You smell like a 5 year old


 I don’t know why anyone would pay money to smell like crayons unless maybe they’re trying to seduce 6 year olds. 

Of course, it could be worse.

PS.  That last link was sent in by a reader who would like to remain nameless because Mindy’s kind of shy like that.

29 thoughts on “You smell like a 5 year old

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I’ve never smelt this particular one but I the used to wear “Gin & Tonic” and a guy I worked with wore Dirt.

    I was trying to attract men with the dt’s and he was trying to attract dirty slappers.

  2. CROTCH?? Oh my jebus, wouldn’t that defeat the whole puropse behind my Summer’s Eve feminine deodorant spray?? Sure, my cootch smells like a field of friggin’ daisies, but my pulse points?? Oh, they smell like snatch!

  3. eeew, I remember my giant tin of crayons always smelled kind of sweaty – why do that on purpose? If someone could come up with toast-scented spray, I’d be all for it . . .

  4. Once again I bow to your genius Jenny.

    Although I do have to say opening up a browser window at work advertising “Crotch Scented Cologne” is a wee bit disturbing.

    I have to go talk to the boss now for some reason.

    I hope I don’t have to let him sniff me.

  5. I’ve heard of play-doh scented cologne before. But crotch smelling? Maybe they could come up with the “after-sex” smelling cologne. That could be a big turn on.

  6. I hate the smell of crayons. It always hints at the scent of body odor. Yuck.

    And crotch scented? I just…words escape me.

  7. Oh, those wacky Germans! What WILL they think of next?

    (Please, people of Germany. STOP THINKING.)

    In a related note, where the HELL do you FIND this stuff?

  8. So that means when I show up at home 4 hours late and smelling like whisky and pot I can just say it’s my new cologne? Where was this crap 20-years ago?

  9. I love play-doh too. The smell makes me happy. I think Karmyn has the sex thing down wrong. Smelling post-sex people just kinda gives me a little too much info. I have WAY too sensitive a nose.

    I must admit I wonder how the heck the chemists came up with the crotch and penis scents!

  10. I just finished watching the videos of people being asked to smell “Vulva.” Hilarious. Jenny, where do you find this stuff?

    As far as the fragrance goes, I think its creation was nothing but a ploy to watch women pee or something weird like that (since so many people said it smelled like urine). I’m sure you’ve heard about German “sex tourists” so I can only wonder about the German men who prefer to get their freak on domestically. I feel for German women.

  11. Don’t all crotches smell different? (Not that I would know from experience, no ma’am…). You know, pheromones unique to each individual, etc…?

    Just waxing philosophical.

    Crayons…nope. But PlayDoh scent intrigues me.

  12. Oh goody…perfume/cologne for child molesters. 😛
    As for other smells…Well, the cum does smell different from guy to guy (in varying degrees). No, I don’t go smelling on guys’ crotches. It’s knowledge I picked up at work once (no, I wasn’t prostituting at the time *lol*).

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