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Where the hell am I?

Tomorrow I leave to visit Utah for the first time, as I was asked by several Mormons to be an Ignite speaker about “anything that you’re passionate about.  Your choice.”  Most people are already cringing at the terrible repercussions of letting me speak about anything I want, but when I told them I wanted to have a live drill for the zombie apocalypse they were all, “Huh.  Rock on”.  Also, I sent them my power point presentation, which includes phrases like “Knock-knock, motherfucker”, and they didn’t even blink.  Because Mormons are awesome.  Unless you ask them to mix you a drink, which they will totally fuck up because they are terrible bartenders.  Anyway, my point is that I will be at Evo ’11 for most of this week and if you’re going to be there too (and are good at shuffling and moaning) you should let me know.

PS.  I’m also co-hosting the 5th annual People’s Party at Blogher this year.  As always, I will be hiding in the bathroom the entire time, as my anxiety disorder has never actually allowed me to attend any of the parties I’ve hosted.  This is not an exaggeration.  Also, I think I’m supposed to be writing a post about this but I’m way too irresponsible to do that.  I’d feel worse about that but it’s fairly obvious that I’m not responsible enough to be expected to follow the rules.

PPS.  The bad-ass Mormons hosting Evo ’11 are the same ones who were there when I was crowned Czar by the Mayor, and who were unfazed when I was attacked by a feral baby on stage.  They totally know what they’re getting into. Probably.  Either way, it should make for an interesting post when I get back.

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