Yesterday I wrote about how 2017 is going to be The Year of the Pillow Fort and you were all in so we’re gonna need a bigger fort, or probably just good internet connectivity since most of us are too introverted to leave our own homes. And in the spirit of encouraging ridiculous laughter about very stupid things no one else gets, I’d like to nominate this as our song of the year.
Turn down your speakers if you work in an office. Or turn them way up because it might mask the sound of you laughing hysterically. It might just be me.
PS. Victor says it probably is just me, and he’d appreciate it if I stopped blasting this song and doing the robot in his office while he’s on conference calls but I believe in sharing the magic. Also, I’m not doing the robot. I’m doing The Cabbage Patch. Just, really, really badly.
149 thoughts on “And you can tell everybody that is your song…”
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You’ve really got to appreciate the honesty in their description.
1- This is why I have headphones at my desk
2- I need to send this to my husband, I think he’d really, really like it.
This is for Victor — Victor, we totally appreciate your hanging in here with Jenny. We kind of collectively pick on you, in your role as a foil to craziness, but really, you rock! Thank you!
BWAHAHAHA. I love Britney. And this song reminds me of when I was 23 and duuuuuumb. Perfectly fitting.
Poor Victor. Tell him to get with the program 😃😃
That’s painful. But you’re thinking and I like that. 😘
This song may be just the inspiration I need to get a new job! Kidding to my boss who also follows you. Really. Just kidding.
Perhaps you can arrange Victor’s next conference call so they’re playing the song on the other end too.
What I love most is the beat you can dance to…even if I can’t dance.
That pause right around the 2 minute mark. Just when you think it’s done, and starts back up again. Genius. Crying from laughter.
I have to ask… how do your animals feel about this fantastic cacophony of madness? 🙂
Sounds more luke a squeaky toy than a flute…i am doing the running man
I love you, I love Britney and I love this Toxic arrangement. Nomination approved!
OMG. This will haunt me in my dreams tonight. Thank you for that.
Thanks a lot for the laughs as always. Much love.
Reminds me a little of a classic by Pat Metheny, Forward March:
Classic broken song that you can’t help but love.
This reminds me of when I was a kid and my mom bought me a recorder at a fair… biggest mistake she ever made.
No. Just. No. Thank you. No.
That song is…strangely compelling.
NOT THE RECORDER! PLEASE!! Memories of my daughter’s 4th grade music class concert! Flashbacks, twitching, ear drums wincing!!! Grabbing support animals NOW! 😵
HA! Victor clearly does not appreciate the essence of the flute! I mean, they were shredding those things. Pfff
This is perfect.
Seriously (almost as bad as starting a sentence with honestly or literally), your daily blog is an inspiration. Yesterday, I didn’t get out of my pillow fort enough to write.
Great. Now that we’ve lined up a distinctive and inspiring anthem, who’s gonna perform it during Super Bowl Half-Time show? We’re all obviously otherwise tied up with the new construction (Since the world really needs some balance, maybe “Bloggess Towers”? Something in multicolored cotton, pet hair, and smelling like bed-head). Maybe someone could reach out to Mariah Carey? For some reason, I feel like this might be in her wheel house…
I think I just heard that tune at my sons school during the winter program.
WE NEED A LYRICS CONTEST
“I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talking about” -Moonlight Kingdom.
I say that to my husband every time he won’t get with the program.
It may be called shittyfluted, but to me, it sounds a lot more like shittykazooed. I wonder though if the London Philharmonic has a copyright on their version of shittykazooed?
This is awesome. [Disclaimer: I have no idea what it’s SUPPOSED to sound like, which probably detracts from some of its awesomeness.]
something like… kill my squeaky toy yeah kill my squeaky toy
This is EXCELLENT.
This reminds me of my recorder playing days. I think this mirrors how my version of “Mary Had a Little Lamb” went down. I can’t see past my tears…I’m laughing so hard.
OMG, it’s every elementary school band concert I’ve ever been to.
I think this is an excellent theme song, but for the protection of all ears I suggest we only play it on the high holidays.
Also, if you dance while pretending you’re C3PO, every dance is the robot.
It must be a recorder. I know that awful sound anywhere.
Maybe she just saw “Florence Foster Jenkins” and thinks she can get even more famous by sucking.
This is hilarious.It sounds like drunken kazoo players got together to each play a different song simultaneously.
On the days when I need something more subdued I will go with this diddy by Macklemore: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9c6p2lLJwHw
Thanks for the giggles
That is almost as good as this…
Which would also be an amazing “remix” theme song!
I love how totally warped your brain is!
This is totally the best and the worst thing I have ever heard….combined! I love it. Theme song approved!
My daughter starts recorder soon (Why, fourth grade music teacher, why?) so I imagine my house will be sounding a lot like this. Shittyfluted.
I’m ready. I’ll bring my own instrument for the theme song!
Earbuds at work be praised. My co-workers already wonder why I laugh randomly in an office that is library quiet….. kinda eerie here to be honest……. just silence, typing, and my random giggling….. thank you.
I think the cabbage patch should be our official dance. Or the sprinkler.
Oh my fucking whatever!! Jenny, I so get you right now!! Course I did just find some pot in an old purse, but thank you for the laugh. Ya know, my boyfriend has tried to get me to believe that his “what I know as a hicky–that I didn’t make” is actually a bruise” lol
I can’t wait to get home and listen to this song.
I’m not a good cabbage patcher. Or roboter. Or sprinkler. My song of the year is this one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxWxXncl53U This kid is my Patronus. She is filled to the brim with no-care.
I remember learning the recorder in Grade 5–that’s what our class sounded like. Then I took up the bagpipes in high school for a short time, and I sounded like that screaming goat…
My dog did not appreciate it, but, she’s not really been paying attention to current events. I choose to shield her from that part of life.
My dog did not even react. I’m thinking I’ve desensitized her with my shower singing:). Thanks for the laugh, Jenny!
Ah yes, Pillow Forts and Toxic, will there be an official drink as well? I am down if there is a drink, tomorrow is my Friday!
Thank you! I smiled so hard it hurt my big round face!
You’ve set the bar at a perfect height for 2017. Thank you.
That was hilarious and something I desperately needed today.
Needs more cowbell.
Needs more cowbell. And clog dancing..clog dancing would work well.
Not just you….HILARIOUS!
I’m having flashbacks of elementary school band concerts.
I think a piece of my soul just died. 😉
ohmyfuck, i just hit my head when i doubled over laughing. hilarious!
and now i pray:
dear lord, thank you for the internet. and the bloggess! xo
I had to unplug my headphones so my daughter could hear what I was laughing at, I was laughing too hard to explain.
Maybe they can play at the inauguration…nah, they are too good for that. 😉
Ack! Comma splice! That was supposed to be a period!
My cats just ran from my bed when the video started and are now giving me hurt and angry looks but I’m laughing too hard to soothe them! 😂😂
It just gets better and better the longer it plays!
This is the kickstart my 2017 was needing. I couldn’t stop laughing!!
That’s so bad it’s …. bad.
I was thinking more along the lines of the Tom Lehrer songbook for my theme song. This one sounds too much like someone is DEcomposing!
Do not drink coffee while listening to this!
I pulled a muscle in my back and it hurts to laugh, but omg!!! Reminds me of my own shittyflute experiences in public school – did everyone have to learn that?
This is perfect! Hard to feel down when you listen to that! Plus… Shittyflute has done a ton of other songs! I think it’s my favourite YouTube channel!
Now where did I put my elementary school recorder? Do you think a tin whistle would work?
I need this as a ringtone and an alarm and a doorbell, car horn… Laughed so hard I’m queasy.
That is either the worst song I have ever heard OR a brilliant satire. Either way, my esteem for Britney Spears has jumped fairly high into positive territory. And the song does seem like it will fit perfectly with what anybody but the alt-right thinks will happen after Jan. 20. Another spot-on post by the greatest Jenny of all.
I might have to sneak off to the employee bathroom to listen to this and dance. I need something to get me through.
Oh my farting goat god! Not only was I laughing so hard big fat tears were rolling down my face (which was JUST what I needed since I just got back in from a run and it’s cold and oogie out there and all that rushing wind hurt my ears. Ow) but both of my cats came over to investigate the strange noises coming out of my Chromebook and Bella (my female) gave me that look like “MAWM! What the shit? Seriously, mawm? WHAT. THE.SHIT?”
Okay, I played this and it totally freaked my dog out.
I didn’t realize if you clicked on one video and then the other (in this instance shittyflute and the pat Metheny vid) it would play them both at the same time. Took me a moment to realize I was listening to both mixed together. Uh, it certainly improved one of the tunes at least. : )
Omg I needed that
So So Funny, but also painful (in that it reminds ALL of us of elementary school); I was grateful that when I clicked on the comments, it ceased playing (which means I have to go back to listen to the whole thing, because apparently, I missed some good shit).
I DO also love the screaming goats compilation. THAT was a hoot… or a howl… or, well, something else.
So Pillowforts and Toxic and Wine Slushies, OH MYYYYY!
Now I can’t get it out of my head!! I vote YES Love you Jenny!
I read the title and thought you were going to tell me Elton John died. Not that I’m disappointed that he’s not dead (because I’m not a horrible person and Crocodile Rock isn’t bad enough to warrant a death sentence) but I was all braced and now my ambivalance has nowhere to go.
OMG, Yes, absolutely the perfect music for this administration! I listened to the whole thing and laughed all through it, because by an amazing coincidence just this morning I bought a recorder and a little how-to book because they say old people need to learn a musical instrument or their mind matter will shrink, so now I know what to expect from myself.
OMG … it just goes on and on and on and on. It’s the John Jacob Jingleheizer of shittyflutes.
This is the greatest, and I’m pretty sure I can reach this level of musical talent 😂😂😂
My husband says that is wrong and bad, while tapping his feet
To the music!
Maybe they could just play this at the innoguration?
OMG, this is hysterical. Thanks for the laugh Jenny.
Toxic?? You can’t beat Bohemian Rhapsody for shittyfluting.
How is god’s white and snowy earth did you find this mess? It reminds me of a Hindu temple that I went to where they have this piece of electric equipment that blast this thing throughout the temple complex. It’s going to stick with me until I listen to Cat Dreams on Spotify (yes, that’s a real playlist!).
I had to actually stop it because the cats were going bonkers. LOL. That cracked me right up. XD Thanks for that laugh, Jenny. Damn, that was hilarious.
I prefer this version to the original.
It is sort of like listening to a 4th grade band concert. But not as good.
My cats unanimously decided that this song CANNOT be played in our home. Although it seems to be fairly representative of the 2017 shit show.
This type of music is why I decided to be a music therapist and NOT a music educator! Can you imagine a classroom full of off-key 9 year olds playing things like this? I can. I lived it for a short time before dropping Music Ed as part of dual major! Now I can enjoy things like this instead of living it!
When I first read about this, I wasn’t wearing my glasses, and thought 2017 would be “The Year of the Blanket Fart”. I’m so glad I was wrong!
OMG! That was horrible! And….it made me think of Florence Foster Jenkins which is a wonderful/terrible movie that made me cry. Go watch it. Now. Here’s the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HszfdNS0JSc
Reminds me of one of my favorites – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=liD59IL7O6Y
I don’t even remember what my life was like before I heard shittyfluted pop songs.
Mainly because of the shittyringing in my ears causing remarkable brain fog.
My cat ran over to see if she could smother the noise with her body. It didn’t work……..I’m still dancing!
Ahaha This is totally our song of the year!
My cat did not like that.
That was AMAZING!
I have the volume off cause I’m in a coffee shop and they have their own music going, but I’m still laughing at your post. I’m guessing it’s funnier than the video, but I guess I could give Brittany a chance.
I did not think I was going to laugh…and then I did. I may have snort-laughed. Did not expect to be so entertained.
Crying. I thought the 20th Century Fox theme shittyfluted was the funniest thing I’d ever heard. Our new theme song is the closest of possible seconds, maybe even a tie. But if we need a great big show opener. . .
This is my first exposure to shittyflute and I swear I almost had an aneurysm I was laughing so hard! There are not enough thank you’s in the world for me to adequately express my gratitude. You are my queen!
Rumor is Trump has slated this as the theme song for his celebratory one-man show on 01/20/2017. Many performers including Ted Nugent and one of the college marching bands will cover this with choreography by “Liltle Hands Kanye West” and “William Louis Smooth-Moving Rudy Giuliani.”
Yesterday your post made me cry, because I just ended a relationship the day before Christmas so everything makes me cry, and I so needed your pillow fort and animals. Today, though, I laughed my ass off, first with the shittyfluting, then with everyone else’s contributions (I still can’t stop giggling at those screaming goats). I love reading your blog, and being able to read all the comments without worrying about reading any negative shit just adds to the pleasure. Thanks for the safe place, Jenny.
Hahahahaha… it’s not just you.
Yes!!!! So much awesome right there. dancing
The dog was NOT PLEASED with this
Is it okay that my 17 year old son liked this as much as I did? I haven’t laughed so long since seeing Stephen Wright live in the 80’s man. This is an awesome fort!!
That song is pure gold!! But how is that not scaring your cats? Mine is now nowhere to be seen, lol.
This really is hilarious. Victor is the weird one. 🙂
Ola, bom dia, desejo não receber mais os e-mails, obrigado, tenha um ótimo ano.
I don’t normally commment.. but was listening to this at the breakfast table and my own year old daughter said “what is that Horrible noise?” And did not understand when I broke out in hysterical laughter. Thank you for getting my days off to an awesome start!
You know what makes me really upset? It took quite a while but I just finished reading your entire archives. Having first read the books. Twice each. What am I going to do with my life now?
(You’re the best person ever. Please don’t change. Except the depression bits. Fuck those.)
Seriously Victor…how in the world can you mistake the Cabbage Patch for the Robot? Clearly you need a lesson in 80’s dancing.
And, for what it’s worth, I teach the Cabbage Patch to my daughter and her friends, who roll their eyes every time. I say…you can never know too much shit.
That was fun. Just before I read this post I was driving my long commute, and I finished listening to Neil Young, who was kind of bringing me down, so I put on Angelique Kidjo, one of the most high energy performers I’ve ever seen, and immediately I had a smile on my face.
Hilarious! Thank goodness I keep earphones in my office desk. It takes confidence to play that badly. As my oldest daughter says about her childhood (she is now 30), “You can make anything a projectile if you just have confidence in yourself.” Obviously we were not helicopter parents.
You are my hero.
oops! You are my hero for the Vampire Brotherhood post. This one’s good, but that’s what I meant to comment on.
Haven’t I suffered enough? My son is learning to play clarinet.
OMG! Bohemian Rhapsody…
Wow. Ok. I shared with friends and coworkers. And I laughed throughout the entire video. As a former clarinet player, this is how everything sounds. Awesome!
this is just the worst/best.
I will retreat to my current earworm, Ida Maria’s “I like you so much better when you’re naked (I like me so much better when you’re naked).” With her “Cherry Red” for a palate cleaner.
I really need to not be drinking coffee when I click play on these videos! I laughed so hard I cried. Then went on a ShittyFlute bender.
OMG. It hurts so much. The laughing muscles are breaking.
Not just you. (Exits to change pants).
hahaha….. I am at work, but have headphones. So, now I am laughing out loud hysterically, and my coworkers have no idea why. Although, come to think of it, this isn’t that much different than any other day…
Reminds me of the comedian Les Dawson’s piano playing… he worked really hard to get it that bad.
This is so freaking awesome
Ok, this upset my cats hugely. They’re all looking at me with big round WTAF eyes
This video is how I die.
I have an ear infection, so I could only listen for about 30 seconds before the pain became unendurable. LOL
OMFG. It’s January 20th. THAT DAY. And I’m not in the greatest mood and I realized I was behind on reading your blog and knew that would cheer me up. This shittyflute video has just turned my whole day around. So ridiculous! I’m laughing so hard!
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