This week is hard, y’all.

in Random Crap

Hey.  This week is full of angst and anxiety for a lot of us but I just want to tell you what I want to hear myself: It’s going to be okay.  Whether you are protesting in the street or hiding in bed or trying to be positive or you’re confused or scared or angry…it’s going to be okay.

We’re going to be okay.  It might take work but work is being done.  In small ways and large ways and quiet ways you may never know about.

This week is full of scary shit and much smarter people than me have written more eloquently about it so instead I’m just going to share a few silly things that I think are pertinent.

First, know that it’s okay to not be okay:

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People love you and want to offer comfort.  Sometimes we’re just really, really bad at it.

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But the thought is there, even if it’s scary to reach out.

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Know that even when it’s overwhelming you aren’t alone.

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You are loved.

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And bunnies still exist.

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And cats.

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And cake.

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We’re going to be okay.

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Get in here.

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And if you still feel scared, watch this:

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Keep breathing.

260 thoughts on “This week is hard, y’all.”

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I’m so worried my healthcare will disappear….

    (Me too. Sending you love. ~ Jenny)

  2. Oh, yes. We’re going to be ok. Maybe I’m Pollyanna on steroids, but I have faith in us. In those of us who see a different world, who care for our fellow human beings, who stand for decency and peace and knowing that there’s enough to go around. We will be ok because we will make it so . . .

  9. We will all be ok, we have survived worse..we just need to stick together and stand up and fight for what we believe in….Thanks Jenny..

  12. Excellent advice. I find that letting the animals (three cats, two greyhounds) pile on top of me when they sense anxiety really helps. Mostly because then I can’t move (probably their plan) which really inhibits my ability to spin out and do something crazy, like make mac&cheese donuts.

  14. I (very stupidly) read The Handmaid’s Tale this week, and now I’m even more stressed than I already was, which was a lot. You are so supportive of all of us, even when you’re scared too. I love you for it (among about a million other reasons).

  18. Thank you. You have no idea how much I needed this. Or, maybe you do and that’s why we’re bonding. 🙂 Kitty hugs for everybody!

  19. Tummy breaths. Always work much better than chest breaths for me. And knitting. Right now I’m making my pink hat for the upcoming march in NYC. Which will likely add to my stress and anxiety, but not going is not an option in my brain. And thus onward into the fray.

  23. I’ll be one of those in bed. With a cat and a book. And a box of Pumpkin Spice Cheerios, just so I don’t waste away until it’s safe to come out.

  24. Excellent advice. I’ve noticed the animals wanting to pile on me more lately, and letting them really does help with anxiety. Mostly because then I can’t move (probably their plan) which makes it harder to spin out and do something crazy, like make Mac&cheese donuts.

  27. I needed this. Thank you. Although that whole breath thing at the end – holy shit I have no lung capacity.

  28. I’m scared. I’m watching silly YouTube videos. But Saturday the new bed frame will be assembled and I won’t be afraid the bed will break under me, and the bedroom will be rearranged. So there’s that. And the quilt Mama has been working on for 25 years is DONE and there are friends with a quilting machine to sew it all together! And I am loved, always.

  29. Sometimes it’s like you speak to my soul. Mildly terrifying that a stranger could know what I need from across the country but I try not to think about that so THANK YOU!

  30. Being “okay” is not the same as being good, all right, have health care one can afford, can survive retirement, and still have clean air to breath. But WE THE PEOPLE need to do our job by watching DC and telling them to stop being stupid.

  32. 12 days ago we laid our cat to rest after a battle with cancer we didn’t even know he was fighting. I miss him so much. Like I have a hole inside me. I don’t know how to do this thing without him. Yesterday and today I am sitting with a friend while her husband is out of town. She suffered a traumatic brain injury 9 months ago and is a fall risk. I feel bad because all I want to do is go home and cry. Then part of me doesn’t even care if she’s alone or not because it feels like nothing much matters anymore. Does that make me a bad person? So I take some xanax and beat down the firestorm of sobs trapped inside of me. I hope it works soon.

  33. This may have been one of the most anxious weeks in a VERY long time for me. Thank you for this. My thoughts have been all over the place this week and I know that’s just making it worse.

  34. @candidkaye: “Maybe I’m Pollyanna on steroids, but I have faith in us. In those of us who see a different world, who care for our fellow human beings, who stand for decency and peace and knowing that there’s enough to go around. We will be ok because we will make it so . . .”

    THIS.

    I just keep reminding myself that every new generation gets a little better. Kids in school today by and large already think gays should be allowed to marry, and that racism is just straight up gross. There will be new challenges and new adjustments, but we’re going to make them.

    I also keep telling myself the Obamas and Bidens will still exist tomorrow afternoon. They’ll still be in the world, trying to make it better. And we get to do that with them. And if the Malevolent Orange Cheeto won’t do press or answer honest questions, they still will. Bernie Sanders will. Elizabeth Warren will. Al Franken will. We will. And we’ll make it ok.

  35. How do I get that breathe deep gif as a screen saver or something? Amazingly calming.

  37. I’m terrified about our health care. My husband was laid off almost 2 years ago. He is 61 and has great phone interviews and people are so excited, can’t wait to meet him then-nothing. They send him an email saying thanks but no thanks. He’s taken a job sitting for an elderly friend at night. Six days a week, $10 an hour and 3rd shift. Far cry from what he was making but we’re so blessed. We have a paid for house and our cars are paid for too. But if we lose our ACA insurance, well I can’t even think about that. That will send me spiraling for sure.

  38. And some of us Blogess fans are happy! We love everybody, have actually lost our doctors (true story) and are desperately looking for new ones on insurance. When Obama was elected we were nervous because of his policies, but totally supported him anyway. Some policies were successful, some were not. I’ve always worked in a majority male profession and I rocked it. One of my Hispanic girlfriends is heading the agency. Because she earned it. My girl friends are strong, some are gay, some are straight, and we are full of compassion, empathy and hope. Let’s not be one-sided. Let’s be supportive! Everything will be okay. Peace and love y’all…

  39. Can I just tell you, our 90 year old (ish) paper delivery guy was stuck for 3 hours this morning. We woke to him revving his engine, trying to escape our driveway. No luck. Tow trucks by then were on a 3 hour delay. I have been trying to not complain about the weather, even though we’re on snow day #7. So many have so much else to worry about.

    But I think God heard me say that and thought: “Challenge accepted.”

  41. OMG, that LION… I am in love with that lion! And I choose to believe that he is absolutely not buttering up his man-friend for future nomming. Jeremy is totally a vegetarian, who supplements his ethical diet with healthy protein smoothies.

  44. Corgi videos are always the best to watch. Especially ones of them jumping through snow.

  45. I’m not scared anymore. I’m ready to fight. For all of you who want to march on Saturday but can’t, I’ll be there and I will be thinking of you. I won’t be in DC, but I’ll be out there anyway. Hang in there, we’ll get through this like we always do. Together.

  46. I’m marching in Cleveland on Saturday and will send warm thoughts to you, Jenny, and to all the wonderful people here who may not be able to deal with the crowds and anxiety. We all stand together.

  47. Annnnnd just found out they’re trying to cut the program my company gets funding from. So yeah, may be out of a job and without health insurance.

  49. So stressed I can’t even get out the house, so thank you to those who can and carry on the fight for the rest of us.

  52. I asked my boss to allow us to have comfort beer & cookies at our desks tomorrow. He didn’t understand at first, but then I reminded him what was happening. So now the company is paying for Politically Unaffiliated™ beer and cookies tomorrow for “morale reasons.” I love my job so much.

  53. I’m anxious, and I’m just a boring middle-age cis-gender white chick in the bible belt. My kid, an adolescent non-binary queer person with multiple psych diagnoses, is freaking terrified. We’re both scared that our insurance is going away, and I don’t know what that means, for us and everyone else in our shoes (or similar ones). We just keep trying to breathe and hug each other and snuggle our kitties and stay strong. To borrow a semi-annoying but demonstrably accurate catch phrase: Love trumps hate, so we keep going. ♡♡

  54. I’m going to a sister march to show my solidarity to those marching in Washington. It’s all can think to do right now

  55. Thank you. I’m scared too – scared of losing my health care. Health care expenses were the primary cause of my bankruptcy and nearly losing my home in 2013.

    My depression has been really bad lately – so we’re adjusting my meds. But as Susan from Terry Pratchett’s ‘Hogfather’ once said “Don’t get afraid. Get angry!” so I’m trying that. I’m going to the Women’s March in Chicago on Saturday where I hope I will find some courage.

  56. I really need a big hug today but no one is home and my dog keeps wriggling away. ☹️

  57. Thank you Jenny, it really is a hard week for me since I work from home and am alone a lot. I needed this post today.

  58. This is a scary week for many of us. But instead of dwelling on the bad things that could happen I am making good things happen. I’m taking a trip to Scotland and Ireland this summer and I’m taking women with me who wouldn’t otherwise be able to afford to go. I have a go fund me for it (Take a Betty to Belfast – if anyone is interested) (Jenny delete this part if you feel it’s not appropriate), but I’m taking them no matter what. If the Go Fund Me fails then I will use my savings because I feel it is very important to spread the Joy in the face of all the hate and misinformation that’s being spewed by our future leader.

    I’m scared, but I’m doing it anyway, Damnit. At the very least I’m doing something good and who knows maybe that will grow wings. And if I’m broke at the end of it, well I can still write and I still have employment and I’ve been broke before. I’ll survive. Actually no, I’ll thrive. (Even if it’s just to thwart that big turd we elected to lead this country.)

  60. A big part of me wishes it was over. Like some kind of horrible band-aid — just yank it off, get the worst part over with, and resume the fight.

  62. Thank you Jenny, I needed this so much. The last week has been so crappy for me mentally: like many other women, the memories of my previous sexual assaults have been triggered by this man, and this last week they have been looping around in my head driving me crazy. I have fears for the futures of my children. I am trying to be strong. I am going to our local Women’s March in Albany NY on Saturday with three of my children (my husband and the fourth one will be at a ski race elsewhere!). But it is tough. I am struggling. But I hope I might see some worshippers at the church of Bloggessianism there. We all need more gravy in these times 🙂

  64. I think this may be a blessing (small one) in disguise. I think we and our elected officials have just accepted the status quo, and now, there is so much going on that people have.decided enough is enough. I think because Trump is unpopular and is attacking our government, they have decided to push back, rather than just accept it.

  65. I am so scared I may shatter into a million pieces. I think my kitties have picked up on it, because now I get all three snuggling with me at night. Even the non-snuggling one. Cats just know!

  68. You made me cry. Thank you. And it will be okay someday. And…
    WILL AND GRACE are coming back with nine new episodes!!!
    Did you watch their September 2016 9-minute video about the election? Google “will and grace 2016 election.” On youtube and elsewhere.

    I’m also upset because I wanted to go to the march; we live not far from DC. But because of not-that-bad health issues and because I tripped and hit my head on my desk, causing copious amounts of blood to happen, along with an ER visit, CT scan, glued head wounds and seri-strips, and now a major black eye and bruised everything, am not in position to go. But I did buy a pink p-s-y hat on Etsy. And blood comes out of the carpet with hydrogen peroxide. My husband got it all out and returned the dumb new chair mat that made me trip. (Though if he had purchased the right type of ez-tear bubble wrap to wrap items for donation, I wouldn’t have walked into my office to get scissors.)

  72. I can totally relate to these feelings! but, I just heard a song from an album released this week, that may be encourageing for you. I can’t figure out how to make a link, but the artist is Maria Shockey, the album is “SANITY”, and the song is “okay” . It’s on itunes and spotify, but I am not tech savvy enough to link it here…sorry!

  73. The moon will rise when the sun is sinking – and the sun will rise as the moon is sinking. And the earth will continue. It will all be…..

    I had to say that to myself this morning several times as I struggled against an emotional breakdown – again – I am missing my mom. I’m 51 – and its been 241 days since she passed. 262 since she last spoke to me. We never went 5 days without talking my whole life. 🙁

  74. I have no idea why this has hit me so hard. It is just so wrong and is tearing such a great divide in our country. Thank you for reminding us that it is going to be OK.

  77. You are so kind to think of all of us, especially
    when you have your own stuff. Thank you.

  79. Harder than hard. And, it’s not just this week. It will probably be years before things get better. But we’re all in this together and must fight for what’s right every step of the way. Thank you, Bloggess.

  80. Thanks, Jenny. <3U. Dealing with a whole lot of mixed emotions and this helped a bit.

    My MIL passed away a week ago tonight. She was a single mom and my husband her only child and she’s been ill and in pain for a very long time. She and I never had the easiest relationship, and she turned on my husband after we married. Grieving for what could/should have been, but also feeling relief for her and from her. :'(

  81. Thank you for this. I am terrified, but I’m so grateful for you and people like you.
    And if nothing else, I’m a 10 minute drive from Canada and have EU citizenship (exit strategy: drive to Canada, fly to Europe).

  85. Hmmm. While I so understand the need for someone to say “it’s going to be okay” over and over, I don’t think saying so actually helps. For me. Let me add that. In fact, I was thinking this morning that if one more person says that to me I might have to set off some firecrackers or cherry bombs just to dispel the stress from that statement. I’m not as emphatic as “loneoutdoorsman” but I understand his point of view.

    I think we are already at “it’s so not okay”. Just the fact that he was elected put us at that point. I think I understand why people voted for him but that was wishful thinking. Which we all do in matters large and small. This is one of the large ones that affects ALL of us, not just those who voted for him.

    I want to tell “Rachel Crazymum” that she’s not alone. trump is a sexual predator and any mention of him – whether it’s in an in-depth intelligent article about his policies or even just a photo of him – sets off my PTSD symptoms. I’m working on it with help – if I don’t I won’t make it four years. And as much as I want to for personal reasons, ignoring the news isn’t going to help me do what I can for change. (I do limit my news intake though – there’s only so much you can research before it becomes too negative and stressful.)

    We need to be involved, no matter how scary it is. There are so many things we can do, even if doing so feels like tilting at windmills. We need to remember that those we disagree with are still American citizens, just like us (us being those who didn’t vote for him). We may never ever agree or even want to understand their why and that’s okay, but we are all going to be affected by the upcoming changes. If we can’t work together in some capacity, positive change won’t work. (Unless we split into two separate countries. Which is not a viable or good idea.)

    I’ve been reading books on how the US began. It has been quite helpful to realize that as much as trump becoming president feels like the biggest disaster the US has ever seen, it’s not. Things were quite ugly at the beginning and every couple of years after that (so far I’m up to 1840). Having said that, I have to say that if using nuclear warfare becomes part of the picture then of course, things are indeed much worse. Duh. Still, if that stays out of the picture, we have been this divided before and we came together. More than once.

    Anyway, thanks Jenny, for the space to share my thoughts. I am sending out as many positive thoughts as possible for all of us. Oh, and I did make a donation to Planned Parenthood in Pence’s name. That felt so good it must be a sin 🙂

  86. I think a lot of us can relate in the fear of losing our health care. I had an appointment with my therapist for the first time in 3 weeks this morning, but she never showed up. Our next appointment isn’t for another 2 weeks and part of me wanted to cry, because (perhaps irrationally) I just assume I’ll be tossed to the curb the moment the country changes hands… v.v Hang in there, everyone! <3

  88. I was reading a post this week that reminded everyone that when we are comfortable, we don’t change. Perhaps this will be a time of great change for the good. Unless our kids are attacked by grizzlies in home room.

  89. Thank you so much for this and everything you do. <3

    My boss asked us if we needed to close the office tomorrow so we could stay home and drink/hide/hug our pets and children. I love him.

  90. We’re going to be camping in the desert with a million of our closest RV’ing friends this week.

    That’s way too many, but hey, we can literally bury our heads in the sand on Friday!

  92. Thank you. I’m beyond terrified. I’m down with pneumonia this week, which is only adding to the anxiety and sense of impending doom. Only my furbabies and meds are keeping me from doing the unspeakable. Have been clinging to my Guillermo Del Gato for dear life.

  94. I’m so tired of hearing “let’s give him a chance”. A chance to do what? Deregulate oil and gas industries and banking institutes? Take away healthcare for $20M people? Torture (I mean detain) more prisoners at Gitmo? Stifle economic opportunities for the poorest of the poor? Make education even more unaffordable? Nothing I hear from him reassures me at all. So nope… I hope it all comes crashing down on him so we can bring back some hope for humanity.
    In the meantime, bring on the cake and kittens!
    Thanks for making my day a little less dreary.

  95. The Viking has a tendency to stress and when he stresses he yells and when he yells he shakes his battle axe at me. And when that happens I give him “The Cow Look” which has been developed by watching cows, and turn to stone. The whirlwind and shouting and gesturing continues around me but I am the rock and rocks don’t worry about those things. Rocks know that time goes on and most things don’t last forever and no matter how hard it’s raining right now, the sun eventually shines again. Rocks also listen to music and watch cat videos.

    My thoughts are with you, my friends.

  96. I SOBBED the morning after the election. We had gone to bed instead of staying up. But I let it all go that morning. All the fear and frustration and despair at watching the way people treat those that are different from themselves. My poor conservative/libertarian husband just held me and let me cry. (He did not vote for Trump.)

    I’m holding it together better for the inauguration. But I’m very pessimistic about what’s going to happen, to Healthcare, to women, education, the environment, clean energy funding, etc. I’m usually the eternal optimist but things look very bleak right now and I’m afraid.

  97. Trying to stay positive. But I’m just sad. Please be a nice and gentle person, Mr. President Elect. Thank you for the .gifs!

  98. I’m financially secure. I have great health insurance coverage. I’m cis-nearly everything (the whole atheist thing could tuen out to be a problem for me.)

    AND I WILL FIGHT EVERY DAY FOR EVERYONE WHO FEELS BATTERED BY THE ELECTION. EVERY. DAY.

    Just ask my husband, who said casually at breakfast this morning, “Don’t get arrested.”

    (really I’m fighting for everybody, it’s just that some people don’t realize yet they’ll need the help)

  99. I am going to an event with my hubby that will be filled with supporters of the incoming president. I am hoping the cold I’ve been fighting this week will win and I can stay home, so I can avoid them all. I love my husband and the event itself is not political in any way but I know there will be crowing and I just can’t take it. I have already un-friended some of the more vocal ones but it’s harder to do that in person. So come on cold virus – do your dirty work, so I don’t have to disappoint my lovely husband (he’s like Victor only older) and can just stay home in my fort.

  100. Thanks for the reminders, Jenny, we will survive! And if our lives have been a bit more “complicated” than most, it just means our resources are more varied and creative, right? When it gets dark and scary, we can all hold hands.

  101. I love this post! Thanks. Deep breath.
    My little dog Bodie had surgery yesterday so I am feeling very anxious and stressed but all is okay and I’m trying to be calm.

  102. I am just hoping that my new foster dog who ran away last night will be curled up, asleep on my back patio when I get home.

  103. I lost my beloved Siamese cat last weekend and have spent the last five days giving myself a pat on the back just for making it through the simple stuff – taking a shower, putting on pants, going to work. This week sucks and it’s hard and tomorrow Cheeto Hitler begins his regime and I have wondered at many times in the last few days whether I will ever feel okay again. This post helped. It made me smile and it was comforting. Thank you Jenny.

  109. Thank you! For the virtual hug and being you and understanding. I SO needed all of this at the exact moment I saw it. I’m so happy I called in to work to say I couldn’t take life or be an adult today.
    Hugs back atcha!

  110. I’m traveling to D.C. From Texas tomorrow to March in the women’s on Saturday. Im ashamed of our current situation, and nervous about the march, as I have never done anything like this but as Sue put it in a comment above, “when I’m mad and nervous, shit gets done!” I’m taking essential oils to calm my mind, a nice sign that will speak it, resolve to be part of a movement that will make a stand for my god daughters and the generations of women that fought before me and that hopefully will not have to fight after me and a go-pro to document the strength and power we have together. Thank you so much for this post. We will be ok, and we will gather strength together. Posts like this prove it. Jenny, you’re the best, I adore you.

  111. thank you for this. i needed this today and i’m sure i’ll reread and breathe with this tomorrow.in my head i know ultimately everything will be okay but it’s not the easiest thing to remember in the moment.

  112. While I feel terrible for my American friends, our own gong show up here in Canada is just starting, with a couple of Trump wannabes running for the leadership of a Federal party, and trying all his tricks. Hopefully, we’ve learned a valuable lesson from our US compatriots and won’t give them any attention–or votes.

  113. I have a nice bubble that I retreat to when it all gets to be too much. I imagine you’re inside there with me sometimes, and we’re doing weird art projects and drinking wine and eating cake. <3

  114. Thank you for reminding me that many of us are anxious about the future and it’s okay to be a bit fretful. I may spend tomorrow under the covers or use my fear and anger on a cleaning attack in my basement. Music selection may be: Send in the Clowns by Judy Collins, Five Years by David Bowie, It’s the End of the World As We Know It by R.E.M., Blowin’ in the Wind. Could use some suggestions for some positive tracks.

  115. I am in Canada…..and the anxiety is felt even here up north. And we also feel helpless. We can’t really take the street and protest. We didn’t have anything to say about any of this. I will probably need that breathing thingy often

  117. This helped me today:

    Breathe, said the wind.
    How can I breathe at a time like this,
    when the air is full of the smoke
    of burning tires, burning lives?
    Just breathe, the wind insisted.
    Easy for you to say, if the weight of
    injustice is not wrapped around your throat,
    cutting off all air.
    I need you to breathe.
    I need you to breathe.
    Don’t tell me to be calm
    when there are so many reasons
    to be angry, so much cause for despair!
    I didn’t say to be calm, said the wind,
    I said to breathe.
    We’re going to need a lot of air
    to make this hurricane together.
    ~ Lynn Ungar

  118. you always know what to say. <3

    please accept this magical imaginary interwebs gift of spoons, kittens, and chickens. I like chickens, ok

  121. Thank you for this. I’ve been fighting back tears all week and I don’t know what to do. I’m scared for my friends, I’m scared for my wife and son and myself. I’m scared I will lose my disability and my healthcare. This week is awful, but you helped. Thank you Jenny. Xxoo

  122. A book group I am involved in often reads serious non fiction stuff. But this month it was decided we were reading Let’s Pretend This Never Happened,, because we needed something funny. We needed something that says not only can life be survived but there is fun and hope even within some crazy times.

  123. A friend of mine who contributes to HuffPost was asked what Trump’s administration means for the future. [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-the-trump-presidency-will-change-america_us_587e7274e4b01cdc64c8156f?w5wbeh6clcxvzehfr} She found the positive in it by noting the rise in activism, and how important that is. I think I’m going to cling to that hope, because really, isn’t that all there is? The hope that we will all work together and survive and thrive after Trump?

  124. I just found out that I have heart failure. Totally freaked out. Was in hospital for 9 days. And they had to shock my heart to get back in beating right. And I have been telling myself all the things you said. Thank you

  125. Thank you, Jennie. We all needed that and I really, really want to believe it. So I will.

  127. Thank you! I needed this. I (and my husband, just fyi) am trying to protect myself. I am NOT watching news, I am NOT reading the newspaper (except comics, Ann Landers and puzzles). I am knitting, coloring, listening to “happy” music, petting my dog, and more.

    I wish I could go to the Women’s March. See https://www.womensmarch.com/. But, asthma, cold and being fat sort of stopped that. BUT, there’s a fun thing I did do. The pink pussyhat project is in conjunction with the march. See https://www.pussyhatproject.com/. I knit a neon pink hat and will be wearing it in solidarity. It might not mean much to others, but to me, it helps.

    We all need to keep breathing and pray. Chocolate helps too!

  128. Thank you. I live in DC and will be at the march because I need to be but finding the motivation has been hard. I really just want to curl up in a ball in my bedroom with the blackout shades drawn and cry and sleep and avoid the reality of the world. The people who feel galvanized – who are making hats and signs and rallying their hearts out – they’re so admirable! I wish that was me, but I just feel sad and pessimistic. It’s strangely heartening to know I’m not alone. And then the reminders that it will be okay, that I’m not alone and that in my little world there is still a lot of love – well, I needed that. Thank you.

  129. I’ve just been so off this week since I started medication for my depression and anxiety and I really needed this. Thank you Jenny! 🙂

  130. I plan on going to a local solidarity event for the March on Washington, and I really hope seeing people’s signs and hearing people speak will make me feel less hopeless.

  132. This week will be okay. It may not be great but it will be okay. Let’s hope next week is the best, or at least better.

  133. Anxious week for a lot of people, across the political spectrum I’m sure. D.C. locals get the extra layer of anxiety of having the area roads shut down and heightened security alert for the long weekend. I’m contemplating either a netflix binge hiding in my apartment or a long drive into the countryside. Cows are nice to look at, I hear.

  135. I’m not really “political” tho I am a registered democrat, and wanted Bernie. I don’t get into the debates & all that. I just want a good person to run things right. I’m also not “religious”, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have some kind of faith, either. So, pray for me in whatever way works. I’m going with my republican husband to a pro-Trump party tonight, to celebrate.. I don’t even know what. I have a drinking game planned in my head. Anytime I hear anything hateful towards democrats, gays, or people in general.. I’m getting a drink. I don’t drink.. so this could be fun.

  136. You, your post and your followers are just what I needed today. From the bottom of my terrified, anxious heart, thank you.

  138. Thank you, Jenny, once again. Do you have a link to the breathing gif? It helped with a panic attack today.

  139. Jenny, dear Jenny, your kindness, your sharing Encouragements, and soothing reassurances … Wow. (Sigh.). Thank You for being you, for being so real, and so deeply resourceful and, empathetic. On so many levels, depths, and breadths.
    We Are going to be OK, and better. We’re not alone! We’ve got all of us! 😏

    from married to a Czech, in Downers Grove, IL.

  140. As always, thank you Jenny!! And if anyone needs an UPLIFTING movie about fighting through adversity and how just a few people (or even one) can make a difference – I recommend watching Hidden Figures (in theaters now) or even Stand and Deliver (an oldie but goodie).

    Oh and I loved the gifs – particularly the lion and the keep breathing. I need to figure how to download and share with some people I know. 🙂

  142. the last image really helped. I actually did it along with the picture 3 times. I just got to work after going to the doctors to be diagnosed with endometriosis. My mom was 4 years older then me when she had a full hysterectomy so today was a hard day, I braved it alone, even though i didn’t need to do it alone. Actually laid in bed with my sick partner before braving work after this morning and I just want to say. Thank you. Thank you for being you Jenny. It makes it okay to be me sometimes.

  143. Thanks, Jenny! I’m so thankful for you and your tribe. My previous support system collapsed when several of my close friends and family members voted for Trump. I can’t currently forgive them. So I am leaning on my new friends that I have met through you.

  144. Thinking of all of you in the States. I’m sure things won’t be as bad as you imagine. Don’t forget the whole world is watching in interest so you definitely aren’t all alone- we e got your back 🙂

  145. I truly wish I could have hope in that thought. I become more disheartened and have less confidence in “the powers that be” or will be, with each passing day.

  146. I am so, so, sorry Cassie Steger and Veronica. Sending all my love to you and condolences on your losses <3 (And my kitties Alaska & Isabella send kitty cuddles too!) It is so hard to lose a beloved pet, but I hope your memories will help you heal until another 4 pawed little miracle finds it’s place into your heart! <3
    Herringrevere – Make America Kittens Again is the coolest thing ever!! Thanks so much for sharing it!!
    mydangblog – I’m so with you! I’m Canadian as well, and I am terrified that O’Leary will be our next Trump. With those two in charge there would be no compassion, ethics or morality left in North American government at all. I pray our country makes a compassionate choice.
    Jenny – THANK YOU. Always – just for being your generous, loving, amazing self <3

  149. While I appreciate so much of what you say, Jenny, today just the breathing thing is what I needed. Thanks for sharing and always being thoughtful about helping others through darkness.

  150. My mother passed away last week. It was so hard – no words.
    Now my brothers seem to have elected me Matriarch. I am not prepared for this, and now politics too? The breathing thing helps. I forget sometimes.

  151. It’s been a helluva week here too…our small town was rocked by the death of a police officer who was shot/killed by a guy who shouldn’t have been out of prison ANYWAY but was for..whatever reason.

    Thanks for this.

    And the GIF of the cats…my two hellraisers Tony Underfoot and Bella Skeerdycat are often found just like that, snuggling up together with their arms around each other.

  152. I’m probably losing my place on my husband’s health insurance, and I can’t get covered again because iof preexisting condition. I need the insurance, I have an appointment at least every other week. Sigh.

  153. Thank you for posting this! I needed it today! Much hate-filled flapdoodle today. My armor is busted.

  154. Thank you for this. It’s all so cute. And knowing that I’m not alone is always a good reminder. Hugs to all. We will be okay. At least I’m really hoping so.

  155. <3 Thank you, Jenny. I always seem to need your words, and today I definitely needed the reminder that we’re going to be okay.

    I know your site isn’t political, but I also know that you’re connected to a lot of folks in the Spoon community. If you or anyone else is interested, here’s the information for the Disability March that’s being held online for all of us who can’t leave our homes for whatever reason, but still want to show solidarity: https://disabilitymarch.com/

  156. I needed this! I’m trying not to bawl at work solely because it seems like I’m the only person on earth who can’t get their shit together.

  157. I’m flying to DC tomorrow to march with my daughter. Maybe it will help me deal with my JCC being evacuated and now there’s barriers up at my synagogue. I’m so angry and sad.

  158. Thank you per usual! And I really like the idea of Leslie Knope-ing through this. WWLKD? 🙂

  159. I expect I’ll be spending alot of time on mynoise.net

    There’s something for everyone. Calming the obnoxious assholes in your head, tinnitus, “brain-hacking,” encouraging sleep, you name it.

    The assholes happen to be very loud and very insistent at the moment. Several of the streams on mynoise are quite helpful (I love the Yakutian voices, the primeval forest, and the tibetan bowls). Give ’em a try!

  160. I’m a history/poli sci double major, and I’ll reiterate what others have said: Our country has survived catastrophes before, and we’ll survive this one (I’m going to choose to be encouraged by the fact that Rick Perry has now been briefed on the fact that he is going to be in charge of the nuclear arsenal, and try not to dwell on the fact that Rick Perry is going to be in charge of our nuclear arsenal). The problem is that most of us are too young to remember the last time our country really went off the rails, and we have had the luxury to distance ourselves from politics and pretend that it doesn’t affect us until it really, really does. Our founding fathers were brave mofos who absolutely risked everything– their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor– to bring this idea of a country about. We get a sanitized, glossed over version of history, but our history has been bloody and contentious and full of terrible, terrible mistakes made by people with good intentions and people with vile intentions (we managed to enslave one race and commit genocide against another, all in our first hundred years). Go back and read what Jefferson and Madison and Washington and Adams and Franklin all wrote– the Declaration of Independence certainly has taken on a different tone this week. We are the descendants of people who survived. We can get through this. Stay vigilant. Love your neighbors. Ask for help when you need it and turn around and help the next guy when you can. And never forget that you are perfect, right now, just as you are.

  161. One more note: For everyone worried about your health insurance coverage, yeah, I’m right there with you, but any changes won’t take effect until 2018– the policies for 2017 have already begun. It’s not much of a ray of sunshine, but at least you have time to figure out what to do next if the worst happens.

  162. I’ve been trying really hard to stay positive but the election season opened my eyes to how a lot of people I call ‘friend’ really feel (not just pro T-Money, but it seems many of them are pro hate-whole-groups-of-people).
    I’ve been stuck in this cycle of telling myself ‘it will be ok’ and then having an anxiety attack and feeling like ‘why bother, it’s not going to matter when he tweets something that makes bomb the beejeezus out of us.’
    And I am pretty sure that the next person who tells me ‘we survived Obama and we never said one bad thing about him so you can quit your bitching’ to me is going to be the reason I end up in the asylum…

  164. I am afraid. But if I stop functioning, then that’s a win for the other side. So I will get up, I will keep going, day by day, I will keep breathing, and I will have your back. Thank you, Jenny. That breathing exercise alone is magical, but that lion gif is AWESOME.

  165. Wow– I am sharing that bottom gif with my daughter. She would love that! It’s four years. I figure I lived through middle school (grades 6-9), and that was utter hell, so I can do this. Plus, there’s always a moat of vodka to sip, ok, swill, from. If that doesn’t work, then a Xanax fountain.

  166. I had an idea today for a greeting card for my “I’m sorry about your vagina” fake greeting cards series that probably need to be real. Sadly it involves the upcoming events.

  169. I have to teach tomorrow. I hope I can hold it togetherin front of my students who are terrified. I need to be strong for them.

  170. How is it possible that you make me cry even though I’m totally comforted…..snif….thanks

  171. Thank you for trying, Jenny but I fear that you’re wrong. My despair is endless. I think that sometimes depression doesn’t lie.

  172. Thanks for reminding us. I’m going to cuddle my dogs and pray for us all. But no matter what, you rock, Jenny.

  173. Thanks for this, Jenny! I am from Canada, but I can assure you we are just as fucking confused as you guys as to what the hell is going on. We are rooting for you to keep your healthcare, something we can’t imagine living without and are sending lots of love from north of the border. All the best, guys!

  174. I’m having health anxiety as well as inauguration anxiety. I think I might binge watch some Parks and Rec tomorrow for a good dose of Leslie Knope. Plus meditate and take a long walk.

  175. Thanks for the post, Jenny. I just feel like this is a huge nightmare. Basically, every stress-exacerbated ailment is flaring right now. I feel like I’ve been beaten up with a baseball bat and then set on fire (thanks, fibromyalgia) — and now I won’t have healthcare.

    THE FUCKING BASTARDS!!!!!!

  176. I’m really feeling it today, and I am having a lot of trouble keeping my chin up. My agency is specifically named as one Trump wants to eliminate (despite our mission directly supporting important parts of his platform) and we were busy today. Here I am wondering if I’m going to have a job at all in a few months, and knowing the consequences for many Americans if I don’t, while trying to do a million things to serve the American public. And while getting reports from my coworkers and friends who went into the office today (many of us, me included, worked from home) of being accosted by God-botherers and angry Trump supporters (sorry, not even REMOTELY sorry, but if taunt someone who’s just trying to go to work, you’re a sore winner!). My hands are shaking, my heart is beating too fast, and I’m terrified there will be actual violence tomorrow and Saturday, just down the street from my HOME.

    2009 and 2013 were so much fun. Everyone was so happy, and the few protestors were more of an amusing distraction. I came in for the inauguration in 2001, just to see it, and while there were protests, it wasn’t scary and, actually kind of fun in its own way. I didn’t support W, especially with the way the election went, but there was pomp and circumstance and, yes, a general feeling that it would all be okay. This isn’t a party, even of the pity kind, and it really sucks being so close and having so much on the line.

  178. Thanks for this. Much as I like cake (and chocolate and wine), I’m feeling better by fighting back.

    I wouldn’t normally advocate for joining any group on your page, darlingest Bloggess, but in this case, I think the information is important: look into political action groups, such as Daily Action (Facebook and by text). I get a text every day that suggests what action I can take to RESIST this crap, and I’ve made more calls and written more letters to my senators and congressional representatives in the past two weeks than I have in the past five years…and I am one of those who calls when I’m mad!

    Take action. Fight back. It’s “better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.”

    And that orange a*hole is the biggest darkness in our world right now.

    And btw, yes…I AM a republican…but I also have a brain and I am fighting back from inside the party. None of those idiots represent me, yet I feel like other republicans take my complaints a bit more seriously when I say I’m a registered republican. Maybe I’m wrong…but I have experienced people’s attitudes shift on Facebook and twitter when I say that. Sadly.

    Because shouldn’t we LISTEN to each other to begin with?

  179. And I just realized one of the reasons I’m so on edge! A few days ago, they tested the cell phone emergency broadcast thingy. I got the email saying if you were on or near the National Mall, you’d get an alert. Not sure why, but despite being nowhere near the Mall (I mean, I’m “near” in comparison to many, many people…I can see the very tippy-top of the Washington Monument from my bathroom window…but still a few miles away), I got the test. Scared the daylights out of me until I looked at it and was reminded it was a test. Earlier today, I heard a faint noise that sounded somewhat like the noise my phone makes for those emergency broadcasts. It wasn’t a broadcast, but it freaked me out real good after hearing reports and seeing videos of what was going downtown already. If we were inaugurating literally anyone else on the R/conservative side (except maybe Gary Johnson…guy didn’t know enough about too many things), I would be shrugging and deciding whether I want to day drink at a friend’s place near the Mall where we can people watch or just stay home and sleep all day.

  181. I’ve been too angry for too long, and when I re-tweet anti-Cheeto stuff, my one or two friends who actually voted for him think that I’m Pro-Hillary (and therefore whining over my candidate “losing”). I’m Pro-EVERYTHING ELSE, I’m only Anti-Cheeto! And I hate myself for being Anti-Anything, so I told my husband I was quitting my negative re-tweet campaign. He reminded me that I’m blessed to be HEALTHY (for the most part, and when Depression Lies to me, it’s usually only for a little while) and live in what may be the only “insulated” state (California), in that we that taxpayers already pay for the services we want, which means they’ll still be available to us, even if the Cheeto nukes the planet.

    So I’m going to march on Saturday in solidarity with the rest of y’all, who aren’t insulated from him, and really have something to lose. It’ll be a positive message, for me and those I’ll be marching with. If only I had friends or tribe members to march with. Los Angeles is too big. I’m going anyway, but… I’ll be marching on behalf of all of my online friends who, for whatever reason, can’t make it.

    And when I get back online, it’ll be all puppies, kittens, bunnies, and baby goats. All The Time.

  182. My 67th birthday will be tomorrow. Friends and I will be nature walking, lunching and having wine while Gollum is sworn in, to keep our minds off the bread and circus to come. Then, on Saturday, we march. Seattle in the house! My loving message to you all is “Rise up, Unite, Resist”. It’s ok to have moments of anxiety, we will carry each other. But whatever happens, we will work for a better society.

    Thank you for the gift of your blog, Dear Jenny, you are a blessing.

  184. Thank you…bad RA week…want to.go to the Women’s March in MN…don’t know if I can…so you are helping so much. :). Scared for those of you who need ACA insurance, and other scary things 🙁

  185. I’m so glad for the foresight you show, always, when needed. Although I’m in Canada, we are not immune to the influence your government will have on our country, as well as yours. Anxiety runs rampant here, as well. Thanks for the gifs, and the positive thoughts, and I’m hoping it won’t be as bad as I’m convinced it will be. Jenny Lawson rocks!

  186. I’m having waves of anxiety, fear, deep sadness and hope. I’m not sure what the near future holds, but I’m grateful for my tribe and all the wonderful people marching Saturday in person or in spirit. We need each other. I need y’all. Thanks for being there.

  187. Of course we are going to be fine!! Look what we endured for the last eight years! C’mon, manifest happiness and positivity, y’all!

  189. As much as I believe that the world will survive and most people will get through the next few years okay (unless nukes), I dread waking up to the inevitable news that someone wasn’t okay, and didn’t get through it. People will die. People are already dying. Children. Pregnant women. Elders. People of color. My friends, my cousins, my people, my family.

    It’s not okay. It’s not going to be okay. It’s going to be very, very bad.

    But we have to keep fighting. We have to save as many and as much as we can.

  190. Thank you for this!! I don’t know if it’s going to be okay, in general, but it’s comforting right now, in this moment, even with fear, I am okay, many people are okay and that counts for something!

  191. i’ve had this feeling that the world is ending. like i can’t breathe and there’s something waiting around every corner. today on twitter i read a tweet that explained exactly how i was feeling. the new president is a sexual predator. the new president is an admitted sexual predator. people knew and didn’t care. people knew and voted for him anyway. this is my childhood all over again. people know and don’t care. people know and are complicit. i’m never going to be safe again.

  192. I’m going to make a cake. And a blanket fort. And take my cake and my pug and my kitty in the fort, with my books and something to color. And that’s where you will find me.

  193. THANK YOU. I really needed to read this. (And see the bunnies.)

    Wonderful posts like these – and Prozac – are helping me cope right now. Appreciate your help. I really do.

  194. I know it’s really not Thanksgiving today, but I’m so grateful for you, Jenny! Thank you!

  195. I can’t remember whom coined the image, but yeah..I am totally chasing after Dad’s car and crying, “wait!!! Don’t leave!!! ” But no, I have to stay with the creepy stepdad now.
    -cannady

  196. Thank you, Jenny. I am grateful for your humor. In fact I maybe addicted to it and furiously happy to be so. 😂

  197. thank you for the keep breathing thingy…i wish i could put it on my wrist to push as needed throughout the day
    Cindy

  198. The breathing GIF is helpful. My escape of choice has been wine and Downton Abbey marathons EVERY NIGHT. But soon I must buck up, buckaroo. There ain’t no sanity clause.

  199. I know it will be okay, but I’m still proclaiming this the official “sticking my fingers in my ears and singing la-la-la-la-la” weekend.

  200. Thanks to all of you for your love, support and wise comments. We will get through this together. Already had the cake, now am mesmerized by the breathing thingy. Will hit the March in Portland on Saturday and be thinking of you all.

  201. I have always enjoyed your writing and have never thought that depression and mental illness broke down on partisan lines.

    However, I was clearly naive. Based upon your reaction to the lawful election of our next president, along with the 100s of comments claiming some sort of severe emotional distress because of the election (and before Trump has actually done anything), I can only conclude that left wing politics and menatl illness are closely correlated.

    This conclusion is somewhat sadenning, as I had never felt unwelcome before even though my political views lean towards the right.

  202. Yeah – why you lie on your couch, the rest of us have be in the real world not pillow forts.

    (Kathleen, I know you struggle with a lot of the same issues that I do so I understand your anger. I know I’m very lucky to have my life. I do still work full time, though. Granted, it’s at home and I’m lucky to have a job that I love, but I spend my days working as well. I have two books due, plus marketing, contracts, taking care of my daughter while my husband travels most of the week. Plus blogging and ads and side work. I love my life but I can assure you it’s not soap operas and bon bons. I’m not saying that to defend myself because I know who I am and what I do but it seems like you’re really struggling and I just want you to know that everyone has their own struggles and I wish you the best with yours. ~ Jenny)

  204. I remember my dad telling me as a kid ‘people fear the unknown’ yes, I was afraid Martians would come abduct me. But this to will pass, the hard part is going threw the storm, a four year storm. But wasn’t kill us better run.

  205. THANK you – needing this – having to put myself on a news and Facebook fast to get through today. We gotta hang in there.

  206. To Tom Donahue: I think if it had been anyone besides Trump, you would not have seen the same over-reaction. There’s just something about him…..

  208. I’m not sure if this is the right place to ask, but it seemed as good as any. Is anyone else who struggles with anxiety planning on going to the protests this weekend? I’m going, but more than a little worried about how I’ll react. Just curious if anyone had any advice.

  209. In the last 7 days I found out my husband is a closet alcoholic, he hid his drinking so well I never suspected, he even lied to his therapist, psychiatrist, and neurologist to get an entirely different diagnosis 3 years ago, he was systematically putting my 6-yr old daughter in danger over the same period as he drove drunk while I was working in a foreign country. And while he spends the week at work saving his career and in outpatient care with a team of people to help him with his addiction and the causes of it, I am single parenting taking a week of work to be home alone and come to terms with having to give up my career (which requires travel), caring for my daughter who is scared of her father, and having to be HAPPY for her. And today the president that I worked so hard to help elect 8 years ago is leaving office for someone who believes, along with his cabinet, that the kind of power that my husband took away from me to make my own decisions should be enshrined in laws. And my husband drank the last of the coffee today before he left for the day. It is a dark day.

  210. My health care has got nothing but worse in the last few years. I am paying more and more than ever while supporting illegals in my state of Alabama who are getting free medical service. My best friend’s granddaughter is fighting a life threating disease while the medical bills are piling up past six figures. On the other hand, illegals in this state are able to get their children on Medicare and pay nothing for the same treatment. I am so ready for a change. My anxiety has been the last eight years.

  211. Just so you know, if they take away my healthcare, I am coming to live with you and James Garfield. I don’t eat much so it’ll be fine.

  213. Just 10a.m. here an already I am already getting anxious.
    Just as a side note, correlation does not equal causation. I mean, really???

  214. Read the latest post from Helen Philpot on her Margaret and Helen blog. You’ll feel better knowing that there are people like her fighting for you.

  215. Thanks, Jenny. It’s good to have a place to come and breathe and watch bunnies. My little lop-eared guy always made everything better—you just couldn’t help but smile at his eternal bouncy enthusiasm. I’ve always thought I was more prone to depression than anxiety, but I feel like I’ve been in heart-racing fight-or-flight mode for weeks now, and today it’s off the charts. I finally realized that part of why it’s so terrifying is it feels like being in an abusive marriage with an unpredictable sociopath all over again. Standing and fighting is an honorable choice, no doubt, but I also suspect that those who had the foresight to get out of Germany in the 1930s regretted their flight—and I sure don’t regret mine from my marriage. Only this time it feels like there’s no safe place on earth. Oh, god, this isn’t working. Breathe…breathe…breathe…. I think I need to put that breathing gif on my desktop…

  217. I am wearing a tee shirt that says ” I can’t I reallllyyy just can’t” and not watching the inaugRrrrrr! Thanks for the gifs in my heart I’m marching.

  218. Thank you Jenny,
    I’ve been a reader for a few years and this blog is my safe, laugh out loud zone. I brought flowers to our local Planned Parenthood today during the time that our country exploded. I told them how much they mean to me and that our two daughters will appreciate them being there some day too. We donated to them right after the election and today we donated to Sierra Club because, well, because.
    I think the world of you, you have a following and you make me feel good. thank you Jenny.

    Avery

  221. I’m probably going to overshare here but I can’t really post on my FB page at the moment and I’m kind of about to explode. Aside from the obvious of today being the Inauguration of a man who is pretty much the opposite of what I want for my country, is been a really rough week.

    My family has been passing viruses back and forth since before Christmas. Mine went from the viral to the bacterial stage and so I finally let myself be dragged to the doctor for antibiotics and steroids. I’ve taken this antibiotic before and don’t remember having problems with it, but this time around it’s seriously effing me up emotionally which is frustrating. And Prednisone, while helpful, is also a mood effer-upper. And normally, these would be mostly manageable but…

    Earlier in the week, my partner’s grandmother had a stroke. Her daughter had been trying to call her and didn’t get an answer which was unusual, so she called in the cavalry so to speak, and they found Nancy unconscious with no idea how long she’d been that way.

    At first, it seemed like she might turn around, but…it didn’t happen. She had an unstoppable brain bleed on top of kidney failure. (She was diabetic, had 1 kidney, & that one wasn’t hers.) She had a living will with a DNR, so Tuesday, they moved her to hospice. Unfortunately, there was really no way to get my girl to Alabama from Indiana in time. We’d talked about trying to fly her down Wednesday morning, but had to nix the idea because she’s just finished her antibiotic run and is still having a lot of sinus/ear pressure and no one needs a ruptured ear drum on top of grief. Nancy would have been the first to give my love a chewing out for it. It turned out to be a good call since we got the news that Nancy had passed right around the time my love would have been landing in Birmingham.

    And I’m trying so damn hard to be supportive, but I’m not okay. I’ve had several rough depression months and my anxiety levels are off the charts and I’m already a hot mess without the antibiotic/steroid combo and I feel like I’m failing. A lot. Especially since I’ve basically been having to sleep as much as possible. And it sucks. And I loved Nancy, too, and death is a bitch.

    We really should already be on the road; the funeral is tomorrow at 2pm. We’re not even packed yet and I’m worried we’re going to miss this like we’ve missed so many other things in the last two years because travel fails have pretty much defined us. I really don’t know what to do or where to start.

    And so, of course, all of this is going on and my 14 year old daughter decided to start the day by lying to her other mom. My love gave the kid several chances to fix it and instead, K kind of went out of her way to nuke everything. She’s been having a lot of trouble with honesty, personal responsibility, and respect and it’s been hard as hell because who really wants to admit that their kid is kind of a selfish brat? I sure don’t. It feels like one more thing in constantly failing at. And so, there were three hours of Dealing With K which we really didn’t have time for. And this is why I can’t post on FB. My sister-in-heart is already pretty furious with her niece because many of our travel fails have either indirectly or directly been a result of K screwing up and I’m pretty sure if my sister got wind of what was up today, the reckoning my daughter will face will be much worse than the Come to Jesus conversation Sister already has planned.

    So, I’m dealing with a kid who’s being a shit, a deadline that is quickly approaching, an antibiotic that’s making me sick as crap, a beloved who is broken hearted, a mountain of anxiety (covering all of the above plus “How to Deal With All The Peoples’ Grief”, “How to Deal With Being in the South the Days Following Trump’s Inauguration Without Ending Up In Jail/The Hospital/Randomly Screaming Like Pikachu in an Attempt to Not Lose My Mind”, and all of the “usual” anxiety suspects), and for some damn reason, my neighbors are doing something with some kind of electrical equipment outside the wall of my bedroom and it’s been going on for two hours and apparently well never end and my head hurts.

    I’m so overwhelmed and exhausted and all of this stuff is on top of the day-to-day “life with Ehlers-Danlos” stuff and I want to quit because I feel like I’m not doing anything right.

    So, here I am spilling my life to virtual strangers because it feels like a safe space at the moment. So now, I’m going to make myself go find food to take more medicines & deal with laundry things and get the fuck off of social media because THAT shit isn’t helping. But if anyone has any spare love to share, my family could really use it. Especially my beloved who literally keeps me alive. She’s really hurting and I know that pain and I logically know I can’t “fix it” but damnit, I certainly want to.

  222. Woke up feeling slightly anxious that Obama will no longer be at the helm. I’m just hoping that stepping into the role of president will make Trump a better man.

  223. I wore the dress I usually wear to FUNERALS to work today. Symbolically mourning the end of a presidency marked by intelligence, compassion, and genuine caring for others. And afraid of the coming 4 years, hoping they will not be marked by the misogyny, racism, and contempt for others I saw during the campaign. (Hoping-this too will pass-AND that people will not re-elect the same misogynistic racist contemptuous humanoid 4 years from now.)

  224. I was in my bed, hiding under the covers when my husband texted me and said, ‘It’s done.’ I had somehow imagined that polar bears would meet, make a decision, and then a unicorn would take form out of the mist, tap the orange one with pink hair and tiny hands with a glittering hoof and make him small again. But that didn’t happen. Then, not being able to sleep, I got up and paced for a while. My friends texted me to see if I was protesting today. I’ve been protesting lots of days, sending letters to Congressmen, and wildly signing petitions, but today I just couldn’t. So, I paced for a while longer, then finally sat down to a black screen on my computer. Then, I remembered you and found you and you gave me cat hugs and bunnies.

    And I knew it would ultimately be okay, that even if I couldn’t fight today, even if existential angst threatened to climb into my throat and choke me, my kitten would still bat at the string from my hoodie, my son would still be hungry for what I cooked, my husband would still make snarky comments in the kitchen, and my dog would still need long and wandering walks by the river.

    And I can join the protest again tomorrow.

    Jenny, thank you for the cat hugs and bunnies.

  228. My philosophy of life is that ‘if this is the worst thing that happens today? That’s still a damn good day!’ Life is hard and we always want it to be easier. It isn’t. AND WE GOT THIS!! HUZZAH! Is huzzah even a word?

  229. Aw, ‘get in here’ kitty looks just like our Simba who passed away at fourteen almost ten years ago now. Oh why am I depriving myself of coming here when it always lifts my heart?

  230. You are amazing. I LOVE the donation stuff on your Facebooks.. gave some $ to the Channel Islands kids trip. I love it so much . SO so much.

  231. it is what it is. we’re stuck with it, so we may as well get used to it. Or at least stop watching the news. Im wondering how long i can go without wanting to know what’s going on Out There.

    Possibly forever.

    Longer, as long as I don’t run out of food

  233. I hope someone does for you what you just did for all that read this post. This was lovely. Thank you, Jenny.

  234. Today I feel hopeless and useless and more depressed than ever.
    I am relieved, amazingly, that my daughter is not here to see this: she supposedly jumped from a 21st story roof in Arlington, Virginia in 2013. Victoria Thompson doesn’t have to see this insanity, but my nieces, all artists, her cousins, still have to deal with this. It’s a fucking nightmare to anyone logical. or sensitive, or artistic, or reasonable, or here at all, lets face it. We all know this is insane.

    So stay sane, even if they call you crazy, you know this is more insane than you could ever be. Mental Illness may exist, but if it’s a label on you that doesn’t fit because society is even crazier, reject the Label, and reject the stigma. Figure out what it takes to make you feel sane and design life that way–what are you waiting for? For the rest of us crazies to figure it out? You know what you need, and I sure as fuck do not need a Trump illegitimate Presidency for 4 long years. What could possibly go wrong with that?
    Obviously we have to live with that now, but we don’t have to accept it or internalize it, we can make him a 4 year failure, the one that he is, before he destroys everything.
    Take back your trust in yourself. Take back your self awareness and your self esteem, take your self back.
    Be you. That will make us great again.
    hugs to all of you, You are just FINE HOW YOU ARE. I love you all.
    Tamara Benson
    ps: Trump is considered a Narcissist and Psychopath by studies and evaluations done by seemingly legit therapists, so it makes one ponder the thought. Do you have to be crazy to run the world? If so, count me out, I’d rather find a small tribe.

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  236. I was supposed to go to the Boston Women’s march today, but anxiety got the best of me. I was here feeling terrible about myself when I thought of The Bloggess, because I always feel understood when I read the tweets and blog posts. I made it here, and I feel better already. One breath at a time. Thank you.

  239. Oh, Jenny. You don’t know how much this post helped me. I couldn’t get out of bed today. And then, this afternoon, I did. And I was proud of myself. Well, just about 20 minutes ago, I started to fall again. I heard myself have distorted thoughts, and I kept trying to interrupt them by saying “NO!!” aloud to myself. And then, “Depression Lies” Popped into my head. So I began re-listening to Furiously Happy on Audible, because it always makes me feel good and understood. Hearing your voice calmed me. I went to your twitter to thank you, and I saw a tweet you wrote which directed me here. And it’s just what I needed. I couldn’t march today because I couldn’t get out of bed, and I felt like a failure as a woman because of it. But you made me feel okay. I got out of bed. I’m here right now. And you’re right. It’s gonna be okay. Thank you, Jenny. I love you.

  240. What is with you guys? (I’m speaking to the marchers out there.) where is your freaking national pride and solidarity? AREN’T THINGS BAD ENOUGH WITHOUT YOU ADDING TO IT. Yes, we got to stick together, but by that I man, as a country, as Americans! Supporting our President, like him or not. Show some patriotism for Christ’s sake! He, (Trump) hasn’t even been in office a week. Plus too many people are whining about this and that when he hasn’t even mentioned the this and that cap! If some group/faction/nation/zealot/lone wolf or freaking alien from outer space wanted to take us all out now would be the time! MANY OF YOU call yourselves “Americans”, well by God, act like one!
    P.S. Hugs~Love~Friendship to you Jenny!

  241. Everyone faces adversity everyday. I can’t get onboard with the few who are curled up in a fetal position and taking days off work to ‘mourn’ a presidential inauguration. All of my sympathy to anyone with a mental disorder, but let’s put this into perspective. Life will go on and we will all find our way. We are Americans. And for those who are plotting an escape from the US of A, I wish you godspeed. If it will ease your mental despair, that would probably be the kindest thing you can do for yourself. And in the end, self-kindness and self-care are the best way to live your life with happiness and purpose.

  242. Thanks Ms. Lawson, and to all of you here, for sharing your fears and your support. I am possibly a bit of a minority among the readership here, being male and a former soldier, but I find the community here invaluable. Fear does not go away if we ignore it. We need to look it in the eye, understand it, and take the proper steps to address it. And it’s hard, as we all know. Honesty matters. Sharing matters. Respect matters. I am so grateful to see that here.

    I did not know how worried and upset I was about the turn my country has taken until I saw all the marchers in the streets yesterday. Then I was so uplifted and overjoyed that I realized how long I’d been holding down my own fears. I am grateful for all those women who came together in record time to create not one, but MULTIPLE expressions of their willingness to stand up for what is right, decent, and kind. The outpouring of strength, of love, and of creativity was just overwhelming. This is how we will survive and overcome! I did not march yesterday, as my wife was unwell, but our daughter marched in a sister event overseas, and I am so proud of her.

    I want to remind you of some words that we probably all know, so attribution is unnecessary:

    “When you can’t run, you crawl, and when you can’t do that, you find someone to carry you.”

    Whether you are running, crawling, or finding someone to carry you, we are all in this together. Thanks to all of you for carrying me. I wish you all strength, love, and hope for your individual and collective struggles.

  243. Thank you Jenny, as always for keeping me sane and laughing in the face of despair. I marched yesterday in Michigan and saw some amazing signs. My favorite was “Chin up. Fangs out.”

  245. Thank you for everything. Thank you today especially for you gift with gifs!

  246. In John Buchan’s exploration of the political questions raised by the Civil Wars in Scotland in the 1700’s, Montrose a key figure at the time articulated that ‘if you upset the just proportion of the Law you will gain not liberty but confusion, and it will have that anarchy which gives chance to the spoiler, and out of anarchy will some day a man of violence who will tyrannically make order again’, and adds, ‘it is the way of the world’. John Buchanan wrote this in his book ‘Witch Wood’, in 1927, a few years after the Bolshevik Revolution in Russia and shortly before Hitler established the tyrannical order of the Third Reich.

  248. I am not an American, but since the future of your country and the direction it takes is so inextricably tied to the world, I’ve followed this election cycle with great interest and increasing amounts of dismay. Not in my wildest dreams did I imagine the eventual outcome, and while it’s bad, what happened the next day was so goddamn amazing. I hope y’all pull together, stay strong, fight every injustice to the best of your ability, and forgive yourself when it seems too hard and you can only stay inside your home and recover. Take care of yourselves. It’s okay. It WILL get better.
    Hugs.

  251. Triply. Great name for a vegan. Not that it’s bad. I don’t vare. But if you really think you can put up such a pathetic statement, then maybe I can too. Thanks lovey. Yippee!!!!! 🐚🍸🦑🏝🚁🎊🐙🐙🎉🐳🌏😎🐨🇳🇿❤

  252. Well said! It’s a tough week for me as well for a variety of reasons. I keep hoping it’s going to be better next week! Sometimes that’s all you can do. 🙂

  254. Our unfortunate little situation activates my terrified inner child — the big scary fake people who were supposed to take care of me then are back. And after I’ve fought my whole life to retell the story, once again I’m expected to live in Crazytown and pretend it’s ok? Yes to bunnies and kitties!

  255. Your optimism is blinding your reality. Protestors come out only when things are bad.

    (I understand what you mean but I see the bad but I also choose to see the good because that makes me keep fighting. The fact that protestors are there to stand up for others is a good thing. ~ Jenny)

  257. I love your books and your posts!!! I can relate to so many things!! I have had crippling anxiety for a long time!! I’ve been trying to find the cure and when I learned this I just had to share: I just found out that 9 times out of 10 anxiety is caused by PARASITES. (SAY WHAT??) Experts say 70-90% of the population has them, but because we are a “first world country” no on thinks to test or treat that!!! Yeah, parasites are stealthy but they leech our minerals (zinc, magnesium, iron, b vits etc..) and then we get all deficient and we get anxious, panic-attacky and can’t deal with stuff. –as well as other mental health issues. Wow! Worth looking into, no?

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  260. Thank you so much for this. It’s what I needed for a while. I’m a bit late to the party 🙁

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