Just how lazy are we?

in Random Crap

Someone just sent me a link to this.

Apparently someone invented edible cupcake wrappers.  Which begs the question...just how lazy are we?  Who invented this?  I assume it was someone who was like, “I just wanted some cake but now I have to take off paper?  FUCK IT. I’LL JUST EAT THE PAPER.  Ugh, this tastes terrible.  THERE’S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY!”

And there actually is a better way.  It’s called “regular cake” and it doesn’t come in paper sacks.  You just cut it and eat it.  But you do have to put the knife up afterward and now I already see an issue.  Don’t eat the knife.  Put down the knife.  Just…you know what?  Never mind.  Forget I said anything.

UPDATED:  HANG ON. I HAVE AN IDEA.  Cut the cake with dental floss, and then afterward you can use the floss.  To floss with.  Except people who are too lazy to not eat paper are probably not flossing regularly.  Wait a minute.  I need to do a rethink.

UPDATED X 2:  GOT IT.  A CAKE KNIFE MADE OUT OF CAKE!  And you can eat it when you’re done.  Except, I’m not sure if you can cut cake with cake.  You know what?  Forget it.  Scoop the cake out with your paws and eat it that way.  It’s super sexy.  Or at least, sexier than eating paper.  Just saying.

 

178 thoughts on “Just how lazy are we?”

Read comments below or add one.

  1. Or a knife made out of that hardened frosting! That way it’s edible and stuff 💁🏻✨

  2. If I had a kajillion dollars, I’d use it to solely fund your ideas. We’d all be rich. Very silly, full of cake knives, and very very rich!

  3. Just eat the whole cake. Why bother with a little sampler like a cupcake anyway? Then you don’t need knives, forks, or anything else. Maybe a napkin at the end…

  4. Cake knife made of sugar ? knife could be used to stir coffee afterwards and would gradually melt.
    Or, you know, cupcakes made in a non-stick pan so no paper case needed.

  5. A knife made from that awesome waffle cone material would work!!! You’re welcome. 😀 We should start a business where we solve cake problems. Yay, cake!

  7. Wait a minute~! If they’re made of edible paper – that shit is delicious! Uh I’d TOTALLY buy those… and uh, MAAAYBE make cupcakes.

  12. Why am I not rich off all these ideas?
    Related: *Note to self: launch full line of GLUTEN FREE cupcake wrappers.

  14. Great. Haven’t had lunch yet and now all I want is cake. Sans wrapper/paper.

  16. A friend told me of a wine that has chocolate flavoring to it. So why bother picking up that piece of chocolate next to your glass of red wine? Just drink them together!

    Told her I’d pass. Lifting the piece of chocolate to my mouth, is the only exercise I get.

  21. Obviously intended for late-night (drunk/stoned) snacking when one cannot be expected to work but so hard to snack.

  22. We need a compact little robot cake baker that bakes a cake, frosts it, slices it, and serves it to us. Makes no sense, but neither does the edible paper. I just checked out the link and I cannot imagine that eating it wouldn’t spoil the deliciousness of the cupcake.

  23. I’ve been eating cake and other sweet treats off edible paper for years – it’s weirdly satisfying – I did mainly do it for kids parties to ease with blaming up afterwards ! Yes I’m lazy, but not enough to stop
    Reading your blog, I love it !!

  24. At the grocery store yesterday, I saw that Honey Maid graham crackers now come in squares. “Perfect for s’mores!” You know, for people who apparently can’t grasp the concept of breaking the rectangles in half to make squares. I imagine those are the same people that can’t figure out how to peel a cupcake.

  28. How lazy are we? One of my students told me that she no longer eats solid food, only soup, because chewing is too much work.

  29. I get real tired of licking my hands clean. I say I am trying to save the tress by not using paper towels , but it’s pretty much that I don’t want to have to go buy more paper towels. They cost money, which you have to work to earn, plus I just don’t want to have to walk over to where the towels are. And I don’t really want to have to walk over to the sink either for washing hands and dishes and stuff. Guess I will just keep licking my fingers. Plus that way I am not wasting any cake/brownie/tasty thing. I don’t use plates either, because the OCD in me really resents missing out on the bits of food that stick to the plate. When nobody’s watching I lick the plate too. But then you have to go wash the plate…..

  30. Make the knife out of icing sugar… Hardened like flowers on a kids cake… Then you can eat the knife!!!

  32. Hahahahahaha! Half way thru I thought just use your hands/paws Jenny it’s so much faster!

  35. You have to cut the cake?!?!?! We just set it in the middle of the table and everyone gets their own fork.

  36. In the same vein, I’ve always wondered why the expansion of bread place settings hasn’t expanded beyond bread bowls. Bread plates? Bread silverware? Bread cups? Where are these innovations?!?!

  38. But do I have to stand? WHY IS LIFE SO HARD??
    I’m just going to lie here while you pour something in my mouth.. Cake, knife, floss whatever, man.

  39. Damn it! I have been craving cake and buttercream frosting for a week now. This just made it worse. It doesn’t help that it is shark week for me. I also need milk, might have to use milk as the excuse and pick up cake while at the store.

  40. is anyone else reading this & thinking about Michael Keaton & Henry Winkler in the movie NIGHT SHIFT???!!! “What if you mix the mayonnaise in the can, WITH the tunafish? Or… hold it! Chuck! I got it! Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED ’em mayonnaise! Oh this is great”.
    [speaking into his tape recorder] “Call Starkist”!
    lmao

  41. Just eat the cake with your hands!! No paper!! That’s better for the environment, people! Save the trees! Don’t paper your baked goods!!

  43. This has to have been invented by the same person who invented the motorize toothbrush for people too lazy to move their arm in an up and down motion.

  44. Damn, now I want cake but don’t have the energy to make one….wait, I can make one of those little ones in a coffee mug in the microwave….yeah, I win😂

  45. I actually like the idea of edible papers. I’ve eaten paper before- like when there’s that stuck on piece of wrapper on your bubble gum. It’s not so bad. If the paper part was edible the it wouldn’t feel so wrong. There is actually an edible wrapper on some Asian candy- believe it’s made out of rice paper. That’s all I’ve got.

  46. Cupcakes were always a stupid idea; think about it — do we have cup-pie? No! Probably a plot to sell paper — and those special tins.
    I agree with the regular cake people. Make a big one for everybody. Cut pieces with a fork, like when you’re pretending not to eat too much so you keep taking just a thin forkful, but you have to keep evening the cut. Then the cake is gone and you’re all like “do we have raccoons?”

  48. In an emergency, I’ve cut fudge with dental floss, it works very well!
    It was a chocolate emergency…

  49. So if you say you had a slice of cake, no one knows how BIG you cut that slice but if you say you had a few cupcakes, they will judge. Just saying. I’ll stick to making and eating cakes! So glad your creative juices are flowing again!

  50. We’ve dodged the semi on this one — 404 on the seller’s website. Whew!
    If only ridding the world of the dreaded cupcake-cake (ptooie) were as easy…

  52. I feel like these were designed by some killjoy that gets squicked out by watching other people lick their fingers and figured this would put a stop to it, because apparently nobody should be allowed to have any fun, ever.

    Me? I say if your fingers don’t end up covered in delicious frosting, you’re doing cupcakes wrong.

  54. One time I accidentally took a bite of the paper in between cheese slices. I don’t recommend it. I would totally eat cupcake wrappers made out of that hard shell chocolate syrup though.

  55. Edible cupcake wrappers? Genius!! Solves the problem of scraping off every last bit of the cupcake from the inedible wrapper 🙂

  56. An edible melon scooper. That way you’d only eat a few “cake balls” before the whole cake lost its structural integrity (“Red alert!”) and collapsed into itself. Then eat the resulting cake ruins and melon baller with your hands.

  57. This seems like the thing someone who would eat pudding out of a mayo jar or drink blue kool aid out of a windex bottle would do.

  60. I have a recipe for cake that you make in mugs in the microwave. Two versions, in case I’m so lazy I decide to use soda and packaged cake mix instead of actual ingredients. No paper required.

  61. Melissa Charles used the word ‘eschew’. She wins the internet today.

  62. It’s not lazy! They are thinking of the planet. Think of all the paper saved! We might all have diabetes from sugar wrappers but not as many trees will die.

    PLUS: if the wrapper taste like cake icing, but not as messy, I’d totally eat it.

  63. Also, not an original idea. If you remember the ’82 movie ‘Night Shift’ with Henry Winkler and Michael Keaton.

    Bill: OK, here’s an example. Watch out, stand back.
    [speaks into tape recorder]
    Bill: This is Bill. Idea to eliminate garbage: edible paper. You see, you eat it, it’s gone. Eat it, it’s out of there!

  65. Forget lazy, the idea of edible cases makes my OCD nerves jangle. The wrappers are the only thing that makes it feel remotely safe to eat other people’s baked goods. I would need a non-edible case protecting the edible one, so I don’t have to think about hygiene etc. This would be cake Armageddon for me if I had a sweet tooth.

  66. Marty is right – these don’t exist. I got a 404 and even searched the website and can’t find them. Crisis averted. Let them eat cake!

  67. A katana made of unicorn tears. Because everyone knows that unicorns are real. That’s just science. And because of reasons.

  68. Just when things are going nuts and my stomach gets all clenchy ..

    You post and I laugh. Thank you for your goodness.

  69. I’m not sure about eating the wrapper. Isn’t the wrapper there to keep the dirt off the cake. I want the wrapper to protect my cake to make it safe to eat.

  72. you are absurd. i love you. ( not in a weird way. like, ‘i appreciate you in a way that fills my heart with joy’ kind of love. )

  73. Did it ever occur to you that if you’re eating a cupcake on the go, you may not have a way to dispose of the wrapper, so you just eat it!

    No, I’m just messing with you.

  75. When I was a kid I had a classmate whose mother had been born in Japan. She would come in each year and give a presentation on life in Japan, handing out chopsticks and teaching us to count in Japanese. She also gave out candies that had edible wrappers…inside of inedible wrappers. I never could figure out why the edible one was necessary.

  76. A cake knife made out of the stuff Fun Dip sticks to. Solves all the problems!

  78. They had a phone-in on the radio the other day, getting people to admit to the laziest things they had ever done. The female presenter on the show admitted to having a coffee delivered to her house, rather than go into the kitchen and make on…

  82. Pingback: Just how lazy are we? | H. A. Busse

  83. Just plant your entire face into the cake. When you’re done, plant it into a vat of party punch to rinse it off. And refresh your palate.

  85. In a cupcake emergency, you can just squeeze it out of the paper–no need for peeling. My favourite is, or course, the taco bowl. Eat the low cal salad, then eat the compressed Doritos it comes in.

  86. The photos on their ad look straight out of Alice in Wonderland, when they dipped their plates in tea and took bites out of them. SUPER SURREAL.

  87. A sugar glass knife, problem solved. drops mic
    (Then looks around and puts mic back in stand, apologizes, runs away)

  88. Nope. Leave the paper. Just make it taste better. How else are we supposed to get fiber in our diets if you keep removing the paper from the cupcakes!?! Seriously, Jenny, it’s like you aren’t even thinking about our colons at all.

  90. Making cupcakes are no easy feat, so I’d say the baker cannot be categorized as lazy. But the eaters? Yeah, probably.

    This reminds me of the expression: easy as pie. Have you ever tried making a pie? It’s not easy. Eating it, yeah.

  91. I like the idea of edible wrappers. It makes a mess when I try to open a cupcake and I’m usually eating one from the cupcake truck at the farmers market at work. Crumbs all over my desk! I will tell the cupcake people about these.

  92. I feel like something similar can be achieved with phyllo dough, though. Hm. Time to experiment!

  93. Just pick up the mixing bowl and tip the batter into your mouth. You can then put the bowl on the floor and let your dog clean it. Easy!
    Meow meow meow

  94. I just laughed so hard I snorted. AND then forwarded to my friend cause she needs to know this shit.

  96. I’ve heard of edible underpanties for years. Same concept.

    Also, my husband says his mother used to put the milk for his lunchpail In an empty Milk of Magnesia bottle. Freaked out all the kids – probably the teachers, too.

  97. Cupcakes in cake ice cream cones.It’s a thing. I’ve made them.

  98. I thought this was going to be one of those “I”m so lazy, I… ” fill in the blank posts. You should do that. We’ll help.

  100. I so enjoy how people respond to your bizarre musings; totally made my day. Thanks, Jenny!

  101. SAVE THE PLANET WITH EDIBLE WRAPPERS! No waste, and I bet it tastes delicious. Actually, I bet it tastes pretty much like paper cups without the wax, but I give the inventor points for trying.

    Now I want cake. I hope you’re happy.

  102. Rice paper has been a thing in Japan for a very long time. As a child in the 1970’s, my mother would buy us these candies that were wrapped in rice paper. It doesn’t have a strong flavor, and it was fun to eat the rice paper with the candy.

  105. Don’t bother with cake! Just take out a container of frosting and dip pretzel sticks in it. That is disgusting. But probably delicious.

  106. I wish they would just invent paper made out of cake. It would make shredding way more fun. If you had a dog, you’d have to make sure you had vanilla cake paper for your homework though, because if it was chocolate, and your dog ate it, you might end up being a dog murderer. No one wants that rap.

  107. Well what about the damn ice cream that goes … Oh wait. We’re talking about cupcakes. Screw it. I’ll still eat ice cream with my cupcakes!

  108. This issue here is that perhaps one is NOT lazy bc BAKING was involved in the first place. All of that pouring and stirring and frosting (if you even make it that far – and that’s really critical for cupcakes!) and then cleaning up the kitchen. Exhausting. Who has time or energy to peel paper to enjoy the fruits (or cake) of all that labor? This may be brilliant.

    Or… there are bakeries. Or my mom. My mom is really a better source. If she lived in this state. Bakeries will have to do, then.

  109. Ok, so the good thing is there’s less in our landfills. Yay! But, who doesn’t eat a whole cupcake? That’s just sick, and I’d like to point out the horribleness of our weight obsessed society that there may be people out there saying, “Oh heaven’s no! I couldn’t possibly eat a WHOLE cupcake! I’ll just have a small slice, thank you.” FUCK THAT! Give me the whole tray! (I may be pmsing at the moment and having a real issue staving off the need for cake because I live in a society that tells me I’m fat and don’t really need that cake except I REALLY REALLY DO NEED THAT CAKE DAMMIT!). But then, I use silicon cupcake trays for the very reason that then I don’t need cupcake papers because- 1) they fill up the landfills, 2) I want my cake now and don’t want to fight the plastic wrapper, and 3) we’re fucking broke and it’s hard enough to afford the makings for cake without having to buy paper we’re just going to throw away anyway.

    Rant over, did you know you can cut cake with water? https://youtu.be/vvusk_S0THA You’re welcome.

  111. In related news….proper way to eat cupcake?
    Peel of (un?)edible paper and start gnawing? OR do you rip into top and bottom, invert bottom to make a cake (mmmmmmmmm…CAKE!) And frosting sammich?

  112. In related news….proper way to eat cupcake?
    Peel of (un?)edible paper and start gnawing? OR do you rip into top and bottom, invert bottom to make a cake (mmmmmmmmm…CAKE!) And frosting sammich?

  113. I’ve used the edible cupcake papers and they’re good. 🙂 It’s meant to save trash, but it’s a bonus that they’re tasty. Like cake in a cookie bowl!

  114. I love our ideas. Totally makes sense to me. I even once thought of putting out a book with some of my more “entertaining” ideas in it, but damnit Jenny, you beat me to it !! I had to create a WordPress account to post this and in trying to have the handle McGinny Loves Cats, it came out mcginnylove scats. I do, but that’s private. hahaha

  115. Fuck the cupcake wrappers, I will never eat again after watching that stomach pump video. #cannotbelievethatisathing #peoplemusthavedied

  116. I’m too lazy to make cupcakes BECAUSE they each need the individual wrapper thingy AND individual icing.(I have similar issues with cut-out cookies) I’m all for the one big hunk of cake with a tub of icing dumped in the middle,

  117. You forget that cupcakes are not the same as regular cake. They are complete, balanced, infinitely more satisfying than trying to decide how to slice a damn cake – straight lines or wedges or whatever – and the ONLY downside of a cupcake is having to figure out what to do with the paper afterwards. So edible cups? Bring it on!

  118. Remember those Lik-M-Aid candies when we were kids? The pouch full of flavored sugar that came with the candy stick you’d lick and then stick in the sugar to so you could then lick the sugar off the sugar stick? (How do we still have teeth?) I’m thinking take that Lik-M-Aid stick and make it knife shaped.

    Problem solved.

  119. Wow, I am totally reliving my childhood on this one. Is anyone else seeing Jenny reviving the “Fun-dip”? It’s a candy stick AND an awesome cake knife. I am going to the candy store tomorow. And the baking aisle…….

  120. My child would love that, she tries to eat the paper every time !! She’s a strange child and that’s good thing !! (Not a Oprah kind of a “good thing”)

  122. Better yet, save the money on the edible wrappers and eat just the frosting! I’m like a child. It’s my favorite part and I could care less a kid the cake lol.

  126. Bake cake in a mini bundt pan. Then you have a little cake but no paper

  128. This whole discussion reminds me of the “if you’re painting a portrait of yourself painting, who is the self looking at the self painting…and if you can imagine that self, what is the self that imagines it?” kinds of existential conundrums.

  130. Did you know they’re working on making edible spoons? I think it’s brilliant.

  131. Laziness aside, I think edible wrappers sound like a great idea except for one thing. The wrapper doesn’t just hold the cupcake together, it provides a barrier from contaminants so, for this invention to work, I think the edible wrapper would need to be contained within a paper wrapper. Now you’ve got yourself a winner.

  133. Isn’t all paper essentially edible? Just because something doesn’t taste good doesn’t mean it isn’t edible — anyone that has had to force down a meal cooked by a mother-in-law knows this. Maybe it’s a little chewy, but I’m willing to bet a cupcake paper that has been snuggled up to the actual delicious cake tastes better than a rice cake and people eat those on purpose!

  136. I had similar thoughts when they came out with those pre-made, frozen peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. If you’re too lazy to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich from scratch, just give up now.

  141. I for one am lazy enough to use edible cupcake wrappers. Because I kind of hate cupcakes, but mostly just because I hate having to deal with the wrapper at the end. I feel like my whole world has shifted.

  142. When my sister and I were in our small liberal arts college, together, she started something called the Ugly Cake Ministry. When someone was going through a rough time, she would bake this person a cake. An ugly cake. That they could do with what they pleased. Most people had fantasies of destroying this cake in a myriad of ways. But my favorite, and the most popular choice, was “let’s just eat this cake with our hands.”

  143. When I was young, my sister and a friend and I made banana nut bread and set it out on the stove to cool while we finished a game we were playing. Baby brother left the bedroom at some point and came back with chipmunk cheeks (and grubby little paws) FULL of banana nut bread! So, of course, we all ate that thing in exactly that manner. Who needs a knife or a paper wrapper or even a plate?

    Let them eat cake! With their grubby little paws! Just try not to leave crumbs on the floor – you’ll attract ants… or Dorothy Barker.

  144. I’ve always eaten my cupcake wrappers. They are moist and delicious, much better than paper towels, but then I have pic a.

  145. If you cut the cake with those stringy things in celery then you could floss and eat the floss. Just a thought and I just discovered the best book reviews for kids books. Check out the review of the interior decorators from the great green room in Goodnight Moon. I think you and this blogger should meet and invite me so I can listen to you both talk about things. Hilarious! http://www.theuglyvolvo.com/issues-goodnight-moon-bedroom/

  146. Hi Jenny Lawson,

    So this isn’t a comment specific to your post (although I love it), but my sister just sent me a link about a low income school in rural California that has no books in its library. They’re holding a book drive to try to build a library so that kids will start to get interested in reading. I thought it might be the kind of thing you’d support, so I’m sending you the link in case you want to send them one of your books.

    https://throwingchanclas.com/2016/06/07/just-one-book/

    Taylor

  147. Get a set of chocolate knives so you’ll have enough for a few cakes.

  148. OK, but the real question I see is, what does the cupcake wrapper TASTE like? The word “edible” doesn’t mean a whole lot, really. I mean, technically, fortune cookies are edible but I think they taste like cardboard.

  149. you could make the knife out of hard candy that way its tasty and sharp!

  153. I know this is a joking post, Jenny, but I do want to point out many things made for “lazy” people are a great way for disabled people to gain more independence. Eg not having to have someone remove a cupcake from the wrapper for you, in this case!

  154. First of all thank u sooooo much for the furiously happy copy.. Hahaha but i have to find a way forst to download it since the code says its only for the US… So my aunt told me to lose the IP add.. How the heck to do that.. No idea yet because lazy struck mehahaha…

    Second of all, i suppppeeerrrr love the how to cut a cake idea lol with another cake lol

  155. Given the fact my sons used to try to eat the cupcake wrapper anyway, I am applauding this invention:). Nothing wrong with a little fiber . . .

  156. Reminds me of “toot sweets.” You know, “The bonbon you blow on. The candies you whistle. The whistles you eat!”
    It’s a little different, but I like the association just the same 😉

    Thanks for the memories! Also… I need a cupcake now 😀

  157. @peady…let’s use the waffle cones to bake the cupcakes in…win-win

  159. Cupcakes are hard even if you don’t use the little paper things. You have to grease like a million little cake pans, then bake them in batches, and then you have to frost all of them… no, cake is MUCH easier. Just dump it into one pan, one bake time, and then slather the frosting on once. Easy.

  160. Saw Martha Stewart put a layer of something hard called almond dacoise in a cake. Seems like that could be useful as an edible knife.

  162. You could make a knife from the same deliciousness as the Fun Dip stick. Speaking of Fun Dip they are now selling them in smaller packages with only one flavor (instead of three) and one stick (rather than two), but half the price. And somehow marketing thought the best name for the cherry flavored powdered candy is “Cherry yum diddly dip.” But I digress…

  165. When I was little I used to eat the cupcake paper because it had cupcake stuck to it. So, samesies!! But really, I like the ripple/zzzz/accordion feeling of taking the cupcake wrapper off. Don’t ruin that for me, ok?

  168. Chocolate knife! As long as the chocolate doesn’t melt before you’ve cut the cake you’re sorted. Would work great with a sponge cake or an ice cream cake.

  172. This is fucking outrageous. Haha! We’d probably buy them but we’re too lazy to put down our wine glasses and bake a batch of cupcakes! We have had chocolate shot glasses though…now those are useful!
    Love your blog, it’s going on our ‘blogs we love page!’

  173. I suspect that you have my nearly-patented condition, Two-percent Disorder. If 2% of people get get a side effect, or if 2% of people get some disease and then 2% get some horrible version, that is ME!, And maybe you! Although you might have your own version, Maybe [insert problem here).Sadly, friends of mine have one of these issues.
    There is hope, though. I watched a lovely video that featured stoned people being shown sloths. It was as glorious as you could imagine. I had an epiphany (or maybe a hallucination, I live in Washington). We ALL need sloths. Maybe if we gave sloths to all politicians, they would just sit down and snuggle with their sloths.

  176. Ooh, I know that Jolly Ranchers melted down and then used as a candy coating for candied apples looks like your apple is wrapped in the cosmos — if they keep that sparkly starry look no matter what form they take after melting and rehardening, a Jolly Rancher knife would be AMAZING! Although, the old style Jolly Ranchers that came in a long flat stick would wear down to a nice bladed edge anyway — now I’m wondering why my tongue doesn’t have Jolly Ranchers scars from all the times it got sliced by sharpened candy.

  177. I guess I’m not lazy enough to eat the cupcake wrappers (even though I truly believe that I am very, very lazy), but I definitely am lazy enough to eat that cake with my “paws”! You must try doing that because when you do, you’ll realise its the ultimate joy in life!
    P.S.: I assure you eating cake with your bare hands is going to make your day!
    P.P.S.: Yes, I’m that convinced about it because I studied in a boarding school. And boarding schools have only two ground rules on cake-making. 1. You make the cake without baking. 2. You eat them with your “paws”!

  178. I am reading your Furiously Happy book right now and am CRACKING up. It’s the best read I’ve read in such a long time. Honest, totally funny and downright good. Love it (I’m at the bear part – you named in Claude. LOVE IT!!)

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