Fox and cat are friends. ALLEGEDLY.

in Random Crap

So Victor emailed me this picture:

screenshot

…And I was like, “Jesus, that fox ate a shitload of cats.  WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SEND THAT TO ME, VICTOR?” and Victor was like, “What?  WHY WOULD YOU AUTOMATICALLY THINK THAT?  It’s the same cat in every picture.  They’re friends.  What is wrong with you?”

But then I was even more mad because I’d been feeling all self-righteous because I’m not the jerk sending his wife multiple pictures of the moments before a family of cats were massacred and now I’m the asshole.  Apparently.

Although technically it’s not on video so you can’t prove that this fox isn’t having an all-you-can-eat cat buffet.  Just saying.

PS.  Fuck.  Apparently there is a video.  So I am the asshole.  But still, maybe the fox is just playing with the cat before eating it.  Because guess who else plays with their food before eating it?  CATS.  Maybe this cat killed a mouse who was the foxes best friend and now the fox is like, “You killed Jo-Jo?  Oh yeah, fucker?  NOW THIS IS HAPPENING.”  I mean, it’s unlikely but it’s also unlikely that a fox is best friends with a cat so at this point all bets are off.  Victor says this doesn’t prove that I’m not an asshole because now I’m just going through scenarios trying to prove that a bunch of cats have been murdered in some sort of foxen revenge vendetta.  That doesn’t make me an asshole, Victor.  It makes me a realist.  I blame all of this on my pessimism when it comes to foxen.  That’s the real asshole here.

PPS. One ox, two oxen.  One fox, two foxen.  Foxen is a real world.  Stop questioning me, spellcheck.

 

152 thoughts on “Fox and cat are friends. ALLEGEDLY.”

Read comments below or add one.

  7. In one of those pictures the cat is chasing the fox. Now I haven’t watched many “cat and mouse”-games, but I’m fairly sure if the cat turns it’s back, the mouse is gone. Proof positive that they are playing.

  8. I believe that in the very next minute after the video stopped that little white kitty bit the head off the fox. Because they are like that.

  9. 1 moose, 2 moosen

    i’m with you on this. and i just used moosen in story about a wildlife encounter i had last weekend so… yes, spellcheck can fuck right off

  11. When I saw the first photo I thought “OMG, Why would someone share a photo like that?” so….

  13. I’m not sure I’d want a friend who frequently lunged at my head with big snappy teeth.

  16. You know, even watching that video I was like, “That fox is totally going to eat that cat.” You see the fox gnawing on the cat’s leg? Foxen. Can’t be trusted. At least not around cats.

  20. I always think of more than one fox, as foxen. It is the only logical word. Spell check is totally an asshole.

  22. I’m with you on the “foxen” thing. It just makes sense. Now “foxes” just sounds and looks wrong and I don’t care what any spellcheck says. (But every single spell check thing ever doesn’t think my NAME is right either so I might be biased.)

  24. Google tells me that foxes are actually super cool and trainable and there’s a research project going that specifically breeds foxes that want to snuggle like dogs. You can buy one, apparently.

    So that’s my new goal. Husband thinks it’s an ordinary Monday, poor man.

    (I suspect Google is run by foxen. They are very clever. Do not trust them. They are excellent frolickers but they will lull you with their cuteness and then probably eat your cats. ~ Jenny)

  25. In that one picture, it totally looks like the cat is chasing the fox. Kind of like “take that, fox.” Or I’ll eat your other mouse. Maybe.

  26. I would like to see a yoke of oxen with some foxen eating loxen in several boxen. Autocorrect fucking hates me BUT I’M IN CHARGE!!!!!

  30. Foxen definitely play with their food. I have watched four kit foxen play with a huge bird wing that ended in a bloody stump, no bird attached.

  31. I’m really sorry but I think your wrong. I think the cats playing with the fox being all nice to lull the fox into a false sense of security before bam that cat kills the fox and as he’s just about to deliver the death blow he say “THIS IS FOR MY MOTHER YOU SON OF A BIT**. Then bam no more fox. I could be wrong but cats are devious mother cluckers.

  33. When I was 12, I watched our farm cat chase off a large vixen because she had kittens at the time. It was amusing and pretty badass to watch. I’m all about making up words as I go, so foxen it is. (Though my iPhone just tried to correct that to “dozen” lol)

  34. I feel like a lot of the conversations between you and Victor are exactly the kinds that my husband and I have. Him mostly looking at me like “wut”?

  35. The plural of fox is “crapload of foxy things.” I work at a zoo. Don’t question me.

    Thanks for providing my daily dose of AWWWW. This day has sucked. Now it sucks a little less.

  36. We used to own an Arctic fox that we rescued from a pet store in Florida in the 70s. We gave her to the Lufkin zoo when we moved back to Texas because they were the only ones in the state who had the facilities to handle Arctic foxes.

    And the adjective form is “vulpine” when describing something foxy. Or “foxy”, apparently.

  38. Spell can go straight to He’ll! 😜 I think they are both living dangerously, it’s only a matter of who gets hungery first!

  40. One foxen, two foxen, red foxen, blue foxen.

    Now you’re writing Dr. Seuss books!

    Or maybe you’re rewriting that old TV show Sanford and Son starring Red Foxen.

  41. I totally get it! It’s like when I get suspicious that my neighbour is a serial killer based solely on the fact that 1) he seems nice, and 2) we sometimes take the same classes in grad school.

  42. Um. Until this moment, I thought the most bizarre thing about my day was being struck by the notion that I may currently have the same color and cut as Steven Tyler.

    And then doing a Google image search to confirm.

    And then realizing we could totally be mistaken for siblings. I am a 47-year-old woman with the same hair as Steven Tyler.

    But foxen and cats are an unbeatable combination. You win.

  43. A young fox is a kit, so two young fox would be kitten … thereby, the cat is the (who we all know is the mother of kittens) and OBVIOUSLY this fox’s mother. It’s a family thing!

  44. One chick, two chickens? The two birds in the video were all like “Oh hell no, I’m totally outta here.”

  45. Foxen is what Auri calls her light in the Kingkiller Chronicles and The Slow Regard of Silent Things.

    I’m all for using that word as the plural of foxes, though. It just makes sense.

  47. Why does Victor automatically assume that they are best friends just because they are caught playing together one time? Maybe the fox is drunk and he doesn’t realize that the cat is NOT of his species…or even the gender he prefers. Maybe the fox is the son of the cat’s boss, so the cat has to humor him at the Christmas party and someone whipped out a camera, capturing their awkward party antics for all of eternity. A picture is worth a thousand words, Victor, but don’t assume “best friends” are two of them!

  49. Damn! Now I want loxen and bagels for lunch.

    I’m fostering a large litter of future foxen eaters. They’ve reached the “kitty-kooties” stage where they’re trying to use me as a human cat tree and eating me out of house and home, so I could totally see them hunting down some big game.

  53. Because the video is in a foreign language I turned the sound down and imagined it narrated by Ze Frank. He could make it any story you want, but in my version those two black & white birds (who are complete idiots, by the way) are debating the question of whether the cat and the fox are friends or plotting to eat each other and–too bad for them!–the furry ones later settle down, very smugly and fastidiously, to an elegant feast of Black-and-White-Bird l’Orange.

  54. A group of foxen is a skulk. Almost as good as a group of cats, which is a glaring. A glaring of cats. Cats glaring while foxen skulk, sounds like a recipe for disaster.

  55. speaking of spell check… “foxen is a real world”? perhaps “foxen is a real word” was what you meant?

    no biggie, just thought it was funny it complained about foxen but not world. Of course world is a word. Not that foxen isn’t. but…

    yeah. ok, back to my hole

  57. OK. What if the fox, or foxen, is just TASTING various parts of the cat to see which is more delicious? OR what if the fox is TENDERIZING the cat the way we humans beat a piece of meat with a mallet? (get out of the gutter. We’re talking KITCHEN activities here!) I also think the 2 birds are just waiting for leftovers and don’t care if it’s cat or foxen leftovers.

  58. Apparently, Google translate has no idea what is going on in that video either : “Lake Van, who has made the fishing port on the coast of Van’s friendship with a fox cat, who are staggering”. There is no fox nor cat but a FOX CAT!

  61. Foxen: a combination of ‘fuckin with’ and boxing, as in to spar jokingly.
    Ex: “I didn’t mean to piss you off, i was just foxen wit chu.”

  62. According to Google Translate, these guys speak Turkish. Here’s the translation, so this should clear things right up:

    Examples fox friendship with Van Cat
    Lake Van, who has made the fishing port on the coast of Van’s friendship with a fox cat, who are staggering

  63. God I just love you! You so make my day! I am hooked on your blog now. Just finished your book and have hubby reading it too. We are an older version of you and Victor. Thank you for making me laugh, and laugh, and laugh!

  64. Shelley Berman has a great bit on plurals, which included one goof, a pair of geef and one sheriff, several sheriffim.

  65. I’ve seen this before. The cat wins. It’s probably the same cat that killed a bear. Oh! It also killed a crocodile/alligator (I always mix them up). This cat just gets around, picking fights. It’s probably related to the cat that trapped an entire family in their bathroom so they had to call 911 to come and save them. So it probably killed the camera/video person moments before it killed the foxen.

  66. All the foxens in my area ate all the chickens I had so these photos are probably just a foxen menu from their Kitten Kafe. There is no trusten the foxen.
    …Dang it. They are pretty animals tho…..

  68. I had a white cat with grey on her forehead like that (the grey sadly went away as she grew up). Oddly, she was also friends with everything. Seriously, everything: Dogs where there best (even when she was 17yo), people where good fun, other cats.. meh, rats where fantastic and mice where good buddies.

    I know the rats because a roommate hid 2 cages of rats in the closet that she later ditched, so naturally i had to see what this friendly cat of mine did with them. She licked them, snuggled them, and let them clime all over her. She never liked when playtime was over and the rats went back in their cages.

    I know the mice because of the depression she entered after i found a dead mouse, left very nicely in the main walk way. This cat kept going back to the spot the mouse had been left in and crying. It lasted weeks before she got over her little buddies death.

  70. I have gleefully been saying foxen since reading your first book and the husband never even batted an eye. I think he may be broken now.

  72. If Brian Regan and Jenny Lawson say “Foxen” is a word then that’s good enough for me. Oh and don’t worry, everybody’s the asshole at one point or another or several others.

  74. And just to make things even more interesting, the narrator to the video seems to say the word “monkey” several times. (Monken?)

  76. It appears from the video that cats and foxen play in the same way, which I think means they kind of deserve each other. But I’m not really a cat person. Or a fox person, apparently.

  77. I’m on board with foxen being a word. It just sounds awesome.

    Re: the person who mentioned that a group of cats is called a glaring. That’s pretty awesome too! Did you know that a group of crows is called a “murder”? We sometimes have groups of crows in our backyard and I always think about that. “There is a murder of crows in our backyard.” Whoa.

    Thanks so much for this, Jenny. The bad stuff is trying to take me over today and my demons won’t leave me alone. I needed this. And foxen.

  78. I’m just going to go ahead and book a trip to Turkey (apparently?) and investigate this for you because SCIENCE.

  82. Thanks for putting a smile on my face after a totally shit day at work. Victor should really know by now that you are going to have your own strange interpretation of any picture you see. And foxen is a real word, at least in the urban dictionary. Fuck you, spellcheck.

  83. There is important distinction when running from animals if its singular or plural. So, I believe the most dangerous animals don’t have a plural form. Like Moose. Herd or one it’s still Moose. Someone yells look out for the Moose! You automatically think single one because of geese and goose. Next thing you know a herd of Moose take you down and antler you to death.

    Thanks confusing words!

  85. I like the picture where the cat is heroically throwing itself in front of the fox to save the birds. Boy, is that cat heroic.

  88. Actually, their interaction looks almost exactly like my 8-pound female cat and 12-16 pound male cat. Especially the open jaws (though the fox’s are more impressive) and chasing, and pinning down. My male cat is a bit of an asshole, though the female is finally learning to give as good as she gets. And she’s always been able to back him off with a hiss if she really got pissed.

  89. The cat is being all down on the ground like my badass cat does when the other, not so badass cat tries to screw with him. Trust me, that cat has the fox totally under his control. There will be no cat death there, if the fox gets to uppity the cat will wack hell outta the fox. Plus fox look WAY bigger than they are with the fur going on, my Maine Coons are 20lbs, they outweigh the foxen in my hood.

    OTH, I trapped a sick fox this spring who had babies so a very cool vet could treat her for mange, injury, infection and release her. That fox is pretty cool. The vet is awesome: https://www.facebook.com/wildlifevetcare/?fref=nf

  90. I trained my spell check to accept Foxen by stubbornly refusing to stop writing it. However, it does think Foxen always starts with a capital. On to moosens now. Dammit you people.

  91. Foxen Vendetta is my evil spy name. Or my stripper name. A lot of room for name overlap in those careers now that I think about it. 😀

  93. That looks like the same place they filmed that Monty Python scene with the killer rabbit.

    I hope this turned out better or else you’re really going to have a good comeback for Victor…

  94. Mrs. Completely- it is easy to tell crocodiles and alligators apart. One will see you later while the other will see you after while.
    And that fox IS a bitey son of a gun.

  95. Did you know there is a wiinery in California that sells Foxen Pinot Noir? It has nothing to do with your post but you never know when that info could cone in handy.

  96. Did you know there is a winery in California that sells Foxen Pinot Noir? It has nothing to do with your post but you never know when that info could come in handy.

  97. Well, what if the video was just a cover-up to hide the fact that the fox in it is a brutal serial killer?

    Lol, your posts always seem to brighten my day.

    And foxen is now my new favorite word.

  98. When you think about it, foxen are relatives of dogs. Dogs want to playfight with cats but not eat them. At least, that’s what it looks like.
    The fox is not that much bigger than the cat, so she must know it would be a wasted to eat him. The fox might also be playing with her food.

  99. Wiping away tears from laughing so hard! I’m pretty sure we’re related. This is so familiar! 🙂

  100. Foxen is totally a word, I’ve been using it for years. PS my Flareon is named FireFoxen. 😉

  101. Well I’ll point it out only because everyone else is reading through it. The “worLd” of foxen sounds much more interesting than the “word,” hands down. I’m envisioning brazen intergalactic revolutionists.

  102. Going by the first photo this seems like a terrible story. But I’m glad it turned out a happy one. Plus foxes are beautiful.

  103. Of course it’s foxen – but you should also point out that a female fox is a vix. It’s obviously only vixen if there are more than one.

  104. You are such a comfort to me. It has been a shitty day and there is absolutely no one I can tell but I can write it down here and no one will judge me for it. I am alone at home for the first time in forever it feels like, though that isn’t true, so I can feel my feelings without another’s presence interfering and what I feel is depressed. I do everything that is recommended for depression; medication, exercise, social engagement, volunteer work, gratitude, meaningful work….I even got a dog. But nothing can change the fact that my husband is sick and upset and scared and there is nothing I can do about it, in part because I too am sick and upset and scared. Adulthood is so exhausting. But you, Jenny, make me laugh, make me feel like it’s okay to be broken and admit to it. You struggle mightily too but your honesty about it and your wonderful sense of the absurd make this blog feel like a safe place. Thank you.

  105. I had the same thought you did, Jenny, after seeing that first photo.

  106. Aww…I think you just need to brush up on your cat body language. Anytime kitty is pushing head up against something like in last pic, he’s having a good time.

  107. Foxen. That third photo is pretty suspicious. It looks like the fox is checking its jaw capacity. “Could I get this cat’s head in my mouth?” Maybe planning on swallowing the cat anaconda style.

  110. In Florida, we have water birds. One octopus, two octopi. One ibis, two ibi.

  111. OMG! My mother used to always tell me “I’m not a pessimist; I’m a realist.” I didn’t understand, but I do now… a Realist sees the glass half full, half empty. And also sees a used glass that needs to be in the dishwasher.

  114. look, the birds are pissed cause they thought they were going to see their nemesis get whats coming but nooooo, its all hugs and kisses

  117. Do not F with cats – they WILL find a way to own you. And apparently he wants a RIDE on that fox…i feel it. He’s gonna ride him rodeo style…(turning the tables).

    YEE HAW!

  121. Of course ‘foxen’ is a word. It’s on the internet now, so that makes it true automatically.

    Also, this is the cutest thing I’ve seen all day. But maybe that’s just because I’ve been watching Guns n Roses concert videos I shot the other night in preparation for a post on my own blog and Axl and Slash are just not as cute as foxen and cats.

  125. Say “foxen” all you want. It’s allowed.

    {[PLEASE PLEASE don’t start saying “damages” to refer to what happened to a broken thing. (If you go play mailbox baseball, what you do to the mailbox is DAMAGE, not DAMAGES.)

    *Sigh. Sorry, had to do that. Not that you WOULD say “damages” except as a legal term. I’ve just been hearing it too often lately and it’s like being stabbed in the brain with sharpened stupid.]}

  126. I just wasted 1.5 hours of my life watching the documentary about the Grizzly Man Tim Treadwell. First of all, he’s fucking nuts. Second of all, how do they make a documentary about him and NOT play the audio of when he got mauled and killed?

  127. I will admit, my heart went in my mouth at the first picture. But then the cat was chasing the fox. And then the fox was chasing the cat. What a cavalcade of emotions! Thank God it had a happy ending.

  130. I’d like to point out that neither fox nor cat seem interested in the two birds. Hmmmm…..

  131. That has got to be the stupidest cat. Or Fox. I feel like we are not getting the whole story here….

    We have a local Fox we call Gary. Gary likes to eat my chickens. Gary also ate the neighbors cat. The cat that lured my dog to her death by car. So I am not sure how to feel about this.

  133. I had a cat and a large dog that grew up together. The dog used to carry the cat around by it’s head and the cat didn’t object. Really freaked out the neighbors.

  135. I LOVE foxes! And they will play with domesticated pets, often. Some of them aren’t very shy at all.

    And the whole eating the cat’s head thing? My dog keeps doing that to my cat. She tolerates it a minute and then swats the crap out of him. He’s slowly learning who’s boss. They’re also both still kind of babies. She’s 12 weeks and he’s a year and a half. She was super offended when we brought him home the other day, but now they play.

  137. in the award-winning novel “Grass” by feminist fantasy author Sheri S. Tepper, “foxen” are an alien species that are hunted by the human settlers on the planet, who ride on animals that resemble that really really scary killer horse thing from that dream you had once. So there you go. It’s been a word for a LONG time. And also an excellent book that I highly recommend 🙂

  139. Ok, soul sister. I’m the girl who ran out of the room crying when her parents watched Wild Kingdom, as my mother called after me: “It’s just nature!”. I’m with you. That fox is up to something:)

  140. Poor Jo-Jo. I don’t know why her story always gets lost in the shuffle.

    Also, about Yo’s post–A parliament of owls!

  143. Fox:I love you fox.
    Cat: I love you cat.
    Magpies: Are you going to eat each other, so we can have the leftovers?
    The fox/cat brothers: NOOOO!!!

    There, Jenny. I fixed it for you

  146. Foxen for days. Also, looking at the pictures, I too though this was a kitty massacre. Just saying, it looks like that fox got a feasty photo-shoot.

    Feasty is also a word. ‘Cause I say so.

  149. Pingback: The Sunday Post #3 // 28 August 2016 – literary leisure

  150. @TheBloggess You may notice that this is not one single video of a fox and a cat, but several videos from different angles spliced together, and some of the videos show some rather aggressive acts by the fox. I am still going with a fox killing at least three cats and an elaborate cover up. Probably orchestrated by Fox News.

  151. I watched the video. They are definitely not friends. The fox kept attacking the cat.

  152. Foxes are almost as funny as cats, they are such idiosyncratic creatures. I am sure the fox and the cat are playing, Look at the cat’s ears. Not laid back a bit, as they would be if confronting a danger. And the body language of the cat is totally relaxed. So, while human prejudices might point to ONE explanation, reality points to another.

    I hope y’all are doing OK in Texas! The thaw is coming, and, perhaps in the coming years y’all can replace the incompetent administration that is responsible for this debacle. Be Safe!

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