink water after and then your mouth is on cold fire.

  58. Powdered sugar makes me choke to death and die because I’m stupid and forget to stop inhaling before I eat something with that crap on it. Same thing with cocoa powder. 33 years and I STILL haven’t learned a fucking thing. Pretty sure that’s how I’ll die one day.

  59. And now I have to explain to my husband why he just came home and saw me licking powdered sugar off a paper plate.

  60. in case you haven’t heard it today, your hair looks nice. And yeah I want doughnuts and the closest place is 20 miles from me, thanks

  61. You probably don’t want to hear how I agree with Victor on the yumminess of powered sugar donuts, so I’ll just tell you how fabulous your hair looks today.

  62. Powdered sugar donuts do make my mouth cold, but that’s not why I hate them. I hate them because there’s always so much on them, I look like Tony Montana has been doing lines of coke out of my cleavage when I’m done eating one.

  63. I wish I could have selected two answers: the one I DID select, and “now I want donuts”. 🙁
    Of course, thanks to Entemann’s having a buy one, get one sale, I HAVE two boxes of donuts that will rectify this situation.

    Mmmmmm…..blueberry donuuuuuuut.

  64. Read this to my husband…after I said it happened to me too, he says, “must be a woman thing”. Then followed that up with “know what would make your mouth warm up?”

  65. I have the solution to your dilemma: beignets. Come to New Orleans and eat beignets!

  66. I found this question being pondered on eGullet. Here was an interesting supposition:

    In the name of “Science”, I stopped by my local bakery and picked up another half dozen powdered sugar donuts this morning. I posed my question about the perceived “coolness” of powdered sugar to the women who work there.

    I mentioned the theory of corn/wheat starch, added to the sugar to prevent clumping (?), drawing out moisture. One of the women told me how they used to use corn starch on babies with diaper rash for just that reason.

    So, it would appear that our theory of starch drawing out moisture, combined with the hypothesis of “sugar, being a uniform mixture that quickly liquifies on the tongue, absorbs latent heat from the tongue, causing the perception of coolness”, could be correct?

    My background is in engineering, autos, law and crime rather than science, but I seem to recall how the Second Law of Thermodynamics posits that unless we find a way to create new matter, everything will keep getting colder all the time? Thus, eating powdered sugar donuts could ultimately contribute to the end of the Universe, but what the hell?

  67. I am so glad someone else things powdered donuts are like little round sugary Satans – I am constantly harassed (in Dunkin’ Donuts-lovin’ Boston) for hate, hate, hating all things donut-related. 🙂

  68. I’m the one who put in other that it makes me think I’m doing cocaine wrong. Seriously, I think of that scene in white chicks where she wanted some powder on her nose, and the one girl called her a coke whore. Maybe it’s because I get powdered sugar everywhere. ON my nose. Up my nose. In my hair. In my ear. On my shirt. On the crotch of my pants. and occasionally, I find half a doughnut later in my bra. It’s amazing how well your boobs can lock in the freshness.

  69. powdered donuts are creepy AND messy. victor is just plain wrong on this one. now i’m questioning why i ever sided with him in the past.

  70. I would just like to point out that my local donut shop doesn’t open for 8 MORE HOURS.

  71. I don’t think I’ve ever noticed this. Of course, now I think we need a dozen powdered donuts to see if we can replicate these results. And plain ones. That’s the control group… It’s called SCIENCE! Also chocolate ones because you can never have too much chocolate. That’s a scientific fact. Einstein proved it. E=mc^2. Yes, it can mean “Energy equals mass times the speed of light squared”, but it can also mean “enough equals your mass in chocolate squares.” As in you’ll have eaten enough chocolate when you’ve eaten the equivalent of your mass in chocolate squares.

    Since I majored in Physics back in college (for one semester – until I crashed headlong into Quantum Mechanics), you can take everything I say as 100% scientific fact and use it in any argument in which Victor tries (foolishly) to limit chocolate intake. My price? If ever we meet in person, you buy me a donut.

  72. Ooh! Ooh! For excess capsaicin, I’ve got this: Frozen Banana Slices.
    [Me]: Ow, ow, ow! This is horrible!
    [Lynn]: You just ate a whole slice of habanero on a dare, genius. How did you think it would feel?
    [Me]: Ow, ow, ow! [rummages in freezer].
    [Lynn]: Hey! I’m saving those for banana bread! Mitts off, bozo!
    [Me]: hey, vis is wuhkin, … In fact, this is perfect! I’ve discovered the antidote! Call MIT!
    [Lynn]: Ah, jeez.

  73. I agree with you! In exchange, please back me up that pomegranate rooibos tea tastes exactly like Oscar Meyer hot dogs, because none of my friends agree and I think they may be planning some sort of intervention.

  74. It may be better to just accept that in a marriage it’s not uncommon to have a difference in tastes and perspective.
    Sure science may be on your side, but if he likes powdered doughnuts and you don’t he can eat them and you can eat what you prefer.
    On the other hand, maybe arguing about stupid stuff like this is more healthy and gets the conflicts out of the way, rather than having arguments about politics and parenting style etc.
    Not everyone likes the same thing, and I’m learning to be okay with that; besides if other people don’t like what I like it means there’s all the more of it for me.
    Let Victor have his powdered doughnut vice, I’m sure you have other vices he doesn’t agree with so it’s up to you if you want to win the argument, or let it slide and deal with the more important stuff.
    I have a similar argument with my wife; so far there are only 2 types of homebrew I make that she likes, so I know that when I brew something other than she likes I don’t have to share it with her. I call that a win win.

  75. I’ve never had a powdered donut, they don’t seem to be big in Australia, all I’ve ever seen at the donut shops are ordinary cinnamon+sugar donuts and iced donuts. Have I missed out?

  76. Funny, after all I have learned about you, that it would be powdered sugar perception that made me think you’re nuts…

  77. Tragic Sandwich #41 is completely correct and this is why I never eat powdered sugar donuts. Total genius, Tragic. It IS the glitter of the cooking world.

  78. This is hilarious! Me and my husband actually started an entire debate blog that looks a little something like this post. It was extremely cathartic…until we started picking fights just to put them up on the site. Anywho, check it out if you feel like casting your vote to help me win all the arguments. http://www.thewhatblog.com

  79. Yes, powdered sugar makes my mouth feel cold, but I like that.

    Also, your hair looks nice.

  80. Off topic but: Sure I totally want the ice cream sandwich machine but now I will never eat another hot dog again. Hot dog lovers DO NOT click on the link for the ice cream sandwich machine.

  81. I totally does that to me. But I think it’s weird that you don’t like it. It’s not made by evil wizards. It’s made by genius gnomes.

  82. Two things that I find totally pointless are powdered sugar and whip cream. They both taste like nothingness. If I am going to consume something with that much calories it better taste like SOMETHING!!!! With that being said, my fav donuts would have to be chocolate or some other kind of glazed, like strawberry or maple glazed….mmmmm

  83. Is it just me, or was the camouflage helmet-making process totally mesmerizing?

  84. It’s the same kind of science that lets rock salt make ice colder in order to make ice cream. Science is delicious!

  85. Just coming back because the comments are as funny as the post, but of course that is what holds this tribe together. I think Angry Polls is a hit, and I hope that (Volume One) is an indication that there will be more in the future. Loved this! Except the hot dig gif, I could have gone nine lives without seeing that.
    Your hair looks great today.

  86. Hey. Your hair looks nice. Loved hearing you speak at BlogHer. And everybody who is anybody knows that the only acceptable donuts to eat are maple glazed.

  87. I unhappily reside in the “powder makes me choke when I breathe” camp. I did want to do the research to see if there was scientific reasoning to support your claim, so thank you for saving me hours of internet scouring to find the answer. It’s almost worth choking again to discover if my mouth gets cold…

  88. I don’t even like donuts but I had to check the ‘now I need donuts, thanks asshole’ button. But powdered sugar on lemon squares feel cool so I’m sure it does on donuts.

  89. I want to have the internet in my car to win arguments with my husband! Best idea ever.

    Also, your hair looks really nice.

  90. attempt 2 at response. I have never noticed the cold sensation of a powdered donut as I am too busy trying to figure out how to eat the damn things without looking like I spilled cocaine all over the front of my shirt. I have considered licking it off, but this just reinforces the thought, to anyone watching, that I have indeed spilled cocaine all over my shirt.

  91. I loved this sponsored post and just bought a night-night package for a child in need! What a great idea….kudos to this week’s selfless sponsor!!

  92. I love how the number one result is “now I want donuts, thanks a lot asshole.” and the “yes” and “no” votes are pretty much tied XD

  93. I always go for the crumb or chocolate even though I really do love the powdered donuts. One time I sneezed and it was a powdered mess…maybe that’s why I avoid. Mmm…donuts

  94. Hi Jenny!
    I just read your book last week and words can’t even describe how happy it made me! I’m convinced you’re like a much better older sister. I was diagnosed with CRPS when I was 16 (think RA, but more localized with the chance of spreading. and, according to science, 10x worse). And then when I was 19, after a particular bad summer, I realized I had depression (which had probably been lingering since middle school, since I felt the exact same way then).

    I’ve been on medication for both my pain and my depression, and it makes my life so much better and functional (I can leave the house more often!). But reading that you went through the same exact thing made me feel so much more less alone, because some people close to me refuse to believe I have chronic pain (I never told them about the depression) and think taking medication at my age (I’m nearly 21 and have been medicated since 18) is disgusting. And then some friends just kind of nod their heads about both but don’t really get it.

    Plus, you’re just as hilarious and sarcastic as I am and I basically read through over a year of your posts after reading your books. I’m so glad you blog, because a lot of bloggers I’ve read over the years reduced how many times they post a year or don’t blog at all.

    So thanks for being amazing.

  95. To be honest, I can’t think of a powdered donut without thinking of Flowers in the Attic and arsenic poisoning. 😉

  96. What a hilarious post (and blog). Sounds like the fights I get into with my husband. He’s stupid btw. Why doesn’t he want to keep the powdered sugar ones for himself?

  97. As Daemon said in #85 above, go to New Orleans and eat beignets! They are about a MILLION times better than those nasty little dry powdered donuts you see everywhere else. Okay, so their primary purpose is to be a delivery system for powdered sugar, but oh my goodness, do they ever deliver on the tasty goodness!

  98. Speaking of cold…
    I learned this while acting in local theatre…. When you have a heavy buildup of hairspray (or mousse or anything else you used to freeze your hair in place) lather once with your regular shampoo, rinse, then make a paste in your hand of water and baking soda (yeah the same box of stuff people use to keep the fridge smelling fresh) and rub that through your hair. When you rinse that out it makes a strange really cold sensation. Then shampoo again and rinse. The process breaks down all the stiff stuff in your hair and leaves it silky feeling too. Keep that in mind the next time you and the family use spray color or heavy hairspray to do that strange hairstyle for Halloween!

  99. Um, I agree with you both. Powdered sugar makes my mouth feel cold. And I LIKE powdered sugar coated donuts.

    Either way, DONUTS!

  100. But honestly, the reason I’m not crazy about powdered sugar coated donuts is because they are “cake” donuts. They’re positively nasty with that plastic-flavored chocolate “icing”.

    I very much prefer “raised” donuts (the light, soft kind). In any configuration whatsoever.

  101. Your hair looks nice, Jenny. (This may be less meaningful because I can’t see you right now.)

  102. Depends on the powedered sugar for me. I think sometimes it’s somehow treated (so that it won’t melt) and to much of it makes my mouth feel weird, too.
    I love your taking the fight out to the community! Last week I thought about that (having an argument about TV-programme), but I was too caught up in NOT throwing the TV onto the head of my dear husband, for wanting me to watch some stupid movie that he could have watched on the other TV, while I wanted to watch my series…
    Maybe you could meet with a compromise: Victor can buy his own powdered evil wizard donuts but only if he gets you the good and lovely fairy made ones?
    All the best and a happily ever after

  103. “Instructions unclear; ballsack sloughing off” made me laugh so hard I drooled on myself.

  104. Feeling compelled to comment on the comments (curse you, OCD!) — Mabel is not wearing a beret (althought the song – almost – fits beautifully), it’s a pillbox. And to Kelly (#24), who has an 11 year old argument over “if a bear and a killer whale got into a fight, who would win?” The killer whale, obviously. The bear would drown. (I did catch a nature show recently in which a killer whale ate a great white shark — the whale won because it flipped the shark on its back, and the shark just surrendered. Note to self — if attached by a great white, flip that sucker over & you’re done.)

    Now that all is right with the world, maybe the OCD demons will let me read the rest of the comments in peace.

  105. I’ve also heard that lice hate sugar. It’s a fact because it was stated in Super Troopers. It’s probably because it makes them cold. 😉

  106. I think you only get the cool sensation from the “last product in the vending machine” Hostess donettes which probably have unknown ingredients added to the sugar to get it to stick through the packaging/transporting processes. I tried plain powdered sugar – nothing. I don’t know what reddit is, but this explanation sounds like bs. The killer whale would win because look at the size of its mouth. It could swallow a bear whole. It would take a bear a year to eat a killer whale.

  107. I’d look much more like Nicole Kidman if only pizza made my mouth cold.

    (No, I wouldn’t. I’m lying about this as much as I lied about never having a stupid ass powdered donut.)

    And mac and cheese. And moon pies. And yeah, twinkies.

  108. To answer your question, no. What the powdered sugar does is attempt to kill me for eating a donut by flying up my nose and down my windpipe and making me cough and sputter and run the risk of aspirating donut crumbs and dying with powder all over my face which will lead the authorities to believe I really did order eight pounds of uncut cocaine from your shop, and that would be embarrassing for all concerned. Except me, I’d be dead. But none of that matters after reading the reddit posts; now I want a candy that’s made with capsaicin and mint. Or ice cream. That’s totally doable. Jalepeño peppermint ice cream…

  109. I’ve never noticed a dangling “string” piece on one of the marshmallow bales of hay before. Did anyone think it resembled a gigantic OB tampon in that gif? Just me then? Alrighty.

  110. I was going to comment with my chemist husband’s hypothesis on why the powdered sugar makes your tongue feel cool (something to do with how fast it dissolves), but he won’t let me until it has been properly researched.

    I do agree that powdered sugar does leave a cool feeling in the mouth, I just don’t know why.

  111. A bit of a quibble. You didn’t have a disagreement with Victor about the fact that you hate powdered sugar donuts and he likes them, unless he was arguing either that he hates them too, or that you like them too. You might have had a disagreement if you argued that powdered sugar donuts suck, and he rebutted that, no, in point of fact they rock.

    Remember:
    1. When in doubt, Victor is right.
    2. There is always some doubt.

  112. I don’t even know how I got so lucky as to have Climb Out of the Darkness be one of the charity type events/opportunities you would list at the bottom of your post, but I’ll take it!! THANK YOU. Glad tidings to all, and especially to whichever lovely company sponsored your post and made it your favorite.

  113. That reddit explanation is BS. The powdered sugar on those doughnuts is coated with fat (either cocoa butter or more likely hydrogenated palm oil) to prevent it from melting/getting soggy when it comes into contact with moisture. (This is called non-melting powdered sugar and can also be purchased from King Arthur Flour & other places if you have the desire to buy some yourself.) It is the melting of the microscopic fat particles that gives the cooling sensation, just like how some fake chocolates that use mocklate have a smooth, almost cool mouthfeel as they melt.

  114. I don’t know if powdered sugar donuts make my mouth cold, because I always inhale as it approaches my mouth and end up choking and coughing. I avoid powdered sugar donuts. Sure, you could say, “why not just remember not to inhale?” and I could say “why not remember not to breathe?” and go sit in the corner with my buttermilk donut with glaze.

  115. I feel like I was having this conversation recently about some other food. Anyone come across this cool feeling for other foods?

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