A lot of people sent me this clipping about an auction that was filled with 104 taxidermied animals, and I saw the bear photo and said, “THAT BEAR WANTS TO COME LIVE WITH US.” Victor disagreed.
I assumed that he disagreed because of the gross, bloody trout and I explained that if Herbert was mine I would toss the fish and make it into a bear that could hug me. And then whenever I was feeling down I could snuggle into the bear and he’d be like “There, there, little bunny. You’re gonna be just fine. Let me love you.” Then Victor said we didn’t have any room for Herbert because he doesn’t understand that there’s always room for love. But then I read a little further and decided that Victor was right because I really only collect taxidermied animals who died of natural causes or were older than me and Herbert didn’t qualify. It was a sad morning. But then Victor gave me a hug and said “There, there, little bunny. You’re insane but I still love you.” And that was almost as good as a Herbert hug.
Almost.
PS. I made an image to show Victor how Herbert would look without the fish because Victor has very little imagination when it comes to dead bears comforting you. And I thought you might need it. You’re welcome.
