So yesterday Victor flew back home early because my favorite portrait artist ever was having an special artist talk in Austin and he wanted to take me to it, and I was like, “I LOVE HER. But I don’t want to leave the house and I’m afraid of small talk and can we just skip this party and go see her art next week when there aren’t a ton of people at the gallery?” and he was like, “No. Stop being weird. We’re leaving the house and seeing real people” so I was like, “Fine. But I’m hiding in the back and I’m not wearing makeup or dressing up so I can blend in with the walls.” And then we get there and when I walk in I see the artist (Sara Scribner) and she’s in the middle of a talk with all these people and she waves at me and I notice people staring at me even more than normal and I was like, “Am I bleeding? Is there a bird in my hair?” and I’m trying to blend back into a corner and Victor keeps staring at me and I was like, “WHAT IS YOUR DEAL?” but I did it with my eyes because I didn’t want to talk out loud and then I looked over and saw me on the wall and I was like, WTF?
And I thought, “Hang on. Is that a portrait of me on a gallery wall?” Because it totally looks like me when my friend Maile did a photo shoot of me a few years ago but then I was like, Why would I be in a portrait? That can’t be me. MY GOD, JENNY, YOU ARE SUCH A NARCISSIST. But turns out it was me because Victor contacted Sara and commissioned her to do the painting to surprise me. And it was awesome and lovely because my favorite portrait artist did my portrait, but also, I was living that moment when you try to hide from everyone at a party that I was too scared to go to and then I find a painting of me in a spotlight, which is exactly the opposite of hiding at an art show. And I told Victor thank you, and that he really knew me and also didn’t fucking know me at all and he agreed. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.