I’m sure I’ll find this funny eventually.

in Random Crap

If you’ve been following here you know we had an upstairs sink overflow which flooded through my office ceiling and then our washing machine broke the same day and flooded the laundry room and kitchen and I’ve been living with severe anxiety disorder in a house of workmen and plastic tarps and industrial blowers, but today all the plastic was removed (except for the bit that covered the hole they had to cut in my ceiling) and the world seemed almost normal for a moment – until the insurance adjuster and contractor showed up to talk about construction and ripping up the warped floors -which they probably can’t match because they’re 40 years old- and I may have felt a bit sorry for myself because having strangers in my house is like living in a bucket of razors but I told myself that this was very little for normal people and I soldiered on and felt very proud of myself for not hiding in a closet.  And then they left and 10 minutes later I heard this terrible tapping noise and I realized THAT WATER WAS POURING INTO MY OFFICE AGAIN.  So I screamed for Victor who did not hear me because he’s on a conference call and is used to blocking me out as I found that someone (either the contractor, the adjustor or the cat they accidentally let in) had turned the same flooded sink on AGAIN and it was pouring all over the bathroom.

So now I’m legit crying and the water mitigation people have to come back in today and start over and Victor and I have decided that we’re going to rip out the offending sinks altogether and replace them with ones that have an overflow (WHO MAKES SINKS WITHOUT OVERFLOW HOLES?) but the ones that came with the house are fancy ass custom-made ones so basically I’m going to destroy the most beautiful sinks I’ve ever seen and pay thousands of dollars out-of-pocket to do it (not including the thousands of dollars for my deductible for the floor damage) and I’m feeling very sorry for myself and also very bad about feeling sorry for myself since this is such a small problem compared to…I don’t know…the plague, I guess.

The good thing is that several people told me that flooding always happens in threes so we’re done now.  Right?

Please say I’m right.

Also, please don’t let me get the plague.

Please tell me it’s going to be okay.  I know it is.  I just need to hear it.

PS. As this was happening I was literally publishing these shirts in my shop.  Not sure if this is irony or just punishment.

PPS.  I made Victor get up on a ladder and pull down the tarp on my ceiling so that the water could escape but he didn’t want to because he was afraid we’d do more damage but I insisted and I was like, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? and then when he untaped it a torrent of water hit him right in the face and soaked his business suit and I’m going to just go hide in the closet now.

 

408 thoughts on “I’m sure I’ll find this funny eventually.”

Read comments below or add one.

  2. What a borken start to the year! It is all going to be okay, Jenny. Now we can all start helping you start shopping for sinks, and I’m sure among us we will find some doosies!

  4. Never say, “What could possibly go wrong?” It’s like calling down a curse from the universe. (We have plumbing problems in our bathroom too. Right now I have to brush my teeth in the bathtub.)

  5. Oh, sweet Jenny. It is going to suck big time, and then it is going to be okay. I promise.

  7. It is 150% going to be OK. For sure.*

    *Not a plumbing expert, just a person whose confidence in other peoples’ lives far outstrips her confidence in her own.

  9. oh wow that is a LOT for anyone to process. I can only handle one appliance/fixture breaking at a time, and dealing with insurance/contractors is worse than Wal-Mart on payday.

  10. I know it is a bummer to get rid of beautiful custom sinks but those things must be haunted, because how else do they keep turning on?!!!!!

    One day you’ll look back on this and laugh (because the alternative is to cry until you go to crazytown–like padded room, special jacket crazytown),

  11. We have only ever had one big leak at a time with several years in between the times (which, come to think of it, have been three water leaks total). I have a friend, though. who did have water leaks similar to yours practically back-to-back and it was a total of three. Weird shit.

    p.s. Maybe you should both hang out in the closet for awhile and hold each other.

  13. Well…fuck. Double fuck. Double borking fuck. At least you’ll be able to embarass Victor with more texts about plastic sheeting vaginas. So there’s that, I guess.

  14. Yes, it will be OK. You’ve gathered good people around yourself, just keep walking and trust them to walk with you. Whatever pace you can manage.

  15. I’ve read, “This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone, but this will pass.” I hang onto that thought. Maybe it will help you a little too. And there’s nothing wrong with feeling a little sorry for yourself all things considered. Sending hugs and positive stuff.

  16. Aw, Jenny, I’m so sorry. You need to take a vacation and get away from that house for a while. Or at least go stay in some fancy-schmancy hotel.
    PS Did I ever tell you that I have a stickee note on my desk with the names of people I pray for? Whenever I glance at it, or if I’m on a phone call with a boring client, I look over at it and pray for those people. You’re on my stickee!!

  17. I don’t know, Jenny. At this point, if it were me, I think I might be rooting for the plague or might just burn the house down. But I am a neat freak, and one dust ball sends me reeling, so ignore me. You are handling all of this like a champ. Don’t get the plague, don’t burn the house down, and just keep going. You fucking got this!

  18. I vote for hiding in a hotel until this all goes away. Bonus points if you can find a haunted one.

  20. When I lived in Maryland, every house problem we had was due to water. Like the time we were out all day and came home to find the kitchen floor floating because there was a pinhole leak in the pipe going to the faucet. It was raining in the basement, the living room rug was soaked, etc. etc. Or the time the sump pump failed and the basement flooded, ruining the motor to the clothes dryer. Or the time I left the upstairs bathroom sink running (no overflow hole) and water poured through the ceiling into the living room. It’s all something you’ll survive. It takes time and money, but it’s just “stuff”. It’ll be OK. Sending lots of warm, dry, thoughts!

  22. The fridge water line sprung a leak behind our fridge and sprayed for at least a week before we realized that the dog wasn’t peeing gallons of water in the hall, which then traveled across the hall, down the ceiling, into the spare bathroom downstairs and down the back wall of the bathroom downstairs. Insurance people, abatement people, blowers, dehumidifiers and work people stomping through the house… then the blowers blew all of the dog fur around into a snow globe affect that clogged our ADT fire alarm, setting off the fire alarm at 0600 one fine morning. Between the alarm going off and the blowers, we didn’t hear ADT call to ask whether it was a real fire or we were cooking again, so they sent the fire department, which I had to go greet in my robe and slippers and apologize… so yeah, wait for that to happen and then everything gets fixed and life goes on.

  23. Oh how horrible! And I’ve been feeling sorry for myself just trying to stay warm in a 109 year old house. Peace!

  24. You are right, you won’t get the plague, and it’s going to be okay. Plus, you will definitely find this funny eventually because it’s too outrageous not to laugh. When you stop crying that is.

  26. That is some borked up shit. I am so sorry and it’s absolutely not overreacting to be upset. But you’re right. This is something you can recover from and it’s not the plague and it’s going to be o.k.

  27. Maybe just replacing the hardware with something that is not easy for the cats to turn on would do the trick.

  28. Not that it’s much consolation, but those overflow holes don’t always help. My dog once flooded our upstairs bathroom…his body blocked the hole.

  29. I had this with animal infestations. First moths, then mice, then pigeons. In the span of a month. I cried a lot and swore at a lot of animals, but in the end it was ok and I feel more resilient now.

  30. Holy compounding water disasters. I would be losing my damned mind. You will make it and I send virtual hugs though the ether. (And I thought I was having a bad day filling out financial aid forms.) You have reminded me that I MUST get the huge sinkhole in the exterior corner of the back room looked at by some kind of professional before the whole house falls down. I won’t mention how long the hole has been there.

  31. Clearly this is a great time to start marketing gigantic house-tampons that can just plug up those holes. “Not just for lady-gardens!”

  32. It will all be fine. Eventually, if not sooner. And in the end things will be even better than before.

  33. You’re right. And it is a lot. It’ll work out. It really will.
    Hang in there, you’re doing great.

  34. That can either be the sucky wnd to your sinks, or a wonderful beginning of a swimmijg pool with waterfall and water slide from the second floor… Hugs to you. It will come out right in the end. 💖

  35. Wow. So sorry to hear all this is happening. They say “when it rains, it pours” and you’ve literally experienced that in your office. I also have a sink with no overflow holes. Not sure why it’s not a standard requirement. Anyway, good luck with the clean up and thanks for sharing your life with us.

  37. I struggle with catastrophic thinking and frequent home repair problems (old house) so in the midst of them I’m convinced that the house will explode in our sleep and kill us. So it feels good to be able to tell someone else with confidence… It’s going to be ok.

  38. I send hugs, prayers, calming thoughts, and chocolate…definitely lots of chocolate.

  39. Can the contractor drill overflow holes in the existing sinks?? Drilling them would potentially get rid of the “hauntiness” as well…

    (Good question. I’m not sure if they can because of the way they’re made but I’ll be asking. ~ Jenny)

  40. This too shall pass. Apparently it will do so like a kidney stone, but it shall pass.

    Big hugs, extra gravy, and wine slushees!

  44. I wonder if plague-stricken Europeans in the 1500s thought to themselves, “I’m sure we’ll find this funny eventually”. They probably did right up to the moment they succumbed to the festering boils and other symptoms of the eventually-to-be-funny Black Death. You have already found a way to make your current plumbing crisis funny, so you are clearly winning. But don’t get plague. Being plague-free is your edge.

  45. On the up side – those folks working on your house are very happy to have somewhere inside to work this week because it if effin cold in our part of the world right now. Think of the wonderful gift you have given them. They love you right now, because those plumbers could be up to their knees in someones outside leak right now. You are right though….who builds a sink without an overflow???? I don’t care how pretty it is – the damn thing has to do its job, which is HOLD water.

  47. All I can say is that this just sucks and I wish you weren’t going through it. And that you won’t get the plague (probably).

  48. Yeah, all that crap is a lot for even the most “neurotypical” of us. Had a furnace failure a few years ago that caused heating pipes to burst, which then got pumped all over a room and flooded the garage. A fun time had by all. Add HUGE diesel-fired furnace to your industrial blowers. Luckily only one inside room got flodded because the system fill valve stuck shut. Otherwise we’d have flooded the entire first floor..

  49. It’s going to be okay. There is no shame in hiding in the closet for awhile. Make sure you take snacks and a cozy. Here’s a story to distract you: I recently bought my self a fleece, hoodied, “sleeping poncho”. It started as a joke, but it’s the most comforting thing I own right now. I wear it with a weighted heat pack around my shoulders and sit and drink tea. It reminds me of you because the hood is meant to look like a raccoon. Hope you find something that comforts you well. <3

  50. All those strangers in my house would drive me bananas! I’m already halfway to bananas from the five people that are still in my house from the holidays, and they are relatives! I know none of this helps except for maybe the misery and comfort angle.

  51. This has been a lot for you to deal with. I don’t know that I would handle it with half as much humour. You get to go sink shopping at least. I guess. Sorry, I’m afraid I am exactly the kind of person who finds sink shopping an exciting prospect. Would you be able to take a photo of your sinks to a sink seller (I’m assuming that’s what they’re called) to get as close a match as possible?

  52. Oh, no! Something similar happened to a friend of mine. He got through it. You will, too. Just keep telling yourself it will get better. Take pictures of the old sinks. Fall in like with new ones.

  53. It WILL be ok. As a fellow anxiety disordered person I KNOW how you feel w/ the workmen in your home. But this is temporary & be relieved it was clean water & not backup out of the toilet from the sewer that you didn’t even know backed up until you stepped in it when you went to do the laundry in your dungeon basement.

  54. It’s totally going to be okay
    I have a hole in my ceiling from a leak and I couldn’t handle having anyone come in to look at it because then I’d have to clean because my place is a mess and also deal with my upstairs neighbors and wow anxiety. So all in all, you’re dealing with this better than I did.
    I’m sending you super dry thoughts. That sounds weird, but you know what I mean.

  57. I’ve had some flooding nightmares here too, above my kitchen, in my garage, in the basement. It won’t stay “Borken” forever. 🙂 Give everyone a big hug, then let all your best words flow, with emphasis, outside in the yard. Like- FU%K THIS SH%T Having insurance is a bright spot but I know it still hurts. We are sending best wishes & magic your way.

  58. You will find it hilarious, eventually, and it’s all going to be fine.
    Take deep breaths. Lots of love and hugs and cups of tea.

  60. You could think of it this way: All the bad crap for the year is happening to you right now. Once you get this fixed, the rest of the year will be smooth sailing! And personally, I’d find the person or persons who left the tap running and hang them up by their fingernails – but I’m just a tad vindictive. Seriously… WTF.

  61. Oh Jenny I’m so sorry you’re going through this yet again! Big hugs and you will get through this. Tell Victor I’m sorry he got drenched.

  63. Well the only way to go is up. We recently remodeled both our bathrooms. Totally understand the not wanting people in the house.

  64. I’ve had 3 leaks in my lifetime. 2 were from the same 150 gallon oil tank that for some illegal reason was actually INSIDE our basement. The first time was in February 1998, and I lost a shit ton of baby stuff (along with the washer/dryer and various other stuff) that we had stored in the basement as the oil had just been filled for the second half of winter. The second time was on Mother’s Day 1999 and wasn’t too bad because it was almost empty. The last time was a flood in our upstairs bathroom and destroyed a box of Disney VCR tapes that we were storing in the dining room as a precaution against oil leaks in the basement. It’s overwhelming for someone 1 at a time. I still cry when I remember the things we lost.

  65. First I have to say that “Living in a bucket of razors” is SO TRUE. I’ve never put a name to that feeling, but that’s it exactly.

    Next I can tell you from experience that it will eventually be ok. We had ice dams (a Northern thing) a couple of years ago that caused water to pour into my office and my 12 year old’s bedroom (he had to sleep in the guest room for three months) AND the living room. I thought the house would never be the same again. And the insurance company gave us fits. But two year later, I can barely remember the details of the trauma (may have blocked them).

    Eventually, it will be ok.

  66. Oh, my dear Lord, you must be hanging on by a thread! I don’t even have the anxiety and other disorders you do, and I’d like to run someone over for what you’re dealing with! Whoever came to your house and LEFT THE WATER RUNNING needs to come out, clean up the mess, throw a whole huge bucket of money at you, and beg your forgiveness!! It has to be over now, so, yes, it will get better. Sorry about your sinks, though; that sucks. Can’t they just put an overflow hole into the custom-made sinks you already own? That can’t possibly be more costly than what you’re going to have to do otherwise. Good luck, and congrats on staying out of the closet!! You’re a trooper! xo

  67. It’s going to be okay.

    (Also who the hell goes and randomly turns on the sink in someone else’s house??? And LEAVES IT ON??? Especially someone’s house where they’re there to inspect WATER DAMAGE??? Either the contractor or the adjuster needs a TALKING TO.)

  68. I’m so sorry. Flooding is a hassle. Having workmen in your house is a hassle. Having to give up beautiful, dysfunctional sinks is a hassle. Dealing with all of it on anxiety is torture. It will all be okay. Honest.

  69. I went through this last summer after a demon washing machine broke the valve. It’s pretty dang strong. Anyway, my brother died unexpectedly while I visited Wisconsin and when I went home to pack my clothes for the funeral, the ceiling had collapsed and water poured in from the upstairs laundry. All the floors had to be refinished. But we called 24-7 Restoration and they took care of the water damage, got the valve replaced immediately and took care of all the contractors. We moved out for the month of June and went to Europe while everything was repaired.
    Now it’s all done and beautiful, almost…
    https://susielindau.com/2017/05/05/when-destiny-packs-your-bags/

  70. What a pain in the butt. But this too will pass. We spent Christmas eve under the sink and in the basement trying to clear a clogged drain. I was cranky until I realized this just made us like a Christmas comedy movie family. I was in my PJ’s, standing on a stool so I could plunge the sink. My husband was cursing in the basement with a drain snake. It was funny… once we fixed it and made it too the Christmas Eve Children’s Pageant at the church on time 🙂

  71. Aw man. That sucks.

    Could you repurpose the fancy sinks as garden planters? Or put them in a different bathroom that is more frequently used so that they’d be sure to be turned off efficiently?

    Either way, your reaction is pretty damn normal so don’t chalk it up to brain sprites.

  72. It will be okay or it won’t. In the end – you will be you. Good or bad….. And YOU are fabulous. Trust me – I know fabulous when I see it.

    Notes for Victor:
    1) when on a ladder – always be off set from anything FALLING on you
    2) Thank you for doing that for your wife
    3) The next house you get – make sure there is a mother-in-laws quarters (2nd house) so your wife can find a retreat when these things happen. I find having two houses quite useful for my anxiety. 🙂

  74. ” I may have felt a bit sorry for myself because having strangers in my house is like living in a bucket of razors but I told myself that this was very little for normal people and I soldiered on and felt very proud of myself for not hiding in a closet.” Thank you for this description….it’s it exactly. Strangers in house, No. No. No. But I believe in the threes, so you are done.

  75. Oh goodness. I needed to read this. This makes me feel glad that I’m not the only one having issues. Yesterday I heard the sound of water running through my pipes. Luckily no flooding. Just some minor dripping in my basement. I have no idea where the leak is. I believe in a wall or some other inaccessible place. I shut the water off last night to save water/prevent possible massive unseen damage. This morning I turned the water back on to brush my teeth and such and the cold water pipe is now frozen. On top of that, my furnace has been quitting periodically and I woke up to a 53 degree house. I’m now having issues with my gas fireplace but I was able to get it started after about 50 tries. Furnace is now running which is great but will probably shut off again in 36 hours. I have an HVAC/Plumber coming soon. Also, I have a sinus infection and bronchitis. I’m hoping all this shit is just the bad shit for the year getting itself over with and the rest of the year will be great. Here’s hoping things get better!

  76. Your sinks MAY have overflow capability that is hidden. I don’t know what type of sink it is, but most corian sinks come with the overflow channel covered by a thin bit of corian (Maybe that’s easier to deal with in the molding/forming process?). What this means is that the installer has to deliberately open up that orifice to allow the overflow channel to do it’s job. Some don’t. Just a thought.

  78. You are stronger than all of this! Don’t compare how this may be a “little” thing to someone else. It’s a big thing to you and you should be gentle with yourself about it. Also, I would complain to the contractors/insurance adjusters/whomever was near the faucet that it was left on and any other damages you’re going to come after them for with pitchforks and torches! Or send hubby.

  80. Damn. I thought I was having a bad day. You will be okay. Getting there can be pretty yucky. You and I will survive. And laugh about how freaking stupid the beginning of 2018 was. ❤

  81. One thing to be thankful for, it’s winter and not summer which could have meant mold.
    Unless your cat has a habit of turning on that tap or faucet ( I forget which term to use. ) then I’d point out to them that their ppl left it on.

    I feel for you about strangers in the house. We just moved and had ppl in to replace appliances and install a dog door. The worst was the roof repair guy, I was too afraid to leave the house in case he fell off so was on the edge of a panic attack those two days.

  83. Maybe you should just install an indoor pool, then the water will be useful… unless it’s nasty water… then maybe you’d need a filter between the leak and the indoor pool…. you are doing better than I would… I’d just move rather than deal with people. I wouldn’t be able to afford to move though, so I’d probably just set up my tent in the backyard and live there… but then there are fisher cats here who make possums and swans look sweet, so I’d be afraid my cats would get eaten… or me… but then again, I’m currently living with wild snakes that occasionally sleep under my bed, and I would rather the snakes than invite pest control people to my house, so in your situation I’d probably live with the mildew and mold just so I wouldn’t have to pay strange people I don’t want in my house to be in my house…. I think i had a point but I’m too distracted by the idea of moving before my place floods so I can use the security deposit towards my next place, but do snakes count against security deposits??? It’s not like I invited them in! I don’t invite anyone who’s not a cat or a stray puppy into my house…

  85. I am so sorry. We were in our new house less than 3 months when one of the kids pooped a giant poop in the upstairs bathroom. It plugged the toilet which overflowed and ran through the ceiling to puddle poop water on my grandmother’s maple dining room table. Obviously, we had just increased our deductible to an insanely huge amount in order to save money. I feel your pain.

  86. Sending hugs your way (if you want them), and some advice: spontaneous vacation. When it gets to be too much, sometimes you just have to go hide somewhere, like a hotel off in the wilderness. My issues were less water and more dead rat in the walls and personal tragedy, but driving far away to a beautiful place really helped. I hope the water demons leave you alone for the rest of 2018.

  87. Nope, this is pretty damn horrible. It will be all right in the end because no situation stays static and you have a husband who will take several gallons of water in the face for you even when his better judgment says, don’t do it. My mom has terrible anxiety about strangers in her house, too, so she makes my dad deal with any and all workers. Hugs.

  88. It’ll be okay. But maybe just hide in a hotel for a while to be sure. hugs

  89. OMG! Sounds like the closet is the safest place for you at the moment. I applaud your mighty coping skills and yes, it will be alright and things will get better…guaranteed.

  90. We got back from 7 very stressful Christmases to a broken furnace (in below 0 degree weather), an oven emitting high levels of carbon monoxide, a flooded laundry room (main line drain clogged), and my husband’s car breaking down, all while trying to work from home and watch my 8 month old baby! That’s more than 3, does this mean it will be 6? I don’t think my poor little anxiety ridden heart can take much more. Any tips for not breaking out in stress related hives are appreciated!

  91. Yikes. That all sucks. Paired with your anxiety, that all really truly bigtime sucks.

    But, my friend, your soul is loved by many. You live in a comfortable home with a beautiful family of your own. You have the means to make the repairs. When they are complete you will have updated new sinks/floors/ceiling.

    Like at least one of your self employed artisan readers, you could instead be facing eviction at the end of the month because a health matter and no insurance has made working a challenge and your soldiering on and doing it anyway was brought to a halt last night because a necessary piece of equipment died the kind of death that makes doves cry leaving you without any means of income.

    Perspective.

    It WILL be okay.
    For both of us.
    For all of us.

  93. I’m so, so sorry. Perspective is good, but don’t sell yourself short by comparing yourself to others who have “bigger” problems. Your sanctuary has been violated. You’re entitled to some tears and many well-chosen swears. I suspect Victor has already taken care of the latter… Those fancy sinks can’t be re-plumbed? That sucks. It’s one thing to replace something that’s old and worn out, but it sucks when it’s something you actually like.

  94. It will be ok. It’s not the world devouring your soul, You’re stronger than house goblins & cats are great goblin killers. Warm huggz to you. It’ll be ok. Promise.

  95. Having lived through something similar in 2015 – main floor toilet flange burst while we were on vacation – i guarantee it gets better. AND, really better when its all done and you can look around and admire your wonderful taste in sinks, and floors, and new paint, and new rugs

  96. Nuts and Bolts! I’ve always said, don’t cry over broken things, just broken people, but I think this is an exception. I just don’t want you to get borken…

  97. Oh no!!! I’m sending you all the virtual hugs! Just think about how nice it will be when it’s all over and you can hide without water everywhere!

  98. EGBOK! (Everything’s going to be OK) And no plague. Count me in on Team Different Faucet. Otherwise, I’m sure that you will find a way to use your gorgeous sink somewhere else in the house. You’re too creative not to.

    Of course, now I want to see the sink. 😉

  99. Just FYI the non anxiety crowd does not often handle major house disasters any differently than you. Having strangers totally rearrange your house does make most people want to hide in a closet. Although the razor blade thing may be going a little further….but maybe not. So my point is you are doing well, hang in there. As for the sinks, I can see why you would want to remove the thing that started this plague, but I like the drilling overflow idea. Good luck! Go set up a comfy space in a closet so it’s there if you need it and take lots of before photos so you can see how far you’ve come when you get to the after.

  100. Having lived through something similar in 2015 – main floor toilet flange burst while we were on vacation – i guarantee it gets better. AND, really better when its all done and you can look around and admire your wonderful taste in sinks, and floors, and new paint, and new rugs

  101. Would love to see a picture of the original sinks…as long as it doesn’t make you feel worse…

  102. It will be all okay! After all your life has an overflow hole – your family and us. That sounds a lot grosser than I meant.

  103. It’s going to be okay! You don’t have the plague and the flooding is over now! Sending calm soothing vibes your way. It’s so hard for us introverted folks to have people in our house, especially when something has to be fixed. Hell, I get traumatised every time our complex sends out a crew with leaf blowers. I like leaves and hate noise, 💜💜💜

  105. It’s going to get better. In the meantime, you might want to start leaving out some offerings for whatever water sprites or house elves you seem to have offended. Can’t hurt, right?

    Hugs, lady. It’s OK to want to put things into perspective by telling yourself other people have far bigger problems, but you’re also allowed to be stressed the fuck out over this shit for a few minutes. Hang in there.

  107. It WILL be okay – – some day … but right now, it’s migraine country.

  109. Is there any chance you can have someone retrofit overflow mechanisms in the custom sinks??

  110. Oh Jenny…none of what you’re dealing with is a “small thing” for anyone “normal” (is there such a thing as normal??). This would be a big damn deal to a lot of people and having your home overrun with strangers, even helpful and well-meaning strangers, is not a situation anyone wants to be in. Keep doing what you need to cope and get through it. You’re stronger than you realize!

  111. My house flooded in 2015; after I lost my beloved corgi. I’m on a hill that everyone thought was “flood-proof”. So I feel for you. 6 months after I had new tile floors put in, I commented that if I won the lottery, I would build a house that had flowing water (fountains/pools) in it, and my smart-ass best friend said, “didn’t you just have flowing water in your house?” Pwned: Cheryl W.

  112. so sorry this is happening! Construction work is always stressful. I have 2 ideas… if your cat is really able to turn your faucet on, can you change out the faucet instead of the sink? (yes, they should have overflow on them though) And if your cat can’t turn it on, do you think you have a ghost attached to one of your collected items? Just thinking…

  113. Well, I think Victor should’ve know what was going to happen when he pulled back the tarp. I mean really, after all that’s happened?! Also, never say “nothing else can go wrong” because challenging the universe doesn’t usually work out for anyone but the universe.

  114. I can’t even……that sucks huge rocks and it’s your flood and you can cry if you want to. And it is fluckdam close to the plague because plagues involve floods but it it is not your fault. And the slamdamidgit water person who left the faucett on or let the cat in needs to PAY! I’m going to go look for cute animal photos for you because I simply don’t know what else to do. Fluck the flicking Poisodon water demons.

  115. So, a few years ago, we had two upstairs bathrooms flood within a couple of weeks of each other. Both toilets. They had to rip out the bathroom cabinets and the floor in the master bedroom and bathroom and the kitchen ceiling and part of the living room ceiling. They were still working in the bathroom but had finished the ceilings when the second bathroom sink overflowed and messed up the freshly finished living room ceiling. I was screaming and crying (home alone) and franticly trying to mop up the water with towels. So I feel your pain. It’ll be ok in the end. It just sucks in the meantime.

  117. Find a good astrologer, babe . . . they will tell you what it all means (definitely do NOT read your fortune in the newspaper!). You’re working on your spiritual PhD right now, not that it helps to know that during the miserable chaos of it all. Elevating your readers and eliciting their best sides in response to your misfortune is one of the highest and most challenging of soul projects.

    Or maybe it IS all “random crap.” Whichever makes you feel better . . .

    ;o)

  118. It is going to be ok. Really really. I would be 10-shades of purple from yelling my rage to the world (the Hulk is my spirit animal), so honestly, tears sound like a more normal response.

    And Shari has a good idea, if you are up for it. I think a good plumber could add overflow holes in your fancy sinks.

  119. Honey babe, I think you are doing great. All that trauma would have had me crying in a ball on the floor. Especially the people. And the tarps and noise.

  120. Just a thought about the sinks. Could overflow drains be added to your existing sinks for the same or less cost than replacing?

  121. Would a floor drain be easier than replacing sinks? Let ’em overflow; the water just goes down the floor drain.

  122. So sorry this has happened! If it makes you feel any better, my bathroom sinks don’t have over flow holes/ drains either… When buying the house (2014 a new house), the inspector put in his report that they needed to be replaced with sinks that had them… Builder and sink manufacturer both refused to redo them since “that’s how they make sinks these days”, the overflow drains aren’t needed… Um, what?!?!

  123. Just don’t do what I did. Which was moved to NM when the repair construction got too bad for me to handle. Then I nearly died. And now I’m in NM. With scorpions. I don’t think I mentioned the scorpions in my response to your last post. However, winter in only about a month and a half long, which is nice, because I could be where there are -50F wind chills.

    But there are scorpions.

  125. Well, bork. I had something similar happen many years ago. It was a painful and expensive endeavor, but I am still alive. Marginally less sane, but alive. So, there’s that. Here’s to less flowing water in 2018.

  126. Can’t believe you’re still standing, and/or cowering, after all this. Woman, you are a mighty warrior! IT WILL BE OKAY. You may want to consider purifying the house with white sage when the waters finally recede. Hugs to you.

  127. It’s going to be okay. Sending you a gentle hug from across the state. It’s going to be okay.

  128. Sending you warm, dry hugs to be used as needed! We have a phantom leak in our garage. Every heavy rain mystery puddles appear, but we have yet to find the source. One day! As to those sinks, maybe repurpose as bird baths or donate to Habitat for Humanity?

  129. Our 1/2 bath once had sewage back up into in… from the outside sewage line (ew) and the washer leaked immediately after while washing poo towels… and our home owners said it was our fault… This happened 2 months after we moved in. So I definitely feel you. Think of it as a chance to remodel…

  130. Sweet Jesus, Jenny. That’s a lot of crap to go down all at once. Hopefully the last domino has fallen but if not, it’s okay. it’s going to be okay. Virtual hugs from an Internet friend.

  131. Turn those old, beautiful sinks into birdbaths. Your feathered friends will be so impressed. (That’s my version of turning lemons into lemonade – sorry … it’s all I got.)
    “Bucket of razors” – now I have a name for that feeling. Thanks. I think.
    If I could, I’d stand there in a pair of hip-waders, give you hug, and help bail.

  132. Oh yikes. Sorry you’ve had a rough time. I hate construction projects. Especially, you know, mandatory-out-of-your-control ones.

  133. I’m sorry the universe is being an asshole to you. It’s currently being an asshole to me as well. We should join forces and and plan vengeance. Also, by join forces I of course mean in an “introverts unite seperately” sort of way because there is 0% chance I’m leaving my house today or possibly tomorrow.

  134. Can you change the faucets instead? Maybe to something that requires some kind of lock?

  136. We had a massive leak (caused by our condo association not clearing our roof drains before we got six inches of rain in a matter of hours, but of course they exempted themselves from any liability) that resulted in our ceiling collapsing onto our bed…while we were in it! The sound of dripping still makes me anxious, so of course my parrot learned to make that noise…

  139. You need the faucets like the have at the airport that turn off automatically after one minute, Can’t believe I am recommending an airport feature as a “fix”…

  141. One word. Move.

    I’m so damn sorry all of this happening. (That bucket of razor blades spent a few months up here this summer and dear lord, I hope it doesn’t stay at your place too long.)

  142. So… you need an emergency retreat. Call an exorcist and turn the plumbing over to Victor, then embark upon a two week bug out to ANYWHERE. A cabin in the woods. A spa. Motel 6. The backroom at Home Goods.

    HomeGoods would be my choice… after they close you can curl up on one of the couches, hug an oversized plushie and snack on all the fancy imported snacks. Plus you’ll get first pick of any new shipments of weird.

  143. 1) It will be okay. I promise!!
    2) Victor maybe deserved aface full of water for not paying attention when you hollered for him, even if he WAS on a conference call!
    3) Bucket of razor blades sounds very unpleasant. I’d go with the closet.

  144. Oh hun, that’s a rough day. hugs from afar

    I have a desk in my closet, so I can hide under my desk and in my closet at the same time. You can join me, anytime.

  145. Omg this is a lawyer’s dream! Now you get to file a claim against your own insurance company! Or your contractor! Or your cat!!!!
    But seriously? This sucks ass and I’m sorry that you are going through this.

  146. It’s going to suck a big one…then it’ll be okay. I promise. Plus, someone said bad things happen in 3s so you’re done for a while.

  147. I’m sorry this happened to you. If it helps, I just had a commode on the second floor have the supply pipe break, flood the bathroom and the adjacent carpeted hall, then it leaked thru to the first floor where it flooded the laundry room – not really a big deal, being the laundry room and all – but then ran across the floor, flooded the next room, then ran out thru the sliding glass door and into the yard. Lots of clean up, and still the second floor commode doesn’t work. So, you’re not alone, tho it’s company I bet you wish you didn’t have. But cheer up, things do usually come in threes, so you’ve got your three out of the way and done with. But you’re right, who makes sinks with no overflow hole?

  148. EGBOK! (everything’s gonna be ok!) <3 <3 <3
    I am severely borken, too. Let’s be borken buddies?

  149. you’re 100% gonna be ok my house flooded three times in a row a couple years ago but not at all since

  150. I’m with you. Dealing with far too many issues at the start of the new year, but yes. It’s going to be okay. Everything works out in the end, and think of the magnificent blog-fodder these atrocities are. At least there’s that.

  151. Oh this is awful and for the contractors to repeat the problem is worse. I hope the replacement sinks and hand basins are just as attractive as the originals.

  153. Congratulations on getting all of the disasters over and done with at the very beginning of the year. YOU’RE AMAZING. Everything is absolutely going to be fine, except for those morons who designed a sink with no overflow hole. Things are probably not going to go well for them. Karma’s a bitch.

  154. Just so you know, I would NEVER eventually find that funny. Period. Don’t worry about waiting for that.

  155. Everything IS going to be okay…and I am telling myself this too. In the last week, both of my toilets have become irrevocably clogged, my kitchen faucet came loose, my dishwasher began leaking, my car battery died, and my bathroom door broke and won’t close. On top of homeowner issues, my 4-year old son has been refusing to poop in the potty, opting instead to hold it until it explodes in his pajamas in the middle of the night. And all of this while my mother-in-law is staying with us. But it’s okay, because we are also trying to get approved for a loan for a new home…in which we will live….with my mother-in-law.

    This is a good idea, right?

  156. Bleargh. It’s going to be okay. I totally get the feeling sorry for yourself AND feeling bad about it. And it’s really cold right now. But at least the holidays are over.

  158. Upon moving into our home we were greeted with flooding incident after flooding incident. A sprinkler burst and flooded my neighbor’s entire yard. I awoke to a near heart attack as our doorbell was being angrily rung, repeatedly. Loudest dang doorbell I’ve ever heard in my life. Who would have known that incident would foreshadow what was to come. Every time we heard water it was a huge panic ruining around the house trying to find where it was coming from. I woke up to 40’x6′ of fully saturated carpet when rain water flooded in from under our back door. Walls and door frame damaged. Insurance wouldn’t cover it because it was an “act of God”. Shortly after, the drain pipe for the washing machine was clogged and an entire washing machine full of soapy water was expelled onto the floor, ruining the bottom of two walls. Then it was coming from under the bathroom sink. Then the washing machine pipe again! Wth!? Then the “repaired” roof leaked while we were gone and we came home to a huge bowed ceiling with pockets of water right over our bed. Except I didn’t know they were pockets. I pushed one with my fingernail and a stream ran out. We had to replace half of the ceiling. Did I mention when the bathroom flooded and the water went under the wall, flooding the closet and all the things I had stored on the floor? Or the time that several water puddles were discovered along the walls of the living room, where there were tiny cracks in the cement outside letting rain water seep in? Oh, and let’s not forget the three windows that were not sealed properly so again, rain water streaming on in. At one point I really wanted to demolish the house. I thought I’d end up in a mental health hospital. I’m still in a panic when I think I hear water flowing from…somewhere. Ugh, just writing this is giving me anxiety. Hang in there Jenny. At the least, you are not alone.

  159. I would love to say it will get better, but I can’t make a promise I can’t keep. If it helps, it really can be worse. I bought a brand new, built just for my single mom self and 2 kids, 2 years ago. This past July I was having plumbing issues on one side of the house and called a plumber, only to find out that the builders never capped off a pipe underneath my house and my pipes had been spilling sewage under my house for about 2 years! The builder came and cleaned it up, but since then, 2 of my neighbors have had inspections done on their houses and they found over a $100k worth of damage done because of negligence by the builder. I am next. I’ve been putting it off because I am afraid to know. I’m just waiting for that extra 4 feet in my bedroom to fall off while I’m sleeping (huge cracks in my walls). So, that’s me starting my new year (also, with bronchitis).
    So, good luck to both of us!! I can’t wait to see your new sinks. At least you know your house will be fixed, I’m gearing up for a battle. Fun.

  160. It does come in three’s so you’re done…maybe you should just move…I think I would…oh wait, when I first moved in this house the roof blew off and i stayed…and it was winter…and snowing…into my bedroom! So stay!

  162. {{{Hugs}}} I can sacrifice a chicken for you, if you want. (It’s on the menu tonight and it will be delicious with roasted veggies and couscous, so it’s no trouble.)

  163. How does the water keep getting turned on? Was this a negligent workman who left the water running, or are the kitties climbing onto the counter and turning on the sinks for a drink of water? Or maybe it is ghosts…you never can tell.

    (The first was Hailey not turning the sink all the way off. The second is anybody’s guess. It was flooded at least once before we moved in though so at this point I’m just blaming the sinks. And ghosts. ~ Jenny)

  164. Get thee to a hotel! Bring all the pillows and blanket fort materials and tell Victor to call you when your he curse has been removed! (Totally serious!)

    Sending all sorts of non-anxiety-inducing love your way!

  165. Unexpected home repairs always suck. It is a normal part of life to be stressed and frustrated by them. Of course, your stress & frustration may be quadrupled compared to a more boring person. We are all different. Such is life. It is grand and glorious and a gift while you have it.

    Hugs. Hope it will be over soon for you. The plumbing problems. Not life. 🙂

  168. First of all, it’s going to be okay. (You asked us to tell you that.)
    Secondly, does Victor wear a business suit for his conference calls? Is he visible in these calls? If so, does he just wear the top of the suit and whatever he likes south of the waistline? Or, am I totally misunderstanding the order of events and how his conference calls work?

  169. Move your office… or at least your computer.
    If possible, replace the plumbing or whatever, then reinstall the beautiful faucets.
    I think you lost a parenthese somewhere so here’s a couple extra: ))))
    Love you!!!

  171. This sounds very much like my 2017 went. I was all ready to start a diet and exercise plan around January 2017, when I noticed the toilet was not flushing well. So I called a plumber. This created a chain of Very Bad House Things that lasted the rest of the year:

    The plumber discovered that I had a major sewage line break which was going to cost many thousands of dollars to fix, which I didn’t have.
    So I decided to do a cash-out refinance of my house, which wouldn’t go through because I needed to replace my roof. I told them I needed the cash in order to finance the roof replacement, but that didn’t fly.
    I ended up taking out a terrible butt-reaming loan in order to replace the roof, in order to get the refinance, in order to fix the sewage line. (Sounds a bit like “there was an old lady who swallowed a fly”, doesn’t it?)
    While waiting for the roofers to fit me in, we had a very, very wet few weeks, during which time the roof started leaking into my bathroom.
    When I was finally able to get the new roof, and the refinance went through and I could pay off the terrible loans, my HVAC died.
    So I replaced the HVAC, finally got the sewage line fixed, and had just enough left over to buy a new stove on super-discount over Columbus Day.
    Now the tub isn’t draining properly. I’m scared to have anyone look at it.

    I hope your home repairs are resolved more swiftly!

  172. It’s not a little thing for normal people. It’s horribly uncomfortable and nerve wracking which means you have now earned a medal or a super hero cape or possibly both. It DOES get better and then you are pleased you got through it and never ever ever want it again and find out that there are “leak alarms” and look into getting those so you never have to be greeted by indoor floods again.

    I’m pretty unflappable and I stressed out horribly when my washer overflowed and took out half of my house.

  173. Houses going to hell are the WORST. Heck, I’m somewhat introverted and have only mild anxiety disorder, I stand up in front of people and teach for a living, and I hate hate hate having workers in the house. We just had to have our sewer line replaced (it kept backing up into the basement–ick) and I literally took the kids and drove 1100 miles to hang out with my family while my husband stayed at home to deal with it. You’re not alone, it sucks but it will be ok. Also, consider the option of leaving home for a bit and letting Victor deal with it.

  174. “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.” –Julian of Norwich, 14th-century mystic. (I don’t know why I find this saying so comforting– maybe because it’s sort of mantra-esque? I say it to myself when things get overwhelming, and it helps.)

    Oh, and those shirts are great! I’m buying one! 🙂

  175. EVERYONE would have major anxiety in the situation you’re describing. It stresses me out just to read it, and I don’t normally have anxiety problems. You’re doing GREAT! Big hugs!!!

  176. If you need a place to hide from the water and perhaps a drenched Victor, you can come stay at my house.

  177. I wanted to cry last night. I fell when I got home, busted open my knee. Still haven’t fixed the leak under my kitchen sink. Then heard this load noise to find out it was water leaking behind my fridge. I am adopting “borked” for my word of the year. I’m glad I’m not alone!!

  178. “Did you ever see a cloud that didn’t move? It will be okay in a day or two” (Ray Bonneville. Look him up, his music is a pleasure.)
    It may be longer than a day or two but you will live through this and come out the other side. I will burn sage and light a candle to banish the borken.

  180. Wouldn’t it cost far less to have the current sinks retrofitted with an overflow valve?

    I’m sorry this is happening, but it will get better. It will be okay.

    (Looking into it. Not sure if it’s possible because of the way they’re built though. ~ Jenny)

  181. I understand. You are not alone. You were VERY brave to deal with all those people! It’s almost over. Hang in there. You can do this! It will get better.

  182. Anybody would cry and scream if all those things happened. And the comments to this have shown you are part of a community of house leaks/flooding/disasters. Kinda like the camaraderie of all the flooded folks in the Houston area for Hurricane Harvey. The people I know in Houston who got flooded in Harvey are now beginning to move back into their houses after gutting the whole first floors. It will be OK eventually but living with the renovations will suck.

    You now have the most disastrous leak story to tell. You win the disasters! I think it could be told with interpretive dance, especially the part about Victor’s suit.

  183. My last house had several floods. They weren’t funny then, and they aren’t funny now. But I lived through them and you will too. It’ll be okay. <3

  184. That is some borkened up shit. And everything will be okay. Not today, but soon. You can make it till then; I believe in you.

  186. It’s going to be ok… this will all just be a memory soon, and you’ll have a pretty new room.

  187. holy cow that’s crazy and I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. I dread when it’s my turn. Too bad you can’t put an overflow hole in those damn beautiful sinks.

  188. I am a very resilient person and all of that would have me wanting to hide, too. I find ten minute nervous breakdowns are actually a very helpful coping strategy.

    And you will survive this.

    I serve as chaplain at a certain camp each year. The year that scaled up quickly from a broken window and terrible thunder storm, to suddenly no running water and we couldn’t figure out why (necessitating driving to town for bottled water to drink and cook with and hauling water from the creek for everything else for forty or so people), (not really bubonic) plague, and a forest fire (among other things) all in the course of four days has come to be called Camp Apocalypse. And yet no one actually died and many campers even came back the next year. You will survive this.

  189. In a 6 month period, our 2nd story washing machine overflowed and leaked through our dining room chandelier, the water main broke and flooded the entire downstairs, and then the pipes froze during a polar vortex and then the townhouse maintenance people (we were renting) insulated them.. after they’d already frozen… soooo our whole house flooded. You’re not alone. And maybe one day, you’ll be able to laugh about it. It took me a while.

  190. I met my best friend when water started pouring into my house from the apartment upstairs. I ran up, and it turned out her son had plugged the tub and turned it on. I ran up and they got it turned off, and my landlord dealt with the damage in his typical slum lord manner. A few weeks later water starts pouring into my apartment again, and I again run upstairs. These neighbors were new, so I didn’t know them yet. The husband, and the wife, in a towel, come to the door. Apparently she filled the bath too full and the water that went into the overflow hole came into my apartment. I looked at her and said, I’d love to get to know you, just not after you fall into my apartment naked with your bathtub. We’ve been friends since. (Heck, our oldest are long distance dating, as we live in England now)

  191. you are absolutely going to be okay because you are a badass motherfucking sorcerer of light and a gift to everyone who knows you in real life or only through the interwebs! also, i’m pretty sure you know qualify as the empress of water. ALL water. everywhere.

  192. Oh JFC on a mother frakking totem pole, I am SO sorry. D: (and now I want to see somebody who does wood carving do a native looking totem pole with Jesus on it for some odd reason. That would be nifty.)

  193. I’m sorry Jenny. You can do it I believe in you. You are a magical unicorn and can do anything. Plus we’re all here for you.

  194. Oh lady, I hear you. We had a tornado drop a tree on our house and had water damage to our ceilings, siding ripped off, windows broken. It took fighting the insurance company for 4 months to start getting things fixed, then another month to complete the work. It was. Exhausting but we made it. Sending hugs your way. You will survive this, promise.

  195. i think you should take your fancy ass sinks & make some killer birdbaths outside. or maybe a “cement pond” for your fairy garden! or, if you don’t like one of your neighbors, you could put all the fixtures on THAT side of your yard & plant daisies or petunias in them. Toilet included…. sweet & yet, slightly warped!

  196. This was my 2017. My entire first floor was underwater and therefore was gutted. There were lots of bad moments and anxiety/panic attacks over the nine months it took to resolve it, however there was good that came of it. I was able to finally ask my doctor for help and received it in the form of a great deal of compassion and understanding, as well as a Lexapro prescription, which I really needed for the anxiety before all this but wasn’t as complelled to admit. I also now have an amazing personally custom designed first floor, which includes a new kitchen and bathroom, and all new flooring! The house and I are better than ever! Sending a virtual shoulder to lean on. Hang in there lady.

  197. Material for a future book? From the glass half empty, glass half full, glass overflowing and leaking through your ceiling perspective. The worst is when a crisis happens when you’re out of spoons – feeling so empathetic for you. I think it’s time to call in an exorcist.

  198. You know this disaster will pale in comparison to the next disaster that is lurking right around the corner ..? Or so I tell myself.

  199. I currently have a hole in my kitchen into the basement after a small leak we didn’t notice ate away at the subfloor. My boyfriend nearly fell through the floor. This too shall pass. We can do this!

  200. “having strangers in my house is like living in a bucket of razors” – This is beautifully captured. It’s physically painful for me to have strangers in my house. Only slightly less painful to have people I know who don’t live here.

    This WILL pass and you WILL laugh about it one day, but probably not for a while. And that’s okay. Because life has other nice things in it to hopefully distract you for a while.

  202. It WILL be okay. If it makes you feel any better, we had a leak due to a washing machine malfunction and needed lots of repairs. The total deductible was subtracted out of the restoration company total, so we weren’t actually out any cash. I hope the same is true for you.

  203. Please don’t minimize how big a deal home issues are – you are not overreacting! It’s overwhelming to have your safe place damaged and invaded, even if the invaders are trying to help correct the issue. You can do this Jenny! Who needs fancy sinks anyways?

  204. It will be OK.

    Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that selling the house and moving into an RV is the perfect solution, though. Shit still goes wildly, painfully, and expensively wrong, and sometimes at highway speeds.

    Guess how I know.

  205. We have a leak under our kitchen sink and I am waiting for plumber that cant get here until tomorrow due to the extra cold weather in north Texas and so many busted pipes. Not looking forward to having strangers that I Am Paying to invade my space! Concerned about that more than how I will be able tp pay for it. Powerball is crazy high right now so couldn’t hurt to buy one. ☺ (Jenny, repairs on me if my ticket wins. Wish me luck. Wish us all luck)

  206. It will be ok. It’s horrible and it sucks and I’m beyond sorry you have to go through it but it will end. It will be ok.
    Hugs and support and you aren’t alone. And everyone is going to want one of the new shirts.

  207. We have first generation low-flow toilets and they keep overflowing once they are stopped up. Had the upstairs one overflow and leak downstairs to the kitchen. Luckily we caught it before it became a total catastrophe. I truly understand the nightmare. It will be ok. Hang in there! I live in fear of it happening again because my knucklehead husband refuses to replace it. Why??? 🙁

  208. We went through something very similar last year. It sucks. I’d tell even for normal people but I don’t know anyone by that label. But it does get better. Eventually. Promise.

  209. Oh god… Please dont say it happens in threes. I’ve had 2 major floods in 2 years. Another one will legit kill me.

  210. So very sorry. Workmen have been in our house since August and I can completely understand your agony. I’m lucky to work outside the home and try to bolt in the morning before they get there. Meanwhile, we have lost heat (when it was -16F) the gas fireplace should have killed us so we need to replace it, and my husband drained my daughter’s car battery while trying to charge his so they were both stuck without functioning cars. Thankfully the local co-op is 1/4 mile down the road and they delivered and installed two new batteries – the moral being there is always a light at the end of the tunnel 🙂 Anyway, I think we Capricorns must be in some kind of cosmic disaster zone. Maybe our planets will align better soon…I hope!!!

  211. So sorry to hear this. Any type of flooding is shitty, as I’m sure Noah and the unicorns he left behind can tell you. If it’s any consolation,I’ve got the Plague thing under control, so no worries there 😊

  212. When the condensation line on my mother-in-law’s cooler backed up and filled her ceiling, we didn’t find it for MONTHS and only noticed when all the paint in the ceiling was sagging down filled with water not unlike a tarp (who knew paint could stretch like that?). (In her defense, my MIL was nearly blind and just hadn’t noticed it yet….) In order to prevent everything from suddenly slooshing out, we got some buckets and a knife and gingerly poked a hole in it, allowing water to more or less trickle out.

    I sometimes wish my bathtub didn’t have an overflow hole — or, at least, they’d put it somewhat HIGHER in the tub… but I can’t believe those sinks. I’m rather glad we didn’t get one installed when we redid the bathroom.. .

    We love you for turning your tragedies into our morning laughs — you poor thing! Here’s hoping the office is cleared out SOON and all damages restored!

  213. We live in an area with many different micro climates. My parents hired an architect designer who lived where it never froze in the winter, so he put all the pipes to the addition to the house (and my parents master suite) on the roof exposed. Every year, my dad and brother would have to climb up on the roof and insulate the pipes. One year, crazy squirrels chewed up the insulation and we had a really hard freeze on the night before Xmas Eve, when the entire family was coming over. So someone had the great idea that my grandfather, who was handy but elderly, should join my dad & brother on the roof to help fix the problem. It was likely my grandfather’s idea, to be fair, but a stupid one. He slipped, injured his back, they had to get him off the roof safely and in the meantime, no water for the house. Oh and did I mention several of us had the flu? We do laugh now, but it took several years. And lots of drinks! Good luck!

  214. I’m sorry this is happening to you. It will pass and then you’ll have sinks with overflows … Make sure whoever fits your sinks actually plumbs the overflow in though. A not plumbed in overflow has resulted in a flood in our kitchen and is currently accounting for the unholy smell coming from the cupboard under my kitchen sink. So just double check, or make Victor double check. This was supposed to be a comforting and reassuring message of solidarity but it went a little off piste. Sorry about that. I was going to rewrite it but I thought if anybody could understand how these things happen it would be you so here it is.
    Let’s just go with this too shall pass.

  216. We had two flooding disasters in the same year…destroying the same floor twice… I feel your pain…

    I’m sorry you’re going through this…what a freaking nightmare. Water is my single-biggest fear…other than freezing to death like we almost did this morning when the power went out in the middle of the night without so much as a beep out of my home security system…

  218. I have to tell you my flooding story.

    We were moving into a new house in February, it was like 20 degrees during the day. So the water was frozen, we tried turning it on but nothing happened. Since we were still fighting with the propane company, we weren’t living there yet, so we left for the weekend.

    The water main broke open that weekend, flooding the entire basement and most of the yard.

    We refused to actually move in, because the breaker box had gotten soaked too and we didn’t trust the electricity. Huge fight with our landlords, and we never ended up living there. Even with the “lakeside” view.

  219. It IS going to be okay, even if it seems like forever. And don’t try to mitigate on our account – in nearly ANY household there would be crying and screaming and anxiety so HEY! NORMALISH! 🙂 I do hate that this happened to you – you’re handling it much better than many of us especially me. I freeze up into inaction (when once upon a time I thrived under pressure but that was many many many moons ago) and I would bleat like a lamb.
    You are GROWN-UPPING YOUR WAY THROUGH THIS LIKE A FUCKING CHAMP, LADY! <3 Be proud of yourself – I know I certainly am proud of you.

  220. When he was a toddler, my son clogged the upstairs toilet by using an entire roll of toilet paper—and the leak found its way through a recessed light fixture into my kitchen sink directly below. And when I called my husband at work to inform him that we had poopy-water in our kitchen sink and would now have to burn down the house and move, he calmly replied, “Sounds like the toilet needs to be plunged.” REALLY??? YA THINK??? When everyone (but my husband, apparently) knows that the only correct reply was, “I’m on my way.” I was absolutely certain that, assuming we both survived the day, I would never ever be able to eat food out of my kitchen ever again. It turns out hunger is a powerful motivator, especially after the sink and counter had been scrubbed with bleach five times. My point is, you absolutely will laugh about this later. Much much later.

  222. Oh dang, i sympathize with your water issues and floor warpage. That sucks. I can’t help wondering if the universe is trying to tell Victor to stop wearing business suits? Please take a deep breath. maybe a hot cup of something? (or a cold one, i don’t judge.)

  223. Oh god, having strangers in your house IS like living in a bucket of razors. I promise things will get better, it’s all temporary. You still totally rock, Jenny.

  224. Oh, sweet, tormented girl, it is going to be okay! I promise! No one should have to endure three floods at once, though, ironically, my coworker did just stop me in the hall earlier today to tell me about a series of floods that just happened in his home the night before he was leaving for an extended vacation, so apparently these things do happen more often than we think! A pox on whomever it was who turned the water back on and re-flooded your domain! A pox, I say!!! But maybe it’s better that they did so that you aren’t worrying about a third event? Ok, no pox on that person! Cancel the pox!!!

  225. One day a giant hole appeared in my downstairs ceiling. My roof was leaking for years! The attic insulation soaked it up until it was so wet and had rained so much at one time, that it made its way through two floors.

  226. I was pregnant and all the attic stuff was piled in my bedroom. And I kept knocking shit into the crib and I thought I’m gonna kill my baby if we can’t get this stuff out of here. Two houses later. I still get anxiety when it rains.

  227. I can’t make it through all the comments, since I am on my lunch hour, but am skipping to the bottom to send sympathy and support.

  228. It is going to be ok. Really, it will!!
    You can have them gently remove the beautiful sinks and put them in the garden as bird baths? critter drinking bowls?

    I know you may not want another person, but please hire an Independent Insurance Adjuster! They will work with your insurance companys adjuster and contractor to ensure you don’t have to pay out $$$$. Best advice my girlfriend got. Ins co offerred 5k, with the independent adjuster she net 85000 and everything was fixed perfectly. No out of pocket costs.
    Ps. You did great!!! It’s incredibly stressful when things like this hapoen. Seriously, good job!!

  230. I used to be a Homeowner’s Insurance adjuster and boy does this sound familiar!

    This is horrible, I know, but you really will get through this. I’ve walked thousands of people through this and experienced it myself. When it happened to me, I told myself that at least I wasn’t standing in my pajamas watching the last of my house burn down. I’ve been the person on the other end of the line, talking to that person in the pajamas, that had to say, “It’ll be ok” and then wait until I hung up to cry. From the looks of things, there are a lot of people here crying with you! HUGS

    Also, tearing out those sinks yourself would be quite therapeutic…just saying… 🙂

  231. Yes, strangers in the house is horrifying. We just went through it. When I’m going through shit, wet or dry, Bob Marley helps me remember that 🎶Everything is gonna be alright. Everything is gonna be alright.🎶. I recommend his beautiful reminder. Really.
    By the way, you are my favorite writer. 👍

  232. I guess Victor has never had to poke a bubble in the sheetrock to let the water that’s accumulated there flow out? Same principle… 🙂

    IT’S GOING TO GET BETTER, JENNY! (And a happier New Year to you all…)

  233. This all sucks and sounds super-overwhleming. Hang in there and cty as long as you need to. On the new sinks area, maybe there are rooster sinks of some sort you will find. Please don’t get the plague. We love u and need you!

  234. It’s going to be ok Jenny. Everyone still loves you, and everyone is safe. And the lawn gerbils are still outside-as opposed to inside using the sink as a pool.

  235. You need a De-Voodoo-Izer, STAT! It’s probably that neighbor down the street that can’t help herself for being a jealous hag.

    I don’t know for certain that this is the problem but it’s worth a shot. I had a “VooDoo For The Office Kit” once. Until Susan in Accounts Receivable blamed me for the sharp pain in her ass and the boss took the whole kit away. So I bought a book about Witchcraft spells and read it in front of her during lunch breaks.

  236. The contractor should have to stay under that ceiling hole for 24 hours singing “There’s a hole in the bucket” after it’s fixed to guarantee it’s dry…….I’m sorry Jenny, it will be OK, YOU ARE the FORKEN BEST:)

  237. Whether you get flooded with two inches or 10 feet, you’re still flooded. That is reason enough to be upset. If you need it, if it’ll help, I totally give you permission to be upset about this. And if you don’t need permission to be upset, then nerts to me, you do you.

    You’re doing an amazing job of handling this. Yay, you! We’re all proud of you!

  238. Oh what I wouldn’t give to have your rich-girl problems, including a big house and money to fix it. It’s all a matter of perspective. I live in a busted-ass one bedroom apartment and I struggle to make the too-high rent.

  239. I empathize. We have sinks with no overflow hole. Who the Fuck this was a good idea?!? Our back bathroom has a sink notorious for clogging. My mom thought it would be a good idea to let the hot water run and push the clog out. Ya. That doesn’t work. I went running now the hallway screaming how don’t have an overflow hole, only to find the bathroom flooded.

    It gets better. It will get better. Or, it will atleast be replaced with something less watery.

  240. Hang in there. You are awesome! And I cannot believe that a FLOOD repair guy would turn on a leaky sink, that’s SO frustrating. all the hugs
    Have an exorcism JUST IN CASE.
    I’m sending you good vibes for the rest of the year.

  241. I can’t say I’ve ever needed an overflow in the bathroom sink. Who keeps turning them on and walking away?? That is the most mind boggling aspect of this story.

  242. I’m an insurance agent, you may be able to get a hotel room paid by the insurance during construction. Instead of tearing out the sinks, can you replace the faucets so they are not easy enough for the cat to turn on?

  243. I had a meltdown because the light in my dryer blew out. Can’t imagine dealing with the biblical office flooding. Sitting with the borken things for a bit, I begin to see them more as fellow borken travelers in life, inanimate as they may be, and I find I can deal with them a little better that way. It will be ok. Floods come and go but you can persevere. PS— Have you thought about keeping your awesomely lovely sinks and installing a floor surface that slopes slightly to a central drain so any future leaks are contained and drained before maturing into floods? Just an idea…

  244. We once spent New Year’s Eve with Javier the plumbing guy. His wife/girlfriend called him every 15 minutes asking when he would be done. It will be funny, I promise! This is how you get great stories for books, you know, if you wanted like write another fantastic book 🙂

  245. Have to say I’m laughing at the business suit thing … also my autocorrect turned “suit” into “shit.” I may swear too much.

    THIS IS NOT LITTLE STUFF FOR “NORMAL” people. Feeling crazy in the midst of this complete insanity is 100% normal. Promise.

  246. Oy, bringing back unpleasant memories. I had 4 floods in 5 months in my first apartment, including the one caused by the repair guy turning on the wrong thingy (I never got my plumbing degree) immediately after removing all the fans from the previous flood. I then lived for 16 years in fear of the next plumbing incident that came in the form of having to redo all the plumbing in my house. That was a year and a half plus 26 holes in the walls and ceilings ago. The holes have been covered, but I cannot bring myself to paint the walls or redo the ceilings. Fear of intruders trumps the need to live in a civilized looking house. Plus, last year my upstairs sink overflowed into the dining room when I forgot to turn the tap off after discovering the waterlines frozen. The waterfall came through one of the ceiling patches so I figured I’d saved my self some money there.

  247. Had a fancy sink with no overflow. It cracked in a spectacular spiral pattern when the pipes froze, which they did when we were living in another country, living and eating spectacularly wonderful things, which required me to travel back to the borken pipes, which had also spectaculary blown up the claw foot tub shower, and even more spectacularly destroyed the hideous downstairs bathroom, the walls and ceilings of which pulsed and swelled and sprang tiny comical cartoon leaks when the plumber turned the water back on to find the tiny comical cartoon leaks. The new bathrooms are not spectacular, but they are pretty darn good. This is only about half the story. I can’t tell the story about the contractor who had AN ENTIRE YEAR to remodel the bathrooms, but only worked on them in the week before I arrived home, because that makes me want to commit something spectacularly bad on him, while screaming.
    Good luck. It will end. Scream all you want.

  249. If there’s anything I’ve learned from following your blog (and its comments) as well as getting to know the wonderful people who are part of this tribe, it’s that everything will be okay because you’re not alone.

    We’re here for you.

  250. sweet jeebs thats quite a lot to deal with, and it sucks that you have to. but! of course, it will all be ok.

    just a thought about your amazingly beautiful custom made sinks before they’re destroyed…
    could they have custom made beautiful over flow holes put into them? probably not. but worth asking maybe.

  251. It’s going to be okay. And it is more than okay if you want to go hide in a closet. Take a soft blanket and Hunter S. or Dorothy B. or whoever is the best cuddler and DON’T FEEL BAD ABOUT HIDING. I’ve had floods in 3 different houses (earthquake damage, broken fire sprinkler, and defective plumbing part) and it sucked. I hated those fans and having guys in and out but it all turned out okay. And IT WILL BE OKAY at your house, too. And, yes, floods come in threes, so you’re done. Love you, you are kick-ass. Maybe take the cats sink shopping to be sure they can’t turn them on.

  252. Never ask ” can it get any worse?” Because the answer is always, yes, yes it can. My mother always said trouble comes in threes. So hopefully yours is finished now. Just think in a couple months this will all be repaired and you can look back on the last weeks and laugh. And if not I’ve heard those padded rooms are pretty comfy and you don’t have to cook or do laundry! Either way it will get better. Much love to you and yours!

  253. It’s going to be okay. But I feel you on the bucket of razor blades thing. We’re renting and I think my leasing company thinks I enjoy calling them or something. Each time I want to scream, “NO. I DO NOT want strangers all up in my personal space! JUST FIX THE @!(ed @&!(ing house already so that I can STOP calling!” (They never send the same repair person twice. *grumble)

  254. Oh wow, Jenny it’s going to be ok! You face so many things in your life. It is truly amazes me. I wouldn’t know what to do half th. Of the time if I ran into some of your situations. Hugs and stay dry.

  256. It’s going to be ok honest. And just think, new stuff for your next book. Hugs

  258. We live in a very old house, so I’ve been in similar situations many times. In fact two weeks ago our dryer caught fire. I feel your pain. But yes, I’ve always survived, and you will, too. 💜

  260. GO TO A HOTEL. OR RENT A HOUSE. At least escape to one during the day when the people are there. Your sanity and health are most important. You deal with more awful every damn day than most people EVER face. Take care of yourself. You have a legitimate giant shit show occurring. Boring normal people would be freaking out. Victor is a smart guy who can rearrange his schedule to handle all of this. Don’t get all normal on him now — it’ll scare the hell out of him! He’s a great guy. You are a wonderful person. A shit show is a shit show.

  261. It will totally be ok. Eventually. Try imagining, just for a moment, that all of this is already in the past…maybe you’ll feel better for a minute? Also – I made the same type 3 times in a row, in which I typed “fruck” or “frucked” instead of the word I was trying to type – so I have decided that must be MY word for the year. You’re welcome to borrow it any time you want. 🙂

  263. Ouch. I feel your pain. My gutters overflowed and flooded our window wells in the middle of the worst rain my area has had in years. While my husband was out of town and I was home with the kids. So my oldest son and I bailed out the window wells, dug trenches, he emptied the gutters with an old hockey stick, all the while it was raining so hard we could barely see. Then I pulled apart the one room in the basement that got flooded and set up dehumidifiers and fans.
    At 6am the next morning, my niece, who was living in another part of the basement, woke me up to say it too had flooded. Our asshole neighbors stole the downspout extension that moved the water away from that part of the house. 4 hours later, I finally finished the first stages of remediation… And promptly had to go do all the “mom” things that come with having a large family. My children maaaay have learned some inventive new ways to curse people that day.
    Point is, it DOES end. Even though living through it seems interminable, it DOES end.

  264. Not only will it be ok, it will be better. In the meantime, maybe an umbrella would be good.

  265. Everything is going to be okay. Almost everyone would be uncomfortable with all aspects of the situation – each at their own level. You’ll get through it, and it’ll be a distant memory, with a happy ending, in no time.

  267. Flood sisters! My waterfall is in my garage, which seems lucky, but it turns out a rat made a huge litter box (/buffet?) out of several bags of grass seed, etc. right in the same spot and it’s a huge gross mess and I’m most likely contracting the plague (or at the very least hantavirus) as I clean it up. Also, not to compete or anything, but my insurance won’t cover mine because it’s the result of either faulty workmanship or old house. ☹️🐭💦

  269. Feel free to try and sell us something through your blog to mitigate cost… Like boats or waders. Sending warm and dry thoughts your way.

  273. You’ll be fine, just remember to breathe and you’ll be fine.
    Seriously remember to breathe it’s kinda crucial.
    Also hug.
    You’ll be fine.

  274. That is all very uncool. Water damage is like that ridiculous gopher-smashing game at arcades. You never know when it’s going to pop up and it seems to multiply in the shadows. In that vein, have you tried taking a giant mallet to the problem? Con: further damage to the house. Pro: serious emotional release.

  277. Don’t tell Victor, but I laughed at the tarp torrent. I’m sorry. I’m an asshole that way.
    It’s gonna be okay, Jenny. You’re going to be okay.

  278. The bathroom will be better than ever! I had old pipes in my house and mentioned one day that it looked like one was leaking in the basement(there was always a puddle) and when my stepdad came by several weeks later for something else(Mom forgot to mention it to him, sigh…)he said yeah a leak. The plumber was there within days and I had new outtake pipes-because of course it was the main outtake pipe for the sink and shower-and no more leaking in the basement!

  279. {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    Now here are my new sink suggestions:

    Fish in a sink: https://www.oddee.com/wp-content/uploads/_media/imgs/articles2/a96808_a505_acquarium-sink2.jpg

    If the water is going to pour down it should look like it is pouring down: http://www.thedailytop.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/63e4e3b2e3d796e78632beba2925390f.jpg

    Let’s make sure ALL the water ends up on the floor: https://www.oddee.com/wp-content/uploads/imgs/art450x300/96808.jpg

    How about a cat with that?: https://assets.rbl.ms/845279/980x.jpg

    Why, hello, did you lose something down there?: http://ragtagriot.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/crazy-sinks-ragtag-riot-15-260×500.jpg

  280. I feel like the contractor or whoever turned the sink on for Round Two should be responsible for any costs incurred due to the new damage. Because seriously? WTF? Who’s like, “Hey, we’re here because of water damage I KNOW LET’S TURN THE WATER ON!”

    You will be fine. A bit damp, but fine.

  281. I’m so sorry! But here’s a suggestion: Can you merely drill overflow holes in the custom sinks and attach draining tubing or piping? And BTW, kudos to Victor. I don’t know a soul who works at home IN A BUSINESS SUIT.

  282. Wow. I’m still amazed. Sorry. Since Steinbeck and Hemingway died, I’ve been sorta depressed. I like the ‘tone’ and ‘style.’ If that makes any sense, because I know it doesn’t…

  283. Holy Cow! I do think you have hit your limit on water issues for the moment. Glad the last leak happened before you had repairs completed! I’ve had water issues in houses before, but they paled in comparison to the 2 times I’ve found a snake in my house. Take “comfort” in the fact that there’s always something worse than what’s currently happening!

  285. I am so sorry you are going through this, I understand, what you describe would almost kill me…almost…because a part of me would know that this will get better and pass. So, THIS WILL GET BETTER AND PASS, I PROMISE!

  287. If at all possible, look into moving out of your house while the work is being done. We had work done on our house this summer, and we just rented a corporate apartment for the duration. It was only a short drive away, so it was possible to stop by the house every day to check on the work. But it got us (and our pets, who were also distressed by the work and the workmen) out of the day-to-day stress of the disruption. Granted, moving into a furnished apartment is a different kind of disruption, but it was easier to look at it as a sort of vacation.

  288. Oh my, I definitely understand what you are dealing with. I am an expert at having my apartment condo flood. It was filled with 7 FEET of flood water On June 23, 2013. After 1.5 years to get it to the point of my moving back in, some asshole contractor decided that they would pretend there was another leak or flood to attempt to cover up the damage they did to the new floors so they wouldn’t have to pay for it. 2 years from initial flood date, I moved back in to discover that the asshole plumbers didn’t solder a pipe properly and water poured out of my shower wall to soak my hallway. Now, that one wasn’t sooo bad, floors were OK, but then, almost right afterwards, some loser in my building flooded their bathroom, but I never realized until waaay too late and now there is water damage in my spare bedroom. So ya, flooding can come in 3s, or 4s, and probably more.
    I feel for you. Water sucks. I have probably got flood related ptsd as every time it rains and every year during the spring thaw, I get really anxious and crabby worrying about the next big flood.

  289. I feel for you. Our basement bathroom is borken and possibly cursed. This bathroom has experienced: magic flying citronella ants which appear out of thin air (no exterminator was able to find their origin), poop coming up from the shower drain, a toilet that flushes continuously forever, and most recently a dead animal that we cannot find but stinks to high heaven. Someone suggested that I “smudge” the bathroom/house by burning white sage in a ritualistic fashion which I did because I figured at best I will rid this bathroom of the 7 plagues and at worst set the house on fire which would probably eliminate the dead animal stank. It still smells. But for a day or two it smelled like burned sage which is not altogether bad so that was ok.

  290. Yes, this is a “first-world” problems and yes there are people with much bigger problems but these are your problems so I totally get how horrible it is. And I also hate having repair people in my home, my sanctuary, my safe place, so I also totally get how agonizing that is. Deep breaths, hang in there, and remember we are all broken! Some of us are just better at it.

  291. I absolutely typed ‘borken’ – come on auto correct don’t mess with me

  295. We had an upstairs toilet overflow and cause a leak into our living room. It wasn’t enough to file an insurance claim, we tore out the soggy sheetrock in the ceiling and hubby is skilled enough to fix the leak (the fill valve in the clean water tank was set too high). We were saving to have the ceiling fixed and a friend comes over with her new boyfriend. He asks about the hole in the ceiling, and without missing a beat she tells him we’re installing a skylight. Ten mins later he asks, isn’t there a second floor above here? So now we laugh about the first floor skylight.

  296. You’re right. And I feel confident that I am right about you not contracting the plague. Plagues are so seven centuries ago. Good luck with the restoration and repairs. Little is more disquieting than random people tearing up and through your home, but you can do this.

  297. Omg, I totally understand the strangers in my house anxiety. We once had a refrigerator repair guy who I swear would not leave (not really, it just felt like that to me) and I just laid on the stairs in the dark until he left and yes it was weird but I didn’t know where else to hide until he was ready for me to let him out. Like if I sit on the couch he can see me from the kitchen but apparently I need to collapse someplace nearby but within earshot? I am not equipped for adulting sometimes.

  298. Hang in there, Jenny. Look at it this way: you’ve made it this far! Also, your family is healthy and the odds of getting the plague are borkingly small.

  299. 1) It will be ok, I promise
    2) I am “new” and had hoped to send you a long winded email about how wonderful you are and how glad I am to have found you, but I can’t seem to find an email, so I’m leaving it in a comment to bore others. Thank you for your take on the world and for your openness in sharing your struggles. Thank you for having all of your blog posts archived so that I could go back to the very beginning and read them (yes, really). And thank you for creating a community where it is safe to have struggles and to cry about them and laugh about them and know that you are not alone. I am so so fortunate that I have relatively mild anxiety, but when things are shitty, it is nice to have a place to call home where everyone understands.
    3) It will all be ok…just in case you forgot while reading #2. Hugs!

  300. Instead of destroying that non-overflow owning sink, can you sell it? Maybe because it’s yours, a famous author, it will go for a fortune and you can pay for your reno!

  301. Try to keep remembering you have your beautiful daughter, your wonderful husband, your cats and dog, and that however hard it is that your possessions are giving you so much trouble, they are just possessions. What’s important will be here to support you. As will all of us. Virtual hugs!!

  302. Dealt with overflow sink this week. It has overflow holes but a slow drain and so apparently I should have monitored it when I was dripping the pipes to prevent them from freezing and exploding and getting water in the house. So I can say I did New Year’s cleaning because I did. I had to clean out 20 years’ of accumulated bathroom under-the-sink and in the drawer detritus. It looks lovely now. Not touching it again til I’m 70.

  303. If all of these things were happening to me I would find it to be a big fat hairy deal. Also, a long time I ago I realized this, which maybe most people realize when they are kids. Whatever, here it is: It doesn’t matter how your biggest problem compares to my biggest problem, or anyone else’s big problem. Your biggest problem is still your biggest problem, and it’s stressful. I came to this conclusion when I was poor and I was stuck in a place where a group of us had to listen to this rich lady complain that none of us understood how difficult her life was because she was losing her nanny – this nanny was the best nanny in all of human history and losing her was ruining life for her whole family – she did not know how they could go on. At first I was angry. How dare she be so callous that she didn’t realize the rest of us couldn’t even afford a date night twice a year or a babysitter, and she’s crying about needing to replace a nanny? But after really listening to her for a while I heard her fear. I started to feel true empathy for her because she was just like me – scared and worried and overwhelmed.

    Anyway, your fears are no less real than anyone else’s.

    It will be okay. The house will get all fixed up and you can turn off the water under the sink so that people and/or cats don’t go flooding your house like it’s the in thing to do.

    XOXO

  304. I have maintained for a long time that the calculus of comparative suffering is often the beginning of real evil. Don’t diminish your problems just because they seem smaller than those you imagine (or know) others have. This crap is happening to you. It’s personal and you have every right to take it that way.

    I recommend shaking your fist at the sky, yelling at the ceiling, and cussing up a storm. The beating of an insurance adjuster may justifiably be fantasized about.

    But I also notice that you already are admitting that you’ll probably laugh at this someday, maybe. I admire that quality in you. You are pretty freakin’ amazing.

  305. Years ago I had a pipe burst upstairs and flood through my plaster ceiling, warp my hardwoods and leave a huge hole in the ceiling. We had just moved in the house a month earlier. My kids were 2 and 6 months. The week before I had fallen on the stairs and broken my ankle followed by surgery and 6 screws through a metal plate installed. The kids had hand,foot, mouth virus. And my parents had to move in. Yay. A few months later, a man came to grind down a stump in the front yard, hit a water line and flooded the front yard. It was a borken year. But I did live to tell about it. Hang in there!

  307. Just don’t say “It can’t get any worse” because then after your mother dies you’ll come downstairs to her basement on the last night in her house after packing it up and it will be flooded with sewer water from a collapse sewer pipe…not covered by insurance. I’m sorry, that’s the best I can do. Also, it’s shitty compared to nothing. Don’t compare bad stuff to other bad stuff. It’s all bad.

  308. Reading this as I prepare to meet with my landlord to discuss the water leak in our kitchen and how now our kitchen and laundry room have to be completely demo’d to fix some shoddy pipes in between our ceiling and our upstairs’ neighbor’s floor and we won’t be able to use either room for they think 3-5 days while they do repairs but really it may be longer because doesn’t it ALWAYS take longer than they say it will? And my cats and husband and I are going to either have to live in the construction zone or maybe in a hotel and three cats in a hotel is going to be MADNESS I tell you and help me I just want to live in a nice cozy little home where water does not come out of my ceiling.

  309. On New Year’s Day about 5 years ago I sat quietly in my home. I got up to go to the kitchen only to be met with a growing pool of water coming out of the laundry room. I thought at first that one of the washer hoses had let go. I was wrong. I stepped out of the laundry room into my garage only to find 2 or 3 inches of water in there. It turns out that a pipe to my water heater had split open and water was running back into the house. It was after midnight before I could get someone to come to start cleaning up the mess. There were workers in my house until after 4 in the morning and no hot water in the house. The restoration people left large fans, blowing on things trying to dry them off. Those fans had to run day and night for 2 weeks. It was like living in a jet engine. To make a long story short I ended up having to replace all the flooring in my home and the bottom half of many of the walls. Then was all the reconstruction. I can really empathize with you. All of this and it only took about $40,000 to put it all back in order. All this being said… everything ended up being all right. So, Jen… IT WILL BE ALRIGHT!

  310. Hi there! Master plumber here. Your sink is almost guaranteed to be fixable. I’ve only not fixed them when it will cost more to fix than replace, or when the customer just wants a new one. The thousands you mentioned for a new sink should get you almost any faucet and sink you could want, though. May I ask what kind it is/what it looks like? I don’t mean to intrude, but you have piqued my curiosity!

    (These are the offenders. https://twitter.com/TheBloggess/status/948605199949729792 And we need to change the handles because the cats can easily turn them on, but it looks complicated since they float in the mirror. The contractor said he thinks he can rebuild the bottoms that were ripped out of the cabinets so at least we won’t have to get rid of the cabinets. ~ Jenny)

  312. I’m sorry is it wrong to laugh? After learning the word borken this week (and I am totally going to use it – a lot!!) then picturing you and Victor taking down the tarp and getting soaked makes my problems seem small — I love you for making me feel that way!

  313. Is it wrong to laugh? Learning the word borken this week (I am totally going to use that word – a lot!) and picturing you saying “What could go wrong?” makes my problems seem insignificant. And I love you for that!

  314. We had a flood once in our place. It sucked, but it gets better. You will be ok. Sending positive energy your way.

  315. It’s almost as if someone with tiny, plushy feet were to stand in the bowl of the sink, pushing the stopper down. And then turning on the tap, taking dainty licks from the water. And then removing their feet and shaking the water off as it continues to fill. And leaving the room with a contented twitch of the tail.
    I think you see where I am heading with this.

    IT’S THAT EFFING SQUIRREL FROM LAST SUMMER. We never heard the end of that story and now I know why. The little demon moved in!
    __
    Do check Craigslist for construction ads (run an ad yourself?) and look up a nearby Habitat for Humanity Restore. Like other retailers, Hardware stores off-load closeout stock once they only have one or two in inventory. You are highly likely to find something new-in-box that will save you a ton of money.
    Your contractors may also know of unused new stock from another job that’s isn’t getting installed for one reason or another.

  317. Lordt. All of this entirely sucks. Question-there’s no way to artfully create overflow holes in the beautiful sinks? Also, ❤️🍸💪🤬

  318. Oh,Jenny. I feel your pain. Our laundry room has flooded due to a stupid drain issue and it destroyed our library ceiling tiles downstairs. I take Xanax on laundry day due to anxiety I have every time I have to do a load of skivvies.

  320. I’m sending all the hugs and positive vibes and laughter and love and everything else I can possibly send. PLEASE let this nightmare end already, Universe! Enough is enough!

    Also, the t-shirt is awesome but also very “They’re good dogs, Brent”… if ya know what I mean.

  321. It will all be fine…and I’m sure you will absolutely laugh at this one day. I can barely get through a surprise visit from someone I actually LIKE, let alone a parade of strangers who get to witness my undoing. You need a hug and a fluffy terrycloth robe the size of a clubhouse to go hide out in for a spell.

  322. I’m just going to send you the makings of an amazing blanket fort. You can live there until it’s safe to people again.

  324. “You have reached the Lawson residence. We are currently borken. Please leave a message.”

    I’m pretty sure that if Victor hadn’t pitched such a fit about you buying towels all those years ago none of this would have happened. Or at least you would have had more towels to sop up all that water.
    But then you wouldn’t have Beyonce.
    And your work might not be as well known (although I know that would have happened eventually no matter what because DESTINY!!)

  326. One of my least favorite things in the world is having work people in my house. Even if they’re only coming to do an estimate. Get. Out. I so get it. I’m so sorry about the torrential indoor rain. And it will get better. Hugs…

  327. It’s ok to feel bad. Plumbing disasters are shitty and your home is your refuge. One of the things I’m trying to do for myself is not feeling guilty for feeling bad when shitty things happen just because someone else might have it shittier. Thank god, this is not a contest. May your river of suck stop flowing soon. Hugs.

  328. We were flooded by an upstairs neighbor and went through the whole deal with servpro and loud fans and strangers everywhere, pulling drywall out like mud. But afterwards, it was just like the ads say. The room looked like it had never happened. If you’re going to have strangers in your house, these are the kind you want. And it all started when I noticed a little bubble in the closet ceiling and thought, huh, that looks weird, i should put a pin in that and see what happens. In my defense, the guys said if I hadn’t done that, it would have kept building up in the ceiling until it poured out in every room, so you and victor absolutely did the right thing.

  329. It’s going to be okay big hug
    And it’s okay to be stressed and overwhelmed and feel shitty about it. Comparing problems makes no sense. Someone will always have it better, and someone will always have it worse. There’s no reason to belittle your own stress or worry because someone else has the plague. Same as there’s no reason to belittle someone else’s stress or worry because you think your problem is bigger/worse. You have a right to have your feelings. It’s stressful and a lot to take on at a time of year that is already stressful with the impossible expectation of making everything perfect for Christmas. It is going to be okay.

  330. OMG. It’s ok. It will be. We literally had three plumbing disasters in the last two weeks and I’m not sure they are over. Hang in there!

  331. Please accept a hug (imaginary of course) where ever you are at the moment. Victor and your daughter should each give you a real one. I don’t know anyone who would be okay after their house messes with them. I hope it can all be resolved with a minimum of trauma.

  332. Hugs! I know what it’s like to love a nice fixture ( as you love your sink). Maybe retrofit the sink with an overflow drain? I googled it, it’s a thing! Hang in there- all the good vibes coming your way!

  333. It’s okay. This is me holding your hand long distance. It’s all okay. I know it’s a mess right now, but it’s all okay. You are loved, and you have saved me before, with those same words. It’s okay.

  334. I have been an insurance adjuster for 25+ years. If your state has them contact a public adjuster. They charge up to 10% but they will fight and get what you are entitled too.
    Rick Morris rwmorrisinsclaims@yahoo. Com.

  335. Our house here in Austin flooded from a defective moisture pump in HVAC unit. Had to have
    hardwood floors replaced. I can recommend a couple of very competent floor installers
    that are not very chatty. Also, if it’s necessary to have strange guys tromping through your
    house, it helps that these guys are so muscular that watching them is like being at a bar
    with male strippers, so you could just mix yourself a cocktail and enjoy the men at work
    revue.

  337. hugs I hope water stops finding ways to rain down on you all! I have my own version of “What could possibly go wrong…” except mine is “The only way this could get any worse is if…” It also involves water. Maybe it’ll give you a laugh. 🙂

    I went on a tubing trip with a bunch of strangers from a Meetup group on a river in Colorado at the beginning of June one year… If you know Colorado weather, you know this was short sighted. Pretty much everything went wrong on that trip, but long story short, we got out on the river too late in the day, it became windy and started pouring rain, to the point that we had to get off the river. Everyone was shivering, looking like they were about to get hypothermia in their bathing suits with the rain pelting us. We ended up having to hitchhike back to our cars on the back of some random guy’s truck. After we all got into the truck bed, I started laughing at the absurdity, and I said out loud: “The only way this could get any worse is if it starts hailing.” A few minutes after I said that, it started hailing, and I tried hiding underneath my giant tube as the rest of the group glared at me and we were being pelted with smallish hail.

    Several months later I was out with a different group of people, and I overheard someone telling the story of the disastrous tubing trip, which they topped off by saying: “And then SOMEONE said, the only way this could get any worse is if it starts hailing. AND THEN IT STARTED HAILING!” I jumped in and said, “Yeaaaaah, that was me…” And they formed the sign of the cross with their fingers and rightfully treated me like a vampire… Because I can apparently summon hail from the sky. (Or, I’m from Texas and know that green clouds mean either hail or a tornado.)

  339. I loved the “It’s borken, Victor” shirt so I bought it. Despite the fact that when I get it and wear it there is not a single person I know in real life who will understand it. And when I try to explain it, they will think I am insane. Which is actually a selling point for the shirt.

  340. I have the plague. Would you like to share? I actually have the virus that causes Croup but I can’t SAY I have Croup because apparently babies and toddlers have claimed that particular name for when THEY get sick so I’m not allowed to use it. I must say I have “Influenza Z” which is one of the 400 viruses this year (literally! 400!) that did not make it into the Flu shot and I’m really pissed off that these babies get to keep their special disease name since I don’t own any creepy little people but became suspiciously ill after attending a Petrie Dish Party – aka my neice’s 3rd Birthday. But none of those little germ-inhabitants have become reportedly ill so why the fuck can’t I just say I have the fucking Croup? I love you Jenny cuz I can vent with you. So seriously – do you wanna have a play date with me and share my non-Croup? I’m getting very lonely and Cabin-Croup-Fevered because my husband moved out of the bedroom (PERK!!) and keeps spraying Lysol at me. Damn. This little rant feels better already. Thanks Jenny!

  342. I’m so sorry but you made it sound so funny and it isn’t but I’m laughing and crying for you right now!I hope everything gets fixed soon!

  343. Google offered your post to me today, I’ve never been on your blog before. Apparently Google is stalking me and knows I’m currently reading one of your books I got for Christmas from my husband (yeah, he’s awesome. And now I get to tell him he’s helping fix your house by buying me your book I hope. So now he’s extra awesome.).
    I’m so sorry for your house woes. I’m ridiculously allergic to synthetic fragrances, so whenever a repair guy comes in our house I have to go hide from the strong dryer sheet or cologne smell that all repair guys seem to bathe in. I can relate to wanting to hide from them and it all to just be over.
    We having a running joke with my parents that whenever I house sit for them, something goes terribly wrong. When I was a teenager they went on a Caribbean vacation. I woke up to water pouring through the kitchen and dining room ceilings. The solid pine dining room floor looking like rolling waves already. I had to call a neighbor and two relatives just to find the water turn off valve. Thank heavens my uncle was there when my parents finally called and could help calm them down. I think my saying something about water running off the light fixtures may have been a bad idea. Apparently the upstairs toilet tank had broken in the middle of the night. Four months later the new floor is in and the finish is on… and a workman breaks the line to the icemaker on the back of the refrigerator as he’s leaving and repeats all of the downstairs damage to hundreds of square feet of new solid pine flooring.
    Contractors have insurance and bonds for situations like this. If one of those bozos is the cause of the water being on again,  they can be held accountable.
    Hang in there. Build yourself a safe spot. And replace the fancy sinks. I know it’s painful to remove a beautiful home piece, but if you install something with overflow drains the paranoia of the water being on in that bathroom won’t keep you up at night.

  344. Don’t forget … your problems are real for you and that makes them important! It’s not a race to see who has the biggest troubles. Take care of yourself and just remember to stay compassionate to others (like you are). I am sorry for your troubles and hope they will be resolved quickly! Peace.

  345. I feel ya hon. We had a house fire and were forced to live in a motel in our rural area for 10 months with 4 children. I’m still scarred.
    As long as everything is borken, can we have a funeral for the sinks? Memorial photos? A demolition party? They are giving up their custom lives so you can live water, tarp, mold and work people free. They deserve something.
    Air hugs!!

  346. Girl-
    There is not enough Valium in the world for me to believe I could survive what you are handling with supreme grace. I am still experiencing anxiety because people moved everything around in my classroom over Christmas break and I am still coming up with missing items. It’s an invasion of my space, but nothing compared to your situation. ANYONE would be upset by this and no, it’s not a little thing.

  347. This is why contractors are bonded and insured. This part of it is on them.

  348. Oh sweetheart sometimes you can’t help but believe there is a God and they are out to get you 🙁 but you’ll be ok, you’re still here so you’ve beaten this kind of stuff before, and you’re not in Yemen watching your children die of cholera. Harsh but true… Love ya though

  349. I hate plumbing issues. Every single major fight my husband and I have had, involved plumbing or specifically, DIY plumbing projects. Just thinking about needing to replace two sinks makes me want to scream. GAH!

  350. I was trying to cover up a hole in the ceiling that was leaking and had to pull down a piece of cardboard that had been put there before, when all of a sudden I was hit in the face by really cold water.
    It was very cold outside and the rain was so cold it took my breath away. Couldn’t even talk. Had to laugh later when I realized that there had been a big bubble in the cardboard and I moved it anyway.

  351. Fancy ass custom sinks that ruin your house ain’t so fancy 😉 Thousands of dollars to not live in a swimming pool is going to be so worth it. But living in a pool sounds fun, and sounds like you have the option open. After the sucks are over, and you drain your non-traditional pool house, it’ll be great!

  352. This past semester (I’m a teacher so I think in semester) I broke my foot twice (the second time was one week after the first one healed. Got in an accident with the KNee scooter I was using because of broken foot (literally flew over the handle bars) had a cold that lasted 3 weeks. Had to get all new tires and a new car battery. And when I said I cannot take it anymore, got in a car accident! None of this was tragic but the pile up was overwhelming. 2018 is going to be better. It is. For both if us!

  353. Oh my goodness! It will be ok! These things happen we fix them and move on. I’m sorry it pegs all your anxieties but glad it’s getting handled. I feel you though, the apartment front office asked us to drip all our faucets and disconnect our washer during this freeze. When my husband pulled the washer forward he discovered one of the hoses has been leaking for who knows how long. Floor, floorboard, and wall all squishy and warped 😞

  355. I think you have the right to feel whatever you’re feeling without comparing yourself to what others have or may be going through. ESPECIALLY if you have an office vagina.

  356. My new year has started out with a lost bank card (that I had to cancel and I still don’t have my new one), a furnace that stopped working in sub zero temps and had to be completely replaced, and now my car wouldn’t start this morning and it’s probably the alternator. I’m borken with you and it sucks and I just want to crawl in a hole until 2019 gets here.

  357. My new year has started out with a lost bank card (that I had to cancel and I still don’t have my new one), a furnace that stopped working in sub zero temps and had to be completely replaced, and now my car wouldn’t start this morning and it’s probably the alternator. I’m borken with you and it sucks and I just want to crawl in a hole until 2019 gets here.

  358. Just FYI, this is NOT SMALL. This is BIG. It is big and hard. It would be big and hard for anyone. This is crazy stressful even for the sane, even-keeled people I’ve been told exist somewhere. Validate yo’ stress, girl!

  360. Wait…why is Victor wearing a business suit if he is on a conference call? Or does he just wear the shirt, tie and suit coat and is in his underwear from the waist down?

    (Skype calls. Pantsless, like Winnie the Pooh. Actually, he wears jeans but the idea of him being pantsless seems hilarious. ~ Jenny)

  361. Last year I was dropping off my children at my parent’s house so I could have a date night with my husband. As they’re walking down the stairs to the basement, my youngest (4yrs) says something about her feet being wet. So I walk down and see that their downstairs toilet has over flowed and flooded the basement. I go into “good daughter mode” and start grabbing towels and whatnot to start cleaning it all up. And after an hour or so, it’s done so I send my Mom to go pick up lunch while I throw the towels into the washing machine as I mop thinking it was all over……it was NOT. While I’m mopping, the washing machine empties and starts to flood the basement bathroom ALL OVER AGAIN but this time it’s not just an inch of water, it’s buckets and buckets of it flooding up from the toilet. In horror, I yell to my oldest (14 yrs old) to turn off the washing machine but since she a teenager, she had no idea how to turn it off. So I go running up the stairs in my soaked socks to turn it off. I try to find more towels but they’re all in the washing machine! So I go get the wet/dry vac and start sucking up the huge amounts of water but what I didn’t know is that out the exhaust vent dirty water was shooting out on to the wall. It looked like someone had a serious case of explosive diarrhea all over my Mother’s pristine white walls! It seriously took 5 years off my life when I turned around and saw the damage. Thankfully I was able to wipe all traces off the wall with clorox wipes before my Mom saw it or else she probably wouldn’t talk to me to this day. I still have nightmares about it.

    (On a good note, their insurance replaced everything. Even their towels. I guess toilet water is serious business)

  362. With all the water overflowing everywhere in your house, I keep wondering: Does Victor still think you have enough towels? It sounds like you might need to grab a girlfriend and go shopping.

  363. Aw hell, Jenny. I’m so sorry. I’m going through some absolutely crazy shit too right now (which seems to just keep piling on, as opposed to getting better) and have been having mad anxiety over it. I know how you feel. I’m struggling too. HUGS.

  364. I’m not sure the closet is hidden enough. You need a secret LAIR. That’s where I always dream of hiding. In my secret lair that is wall to wall books with a giant fluffy couch in the middle. And only I can get in. Obviously. NSA would not be able to find this secret lair.
    Cats probably could, but that’s just because cats have magical finding abilities.
    So. Do you have a new cat now that the strangers let one in? Or did you have to give it back to the original caretakers?

  365. This too, shall pass 🙂
    We were doing renovations and had the plastic up with a big slit down the center. So my husband nicknamed it the “whale’s vagina,” which somehow made it easier to deal with lol

  366. Flooding and ceiling leaks are a major fear of mine. Like, stark phobia, can’t handle. (Stems from a flooding incident when I was a kid when all the ceilings in our house caved in due to a bad rainstorm when the roof was being replaced, and that’s when my mom’s heart problems started.) So personally I think what you are going through is pretty damned horrible and your feelings are legit. And those sinks may be pretty, but screw them, your peace of mind is more important.

  368. Maybe it isn’t the sinks as much as the handles. If Ferris Mewler walks under it and arches his back, would pushing the handle up turn it on?

  369. I am so sorry that this is happening to you. It IS a big deal, and it IS normal to feel sorry for yourself. Your home is your sanctuary from the world, and it got borken and trampled on by strangers. That is very traumatic! But, even though it’s hard to remember, everything is impermanent and this too shall pass. Cliche but true. Lean on your tribe and you will get through this. You are so strong and are used to going through so much – you’ve got the experience to persevere. Deep breath – go hide in a blanket fort for a while and come out when you’re ready.

  370. Hopefully bad luck is done with you and the rest of the year will be absolutely wonderful..

  372. It’s true, bad things happen in threes! I had about 6 bad things happen in the fall so I doubled down and figure I’m set for awhile! If I can survive that, you can totally survive this…you got this!

  374. Sell t-shirts as a fundraiser for your deductible that say stuff like “I survived the Bloggess flood of 2018” or “The Bloggess is borked and all I got was this stupid t-shirt”

  375. ‘Everything’s gonna be alright’ my dear.
    I started this year with a knee that suddenly does not hold up the rest of my body (no small feat in itself) and causes me a great deal of pain. I think the universe is telling me to take lots of days off work and consume the rest of my, now deceased, mother’s pain killers, while I binge watch ‘This is Us’.
    Happy New Year to you and yours

  376. Wow – sorry all that is piling on this way. While it’s true that this too shall pass, sometimes it really, really sucks while it’s deciding to do so … Is it any comfort to think about what a great sequence of scenes this will make in your movie someday?

  377. water damage sucks, but it is fixable. Stupid old sinks with no overflow might look pretty but are an accident waiting to happen. It’s going to be OK.

  378. RE: “PPS. I made Victor get up on a ladder and pull down the tarp on my ceiling so that the water could escape but he didn’t want to because he was afraid we’d do more damage but I insisted and I was like, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? and then when he untaped it a torrent of water hit him right in the face and soaked his business suit and…”

    I hope this makes you feel better: if Victor doesn’t know better by now what can be done?

  379. About a week after we moved into our new house four years ago the kitchen sink started leaking water all over the place every time we ran the disposal. We had that fixed then a week later the master shower started leaking into the can light in the kitchen below. We had that fixed only a week later it started leaking again. So they thought they really fixed it this third time only a week after that it leaked again. Finally, we pulled the whole damn shower out and built a brand new one. Also, consistently about once a month our dishwasher leaks while running. Then it’s fine for a month. Then it leaks again.

    Basically every time I turn the water on in our house I’m afraid to breathe lest water come out of somewhere it’s not supposed to.

    In other words…I feel your pain.

  380. We once rented a house with those bowl sinks that sit on the countertop. They leaked. I hated them so much. I had to have the plumber come out several times to fix the various leaks. I vowed then and there I would never buy a house with the damned things. Rip them out and get regular undermount or drop in sinks.

    How did the sink overflow to begin with? Did someone close the drain stopper thing?

    (First time Hailey left it on and it has a very slow drain. Second time I suspect it was the cat. ~ Jenny)

  381. I googled Gallbladder surgery and your blog from July 3, 2013 popped up but it only talks about you having surgery a week from that day. I have gallstones and will eventually need surgery. I would love to know how your experience went and what I can expect. Please.

    (If you go to my July archives you can find all the follow-up posts. Good luck! It’s not fun but it’s not the end of the world. I had some complications so my procedure and recovery was a bit harder than normal. ~ Jenny)

  382. We had something similar happen early in our marriage. Except, I made the mistake of sticking a big knife into the “bubble” in the ceiling. Almost 40 years later and we’re still alive, so I guess it all becomes water under the bridge (or the suit and shirt and all the clothing) eventually.

  383. I had a water heater blow up in my house and cause two inches of flooding on the first floor. What is even happenin?! Also, I initially typed ‘eater’ heater instead of the ‘water’ heater, which would probably mean a microwave? And now I’m wondering which would be worse.

  384. Oh, sweetie…hugs if you want them First, turn those damn sinks into planters–yes, they’re beautiful, but they’re going to keep doing this; find something equally pretty w/an overflow hole, and you’ll sleep much better, not to mention the floor might not squish as much. Secondly, the verb “to bork” has been around at least as long as the late jurist’s attempt to get onto the Supreme Court; hell, it probably owes its existence to the Muppet Show’s Swedish Chef cheerfully carolling “Bork bork bork!” during every damn appearance, so if anyone gives you crap for using it, send ’em to me and I’ll tell ’em to go fuck themselves (the Scots/Irish in me is coming out, apparently). Finally, we here in the Boston area are up to our asses in snow, with some people on the coast dealing with major flooding as well, including huge ice chunks coming over the sea walls. (Why the hell does anybody even live in Scituate, anyway? This shit always happens to them, every damn year!) Anyway, there has to be a network with the most clueless live reporters–I’ll let you guess which one it is–and one of them is singlehandedly responsible for the National Weather Service having to issue this warning, and no, I’m NOT making this up: https://www.boston.com/news/weather/2018/01/04/the-national-weather-service-icebergs-storm (Hey, idiots: This ain’t Titanic; you ain’t Kate and Leo, and MEMA’s gonna be wicked pissed if they gotta get your stupid ass outta the harbor! Jeez…) Anyway, hang in there, OK? At least you’re not a Fox reporter (oops…) having a “Titanic moment”…

  385. Oh no! sounds like you need your own tree-house in the back yard to escape, hope you find treasure in the walls or floors at least.

  387. I am so sorry. I know just how you feel. 4 days before my daughter was born, a pipe burst in my house. I came home to 3 inches of water flooding the first floor. We had people iny house, tearing up the whole first floor for the first 3 weeks of my daughters life. It sucks. I’m sorry.

  388. Well, this is certainly worse than my the hole in the wall story. A plumber made a hole in the wall of my unit and fixed a broken drain pipe that serviced the unit above me. Water from the broken pipe caused the unit below mine to flood.

    At least it was taken care of by the condo association. Apparently, the space in between the walls is considered limited public space and any damaged caused by drain pipes their responsibility.

  390. Check out Phoebe Rudimuno’s photography….I say seal the house up and swim, swim, swim! At least you’d never have to open the front door again….and if you did, there’d be no stranger/salesman still standing.

  392. Damn this whole situation sucks – but can you sell those fancy schmancey custom sinks to some unknowing victim?

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  395. I’m thinking that all of your bad luck for the year is being used right now, leaving the rest of the year open for a cascade of wonderful things.

    Or you pissed off a ghost or something. One of those two.

  396. No offense, but you DO know this is a first-world problem, right? You have insurance, and a place to stay if it gets too bad. I understand this is horrible x 100 compared to a typical person, but still…first world problem.

  397. My house took a lot of water damage in the New England ice dam storms of 2015, and it took nearly a year to get it all repaired. This is probably going to continue to be traumatic for a while, and every little dripping noise will make you anxious. But, eventually everything will be fixed, some things might even be fixed better than before, and all will return to normal. (also, if the damaged floorboards aren’t too large an area? They may eventually go back to normal on their own. Ours did, I couldn’t face having the floors torn up and decided I’d live with slightly warped floors and my fears were rewarded by the floors getting better on their own 😉 )

  398. You are right.
    Everything is going to be okay.
    It is okay to hide in the closet if it makes you feel better. I have had some wonderful closets over the years that served as my refuge.
    ❤❤❤

  400. It will be alright- but it might suck more first. But then it will be alright. It’s already funny, in a laughing at Boggarts until they die sort of way. Hang in there!

  401. Silver lining? My friend’s kid used to flush an entire roll of toilet paper down the toilet making the whole downstairs flood. Since you can’t be in the house when wood floors are refinished the insurance company paid for a hotel and they used the funds for a hotel in vacation since the insurance company didn’t care where the hotel was located. Maybe it’s time for a getaway?

  402. Call the White House, there’s a genius there who can tell you exactly how Nixon era plumbers worked.

  405. Keep the fancy-schancy sinks and replace the faucets with faucets that turn themselves off, as you sometimes see in bathrooms in public places (because the public can be stupid and turn faucets on, then walk away while the water is still running.)

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  408. Are you sure you cannot add an overflow to the current sinks? If not maybe sell them to help pay for the deductible. Construction is the worst. Recently a friend just moved into a hotel until it was done. I do not envy you this.

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