I got an email from someone who wanted me to come to “a very important social media conference” and at the end he wrote “THE KING IS COMING!” Then I wrote back, “Elvis is coming?” and he was like “I’m sorry. Who?” And I explained that he’d said that the king was coming to the event and that I happened to have it on good authority that Elvis had been dead for quite some time, and then he explained that “THE KING IS COMING!” obviously referred to the true king, Jesus Christ. So then I was like “Jesus is coming to your social media conference? How did you swing that?” and then he explained that “THE KING IS COMING!” is just his auto-signature and didn’t refer to the conference at all, and I told him that it was very nice auto-signature but that some people might suspect that he was advertising Jesus and/or Elvis as being attendees and that he might want to reword it so he didn’t get sued. I also asked him why some people referred to Jesus as The King, because it seems like his Dad would be The King since he’s the main dude in charge, so technically wouldn’t Jesus be a Prince? Except that “Prince Jesus” doesn’t really have a nice ring to it, and it sounds like something Disney would try to make into a musical. But then he never responded.
And this is probably why I so seldom get invited to events.
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And in other news, it’s time for the weekly wrap-up:
What you missed in my shop (Named “Eight pounds of uncut cocaine” so that your credit card bill will be more interesting.):
- “Magnificent misfit.” You really are, you know. And that’s a wonderful thing.
What you missed on the internets:
- Kick-ass stuff I pinned.
- Bunches of people asking if I’ve seen the new Walter Potter taxidermy book. I have and I’ve reviewed it.
- I was on the news. Sort of.
This week on shit-I-didn’t-come-up-with-but-wish-I-did-because-it’s-kind-of-awesome:
- Unfinished Scripts. It takes incredible talent to be this awful.
- Now I want one.
- Girls Who Read