I’m tempted to do this whole post in caps. THAT’S HOW EXCITED I AM ABOUT IT.

in bizarre

Remember last week when I was trying to buy that dead pony I wanted? (I’ll just apologize for that first sentence right here if this is your first time here. You should probably just come back tomorrow.) Well I got outbid on it, but that was actually a blessing in disguise because then I found something I wanted even more that was just as awesome and also ethically taxidermied.

And a few minutes ago…it arrived.

Knock-knock, motherfucker.

That’s right, y’all.  Anyone can have a dead pony, but it takes a specially fucked up kind of birthday wish to end up with a dead pegasus.

(Special note for those of you who are horrified that I support the slaughter of pegasuses:  It’s actually a zebra colt mannequin covered with old, leftover cow and goose pieces.  You can tell because of the stitching and also because pegasuses are much bigger in real life.)

But don’t tell that to Hunter S. Thomcat:

It's like The Never Ending Story, part 12.

NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS, YOU GUYS.

 

672 thoughts on “I’m tempted to do this whole post in caps. THAT’S HOW EXCITED I AM ABOUT IT.”

Read comments below or add one.

  4. That second picture is quite possibly the best thing to ever wind up on the Internet. EVER.

  16. I’ve never been much for taxidermy (partly because I get a bit spooked by a dead animal staring at me and partly because my books take up the space that would be necessary for any other collection I could have) but this could possibly change my mind. This is officially one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen.

  23. HOLY CRAP. I want two. …also, my cat would have chewed the wings off within .3 seconds of it coming in the door.

  26. This really is the best taxidermied animal EVER!!!!

    Maybe they can get a part in the next Percy Jackson movie!

  33. Great. Now I’m going to have the Never-ending Story song in my head all day. Guess I’ll have to go watch it now. So…thanks!

  34. You’re going to be the ultimate Cat Lady. Except instead of live cats it’ll be taxidermied animals. Which probably smell better? I would assume?

  38. OH MY GOD I WANT ONE… I didn’t read you post I say the first picture I screamed that first sentence at my phone and I came to the comments. You have the best things. That is so much cooler than ta pony. Ok now I’m going to read your post

  41. you need to start selling tickets to your house of taxidermied animals… if Ripley’s Believe it or Not can… you definitely can!

  45. Oh wow. My eyes totally bugged out of my head when I scanned down to the picture. That is a freaking pegasus!! I couldn’t imaging anything better than a stuffed (historical) pony and you totally gave it to me.

    Is it bad that I really wish I could come over and ride it?

  48. The only thing I can think of is where on God’s green earth do you find something like that for sale?!? I just can’t imagine that someone had that in their attic and decided one day to sell it on the internet. It boggles my mind. But the picture with Hunter is way to cute! Gotta love a cat on a minature pegasus.

  50. It’s always a bit sad when you see that a Pegasus died so young.

    Unless, of course you’ve ever had one crap on your windshield.

  52. That is MUTHERFUCKING PROOF dreams come true. Yours, Hunter S. Thomcat’s, and those of everyone else who can now view this splendor thanks to the internetz.

    Also, if you’re looking for a little editoral advice, I TOTALLY would’ve put the whole thing in caps. TOTALLY.

  56. OMG! Its a fucking pegasus!! Thats like a pony to the nth power!
    (pony x wings)nth = pegasus
    Now I want one.

  59. What does Victor say?! You must tell us because I can’t begin to imagine how amazing his response will be!

  60. OK, I am now giggling like a complete and utter … well, muffin.

    Everything you do is the best thing, but this is also the best thing.

  63. The picture of Hunter riding the Pegasus is officially the most awesome thing I have ever seen on the internet. You win!
    (My spell check is insisting that Pegasus is a proper noun, and how can I argue with that?)

  65. Dude, that looks nothing like a taun taun. First a pegasus…what next? If you find a unicorn, I’m going to be SO jealous. More so than I am now. And where does one even FIND a zebra colt mannequin to cover with leftover cow and goose pieces?

  67. I am so jealous! As a child, my two favorite animals were 1) Unicorns and 2) Pegasus. I need one!

  71. OMG! Your deliveries should come with smelling salts and a bottle of whiskey for Victor! Poor man! How did he take the news of your latest obsession? And was that the reason your credit card was temporarily frozen? And just for the record….I love your birthday too! Waiting to see what you got is all kinds of fun!

  72. I hope you are training Hunter to wear costumes – the ONLY thing that would make this photo better is aviator goggles and a leather cap!

  73. Love x 100000000000!!!!!!!

    Can’t wait to hear the name!

    Only name I can think of right now is Andre Pegassi

  74. OMG, the vegetarian in me is trying not to think of all the random animals that have gone into making it but it is SO CUTE!

  81. I clicked on the link for this and my first reaction was
    Oh
    My
    GOD!
    I can only imagine the squeals of glee emanating from your house. I’m surprised we didn’t hear them up here.

    (Also? I’m sorry you weren’t at BlogHer this year, although I would imagine you’re exhausted after all the book touring.)

  82. You are uh-mazing.
    I am so very heartened that there are people in our tribe making it happen like this.
    Also, my inner 11 year-old is squealing with glee, while my outer 37 year-old is seething with envy, as well as a touch of awe.
    Jenny, you are the shiznit.

  83. THAT’S SO FRIGGIN’ AWESOME!

    … but shouldn’t that be “Pegasi”?

  84. Holy Shit Cakes!!!!!! I love it!!! I have got to get a bigger place so I can start filling it up with awesome shit too! The only downside is that my hubby would try to out do me!

  87. Dear Victor,
    You totally need to pose with the dead pegasus. It’s the only way to save your soul.
    Love,
    Me

  90. Every day I love that cat more and more. Didn’t think it was possible for that to happen with a pet that isn’t even mine.

  91. Beats the pony! Hands down! Love it! And it doesn’t look creepy like dead stuffed animals sometimes can…

  92. Before I clicked the link on facebook, I actually said out loud: “Oh for fuck’s sake, what did she do now?” LOL. I love it.

  93. You can tell it’s a fake because it exists. Real Pegasi don’t exist. That’s how you identify them.

    Please name him Horse Feathers. If not, Duck Soup.

    Hello, Jenny the Bloggess.

  96. ooh wow. that is hands down the best thing ever! my 7 y/o daughter would absolutely fucking die if i could get my hands on one of those for her birthday.

  97. Holy mother of awesome! A PEGASUS! All I got for Christmas last year was a sparkly pink and white pirate pegasus stuffed animal AND YOURS IS WAY COOLER

  98. Holy. Balls. If I lived closer to you, I would obsessively contact you, in hopes that you’d whore out your pegasus for newborn pictures. I mean, what would be more awesome than a newborn craddled on the back of an OBVIOUSLY nurturing baby pegasus?

  99. OMG OMG OMG How amazingly wonderfully incredible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  104. Best. Photo. Ever. Thank you for entertaining me! Plus, you totally make me seem like the lamest mother of all time. My kiddo wants one now too. Awesome.

  105. You know, until I started reading your blog, I didn’t even know this sort of thing even existed!

    Thanks for the eye-opening experiences!

  109. This is seriously……….I don’t even know. I’m speechless. Pretty sure the word I’m trying to think of hasn’t been invented yet.

    SQUEE!

  111. I am so confused right now… and mesmerised… and awed… which brings me full circle to confused again. That is AWESOME!

  113. Please name it Atreyu. Also, i said I’d be at the toronto book signing but I have a baseball tournament that starts tomorrow. Sorry buddy! Good luck and eat th Timbits!

  120. I was so curious to see what could possibly beat out the dead pony and OMG this is so much better!
    when do you start booking the travelling circus? cause this shit, your growing collection of dead awesome, should totally travel. BOOK IT!

  122. That second pic looks like some bizarre cinematic crossover of Puss & Boots and Clash of the Titans.
    I wish there was a greeting card to congratulate someone on her epic mythical creature acquisition; I would totally send it to you.

  123. I would like to know these three things, please:
    – What was Victor’s reaction?
    – What was Hailey’s reaction?
    – How much did it cost?

    Also, may I suggest installing a zip line in your back yard so your little friend (“Pegasus-y Lee”? “Pegasus-y Fleming”? Eh, that’s all I got) can really fly?

  124. Just finished your book, so now i’m reading your blog backwards… I mean not really backwards but I’m reading what you wrote today and going back to tomorrow and so no. Get it? I when you would. I really loved your book and relate to all of it. Had a dad and uncles a lot like you… Not like your total but close. Anyhow I’m a new fan. Thanks for the book.

  126. Please tell me that the picture of Hunter S Thomcat will be available in your store!

  128. OMG! LOVE THE PEGASUS! CAAAPSLOCK!!!

    Please do share Victor’s reaction with us. Assuming, of course, his head is still in tact and not all explody.

  131. AMAZING! LOVE IT. Where are you going to keep it? Can you just turn your house into an epic taxidermy museum? I’d really like to come see it!

  132. I’ve never seen a cat look so at home on top of a taxidermied pegasus before! I’ve never said that sentence before either. Huh. Amazeballs!

  134. Oh sweet baby beejebbus. Please, please please for all that is good and holy in this world make those things in mini’s…. My desk is the perfect place for a mini Pegasus!

  135. OMG OMG OMG! That’s just fucking awesomesauce (and clearly Hunter S agrees).

    It’s like Falcor and Artex were magically combined (since I find it unlikely that a mating between dragon and horse would work well…and I’m pretty sure The Neverending Story was WAY too pg for any sort of mating at all).

  136. I mean… I don’t even know where to start. Your particular brand of funny is so achingly funny. I don’t laugh out loud a lot (even though I type that shit CONSTANTLY. people’s feelings and all) but, girl! You have kicked it right in my wheelhouse with this post. You matter! You are so real! Thank you for putting it out there; it’s just so damn awesome.

  138. “(I’ll just apologize for that first sentence right here if this is your first time here. You should probably just come back tomorrow.)”
    That is so getting gold glittered on a t-shirt!
    Rock on!

  140. There should be a gold medal in your future for this, but I’m stumped on the category… “weird or mythical stuffed creatures”?

    I will also never get over “Knock, Knock, motherfucker” when Beyonce came to live at your house, and now – this? I must go change into a fresh Dryper now, thanks!
    😉

  142. If you don’t name him Edgarsus Winter, from this day forward we are no longer imaginary friends. The end.

  144. I wish you could vlog comments, I think I might have just prolapsed myself laughing at this. Amazing – I am off to spread this to EVERYONE IN THE WORLD.

  145. When my parents pass away, I’ll know who to sell the dead fawn that they bought some years ago curled up on a dog bed. (But first I’ll send our most skittish and easily squeaked out member of the family to the closet to “find” it and laugh first.)

  147. “Never give up and good luck will find you” – or a Pegasus. A Pegasus could find you. You are my hero, girl!

  148. Way to set expectations. What the fuck am I supposed to do when my kid wants this?!

    You kill me and make my day all at once.

  151. Oh. My. Actual. God.

    How are they going to model the clothes at the Baby Zebra Gap, now? They’ll have to paint some stripes on some dogs, because this is totally worth no mannequins at Baby Zebra Gap!

    Awesome-blossom-possum-sauce!

  153. HAAAAA. I feel like on Halloween, Victor is going to let people in your house and be like, just come in and no, we didn’t bother to decorate. I feel like my house is doesn’t have enough dead stuff kicking around.

  155. OH MY GOD!!!! I WANT ONE!!!!!!! How friggin cute is Hunter S. Cat on that dead pegasus??!! You are AWESOME!!! NEVER change!!!

  163. Of course it’s a Pegasus. I suck. I’m too literal. I thought it was a donkey. A dead angel donkey. Then I thought of Juan Valdez. So then I thought his name should be Angel Valdez, or White Mocha Coffee Bean for short. Then I read PEGASUS and immediately felt totally stupid.

  165. I am truly amazed, I never would have guessed a taxidermied Pegasus! When I scrolled down to the picture, I said out loud at my desk (thank god I’m by myself up here at work) WHAT THE FUCK.

    It is truly glorious! Love it!

  171. Holy guacamole. But the real question is…can we advertise on the internet-exploding-with-awesome Pegasus? Or rather, PegADsus?

  174. I’ve never been so excited to see what dead animal someone was getting in the mail. This was totally worth the wait.

  178. Please let me borrow for the following uses:
    1. to leave in my parents home as a welcome home after months of vacation surprise
    2. to put in my front yard and see what kinda letter I get from my HOA
    3. to leave at the front door of friends home, ring the door bell and run away. Repeatedly.
    I promise to return in good condition.

  180. Your delivery guy (around here we call him the present man) is AWESOME!! Seriously that is amazing!!

  184. IT IS GLORIOUSSSSSS!!!!!!! I cannot help but notice however, the decided LACK OF NAME. Please rectify stat.
    xx Shannnon

  187. LMAO! I actually said out loud, “Oh my god, she did not.” I don’t know what in the world gave me that reaction. After reading your blog for a while now, my first response should have been, “Holy crap, yes she did.”

  188. OMG, that is amazing!!! Don’t tell anyone but I have a live Pegasus in my backyard. It’s true I swear! 🙂

    PS They are larger!

  190. I’m so glad you explained what it is made of because I always thought pegauses would be be hard to catch and I’d hate to learn that it’s actually easy because they’re stupid. Or something.

  195. holy frijoles! That is 10 shades of awesome. Seriously. My hubby just shook his head and wandered away, but I’m still staring in awe. Congrats on your pegasus! 😀

  196. ROTFL! I love it! Mustn’t show it to my child, however, or she’ll want one, too!

  197. Pish. That’s only a BABY pegasus. I have a grown-up one, which is much bigger. It can carry a full-sized tiger — AND IT DOES. Eat your heart out, lady. (Also, I squeed at that picture with Hunter S. Thomcat, and I’m hard to make squee.)

  198. You are going to make cards with this, right? Because this must be shared w/ those poor souls who don’t have access to your awesomeness.

  202. If Victor hasn’t seen this yet, might I suggest a zipline harness and a heavy-duty clothesline attached directly over his office window. Wait until dawn, when he can only vaguely see. Nothing says “GOOD MORNING!” like an unexpected pegasus screaming towards your head at 6:30 am. Knock Knock, Motherfucker indeed.

  204. That is one proud kitty right there… on the wings of a snow white (part goose, cow, zebra) Pegasus.
    I want to come to you house and see these things for real, in all of their glory!!!

  207. Really, all it needs is a unicorn horn and we use him/her (?) as the mascot for the Double Unicorn Success Club. Rainbows for all!!

  208. I can only imagine the look of joy that crossed Victor’s face when that arrived.

    That picture with Hunter is amazing though. I think we need a poster of that.

  210. Just when I think I couldn’t love you more….THIS. You are so many kinds of awesome….SO awesome, it almost make me want to head to Texas to stalk you. But I won’t…because that would be creepy. I will just continue to think of you as my best friend…in my mind.

  211. Just too amazing for words…Oh, Victor…you may have gotten in over your head…BTW…we have named our new pony “Pony Danza.” You’re welcome. 🙂

  213. Oh. My. Maryjane. This is the BEST THING EVER!!! Just when I think you can’t surprise me anymore, this magic happens.
    So does this mean the cat’s in charge? He looks like he’s making that Pegasus his bitch.

  216. Amazing and awesome all rolled up into one. That’s waaaay better than the dead pony!

  217. At Halloween you could give her (him?) fangs and multiple fins and have a Pegasaurus.

  218. My first thought, other than it’s terrifyingly adorable – is the plural of “pegasus” indeed “pegasuses”? Going to Google right now.

  219. Awesome! ( on a side note, I always though the plural of Pegasus was Pegasi??)

  220. I wonder what other mythological creatures are out there…This could get out of hand, which would be AWESOME!

  223. Holy shitsnacks! This little post has turnd my entire day around! I can’t believe how awesome that is. I would die from happiness if I opened the door and this pegasus was there waiting for me to discover him.

  226. have you seen him at night yet? Cuz, yeah, he’s all cute in the daylight…but it’s very, very possible that he has demony-red eyes that glower brightly at you from the corner when you’re on a midnight slushie run to the fridge. Or do you have a sno-cone machine in your bedroom for real?

  235. Just when I think you couldn’t get any better, you do. I think my husband even has a little crush on you, too. He always laughs at your posts. Thanks and keep them coming!

  237. I’m super excited for you and your Pegasus, but you should know that the plural of pegasus is “pegasi.” Like platypi. Or Bloggi.

  240. Want, Want, Want…I want one, want to live at your house-you have the coolest stuff, did I mention I want one!!!! Thanks for the laughs today!

  241. I’m sorry I’m not more eloquent today, but all I’ve got is

    SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    So much win. Thanks for the smiles!! 😀

  242. I can’t wait to see what name you come up with since you have a PhD in naming shit. Peggy maybe?

  245. You need a museum. The Royal Bloggess Museum of AWESOME! for all of this stuff. The Unicorn Success Club should build it for you.

  246. OMFG THAT IS THE COOLEST THING EVER!!!!!! All caps is definitely justified in this case. A dead, stuffed pony? PFFFFT. Far too commonplace. A dead, stuffed PEGASUS pony? AW YEAH.

  247. It’s disturbing, yet I can’t look away. Hunter S. Tomcat looks so majestic! The only thing you need more is a fan so the fur will blow in the wind, that will be the final piece to the puzzle.

  248. I know this is a dated saying, but I am seriously experiencing SHOCK & AWE. You lucky, lucky, lucky funny girl! BEST.KNOCKKNOCK.EVAH.

  249. I’d like to see photos of the packaging he arrived in… how does one pack a zebra mannequin/odd-bits-o-cowandgoose for shipping? Was there a crate? Did it say Fra Gee Lay?

  252. Is it me or does anyone else my age LOVE that you equated Hunter flying the Pegasus as The Neverending Story! Maybe Clash of the Titans (ala Harry Hamlin) part 4 would work too?

  253. OMG, It’s like every childhood fantasy put together: Imagine that a horse, a unicorn, a Pegasus, the ability to fly, animals that talk, my first and current cat (both were/are orange), the Never Ending Story, and My Little Pony got merged together in a Willy Wonka Machine – you have the result. The photo has made my day! Thank you so much and tell your husband he’s so lucky (even if he doesn’t really think so right now). More photos, products and your daughter’s reaction, please!

  255. OMG, Jenny!!!

    AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!
    I. SO. WANT. ONE.

    I agree with the others … we need a name for this one …

  256. Oh. My. God!! That is so full of AWESOME it actually made me cry a little!!
    Whatcha gonna name it??

  257. Totally AWESOME! In 20 years, your house is going to be the best episode of Hoarders ever!

  258. Ohmygosh!!!! If you find a winged pig you HAVE to let me know!!! I would totally put a lien on my kidneys to buy it!!

  260. Coolest Pegasus/Zebra/Goose in the history of EVER! Does it do advertising too, or do the wings get in the way? Perhaps it needs one of those banner trailers like they use on planes for advertising car dealerships? Hunter S. Tomcat looks like he’s having the time of his motherfncking life!

  262. Dude. Seriously. You are my hero. Can I please, please, please be in your will? I understand if you don’t know me well enough (or at all, really) to bequeath me the pegasus. Although if you did, I would probably die from happiness and then whoever you really want to have it would get it right away anyway. But I would happily and gladly and joyously accept any of your other taxidermied lovelies.

    Just think about it. Ruminate. Let it marinate.

  264. I’m actually feeling a little jealous. I’m wondering how I could get one myself and exactly where it would go in the house. This is definitely the first piece of taxidermy I’ve ever truly wanted for myself. Well, my four year old daughter would love it too!

  267. No. Freaking. Way. OMG! LOVE IT!

    Also, that picture of Hunter S. Thomcat is perfection.

  273. If ONLY it was a unicorn with petrified rainbow poop included. But since it isn’t I guess a Pegasus will have to do. Congrats!

  275. Also, forgot to mention that I LOVE the reference to The Neverending Story. You rock!

  276. I don’t even know what is the matter with you? HOW could you put the awesomeness that is baby pegasus in the same category as an old dead pony. HELLO! You can see a dead pony anywhere. Pegasus, not so much.
    Really, it’s astounding.
    I’m sorry we didn’t get Victor’s views on the subject. Although, I’m sure he recognizes the absolute superiority of this purchase over the near purchase of the dead pony.

  277. Every time i watch that show “Oddities” I think of you. In an affectionate “What would the Bloggess think of that?”strangers” kind of way.

  279. Did you find him or did he find you? Also, no name yet? This is so many kinds of fantastic it hurts my head. Congratulations to your whole household!!

  280. This is SO awesome! Also, I can’t stop thinking about how pissed Victor probably is to have a Pegasus occupying his home. LOL

  281. I see that you’re using the word “ethically” rather loosely. Though I would like to see Hunter S. Thomcat soar.

  286. I am so jealous!! Screw the pony, that Pegasus is way better! It’s like your own giant My Little Pony!

    How do you find these things?!?!?!

  290. Victor is a very lucky man to have someone as wonderful as you. Just think how boring his poor life would be!

  294. I will have to go into therapy to cope with how much I like this. I mean, I’m a vegetarian, so there are issues, but: cat on a pegasus. If you need me, I’ll be in the fetal position.

  296. On a day we successfully dropped Curiosity on the surface of Mars, this indeed is the best thing in the galaxy today!

  297. Dude, seriously? Pegasus babies don’t say “Knock knock, motherfucker” because they are very eloquent creatures and they speak French. Why don’t you know this?
    My French is really rusty, so I’m going to go ask Babelfish, the online translator, what a baby pegasus would really say. Here, come with me…
    Ok, the results are in!
    Please find your translated text below:
    knock knock, motherfucker (English)
    Knock knock, motherfucker (French)

    Uh…ok. You DO have the capital K in your sentence so…I guess you were typing in French, after all. You were totally right. I’m really sorry I made a fuss. I think I should probably brush up on my French before I run around screaming, “J’accuse!”

  299. My day was really meh. Then I saw the photo of Hunter S. Thomcat riding an ethically taxidermied pegasus and my heart filled with joy. Thank you for being you and doing what you do. I second the proposed aviator cap and goggles for Mr. Thomcat.

    By the way, I keep seeing him as sitting up there with a confident stare and his arms folded for some reason. Maybe just something about the pattern of his fur in that photo. Anyway, to me he looks all. “Yeah, I am riding a pegasus. I know how completely splendid I look. I don’t need you to tell me, but thanks anyway.”

  303. FUCKING ROCK ON!! THAT SHIT IS PURE AWESOME!! i bet if you check it’s rectum there’s probably left over skittles because unicorns and pegasus fart rainbows. it give a whole new meaning to the phrase “taste the rainbow”. you should totally turn it’s butt hole into a skittles pez dispenser. you’re welcome in advance for the kick ass idea jenny!

  306. LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!! I’m so envious of your collection of dead animals. And I love your husband for dealing with it! LOL!

  307. Seriously the most awesome piece of taxidermy the world has ever seen. My 12-yr old mythology-crazed son would positively go ape-shit over that. He claims he’d rather have an ammit, but I know if he saw your little pegasus he’d change his mind.

    Knock, knock, mutherfucker is right!

  309. That picture with Hunter S. Thomcat couldn’t be better. This is too awesome for words.

  312. That is the most awesome thing ever. I think he obviously looks like a Hermes.

  313. Jenny, I can’t say this enough – You are my motherfucking hero. Never stop being you.

    P.S. The only reason I didn’t all caps that is because when I am in awe of someone’s, um, awesomeness, I fall into quiet reverence, so as to give them the respect they motherfucking deserve.

  315. Does your UPS guy hate you? I can see you ripping packages open before he gets to the truck and just the look of terror when he sees these things… that’d be funny as hell. 😛

  316. That is amazing.

    and thank you, I keep telling my husband that I could be weirder, but I’m not sure he believed me until I showed him Beyonce.

  325. Jenny, Jenny, Jenny… I have run out of words. If you start a religion, I will join. How is Victor taking this? Thank you for my delight of the day!

  326. BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! That thing is AWESOME! Oh, and, wouldn’t it be Pegasi? 😉

  327. Awesome. The picture of Hunter S. on the Pegasus is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. You are hilarious and you make me want to buy taxidermy animals and fill my home with them.

  332. This is the best dead thing I’ve ever seen in my life. I want one. What is its name? Hunter S Thomcat looks PLEASED.

  333. And now it seems a good idea to do that parody of the TriStar Pictures brand opener at the beginning of films. It just seems funny to me!

  334. I want that. I really, really want that thing. I want a Pegasus. I would put him in my office and love him forever. At least until my dog chewed him up and wept bitter tears about it.

  336. I am only slightly upset you didn’t post Victor’s reaction to this beautiful creature!!!

  337. I’m so happy for you. Also, you give me faith in the human race as a whole. That I can open my reader and see this makes my day! Month even!

    FYI, The Never Ending Story was my most favoritest movie as a child. For reals.

  339. Next up you should get a taxidermied unicorn, and they could be friends. Oh that’s an awesome name for a band, The Taxidermied Unicorns!! Maybe all your animals could form a band and tour?? If Gorillaz can be a band of cartoon creations, surely Taxidermied animals can express themselves through music?? Enquiring minds want to know 🙂

  341. Wait.. shouldn’t that be “pegasi?” I need a thesaurus. And now find the similarity between “thesaurus” and “pegasus” somewhat eerie.

    I think I need to up my dosage.

  345. Best thing EVER. I squealed in delight and scared my newborn sleeping in my arms. TOTALLY WORTH IT.

  346. I think this may be one of the most awesome thing I’ve ever seen on the internet. Ever.

    I was going to write more, but then I realized there are no other words.

  351. I don’t know quite what to say… Except, YOU EFFING ROCK! I can’t wait for your book signing! I guilted my dad into taking me, it’s going to kick ass! Thanks for brightening up another day!!!!

  352. OMG, I didn’t think you could out do the pony, but this is unfuckingbelievable!!! it is pure awesomeness!!! Congrats!!! I hope you plan on making xmas card pics of it. I’m so excited for you.

  354. I concur, a pegasus is many times better than a pony. Though, I would have been happy with either when I was a little girl. Or basically anything somewhat horse-shaped. Hunter is living out my childhood and my childhood is just a bit jealous. (Okay, yes, I took riding lessons, but that’s not the same thing as having your own horse. Not remotely the same.)

  358. you should charge admission to your house…it would be AWESOME!!! Love you! good luck on your tour!!!

  360. TOTALLY WORTH THE FLOOR SPACE!! I’ll admit, I was a little on Victor’s side on the stuffed antique pony, but THIS IS A COMPLETE WIN! He’s magical.

  361. Every time I think I could not POSSIBLY adore you any more, you pull something like this off and I am filled with awe yet again.

    Don’t ever change, Jenny. Seriously, I’ve been having some down days lately and then I click over here and see this? So very, very awesome!

  362. I bet Victor was so happy for you that he passed out from sheer excitement…..

  365. So freaking cool! That is way better than the original pony. Just goes to show that everything happens for a reason!!!

  366. LOVE IT! I think its Hunter S Tomcats TARDIS machaine. I think he’s the new Time Lord….just sayin…

  367. Have always been freaked out by taxidermied animals. But have found a new love for them since following your blog. This crazy 38 year old and finally found someone with the same sense of humer as me. I big metal chicken story I almost peed my pants from laughing so hard. I am always looking forward to your posts. And I need to get one of those refridgerator magnets. I four kids, 17, 11, 11 ,10 and they eat nonstop. I hoping something like that would slow them down.

    Thanks for always making my day!!

    Jennifer

  368. Someday, far, far in the future of course, the execution of your will is going to be all at once awesome and awkward.

  373. One of my cats has been begging for wings forever, in order to catch flying prey – I can’t let her see this or I’ll never hear the end of it…

  374. This is the most amazing thing… EVER. I really want to know Victor’s reaction to this arrival.

  375. Oh. Em. Gee!
    Squeeee!
    That is so perfect! LOVE the picture with Hunter. Do you have a name for Peggy yet?

  377. My heart stopped for a moment when i saw the first picture. It looked like there was a live baby Pegasus at your door!

    Envious sigh.

  380. I’m so insanely JEALOUS!! That is a thing of beauty! That is definitely something my house is missing…ethically taxidermied imaginary creatures!

  381. Ah, the lucky Hunter. That photo is like those pics of kids breastfeeding that I always want to caption “Enjoy, Kiddo, It’s All Downhill From Here.”

    So… what’d Victor say?

  383. I’m pretty sure you should hang your dead pegasus like a chandelier from the ceiling, but low enough so that you can give it a good swing as you walk by to go out the door.

    It could also double as a sort of eccentric trapeze situation, where you get a good running start and grab the hind legs and swing wildly and imagine holding onto a real Pegasus, wind rushing through your hair, like that one in Clash of the Titans (the original, with the animatronic Bobo).

  385. I pretty damn jealous.
    But, you know…the good kind.
    Like, if I can’t be the proud owner of a stuffed fucking Pegasus than YOU are truly the only other person who should have it…except maybe my sister…she could use a Pegasus.

  391. Thank you for your blog. And thank you for not being my next door neighbor.

  392. OH. MY. GOD.

    I was really excited to come see you on tour next week, but now all I want to do is meet Pegasus. I mean, you’re great and all, but PEGASUS!!!!! Will you please bring him (her?) on tour with you? Pleeeeease?????

    See you in Portland! (Actually, see you in Beaverton. 🙂 )

  393. You win the internet! This is WAY better than the pony.

    Will there now be a Pegasus Success Club? (Man, that’s hard to type, much less say) Or maybe a Pegasus Awesomeness Club?

  395. No time to read all the other comments now, but I loved The Never Ending Story…but no one after my generation seems to. Oh, and I was totally talking you and your book and your blog and your awesomeness up today to my sister-in-law. Thank you for being you.

  396. OMG, this is 1000% mother fucking awesome…Where do you find these wonderful creatures.

    What is his name????

  397. I love this so much, when I saw the picture I screamed . Thank you. My wish list just got longer.

  400. …I just want a photo of VICTOR’S FACE. ‘Cause if it were my Mr. Bill – he’d look just like he ate a lemon – even as i would be screaming around for joy….

  405. As long as I’ve been reading you, at least weekly, you still manage to make my mouth drop. SOMFB that’s a damn Pegasus you’re cat’s sitting on.

  410. Oh if only he had a horn he could be the life-sized mascot for the Unicorn Success Club! Because a Unicorn that can grow wings has to be the epitome of success, right?

  411. Oh. My. God. This is the best fucking thing I have seen this week (I know it’s only Monday, but nothing will beat it, so it counts). WINGS! It has wings! I want it!

  414. A motherfucking pegasus! You’ve outdone yourself, now please tell me you have a picture of Victor ‘s reaction when he first saw it.

  417. Conjoined twin Blythe dolls and Pegasus at the front door.
    Two whole chapters in Hailey’s future memoir. Done and done. Her future literary success is assured – the book is basically writing itself.

  418. I was wondering how you were going beat that dead horse and you win the Pegasus is way more amazing than any normal ethically stuffed horse could ever be!

  423. This is the first time I have been legitimately jealous of one of your dead animal purchases–the awesomeness of that pegasus cannot be denied!

    I’m also impressed with you for keeping it secret until now–I would be telling EVERYBODY.

  425. OK, all of the others skeeved me out but I can honestly say that I want it.

    I have the perfect place for it. Near my front door so when you open it you are all WHAT THE EVER LOVING WHAT NOW? And the Pegasus is all ‘Knock Knock Motherfucker…’

  426. OMG! OMG! OMG! That is amazing! I mean, I could never have one, because it would freak me out, but it’s so cool that you have one! Amazing!

  427. I am humming The Neverending Story song in my head as I type this….oh yes I am. You have to come up with the ultimate name for this majestically weird creature.

    And the pic w/ Hunter is completely awesomesauce…no, lawsomesauce!

  429. Up until now, I’ve been very happy to enjoy your ethically taxidermied (sp?) inhabitants through your blog. Things have changed. I want your Pegasus in my house right now! Any thoughts on flying her to San Diego? Even for a brief visit? I’m not telling my husband about this. Or anyone else.

  431. Unrelated to dead zebra covered in feathers spiriting Thom to parts yet undiscovered ~
    Once again I owe you a debt of thankatude. Today was a “I need a RED DRESS” kinda day ~ but that was not happening. Instead I was trying to hunt up some of those stupid velcro thingers that you tie back tomatoes with. August in New England, tons of halloween, no tomatoe thingers. I was getting annoyed at life and could not think of a single thing to use instead …….THEN ….. This lady with long brown hair walks by me wearing some sort of nubby brownish thing. She reminded me of the Snuffleupagus that was really a donkey (not judging, just saying what she reminded me of). That made me think of you ….and ….. TWINE! (and the fact that I can be such a dumbsnuffleupagus for not thinking twine in the first place …. sigh ..) I also got to smile in the jokes on me kinda way that I read this blog and could have that type of thought association to begin with … so .. THANKS!!

  432. Please let me know if either of your next door neighbors ever want to sell their homes. I will be moving in.

  433. I say you name him Dr. Whooves! 🙂 Afterall, he is like HST personal Tardis!!

  434. How? How do you know Will Wheaton, Nathan Fillion AND own a pegasus? Who’s soul did you sell to get those? Really, really jealous of your epic-ness.

  435. Wow. I think I really need to know the following:
    What did Victor say/do and was he in on it?
    Did HST climb up there himself or did you have to put him there for that photo?

    That is all. I am still getting over the fact that somebody out there took the time to make this.

  437. I was feeling pretty shitty because of all sorts of reasons and then I read this and now I’m laughing. Thanks Jenny 🙂

  438. WOW, that is the best thing in the history of FOREVER.

    So, do we get to know Victor’s reaction to this one? Or did he just sigh and go into his office?

    (This one doesn’t seem as much a “knock knock motherfucker” as Beyonce — this little fellow looks more like he’s saying “are you my mommy?”)

  439. LOVE!!!!!! What’s her name? I say her because I don’t see anything dangling (yeah, I looked!). That cat of yours is kinds of awesome for appreciating this new member of the household. Victor’s thoughts……?

  440. This is so many kinds of awesome I don’t even know where to start! Totally jealous, but thoroughly happy for you!!!! (And Hunter S. Thomcat is the best!)

  441. I have been following you for a while and really enjoy your blog. Had to comment on your newest additions as I love the Pegasus and Hunter for loving the Pegasus!

  442. Possibly the only thing better than the rent-a-sloth. and freakin CUTE!!! (cuz frankly, that was one effed up looking pony….) 🙂

    Christa

  443. How much would I have to give you for charity for you to send me the contact information for where you got this so that I can get this for my sister for Christmas? I don’t want to be greedy, so I would totally make you an amazing offer, but honestly, my sister HAS to have this. Like, I am pretty sure if I was able to get her this then all her dreams would finally come true, because HELLO, it is a damn Pegasus. So, you know, no pressure or anything, but let me know….

  444. I totally laughed out loud when I saw the picture of the Pegasus at your front door. This is so much better than the pony that it’s freakin’ ridiculous!

    Does he have a name? I vote for Harold.

  446. I am titally and totally in tears here! What a fantastic find. I am truly agog of your abilities to unearth pegasuses like that. That is the most precious thing evar! and I mean evar!

  448. I wept in sorrow when you got outbid on the pony. These tears are tears of joy and laughter at your wonderful alternative.

  450. There is only one thing to say to this: SQQUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  451. Have you thought the effect that carrying all these parcels is having on your mailman’s psyche? Although to counterbalance the inevitable descent into madness, there’s no risk of him delivering a taxidermied Pegasus to the wrong house – and customer satisfaction is just one of those things you can’t buy.

  453. Never Ending Story part 12 sounds about right. It is Never Ending, right?? LOVE the Pegasus!!! That is awesome wrapped up in fabulous and tied up with a big bow of fantastic!! 😀

  456. Well now you see, this is exactly the type of taxidermy I need. Because there would be nothing strange about stringing this from the ceiling in imitation of flight, thus avoiding the cats eating it situation. Plus, it’s awesome.

  459. Dear Jenny, you need to get some rest not go on 2 week tour. Probably will get deleted.

  463. OH MY GOSH I CANT STOP LOOKING AT THAT PICTURE. I’m obsessed with your cat. And your Pegasus.

  464. I tried convincing my husband that I need one. He called it an abomination.

  465. Wait, the knock knock line is for the 5 foot chicken. It’s on my calendar – OK your calendar.

  466. Can we rename it the Double Pegasuccess Club?

    I said this to my husband, and he said, “Why would you want to be a member of the Double Pegasus Sex Club? That’s just weird!” So you have to enunciate properly, or people may think you’re a perv.

    You leave me in the odd position of hoping you don’t get things you want in the first place, so that you continue to come up with the awesome-blotto things you get to replace them! This way you only get every other amazing thing, but all the things you get are twice as amazing as the first things, at least, so it counts as more than half the awesome. But don’t tell Victor, let him think you are getting only half the things you want, so you get credit for compromising. To recap: you get credit for only getting half the things you want, but they are twice as good as the half you didn’t get. This is the new math. Try to keep up.

  469. Holy crap! This is probably the coolest thing I have ever seen! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!!

  470. Amazing. Is there somewhere on your site with photographs of all of your taxidermied menagerie all in one place? If there isn’t there definitely should be.

  474. I just wish I was there to witness Victor’s reaction to the delivery!

    P.S. HST needs a cape to wear while flying Pega-pony. I’m thinking red or purple.

  475. I can’t… believe… there are people who make that shit. AND people who buy that shit.

    And that I’m strangely impressed and fascinated by that shit, and kind of want to give that shit a hug.

    Everything’s all topsy-turvy now.

  476. You live the most wonderful life. And I’m so glad you share it with us.

  477. I totally asked my husband to email you and ask you to send me this because I have leukemia.

    He refused. Mostly I think because he doesn’t want me to be happy, and maybe partially because I don’t have leukemia…yet. Pretty sure dead pegasus ponies ward off all types of cancer.

  479. That is too cool for words, or at least any words that _I_ can come up with. I think that 2nd picture needs to replace all those “Hang In There, Baby!” kitten posters.

  480. This just happened and he had to deal with it.

    Me: “Yesterday was my birthday!!”
    Hubby (T-rex) : “Yes, I know it was your birthday, we had dinner and I cake and stuff”
    Me: “You. are. a. dick!”
    T-rex :”I thought yesterday was a great birthday! You even said it was, why am I a dick?!?”
    Me: “Oh like you don’t know . . .why don’t guys ever get it?!”
    T-rex : just a wtf look
    Me: “You didn’t get my a flying horse!!!”
    T-rex: “WHAT?!”
    Me: “Yeah! Jenny got a flying horse, you dont love me or something!”
    T-rex :Walked away.

    And I still dont have a flying horse. . . Thanks Bloggess. . .now I see how bad things really are. ..

    LOL OKay so I now think I want one . .but dead things freak me out. . .almost as much as horses. . .

  481. Oh. My. Lanta.

    I am in awe.
    Of you.
    Of the person who made this.
    Of Hunter.

    Minus the dead part, this was the source of all of my dreams in my purple-rainbow-unicorn phase of youth. And here it is… come to fruition before my eyes just before I hit the big 4-0 next month…

    Never give up on your dreams is right!

  484. I am concerned! I stumbled upon here and have obsessed in starting from the beginning and reading everything from the start so I can understand the innermost workings of your mind Jen Lawson – I don’t know why its important to me and I am scared…. someone, anyone.. help… me…

  486. This is the most adorably creepy picture ever.

    Can I post this to Tumblr? I’ll set a click-through link.

  488. I have been in an extraordinarily dark place the last few days. But I do believe that your one-horned beast and your tiny kitty just made my life a whole lot brighter. Thank you <3

  491. The picture with Hunter is adorable! I can almost pretend that the pegasus is real (plus, it’s like a dead baby pegasus you’ve got there)

  494. Shit, now my two cats are insanely jealous and want their own Pegasus. I’ll never hear the end of it.

  496. Oh my GOD.

    This is seriously the best anything that has ever existed, in the history of all things, on this or any other plane of existence.

    It is probably absolutely fascinating to walk through your house. (And yard; can’t forget about poor Beyoncé.)

  497. Just out of curiosity, how often do delivery people end up screaming and running for their lives from your home? Really cute picture of Hunter S., though!

  498. OMG, I have to have one. I don’t know how my husband would react but I assume it would be much like Victor’s reaction!

  501. LOVE the Pegasus.

    Best (and most ironic) discovery EVER. My workplace firewall blocks anything and everything that can be construed as even mildly fun, entertaining, or hobby-ish (with the interesting exception of CBS Sports during fantasy football season – in which our IT guys participate). So my firewall protects me from the shadiest of sites….like any of our local news stations (someone please tell me the weather!), the entertainment and relationship sections of MSN, recipe sites, and (ok this seems reasonable for work) anything with “adult content.” HOWEVER…..I just realized I can get to The Bloggess. Victory is mine at last. 🙂

  502. I love the Pegasus! That is the ultimate in awesomeness. Now, what kind of advertising can you come up with for this fellow?

  503. Have you decided on a name yet? If not, may I suggest the following:

    1) Winglebert Humperdink
    2) Oprah Wingfrey
    3) Monica Flewinsky

    Also? The fact that Victor hasn’t smothered you in your sleep yet is a Christmas miracle.

  506. THIS. IS. EPIC. (all caps, just for you). EPIC! It makes me want to search for a Pegasus for me. WOW. I mean wow! That is the most fantastic thing I have ever seen.

  507. That is amazing. I want one of my own, a life sized My Little Pony. Is there a picture of ice cream cones or rainbows or hearts and flowers on the rump? (and as always, I love you Hunter S. Thomcat)

    great idea: your NEXT book tour should be Jenny the Bloggess and Her Traveling Menagerie!

  509. You. Are. Awesome.
    PS. I really love the Never Ending Story caption. You know the way to this girl’s heart, through cinematic classics.

  510. Slowly, but surely, this world is starting to make sense and this picture is one of the missing puzzle pieces. SO AMAZING!

  512. I think that is the cutest thing you’ve ever gotten. =) I have dreamed of pegasus horses being real since I was a little girl. Thanx for sharing, made my day!

  513. That might be the greatest thing I have ever seen. I don’t have your love of dead things, but I might have to get me one of those…That way if anyone ever gives you sh*t, you can calmly respond “F**k You, I have a Pegasus! I am totally storybook!”

  515. Ok, so, long ago I found this weird tiny zebra/horse/giraffe thing that is not taxidermy but some sort of leather craft. It has this crazy wonky eye and this weird afro hair. Long story short, when I saw it, I thought of you. My husband (who sometimes sounds like yours) would not let me buy it unless I promised that I was sending it to you, not keeping it on the bookshelf where it has sat ever since. I was going to give it to you at the book signing in Atlanta but I couldn’t find parking!!

    ANYWAY. Now that you have a dead pony I really feel like you need to see this weird gift if person. You may not want to keep it, and that is fine. But it might make a great cat toy? Problem is – I have no idea how to send you things…And I’d rather not come off as a stalker so just let me know if you have a fan mail PO box or something and I’ll ship it off!

  516. My 5yo daughter would kill her best friend for that pegasus pony!

    Hmm, I might too. That thing sure is purty and magical looking. Congrats on your latest acquisition.

  521. OMG, please, PLEASE let me borrow this for my housewarming party!

    I was thinking of a pirate motif, but now, that has completely flown the coop. I need one of these. Stat.

    Also, your book is amazing. I wish you were doing some East Coast signings, because I would bring my iPhone and let you sign my phone. Since its on my iBooks/Kindle.

    Yup.