Just a follow up to this Twitter post…
…which elicited concerns of “God, I really hope it’s not you, Jenny” until I realized this issue and followed it up with this:
And that elicited responses if “yeah, it could’ve gone either way with you honestly” and also, “How is Miss Dorothy now?” And the answer is that after many tests they don’t really know why she’s been sick but the doctor suspects it’s bc “dogs are just weird sometimes” and so she’s on a bunch of meds which have helped a bit but then last night at 3am she woke me up whining and I could see the look of imminent diarrhea panic on her face so I jumped up to take her outside bc if she gets sick in the house she tries to run away from the diarrhea, which doesn’t work and just leaves lines of poo on the tile like a treasure map no one wants and as soon as I opened the bedroom door Dottie FLEW down the stairs but as she leapt off the last stair she landed in an actually impressive hunched Spider-Man crouch and immediately shot out the most enormous turd ever. And then she ran to the door bc she wasn’t finished so I took her out and when I got back all of the cats were gathered around the turd like they were summoning a terrible demon and they looked at me like, “WTF, dude?” and I didn’t know what to tell them because I couldn’t tell if they were impressed or disgusted.
And that’s pretty much how my whole weekend went.