I just want someone to tell me I’m okay.

in If I was a dog I'd be dead by now, Random Crap

So a few weeks ago I found a lump in my neck.  I ignored it because that’s what I do but it’s gotten worse and now I can feel it when I swallow and when I breathe.  I wake up coughing and choking.  It doesn’t hurt.  It’s just really uncomfortable.  Like being lightly strangled by your imaginary friend.  And the anxiety of feeling unable to breathe makes my throat constrict, which makes it worse and that’s about the time I convince myself that my entire body is made of cancer.

It’s probably not though.

I saw my doctor and hoped she’d just say it was all in my head but turns out it’s all in my neck and she took so much blood that the tubes literally stopped filling up, which the nurse said was just a strange problem with the tubes but which I’m pretty sure is a sign that I’m now a solid.  Today I have an ultrasound to look at my neck growth and honestly I’m a little nervous and I’d like for someone to tell me that I’m going to be fine.

Chances are that it’s my thyroid becoming extremely enlarged, which makes sense because I also have Hashimoto’s Disease and that causes a lot of weird problems.  It happened once 15 years ago (on a much smaller scale) and I had to go through a lot of biopsies and ultrasounds before they were able to tell it wasn’t cancer.  The process was grueling but it all worked out so I’m crossing my fingers that this will all work out too, but even if it’s just an enlarged thyroid it’s a concern that it’s pressing on my windpipe so they may have to remove it, or part of it, I guess?  And that seems scary again.

So I guess what I’m asking is three things:

  1. Send me good thoughts if you have them to spare.
  2. Tell me I’m a hypochondriac and this is all very normal and that I’m being a grown-up by checking this out.
  3. Tell me if you’ve had your thyroid removed.  Was it terrible?

Sorry this isn’t a funny post.  I’m just super distracted and I can’t not think about it because breathing and swallowing are two of my favorite things and my neck is being a real dick about it.

784 thoughts on “I just want someone to tell me I’m okay.”

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I’m sending you lots of good thoughts and hope you’ll be ok soon 🙂
    You are being incredibly grown up and responsible and people should follow your example

    hugs

  2. I am thinking all of the good thoughts your way. I am so sorry that your health is so tenuous. You bring so much happiness to so many people, it just seems wrong that your life is such a struggle.

  4. The plus side of getting your thyroid removed is you take synthetic thyroid which means if you eat a whole lot of food you can just take extra and make it go away. The doctors say you shouldn’t do that, but why would you NOT? Anyway, I know a number of people on synthroid and it isn’t a big deal at all.

    Keep on keepin’ on!

  5.         My mom had half her thyroid removed almost 20years ago. Shes the healthiest person I know! I'm sure you'll be fine. If they do have to remove some of your thyroid maybe you can keep it in a jar?!

    (Ooh, thyroid in a jar! Honestly, that would be the silver lining in all of this. ~ Jenny)

  6. Good thoughts headed your way, and I congratulate you on being an adult and getting this checked out. My Mother had her thyroid removed in her forties and lived to be 96! I was going to say take a deep breath, sorry, but you are going to be JUST FINE.

  7. While it’s not normal, you are being very adult by having it checked out. I have responded to the tweet about this post with a pic of my nephew at his first Santa visit. Check it out and try to smile.

  9. I can’t promise that is all going to be ok, but I can remind you to breathe and that you are being very responsible by dealing with this. I’m sending you all the spare good vibes I have. Xoxo

  10. You are definitely doing the right thing by getting it checked out. And while I personally haven’t gone through this, I do know a couple people who have had surgery on their thyroids for various reasons, and they’re all doing just fine now. So you will totally be fine too. hugs

  12. Jenny, you’re going to be OKAY. <3

    Sending hugs and good vibes.

    You’re doing the right thing gsetting it checked out.

  15. I could distract you with my itchy boob rash thing I’ve got going on, which is scaly and weepy and stings and itches and frantically scratching your boob in public is kind of frowned upon. I hope your lump is nothing to worry about and I’m very glad that you adulted and got it checked out. I’m also adulting and getting itchy boob rash checked.

  16. Keeping you close as the labs come back. I have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis and had papillary thyroid cancer in 2001. I had two surgeries- one to remove my thyroid and a second to remove a rogue lymph node that radiation goofed up. I’m reminding you that I’m alive and well. You will be too. You are doing the right thing by having this investigated.

  18. Sending positive vibes and healing thoughts your way.
    You are a grown-up for checking it out. I have Hashimoto’s and have to keep up on bloodwork, ultrasounds, and meds. Good luck!
    Two of my friends had their thyroid removed and they are great: healthy, beautiful, and happy.

    Good luck, Jenny. Don’t lose your Jingle over this right now.

  19. A) You’re not a hypochondriac, and you’re being VERY grown-up getting this checked out. And B) sending all kinds of good vibes you’re way, it really sounds like it’s just going to be your thyroid and I’m sure they’ll be able to get you to where you can breathe/swallow again. Hang in there….

  21. I’ve had thyroid tumors and had to have a hyperthyroid tumor and gland removed. You are fine, aside from the discomfort, fear, and anxiety that these things bring. If it makes you feel any better, sounds like you’re still walking. When mine was growing I started walking into walls and looking drunk at work, which is always super awesome. As you know, what doesn’t kill us is either making us stronger, postponing the inevitable, or both.

  23. You are not a hypocondriac and you are being a grown up and practicing good self care by getting it checked out. I’m proud of you for getting some doctors involved. I’ll pray for your speedy healing and a good outcome.

  24. You are doing the best thing you could possibly be doing by getting this checked out. Seems like chances are very good it will be just like last time.

    Tell your neck to stop being a dick, and see if having one of the cats draped around it (I’m sure they love to do that) makes you feel any better.

  25. I have not had my thyroid removed, but my MIL has, and, while finding your right levels for replacements can be fiddly, it’s something the Medical Establishment knows how to do. She’s been living thyroid free since the day before I got engaged to my husband. Decades. (And that means decades of learning by Medical types, too. They’ll be smarter with you if this is what it comes to. And she turned out fine even though she had this done at the close of the Iron Age.)

  28. Yes, you are being a grown-up by checking this out. (As I’ve been finding out as I age, individual body parts now demand special attention, which is fine.) Yes, I’ve had friends- cats, even!- who’ve had thyroid removed, no biggie.Yes, good thoughts, but no matter what they tell you, you know your body best; you’ll work it out.

  29. A BFF had hers removed and she said it was just one more piece of shit in her body that she didn’t need anyway. Let it go! Let’s all sing together…”Let it go Let it go you don’t need that thyroid anymore, Let it go let it go…” Throwing lots of good vibes your way Sista Sledge!

  30. Sending you good thoughts <3 that sounds uncomfortable. The good news is you’ve (kind of?) had this before, so hopefully it’s nothing.

  31. You’re not going to be fine, you’re going to be FABULOUS! My thyroid lump earlier this year turned out to be just a cyst. And you are also being a responsible and mature grown-up human by going to the doctor to check this out rather than doing the dance of denial. All my best wishes to you!!

  32. You are going to be okay. Yes, you are a hypochondriac. Yes, it is also very scary. But you are going to be okay – you are tough as nails and this is just one of those freaky body things that happen to us all. hugs

  33. That does sound a bit scary. Very good (and brave!) though for getting it checked out. I’m going to send some love and will keep my fingers crossed it’s all going to be just fine. Good luck with breathing for now..

  35. Sending loads of good thoughts your way Jenny. I too have Hashimoto’s. Hate it especially since I didn’t choose to have. And I know personally one person who had their thyroid remove due to Hyperthyroid. He’s doing well. No problems at all. Again lots of good thought headed your way.

  36. My wife has Hashimoto’s too and has a similar neck lump. Her endocrinologist says she’s okay, so you’re going to be okay too, by extension. (But it’s good and grown-up of you that you’re getting it all checked out instead of relying on my analogous logic)

  37. Someone once told me “Knowledge is power”. You are arming yourself with knowledge by getting tests done. You are brave. You can do hard things.

  40. Sending love and good thoughts your way! You’re doing all the right things in having this checked out, and I’ve got my fingers crossed for you (figuratively; I’m typing right now).

  41. My sister went through this and she was able to get her thyroid meds adjusted and the lump shrank and went away. Very common with the Hashimoto’s crowd, from what I understand. All good vibes comin’ right atcha, lady.

  42. You are going to be ok, because no matter what it is (enlarged thyroid or alien mosquito bite that will give you superpowers) you are kickass and will persevere. We love you and you are being an adult by checking this out.

  44. It will be OK! You are being very adult by going to get it checked out! We love you! And, breathe. I know it’s hard right now but you will have answers soon. 🙏

  45. You may be a hypochondriac, but you are also being a grown-up to get it checked out, so good for you! Fingers crossed all the way that the results are the best they could possibly be.

  47. HI Jenny,
    I am sure you will be fine. You are in good hands. It is good to hear they are taking your concerns seriously

    As for thyroid removal, my mother had her thyroid removed due to an injury before I was born. At this point she has lived without it longer than she had it. The only downsides seem to be the need to take a pill, and being cold when she forgets it.

  48. You are totally being smart to check this out right away. Yes, it’s most likely related to your existing stuff (in which case it’s good to know anyway) but it’s also smart and grown-up to go in to a doctor right away to get it checked in case it isn’t.

  49. I have not had my thyroid removed but my best friend has hers removed when we were 21 and we are 38 now and she is great. Her thyroid was paralyzing her vocal cords which was pretty werid but is now a great story. Her scar is very faint now but it looked like someone tried to slit her throat and I know you can use that look to make a lot of awesome jokes. Sending positive vibes.

  50. …Did I ghostwrite this post? Because you’re feeling exactly what I feel about every mystery lump and mystery pain. You are totally doing A+ adulting by having it checked out! And if you’ve had a similar thing before, the chances that it’s a recurrence of the old thing are SO much greater than the chances that it’s a whole new and more dangerous thing. Which I never quite believe either, but it’s still true.

    I will rub my dogs’ tummies for you, as this is known to output luck and good vibes into the universe.

  51. You are going to be okay. I imagine it is scary and difficult and no one who knows anything is telling you that it is nothing, but it’s going to be okay.

  52. I didn’t have mine removed, but I know people who did, and they’re absolutely fine without it, just take more levothyroxine than they used to. As for me, I have Hashimoto’s, and when I forget my meds I have trouble breathing too, everything just swells shut, so I know it’s scary and scary and scary. You’ll be okay though. Because you’re The Bloggess and we love you so much, the universe would be messing with a LOT of us if it decided to fuck with you. Because we’d fuck it right back. With a broken bottle or a plunger. Or something. You get the idea.

  53. Jenny, that sounds awful! I had an extremely enlarged thyroid with multiple nodules. I had it removed about 6 years ago. The surgery was not bad at all. Overnight stay in the hospital to monitor calcium levels. Some pretty nasty neck pain and an allergic reaction to the steri-strips holding my neck together notwithstanding. Saying a prayer that all is well and it’s no big deal!!

  54. You’ll be fine. My wife, several years ago, had problems with her throat. She could hardly swallow either drinks or food and was positive she was dying. Our car was off the road for a while then so, at 10pm, her, our 2 kids then aged 6 & 8, walked the 2 miles to the energency room to have her condition confirmed as terminal ( or so she thought.) Strep throat! I told her it was that but as she’d never had it before she was convinced she needed to make a will and prepare the kids for Mommy’s departure. Needless to say the walk home was filled with comments from yours truly. You’ll be fine.

  55. I had half of my thyroid removed. It was no problem. I didn’t even stay in the hospital overnight. It was just over a year ago and for a while I told people it was a dueling scar, but now it’s not even noticeable.

    You will be fine.

  57. I am here to remind you of Occam’s razor: the simplest explanation is correct. It’s the known thyroid issue flaring up. It’s not fair, at all, but it’s manageable. It’s a chore. Do not be afraid. Be annoyed.

  58. Sorry your neck is being such a jerk! You can’t really fix something unless you look at it first so good for you for fixing things!! My mom has her thyroid removed and she said it wasn’t bad at all. Thyroids can be real assholes.

  59. You’re a hypochondriac! Like me!! 🙂 I bet it’s just a lymph node gone rogue and that it’ll settle down soon. Maybe you’re being too busy lately? Maybe slooowwwwww downnnnnnn? 🙂 <3

  62. You’re more than okay, Jenny. You’re also wiser than I am, because I waited so long to get that root canal yesterday that they’re probably going to write papers about me. “The pH is 2 which is actually quite impressive.” And oh, the smell. This thing has to be killed in two sessions. I guess that’s why I’ve had a headache every day for the past few weeks. I’m from the old redneck school of waiting for things to go away. Sometimes that just doesn’t work. I’m sending you all the good wishes I’ve got, and I’m not known for that, so there you go.

  63. Sending you light and happiness! My sister had to have her thyroid removed and it really was fine. She got this cool scar across her throat that made her look like she had a run in with an axe murderer but she was so badass she triumphed over him and all she walked away with with a mark on her neck.

  64. I’m very much also a hypochondriac. It will absolutely be fine, hon, I have zero doubt. I’m sure it’s just a thyroid issue! Sending you sooo much love and positive energy! ❤💕❤💕❤💕❤💕❤💕❤

  66. Good job adulting and getting the lump checked out! Definitely the best plan, especially with a history of thyroid issues. It WILL be okay! Sending lots of positive thoughts to you!

  67. So, I was semi excited when I checked into the chiropractor this morning and the name above me was Jenny Lawson. I told the receptionist, that’s my favorite blogger, but she is in Texas, so, probably not her. But then I noticed the only other person in the waiting room was a guy. And when they called him, I thin they called Denny. So either he writes his D’s weird, or I miss heard, or I misread. It was really early, and solstice and all. I’m losing it. Anyway, I almost sort of not met you today. I never had thyroid issues that I know of, but I hope you get answers and try not to worry, and of course heal up quickly.

  68. My sister in law had her thyroid removed a couple years ago and was so relieved immediately after the surgery. It helped right away with her depression and fatigue. I know it’s scary to contemplate losing a body part (even when it’s gently trying to murder you), much less take on another medication, but you are totally being an adult non-hypochondriac about it and you will be fine.

  70. You realize the scary part is right now, right? The not knowing is the scary part. Once you know you can plan, you can fix, and your brain isn’t telling you that you have neck Ebola. Or that the twin you absorbed is growing back so it can sneak out and slaughter your neighbors. No matter the diagnosis, it can be treated and handled. You have a wonderful supportive real life family and friends. You have thousands of us. Whatever the body malfunction all of us will be here for you. We cross time zones. One of the tribe is always awake.
    Your family and friends are there for you. We are there for you. In a noncreepy stalker way of course.
    You got this. You are strong and capable. And even when you don’t think you are those that surround you believe in you.

  72. I’ve had mine removed and it absolutely wasn’t terrible. Most hospitals do it laparoscopically now, and you can’t even see my scar (do NOT Google thyroid scars. I swear they’re just out there to scare you.) I had to spend one night in the hospital and was back to work in just a few days, and there was no pain at all. The only annoyance is having to take thyroid pills for the rest of my life, and it takes a while to get you to the right levels, but that’s a minor inconvenience at best. Let the possibility of this be the least of your worries! Sending you good thoughts and much love.

  74. Sending you virtual hugs! This will all work out and soon you’ll be able to breathe again. Love to you while going through the agonizing waiting part, and forever after.

  75. I have a good feeling that everything will be fine (and it was a funny post. Your sense of humor is a real trooper!)

  76. Good for you for having it checked out. (Personally, I have a tendency to ignore these things or refuse to see a medical professional, so you are way ahead of me.) Sending you positive thoughts and am hoping it turns out to be something simple and benign that you can laugh about later. Also sending you wishes for a very happy holiday season (despite this worry, and the discomfort of it). You have a lovely family, including your extremely affectionate fur babies, and I hope you have light and love through Christmas and into the New Year.

  77. You are being a very good grown up by having it checked out and I’m very proud of you. All the good thoughts and fingers crossed and everything else.

  78. I had my thyroid removed (irradiated) about 15 years ago. It was no big deal! And I got to be radioactive for several days! (I couldn’t cuddle my pets or baby or sleep with my husband, but I did get to declare that I was radioactive which was fun.)

  79. You’ve got this. You’ll be fine. The body is a weird thing. I’ve had skin cancer and now I go into the dermatologist every six months prepared to hear I’m about to die because I found a new thing, and instead I hear “Oh that’s just sun damage” or “a skin tag, nothing to worry about.”

    Sending you thoughts of tranquility and strength,.

  81. My sister had her entire thyroid removed, one lobe at a time a few years apart, and she lives a perfectly normal life. She is a few years older than you and she only has to take the thyroid hormone replacement meds everyday, which she was doing before the removal anyway. She said the surgery was a little scary (sorry!) but all surgery can be a little scary and my sister is a chicken. You’ll be okay. It isn’t a huge deal and life afterward is completely manageable.

  82. Positive thoughts heading your way! Bodies are weird. Let’s hope it’s just a case of something weird that goes away. And stay off WebMD because that is bad for all symptoms. Feel better Jenny!

  83. Good Morning Jenn.

    May this be a blip you can push out of the way and resume. May the medical care you receive be top-notch or at the very least be among the American Top 40. You truly cannot mess around with your health, My Dad ignored something that could have easily been treated and it cost him his life. Never second-guess something if you cannot first-guess it in the first place.

    @WriterDann

  84. I had my whole thyroid removed 11 and a half years ago…it’s sucky, but not terrible. No big bad aftereffects. You will be ok no matter what…we promise! All the hugs!

  88. It’s going to be okay. Chronic illness has a way of f’ing with your mind. Some symptoms can be harmless, indicating nothing wrong, but others are a signal for further investigation and treatment. When you have so many weird symptoms, it’s hard to separate them out, and they snowball you into a mass of pain and anxiety. I have had disturbing throat stuff; turned out to be an esophageal motility issue where I would choke on things like water, and air, and spew everything out on unsuspecting family members. The choking sensation was the worst. I hear you on that. You have great doctors, and they are on top of this. It’s goung to be okay. ❤️

  89. I have Hashimoto’s and an enlarged thyroid. Everything is going to be ok.

    Also… I was told by my doctor that if you are going to get a cancer, Thyroid is the best. Which is weird to type. Because they just take it out and you take more synthroid and then badda bing, you keep going.

    And since I too am a hypochondriac, I like to calm myself by saying that the cancer I feel sure I’m going to get will absolutely be thyroid which is the best. Which also pleases my competitive, perfectionist side.

  90. I am very proud of you for having it checked out! Sending you warm and fuzzy thoughts. We are here for you.

  91. I had a panic attack about my annual checkup this week. Some tests were ordered to monitor an ongoing, and at last check benign, condition. We are being grown ups by getting these things checked, but the waiting on tests is THE WORST! You’re in my prayers for a happy resolution to this latest example of how our bodies keep us on our toes.

  92. Look, if everything else that’s happened to you hasn’t killed you yet, this probably won’t either! 😜

    We love you, Jenny. I’m glad you did the grownup thing and got it checked out.

  93. I had my thyroid removed 30 years ago (had thyroid cancer as a teenager). Surgery plus radiation (in the form of drinking radioactive iodine), and it’s never come back. The surgery was fine. Been taking thyroid hormone pill every day since. I’ve been told it’s the best cancer you can get – I mean, if you had to get cancer, this is the one you’d pick. Mine also started out as lumps in my neck (it had spread to my lymph nodes). You will be ok.

  94. Oh sweetie you are such a grownup!! All will be well and you may even end up with an interesting scar on your neck, if you are in to that sort of thing, ( if not, please forget I mentioned it). Peace to you Jenny, you are a light! Much love and good vibes!

  95. You’re going to be fine; there will be some Christmas, New Year and Spring miracles specially put aside for you. You will get some new stories, perhaps a new toy in a jar, and go out and buy something really bizarre (like a crocheted construction crane) to celebrate. The world will be enriched, we will be grateful. Big hug. x

  96. I’m sending you good thoughts.
    You are doing the right thing by getting it checked out.
    I’ve never had my thyroid removed, but I did leave a good portion of one of my ass cheeks on a driveway when I was in 4th grade. This was thanks to wearing shorts in the 90s, a “sit-N-skate”, a steep hill, and a friend who wouldn’t get out of the way.

    And that turned out okay. My wife even says the hair is even on both sides. 🙂

  97. You sound so much like me here that I felt compelled to write. I often think my health related anxiety and fear of death is unique. Most people with anxiety run to the doctor at any sign of sickness to get reassurance. I avoid doctors at all costs convinced they are there for nothing but to give me bad news. Instead of doctors, I ask my family and friends for reassurance. And most times when I ask for reassurance like this people respond by telling me to go to the doctor. Or they say unhelpful things like “you’re probably okay” or they tell you about friends who did have something terribly erong. There are so many things in the world that make the fear so much worse. And most often the things that make it really bad are internal. I get stuck in the magical thinking. Thoughts like if you see a commercial about cancer while you are suffering these symptoms that is further proof that you are dying. Do you ever feel that way??

    Anyways, I wanted to tell you what I always need to hear when I thought spiral about my impending death. You are going to be okay no matter what. You are going to get through this no matter what. You are strong enough to face anything and although this is likely nothing more than your fear making you more afraid, no matter the outcome you will not only survive, but come out the other side of this fear stronger than you were before. And most importantly….you are not alone.

    I hope you get answers quickly because the waiting truly is the worst.

  98. Dearest Jenny – my heart goes out to you as I have the same fear – that my body is riddled with cancer and any new thing has to be a form of cancer. It is a dreadful fear I was so embarrassed to mention to any doctor. However, just about 18 months ago, I did come clean. My doctors have been wonderful and have agreed to tests etc to ease my mind. I think you are VERY BRAVE and VERY SENSIBLE to investigate this issue. A real grown-up in my estimation! My love and good thoughts are winging your way. Be as strong as you can while this all plays out. Just remember, you are surrounded by people who love you. It’s okay to be scared, just don’t let the scary demons take you over – we’ll all protect you.

  99. Jenny I know exactly how you are feeling, I am always reverting to the ‘oh my god I have cancer that’s spread throughout my body’ scenario. Like you said you just want someone to tell you it’s alright. It sounds to me like it’s something to do with your Hashimotos and I’m sure it will go as quickly as it came. You will be alright 😘

  101. From one hypochondriac to another: if it happened before and you came out fine, you should be fine again. And as a fellow hypochondriac, I’ve already come up with a few non-thyroid, non-cancer, fully treatable options if you’re interested.

  104. I’ve had my thyroid removed. It wasn’t that bad but these things are scary. And I got to run around the grocery store scaring people because it looked I had been to a botched beheading. And now you can’t even see the scar. You can do this. It will be okay. 🍀💚🍀💚🍀

  105. A friend of mine just had her thyroid removed, and turns out it is cancer, but her prognosis is very good. The bright side is that the surgery was not awful, and she felt almost immediate relief from the annoying cough, hoarseness, difficulty breathing she had when her thyroid was in there. I hope this all goes as painlessly and worry-free as possible for you, Jenny. Sending love from an adoring fan, also with Hashimoto’s (well controlled so far, knock wood).

  106. You are definitely being an awesome grown up to get this checked out and you are incredibly brave to be vulnerable enough to share your fears with all of us. You inspire me in so many ways and near the top of the list is reaching out for support when you need it. Sending you all the good thoughts and feelings! All the best to you!

  108. My dad had throat cancer, and has been cancer free for almost 10 years and is in great shape. Sending you well wishes for whatever it turns out to be.

  109. My mom had her thyroid removed decades ago. She’s 91 now. Sending love and strength to you. xo

  110. Thyroid issues are the goddamn worst!! I’m hypothyroid myself. Screws with your whole body. Stay strong I’m sure you’ll be ok!!

  111. From one hypochondriac to another, I am sending you a gentle (but fierce) hug. You’re going to be okay 💜💜💜

  112. You’re doing so well at adulting, Jenny! Go you! Mel Jouwan, of Well Fed paleo cookbooks fame, has had to have her thyroid removed, and wrote about it on her blog several times. https://meljoulwan.com/ is her URL, and maybe there is comforting info there? I can tell you that she’s thriving and happy and healthy from all that she posts on her blog and instagram and all the cookbooks she continues to publish.

    Sending you so many holiday scented and comforting hugs! You’re going to be fine. xo

  113. I’m sending you all the good thoughts, and I’m confident you’ll be fine. Yay to you for being a grownup and involving professionals who can ensure that you remain fine. Also, a friend of mine with Hashimoto’s had her thyroid removed (it was the size of a large lemon and very fond of trying to strangle her), and it was an easy surgery and easy recovery, and the only downside was she didn’t get a big scar so she couldn’t lie and say someone tried to slit her throat.

  116. It’s okay honey!! Even if it’s cancer, thyroid is the best cancer. I had it twenty-five years ago and my doctor and I are growing old together.

  117. Sending good thoughts your way; you’ll get through this. I had my thyroid removed in 1994, and the worst part about it was – you’re not going to like this – it really hurt to laugh for a few days. I had a few friends who visited me in the hospital who I had to send home because they were making me laugh so hard. Anyway, it’s been almost 25 years since I had my thyroid removed because of cancer, and other than the need to take thyroid hormone, the only lasting effect is the extra “smile” I have on my neck from the small surgical scar. Facing surgery is never easy, but bottom line, having my thyroid removed was not terrible.

  118. You are going to be ok. It’s most likely just the same kind of thing as before, and if they have to remove part of it, you’ll do fine. And you are being incredibly responsible and grown up handling this. GO YOU. Much love, much appreciation. (I have a bunch of asshole med issues too. Total drag, but just part of life for us not-put-together-quite-normally types. <3 )

  119. Thinking of you, Jenny. I’m sorry you have to sit through an anxious wait like this. We’ll all sit through it with you.

  120. You’ll be okay, you really will. You’ll get checked, you’ll find out what the deal is, and proceed from there. I’ve known two women who gave their thyroid back to the universe and they did (and continue to do) absolutely fine. Good thoughts, best thoughts, and love!

  122. I had a reoccurring cyst in my thyroid when I was young, 13 I think. Anyway, the doctor would drain it by sticking a really big needle in it – they’d tell me not to swallow because that would make the needle jump around and be a bad thing. I would try to get all my swallowing out of the way, the nurse would hold my head, the doctor would jab me and then push on the cyst. They did this regularly until I was 16 and then decided to take out my thyroid. I was glad to not have to do the needle thing. So very glad! It was painful for a couple weeks, I couldn’t turn my neck very well because it would pull on my stitches. I have a really neat scar along the base of my throat. It’s faded and slightly ropy but not that noticeable. When I was younger, in my 20’s, I would get asked about it. Depending on the person I would either explain about my boring thyroid or tell them I was in a bar fight and the other guy had a knife.
    I am sending good thoughts and hope it all turns out well.

  123. I am a thyroid cancer survivor… and you got this!!! It’s a walk in the park compared to what you have already been through in life!!

    I got a lump after my first baby… Dr said I was too young for cancer at 22, and did no tests… got a new dress a few years later and had surgery 2 months later. 9 large tumors, 2 surgeries and one radiation treatment later and I’m good to go!!

    You got this.

  124. You’re going to be fine. Anxiety and weird body stuff are the worst combination. I had bumps on my wrists the other day and a knot in my neck. I convinced myself that I had malignant skin cancer that had spread to my lymph nodes. I went over to my friend who is an ER doc to see if I could celebrate Christmas before having to go to a dermatologist and inevitably tell my family I had stage 4 cancer. It was heat rash. Good job getting it checked out. Very very adult. Much better than Dr. Google.

  127. It’s important [very adult—the adultiest] you listen to your body and went to the doctor. Sets a great example for Hailey and your readers. 🍪🏅

    You’ll be ok—whatever the results. If they have to remove the thyroid? Ok—sounds like yours is a giant asshole anyways.

    I mean—not suggesting you have a sphincter on your neck or anything—just saying your —never mind.

    Happy thoughts.

  128. I can maybe assuage your mind a little here:
    1- It might be a cyst. I get those a LOT and they’re not cancerous 99% of the time. I have one on my thyroid right now and it’s fine and not going anywhere.
    2- Thyroid cancer is very rare. BUT, it is also very treatable.
    3- If they have to kill your thyroid, you’ll be ok there too. My brother had to have his zapped when he was in high school. (Thyroid problems run in the family, I have them too). It’s been SO much easier for him to control his thyroid since it was killed dead than when it was zooming back and forth all over the place, he’s happy it’s gone.
    4- You are adulting really well and it is totally and completely OK to be scared. And you don’t have to be funny for us. Whatever happens, we’re all friends here and we’ll be there for you no matter what happens.
    5- If you do have to have surgery, you’ll have a small but really cool scar and you get to make up really interesting stories about it and/or blame Victor for it. Bonus.

  129. My wife lost half her thyroid to Hashimoto’s when still in her twenties and the rest of it to cancer many years later. The cancer diagnosis happened at the biopsy of the thyroid remnant, and wasn’t particularly suspected, though I don’t remember the particulars of why it needed to be removed. (probably started swelling) In any case, when the remnant was removed, the standard procedure was to treat it as cancer and take the nearest lymph nodes as well, so when the diagnosis came, the surgery was already taken care of. The general attitude of her and her health providers has been that if you’re going to have cancer, thyroid cancer is the kind to have. Not to say that it’s not scary as hell, but…

    The most difficult part of all this has been regulating her thyroid hormone, as no combination of standard dosage pills works perfectly, but she has learned over the years how to interpret the blood test results and her own feeling to regulate her dosage fairly well.

    It wish the best for you, and if you like, will get you in touch with her.

  131. I have Hashi’s too. My thyroid will blow up to enormous proportions on occasion. Dr adjusts my meds and all is well. Sending you good vibes and a hug.

  132. Sending you lots of good positive energy (and feel good purrs from Paul Cat).

  134. You are a fierce healing machine! Sending you lots of love and smooth sailing towards an easy resolution .

  135. I had one swollen tonsil a few years ago. I was on a ton of meds for my ulcerative colitis, and some med made it swell up. My doctor had me go to an ENT to get another opinion, and I was freaked out. It ended up being nothing, and yours will be too, because you’re a hypochondiac, Jenny, and you’re also the best kind of person. I do highly suggest naming your thyroid, as that was great comic relief for me when my husband and I cracked on Thomas, the trepidacious two-timing Tonsil. 🙂

  137. I had a weird, not painful neck lump a few years ago. I couldnt turn my head, take a deep breath, and I started to look a bit weird to my coworkers. My doctor’s eyes bugged out when he saw it and got me to an ENT in a week. I was scared shitless. Turns out it was a lymph node that had just stopped draining.

  138. Mine was enlarged from Graves’ disease (hyperthyroid) and I took anti-thyroid meds then 1 radiation pill finished it off. No surgery. Lifelong synthroid! Good luck! Not all lumps are cancers!

  140. I’ve had my thyroid removed. It was huge and pushing on my windpipe as well. It was the size of a football when they finally took care of it. The scariest part was the surgery. It’s always scary giving up control and in that situation, you have none. The recovery was ok. I had a really great vivid scar for about a year. Every time someone tried to mess with me at work, I just told them to look at my neck. When they did, I’d say “See this? Bar fight. Keep going.” It was great. But then it faded. Can’t even tell now. Anyway, this might be a good thing for you. If it is the thyroid acting up, removing it and going on replacement therapy should help other things wrong with you. The thyroid affects so much. Just be really, really, proactive about making sure they check your hormone levels afterwards. I’m not normal at what they consider normal thyroid levels. Took me a long time to get them to understand that.

  141. I had my thyroid removed in an outpatient surgery several years ago. It was a quick, painless surgery and now I take a daily dose of synthroid that occasionally has to be adjusted for the correct levels. Sending love and good thoughts.

  142. Your concerns are valid & i’m SO glad you went to the doctor. Things like this are always scary – benign or not! But the fact remains, that in order to take care of your family, you must take care of yourself. and you are doing that. In more ways than one.

    I am saying Mi Sheberach prayers for you (so you got the Jews on your side as well)! I will also pray for you to get larger shoulders to carry whatever burden comes your way in life.

    My mom had part of her thyroid removed & later almost all her parathyroids. (I didn’t even know those existed). None of it was a big deal, except regulating her calcium. but of course, surgery is a big deal, to the person having it done. But if it is making it difficult to breathe, & the dr says to, have the surgery. Know that you have millions of friends that are holding your hand in their hearts, while we stay away, hiding from world, swallowing our own stress, depression, whatever. We do this willingly, because we all adore you AND it helps to take our minds off ourselves at the same time.

    Recovery is not bad at all. Just don’t eat rice krispies just after surgery. i still feel guilty about giving that to my mom. she accidentally broke a stitch or 2 & they went right back into surgery & fixed it in about 20 min. i admit it. i was a complete idiot while trying to take care of my mom…..

    You’ve got this!

  143. Sending all the good thoughts I have your way. If you do have to have your thyroid removed, make sure your surgeon is a reasonably weird individual who thinks like us. Before I had a complete hysterectomy in 2003 I told my doctor I wanted to see my uterus, since I’d had a 40+ year long, contentious relationship with the damn thing and I wanted it to know I’d won. She wouldn’t do it, mumbling something about “hospital rules” and “pathology”. I even brought her a camera to at least take a picture, but somehow that didn’t happen either. She thought I was weird, but I still maintain it was MY uterus and I had every right to take it home with me if I wanted it. I hope you don’t have to have surgery, but if you do–STAND YOUR GROUND. It’s YOUR thyroid. Threaten them with a charge of theft of organ if they won’t cooperate. Here’s hoping you have a healthy and happy 2019!

  144. When I was 6 years old I had a really really bad case of the mumps. I couldn’t go to school or even see any other kids and pretty much I sat in front of a powered off TV and stared at my freakishly swollen neck reflected in the screen. My mom felt so sorry for me she kept leaving the room so I didn’t see her cry. So finally she decided my oldest sister (who lived with my Dad–long story) could come over and play with me to take my mind off it, because she had already had the mumps. She came in with a stack of board games, sat in the floor across from me, and exclaimed, “God your jaws are fat!” So I guess the moral of this story is, at least my sister isn’t coming over to cheer you up? I don’t know. But you have done everything you can by calling the doctor, which means figuring out what to do about this is no longer on your to-do list. Check it off, move on. You’re strong and brave and fabulous. Nothing can take you down!

  145. Did you know that in cats they are injected with radioactive iodine to kill the thyroid? For 6 months afterwards, you have to store their used cat litter in the garage because it’s too radioactive for landfills.

    I think surgical removal is probably better. I know people who have had their thyroid removed and are completely healthy and lead normal lives.

  146. I had mine removed 25 years ago due to thyroid cancer, and I was pregnant at the time! All went well and my baby is twenty five and the light of my life. Let your doctors be there for you. You’ll be ok. xoxo

  147. I had a lump on mt thyroid too! It was a nodule full of fluid. The doctor drained it several times (uncomfortable but not painful) until I finally had it removed. Recovery wasn’t bad really. Cool scar.

  148. I had half my thyroid removed. IT was not a big deal. Granted, I’m a breast cancer survivor, but still. My endocrinologist was great and I felt so good I didn’t even spend the night in the hospital after the surgery. And the eurgeon depended the scar into the lines on my neck. So, don’t worry…you’ll be okay.

  150. Sending all the good vibes I can spare! Every lumpy thing I’ve ever had has fortunately been benign, resolved itself, or is still there but I’ve given up worrying about it cause it hasn’t killed me yet. Hoping the same for you.

  151. You have always been such a source of light and laughter and self compassion – Sending all the juju your way today!

  152. whenever I’m stressed about something, I sing Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds”.: Don’t worry ‘bout a thing, cuz every little thing is gonna be alright. If you can listen to the song, that helps too. Sending lots of love, light, & healing vibes to you. This is my message to you—ooo—ooo ❤️

  153. I have Hashimoto’s too and went through pretty much exactly this a few years ago! Big lump suddenly bigger and terror that it was cancer. It all turned out fine; I was told chances of cancer were very low but was still scared. I had to have a thyroid uptake scan, and the technician was quirky and funny and kinda hot; he flirted with me during the boring part of the process where I had to lie still and look at the ceiling, and it made the nervousness melt away. (I am not a person who gets flirted with, so this was novel). 😀

    I still have my thyroid, but I know two people who’ve had it removed, and no, it was not terrible and they’e doing just fine. <3 You will too, whatever way it goes! You will be fine. In fact, as you already know, thyroid problems can cause all kinds of symptoms, so maybe at the end of this process, you’ll have a solution to some of them and you’ll feel better! I know I did– it was near-miraculous once I got on the right balance of meds. I wish the same for you. Sending love and healing energy. <3<3<3

  154. Jenny, I’m praying for you. But here’s a little something similar for you. Early last summer I found a breast lump, which I thought was a gland, and promptly ‘forgot’ about it, because lumps come and go – and, I’m paranoid, and have this stupid notion that if I ignore it, it’ll go away. Late August I discovered that is got huge, and was prepared for the worst before I even called the doctor. It turned out to be some weird thing I can’t pronounce, and had to copy & paste for you to see the name – Pseudoangiomatous stromal hyperplasia. A rare overgrowth of cells. In essence, I’m a unicorn, because I have other rare things, like cornea dystrophy and bradydactyly of a type the genetics people can’t identify. Everything will be okay. We love you and we all have you in our thoughts.

  155. You are doing the adult thing. I’m going through a scary med problem now too, but here’s the positive energy I can spare today…➕ ➕ ➕ ➕ ❎ 2 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  156. Ok, so my friend had her thyroid removed but before they did, they gave her radiation pulls that made her GLOW IN THE DARK. I mean, that just sounds like you all over.
    After she had it removed (seriously, NBD) she was left with a scar on her neck that looks like somebody tried to slit her throat and now she tells people that it was from a bar fight and you should see the other guy. (Um, also sounds like you!)
    You totally got this. I see nothing but wins and fantastic stories all the way around.
    Go get ’em.

  157. Jenny- EVERY time my body presents a new issue I leap immediately to the worst-case scenario. A few years ago I had something pressing on my throat. I had to hold my head in a certain position in order to feel I could breathe naturally. I talked to my doctor, my dentist, I had swabs and ultrasounds and yada yada yada. No conclusive results, but I could feel it.
    Then it went away. My personal opinion is that my body was fighting something, and some glands were doing their thing. I’m sending you my positive “GO, GLANDS” vibe.

  158. My boyfriend had his thyroid removed because it got crazy big almost overnight. He’s had to adjust to thyroid meds, but he’s amazingly healthy. Sending you so much positivity and spoons!

  160. Your neck is being a real dick about swallowing? You will not die but I think I may from all the jokes in my head colliding. Seriously, I am a triple negative breast cancer survivor. You will be okay. No matter what you hear from the doctor, you will be okay. Worst case scenario, you will get medical treatment, and then you will be okay. When all is said and done, you will be okay, Jenny. Just breathe. And enjoy the vacay from, well…yeah. That.

  161. You are so loved, and all that love will protect you!
    Plus, my older sister had her thyroid out like 25-30 years ago, and she’s fine. She takes her medication, and has never had a bad day since. And, the little scar caused her husband (and, honestly, the rest of the family) to refer to her as “My little zipper-neck” which, as a fan of Young Frankenstein (it’s “Frahnkensteen!”), she kind of dug.

    Knowing Victor you have that to look forward to, and also — built-in Hallowe’en costume!

    Also, for what it’s worth, humor is HANDS DOWN the best way to deal with ANYTHING. You have to laugh, especially in the face of bad news, even when you don’t feel like you can. For example, at age 38, I was told I had a rare-ish liver disease that was fatal without a transplant I cannot actually have because of my drug allergies, and I had maybe 5-10 years to live. My immediate response, to the doctor was “well, I can stop worrying about my retirement plan, anyway. that’s a relief.”

    I’m 53 now, and my “official” motto is “There is nothing so dire that it cannot be helped by Sick Humor and/or chocolate”.

    Find something that ALWAYS makes you laugh (my go-to is any of the “cats with brain freeze” compilation on YouTube, if you don’t have something handy)

    Also, when stressed, I will go someplace away from humans and bark like a small and very pissed off dog. Relieves stress AND is so incredibly goofy, you have to laugh at yourself.

    Sending good vibes and tons of love and respect your way,

    Amy

  162. Jenny, Bummer!!! Most likely it has to do with Hashimoto’s. My husband was diagnosed with the “H” several years ago. We had never heard of this before. You are being most adult-like in getting checked out. My vote is that all will be well and you will be back to your normal (???) self shortly – I have a very good voting record. HUGS!!!!!

  163. Jesus, I FEEL better reading these responses and I’m not sick. I’m so sorry this is happening and sending white light and positive Yule energy your way <3

  164. You will be okay. You are doing the smart thing having it checked out. You are fine. Believe it if for no other reason than I do.

  165. I know a couple of people who have had their thyroids removed and they are both well. Good for you for getting it checked You don’t want your thyroid hugging your windpipe. Take care!

  166. My mother-in-law had her thyroid removed 53 years ago and is doing great! I have a friend who had hers removed 6 years ago and she is doing great too! I’m sending you all the positive thoughts I’ve got!

  167. You’re not just OK, you’re awesome. Really. You already know you have reason for your thyroid to act up, so there’s that. Thyroid stuff can be soooo dramATic – but the fact is, it’s also a (relatively) straightforward fix. If you have it removed, don’t let them tell you the recovery time is three days- it’s more like a week, but you will recover.

    And it’s not like they take people’s heads off to cure this anymore, so you WILL be OK, no matter what it is.

  168. I had my thyroid removed a few years ago. Turns out it was FULL of tumors, growing up my throat, choking me and making it difficult to swallow and to breathe. They were also, so I hear, choking off the blood flow to my brain. These had been growing for years, and the changes were so gradual that I didn’t notice until it was completely out of control. It was super scary, BUT- the surgery is relatively simple and I felt a million times better almost immediately! I had no idea how bad I actually felt until it was gone. Truly, I never was so happy to have had surgery. It was not cancer, but my Dr told me that thyroid cancer is the best cancer to have(if you have to have cancer) I guess it rarely spreads? Anyhow, the replacement drugs are easy, one you get them figured out and life goes back to normal pretty quickly. Happy to answer any questions you may have about any of it… love and all the best thoughts to you

  169. It’s going to be ok! I personally have not had my thyroid out but my step mom, co worker and 2 close friends have all had theirs removed, it went well for all of them and they are all doing fine now.

  170. You are being adult and doing absolutely the right thing to get this taken care of ASAP. I have a friend who had her thyroid removed when she was small and is now going on 70 and is in excellent health. You will TOTALLY kick this lump’s ass to the curb. Go get ‘em, Jenny!

  171. Jenny I am sending good and positive thoughts your way that all is going to be okay. It must be scary to wait it out but you will pull through. Oh, and tell your neck to not be a dick. 🙂

  172. It’s really annoying when your body just decides there’s a fairly essential part that maybe you can be without for a sec, like, ‘surely it’s not thaaaat important, right?’, even though it totally is. glaring at airways Thinking of good things at you! You’ve done good adulting by getting it checked out! Well done! Hope it gets sorted out sooner than soon!

  176. It’s going to be your thyroid. You may have some of it removed. You will get through it just fine, and find yourself six months from now taking one more pill per day and handling it just fine. You got this, girl.

  177. Prayers for your healing and comfort. There’s a whole community of us thinking about you and sending healing thoughts your way!

  178. Glad you are having it checked out! It could be any number of things! I am a nurse and can’t stress enough you need to find out what exactly is causing this! I have Thyroid nodules but they don’t hurt or cause swallowing difficulties!
    Good thoughts and hugs going out to you!❤️❤️❤️

  179. First, sending love, healthy thoughts and a boat load positive energy. Getting this checked is the adult thing to do. Going through these tests will be scary. Hard. We are all here —not holding your hand because that might be creepy-we are Jenny’s Army, cheering you on, sending our support. Whatever this is you, you will beat it. You are stronger than whatever is causing this lump. We have your back.

    Also, if it is your thyroid, could Zazzle make one in silver so we could wear them in solidarity? Maybe a thyroid-in-a-jar in silver?

  180. Being a hypochondriac is better than ignoring possible problems and not getting them checked out. At least that’s what I tell myself when I fear whatever disease I think I have. Sending good thoughts.

  181. You are being awesomely smart about all of this by getting things checked out. I am sure it will be something completely boring and text book and the docs will be disappointed that you are not going to allow them to discover the next THING ™

    I have not had my thyroid removed, but I know folks who have and everything is all good 🙂

  182. Good thoughts always. I read an article recently about a woman with a similar problem and her issue was salivary stones. As in stones in her salivary glands. They had to remove it and everything worked out. So that’s still scary but not cancer… so maybe helpful as an alternative? You an a kick-ass awesome woman who is a total badass warrior and even if you hide in your cat teepee- it is all good and will work out. Just know that it will take time. You’re being a total adult about all of this. No worries.

  183. It will all be good. I know three sisters who had their thyroids removed – two of them proactively before there were any problems (family history). All three are doing wonderfully and have acted like it was no big deal. The big deal is finding out things, not the actual doing things. You aren’t a hypochondriac for wanting to eat and breathe without choking.

  184. You are doing a great job adulting! My sister has Hashimoto’s, and had one parathyroid and her thyroid removed. It was a bery easy process, and she got to walk around with stitches on her throat. This bothered our Dad, who thought she should wear a scarf. She said she was not cold. I thought the stitches made her look tough. Hang in there! You will be o

  185. You’ll be OK. I don’t think you’re a hypochondriac – if you were, the doctors would probably treat your problems differently. You just have health problems. Turns out those increase with age (and I’m old enough to say that with painful confidence).

    So get yourself treated, get better, and we will all be there to cheer you on.

  187. I had my thyroid removed many years ago because of a benign cyst. The scary part was all before the surgery because of all the tests and because I hadn’t been in a hospital since birth. There was very little discomfort and I recovered quickly. I was left with an impressive scar and a large collection of turtlenecks, both now pretty much gone. Sending love and positive vibes. You’ve got this! Really.

  188. I had 2/3rds of my thyroid removed a few years ago and your neck lump sounds a lot like what happened to me! I had a toxic multinodular goiter which usually only 70-year oldish women get but my body was like “nah, gonna do it in your 30s.” It sounds gnarly but it really wasn’t bad. The worst part was having to give up caffeine until they took it out. I was like “You can rip this out with your bare hands right now if it means I can have a mocha.” But the surgery and recovery were much easier than I expected and the remaining 3rd of my thyroid works properly now! Sending good vibes that yours is something relatively simple! It’s always scary to not know but hopefully you figure it out soon!

  189. Someone I know had her thyroid out (I can’t remember why, but it wasn’t cancer), and her mental filter went with it!! She’s now a sassy spitfire of a woman, who can finally sass her husband back, and I love her all the more for it!! She has a little bit of a hard time regulating her body temperature, but overall she’s good!!

  190. I read this too quickly and somehow jumped to the conclusion that they might want to remove part of your windpipe, and I thought “WTF, can they DO that?” Yeah, don’t think so. I’m pretty confident in telling you that they’re not going to remove your windpipe. Does that help?

  191. You will be fine because you are strong, stubborn and fabulous! You have nothing to worry about! Sending you lots of love and positive thoughts and feels, you got this! 😎

  192. 1) You can have all of the good thoughts that I am not currently sending to other people (I have a lot left so they are yours!)
    2) You’re not a hypochondriac – you are being very good at adulting by getting this checked out so I am very impressed!
    3) Haven’t had my thyroid removed… But I completely believe the other posters who are saying they have and it wasn’t terrible. So please believe them too!

  193. For what its worth, some years ago I had a virus that caused my thyroid to be infected and swell. Very scary! Endocrinologist put me on anti biotics and high strength NSAIDs. Fixed it. Hope you recover quickly and without any problems. You are being very adult😉

  194. You are definitely doing the right thing by getting it checked out. I’m sending you lots of good vibes today. Not really like those in the cartoon below — I just thought this was funny and might make you smile.

    https://goo.gl/images/Jc4Hqu

  195. Thyroid issues run in my family like drunk unicorns, so I understand this fear rather well! An author I enjoy reading found out she had thyroid cancer, and it was described to her by her doctors as “if you’re going to get cancer, this is the one you want to have. It’s easy to treat, usually doesn’t come back, and it’s the least likely to cause you any long term effects.” To which she replied: “So it’s basically the Tom Hanks of cancers?” And it was. She had it removed, is doing wonderfully well and writing book #9 which I can’t wait to read. 🙂

    So. Good news is that you have awesome healthcare peeps looking after you, you have many magical friends on the interwebs cheering you on, and a fantastic family who’ll stick closer to you than an inflamed thyroid. And, even if it is the worst case scenario, at least it’s Tom Hanks. 🙂

  196. You’re going to be fine. You’re on my mind a lot but I’ll make sure to focus directly on the neck area.
    You are being so adult about this by not ignoring it and going to the doctor that I’m actually in awe. I’m pretty bad at adulting like this, so great job on that front. And I’d actually worry about you if you weren’t anxious about it. Maybe not to the extreme you are (because yeah, hypochondriac and anxiety just love to run with this shit), but worry is normal nonetheless. Deep breaths and keep telling your feelings to sit the fuck down and let the adult run this thing.

    Love to you, Victor, Hailey, Dorothy Barker, Ferris Mewler, and Hunter S. Tomcat. Did I miss anyone? Well, love to them too.

  197. You will kick that thyroids ass – no matter what the results are. There is nothing worse than feeling a part of your body that you SHOULD NOT be aware of. Makes me obsess and think morbid thoughts until I no longer feel them. Or I befriend them…there is always that option. I guess I fail at adulting. It will all be OK Jenny! Sending positive juju your way!

  198. The Maine Coons (Mr.Man and Little Miss) send lots of warm purrs, big fat hairy paws on your nose and large tails to waft across your face. They believe you will be okay. And so do I.

  199. I have had my thyroid removed due to cancer – it appeared in a lymph node next to it, an enlarged lump. I cannot lie – it sucks – because cancer. But it was not terrible and I am over 10 years from it and I am doing fine – the thyroid meds have to be adjusted every so often as I age and other things happen to my body. After surgery(if that is what you have to have) you look like you survived getting your throat slit so you could come up with a great story about how bad ass you are. And, just in case you didn’t know, you are already bad ass for all that you have been through.
    I am sending you all the healing vibes and virtual hugs you need!

  201. Hey, Jenny. You’re going to be okay. But it’s okay to not be okay right now.

    I had a 5cm thyroid nodule 9 years ago. I went through ultrasounds and those God awful biopsies for a few years before the biopsies started looking not-so-great. They took my thyroid gland out in 2012.

    The surgery itself was fine. It’s a very precise surgery because of nearby vital structures, so lengthy (I’m a PA now, so I really get it).

    Post-op, I felt like I’d been hit by a truck for a few days. Not sure if that’s run of the mill stuff or if that’s because they gave me Dilaudid as they wheeled me out of surgery, then chased it with 50mg if IV Benadryl when I turned red and blotchy and asked my husband to scratch my skin off. I’ve never slept that well in my life!

    6 years later, I’m doing great. Have only adjusted my Synthroid dose once in that time (4 months after surgery). SUPER important to take it correctly (on an empty stomach, nothing to eat or drink for 30 min after).

    Happy to answer any questions or just send virtual hugs.

  203. You are okay and are totally going to be okay! I think it’s totally normal to go to the worst case scenario; at least, that’s what I tell myself since that seems to be my default. Sending so many good vibes, thoughts, prayers and love you’re way!! Keep being a bad ass, you’ve got this.

  204. As someone who has been a hypochrondriac all of my life with bi-polar depression (I am sure these go hand in hand) AND diagnosed with and cured of breast cancer you will be great. It is what it is – take care of it with your doctors so you can get on with enjoying your life. Love to you.

  205. Jenny, I’m glad you’re doing the adult thing and getting this checked out. Chances are it’s nothing, or nothing major but better safe than sorry. Sending you all good thoughts and prayers. And cows. Because cows are cool. Moo.

  206. Sending you tons of healing wishes, admiration for being such a grown up in a scary situation, and thanks for all you do to help make us all feel better.

  208. I don’t know if this will help, but my husband had a huge lump on the side of his face (like the temple area) that went all the way down to his cheek. I was convinced it was cancer, but the dermatologist said it’s nothing and didn’t even remove it. Which, great, but really? I’ll just call him Lumpy McLumperson now. 🙂 It will all be okay!!!

  209. You are being very grown-up for getting this checked out. Adulting sucks but it’s good in the end to catch things on the earlier side.
    Lots of good thoughts for you.
    No experience having thyroid removed but if you can, before you do get it removed you should totally take some pictures of it talking to you like Richard E. Grant’s boil in How to Get Ahead in Advertising.

  210. I am saying everything you need to hear, topped with everything you want to hear, and garnished with marzipan T-Rex’s wearing tutus, roller skates, and tiaras.

  211. Sending loads of positive energy and sparkly stuff that sing your favorite music to soothe you.

  212. My mother had her thyroid removed about 15 years ago. It was so scary at the time and we were so worried that she wouldn’t survive or that she would survive but would be totally different. Looking back at it through the relief of several years, she’s just fine and as amazingly loving as always (perhaps even more so because she’s had 15 years’ more practice and the debilitating pain is gone), and we get the added bonus of making inappropriate jokes about her lobotomy and brain transplant. I know the thyroid and the brain aren’t the same thing, but some nuances aren’t important when there are Dr. Frankenstein jokes to be made. (The nuance between Dr. Frankenstein and his monster? Super important. The nuance between the thyroid and the brain? Apparently not so much. It’s all about priorities.)

    Not sure whether I’m being helpful or not. Not sure that much at all is helpful on this side of the scare. We all love you so much: take care and distract yourself by thinking up all your best lobotomy jokes now, is all I’m saying. They’ll definitely come in handy when you’ve come through to the other side.

  213. I had the same thin happen to me last year. I was literally choking, my thyroid was so big. It was the BEST THING EVER! to have it taken out!!! I woke up after surgery and felt like singing and dancing (I couldn’t, b/c I had just had surgery on my throat, but I wanted to!!)!! My surgeon actually said he’ll never forget how happy I was when he came to see me post-op!! If you already have Hashimoto’s (I did) you’re likely already taking synthroid, so that’s that’s no biggie.
    The best advice I can give you is to fight to get it out….it will change your life in a good way, and then you won’t ever have to worry about cancer in it again!

  214. You will totally be okay and I am joining all the others sending you good vibes. You do so much good for others Jenny, thank you for asking for this and allowing us to do good things for you!

  215. You are being amazingly grownup and impressively adultish (wouldn’t want to be all adult, there is no fun in that) getting it all checked out. My kitties and I are sending you happy healthy thoughts and purrs. The kitties have just added a few very serious head bonks and licks to the list.

  216. What you need is answers. As soon as you have answers you’ll feel way better. It’s the unknown that sucks.

  217. Healing blue energy headed your way. Good you didn’t let it go any longer. You are not alone. You have friends, family,and well wishers all around you who love you.

  218. My sister in law had hers removed because she has Hashimoto’s too – She had 2 surgeries to remove just the growth the first time and the thyroid the second – she ended up losing her sense of smell but other than that, she’s very healthy, happy and going to be married next year! 😀

  220. I recently had to have a thyroid biopsy because it was enlarged. I know I t’s scary . My doctor said 10% or less of thyroid masses are malignant, and they are among the most treatable of cancers. Mine was all clear, and I will pray that yours is too.

  222. I’m sending you all my love and positivity.
    My step-mom had her thyroid removed a bunch of years ago and she said it wasn’t too bad.
    You’re gonna be fine ❤️

  223. I had 1/2 of my thyroid removed in 1995. Recovery was pretty easy. You have to be right up on me to see my scar. Or be my new ENT, or my sister-in-law who is oddly obsessed with it. Sending positive vibes your way!

  224. I had half my thyroid removed (in hopes that the other half would keep working. Ha! No.) Anyway, it was a non-cancerous tumor. I healed quickly and the doctor put the scar in the crease of my neck so no one even notices. I went home the next day and all is fine. On meds to do the job of my thyroid but I can swallow and breath so that’s good.

  225. Sending good thoughts. You are wise to get it checked out. I had a partial thyroidectomy years ago, not sure it was entirely necessary because at the time they told me it was very slow growing & might never cause problems. Sounds as though yours is moving quickly though so I’d be worried too, breathing & eating being kind of important. Google iodine, might help.

  226. My mother had hers removed because of tumors on her thyroid and lived for 25+ years. I’d like to say she was super healthy but she wouldn’t take care of her diabetes. But her thyroid never bothered her again!

    It’s OK. A glitch in your holiday plans but you’ll be OK. Take good care of yourself and your sweet family.

  227. Not me, but my friend had her thyroid removed a couple of years ago. She is doing completely fine. Gets her levels checked regularly and so far everything seems to be under control. I think it is so common to have thyroid issues now that it is getting to be routine, which is good (in a “they know what they’re doing” way). I have a number of positive thoughts that I can share, so I will wing them your way across the prairies and whatever else is between us. 🙂 Good luck and well done adulting so well. There are many that could take lessons from you. Myself included.

  228. So, yeah, if they take that damn thyroid out it’s like instant weight loss for one, and you just take synthroid after that. My mom did it and she kept trying to get the doctor to up her synthroid dose because it causes weight loss if you take too much. My mom’s doctor told her she was being ridiculous and vain and my mom said “OMG!! Dr. Fran, if you had no thyroid and knew you could lose weight just by taking extra synthroid I know you would do it too!”. Dr. Fran told her to “stop fucking around with your synthroid, Geri, it’s not funny.” Our doctor uses the work Fuck way more than most doctors.

  229. I have nodes on my thyroid and they act just like yours do. I had a needle biopsy (not a helluva lot of fun) and there was no cancer. One node was bigger than the other and it’s the one that gives me the most trouble. My doc wanted me to have them removed (her mother had it done and was glad she did), but I’m holding out. I hope it’s nothing more than this for you, too.

  230. This really resonates for me. I have lupus and OCD… and my OCD revolves around health issues. So I completely fall apart when something health wise changes because I am convinced I’m going to die and that I have cancer. It’s slways that line where health reality and OCD meet that feels so terrifying and isolating. Because people can say it’s hypochondria but it’s not! Because I have lupus dammit! Anyway, bottom line is that it’s better to know what’s going on and get treatment or potential care then to not know. Chances are, based on your history, it is related to the autoimmune stuff. I’m a reassurance seeker, so I get it. You are adulting and doing the right thing by taking care of your body. In the meantime, stitching and knitting always help me refocus and help me stay in the moment. Get to stabbing!

  231. I have never had my thyroid removed, but am daily medications for mine. My grandmother and a friend both had theirs removed. Just have to take another pill or two for like. Grand scheme, I would rather that than cancer or something else scary.

  232. I counted out my lab work and it cost a pretty penny
    I put it in a test tube and I took it home to Jenny
    She sighed and she swore that she never would leave me
    But the devil take the thyroid for they never can be easy

    Mush-a ring dum-a do dum-a da
    Whack for my daddy-o
    Whack for my daddy-o
    There’s thyroid in the jar

  233. Sending much love and such strength as I can spare from Sweden.

    Your adulting game is on point.

  234. Sometimes thyroid problems are the hardest to detect, because many doctors brush you off as being “female’ and hysterical. I’d say you were lucky to find someone who paid attention.

    I had a hyperparathyroidectomy (whew) two years ago, when they took out one of the nodules that piggy back the thyroid, and it cleared up a whole bunch of problems that no one ever paid much attention to before. So having part or even all of your thyroid removed might not be the scariest thing that ever happened, either. And there is, of course, meds for that.

    And yes, hugely good thoughts (you’re tougher than you think, lady) and hugs if you need ’em.

  235. You, my darling, are going to be fine! That was a very, very grown-up thing to do to get it checked and because you were diligent it will all be ok. Much love from Colorado!

  236. Good thoughts, good thoughts, good thoughts!

    Bodies SUCK. It’s like they were designed to fail. 🙁 I’m sorry you have to go through this, Jenny. <3 <3 <3 from the other ass end of TX (up near Dallas).

  237. Jenny, you will be fine! My Mama had her thyroid removed when she was a young woman and other than having to take a thyroid supplement all her life she was in great health right up until she passed away at 100 years old a couple of years ago.

  238. You will be fine, I’m sure of it. My ex-wife had half her thyroid removed and she’s fine though she gets drunker faster now. Something about not being able to metabolize the booze as quickly.

    So you just might become a cheaper drunk! Money saved!

  239. Jenny, you will be ok🙂 Please try not worry too much over this. You are doing the right things. I have this very particular problem and I have the same disease as well. After much testing, my doctors put me on omperazle and that works. I no longer have these issues when I am on it. It’s a G.I. issue. You will be ok and you won’t need surgery. It is not cancer and you will definitely be able to handle it🙂 You are very good to catch it early and be seen. If you can believe it, it will be a hindrance over time than more of a fear. It will be ok.

  240. You are going to be okay. The doctors will figure this out, and no matter what, you will come through this, and you will tell us more stories about your dad and about snacks in milkbone biscuit boxes and about Hayley and etc. And we will be here loving you and doing the James Garfield Christmas Miracle and supporting Project Night Night and you and each other because of you. 💜

  242. A friend of mine had something similar, and turned out she had an enlarged gland because of mono. She is just fine, and you will be, too.

  243. This is a scary thing, no doubt, but you are doing the exact right thing and i know all will be well. My mother died young of cancer and if I find anything out of the ordinary on myself, I too decide immediately that I am filled with cancer and will be going into Chemo immediately – so I totally get the thought process. Keep reminding yourself that you are such a strong human inside and out, and the doctors will do their thing and figure it all out and it’ll all be fine. Sending you lots of warm thoughts and cyber-hugs.

  245. My doctor told me yesterday I need an ultrasound of my neck. Apparently my thyroid is also on the big side. I am also freaking out, but the truth is we are probably both going to be okay.

  246. Your thyroid is obviously in league with my employers, who decided that THE MIDDLE OF WINTER was the perfect time to gut the employee bathrooms for renovation… which means we have to use an outdoor toilet trailer (yes, that’s a “thing”) while the construction is ongoing.

    Thank you, thyroid, and bosses, for fucking up Christmastime. Except the toilet trailer has Christmas music piped in (of course it does)… is your thyroid singing holiday songs? If it is, maybe you need to get it removed. That could be really annoying come June.

    That being said – you, Jenny, are doing the wise thing by getting checked out by a doctor. Keep up the good adulting!

  247. I have lived the outcome that your anxiety is poking you about. I had thyroid cancer, I had my thyroid removed, and it all worked out fine. The treatment is surgery (you can barely see my scar) and radioactive iodine, so no yucky chemo. It’s a rough month or two going through withdrawal from your thyroid hormones and getting your meds right. You would be away from your animals for about a week while you’re radioactive. But after that, the challenge is being hyper/hypothyroid. And you’re already used to that. So, chances are that it’s just a goiter. And if the worst happens, if your anxiety is right this time, you’re still totally going to make it through okay. (feel free to contact me if you have questions about anything)

  248. My co-worker had her thyroid removed a couple of years ago. She takes thyroid meds to replace whatever the thyroid does. The majority of our office never even knew, and you can’t see her scar at all, unless you know it is there and actively look for it. The odds are in your favor, and it won’t be the end of the world if it has to be removed.

  250. “May you be safe. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you live with ease.”
    I know this is scary. I, too, have gone from one medical issue to the next. But you are getting the tests you need so you can know what you need to do to kick the shit out of this thing. Which you will! And you have all of us sending you all the good thoughts and strength we can to help.

    Happy Solstice. Tomorrow brings more light and warmth.

  251. Hey. You’re going to be ok. You’ve got an amazing support system regardless of the outcome. Excellent job adulting and getting it checked out (how does spellcheck not recognize adulting as a word?? UGH spellcheck). offers hand to hold

  252. Sending good thoughts <3
    Everything is going to work out and YOU ARE FINE!!! It's going to be okay.
    I know you like funny cat videos but I'm a dog person, so here…

    I know what a squirrel and a Burnese Mountain Dog.

  253. Been there, done that! I had have my thyroid removed because it was about an inch across. It was discovered in, of all things, a chest x-ray which apparently went up that high. The operation was a piece of cake. It left a scar on my neck but, lol, the incredibly arrogant–almost to an comic level, considerate though-made sure the scar lay in one of my neck wrinkles so it is almost invisible. In my case it was a benign growth that the doctor said ran in families. And, though they tried many tests, it wasn’t until it was out that they could say definitively that it wasn’t malignant. Best to you, Jenny. I too, worried like a fiend, and dosed myself with anti-inflammatory tea and water.

  254. All is well. What is, is. You are perfect exactly the way you are. So are we all. Tough to wrap the head around, but I love to chew on it. FYI, my husband had his thyroid removed years ago due to cancer and they called it cancer with a little ‘c’. He’s been on synthroid for years (one of the most prescribed drugs in the world) and all is well. Sending love to you, dear Bloggess!

  255. Sending you all the positive thoughts! All of them!
    Well done you, getting things checked out by doctors.
    “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.”
    hug

  256. I found out last week that I have HALF of the hemoglobin a human body needs to survive. So I go to the hospital to see if I have to have a blood transfusion and the first thing they do it…take blood. Umm…okay. Of course, being me, I made a hissing sound as soon as the nurse put the needle in my hand.
    Anyway, I’m pretty sure that if I can survive with no blood, you can survive with a weird lump. We’re tough like that. Sending you love and strength!

  257. I had growths in my thyroid that got to the point it felt like I was wearing a too tight turtleneck. The big thing to remember is if you’re thyroid level is too high for where you personally need to be it can cause anxiety. So, it’s probably also making that worse, too. A whiole lot of my other health problems got better after they removed my thyroid and my immune system lost its favorite target.

  258. Before I finally realized I had pulled a muscle in my groin cleaning out my pond in the back yard, I was sure I had crotch cancer. So if it is your thyroid and it has to be removed, you will be just fine. Lots of people are walking around without their thyroids. Thank the gods it is not crotch cancer!

  259. It’s super scary to have to wait for test results and it’s easy to imagine the worst case scenario. But it will all be okay. No matter what the problem is, there is a solution and it will all work out. Trust the process and take each moment as it comes and remember that they are just moments and won’t last forever.

    I have a recurring growth on my thyroid called a nodule and every couple of years they have to drain it so it doesn’t get big enough to cause problems like you’re experiencing. It took a LOT of tests to get to the point where they found it’s a “cold” nodule, which means it’s not messing with my thyroid function; it will just need to be drained every couple of years. I’ve had a bunch of ultrasounds (and biopsies!) on my thyroid now and I don’t like them at all, but my husband comes with me and holds my hand and it’s a little better. Find the things that make it little better and focus on those things. And hang in there!

  261. YOU’RE GONG TO BE OK. If it’s your thyroid, or not, or something bad, or not really tha bad, you’ll be ok. If you have to get something removed, then just cut the little fucker out and be done with it. Then go watch “How To Get Ahead in Advertising,” and you’ll feel much better.

  262. Sorry with respect to my earlier comment. It was half my thyroid, not the whole. The removal ended by lowering my thyroid levels and so I take a thyroid replacement. No biggie.

  263. Sending you all the good thoughts I have to spare

    I didn’t have my thyroid removed, but I did have radioactive iodine treatment many years ago which just killed my thyroid (I have Graves Disease). I didn’t end up with any cool mutant powers though, which I was a big disappointment. I was just unable to hold any babies for like two weeks…

  264. pick up a copy of Dr. Anne Myers ‘Autoimmune Solution’, it may help the Hashimoto’s. Wishing you all the best.

  265. You are adulting like a fucking BOSS!!! You show that neck lump it’s messing with the wrong motherfucker!!! Love you and you got this and sending as much good juju as possible!

  266. I’m guessing fur ball………just cough it up like all your helpers do 🙂
    Seriously, though, good thoughts coming your way and thank you for not ignoring it!

  267. Sending lots of positive energy your way – as a swallow therapist I know it’s pretty terrifying when something is messing with your breathing and swallowing, but you are doing all the right things to get it taken care of! ❤️

  268. Jenny, I had my thyroid removed. It was 10 years in October, right before I turned 40. I did have thyroid cancer, so that was the reason for removal, but I had lived with an enlarged thyroid (goiter) due to Hashimoto’s for decades. The only negative for me with surgery is that the parathyroid glands were damaged, which means my body has a hard time keeping calcium in my system. So, I take my daily thyroid pill and I take calcium pills. I’ve been taking thyroid pills on and off since I was 18. The only downside of getting older is that the number of pills I take has quadrupled due to other medical issues not related to the thyroid.

    I wish I could come down to Texas and hold your hand and let you know that you can get through this thyroid stuff and it will all be okay. The best I can do is send you a virtual hug, and if you need support, I’m here. You can DM me at Twitter under @LauraDryad if you have any questions, or just need to talk to someone who understands a bit of what you are going though.

    Sending you lots of love!

  269. Dearest Jenny, I think you are one of the luckiest people in the world to have the love and support of your fans just pour out. I read through all the wonderful comments and I wish that everyone could be as frank and honest about their fears as you are and be able to experience the genuine love and empathy humanity is capable of. With that, I wish you the best outcome, you are brave, and you will persevere.

  270. I will keep my fingers crossed for you. It will make it hard to wrap gifts, but so be it. Really though, will be thinking of you until I read your ‘All is well’ post.

  272. I had a milestone birthday yesterday and was well celebrated and loved, and I’m passing ALL of that on to you. So much love and good vibes beaming your way!

  276. Sending all the good thoughts – and congratulations on being n adult and having it checked out!

  277. My mom had her thyroid completely removed back before things were super high tech and all robo-doctors. She did well with little no complications, except for not exactly having a voice for nearly a month. (I think my dad was secretly enjoying this)
    Sending you all the good jujus!

  278. Sending all the good thoughts and vibes and anything else that will make you feel better! You are a warrior and you got this!!!

  279. Oh, Jenny, I’m sending you all the live and good thoughts!! You are definitely being very grown up to have it checked out and I’m proud of you for it! I hope it gets sorted soon so you can breathe and swallow normally again!! ♡♡♡♡♡

  280. No matter what, YOU WILL BE OKAY. You are now too important for the Universe to give up on. You’ve done too many good things and brought too many wounded people together.

    Your anxiety is understandable. Your body has been a total dick up to this point and fearing another unknown is perfectly reasonable.

    I have Hashimoto’s as well, and have not had any of my thyroid removed (at the rate I’m going I’m pretty sure it will just fall out at some point) but I am fairly certain that means ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream.

  281. Remember, it’s all going to be ok in the end, if it’s not ok right now, that means it’s not the end.

  282. *love. That was supposed to be love, not live. I’m not sure how to send live. Sorry.

  283. Proud of you for doing the v scary, yet most responsible thing and have seen your doctor. With that said, Girl, you are going to be just fine! Don’t believe anything different. You are going to be tested & everything is going to be fine. Believe it!

  285. Sending you positive thoughts! Today is the winter solstice, which means tomorrow the days will start getting longer, which means today is a magical day and therefore you will be fine!

  286. Jenny, I don’t have a lot to give at the moment (thank you, SAD), but I do have enough best wishes and happy thoughts to spare for my absolute favorite blogger. The internet (and I) would not be the same without you.

    The worst part about your situation is the not knowing; it’s scary. But you’re doing the adult thing, which is dealing with it immediately using the most appropriate medical avenues and trying your best to stay calm (though I realize that will fluctuate).

    Virtual hugs from both me and my dog.

  287. I had Grave’s disease, which was a hyperactive thyroid and looked like a huge goiter but wasn’t – also Goiter is one of those words that JUST SOUNDS DISGUSTING and GROSS and EW – anyway they couldn’t guarantee the surgery so I had to take a radioactive pill which was scary because the person giving it to me wore these like hazmat gloves and used loooong tongs to hand me the actual pill THAT I HAD TO SWALLOW!! Then I had to be isolated pretty much for a couple weeks (my kids were only like 3 years old at the time so THAT sucked a big fat rat ass, but I had to keep my plates and utensils & stuff separate, use a separate toiled & shower, no holding babies.
    To be honest it was sort of a nice little vacation AND in fact the only vacation I’ve had away from my kids in 23 years. Maybe they’ll give me another one of those pills. FINGERS CROSSED!
    Basically it just killed off my thyroid with no real drama.

    Shit, I forgot where I was supposed to be going with all this.
    YOU ARE GOING TO BE FINE! You didn’t ignore it for 3 years like I did, I promise you still have blood, and it’s most likely a little polyp or something easily removable.
    Trust me. I’m not a doctor, but I could totes play one on TV. 🙂

  288. I am sending you positive thoughts and prayers. Everything you’re feeling is perfectly normal. Scary shit is scary. It occurred to me that anxiety is an indicator of intelligence. So, you’re a fucking genius. Anyway, much love! You are such a light to us, Jenny. Let us be your light? You’re going to be okay.

  289. Sending you good thoughts. And yes, I had my thyroid removed a few years ago due to a large lump. The biopsy of lump was negative but did find a few teeny tiny cancer cells in gland. You never know what else is in there and now I get to listen to an “ I told you so” from my mother who urged me to go to doctor for lump as I was just ignoring it like you. I was able to take the dog for a walk day after surgery so it was no big deal for me,

  290. You are being SUCH a KICKASS ADULT!! I had a little lump in my breast that was cyst that went away on its own. I got a bit freaked out because my mom and aunt are breast cancer survivors. May your lump be they neck equivalent of that!!

  291. I’m new to your blog and I love it. You are going to be fine. Sending you healing thoughts and blessings!

  292. My mom always says “The Universe is unfolding exactly as it is meant to.” That usually makes me want to choke her out because WTF?!?!? But, the truth is, you’re tougher than you think you are, you’re more loved than you fear you are, you’re smarter than you tell yourself you are and you’re going to be just fine whatever may come because you can take whatever the Universe throws at you and use it to make thousands and thousands of people smile and laugh and feel not alone and that’s a Super Power! So stand up and tell the Universe to go get f*#&cked because Supe-Duper Chick has this shit handled!

  293. Thank you for putting on your big girl panties and going to the doctor. I love you and consider this your Christmas gift to me. I will be thinking good thoughts for you all day.

  295. It will all be ok. My mom had her thyroid removed and never thought another thing about it other than having to take medication every day (which I’m sure you are already doing with Hashimoto’s).
    Cheer up! I’m going for an upper GI and colonoscopy today and I’m really hoping the pooping will be over before I have to get in the car and fight holiday traffic to get to the surgery center.
    Note to self: Pack clean pants, just in case. And a diaper.
    Also – I’m nauseated and hungry all at the same time, and that is a weird combination. At least I didn’t almost pass out this time, which I did do last time. Very sincerely and heartfelt prayers were sent heavenward that I would not die on the toilet like Elvis. And also that I would not fall off and give myself a concussion and a poop fountain all at the same time.
    See? Things could always be worse!
    I will think of you, and you think of me, and both of us will be fine.

  296. My Mom had hers removed several years ago. It was an easy surgery. Easy recovery. She was 73 when she had it removed. You’ll do fine.

  297. My sister had part of her thyroid out earlier this year. It’s all ok now. Surgery is a scary proposition, but if it comes to that, I’m sure you can make it through!

  298. I’m sending you well wishes. I had the same scare in my early 20’s. It was just a mad lymph node, not sure what I did to piss it off. They removed it and I haven’t had any problems since. I have a cool scar now that I tell people I got when I was shanked in the po-po. 🙂 hang in there! You are super strong and we all love you!

  299. My love… sending you all the good juju and karma I have. This stuff is scary, but I am proud of you for taking care of you. Bodies are weird; I still have my tonsils and have bad allergies so sometimes one of my tonsils swells for a day a or two and then it goes back to normal.

  300. Several friends have mine have had their thyroids removed. No big deal. Easy surgery and recovery. One friend wore scarves for months to cover her scar, but no one else even noticed it. Sending good thoughts your way!!

  301. You are being extremely grown up right now and should be engulfed in warm hugs and good thoughts immediately!
    So hugs to you. I hope it’s is not a life changing our disabling medical thing.

  302. I can’t say if you’re going to be okay, but I can say you’re loved and cherished and respected by a lot of people you’ve never met and I am hoping things do turn out okay. I love your brain.

  303. Hang in there, Jenny! Remember, you’ve been through a TON of medical issues and survived them all; this is just another monkey wrench thrown in your works that has to be dealt with. Annoying and scary, but conquerable. I also recommend a cold gin martini or three to take the edge off and show that lump who’s still swallowing like a champ.

  304. One of my closest friends had her thyroid removed due to cancer – it took a couple of months to get her meds pinned down, but she’s good. And no cancer. You’ve got this, Jenny. Even if you think you need an adultier adult.

  305. Sending you so many good thoughts…and some baby slobber, because that shit fixes everything.♥️♥️♥️

  306. My mom, her sister, two of their cousins, my sister, and two of my cousins have all had one or more their thyroids removed. They have done remarkably well. My mom and sister would make up stories about their neck scar when it was healing.

  307. You are going to be ok. You can get through hard stuff. Look at all the hard crap you have already gotten through in your life. Some of it harder than others but still. You can do this. Also, good job at adulting and going to the dr and getting the tests etc.
    I am a Breast Cancer survivor sending my warrior strength to you! But honestly lovely you don’t need it cause you already have it!
    Love S

  308. My mother had her thyroid removed 3 years ago due to thyroid cancer. The docs told her if she was going to get cancer, that’s the kind you want to get. It’s super treatable, success rate in the 90s, (she didn’t even have to have chemo or radiation) and the recurrance rate is really low. Now she just takes a pill everyday. It was a little tricky getting the right dosage, but after that she’s been great. Even if this is thyroid, which it totally probably isn’t, you are going to be completely fine. You can totally handle this.

  309. I had my thyroid removed when I was 17. I’m 44 now and have had no problems since. Benign tumor. Scary for a 17yo girl to go through but actually wasn’t bad. No problems since.

  310. You have an awesome doctor, you are smart to go get checked out, we all want you to be okay – with a thyroid or without – and we’re all thinking good thoughts for you and your medical team!

  311. I also had a lump on my thyroid, it was benign, something like >90 percent of them are benign, so your odds are awesome. It was a quick surgery, then they taped my chin to my chest for like a while so I wouldn’t move and pull at the stitches lol so that was weird. But I went home the next morning and it’s all good. Sending you lots of good light.

  312. Thyroglossal duct cyst. Happens to me every couple of years. It’s fairly alarming, and really uncomfortable, but no big deal. You can have it removed, but I’ve been kind of meh about that.

  313. Hugs sweet Jenny! I had half of my thyroid removed when I was a teenager, and it’s not that big of a deal. Seriously. I’m the biggest wimp, so if I can do it, you can do it. Just for fun I used to point out my scar and convince guys in bars that I’d been in a knife fight. So there’s that silver lining.

  315. You will be fine. Hasimoto’s can do that. My daughter’s growth was very large. Two other family members had thyroid cAncer but years later they are fine. Another niece had the same as you are describing and had the lump removed. She is fine.

  316. Some folks (like my spouse) have all their thyroid glands (pretty sure there are only 2) removed by drinking a magic thyroid killer potion, aka., radioactive iodine. The only thing is that no one else can use the same toilet as the potion-drinker for a week because I think what happens is that the radioactivity makes the thyroids flee through the body’s exits – maybe one for each thyroid gland – and they might lurk in the toilet waiting for some non-radioactive person that they could move in with. Anyway, aside from having to pee and poop in a reserved toilet (which sounds great if you live with other people), no problems at all. If they only want to take out a piece of one, I can’t help you.

  317. I had a partial thyroidectomy at age 40 due to enlarged nodules. Lots of needle biopsies were done to determine that they couldn’t determine if they were malignant or not. I have Hashimoto’s too and that’s why he only took out the part of the thyroid with the nodules. The surgery wasn’t terrible. Sending you all the positive good thoughts that I have!

  318. Sending you lots of light & love & positive thoughts, Jenny.
    And you know it’s OK if this is not a funny post. We want to know how you’re really doing.

  319. I’m sending you amazingly good powerful vibes to help out with the neck issue. You’re winning at adulting by going to the doctor and you are setting a great example for everyone. My mom had to use radioactive isotopes to try to kill her thyroid (it was really acting up) and it was a bit odd for her, but she did great with it and is doing quite well on medicine without a thyroid. (Truthfully in her case the first dose of meds didn’t kill it so she had to go back for a 2nd dose!!! Kinda odd, but it is my mother.) I have hashimotos too which makes things interesting, doesn’t it? Hang in there, read a good book, drink some good drinks of your choice (tea, cocoa, coffee, adult beverages even) and enjoy some holiday stuff. There are a bunch of good marathons coming on tv soon. Mythbusters and Doctor Who even! Hang in there.

  320. Maybe this is why your furry family keeps stepping on your keyboard while you are trying to work- they sense your worry and are trying to be adorable to distract you and comfort you! I don’t know what your medical team will find out with the testing, but I do know you will be okay, because you literally have a 100% survival rate so far, and that is pretty impressive. Sending you hope and comfort and love and positive vibes and virtual kittens and rainbows!

  321. I had thyroid cancer and had my thyroid removed almost 5 years ago. I think the waiting for the biopsy was worse than the surgery. They did tell me at the biopsy the vast majority are benign. I wasn’t so lucky there, but haven’t had any problems since it was removed. So, worst case scenario turned out to be just fine. Hang in there.

  322. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this, especially in the midst of the holidays, which can make one feel like they’re being strangled in and of themselves. I also have Hashimoto’s disease and my symptoms have gotten worse over time. I haven’t experienced the enlarged thyroid (yet) but it’s probably coming. I say all this to try and reassure you that what you’re experiencing is par for the course with this auto-immune disorder. I hope you can find some peace of mind in the thoughts, energy, and words of all of us who love your blog and consider you a light in our lives.

  323. 5 years ago I had my overactive/enlarged thyroid zapped with radioactive iodine instead of surgery. I was literally radioactive, so my family had to move out and I couldn’t go anywhere. Friends assumed my throat would hurt so they sent me gourmet ice cream. But I felt fine and had a wonderful, introverted week at home.

  324. You all are making my anxiety about having a root canal today; on our 32nd wedding anniversary; 4 days before Christmas; with no insurance coverage for stuff like root canals; on a day the road construction crew is blasting so the short way into town is closed; if not go away, seem very, very trivial. Positive thoughts and prayers to everyone who’s struggling with stuff, especially Jenny. We’re all going to get through this with the support of this community and the other people who love us and care about us. Now I’m off on a two hour drive to the endodontist. It’ll give me plenty of time to send out healing thoughts. (Spell check says “endodontist” isn’t a word. I wonder if the doctor knows that?)

  325. I’ll be thinking of you and you are totally being a responsible adult by getting this checked out.

    This is going to sound weird but it’s one of those days where it’s kind of nice to be reminded that other people are having problems, too. My siblings and I all have various mental health issues and everyone seems to be having a hard time right now. It’s especially shitty because my sibling with schizophrenia recently had their meds changed just in time to go bonkers for Xmas! So much fun.

    Sending many many good thoughts!

  326. I had the same thing happen in 2008-2011. It was “just a goiter” in right thyroid. End of 2010 it became more of an issue and made it harder to breathe. We decided to remove right thyroid. The presurgery ultrasound showed a couple new growth on left and it became a total thyroidectomy. They took my thyroid 10 days before my wedding (Feb2011). I was fine. I wore a scarf over neck,I was able to run and laugh, and was a wonderful memory. My surgeon called me an hour or so after the wedding and asked me to come in. The mass on right side was hashimoto’s but new ones on left were cancer. It was caught so early the lady at MD Anderson told me that I shouldn’t even call it cancer. Every other doctor calls it cancer (and doesn’t deminish my experience in an attempt to “calm me down”). Since then we found a genetic mutation for thyroid cancer. My mom, my sister,and I all got it at same age. My reason for sharing all this is #1. Your fear of cancer is real but knowledge that it is the “best” of the cancers makes the situation better. #2. If it is just hashimoto’s then that is no small thing (insert inappropriate goiter joke here) and you should feel so much better afterwards. #3. Having a family history of thyroid issues gives me a unique ability to say that this will probably be something minor and the surgery will give you a scar that you can easily hide with a necklace but also inventive stories of how you got the scar are endless. Good luck and you have got this!

  328. My son’s girlfriend has thyroid issues and needs to have another surgery. She’s 21. You’re not alone. You’ll be OK. You have lots of people who love and care about you. You’re being not only responsible by getting things checked out but also brave. That’s why we love you. Thank you for all you bring to the world.

  329. You are totally being grown up. Good for you!

    I know a number of folks who had their thyroids removed (my Mom had part of hers removed). If it all goes you get to take another pill. But if just part of it goes you might not have to. You got this.

  331. Jenny, people like us with bodies that are medically strange and wonderful, have a ruogh path, so I’m sending you all my good thoughts, and am convinced that we are going to be fine no matter what.

  333. Sending healing and calming thoughts your way. And if you have to have a procedure that results in a scar, I will have to send you a necklace.

  334. My mom didn’t have hers removed but almost; she had hyperthyroidism, which they treat with radioactive iodine. But they gave her too MUCH, and burned away too much of her thyroid so she ended up with hypothyroidism (and no special powers which makes me sad). She takes medication and is totally fine… except when she runs out and forgets to get her refill for too long and her eyelashes fall out, and then i would come into the bathroom to find false eyelashes stuck on the mirror until her prescription came back in.

    Thyroids are weird.

    Good thoughts 🙂

  335. When I became pregnant with my son they discovered I had burned out one of my thyroid glands and that the other was now running the show and became enlarged. I’ve had all of the tests and even talked to surgeons about removal, but didn’t do it because it has been ok as is. That was 17 years ago and everything is still ok.

  336. A coworker of mine had part of her thyroid removed. Year or so ago, and a couple months ago they went at it again for some reason, she’s doing great and you will too!

  337. You are brave. As a fellow hypochondriac (just last week I self-diagnosed strep throat – flu – breast cancer, all at once), for me, it’s my imagination that’s the scariest. You’ve reminded me countless times that fear is a liar. Be kind to yourself. Breathe. You’ll get through this. You are loved.

  338. Modern medicine is amazing. Whatever it is, they’ll get it. And you have all the energy in the world from all of us who love you. The outcome is decided. You just have to go through the steps.

  339. I had the same issue around this time last year. Had a biopsy in January that was 99% certain it wasn’t thyroid cancer, but then around August it got bigger. Had to have surgery literally a week after I went for a checkup for a lobectomy of my thyroid. I had a cyst attached to the left side about the size of a golf ball. It was a day surgery, and the recovery was pretty uncomfortable, but I survived. It wasn’t cancer. I’m sure yours isn’t either, but I will be praying for you.

    Oh, and I can swallow a lot better now, so there’s that.

  340. It doesn’t matter if you are a hypochondriac or not. You needed to check it out carefully to make yourself feel better. And no matter WHAT it is, you will deal with it. You will. So focus on your next step, your next breath, your next smile. Leave the future to the future. Hug your family! And know you are getting tons of virtual hugs and good thoughts from Cali RIGHT NOW!!!

  341. Hey there. I had my thyroid removed in 2007. I’m on replacement hormone and we’re forever tinkering with my dose, but it’s no big deal. Tiny scar that you can’t even see. I’m glad yo7 went to your doctor. It’s definitely better to get this stuff managed as early as possible.

  342. Sending you so many good thoughts. I have several friends with thyroid issues who have had concerning weirdness pop up over the year and it has always been okay. Hang in there and hopefully it’ll all be cleared up quickly. You’ve got this- everyone is cheering for you!

  344. Hey, the great thing about us hypochondriacs is that we’ll usually never get something in an advanced state, because we go to the doctor for everything and a doc will probably catch it early.

  345. My mother, who had hyperthyroidism, had her thyroid removed. Yes, it was sometimes “challenging” to get the correct dosage of Synthroid/levothyroxine to replace the hormones associated with a functioning thyroid, but hey, it relieved a lot of other less pleasant symptoms associated with the malfunctioning thyroid. So it was still a good thing. Sending you all good thoughts for patience and healing!

  346. I had hashimotos and then it switched and went to graves disease, I had thyroid ablation where they kill it with radiation. I am feel much more stable with taking a thyroid pill than with my thyroid deciding whether it will be high or low. My niece had thyroid cancer and had it removed and then radiation and she recovered and is fine and cancer free. I think thyroids are little troublemakers and I am sure you will be fine without it.

  347. Best Prayers for your full recovery! You are totally doing the right thing by checking it out! If it’s thyroid-It’s totally OK! You will need synthetic thyroid hormone for the rest of your life, but it’s easy to take. First thing in morning on empty stomach. My thyroid quit working in my 20’s. I only knew because menstruals stopped. I was HAPPY! No more monthly mess! Mentioned to doc who was horrified that this should happen AT MY AGE. Put me on synthroid. The cycle resumed-total bummer-until it finally stopped at a more normal age of 50. Thank goodness. Still taking the synthroid-thyroid regulates A WHOLE BUNCH OF IMPORTANT STUFF IN YOUR BODY! Never had the thing removed. It’s still in there, the slacker. Hugs, prayers, best wishes coming your way. Not physically-just through the Good Vibes Network.

  348. My uncle had part of his thyroid removed in the 70s and my cousin’s husband was actually born entirely without one and they are both healthy people. Good luck!

  352. You’re gonna be just fine! You got this. It’s not cancer. It’s just your awesomeness making a bump because there’s so much of it. You. Are. Going. To. Be. Fine. Sending you lots of love and strength and good thoughts!

  353. You will be okay!
    You are brave for getting it checked out!
    Sending you soft Rolly pats
    xoxoxo

  354. You’ll be okay. You are loved and cared for and you’ll be okay. Because you went to the doctor like an adult and that’s called taking care of yourself and that’s a good thing.

    You will be okay.

  355. Positive energy, tons of love, many compassionate hugs, and a listening ear being sent to a person who is not only being very adult about all this, but is setting a good example for others who might be putting off medical care.

  357. It might be my own hypochondria, but I like to think about worst case scenario and whether I can deal with that–then the actual issue which is nearly always must less dire seems so much more manageable. So, my wife had thyroid cancer 30 years ago. They took it out, she takes synthroid. All is well. no biggie. And thyroid cancer has a 98% survival rate, so even if it IS cancer, you’re still good. I know this is scary. Sending good thoughts for a much less dramatic outcome, but in any case, you’re going to be OK.

  358. You are being so very grown up. So much more grown up than me. I found a lump in my armpit a month ago and I’ve refused to see the GP. My mom is coming Sunday, so I’ll see the GP while she’s here, or at least that’s my excuse for not going so far.

  359. So…I had my thyroid out a few years ago – there was a smallish benign tumor which was hiding an even smaller malignant cancer. But it turns out that thyroid cancer is one of the least “bad” cancers to have…I get blood drawn twice a year or so to make sure I don’t have a small recurrent mass somewhere, but they don’t tend to do really bad things. The surgery had me overnight at the hospital, and I’ve got a 2-inch scar in my neck fold. No biggie. I have a few friends who have needed treatment with radioactive iodine for overactive thyroid tumors…it didn’t give them super spidey powers, sadly…whatever happens, you’ll be ok!

  360. Sounds like you are doing exactly the right thing. Even if it is something serious you’ll still be A-OKAY…because you are a strong person. You really are…let that in.

  361. I’ve had Hashimoto’s for over 20 years (probably much longer, but that’s when it was diagnosed) My thyroid has enlarged and shrunk (to the point the ultrasound tech got the doctor to view it during the procedure. It was so small it was hard to identify) I still have whatever BB size thing is left. I’m doing fine.

  362. You ARE OK, you were a TOTALLY responsible grown up to get it checked out. And I haven’t had my thyroid removed, but my mom did & she was fine. My best friend did and she had to switch types of salt & take thyroid medication but she’s fine. And, if you do have to have it taken out, you’ll end up in the hospital (maybe even outpatient) which means lots of sleep and people feeding you and then– once you get home– you explain that you CLEARLY can’t do any housework because your thyroid hurts. It’s that “ghost limb” syndrome, and you’d explain more about it, but you’d clearly begin to cry & we don’t want that, so the best thing you can do, Victor, is just finish the laundry and ironing, mop the floors, fix dinner, and let me lie here and adjust to my new thyroid-less life. slight gulp and sniffle.

  363. All the spoons and hugs to you, wonderfully whacky lady!! No idea if you’re a hypochondriac but you are definitely adulting by getting this checked out. If they have to remove your thyroid, you may need to take a daily pill – my mom’s done that most of her adult life. No biggie!!

  364. Sadly I know exactly how you are feeling, as I am going through much the same thing right now- only my lump is in my breast. Had a mammogram and ultrasound last week and biopsy is scheduled for the day after xmas. One minute I am petrified and the next I try to tell myself that i’m over reacting and it’s nothing. I haven’t told my four (grown) kids yet – didn’t want to ruin their holidays. I am just so nervous and, like you, just wish someone could tell me I’m going to be okay. I will be thinking of you and hope we both get the outcomes we are looking for. Sending you a hug and good thoughts.

  365. I am much the same as you, in regards to my immediately deciding that I have cancer when I find a lump or have a headache. That said, you are doing the right thing by going to the doctor and having everything checked out. I will never call you a hypochondriac, because you know your body, and you know when something isn’t right. Not to mention that you don’t like to go to the doctor, so if you do, something’s up. I send you tons of “you’ll be ok” vibes, as well as some deep breaths!!

  368. You sound so much like the voice in MY head that it’s scary! I don’t think you’re being a hypochondriac at all—this is something anyone should get checked out. I have a very large nodule on my thyroid and have had it for years. My endocrinologist (one of the best in the U.S.) does ultrasounds and occasional biopsies to make sure all is well. I still have my thyroid and there’s been no mention of having it removed. I think in the beginning it did feel uncomfortable and almost like choking but honestly I haven’t noticed it for years and it’s still the same size. I also have Hashimotos.

    Sending you lots of love and hugs today. I know how hard this is. I am going through a period where I pretty much am afraid I’m going to die every day (late peri menopausal anxiety), so I really get this. One thing that has helped me to no end is listening to guided meditations on Insight Timer. It’s free. Thank you so much for all you do and for being you—you’re a true bright spot in the world.

  369. I’ve had my thyroid removed and it wasn’t terrible. No more so than any surgery. It’s been 34 years, and I take a pill every day. That’s all there was to it. You’ll be fine!

  370. I have Hashimoto’s and have had a number of biopsies, but no removal so far. You are on top of things, so I know you will be fine. Hardest part for me is figuring out the meds and what else is affected by having Hashimoto’s. Sending you speedy resolution thoughts!

  371. This is not hypochondria; this is you taking care of your health. It is DEFINITELY WORTH IT.

  373. I have Graves’ disease and didn’t have my thyroid removed and honestly there are days I wish I did have it removed. Stupid autoimmune issues! Hang in there it’s gonna be okay.

  374. I will tell you what I tell my daughter when her anxiety starts to rear it’s ugly head…Everything is going to be ok. Which just means that you are loved and things will happen and you will get through it. I’m sending my super vibes!!

  375. I went through this. At last count I had 9 nodules. One got big enough to be kind of noticeable. Ultrasounds and biopsies, all cystic and benign. Unless you have a family history of thyroid cancer, dont freak out.
    I got through it by calling them my neckbabies. I posted ultrasound pics and named them and planned a baby shower. Named the big one EpiGladys. EpiGladys and the Polyps.

  376. Sometimes I think it would be easier to just not have a thyroid instead of having one that works half-assed. You might end up feeling better than ever! Merry Christmas and thank you for all the laughter.

  378. I have a low thyroid, so I take the synthetic thyroid medication to ensure I’m getting the right amount daily. the end result was feeling better & losing some weight, but my sense of taste is a bit crazy now. sims things I used to love now tastes horrible. some csus I can eat certain things, but can’t the next day due to taking odd.
    I hope things turn out for the best, hang in there 😊

  379. I had my thyroid removed (one half at a time, my first doc was an IDIOT) and it’s outpatient surgery. Easy-peasy. Hurts way less than having your wisdom teeth out.
    Like any surgery, you’re gonna get a list of everything that COULD go wrong, because the medical community strongly believes in CYA. It will sound very scary. Pretty much all of it is one-in-a-million type stuff, tho.
    ANNOUNCEMENT: DO NOT ACCEPT A PRESCRIPTION FOR GENERIC SYNTHROID (Levoxil) because many, many tests have shown the efficacy varies between batches and manufacturers. Your insurance will want you to. If you have a good endocrinologist, he WON’T write it. Bite the bullet, pay for brand name Synthroid, be safe and well.
    I’m proud of you for taking care of this. Email if you want to talk.

  380. My grandfather had his thyroid removed when he was a young man. He lived to be 96 and was healthier than me right until a back tumor snuck up on him and killed him. He was also very slender. Even if it was thyroid cancer, I’m pretty sure that’s about the most no big deal cancer out there. Cousin’s fiancee had it. He is totally fine. But it’s probably not even that. I can’t count how many times I have convinced my own self that I had cancer and it turned out to no big deal.

  381. I had a huge nodule on the left side of my thyroid. Anytime I was sick with respiratory stuff it felt like I was being lightly choked. They did 2 rounds of needle biopsies that were inconclusive as well as a genetic profile of the mass that was also inconclusive before finally just taking the thing out already. Surgery was this past Thanksgiving. My throat hurt from the breathing tube more than anything after the surgery. The incision hurt some but, seriously, I slept for a week, and then was at 1/2 speed for a week, and am pretty much fine now. There is this ugly scar that I am told will mostly look like a neck fold in a few months. For now it looks like the little brother of Mr Sweet from Doctor Who.

  382. I had my thyroid “removed” by swallowing some sort of radioactive pill. It killed it, painlessly, except I had to avoid people, pets, and metal silverware for a few days. Except for my daily thyroid pill, which gets out of whack every few years, I’ve had no adverse effects. Hope your situation is solved as simply.

  383. You are not a hypochondriac, you are going to be fine, this is why you’ve gone to the doctors. You’ll get it all figured out, maybe have some neckbabies (thank you Stephanie for that phrase!), and just think of the fun the cats will have stepping on your throat! Meanwhile, know that you are loved and good things will happen and you have a lovely family to help you cope. Sending healing vibes and banishing thoughts to that pesky neckbaby!

  386. I always think the worst case scenario when I notice something is off. Learned to do like you and get it checked out, even if I’m terrified the whole time. Stuart McLean, a brilliant storyteller, created a character named Dave. Dave is a hypochondriac and “Occupies his body the way a nervous flyer occupies a plane.” Spot on. You will be OK. Your Blogess family will be with you in spirit at your appointments. You are not alone, you are being an adult and you will be OK.

  388. I love, love, love your self-care!
    You noticed a outlier. You did not go into denial. You are asking the right questions of the right people- family, medical experts who are going to help you. You are doing all the right things.
    Whatever this turns out to be, you are protecting your self as a person and who you are as a beloved family member to others who are invested in you. At every point, you are making noble and good choices. I greatly admire your strength of character!
    My own thyroid is- problematic. I think it must be from a life as an autistic person who attracted predators. I was always frightened and stressed and I just wore it down. These days I take a thyroid supplement but I wake up choking, too.
    In January I finally get new insurance and will have a primary care provider to coordinate my care rather than bored stranger-specialists who tell me not to eat so many carbs and send me a huge bill.
    Thank you for showing me how this is done.

  389. I tried to click on Like under Jesse’s post, and got a dialogue box asking for my email address; when I entered my email address I got this response: User does not exist. Funny, I thought I did… In any event, dear bloggess, I endorse Jesse’s remarks.

  390. ALL the good thoughts flying to you! Normal-shmormal, who needs it?! You’re doing the right thing in getting it checked out, and we will all be here for you if you need to have any bits removed.

  391. Sending you all the positive vibes I have. You are not a hypochondriac and you are doing the grown up thing by getting it checked out. Everything will be ok.

  392. I have Hashimoto’s as well. I haven’t gotten to the point of removal or meds yet. I just had a breast MRI that showed an indeterminate mass in my right breast and a nodule in my thyroid. I knew about the thyroid nodule, I’ve been dealing with it for years and it’s been benign. I now have to worry about the breast as my sister has breast cancer. She’s panicking for both of us. I don’t want to adult anymore.

  393. Jenny I’m sending you good thoughts. You’re being a very responsible adult taking care of this. I relate having chronic illnessess that I would like to put my head in the sand about. You’ll get through this, and your tribe will be here waiting with you.

    P.s. I just got my calendar this morning. Love it!!

  395. Good thoughts and love to you. You are doing the right thing by having it checked out and we are all here for you. My Daughter-in-law, and several friends of mine have all had their thyroid removed, and for them it took away some of the “weird” ailments they would get from time to time, they all take medication to simulate what the thyroid does and they are all well.

  396. All my lumps and bumps (and there’s been a bunch) have turned out to be benign. I have some hellacious Anxiety, so my anticipatory angst was the worst part. And, like you, I tend to practice benign neglect as my default mode. Good job, adulting with this. All will be well. You will be well. This friend in Oregon is cheering you on!

  398. You are so cool. I should probably say that more here because you are. Whatever this is, I know you WILL prevail!

  399. Hi Jenny –

    Had my thyroid removed in 2010 and a lot of my strange symptoms disappeared at the same time. I don’t miss it a bit. I take a tiny pill every morning that works way better than my stupid thyroid ever did. So, better living through chemistry!

    Love to you and ALL the good thoughts coming your way.

  400. Sending you tons of love and strength and health <3
    I found a small lump in my cat’s throat, too. I’m taking him to the vet soon. I think it might just be a lipoma (from my internet research) but it’s still scary.
    You’ll get through this. Gandalf (my cat) will also get through this.
    Whatever it is. You have all of the support. xo

  401. You will be fine. I promise. I had my thyroid removed in 2010. I have to take Synthroid every day for the rest of my life, but it’s a tiny easy pill. My thyroid was damaged from radiation therapy during The First Cancer of 1995 so I’ve been on the Synthroid for ages. By the time they took the whole thing out during The Second Cancer of 2010 it was a shriveled little raisin. You probably have a nice juicy kumquat in there, but no matter what, taking it out is easy compared to the shit show of other maladies your body has done to you. I promise. 😘❤️😊🙏

  402. WOBBLY CATS!

    You sound like you need a distraction. I’m sending you hugs and positive thoughts, but in the meantime have you heard of the wonders of wobbly cats?

    If the mother has distemper while pregnant, some or all of her kittens may be born with cerebellar hypoplasia. Basically they wobble when they walk. The severity can vary, and most kittens with it were just put down until very recently.

    These cats are wonderful pets. They have the attitude and love and wonderfulness of regular cats, but don’t jump up on the counters! They are also great examples to have around because they don’t give a shit about being wobbly, it’s just life.

    One of the first kittens we fostered was a wobbly cat. Since then we’ve adopted two more and of the many other kittens we’ve fostered for the Saskatoon SPCA, a few of those were wobbly too! They found great homes.

    Here is a video of our two boys being wobbly at each other:

    Here’s one of our wobbly fosters, Peanut, playing:

    This video always makes me happy sniffle. We were fostering a “normal” kitten, Gypsy, at the same time as Peanut, the wobbly cat. Here’s Gypsy playing all over the place with a paper ball, then at the end she GIVES IT TO PEANUT so she can play too. OMG.

  403. You’ve got this! I went through a similar experience and ended up having most of my thyroid removed. It was not awful, I promise 🙂 Sending you love and good thoughts <3

  404. Good thoughts and well wished for you! Also, very GOOD on going to the doctor, it’s not always fun or easy to have to be a grown up. Sometimes, I wish I could be 5 again, and then I remember adolescence!
    I hope everything goes well, and that your imaginary friend learns the difference between hugs and strangling you!!! (((HUGS))))

  405. Zen hugs to you. I won’t tell you not to worry because that would pointless. Try having more liquids, I recommend margaritas.

  406. Oceans of good thoughts. You are more than OK, you are actually terrific. Even if you weren’t before, you are now because of the huge amount of energy coming your way from your tribe.

  410. You are going to be alright, Jenny! I’m sending many happy thoughts and well wishes your way! Merry Christmas!

  411. You have the largest prayer (or “good thoughts”, if you’re not religious) circle in the world! Of course you’ll be OK! Not even the supreme being wants to piss off Jenny’s peeps! And I’ve knocked on wood so as not to jinx you. Do you know how hard it is to type with your fingers crossed? WAY hard.

  412. Loads of good thoughts for you!
    You are being an adult by getting it checked out – way to go! I’m more of the hide my head in the sand type so kudos for getting up the nerve to go to the doctor!
    It will be all right – you have a wonderful support system so no matter what the end result is, you have so many people around you who love and support you that you will get through anything.
    Many, many hugs to you!

  413. No thyroid gal here and it’s going to be fine. I had Graves and Hashi’s (what can I say, I’m an overachiever) and my thyroid was basically a mass of scar tissue that had completely displaced my esophagus by the time I had surgery.
    It is scary but it will be okay, I promise.

  414. My mom has Hashimoto’s Disease too & it can sometimes be quite the dick, but she’s otherwise healthy & happy. I’m sending you good vibes & praying for your overall health & well-being. Hang in there! You have an army of fantastically lovable weirdos behind you & we all have your back! Stay awesome lady!

  415. Jenny, you and your family will be in my thoughts as you go through this.
    You’ve been very proactive and pretty damned responsible about this. Keep it up.
    …My father had his thyroid removed a decade ago. He was pretty good at milking for sympathy, but even he couldn’t make it out to be as bad as having his tonsils removed…
    You’ll be fine, even as a solid. Don’t freak out too much.
    And, please remember to keep us informed as you improve.
    We are here for you.

  416. I also have Hashimoto’s, and this last summer noticed a lump at the base of my neck. After much poking, prodding, and scanning it was determined to be benign. You’re not a hypochondriac! This definitely needs to be checked out.

  418. Sending you good thoughts and hopes that you’ll know something soon! Waiting is a bitch!

  419. Jon Kabat-Zinn says something like, the fact that we are still bere means that there is more right than wrong.
    That thought usually helps me get my brain into a parking space; then I can get out of it and walk around for a while.

  421. My best friend had some of her thyroid removed when she was a kid, and she’s 40 now and doing fine. She’s also a lesbian, but I don’t think it’s related to the thyroidectomy. Correlation doesn’t equal causation, and all that. I’m sending tons of good thoughts for a quick diagnosis, healing and restoration of your breathing and swallowing abilities!

  422. (((Hugs)))) and hope. I hope the docs figure it out quickly and it’s something that responds well to treatment. You are being very wise and brave and beautiful

  424. And by Gibes I mean vibes unless you’d prefer gibes in which case I can send those too :p

  425. Lots of good thoughts, and hugs your way, Jenny. I’m sorry you’re going through this, and I truly hope everything will be alright.

  426. Sit down now and drink a large glass of water. In times of stress we tend to forget to drink water. You will survive this…you have a mission in life. A born humorist who makes many many people laugh. It will be ok

  427. Absolutely sending good thoughts your way! You are definitely being a good adult to get this checked out! Good luck!

  428. My sister had part of her thyroid removed (half, I guess?) years ago and she’s fine! You’re going to be fine!!

  429. It’s very easy to say, “ Don’t worry.” But I know you can’t help but BE concerned. It is, after all , your neck. It’s connected to a lot of good parts. But trusting your doctor and the medical professionals in charge of your health is a big step in the right direction. They are there to help you and have your best interest at heart.
    You are so blessed I’m so many ways. You have a loving family and a network of concerned people who care about your well being. Not only because you have the gift to make us laugh at situations you find yourself in but also ourselves. We all have demons , fears, terrors, doubt but you , kind person, have helped us pull our heads out of our butt holes to see we are not the only ones dealing with issues. Thank you! We’re in your corner, Jenny!

  430. Lots of positive thoughts and hugs. It is good you are getting it checked out. And you NEVER have to apologize for not being funny.

  431. My mom had most of her thyroid removed over 30 years ago. Maybe 40 years, not sure. She’s got this nifty scar on her neck. Sometimes she’ll tell people she tripped and fell on barbed wire. I tell people that she escaped a murderer because why not? It looks like someone tried to slice her neck. Well, I guess they didn’t just try they Did slice it. Anyway, she’s been on thyroid meds since then and seems to be fine. They probably have less invasive options now tho, so no neck slice scar for you. 😕

  432. You’re absolutely right to get it checked out. You definitely not being a hypochondriac. Both my ex-husband and wife had their thyroids removed due to thyroid cancer. They each take Synthroid daily and do just fine, thank you very much. Sending love, light, and prayers to you! You’re gonna be fine!

  433. If you want to keep your thyroid in a jar, don’t get it removed at University of Connecticut medical — one of the waivers a friend had to sign said that THEY get to keep anything they remove from your body. Harrumph…

  434. Hi Jenny,
    I had the left half of my thyroid removed last week. It was a long and terrifying couple of months leading up to the surgery: ultrasound, inconclusive biopsy, molecular testing, consultations with surgeons, panic attacks, pretty much all the stages of grief wondering if it was cancer (anger was a big stage, with so many people saying, “don’t worry, thyroid cancer is a good cancer!”). The good news is the surgery wasn’t too bad (I still feel like I’m being strangled, but apparently that feeling fades away over several weeks). The bad news is it’s cancer. The good news is that like the surgery got it all. (I have to have regular ultrasounds and bloodwork to monitor stuff, of course, so there’s still plenty of anxiety.) The majority of thyroid cancers are “easily” treatable with a high success rate. So. You can’t help but worry. I get that. But try not to worry too much, because if it is cancer, statistics are on your side, and of course it’s not necessarily cancer! Lots of people have their thyroid out for other causes. Stay strong and reach out for support (there are thyroid support groups out there, or just reach out to those of us here who have been through something similar).
    Best of luck to you,
    Rebecca

  435. All my positive thoughts and prayers are headed your directions and yes, you are being a good grown-up. So many people love you. Also, my aunt and 3 cousins have had part or all of their thyroid removed. They are all thriving and doing great. This is nothing, and even if it’s a little bit more, you got this! If you can write with cats, thyroid is nothing 🙏🙏🙏🙅

  437. Sending you SO much good energy and love and applauding your grown-upness in getting this checked out. It’s going to be ok.

  438. Oh, I know this sounds weird and strange but I think of you every time I see a dead raccoon on the side of the road ( or an opossum, or squirrel, rodent, etc…). In a nice way. Not creepy.

  440. Do not let negative thoughts enter your mind. You are a healthy, wonderful woman and all will be okay. Keep remembering there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Thoughts and prayers are with you today and always.

  441. My aunt had her thyroid removed years ago, and it took a few weeks to get her synthroid dosage right afterwards. But now she’s awesome. No issues.

  442. Years ago I had a lump in my neck. Freaked me out. They did a biopsy and it turned out to be an active salivary gland. That’s it. Nothing cancerous, just an overactive spit gland that decided to pop up ominously like a lump. It must have taken the hint because after they poked it with a sharp stick, it left. Good riddance to suspicious lumps!

  443. I’m sending lots of good vibes your way! SO many vibes, you can blame me if there’s a little earthquake, which will take your mind off of your hopefully minimal medical problem. I know a couple of people who have been through thyroid removal (or professional throat slitting, as I like to think of it) and they still talk a mile a minute. Cat purrs are supposed to heal you, so hold the cats up to your neck, like a scarf but only for the front and it tries to escape when you stop petting it.

  444. My husband had his thyroid removed about 20 years ago. He needs to take meds every morning, and he can’t have caffeine, but he is otherwise absolutely healthy and fine (other than being somewhat deranged on account of being married to me). I know this is scary – but it will be okay.

  445. I have my thyroid still, but it was radiated long ago and doesn’t work anymore. I have Grave’s disease and I’ve learned that auto-immune diseases make everything more complicated.

    My mom had a tumor in her neck and had it removed – no long term problems and her doctor said it’s quite common in women… typical that women get so lucky, right?

    Sending love across the internet – you’ve got this. 🙂
    Besides, maybe one of these times the next doctor you see will be THE Doctor…? If so, See the universe for all of us, okay?
    😉

  446. I’ve been on synthroid for years because my thyroid is lazy. You get used to it. Not the lazy thyroid but taking a pill every day because of it. Also my dad had thyroid cancer and had his thyroid removed. He’s just fine. It’s been over 20 years. Sending good thoughts.

  447. My wife has Hashimoto’s and had a total thyroidectomy about 4 years ago. The nodules kept growing after years on monitoring, but came back suspicious on a biopsy. She was able to reduce her meds after the surgery. It was a little rough getting the dosage right, but things seem to be at an equilibrium now.

    Oddly enough, out of the blue I discovered I had thyroid cancer by total accident in July of this year. I got my thyroid removed in September. If they advocate to remove it,I suggest finding a ENT surgeon who performs a lot of thyroidectomies. Sounds like a no-brainer, but seems to make a lot of difference in the outcome. My surgery probably lasted less than an hour, where some take 90 minutes to 5 hours.

    Heck, I had surgery on a Monday and went to a wine tasting on the Friday, whereas a friend who had the same surgery a couple of months prior had a longer surgery and recovery.

    #GoodLuck!

  448. My grandmother had her thyroid removed. She had to take thyroid replacement meds after, but she felt SO MUCH BETTER once it was out and her body was properly regulated. Hope this helps.

  449. My sister had hers removed and has been gleefully swallowing and breathing for years since. Like regularly and many times a day without stopping! It took some time to get her synthetic thyroid dose just right but she’s doing great now. Way happier than before when her thyroid was drunk with power and being a giant lumpy crap biscuit in her neck. So glad to have that jerk forcibly ejected from the neck party for good.

  450. Sending you lots of LIGHT. You are being a grown up and it is natural to imagine the worst. SO, also natural to hope for the best

  451. Not only will you be fine, if you DO have to have your thyroid removed you can keep it in a jar and give it a name (Thy, the annoyed, destroyed employed and most certainly enjoyed ROID) . Your tribe can make jokes about how you broke your thymen or we can call you the ThyMaster , Spare Thy Roid, Spoil Thy Child,

    You’ve Got This Jenny!

  452. Sending you all kinds of good thoughts! It will all be ok. <3 I have Grave’s disease (or had, it’s in remission), which is the opposite of Hashimoto’s; I had too much thyroid, and it made me feel awful until I got on medication, and when it kicked in I felt better than I’ve ever felt before. In fact for about two years my depression went away almost completely, and I don’t know if it was because of the medicine or something else, but it was like a miracle. I can’t promise miracles like that if you have yours removed but who knows? It would be better to have no thyroid but be able to breathe and swallow in any case. I have a friend who had hers removed and all went well with her; I’m sure it will go well for you too. 🙂 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Oops my cat was lying on my keyboard and she added those pluses with her head. I’ll just leave those there. 🙂

  453. Lots of good vibes heading in your direction. You got this.

    Well done on the responsible adulting in getting it checked out. Very sensible. It’s unlikely to be anything serious and judging by the comments having it out isn’t too onerous. Good luck!

  455. Of course I’m sending good healing and comforting thoughts! I don’t have Hashimoto’s but do have an insufficient amount of T-3 so it’s like the opposite of Hashimoto’s but not the Grave’s disease kind. Treatment is the same and have had the ultrasounds and punctures and biopsies, all to tell them what they already figured. Be well! Hang tight, Honey. YOU WILL BE FINE!!

  456. Sending you all the best wishes and LOTS of good thoughts. I had Graves disease (kind of the opposite of Hashimotos) and had my thyroid removed about 15 years ago. The surgeon said that there was a good wrinkle in my neck, that he could use for the surgery. He was right! The scar is hardly visible. And my body felt better right away. The synthroid is easy to take, with no side effects.

  457. You’ll be fine! You’re doing the right thing by getting it checked!

    For myself, it’s very reassuring to see everyone else’s positive comments about dealing with thyroid issues – I’ve recently been told something is wrong with mine, so I’m just starting down the path of testing towards a diagnosis. It’s probably going to turn out to be something minor and easily treated, but I work in a plaintiff’s medical negligence law firm and have seen so many horror stories that I’ve developed a sort of hypochondria about everything. But, seeing so many stories about dealing with it makes it all less scary. Thank you all!

  458. Sending you lots of positive vibes. I’ve been dealing with a “mass” in my abdomen, so I know how scary it is. Just got some good results today, so I can tell you it’s not always worst case scenario (even if your brain tries to tell you otherwise). Hugs and I’m sure you’ll be okay.

  459. I don’t know if you’ll get down this far in the comments, but I do want to reassure you that thyroid surgery is not bad. I was diagnosed with an enlarged thyroid (they used to call them goiters) in my 20’s. I’ve been taking Synthroid ever since. Over time the gland kept increasing, so I had a needle biopsy which showed it was not cancer. More years pass, then the goiter was pressing on my esophagus, so I finally had it removed. I was 37. Still taking Synthroid and will forever. Funny story though, I thought they had removed both lobes and told every doctor after that. A couple years ago a new doc said my thyroid was enlarged. I said I didn’t have one. Of course the doc was right, it turns out they had only removed the right lobe. My PC doc is monitoring my Synthroid dose, but otherwise it is not causing any trouble (yet? Remains to be seen). I’m 68 now.
    Weird factoid about me: I’ve had 14 surgeries for various defective body parts (except for the C-section that gave me our daughter) and thank the universe every day that medicine is advanced enough to rebuild me. Good luck, Jenny. The odds favor a benign growth, so I’d concentrate on that. Why waste time worrying about something that hasn’t happened yet and you have no control over anyway?

  460. I had a multi modular goiter (not as sexy as it sounds!) for years. I had ultra sounds yearly to check on changes. Eventually I had a needle biopsy and which was inconclusive. My endocrinologist and I discussed it and decided to have it removed. I was in my early forties at the time. It’s an overnight stay at the hospital and not particularly painful afterwards. I was tired for a couple of weeks from the anesthesia and figuring out the proper dosage of thyroid meds. It’s several years down the road now and finally figured out a dosage of levothyroxine that works well for me. I am glad I had it done when I did, when I was reasonably young, and before it could progress into something more ominous. You’ll be fine Jenny. The world is a much better ace with you in it!!

  461. I had my thyroid removed when I was 18…30 years ago. It was fine. I take the little pill every day and I’ve not had any issues. I totally understand the anxiety, but you will be fine! It’s just annoying to deal with.

  462. My best friend just had her thyroid removed about 10 days ago. She said the surgery was easy and she is already fully recovered other than a bit of pain when she coughs. So if you need yours put it isn’t a completely terrible experience. Proud of you for being on top of this and getting it checked out!

  463. Sending you all positive thoughts that everything will be fine. By going to the doctor to have it looked after, you’re doing the adult thing and if anything is actually wrong, they can look after it promptly before it gets serious. I know this because my Dad never hesitated going to the doctor if anything was abnormal; he had health problems that should have taken him from us when he was in his 40s and because he was careful, he was with us for an extra 40 years. So good for you! Since you already have Hashimoto’s syndrome, having your thyroid removed won’t be a big deal for you (well, other than the discomfort part of any surgery!) and you’ll do just fine. Hang in there and use this as an excuse to spoil yourself with pampering!

  464. Sending positive thoughts. I had a friend who had her thyroid removed. She had to take medication and had to dress warmly but she’s still alive 30 years later so it’s not as bad as you are imagining.

  466. I was having trouble swallowing so felt around my neck and discovered a large lump – Hashimoto’s. Thyroid meds shrank it some. Maybe you need your meds upped? Thinking of you!

  467. 1) Sending good thoughts. 2) Sending more good thoughts that this will work itself out soon. 3) Won’t stop until all is well. Much love from you friend you’ Never met in Nebraska.

  468. Sending you positive thoughts! You are such an inspiration reminding people that they are not alone, that its okay to be unique. You inspired me to start my own blog discussing my mental health, hopefully more will follow suit and the conversation will continue to grow. Be well!

    https://darktalesproject.com/

  470. Jenny!
    Don’t worry, you’re going to be ok!
    Many years ago I had the same problem. Two nodules, one in each thyroid lobe.
    One of them was pressing on my throat and giving me the SAME anxiety as you’re having!
    I had that lobed removed – excellent surgeon – gruesome scar. Scar is not so bad now – but other than aesthetics not a bad experience. I still have the other nodule, but it’s not cancerous. Interestingly, my mother has the same set of nodules but never noticed them and they haven’t caused her any problems. Granted, we haven’t had any function problems, like your hashimoto’s, but even when there is thyroid cancer, it’s easily treatable. It doesn’t travel like other cancers so if you’re gonna get cancer they say it’s the best kind to get. But I’m thinking you’ll be fine !
    xoxoxo 😘 michelle

  471. so i’ve been nuts since I turned 40. Anxiety and all the weird physical symptoms that go along with it. Since Thanksgiving of this year, the nervousness has moved into my chest. Almost like having butterflies in your stomach, but its happening in the middle of my chest. I finally went for an EKG this morning, and i have totally normal heart rhythms. So, as expected it’s all in my head and not my heart. Which is great. and Not great, since I’ve been an anxious jumpy mess for the past 6 weeks. ANY WAYYYYYYY- my point is, your posts REALLY help me out to not feel like a total idiot. AAANNNDDDD, since my test came back great today I am sending you good JUJU that yours does as well. ** oh and one dr friend said the chest flutters could be my galbladder!! wouldn’t that be someting!?** #fallingapartinmy40s #loveyoujenny

  472. Adding good thoughts for you on top of the very large pile you already have. You are doing the right thing and it’s scary and crappy but you will survive. Gladiator Jenny will slay the beast, it’s just that the battle is ugly.

  473. My Mom lost her thyroid very young and never had a problem. Lived into her 80’s. She didn’t even take the replacement pills! I am very glad you did the grown up thing, because it will all be taken care of!

  474. I work with two thyroid-less people: one is as stupid as a rock and she seems to be doing perfectly fine. The other is an incredibly smart, talented, warm, generous scientist and manager, and she is too busy to notice her thyroid is missing. You will be fine. You are not a hypochondriac, but a grown up doing the right thing. The tests will be ickier than the finale. It will be ok.

  475. I had my thyroid removed about a year ago and it was a piece of cake! I had Hashimotos along with nodule growths. We tried less invasive options but eventually decided to remove the whole dang thang! You will be just fine!

  476. We’re going to wish you well and positive vibe you into alrightness but if your thyroid needs to come out, ask for the natural thyroid derived from …I think it’s pigs, as opposed to the chemical synthroid brand. I have several friends with thyroid issues and they all struggled with weight gain and balancing their hormones because the synthroid version only replaces one chemical, I think it’s T4. When they went on the natural one, they were able to lose weight and balance their hormones better because it provided a more “full-range” of thyroid chemicals. Or something. I don’t know exactly but they all swear by it and wish they’d been on it from the beginning and avoided the 50 pound weight gain.

  477. I had my thyroid removed several years ago, and while I definitely didn’t enjoy it, mostly because the anesthetic makes me nauseated, and I hate that more than anything else, other than that it was a few days of discomfort, and now I’m fine and have to take artificial thyroid hormone. But it wasn’t that horrible, and I’m a big baby, so I know you’ll do great even if you need surgery. Plus I quit smoking when I had the surgery! Yay!

  478. Hi Jenny. You. Are. Normal. And awesome.

    My mom, and her mom, and my best friend have all had their thyroid removed. My mom’s symptoms were EXACTLY what you have described. All three women were just fine afterwards and still are. x

  479. I had my thyroid removed a year and a half ago. I had the biggest nodule that the surgeon at Johns Hopkins had ever seen (but he was pretty young, soooo…) The nodule was only on one side and they gave me the option of keeping half or having the whole thing removed. If you only have part removed, your thyroid might make still make enough hormone for your body and you won’t need to take meds daily. I decide to have the whole thing removed, because if it ended up that my thyroid didn’t make enough and I would be on the meds anyway, I didn’t want to end up having the same surgery again if I got another nodule in the future. It take a while to work out how much of a dose you need to be on and that’s a little pain, but once you do figure it out, it’s amazing how much better you feel! I was lethargic and just felt like poop and now I only feel like that because of our president.

  480. I’m sending good thoughts and positive energy your way. I have hypothyroid disorder, but I have not had my thyroid removed. Everything will work out fine. 🙂

  481. We do thyroidectomies for pets at my work. They go home the next morning and seem their usual happy selves after. If that helps? ♥️

  482. You’ve already done the hardest part; going to the doctor. So many people deny the possibility of a problem by just not doing anything, and that’s the worst thing to do.

    Be comforted that your doctor is taking your concern seriously. She’ll help you figure it out (it’s really not likely to be cancer, it spite of what WebMD will say about ANY symptom, including a broken toe!).

    I’m not trying to minimize your stress or concern, but you’ve told us that depression lies. It does. But anxiety lies AND exaggerates.

    If worrying motivates you to positive action, worry a little. But if the worry is hurting you, do anything that makes you feel good (anything safe, that is), and know that you have strong network of support to help you through this (and anything else).

    I know that this won’t stop your anxiety, but remember that anxiety is a big ol’ drama queen. I deal with anxiety, too, and my anxiety has convinced me of all SORTS of shitty things that never happened. I’m trying to learn to stop listening to anxiety’s bullshit.

  483. You are being avery adulty adult! Sending you all the best “It’s nothing” thoughts.

  484. I HAD THE SAME THING!! I had the biopsy, not cancer, drained once, came back, then they wanted surgery… I didn’t . I went to a aholistic health clinic, had 3 sessions of acupuncture gone forever. Regular doctors impressed. ( got easier to breathe after one session.

  485. Good for you getting it checked out! I know it’s a pain in the ass but you will feel better knowing than imagining the worst. I have a disorder that causes all sorts of WTF? situations so I get it. All the good thoughts are being sent your way.

  486. Jenny, Jenny- No worries. Did you forget all about your twin? You know, the one you told us your body absorbed. All kidding aside, I am praying for a favorable outcome.

  487. I will think good thoughts and pray. I believe St. Blaise is in charge of necks/throats– he gets a lot of attention early in the Fall when people bring candles and have their candles and their necks blessed– I’ve never done it, mostly bc this kinda stuff happens too early for me (aka noon).  You are going to be FINE. I JUST KNOW IT.  Much love from, Mindy in Iowa

    ” I am not afraid. I was born to do this.” Joan of Arc

  488. You got this! Youl’ll kick it’s ass, whether thyroid reduction surgery or whatever life throws at you, because you are amazing, strong and amazaballs awesome.

  489. You’re definitely being a grown up! My friend had her thyroid removed and all’s well. It was a fairly easy procedure for her. Fingers crossed you won’t need that but, you know, just in case.

  490. I’ve been there, and it was all OK (so I’m sending some good thoughts that yours is too). Completely out of the blue I had a swelling in my throat, that swelled pretty fast and confused all the doctors for a while. During that while it was pretty scary and anxiety-inducing, and all I could think about was swallowing. In the end they stuck an enormous needle in my neck and drained out loads of disgusting fluid (which I would never have thought I could handle but the relief was worth it). Turned out it was a random cyst on my thyroid. Hasn’t bothered me again in 10 years. I hope yours is just as simple and you can get back to not thinking about swallowing and breathing soon!

  491. Look up Bruce Lipton on YouTube, especially regarding his book The Biology of Belief. Personally, I know you can be fine, but YOU have to know it. Bruce is an MD and not some weird quack. He was one of the first to bring the field of epigenetics into medicine. Believing in health is a bit of a challenge at first, but if you know anything about quantum physics, you know how we look at things affects what we see, i.e., what materializes. A belief (in illness, for example) is just a thought we keep thinking. And it’s not so hard to change your mind if you keep playing with it. Your mind is particularly agile, so I think you have a built-in advantage. Every time I start getting particularly weird, I go to my motto: “Lighten the fuck up, Jan!” It kind of seems to put me in my place and generally makes me smile a little.
    Neuro-linquistic programming is another tool to explore. Don’t get swamped in details, just practice feeling good–about ANYTHING. It will roll over into all aspects of your life. Thanks for helping me laugh when I’ve needed it.

  492. A friend of mine had Hashimoto’s and had to have her thyroid removed. It was a (relatively) simple procedure and she came out of it just fine. Just has to take a thyroid pill every day for the rest of her life. No big deal; so do I. You will be fine. You’re too full of piss and vinegar for anything like this to get you down!

  493. I had my thyroid removed 5 years ago. Fairly quick recovery–2 days of not being able to really eat solids, then I was fine. My doctor kindly said he’d make the incision in my existing neck wrinkles (thanks, Doc), and it’s only slightly noticeable. Over time my scar tissue has hardened to where it pulls slightly when I swallow, but it’s no big deal. My voice did change ever so slightly, and I can’t sing very well anymore. I mean, I wasn’t great before, but now I’m really no good. All in all it was easy. I wish you all the best. xo

  494. I love you, Jenny, and I am sending you all the good thoughts and prayers and zen goodness and whatever else might help. Just kind of insert your version of helpful vibes here, because I’m sending them your way.

    You are awesome, and you are a grown up, and you are good to check this out. You are not a hypochondriac because something is clearly weird and thus you can’t be imagining it. That doesn’t tell you what it is, but that’s what doctors are for, yeah?

    Can’t be truly helpful on this one because I still have a functioning thyroid, but I know a few people who don’t and they get along just fine. So if it comes to that, I am sure you will too.

    <3<3<3
    Laura

  495. You are brave, funny, capable, and much loved. From one of your usually silent but appreciative readers.

  496. Firstly, prayers and positive thoughts. Secondly, congrats on being all adult about this stuff and not hiding in your blanket fort (I do so love a blanket fort; can we hang out in one after your fears are put to rest?). Thirdly, my friend had a total thyroidectomy more than 15 years ago. She’s doing great; she’s incredibly active and healthy, and recently bought a new home so she could retire in Florida. I’d hug you, but my friend said that would be weird, since you don’t know me.

  497. My mother had her thyroid removed in the 60s. She is now 86 and going strong. And in the last 50 years medicine has improved about a thousand percent. You’ll be fine.

  498. Dear Jenny,
    Sending you love and positive thoughts during this health challenge.
    Bridget

  500. Jenny, I am sending you a ton of good thoughts and love. You are being a fabulous, very adultly grown up by getting this annoying lump checked out. I am sure it’s just another stupid, and totally benign and non-dangerous thing, caused by your Hashimoto’s or RA. You are going to be better than fine. And we all have your back. Love you a ton!!!

  501. My wife had her thyroid removed — I kinda freaked out because organ removal, but the most complication that has come from it was some time getting the artificial hormones balanced right. Been a decade. She’s doing great

  502. You won’t just be fine, you will be fantastic because that is what you are now and have always been. I am sending you all my best energy today and until I hear from you that the results are good. Which they will be. Millions of people love you very much and I am one of them. You are the most creative, amazing, funny, and courageous person I know and I haven’ts even met you in person but I know who you are and admire you immensely. Hang in there; YOU WILL BE FINE!

  503. If it helps, I’m proud of you for taking care of yourself and getting this checked out. Also, you survived human parvovirus, so I’m pretty sure you’re going to karate-chop the fuck out of whatever this is until it’s dead. Just remember, “THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!”
    Sending lots of love and good juju and hugs!

  510. I can’t tell you that you’re OK but I can send you good thoughts. I can put you in my Worry Box, which is Charged with energy (and was just recently re-charged) to do healing and protections 24/7. I just add your name to it.
    Since you asked, I’ll do it (I don’t do energy work unless someone asks…and you don’t know me and I don’t know you except through your writing) but .. you asked.
    It’s the Solstice. And a Full Moon. There will be some extra good energy floating around to add to it. You’ll be as OK as you can be…Tonglen incoming as well. 🙂 <3 Namaste.

  511. I had mine removed 5 years ago for a crazy big goiter (it was 7 cm, a “normal” thyroid is 5 cm). It was not awful. I think the thing that surprised me the most was how much the muscles under my tongue and lower jaw hurt. There was some significant bruising and swelling but it wasn’t anything compared to the pain I had after I had my gall bladder out. Sending love your way. I know how scary being an adult and dealing with scary shit can be. You’ve got this.

  512. Darn it. Someone already suggested that you keep your thyroid as a specimen in a jar if the doctors end up removing it. I wanted to be the first one to recommend that. But I don’t think anyone has suggested you keep your thyroid in a blinged out, bedazzled jar, which I where I think your thyroid belongs if it doesn’t stay in your neck.

    But seriously, I went many years with difficult, life altering symptoms before finally being diagnosed with my rare disease, so I know the “waiting around for answers” part of this is very hard.

    Know that we are all thinking good thoughts for you.

  513. You can do this! You’ve already made it through a lot of hard things. I know you’ll find your way, even though it’s scary. And you have the Blog Power behind you too!

  514. When I was a teenager, I had severe hyperthyroidism which was uncontrollable by medication, because I wasn’t taking it. (It made my mouth taste like metal. Who wants that??) So they did something that I don’t think they do anymore. It they radiated away my thyroid. It was completely painless, but they told me to stay away from pregnant women for a year. Now, years later I am hypothyroid, and I take medication to keep my thyroid at normal levels. It’s all good. I’m OK, and you’ll be OK, too.

  515. I have a lot of bizzaro stuff that my doctor will actually say is normally not likely, but since it’s me….and it’s always bizarre but not deadly.

    If it helps I was vomiting weird substances for four straight hours last night and my doc isn’t in on Fridays so hopefully I’ll stop. I can send puke pics if it happens again in solidarity. Or not. Maybe just take some good juju in lieu of vomit vignettes?

  516. You’re right to be concerned. A friend had her thyroid removed and, while it wasn’t fun, it was better than dying from a 99% curable cancer. She loves her synthroid all to hell and back as does another friend who had hers removed for less dire reasons. All my best thoughts and well wishes are heading to San Antonio.

  517. Sending u the best healing vibez and some mental xanax. I had a friend go thru a similar issue and they found her cancer-free. U rule, Jenny Lawson!

  518. I doubt you’ll see this one, but I am sending good thoughts and healing white light. Everything’s going to be ok! Thank you, for your bad ass funny self, making the world a brighter place! 😍🤩😘

  519. Jenny, I work at a cancer center and my dad had his thyroid removed a few years ago. You will be okay! Most nodules/lumps are NOT cancer, and even when they are many don’t need treatment. If surgery is needed, I won’t try to pretend it’s fun, but my dad (and most of my patients) tell me that surgery was easier than they expected and recovery is pretty quick, too. I’m so sorry you’re going through all this, so scary to find these things and to have such anxiety-producing symptoms. But this is doable, you can get through this and get to the other side. Sending love your way.

  520. I’m dealing with this. I have 4 growths and 2 have an independent blood supply. I’m too afraid to go back and I haven’t found out if the growths in other parts of my body are cancerous or not. I can’t lie to you, but I give you this bear hug.

  521. TOTALLY WENT THROUGH THIS!! Okay, so it wasn’t exactly the same thing but I had a lump in my throat and it turned out to be, really, absolutely nothing. They were concerned that it could be cancer. They scared me half to death (well, I probably did most of that on my own) and did the biopsy thing (needle in the neck was great as you can imagine 🙁 ). It was a “nodule” or something and completely benign. Sooo… long story short, everything is going to be okay! Sending lots of good healing thoughts to ensure thats the case! Merry Christmas!

  523. My mom, my sister, and my boss have all had their thyroids removed and have recovered smoothly. The procedure is quick, the recovery time is short, and the synthetic hormone you have to take afterwards had no side effects – just a question of finding the right dosage. It’s going to be okay, even if it’s the thing you’re dreading. I’m

  524. Hey Jenny. Hashimotos hasn’t really been an issue for me while taking thyroid medication and I’ve been on it for 35 years. You might need a correction or your thyroid removed, but it will be okay. Also, as someone with Lupus, Fibromyalgia, depression and anxiety, I completely understand being scared and concerned when something like this happens. I was in the ER last night for what turned out to be gallstones blocking a bile duct and I was scared they were going to find cancer EVERYWHERE. There was a logical explanation and it will be okay, but how was I supposed to know until it was diagnosed? Your fears seem normal to me. Sending lots of good vibes that everything will be okay soon and there is reasonable, cancer-free explanation for you.

  525. All the best, Jenny – all my spare good thoughts (and then some) heading your way. On another note, I used to work for an endocrinologist and I’ve had many patients before that have had their thyroid removed and they were just fine after. A little more medication, but then it sounds to me that that’s probably nothing new for you. 🙂

  526. Sending good vibes Jenny. You’re not a hypochondriac. Thyroid lumps are common, they all need to be checked out. Most thyroid problems can be identified and managed either with surgery and medication or just medication.

  529. What’s the lump’s name? Have you tried talking to it to see what it wants? Maybe it’s just lonely and wants to give you a hug – from the inside…

  530. I had a very similar moment last year. Woke up with tremendous neck pain, ambulance, fear of early death, endless blood tests, 3am CT scan, etc. A week later, surgery to remove part of my thyroid. Losing my voice for more than a month. Mentally saying goodbye to my children. Biopsy: no cancer. Now: Back to my old self. This concludes the Cliff’s Notes version of my past year, medically speaking. Based on my sampling of one, I can say: You’re going to be OK.

  531. My aunt had thyroid cancer, and the doctor told her “If you’re going to get cancer, this is the one you want.” Yay? So they removed her thyroid, and she had a radiation after, and it’s all gone. She just has to take thyroid hormone, now. I hope whatever it is, they fix it quickly for you! Sending good thoughts your way.

  532. Sending you the greatest of thoughts and am so proud of you for being so grown up as to check this out! I’m looking forward to hearing your good news!

  533. The thyroid problem sounds like the most likely thing. They have a good plan for dealing with that. Success rates are really high for that. You’ll be ok. Just another speed lump in life.

  534. My grandmother had some kind of thyroid issue in the bad old days and they gave her a radioactive cocktail to kill the thyroid. She had to take thyroid pills for the rest of her life, but that was at least 40 more years.

  535. Sending you good thoughts! I feel like your body has had so many issues and things have turned out ok so far, so likely it will continue to do so.
    Is that not helpful? Sorry. Wishing you all the best.

  536. Sweetie,
    I suspect this might be connected to the allergic to your own tears trouble. Best wishes for an emotionally manageable outcome.

  537. You are going to be just fine. I will be sending positive thoughts your way. Please keep us all informed.

  538. Do they actually remove your thyroid? My mom had something done where part of it was “deactivated “ but she didn’t have to have surgery. I think it was a pill or a radioactive laser or something—I should probably know more details since it’s my mom and whatnot, but it was a while ago. Anyway, you’re going to be fine:-)

  539. Great job adulting and going to the doctor! Smart decisions like that will help to ensure you’re going to be ok! Sending you healthy, happy thoughts. Take good care!

  540. It’s probably nothing. I have multi modular goitrr(sounds sexy right?). Basically I have extra large bumps on my thyroid which causes me to feel like I am choking every time I wear a helmet, or a scarf, or a turtleneck or anything really close to my neck. Plus I have to take thyroid meds but whatever, that’s cool. It sucks but I a, sure you will be fine! I’m sending you warm thoughts from Canada!

  541. Clearly this is your heretofore unknown conjoined twin, trying to make her way out of you and become her own entity. Nebecca (aka Necky) feels like it’s her time to shine!

  542. I’m so proud of you for getting it checked out, it all sounds terrifying and you’re facing it. hugs

  543. Sending you love and light and healthy thoughts. You’re being a badass getting this taken care of, and it’s probably nothing too serious.

  544. Damn it to hell Jenny! If I was queen, all these health issues would be forbidden.🥴

  546. You’ll be fine. Even if it’s the dreaded C word, Thyroid is really easy to treat. They simply remove it. Worst case scenario, you end up with a great (tiny) scar across your throat that you can decorate for Halloween. Love.

  548. I can totally help out!! I had thyroid problems starting in (yikes) the late 80’s. Literally months of testing and doing nothing. But, I was totally exhausted, so I persisted. It was hyperactive, finally got some radiation treatment (drinking iodine from a lead cup, with a straw, no hands…very memorable). The thing subsided for about 10 years, then began to grow again. It felt on the inside of my throat exactly like your description. Back to thyroid uptake scans, needle biopsies, etc. So, I said let’s just take it out (didn’t want more radiation). Removed the offending left lobe (with the caveat that if the right looked bad or the pathology tests on the removed left lobe indicated “C”, I would let them go back in and get the right lobe– this wasn’t needed, happy to say). Recovery was quick, bandaged neck and “no sun”. I’ve got a scar at the base of my neck where they went in: I asked the (junior) surgeon to keep it small… it is narrow but long; apparently I wasn’t specific on what I meant by “small”. The biggest pain was that it took about a year to get the thyroid replacement hormones to the right level (they always start way too low). Now, it’s just a pill every morning. I hope this helps!

  549. Hey Jenny,

    First, you’re amazing. Second, I get it. Third, I’ll come over with wine. Fourth. I had my thyroid removed and it was no biggie.

  550. Hang in there, Jenny! My thyroid stopped working several years ago. I had a scan done 2 years ago and it was covered in nodules. They were thankfully benign, but it was plenty scary waiting to find that out! I am super proud of you for getting it checked. It’s hard to do when things get scary! You’re lump is likely nothing too serious, but I am sending hugs and positive vibes your way anyhow!

  551. Hang in there! I have several friends with Hashi’s and one had her thyroid removed last year. She did have some cancerous cells in there but she’s doing great now. It’s a journey with the medications, but you are not alone!

  552. I always magically feel better when I drive past the Spruill Gallery. I’m not saying it’s because of this sign (it’s totally because of this sign), but maybe it’s time for a road trip. Or your own version of this sign. Life sized. https://www.spruillarts.org

  553. Hi Jenny, I had my thyroid removed about 30 years ago, when I was a teenager. I did all of the testing and ultrasounds, so I know how scary that can be. If you do need surgery, surgical techniques have improved in the last 30 years. Your scar would be much smaller than mine, but it can be an outstanding conversation starter. 🙂 Hang in there-we stand with you, and I know that no matter what, all will be okay.

  554. Sorry about the news, but you are strong and loved. And hilarious so we’re gonna help you through this, because we need you here.

    But seriously, let us know how we can help!

  555. I had most of my thyroid removed ten years ago, when I was 22. It was so scary and the lump was really uncomfortable.
    But since then, I have taken the thyroid hormones and this a thing you can live very well with.
    You will be okay, I am sure.
    Wishing you all the best!

  556. I commend you on your level of adulting & am sending every happy, healthy, peaceful, & loving thought I have!

  559. I can tell you 1 and 2 of your questions are true, haven’t had my thyroid removed so I don’t know anything about that. But I do know how it feels like the medical problems never end. I’ve given up on feeling okay physically and mentally. Trying to hang on and you’re doing your best to also. Sending 💜.

  560. I’m so sorry Jenny. I had Graves’ disease years ago but I don’t think my thyroid was very much enlarged at the time. I had radiation treatment, not surgery. I know Hashimoto’s is a complex illness. Have you looked at the work of Datis Kharrazian (book: Why Do I Still Have Thyroid Symptoms When My Lab Tests Are Normal?), or Izabella Wentz, PharmD (multiple books on Hashimoto’s)? If not, maybe see if what they have to say resonates with you.

    Whatever the tests reveal, I sincerely hope that you have all the love and support you need, for the practical matters of doing what needs to be done, and for you to feel emotionally supported and loved.

    I think it’s good you’re doing practical things. Trust your intuition though. Even doctors and family members who mean well can push us toward something that doesn’t feel right for us.

    I am sending good thoughts & knowing your vital life force is strong and ever-rising, even in the midst of challenge and in this dark time of the year. You got this!

  561. you are going to be soo sooo fine. If they cut something out of your neck, be sure to bring it home in a jar. It will look lovely with your taxidermy animals and things.

  563. sending you tons of positive vibes and good thoughts. tell your neck to stop being a dick. <3

  564. Lots of good thoughts are heading your way and you are being a grown-up by having it checked out. Hopefully, they’ll find it’s just some temporary bug they can throw a pill at and fix. Try not to think the worst. Much love! Lynn
    lhixson1984@gmail.com

  565. You will be okay. This will sound super crazy, but I recently had a friend who is a breast cancer survivor who found a lump under her arm. She naturally was very scared and went to her oncologist for an exam and subsequently went through two weeks of blood tests and scans and felt progressively worse and became more and more scared. Turned out to be cat scratch fever. I’m not kidding. Sometimes it really isn’t the scary thing. Sometimes it’s something simple and doctors over react with their tests and scare the bejesus out of us. You will be fine.

  566. Sending lots of good thoughts and energy! A friend recently had her thyroid removed and although surgery inherently sucks, it wasn’t too bad and recovering was pretty quick. If you need a distraction, my kids are having fun making up (often inappropriate) lyrics to Jingle Bells. xoxo

  567. My grandfather had a goiter waaay back. He got it fixed, I’m assuming, as he never had a goiter when I was around. He also lived to be at least 92 years old. My dad had a hyper active thyroid in the ‘60’s and the treatment was to essentially kill it with radioactive iodine. He is still alive. I also understand that thyroid cancer is one of the most survivable cancers to get. So that about covers all of my thyroid knowledge without digging an anatomy and physiology book out. You will be fine. I’m not an MD though, so large grains of salt should be taken. I should also note that if I did dig my anatomy and physiology texts up, they would mostly deal with animals not of the human variety.

  568. My Mom had a thyroglossal duct cyst removed. It was an easy overnight stay and then she was a-ok! Her plus side was that the doctor was so easy on the eyes and we referred to him as Dr. Cute (I honestly cannot remember his name.) Anyway, you are really adulting about this and it’s something you should pat yourself on the back for so do that! Also, a friend of mine who is a science-y weird and wonderful person had to have her gall bladder out; they wouldn’t let her keep it but they let me take a picture of the picture. So try that.

  569. Back when we were 32, my BFF called me one day to tell me she had thyroid cancer. We named it Can-Sauron and set off on a little ring quest of our own. A month later she had surgery to remove Can-Sauron. She had a great surgeon who had the meticulous and unflappable sort of personality that made you confident that when she slit your throat it would be done right.

    She woke up from surgery with no problems and then had to take a couple of radiation pills in the following weeks. For one of them she drove to a hospital that could have been used for the set of the X-Files, complete with dark, abandoned hallways and buzzing, flickering florescent lights. In the waiting room there was a homeless guy sleeping on the couch. She ignored him and went up to the abandoned counter to ring the bell for service. The homeless guy got up off the couch and went behind the desk. It turns out he was the medical intern who was going to give her the radiation pill. And he was Russian. She accepted radioactive pills from a Russian. And then she had to sit back down in the waiting room for about thirty minutes because if she threw up the vomit would be a radioactive biohazard.

    That was 12 years ago. She has been cancer and thyroid-free ever since.

    You will be absolutely fine.

  570. I am sending you the absolute best feels I can. You are being so responsible and grown-up and I am sending glitter wishes that everything will be fine. ♥

  571. I had my thyroid removed when I was 20. The worst parts where; they chose to do it radioactively so I couldn’t leave the house for 48 hrs and now 10 years later I’m still dealing with going in every few weeks to check that the pills are giving me enough replacement.

  572. Jenny,

     Just because you’re an hypochondriac doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go the doctor and get taken seriously. You are being so sensible and adult that you should get a medal. You know what else you did that was right? You asked for help. You knew it was time to stop amusing all of us and say, “Help get me through this.” It’s OK to be scared. Lumps are scary. 

   I too am sending you massive amounts of good wishes, sympathy, and admiration. You already know sometimes it’s a long and nasty road back to being OK,  but we’ll travel it with you.

  I’m putting on my walking shoes now.

    Ruth

  574. I’m sending all the good thoughts! All of them! and, its best to get these things checked out. Absolutely.

  575. Breath Jenny, you are going to be ok. The tests are scary I know, and so is the maybe surgery but having your thyroid out is a good solution if it’s acting really wonky. Sending prayers for speedy solutions

  576. Jen, I’ve been reading this blog for quite awhile, and it’s really time to tell you to KNOCK IT OFF! You are literally exhausting yourself, running hither and yon for cures and comfort, and totally ignoring your own power. You, my dear, are the typical Dorothy (of Oz fame). You have such an imagination! Picture this: There’s a group of angels looking down at you and tut-tutting over their coffee … “Jesus, girls, what the heck is WITH this woman? I’m reaching the end of my rope! She chose a life with the goal of demonstrating to herself and others her brilliance, yet keeps rejecting and any insights or assistance. What else can we do? She wanted an unusual childhood so she’d have material to draw from. Done. Reasonable wealth. Done. A husband with the patience of God himself. Done. Animals to keep her from drowning in her own warped mind. Done and done and done. She has hundreds of people telling her how fabulous she is. Literary talent to reach out. But she keeps sabotaging herself! How much more assistance can we provide? She has to understand who she really is, and get rid of all this nonsense about helplessness. Pass the cream.” YOU, Jenny, are who you have been waiting for and seeking out. All along it’s been you. Everything else is props. Until you are willing to see what you seek, you will continue to attract the opposite. Look inside. You’re great. You’re not diseased. But your BRAIN doesn’t know that until you make it clear, and you BODY will simply respond to what your brain is focused on. (You like scary movies–why do you think you jump when the guy with the knife pops into the shower? Because your brain tricks your body into thinking it’s really happening!) So simple if you understand that YOU are the man behind the curtain. Yet somehow so devastatingly difficult for most to grasp. Years of programming by religion, teachers, government, etc., to comply and relinquish our power. Easier to crawl under the table. Use that (literally) blessed imagination of yours and go for the gold. And don’t think I haven’t had my share of mental illness–for DECADES–and yet now I can say I’ve never felt better or more excited about how things are turning around. And here’s a weird one (since weird is your specialty): you can actually talk to your cells. They’ve been waiting to hear from you, but are running around like a class of kids with a substitute teacher. KICK SOME ASS! (But with love a gratitude :))

  577. Hey, you are going to be just fine. I’m so proud you went to the doctor to get checked. That is so difficult and you’ve already done that so you can handle the rest. My thoughts are with you.

  578. All will be well. If your doctor didn’t rush you into tests and scans then she’s not too worried. You are adulting very well however your thyroid gland is not. As a retired nurse, I say that you are handling this hiccup very well and I send you positive thoughts and sturdy hugs. Remind yourself that as you age, your body will be falling apart and it seems that your thyroid is the first to get cranky.

  579. My sister was hypethryoid..I was hypo…. she had hers knocked dead with radiation, I take levotheroxine…. if it needs to go, you will deal. Sending you masses of energy to get through this real terror…. Love you.

  581. I have “The Hashies” too. If you have a history of goiters (what a fun word to say…kinda like moist. Moist. Goiter. Goiter. Spork. Squirrel!) it’s most likely a goiter. If you’re lucky, they’ll take the whole damned thyroid out and you can be done messing with worrying about it.
    You’re going to be ok! I’m really glad you put your big girl panties on and dealt with it so you don’t have to worry any longer than necessary. There’s a whole lotta people on your side rooting for you. Much love.

  582. When I was about 20, I developed a lump at the base is my throat. Right in that little indent. It felt weird. I could feel it when I talked or breathed or swallowed. It felt HUGE. I was aware of it all the time and I was scared as hell. And it kept getting bigger. I was convinced I was dying.
    Eventually (like 2 years later) my friend made me go to the doctor about it. Turned out it was a completely harmless kind of cyst. Had to put magna-plasm on it for two weeks, then the whole cyst popped out of my neck through one of my pores. It was really gross and really cool. It was also only about the size of one of those split pea things, old people put in soup.
    Stuff in your throat always feels bigger than it is.

  583. I had half my thyroid and part of my parathyroid removed 21 years ago and it was not terrible. I stayed in the hospital only one night. I was in pain for about a week, but then I was able to go back to living my normal life. The remaining lobe keeps doing all the work, too, so I don’t need to take medication. And — bonus — I now have a “drunk-o-meter.” You can’t tell the incision is there during normal conditions, but once I have a drink, I get a little red line over my incision site. And, once I have two drinks, the line gets a little redder. And so on and so forth. So, anyone can tell how much I’ve had to drink by looking at my drunk-o-meter.

    Seriously speaking, though, it was not a bad surgery, and I am sure techniques have improved over the last two decades so incisions are smaller and recovery time is shorter. And before they were able to confirm that my tumor was benign, every doctor said that if you have to get cancer, you want thyroid cancer, because it is one of the slowest-moving and easiest to treat.

    I wish you well. Feel free to message me if you have any questions.

  585. Thyroid issues runs in the family, my grandmother, mother & sister has all had issues with theirs. My sister’s grew outwards (it was brought on by having a child) and went down by itself and mum had one growing inwards. Hers has been acting up for years and at one point was about to have it operated on when it suddenly calmed down. However I believe my grandmother had to have it removed. Though she has since passed away (not due to thyroid issues) so I can’t ask her about it. What I am trying to say is that they were all OK 🙂 . Maybe yours will go down by itself and even if it doesn’t whilst I get it’s scary I am sure the operation must be routine

  586. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s last year after seeing my doctor for pressure on my throat. I only needed low doses of thyroid medication daily and the thyroid went back to its normal size.

  587. From an anxious Bloggess follower: big hugs. Take deep breaths and regardless of the out come.. YOU ARE SAFE. YOU ARE HERE. big love.

  588. I have had and am in complete remission from thyroid cancer so … if it is the worst possible scenario—congratulations — you have the most curable form of cancer that exists so even if it is cancer you will be fine. Also what you are describing sounds like what I went through when I had a benign tumor on my thyroid. I had half of it removed and afterward was fine. Eight years later when I did have thyroid cancer – I didn’t know it until the lump was in my lymph nodes and I was in stage three. So although I am not a doctor I have experienced both a benign tumor on my thyroid and cancer on my thyroid and again, what you describe is what I went through when it was benign. I had the breathing and coughing and they aspirated it and then removed it. In other words. As scary as this is, you will be fine. Like you I suffer from clinical depression and (Hoshiimotos) you have been a real comfort to me so please let me be the same for you. You will be fine. Hugs.

  589. I’m going to tell you from experience that things are going to be okay. I go through this every time I have a pain or something unexplained. I tell my doctors that I’m the worst possible case–a hypochondriac with a severe anxiety disorder who has had cancer. So I totally get where you’re coming from and it’s completely normal and you’re going to be fine. I’m sending you warm, fuzzy thoughts and hugs and all the other good things I can think of.

  590. I have plenty of positive energy and thoughts and love to send your way. You share so much with so many it is the least I can do. I will always be in your corner and willing to give support any time. You are a vey special person and the world is better with you in it. You got this !

  591. Thyroid are a devil to deal with. I’m sending you all of the good vibes and hugs. I discovered I had severe hyperthyroidism and Grave’s Disease over the summer. The Dr recommended radioactive ablation of the thyroid. It wasnt too bad and didn’t hurt but I had to avoid my family and pets for several days while I was radioactive. Things were fine while the thyroid slowly died and then things went severely hypothyroid. Currently they are trying to get the hormone replacement medication dosage dialed in. The hardest part has been dealing with not being able to predict what my body is doing and the impact of the fluctuating hormones on my mood /mental health. It has been and continues to be quite a journey but it is one you can get through with support of friends and family. I have clung to the idea that depression is a lying bastard and been open with others about how I was feeling and that has helped a lot. I don’t feel like this is the most uplifting response but I wanted to be honest. Know that everything will work out no matter what the path. More big hugs!

  592. Sounds like you are probably already familiar with synthroid – I’m hypothyroid and have to take it every morning and it’s not a huge deal. If it is something scary like thyroid cancer (which it’s probably not!), you’ll be glad you caught it early because the survival rate is extremely, extremely high. Like 99+%. But of course, it could just be your thyroid being all out of whack because people with thyroid disorders are just extra lucky sometimes (yay us). I have a dear friend who had her thyroid removed with the diagnosis of thyroid cancer and even though she is one of the rare ones with a not-so-great prognosis she is managing it and lives a normal, healthy life now. She gets scans every once in a while and if anything changes they adjust her medications. Know that whatever happens, you’re not alone. You are a brilliant, resilient, tough as nails lady and you will be fine. (Sidenote: this is the first time I’ve written you but I wanted you to know that during some of my darkest times your books inspired me and made me laugh, so thank you for helping steer me back toward sanity. Or partial sanity at least, and I will forever be grateful and a huge fan.)

  593. I also have Hashis and this isn’t an unusual development. You are being super-dee-dooper grownup and responsible by having it checked out. I am sending you 80% of my good juju because today is shower day and I’m going to need some myself. Big hugs, and I know two people who have had their thyroids out, and they seem to be fine. XOXO

  594. Holy moley, you are so well loved that this is the 591st comment since you posted this AM. Good for you for having this checked out and good thoughts for it turning out to be not much of anything. And from what others are saying, you will be able to handle it even if it does turn out to be something. Did you see that one comment about just upping your synthoid dosage if you eat too much? I mean, c’mon!

  595. I had half my thyroid removed 20 years ago…spent one night in the hospital. No biggie; no residual effects. I wish the surgeon had done a little ‘nip & tuck’ while waiting for the biopsy, but my insurance wouldn’t have paid for a neck lift. Best of luck to you.

  596. I had half my thyroid, along with what turned out to be a benign tumor almost the size of a golf ball, removed about 10 years ago. It wasn’t fun, but it wasn’t awful either — the worst side effect was that I messed my posture up for a little while afterwards because I was half-convinced my head would fall off if I stretched my neck too much! Here’s hoping everything goes as quickly, easily, and painlessly as possible for you… and also that your head doesn’t fall off. 🙂

  597. You are a very responsible adult and are dealing with this in an admirably grown-up way.
    I’m sure it will turn out ok.
    I once had madly hyperactive nodes in my thyroid gland which had to be nuked by taking a radioactive pill (I’m not making this up) and staying a week at hospital. No visitors allowed because of the risk of contaminating them. Fun times. 🙂
    Greetings, positive thoughts and best wishes from Germany.

  598. Sending you my best thoughts, and many hugs — IDK if you are a hypochondriac, but getting it checked is super (and super scary. Few people get how sometimes one has to get to a place where the panic outweighs the fears of getting checked — but it’s real. <3 You will probably feel better getting it checked even if there are problems, because, at least in my experience, once the panic is huge, anything is better. Love and hugs, we love you. Also you do not have to apologize for being real. We are not always funny ourselves.

  599. You are definitely going to be ok. It’s the Hashimotos acting up, I know cuz 1 have had for years. Anxiety and OCD can be a bitch.

  600. But you were funny—‘lightly strangled’! Hurling positive thoughts your way. Hope you’re comfortable until this gets sorted out.

  601. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s last year although my gyno and gp disagree on this. Either way I’m stuck on thyroid medication and watched (literally as I weighed myself daily) as I gained 70 pounds in 7 months. It’s all more or less stabilized now but I haven’t exactly lost the weight. My sister had her thyroid removed and she’s been fine since. I know it’s scary, I also see it as a possibility for my future but it does help to know someone personally who has been through it and can tell me what it’s like, and she’s a hypochondriac big time so she embellishes, a little. Thinking of you and sending tons of good thoughts and energy your way! <3

  602. Feeling like you can’t breathe is terrifying. When my vocal cords swell (because I’m fucking weird and my body hates me), I try to stay calm by reminding myself I’m getting enough oxygen, even if it doesn’t feel like i am.

    It is scary when our bodies turn against us. I’m happy you are able to get good medical assistance and hopefully they will get to the bottom of it super fast.

    Hugs

  603. I have a good feeling about this! I just had both chesticles cut off only to find out that I did not have breast cancer. (Yay me!) Think of it like this, I had a bi-lateral mastectomy so now you luck out and will get to keep breathing and swallowing without any surgery. Next time it’s totally your turn, though! Sending you big prayers and awesome vibes.

  607. Thinking of you and sending lots of good/healing wishes! I am glad you’re having it checked out!

  608. I have Hashimoto also. Worst case they remover thyroid and you stay on Syth thyroid mess for life which you kind of have to anyways wishing you good health with love!

  609. In May my GYN found a mass in my Vulva. It grew in two months time to a ping pong ball size. Needless to say being cut on my female parts was NOT fun. It was not cancer but the Patholigyst did not even know where to begin to figure out what it was. He sent it to Emory for another 10 days and they were also baffled. I’m the end they claimed it was a Fibroid Tumor. I think they didn’t know what else to call it. It was a solid for sure. But Fibroid Tumors don’t grow on the vulva. So who knows but I’m fine so far and it’s been about 6 months since the surgery. You will be fine and it will be like mine. Just a big dumb tumor. Lol love ya!!

  610. You’re smart to have that looked at. We have a saying in our family: “You don’t die from finding out that you have cancer. You die from NOT finding out that you have cancer.” I can’t guarantee that all will be just hunky-dory, but you are on the right road. One bit of advice: DON’T GOOGLE THE SYMPTOMS. It always comes out the same: whatever you have will kill you. And that’s almost always not true, so just don’t even look.
    Thinking of the good care you will get while diagnosing the issue and beyond, and good thoughts for strength and love.

  611. My husband had a large benign growth on his thyroid that was pressing on his windpipe. Surgery, removed 1/2 his thyroid and a lump the size of a fist. Overnight hospital stay. He is absolutely fine now, takes a small dose of thyroid medication daily, and looks like he has a cute little zipper on his neck. It will be fine, sending you good energy.

  612. Blessings of good health to you, Jenny. You are being a good responsible adult by seeing your doctor. Keep thinking positive thoughts.

  617. YOU WILL BE OKAY! My friend’s dad had his thyroid removed years ago and he has beenok. Of course, he takes medicine, but that’s manageable. I’m sending you lots of positive thoughts, and will be praying for you as well. Keep us posted, and remember we’re all here for you!!!

  618. Yes you’re being a grown up (we all need to do that sometimes but try not to make it a habit). You don’t have to be funny all the time, especially when you’re scared. Sending you lots of love and positive vibes.

  619. I am sending all my good vibes your way!!! You got this!! well, that might sound threatening. I trust that you can handle this. I really hope you’re okay, and I’m sorry you’re going through this.

  621. I have hypothyroidism, and I sometimes experience the exact same thing. You’re probably going to be fine, but keeping my fingers crossed for you anyway!

  622. I had my thyroid removed about 20 years ago. Mine was enlarged and not cancerous (sounds similar to yours, but mine was caught early before it got that large). The surgery went well – I had a great surgeon and you could barely see the scar (can’t see it at all now). I just have to take synthetic thyroid hormone now. I get my blood checked twice a year. I don’t think they’ve ever changed my dosage, though. Sending healing vibes your way!

  623. I am sending you all the positive energy i have. Wishing you lots o happiness. On that same line of thought suck it up buttercup, this is temporary, and you will be chasing down taxidermified glory in no time. It is probably very frightening, but you can make it through this. Happy Holidays!!

  624. You’re doing the right thing getting it checked. Take heart, your thyroid is just about the easiest organ to replace with meds. My husband just had his thyroid removed this spring and is doing great. Even if it is cancer, most of the types of thyroid cancer are quite curable.

  625. You are doing the right thing to get it taken care of and will breathe easier (both ways) when it is over. Love and warm thoughts to you.

  626. Jenny, I had my thyroid taken out about 3 months ago now, because I had thyroid cancer. Everything went fine, I had to stay in the hospital over night to make sure I didn’t have any complications and I have to take a pill daily but other than that I’m fine. The first 2 days after surgery it was uncomfortable with pain and swelling but with pain medication it was covered and I’ve had no lasting long term effects so far. Sending good thoughts your way.

  627. I’ve had my thyroid out over ten years ago. My mum had thyroid cancer well before that, and is 100% fine.
    Yeah, it’s surgery and no one does that for fun, but you literally take a tablet every day and forget about it. If you have Hashimoto’s you probably already do that.

  629. Not every post has to be funny. Many hugs and best wishes to you. Keep us posted.

  630. I know you will be okay. It may take some medical shenanigans to make that happen, but you will be fine. I feel it in my heart.

  633. I’m so glad that you got yourself to a doctor to have it looked at. Scary, I’m sure, but you will get through it. I’m sending positive thoughts your way. 🙂

  634. My daughter came up with a fantastic saying…
    “It’ll all be ok in the end. If it’s not ok, then it’s not the end.”
    So, sending hugs, and secretly hoping its not just a huge pimple that pops and disappears leaving everyone thinking you are a hypochondriac! xxx

  636. I’m glad you’re getting this checked out, Jenny. I’ll be thinking of you over the next few days, and I hope that your medical team can figure out what’s going on. It sounds like you’re in good hands. Happy Solstice! warm hug

  637. No matter the outcome, you will still be amazing. You have Victor and Hailey and your quirky, fantastic family. You have a gazillion people out here in the world who are doing whatever intercessory thing they believe in, and above all of this, you are loved.

    Try not to worry, and enjoy Christmas.
    Peace

  638. I had half my thyroid removed because they weren’t sure if the growth was cancerous. It was scary at the time but it was benign and I’m fine. Recovery wasn’t too long. You’ll be fine 🙂

  639. Hey there!! Good news! I had half my thyroid removed and it was easy as pie! I promise! Although pie is not at all easy to make, but it’s super easy to eat, so there! I’ll send lots of good vibes out to you. My recovery quick, it was outpatient and I was up and about the next day. Don’t worry, you’re being very responsible and getting it taken care of quickly!

  641. I had a giant tumor on my thyroid when I was 23, started the size of a grape, became the size of an egg, they took out the right half of my thyroid, and I never had to start meds, cause the other half kind of kicked back online when the tumor stopped squashing it. I am hypothyroid still but only a little, so I haven’t taken meds for it, but i get bloodwork annually to monitor it. The way it was described to me by the doctor once you begin taking synthrois your thyroid decides you don’t need it’s help anymore and permanently retires, so I am putting it off as long as I can, but thyroid conditions (including Hashimodos) run in my family. So you will be OK! Just do what your doctors tell you, and if they give you meds take them as directed and keep getting checkups when you go in for your annual exam and you’ll be OK! Also, you might be better than you have been, if they remove the tumor and put you on synthroid or whetever you may find that your mood stabilizes and you have more energy! Don’t be too scared, I am a huge coward about surgery and I managed to do it.

  642. I too, had a lumpy thyroid from Hashimotos and after fine needle biopsies twice and many ultrasounds, they told me I’m just lumpy. I’m sorry the lump is making it harder to breathe, I can imagine that would feel scary! About removing the thyroid, if there was any way to remove just a part, that would be an improvement than removing all of it. I’ve learned a lot from stopthethyroidmadness.com and it may be a helpful resource to you too in learning more about thyroid removal issues. I also follow their facebook group and have found that helpful too. Sending good vibes and hopes that whatever it is, is easy to resolve and not serious. Love to you.

  644. Jenny you will be fine! Adulting sucks! I’ve had my thyroid removed and it wasn’t that big of deal. I take thyroid meds every day. I had a really fun surgery. I had one surgeon remove my thyroid and one remove my right breast in the same surgery!! I had breast cancer in 2004 and had a one boob mastectomy. In 2009 I had my thyroid removed because it had enlarged and had dead areas and my other breast removed because breasts are just a pain! I had a endo a few years ago and the doctor enlarged my windpipe just a bit (I think he used a balloon). hang in there!

  646. You are being a grown up for sure for checking it out and I’m sending lots of good thoughts for it being nothing serious your way. Also, I have 1 friend that had a huge growth on her thyroid (it was noticeable and wasn’t a ‘goiter’ (which is such a funny word for a not funny thing) and ended up being a benign growth but it was causing her the same issues as you are experiencing so she had to have it removed. It went really well and she was quickly back to her normal self. I have another friend that had to have part of her thyroid and parathyroid removed and she also did very well with the surgery and could talk with a whisper right after the surgery and was able to walk her 39th 12k race about 7 months later (and she is 80). So odds are you’ll be okay and just have to have the growth removed and will back kicking ass and taking names. I have a 2cm nodule on my thyroid but it’s up against my carotid artery which is not good. Fortunately it is benign but was scary for sure. The radiologist said (which wasn’t helpful) ‘if it turns out to be cancer, it’s the easiest cancer to get because they can remove it and it rarely spreads’. Somehow this wasn’t very comforting because really? IS there a ‘good cancer to get’ as they put it and since I’m a worrier by nature I’m thinking the absolute worst.

  647. I had my thyroid removed 3 years ago (age 58) and it was easy peasy lemon squeezy. I take a tablet every morning and I feel great. The only thing I miss is the walnuts that are on the list of things to avoid while taking Synthroid.

  648. Ack. I have thyroid issues and I HATE having biopsies, but then that “nope, still nothing!” is such a nice phone call. I have a neck like a football player, but taking thyroid replacement the rest of my life is a deal-breaker and my neck wouldn’t get thin again anyway. I am sending a message to the cosmos: Good health, peace and happiness for Jen in the new year and always.
    You’ll be fine. I insist.

  649. It’s amazing to me that I could love someone sooooo much who I’ve never met (that’s not technically true because I did meet you at a book signing and told you that you are a force for good in the universe!). I send you so much love and calming energy. You are going to be fine and you are being very adult to get this checked out. A zillion good thoughts are coming your way. One of the reasons we all love you so much is because you make it safe for the rest of us to be real because you are real – it’s okay not to be funny! Love you and Blessed Winter Solstice.

  650. Your a magical unicorn. No really. Now meet Bob.

    I had problems swallowing last year and also thought I was dieing. Come to find out I have cysts (nobody knows where they came from or how… f#$& aliens) and there are a ton, so many they didn’t care to count, and they told me I have a goiter. Besides that being seriously fun to say, my goiter Bob and I have ultrasounds every six months.

    Sad part… I can’t hold a tune anymore because it affects my vocal cords, so I could sing in the car and then my voice cracks like a teenage boy hitting puberty, and it hasn’t been the same. When I get super stressed (like that happens to anyone when they work too many hours a week and have children) it gets worse, but also when I eat things like kale, broccoli, cauliflower, it swells up more. CHOCOLATE CAKE FTW! The shit-tastick part is I can’t get an answer as to why. I’m in my 40’s and I am sure my hormones are not the devil (or are they?),

    Good part… it is not cancerous and I get to name it Bob… the cysts I like to pretend as a whole is “bob”. Damn Bob.

  651. My now 15 year old had her thyroid removed 13 months ago (she’d developed Graves’ disease and had an allergic reaction to the medication it is treated with). She had the surgery on a Friday and went back to school on Tuesday. Titrating the synthetic hormone took a little time because she’s an adolescent, but it’s fine. When they removed it, they said it was 6cm (about 6x normal).

    CHOP actually gave us a dvd about the surgery, and I’m sure we could send it to you if you’d like.

  652. First off, big hugs from Montana.

    I surgically said goodbyebye to my thyroid back almost 19 years ago, thanks to Graves’ Disease. I only had to stay overnight, and went home the next morning. The only thyroid-related complication I had was that a parathyroid gland hitched a ride out on the thyroid, and my calcium level dipped too low on me as a result. I felt like I had a living form of rigor mortise tortoise. That was nothing a little calcium IV drip couldn’t fix, though. It did take some time to get my replacement meds titrated, but that was mainly because the synthetic hormone wasn’t what my collected pile o’ goop wanted or needed. After we switched to Armour, everything was much better as far as thyroid levels go, and these days that is pretty stable.

    My guess is that if your thyroid goes goodbyebye, you’re going to have an easier time getting your meds and thyroid status stabilized, because you’ve already got some experience with that from your Hashi’s.

    I do deal with fibro and migraines, too, but the thyroid stuff is mostly just in the background, and largely off the radar. Occasionally, it gets off a bit, but I bounce back pretty quickly with an Armour adjustment.

    I learned from experience that wonky thyroid levels either way can make my emotions go bonkers. Right now I’m just a little bit hypothyroid, and it makes me wear my emotions on my sleeve. I can start bawling at cute little fuzzy animals, or even cute little pocket lint fluffs, or even nothing at all. It’s kind of irrational, but it’s just the hormones talking. Adjusting my levels sorts it back out like magic. Maybe fixing your thyroid thing will help sort out some of your emotional stuff and bring things back to an even keel, too.

    I really think that it’s all going to work out okay for you, especially since you’ve got that rad sense o’ hoomer to see you through, and your fabulous family and critters to support you. And all of us fans are in your corner, too, pulling for you with all our hearts.

  653. Life is manageable without the thyroid. My friend has been living without one for 25 years. Just takes synthroid. You will be fine if they take it out. Your doctors got this. If it’s necessary, they will nip it out and you will go home and get lots of sympathy for at least a day from Victor.
    I think anxiety makes the whole thing so much harder. And the longer they stretch out the testing the bigger the anxiety gets. When my anxiety gets overwhelming, I take a deep dive into books or podcasts. Something that has nothing at all to do with my life. Fantasy is good for me. No dragons or wizards in real life, so I can live in that life while time passes until answers come.
    You got this. Think of how you have kicked ass on all the medical issues you have had for the last 2 or more years. You didn’t take it passively. You got this.

  655. Sending you MEGA good vibes. You are doing the right thing having yourself checked out. Hang in there. Hugs. P.S. I still have my thyroid and it doesn’t work I’ve been taking synthetic for 15 years no issues.

  656. You are SO Loved and adored! Look at all these comments!! Took forever to scroll to the bottom to leave you words of support and encouragement..which might seem redundant at this point but sometimes life is scary and redundant is good. I’ve known two different people who had their thyroids removed and they are both doing great. You will be well too. The world and your family needs you far too much. Congrats on adulting and know I will be sending you the most positive thoughts throughout. Peace

  657. Love you, Jenny. Never posted before, but now I send my positive energy to my friend who doesn’t know me. Pulsing, living, breathing positive energy. You will be okay. We need you in our world. Breathe.

  659. Abracadabra! Swish! Your worries are healed. You are surrounded by seven tons of love.

  660. Sending you TONS of love and healing. You ARE being an adult by having it checked but adulting sucks.

    I’ll be waiting for the update that it’s just an alien implant that will bring world peace.

    ♥️♥️♥️♥️

  661. Sending much love, good wishes and prayers to you and your family. You are greatly loved.

  662. Adulting win for sure!
    Seriously though, + + + + + + thoughts that this is resolved quickly and in the easiest manner possible for you.
    ♥️ from FL

  663. I had a total thyroidectomy in April. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done, and the scar is almost unnoticeable. You will absolutely be fine. IF they go that route, prep with some ice cream (you’ll have a sore throat immediately after; that’s the worst part) and buy some fancy scarves for the immediate aftermath and you’ll be good.

  664. I had a large lump that turned out to be benign, and had half my thyroid removed. What was odd was suddenly being aware of, and seeing, those faint scars on the necks of other women who had had all or part of their thyroids removed! Suddenly you are part of an odd Women with Cool Scars Club. Since it is pressing on your windpipe odds are it will be removed. And, odds are it will be benign. So don’t worry overmuch. Our bodies just get cranky and do weird things, create oddball lumps and creases and spots, as we get older.

    I do like the post above that notes it may be an alien implant….!!!

  665. I’m sure you’ll be fine! It’s always good to hear that but anxiety always makes you second guess everything 🙁

  666. You’re amazing, no lump will change that! Always a good idea to get abnormalities checked out. Sending positive thoughts your way! 💜

  667. My mother had her thyroid removed for exactly the same reason, and the surgery and recovery were fine. Her only complication was a lack of Calcium (sometimes your body just stops making it when you don’t have a thyroid anymore), BUT that was a known complication, and is easily managed with calcium gummies.

  668. My (now ex) husband got his thyroid removed almost 20 years ago after a scare that was very similar to what you’re describing. He’s just fine now. Well, actually he’s a huge selfish jerk, but I promise that was a pre-existing condition.

    Sending you all the positive energy I’ve got.

  669. I’m new here, but I wanted to encourage you. You will absolutely be ok. And if it turns out that you’re not ok, you’re strong enough to handle it. Also, I noticed that you had 666 comments and, well, just in case…. Well, now you have 667 comments. (You’re welcome 😏) Seriously, you’re gonna be fine! 👍🏼

  670. I also have hashimoto’s, so I feel your pain. A few years back I had the left lobe removed, due to a large goiter and abnormal biopsy resusts. Thankfully, no cancer in the end! I won’t lie and say it was easy, but it wasn’t terrible either. The worst part was trying to get my hormone levels right afterwards. Get a good endocrinologist! If you do have to have surgery, have an appointment with the endocrinologist very shortly after it. Your levels will go insane and you will feel awful until they get regulated. If you have any questions, please reach out! I might Kermit flail for a few minutes if you do, but eventually I would be able to talk! Good luck!

  671. We were there for you when your ovaries were assholes. Your neck being a dick is just another hurdle for us to get through. You lift the world with your furious happiness, we will carry your various dick and asshole body parts across the bridge, up the hill, wherever we need to go. Hugs hugs hugs you amazing person you.

  673. My best friend had her thyroid removed today after biopsies and tests came back as a 50/50 chance her thyroid nodule was cancer. Who knows?!? But since her sister had thyroid cancer a few years ago they took the whole thing out and are sending it to pathology to see if it’s cancer. (If it is, she gets radioactive iodine, which sounds like something from a comic book, but is apparently a real thing. All I’m saying is I’m pretty sure there’s a 50/50 chance my best friend is going to get super powers in the next few weeks.) Through this whole process ALL of her doctors kept telling her “well if I had to pick a cancer to have it would be this one.” Which isn’t the BEST thing to say in this situation, but their point is, even if it is cancer, it’s easily treatable and you shouldn’t need chemo. So I guess that’s good? Anyway, it’s going to be okay. You are a grown up. Surgery is never fun, but my best friend seems to be doing okay.

  674. Hi Jenny, I had my thyroid removed six years ago. I did have cancer. It was an easy surgery and recovery. The hardest part was getting my synthroid level correct after and even that was not terrible. You will be fine. Love to you, P

  675. Aw, Jenny. I have Hashi’s too. The Synthroid I take every day seems to help, but every time I get a new goiter I FREAK OUT. Mostly, Hashi’s is a NON-CANCEROUS problem! MOSTLY! It usually does not morph into cancer. Breathe. Waiting for results is the hardest part. Well. If they decide to do a needle biopsy, that part is hard too, not gonna lie. It’s okay! It’ll be okay! My grandma had no thyroid due to Hashi. Lived decades that way. ^_^ Sending love, hang in there, and yes, you are SUCH a grown up! These things always make me want to duck my head in the sand. :/ <3 <3 <3

  676. This is yet another time being a human rather than a cat sucks. Years back, I had a coworker that had thyroid problems and radioactive iodine treatment. In humans, it kills the thyroid and you have to take pills for the rest of your life, no big deal. Six months later my cat had the same problem, same solution…but in cats it only kills the “diseased” tissue. So, complete cure, no pills. Thank God, because none of us would have survived seven years of shoving pills down her throat.

  677. Hi Jenny!
    Do you drink a lot of caffeine or anything with stevia. I had a similar issue and my ENT couldn’t figure it out. Turns out, too much caffeine can trigger it or an allergy to stevia. I cut out both and my symptoms went away. Not saying, that is what it is but it could be worth looking into. Hope you feel better soon! Happy Christmas!

  678. My daughter was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s TODAY after years of us being stumped by all of her crazy symptoms. Any advice? Sending good thoughts your way!

  679. My daughter had her thyroid removed at age 17 (cancer). It was scary, of course. But she is TOTALLY FINE. Bonus- it really reduced her anxiety.

  680. I’m a bit worried that “being lightly strangled by your imaginary friend” is a possibility. I think you need a better caliber of imaginary friends.

  681. Sending good energy. You’re gonna be OK. Even if you have to have surgery, you’ll be OK.
    I’m hoping you just have a swollen lymph node from cedar fever. The cedar pollen was
    really off the charts the last couple of days. Everyone in Central Texas is coughing and
    crying and sneezing.

  682. Hey bloggess goddess! My sister’s thyroid was destroyed when she was a teenager by radiation for Hodgkin’s. She has her levels checked and takes a thyroid pill to regulate it but has been fine. Dad recent had a strangulated salivary gland that landed him the hospital for the night. Antibiotics put him right. Don’t freak out until it’s time to. Hugz

  684. sends soooooooo many good thoughts and vibes!! Oh goodness I’m so sorry. Medical stuff can be scary, even when it’s probably fine. I’ve been on meds for overactive thyroid or somesuch, but never had anything like that. I would say something about maybe taking a therapy animal with you to your appointments, but I’m sure you’ve already thought of all that.

    I’m struggling with my depression right now, to the point where I’ve had to lower my work hours for the first time in over a year. I listen to your audiobooks daily though, and they still make me smile, so it’s not too bad!

  685. You have done all the right things! It’s perfectly reasonable to be scared. I am sending you good thoughts and energy that all will be good because that is totally possible. I also want you to know that I’ve had the “c” word in my neck and lived to tell the tale, so whatever it is, you will take care of it and then probably write about it and give us all something to laugh about.

  686. Sorry I always seem to be the last one to post…Washington state is a long way from you…and it’s late before I ever get a chance to sit and read. But even though late I am praying for you, and I know it helps. My daughter was diagnosed with stage4 cancer in Oct. She’s had 2 rounds of chemo so far and it and prayers ‘re working. The tumor is 90% gone!
    I’ve had thyroid problems in the past, hyper, not hypo. It was spewing out lots of extra hormones and I was jetting around like I was on speed. My thyroid was huge, like I was trying to swallow a guineapig. They were going to remove it but the thing sprayed out so much that it shrunk on its own. I hope yours just goes away all on its own!!! You are in my prayers.

  688. Sending you lots of good thoughts, and love and light. You are absolutely doing the right thing by having it checked out. I’m sorry you have to go through this, but it will all work out ok. Keeping you in my prayers for the best possible outcome. xoxo

  690. OK, I had most of my thyroid removed 15 years ago.It was supposed to be all of it but surgeon forgot the plan. A few months later he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. No joke. But it did the trick. Not fun but not awful.
    But

  692. My mom had her thyroid removed because it was cancerous. It was all encapsulated, though, and it was a huge tumor, but it was really easy for her (she didn’t even do radiation because it was self-contained). She was in the hospital getting it out less than a week after they found it and was out the next day. Had no problem with healing. She did lose her voice mostly for about 6 months, but it (her voice) came back and she’s totally fine. It freaked us all (her children) out, but she thought it was nothing.

  693. I had my thyroid removed in 2001 due to suspicious nodules that turned out to be cancer. The surgery and recovery were a piece of cake. The only weird feeling I had was thinking that if I threw my head back it would just pop right off – incision was right at the base of the neck and held together with steri strips. Luckily that didn’t happen lol. You got this.

  695. You are definitely doing the right thing by having it checked. I’ve been strangled by my invisible friend before and never had anything show up on ultrasound. Often it’s anxiety causing it. Totally understand how unpleasant the uncertainty of waiting to find out what it is can be. Sending you all sorts of good thoughts.

  696. It’s all going to be okay. My mom just got out of the hospital this week after waiting FAR too long to have her throat looked at. She had coughing fits that would land her in the ER and would wheeze when she talked. Turned out she had excess tissue growing in her trachea narrowing it down to 5mm wide. Also she had a flap of muscle (likely loosened from a bout of bronchitis) that would cover her windpipe every time she coughed. All the blood test were fine, the biopsies were fine, they just removed all the excess tissue and everything is fine. THANK YOU for having this looked at. I really wish my mom wouldn’t have waited 7 months and suffered so long before having it looked at. You’re going to be fine. Sending you lots of hugs. You got this.

  697. Prayers for Peace to be in your heart, and healing strength to be with you. It sounds like a pretty scary thing, but you will get through this. You are a very strong person (Stop laughing!) and have proven it many times over the years (No…really…STOP laughing!)

  698. You are absolutely doing the exact right things by A. Getting this checked out and B. Freaking out a little. You’re allowed when things are not right, as long as you also do A.

    My best friend had a lump on her thyroid removed and she was fine. You will be too. Also she lied to everyone who asked her what the bandage around her throat was. “Cut myself shaving” was probably my favourite response. 😀

  699. Hi! I just want to say I’m proud of you! For being a grown up, for taking that first step to get it checked. And also remind you that you aren’t obligated to post funny stuff all the time.

    And thirdly to say, You explaining the throat closing problem made me remember the time I forced myself to the dentist which I fear with every fiber of my being and they took a mold of my teeth so they had a tray with putty stuff they put in my mouth which was eerily similar to the one someone stuck in the Winter Soldier’s mouth in Captain America before they brainwashed him and in short I don’t think the brainwashing worked as I’m still scared of the dentist.

  700. Jenny, you are being the adultest adult for getting this looked at. I had half my thyroid out about 8 years ago due to a multi-nodal goitre, that yes, put pressure on my windpipe and other things. It was the EASIEST surgery I’ve ever had (and believe me, I’ve had a few). It (the goitre) was completely benign. The best part? I can swallow better, my voice is less raspy, and IT CURED MY SLEEP APNEA.

    It is completely normal to be freaked out about this.

    You will be OK.

  701. I am sending you lots of good energy. I had my thyroid out a few years ago because it was wrapping around my caratid artery. Very easy southerly with fast recovery. And even when your serious, your still funny

  702. My boss, 39 years old, had her thyroid removed this past year and is doing great! Walking around, talking and breathing and all that shit. Totally not dead at all.

    Sending you all the healing energy I can muster. When I do this for people I envision clasping hands with them, like in Practical Magic when they form the banishing circle at the end and join hands and they are all glowing and magical. Minus the banishing an asshole ghost part. More giving energy, less asshole banishing. Lots of glowing. Magical dahling.

  703. Nurse here. First, in your case it is less hypochondria and more just experience with a body that frequently tries to kill you. A bit of paranoia is justified here, I think. That said, I doubt the lump in your neck will kill you any faster than any of the other stuff that has so far failed in every attempt to take you down. Thyroid is manageable, biopsy is sort of cool to watch, and getting it removed just involves one more pill to swallow so completely doable.

  704. Well, it just sucks having to worry while waiting for test results. Been there. But you’re doing a heckuva job adulting! My brother had part of his thyroid removed, and is just fine. Hang in there. Sending peaceful, healing thoughts your way.

  705. My friend had her thyroid removed when she was really young and has a kick ass scar that looks like she had her throat slit. Sure, adult scars will probably be smaller, but still THINK OF THE STORIES YOU COULD MAKE UP!

  706. It’s very common to have thyroid lumps for the ladies. I felt a tiny bump and it grew into a 4cm mass over two years. I did three fine needle test and they all turn out negative. I thought about all the types of cancer I might have and it’s pointless to ask you not to think about it. You will be fine.

  708. Hi, sweetie. Being a grown-up fuckin sucks, but you’re being ultra-responsible to get this checked out. It’s probabl just swollen glands or something, but my brain gets googling before I can stop it. Maybe you have a marshmallow stuck. Have you been drinking hot cocoa lately? Sending positive vibes, and tons of love. Can’t wait to hear it’s no big deal. 💚

  709. My friend had something very similar. It turned out to be a specific type of cyst. No cancer they are just keeping an eye on it to see if it will go away on its own otherwise they may remove it. She named it Ethyl and I sometimes get random texts saying “Ethyl is angry today”. You got this, it will all be ok. But whatever you do don’t use Dr Google. According to Dr Google it’s probably either common cold or syphallis ; )

  711. I’m glad your Doctor’s on top of this. I’m hoping it’s something minor and easy to deal with. Keep us posted. You know we’re all rooting for you!!

  712. You are being so responsible about this! I’ve had a crap ton of medical issues this year, and I’m SO sick of being a patient… but I have a family, so I suck it up and go. So did you. That’s hard, and I’m here to give you a big pat on the back. And good vibes. And a hug.

    Also. My mother in law had her thyroid out a couple months ago. It wasn’t a big deal. Now she takes one pill a day, and I can’t even see the scar. She’s totally fine.

    YOU WILL BE OK!❤️!

  713. Sending you all the good thoughts I have! I haven’t had my thyroid removed (mine just doesn’t work right), but a coworker had hers removed. She’s fine. It might have turned her into a Cat Lady, though.

  714. So I’ve not had my thyroid out but I am a surgeon who takes thyroids out! What I can tell you is that even if it was cancer most thyroid cancers have an amazing prognosis and are very very curable. And odds are it’s not if it’s been coming on so quickly antway but rather goiter. The surgery is done all the time, you get to go home within 24 hrs most of the time and the neck actually scars really really well so most people don’t even notice it! Every surgery is serious and scary but I promise this one s something a lot of people are really great at and do all the time. If you have any questions I can always answer, but I bet you’ll be just fine 😋

  715. I had a lump on my thyroid years ago. It was not cancer but had to be removed due to the size. I had a fear of dying by decapitation (some irresponsible adult allowed me to watch the movie Witchboard when I was 7 years old and really messed me up) so you can imagine my terror at the thought of them slicing my neck. But, have no fear my dear, my head did not fall off! The surgery was not awful and cannot even see a scar. You will be ok.

  716. I have lived without a thyroid for just over 10 years due to thyroid cancer. There were ups and downs in the beginning trying to get my levels right (still happens every now and then), but generally speaking, I don’t even think about it anymore. My scar is practically invisible and doctors have come a long way even in just the last 10 years in how they treat thyroid cancer and other thyroid problems. You will be okay!

  717. So only to add a little brevity but I had to re-read this a few times bc I thought you said “have my typhoid removed” and I couldn’t figure out why that would be bad. But then was also confused about how you got typhoid in your throat and actually googled that shit, then got curious if typhoid and thyroid had a similar Latin derivative and now I’m just a freak. 😉

  718. I had my thyroid out and it wasn’t the most fun thing I’ve ever done, but it wasn’t terrible. The biopsies were normal, but my thyroid was so big it felt like somebody had their fingers on my throat and was pushing down just enough to make me really uncomfortable. And maybe I’m weird, but I kind of enjoyed walking around for a few months looking like I’d fought a guillotine and the guillotine lost. Also, I feel loads better on the synthetic thyroid hormone, because my thyroid was probably sick for a while and now the doctors can just fine tune things as needed to keep me energetic and doing cool things, like getting out of bed in the morning and having a productive day.

  719. Since the lump seemed to come on suddenly, that makes me (just an adult, not a medical person) think that it’s not likely to be cancer.
    Given your history, it absolutely makes sense to get it checked out. Better safe than sorry!
    I hope you get accurate results quickly, and that your next steps are smooth and effective.

  720. Dear Bloggess,
    It is not easy putting yourself out there when it is not your usual funny post, so thank you for posting this.
    People do not talk a lot about the Thyriod and what it controls. Like everything, so when it is off, enlarged, or removed, you feel different. But know there is a light at then of the tunnel. I was having issues back in 2012 that were similar to what you stated in your blog. Lumps and such but I was going to ignore everything because when you work, have children and are married, it is hard to find time for you sometimes. With that said, I did go to the doctor and learned that I would need my Thyriod needed to be removed. I live north of Boston so I went into the city and met with an incredible surgeon who promised me that I would be okay. So, in 2013 I had my surgery, the recovery was quick. The scar healed beautifully and most importantly I started to feel “normal” again. It took a few medication changed but I bounced back.
    I wish you all good, healthy wishes and know you Will be okay.
    Sending hugs and love,
    Caroline G.

  721. I have totally had the full throat feeling! Totally stinks! You will be fine, and you did the right thing. One thing I found was that if I held my jaw a bit open (lips still closed) in an effort to give myself more room, it actually made me hold my tongue in such a way that it made things much worse! Discovering that keeping my jaw closed was better was a game changer. Your milage may vary.

  722. I had the whole left side and 1/4 of the right side of my thyroid removed several years ago. The swelling had gotten big enough that I couldn’t sleep on my right side because it would press on my windpipe. The concept of how icky it is to have your neck operated on is the worst part. Recovery from the surgery went like this: the first day I felt like I had been hit by a semi, the second by a large Ryder truck, the third by a 15-person van, the fourth by an SUV and the fifth by a bike. The scar fades quickly into the folds of your skin if you’re good about using sunscreen and massaging it with lotion (highly recommend Kiehl’s products for this). You will survive this. You’ve been through worse. 🙂 <3

  723. I checked in today to see if there was an update. I have no personal experience with this, but I’m guessing it’s hella scary. Take care of yourself, we’re all sending love and light.

  724. I had a similar experience earlier this year. It started with difficulty swallowing (especially rice, for some reason) and then when hiking I just about passed out due to being unable to get enough oxygen into my lungs. I went to the doctor thinking that the difficulty catching my breath was due to a lingering congestion in my lungs from a cold I had earlier in the year. She sent me for an xray which revealed that my trachea had a serious bend in it from the pressure of my thyroid pushing on it. Then it was on to an ultrasound (yep there were some very large nodules on my thyroid and then needle biopsies of the biggest ones (ugh). Luckily all were benign, but then it was on to surgery.

    The surgery was done outpatient since they only needed to remove one lobe (a lobectomy!). The doctor comes in beforehand to mark up your neck – he tries to make the incision in an existing wrinkle line in your neck (I asked if he could tighten up my neck while he was at it, but he had no sense of humor! 🙂 Bottom line, the surgery was easy peasy (recovering from the anesthesia was the only hard part) – there were only 4 stitches, the rest of the incision was held together with surgi-strips. It’s been less than 6 months since the surgery and you cannot even see the incision. I made sure to use moisturizer on the incision (I like Palmers Cocoa Butter) and it’s like it never happened.

    And it also looks like the lobe that was left has taken over all of the duties of the one that was taken out, so at this point I don’t even have to take any medication to make up for the lobe taken out.

    Sorry for the long post, but I wanted to share my experience with you to hopefully ease your mind. At first the thought that a doctor would have to cut my neck was quite disconcerting, to say the least. However, after my surgery, I couldn’t believe how many people I know have had similar surgeries; some just partial and some the whole thyroid removed. Every single one of them had absolutely no problems.

    It’s nice to be able to get a full lung-full of air and swallow without difficulty. I am glad that I had it taken care of. Best of luck and I will be sending you many positive thoughts – I am happy to share more with you if it would be helpful!

  725. Jenny, my mom had her thyroid removed back in the mid-1950s, when the Mayo Clinic was the only place in the world that could perform that operation. She took thyroid pills all her life and was fine. You will be fine, too!

  726. Good job adulting, you are doing just what you are supposed to do. You will be okay. I’m affirming all good things that you need are yours.

  727. This is what I need said to me when I’m freaking out.

    You’re fine.
    You will be fine.
    This is normal.
    It will be ok.

  728. They’ll sort it out. They’re good at that. As for your emotional well-being, being okay is overrated. Just keep being, watch your daughter be amazing and brilliant, and continue to drive Victor insane.

    I showed a friend your bear head post, and I thought he was going to die laughing. I still laugh at the bear looking in the bedroom window from outside.

  729. Hi Jenny. It’s perfectly reasonable to be worried, but you’re doing what you need to by getting it checked out. Keep pushing until you have your answers, we have faith you will persevere.

  731. My thyroid wasn’t removed, but we killed it with radiation. I consider it my neck Godzilla. I was radioactive for a few days, and couldn’t go near people or animals, but the tremor in my hands that was there for decades went away. It just means daily meds to replace the hormones. Best case through worst case scenarios, you’ve got this. And the support of all of us.

  732. Jenny,
    I have been a nurse 40 years . You WiLL be fine. Fear is amplified this time of year. I dont get mamnagrams in december anymore Found myself fretting too much. Good luck honey

  733. Sending you love and good thoughts. You are not a hypochondriac and are very adulty for getting it checked out. Gold star for that. Your book Furiously Happy was such a help to me. Fingers crossed this is nothing serious.

  734. You have all the good thoughts I can muster! Going in for a Dr. to check you out is the best, smartest, and most adult thing you can do. Have a brother-in-law who had to have his thyroid removed going on ten years ago. He is doing fine!

  736. As a Hashimoto’s survivor, removing your thyroid can be a blessing. I went from constant pain and anxiety about the rate my body was failing to and near reset. Yes I still have the damage and have to deal with what it’s doing to me. but at least I am no longer fighting the Hashimoto’s attacking me too. RIP that sucker out!

  737. I have hypothyroidism. Turns out my thyroid was working over time and it caused a goiter by my thyroid. I had it drained at the doctors office and they sent the fluid off to the lab. Turns out it was not cancer just a fluid filled goiter. Hope it turns out the same for you. Sending good thoughts your way.

  738. Sending you a big basket of good thoughts and hugs, with a side of cookies and booze. Hope you and your family have very happy holidays.

  741. You are going to be totally okay. I am a doctor and I saw TONS of thyroid removal surgeries when I was in med school, they all went fine…and I was in med school in the boonies! Plus, cancer doesn’t grow that fast.

    Sending good thoughts.

  742. I’m sorry Jenny. But I truly believe you will be fine. My mom had her thyroid removed many, many, years ago and was just fine. She just took synthroid to get her to the right level of whatever it is that comes from the thyroid. I was so hypothyroid about 10 years ago that I slept all the time and had absolutely zero interest in anything, period. They thought that it was because I was depressed because my dad had died shortly before then so I went to the Doctor. And miraculously she decided to run a TSH test and it came back 96! That is an absolutely ridiculous number. But I got on synthroid and in less than a week it was like the best anti-depressant you could imagine. I wish they had antidepressents that worked that well for regular depression. And if I should have to have my thyroid removed for any reason, I am not afraid of it at all and I don’t think it’s something to worry about. I’d be happy if they were removing it if it felt like I was choking a little all the time. It is quite reasonable and normal to be concerned and have anxiety over this. But I think that you will be pleasantly surprised that they can take care of it much easier than you think. And I sincerely send all the healing thoughts I can that your symptoms will go away soon. —Susie
    P.s. I am 63 and can’t believe how many little, but annoying things (like arthritis) are creeping up on me. And I have to keep letting them be and not worry, although I do. Especially since when you get older, they just say it’s because you are getting older, and that’s that. In other words, they mostly just blow you off. I’d kind of like to at least know somewhat specifically why each thing is happening but “you’re getting older” is the diagnosis and stock answer. So am I a hypochondriac, or are they not paying attention. Who knows? I try to live by the immortal words of Alfred E. Neuman “what, me worry?

  743. You are doing the right thing. When you get the news (that it’s nothing) let us know. Sending hugs from Phoenix!

  744. You are fine, and I’m praying for you. You are not alone, and you are an inspiration to many of us. I know several people who had their thyroid removed, and they are just fine. Stand firm, and make your doctors check you, no matter how small or silly you think the problem may be.

  745. I had an enlarged Thyroid that was starting to make swallowing difficult. But I had other symptoms so was about to go in for the radioactive testing — but on a hunch I checked to see if I was pregnant, which I couldn’t possibly be because we’d given up after 3 years of fertility treatments and the doctor saying it would never happen. Lucky that I went with my hunch cuz that would have been bad for the baby. She’s 18 now. My Thyroid returned to normal after the pregnancy. Praying your Thyroid issues resolve easily. Now about that pregnancy thing…

  746. I am now 71 and had my thyroid removed because of a lump that refused to go away. Actually I had two surgeries at UCSF in San Francisco. Dr. Duh, who was fantastic then, did both surgeries and now my thyroid resides in some jar in the city. Oh yes, it was cancerous, but that was 17 years ago so it wasn’t too bad. Although I was really tired for a few months Anyway, I LOVE your writing and everything you put your extremely funny mind to. I will write more later because I am a high school crisis counselor and see lots of use for your work on depression and anxiety, because there are a crapton of 11 to 18 year olds who are really sad and depressed. Thanks for what you do.

  749. Sending you love and lots of good thoughts! Scary stuff is scary, but there’s lots of people to hold your hand thru the scary bits and beyond

  750. Here’s hoping that things are better or betterer or even bettererer soon. Nope, I’m not going to do the same with “soon”. Just count yourself as lucky that I’m not saying anything about “thy ‘roid”.

  751. I have had thyroid cancer and had my thyroid removed. I am fine, it was fine, and I had two types of cancer growing in my thyroid. They removed one live at 19 and then years later at 37 I had my completion surgery. I take Synthroid forever and get blood work yearly. If it turns out to be cancer, thyroid cancer is a pretty ok cancer to have. Love ya!

  752. Send you every positive vibe I can. You are sadly like my family. We can’t catch a break either. It is one thing after another. It’s hard managing life when you are constantly on the emotional rollcoaster of hell. Sorry, that was a bit dramatic. Take time to heal and rest. Everything is going to be okay. The world isn’t ready to be without you.

  753. So here’s the deal… IIIFFFF this turns out to be cancer, this type—area—is highly treatable. I have a friend who has TWELVE cancerous growths removed from her neck. That was THIRTY years ago and she’s doing great!!
    Also two other friends went through cancer in their throat just bit as dramatic a story! Tons of best wishes coming your way!!

  754. Jenny, you are doing great! You adultwd very good, you didn’t let this take control of you AND you reached out to the interwebs for love and support!!!

    Sorry im late to your neck party, but you got this!

    Don’t worry about the small stuff, get this fixed and go to the next one…

  756. As someone who went years getting sicker and sicker and insisting it was “just a gall bladder problem”, only to find out I had stage 3 ovarian cancer… I’m glad you’re getting it checked out. Also, even if it turns out to be something bad, I promise, you can do this. Cancer sucked, but dying would’ve sucked more, so I got through it and I just celebrated my third year of remission!

  757. You’re going to be ok. Promise. Even if it comes to getting your thyroid out. All the women in my family get tyroid disease; my aunt got hers out a couple years ago due to cancer and is doing awesome now. I’m sendng you good vibes and hopes that you’ll be more comfortable soon.

  758. It could easily be nothing. But, since you asked, I had half my thyroid removed nearly thirty years ago and it was not a big deal. They put the incision in a crease in my neck that was already there, and you couldn’t see it even right after it healed. I was back at work less than a week later. You got this. We’re all taking turns praying for you, then RBG, then you, then RBG.

  759. I’ve had two relatives have their thyroids removed and both are better for it. One you can’t even see a scar. Neither were cancerous. Me—I have Graves Disease so I keep that lump in the throat. Medication keeps it “in normal range.” Have had it for 16 years now and still okay. You’re gonna be fine. You’ve weathered so much worse than this. Sending you much love and cyber hugs!

  760. It’s probably fine. A friend of mine had a lump like that & started planning for her demise. Turned out it wasn’t even a bad thyroid issue – it was the start of a regular, old fashioned goiter.

    Best of luck! Don’t let this ruin your holidays!

  761. I was at work and felt a lump in my throat while I was admitting a patient. One referral to a specialist later, I had a ultrasound guided aspiration of my neck – it was a benign goiter. Very common for folks like me who have autoimmune thyroiditis -or any thyroid problem really. Basically all I have to do is go in every year or two to have another ultrasound done to check on the size of the goiter. I was already taking levothyroxine. I’ve had it for about 5 years and haven’t had any issues.

  762. As a fellow hypochondriac, I’ll share this story with you. I always try to remind myself not to be the bear.

    And you are being very grown up by getting it checked out instead of ignoring it.

  763. Hi Jenny, I had my thyroid removed in May of this year and I can honestly say that it’s not a big deal. I was freaked out about the surgery but it went off without a hitch, and if the thyroid is dodgy then it will be gone and done. 99.9% recovery if it’s dodgy. By dodgy I mean cancer. I have to take thyroid replacement pills everyday for the rest of my life but it’s a small annoyance. It’s not a problem and after a couple weeks I felt fine.

    You got this!

    Craig

  765. You are the first person I tell people to follow. You make me laugh everyday. I am sending you a million hugs and all the best thoughts. Think positive you have a ton of people here for you.

  766. That happened to my daughter when she had mono at 16, the lump was the size of a fucking grapefruit & her throat was closing up, so I’m glad you went to the doctor. Seems like you must have something different though. They gave her steroids and it went away and never came back. Unfortunately, her case of mono was so bad that it totally fucked up her immune system, and she’s been suffering with a variety of weird shit ever since – which is about 20 years now.

    I sincerely hope this goes completely away and you never have to worry about it again. Wishing you all the best, a great holiday & the best year ever in 2019.

  767. I hope you have a thyroid problem because although they are hard to diagnose, they are easy to fix. The worst part is not knowing what is wrong. So I wish you a quick, accurate diagnosis. Hang in there. Hugs!

  768. I had my thyroid removed when I was 20 because of cancer. It was not fun…but it was definitely not the worst thing I have gone through. It has been 25 years. I ended up having 2 radiation treatments that were more boring than anything else (because you have to me in isolation). You are going to be just fine.

  769. Darling Jenny, you will be OK. I hope they figure out quick what’s going on so that they can tell you and you can stop worrying. I know not knowing is really hard. We all love you.

  770. Hi Jenny, I am a sure you will be ok. I am a bit worried about my health myself at the moment so I understand how terrifying it can be and how reassuring it can be, if someone tells you that everything will be fine. Even if they have no way of knowing. I am sending you positive thoughts from Ibiza, Spain and hope that you manage to enjoy the holidays!

  771. Stacy at #493, that’s interesting that you had voice changes, you’re the first one to mention that. I also lost the high range of my voice after surgery. The doc told me right after that it happened, so they were aware of this, apparently rare side effect. I did love to sing, was a Girl Scout Leader at the time, and, you know camp songs are popular. I still miss it, but being able to swallow is more valuable.
    Best wishes to Jenny and all the Bloggess Tribe for the holidays. For those who celebrate it, Merry Christmas! 🎄

  772. A few years ago I developed a cyst in my parathyroid and it felt just like you described. The doctors were like it’s fine it’s just a cyst and I was like IT FEELS LIKE I AM BEING STRANGLED. I was lucky and was able to find an ethanol treatment to shrink the cyst because it was only fluid filled. I hope what you have is something similar, because the procedure was easy and almost painless. Either way, sending a huge hug. The physical sensation and worry are pretty awful.

  774. I’m just going to say, I’m so glad there’s a ‘normal’ person out there that like me has so many health things going on. I mean, I am “healthy” but also have lots of conditions and I sometimes shy away from seeking health advice because I’m embarrassed to tell my family I have yet another “condition”. I’m afraid it comes off as attention seeking when no, I’m just a hypochondriac who has a diagnosis for everything that ailes me.

  776. A little late on the reply here, but wanted to weigh in. I’m hopeful that it is a weird thyroid thing and not cancer but, even if it is, you will be fine. I had my thyroid removed 8 years ago because if was cancer. Surgery was outpatient and recovery was fairly quick. I did have an excellent scar on my throat that grossed my kids out, but it healed very well. According to my mom, “It blends right in with your neck wrinkles.” (thanks mom). No need for chemo – all I had to do was take one dose of radioactive iodine and then be in seclusion for three days in the hospital because I was, in fact, radioactive.

    Now I take synthetic thyroid hormone once a day, and all is good.

    So, no matter how it goes, even if it is the worst case scenario, you will be fine. And you might get three days where all you can read, watch TV, eat and do whatever you want and no one can bug you because you are nuclear.

  777. I had my thyroid punched out of me in the parking lot of a Juke Joint. Got in a fight with a woman who said she was a Quaker but I don’t think she knows what Quaker means. It was fine, sewed it up before I sobered up. Took a couple of excedrine the next day. I mean sure I can longer speak french but my scar is bad ass. So if your afraid of surgery maybe just go pick a bar fight and lead with your neck. ; = )

  778. You are going to be okay. 🙂 You are not making it up, but you will be okay.
    Sending you all the love and positive healing energy! <3

  779. You ARE going to be ok. Even if they have to remove your thyroid. I had mine removed back in 1988 and I have been fine ever since. It was thyroid cancer but I am totally ok. I take thyroid medication every day. No big deal. Sending hugs!

  780. Wow the universe is funny. I’m reading your post because I am at home, recovering from having the second half of my thyroid removed and thought “Hey! Now I have time to see what’s going on over at the Bloggess!” Despite a slight scare during the recovery period, during which you aren’t supposed to lift more than 20 pounds but I was out walking my dog and there was a skunk and well, the dog weighs 40 pounds which feels really heavy when you are running with her away from a skunk after surgery, and I was SURE I had torn my stitches, everything has been really easy and fine. Stock up on some lozenges or whatever makes you feel better when you have a sore throat beforehand and all will be well 🙂

  781. I had a similar lump — I could feel it for a while and then I could see it in my neck. It was a cyst growing on my thyroid. Tried draining it, it came back. I had it removed with a portion of my thyroid. It went very very well. No more cysts. I have to look very very hard to even see a scar, I take some synthroid. All is well. Thyroids, when diagnosed with a problem, often seem to be easy to fix.

  782. Hi dear, I hope you doing better, what happen to you happen to many, don’t feel bad or discouraged, you are going to be ok, I will leave my blog down below maybe you want to take a look, I have experience doing ultrasounds, my blog is about obstetric and gynecologic ultrasounds, but I also have done before thyroid ultrasounds as well, any ways I hope this helps, let me know if you want to know anything.
    http://www.ultrasoundfeminsider.com

  783. Good thoughts sent, any normal person would be a bit worried. Can’t tell you anything about having a thyroid removed, but I did have some lymph nodes in my neck that went lumpy and weird. Removed surgically, nothing to worry about, so it could be that? I hope it’s that, or something equally benign.

  784. The doctors just found micro growths on my thyroid gland. It is unnerving, as they’re still investigating it. My advice is to soak in those positive thoughts. You are a beautiful person and I am praying for you! <3 Message me anytime!

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How the Hell Did I Not Know That?: Humorist Lucie Frost shares daily Instagram reels with learnings of the day—words, music, whatever–with plenty of laughs and all the curse words.

Beautiful Writers book: Writers! This coming-of-career memoir (w/ the BEST advice from celeb authors, real shit you haven’t heard) is life. A page-turning beach read doubling as how-to. #Magic

The Dating Days of Marta O: When I told my sister I was building a blog she said: “Do people still read blogs?” I do not know, but if YOU want to read it, here it is. Keep in mind, my stories about dating after 40 are for the brave.

Where Do I Belong? A memoir of Sarah Carrington: The unbelievable story of growing up in a religious cult in the mountains of Northern British Columbia. What happens to you in life doesn’t make you strong; rising above it does.

CONNECTED: A Personal Journal for Ketamine Therapy Created by writer & patient Katherine Davis for this powerful clinical treatment. If considering ketamine for major depression, check out this essential tool.

Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh: SO GOOD.

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