I have to laugh or I’ll cry

Today I had my first “Snapple” ever.   Under the cap?


Good one, God.

PS.  Did you know that there isn’t a word for fear of giant squid but there is one for fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth?  It’s a fucked-up world, people.

45 replies. read them below or add one

  1. There’s a squid behind you, Jenny.

    PS) Wish I could have been at Blogher. I would have loved to have met you, you lovely thing, you.

  2. Jenny, you know how to get rid of a fear of squid, right?

    It’s called “calamari”.



  3. You need to get more people scared of them so the shrinks can create a phobia for it. Mind you I can’t imagine there are more folks scared of body odour than giant squid, yet there’s one for that!

    Also, Menophobia is not the fear of men.

  4. All squids want to do is show you love, Jenny. And wrap their multiple sucky arms around you. And never let go.

  5. Oh Jenny…they’re coming for ya. I think these news stories and Snapple lids are cleverly disguised threats from the dark side of the sea. 😉

  6. Who is afraid of garlic? I’m going to be at that list all night, obsessing.

  7. Also, Melissophobia: not fear of me.

  8. Well, aren’t you glad there wasn’t any calamari at any of those cocktail parties? That’s some consolation, right?

    btw, I miss your face, lady. It was so wonderful to meet you!

  9. My son has a toy squid which he plays with, but the giant ones? Ugggh.

    I just want to know what happens when you have Sesquipedalophobia (fear of long words) and have to tell someone your diagnosis?

  10. oh shit…that is soooooo funny hehe

    i know, i would totally NOT be laughing if it were me, but really, the irony is just too perfect…

  11. I laughed, Jenny. I couldn’t help myself! This shit could only happen to you, you know.

    P.S. Did you ever find out if they have squid in Lake Michigan?

  12. So what giant tuna did you piss off to send the squid after you?

    Spamboy, stop making me pee, darn it!

  13. Seriously??? That is bizarre!!

  14. oh geez those squids really have it in for you!

  15. You are being stalked by squid. Scary. Also, I am frightened by Spamboy’s comment, and I’m not even scared by squid.

  16. You live an exciting life, Jen!

  17. I’m glad I live inland.

  18. dude. embrace the squid.

  19. Um. I hate to be the one to break the news, but I do believe it is fate you will one day be eaten by a giant squid.

    I’m sorry. 🙁

  20. There is a God….and he’s watching you.

  21. may I suggest :”calimariphobia”? it slides off the tongue like a slippery squid tentacle.

    someone contact Websters.

  22. They are watching you…

  23. It’s all part of The Grand Conspiracy. There’s enough to go around for all of us.

    Snapple is just a vessel of reminder.

  24. Oh my god I didn’t need to know that. Or think about that. Or picture that. I’m totally having nightmares tonight.

    I’m also a little surprised about some of the things on the list.. like cats (Elurophobia) I mean.. there’s a word for people who are afraid of cuddly furry things, but not big slimey creepy things?

  25. So you’re saying giant volleyball-sized squid eyeballs creep you out? Wuss.

  26. Architeuthiophobia. Just a thought. But I did see this page, maybe they can help you out!

  27. I’m laughing so hard I’m crying – does that count?

  28. That’s just a scary thought, and I am not particularly scared of squid. Volleyballs? Screw that.

  29. That could only happen to you.

    Squidiphobia would be too obvious. Squishy-phobia, now that sounds about right.

  30. dude. that’s freaking nuts. nuts i tell you.

  31. I’d think there would be a word for fear of squid. A close friend fears them, the fear brought on by seeing a photo of the largest ever recovered giant squid. It’s beak was just too much to bear for her. (Which is great, because now I can torture her by using the evocative phrase “squid hole”)

  32. ew.

    I have to say that I like how this is a “Real Fact” as opposed to, you know, just plain fact…

  33. You crack me up! It is a fucked up world, volley ball eye squids included in that assessment!

  34. Oh my God!


    I cannot believe your squid karma. It is a mysterious thing.

  35. Oh, dear lord. I did not know that. Guess that Snapple was also your last. I don’t think I’ve ever had one… I think I’ll adopt your squid outlook, maybe.

  36. Aaron started talking about giant octopuses coming and squishing houses. God I hope he doesn’t have your magic squid/octopi insight.

    (Glad that Victor is doing well.)

  37. Guess what I just ran across?


  38. Even without the phobia that is the most random ice tea cap I’ve ever seen.

  39. the only thing I can add to the giant squid
    thing is that well I dont really have anything
    to say appart from the fact that it is a boring
    convesation topic shall we talk abount a safety
    pin ,[much more interesting]

  40. Hah, I found this site looking for a work for my Squid phobia. Brrr. EVIL things. There was a BBC documentary saying that in a few hundred thousand years they may evolve to walk upon the land. I hope nobody finds out the secret to eternal life while I am about I do NOT want to see that day!

  41. 44
    Chronic procrastinator

    Love your blogs 🙂

    Fear of squids is called Octophobia. Though it is quite odd that out of that long list of strange phobias, there wasn’t a word for a fear of squids. Which is not all that odd.

    It’s very cruel that the word for a fear of long words is hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.

    And I found a website called squidsquid.com maybe you should avoid it haha.

  42. Just a time consuming list


Leave a Reply