Don’t be a hater, dear.

I’m a big fan of Halloween so this year I’ve decided to dress up as one of my favorite characters ever.

Victor and Hailey had just watched the show the character was from so it was fresh in their minds when I put everything together and walked out to surprise them:

me: “Are you terrified? You should be. At any rate, I’m not going to kill you. Well, maybe after dessert. I put a lot of effort into the key lime pie.”

Victor: Huh.

me:  Pretty good impersonation, right?

Hailey:  I don’t get it.  Who are you supposed to be?

me:  Really?  Hang on. “I used to be an outcast, a freak. I go proudly to the flame. Go ahead, BURN ME.”

Hailey: ?

me:  REALLY?  Your daughter doesn’t know who I am.

Victor:  Well she isn’t very familiar with Ronald McDonald.

me:  I’M NOT RONALD MCDONALD.  Seriously, you guys?

Hailey: Give me another hint.

me: “Don’t be a hater, dear.”

Hailey:  I give up.  Who is mom supposed to be?

Victor:  She’s Wendy’s.

me: wtf

Hailey:  Oh.  Well you should be wearing blue and carrying a frosty.

me:  I hate you both.

Victor:  We’re just kidding.  We know you’re…Ron Weasley’s grandma?

Hailey:  Oh my God, totally.  You nailed it, mom.

PS.  For those of you who do not watch American Horror Story, I’m Myrtle Snow.  Well, Myrtle Snow on a fifty dollar budget.

PPS.  They maybe have a point.  Have a frosty.

 

135 replies. read them below or add one

  1. Hehe, I would have never of thought of Ronald McDonald. You look great in your character costume.

    Like

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  2. You’re definitely more recognizable as Wendy.

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  3. I am dressing up as Belldandy from my favorite anime Ah My Goddess!

    Liked by 1 person

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  4. Hahaha I love your costume! Even though I don’t watch AHS.

    Like

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  5. WHY NOT BOTH?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. That’s incredibly cute, even though I have NO idea who Myrtle Snow is because I quit watching AHS after the first season because it gave me nightmares.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. I think you rocked Merytl! Wendy also. Of course now i want a frosty and my roommate who worked for Wendy’s just lost his job so the frosty fairy Isn’t sticking my fridge anymore.

    Like

  8. I almost thought you photoshopped yourself as Wendy! The resemblance is uncanny 🙂 Both costumes are great 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. The Myrtle wig needs more crimping, except don’t do that because it might start on fire and HELLO she was already burned at the stake once. Seriously, that’s awesome. And the Wendy is disturbingly good…I need to go get a frosty.

    Like

  10. BALENCIAGA!!!!!

    Like

  11. Go as Myrtle Frosty. Problem SOLVED.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. for what it’s worth, i guessed Myrtl just from the picture. She is one of my favs too. ❤️

    i hope they were just fucking with you, bc that costume is PERFECT

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I am not an AHS girl but totally dig the red hair and outfit. But really-a Frosty is always a good thing!

    Like

  14. I knew who you were supposed to be, the problem is you’re just too young and adorable, and Myrtle is more mature and stern than you are. Time hasn’t etched you enough. Wendy is good, too though! Maybe you can score a free frosty! 😉

    Like

  15. I ADORE HER! She’s on my list of world’s greatest gingers.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I guessed Myrtle too! You look fabulous!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I’m going as Tonks from Harry Potter, and I had to explain it to everyone at our Halloween party this weekend. sigh

    Liked by 3 people

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  18. 18
    A Nony Mouse
            I knew!!! I knew the moment I saw you. Of course, having seen her recently on AHS, four (?) seasons after she was originally on, helps. Isn't it great that they are linking this season with Coven and Murder House? Am I WAY to excited over a TV show? Well, who cares, if it makes me happy and it makes you happy then that's great!   
    

    (It’s so good this season! ~ Jenny)

    Like

  19. Have fries with that!

    Like

  20. Is it weird that it kinda makes me want to eat cotton candy?

    Like

  21. The child, she is like her father. Teach her that he is always wrong now, before it is too late…

    Liked by 3 people

  22. I’d it’s any help, I knew exactly who you were dressed as! 😁

    Like

  23. 23
    Laurie and the "Girls"

    Now I want a Frosty!

    Like

  24. I IMMEDIATELY knew who you were. This is an excellent, excellent costume.

    Like

  25. You got two costumes in one for under $50! Bonus!
    I don’t watch AHS, but from the pics, I’d say you did a great job.

    Like

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  26. 26
    celesteepstein561

    I knew it right away!! I win!!

    Like

  27. A little Pipi Longstrocking thrown in (last photo)? Or maybe Wendy is Pipi?

    Like

  28. I knew right away and had a flipping heart attack because it’s perfect.

    Like

  29. Well personally, I think you nailed Myrtle Snow!! 😁

    Like

  30. YES Myrtle!! Love the costume, love her, and love you! 🙂

    Like

  31. Your Wendy is the best, just need the blue pigtail bows and the 5 freckles per cheek (face not butt, but your choice I guess).

    Like

  32. Holy shit. You make a better Wendy than the ACTUAL WENDY!

    Liked by 1 person

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  33. Not enough orange in the hair.

    Like

  34. 34
    Martina Burin

    Did you give up on the Halloween movie challenge? Any new fav’s?

    Like

  35. BALENCIAGAAAAAA

    Like

  36. Don’t listen to them. You nailed it.

    Like

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  37. I might have guessed Kathy Griffin. I’m surprised they didn’t guess Lucille Ball.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. I love your whole family so much.

    Like

  39. I thought it was a red headed version of Cruella de Vil.

    Liked by 2 people

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  40. 40
    Tracey Taylor

    I thought maybe Patricia Fields.

    Like

  41. 41
    Sarah Ricard

    I recognized her right away! Big fan of AHS hihi 🙂

    Like

  42. Hilarious! My husband and I dress up as Morticia and Gomez Addams every year. The neighborhood kids don’t ever know who we are. Lol.

    Like

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  43. OMG I saw the pic and was like tell me she didn’t but you did. I love her she’s amazing she’s of my favorites. Plus this season is amazing. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 Job well done. Now another AHS character

    Like

  44. I knew it! And AHS tends to freak me out to much to watch it. Although in this case the photo of you as Wendy is scaring me far more!

    Like

  45. I can’t watch that show … too scary. You on the other hand are adorable and hilarious!

    Like

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  46. It’s been a hot minute since I watched AHS, so I didn’t recognize the character at first. I think maybe because you’re quite a bit younger than Frances Conroy also. I was trying to think of younger characters. Once I saw the inspiration images, though, that’s really spot-on!

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  47. I’ve never seen American Horror Story, but your costume is wonderful!
    The kids and I always do a family costume. I feel very lucky that the older ones are still willing to go along with it! They usually take their younger siblings trick-or-treating. Last year they were all from Steven Universe: Elephant (16) was Blue Diamond, Jack (15) was Lars, Butterfly (12) was Connie, Cheetah (9) was Steven, and Ladybug (4) was Amethyst. I was Steven’s mother, Rose Quartz.
    This year the kids agreed, after a bit of debate, on going as Star Wars characters (other contenders were Little Witch Academia or Marvel). Cheetah called dibs on Kylo Ren the second someone mentioned Star Wars, Elephant’s being Vice Admiral Holdo, Jack’s being Poe Dameron (and carrying around a Finn plush – the kids all “ship” Poe and Finn), Butterfly’s still deciding between Rey and Rose (hurry up, kid! I’ve got to start sewing in the next couple days if I want it done in time) and my favorite costume: Ladybug is being a porg! I’m old-school, so I’m going to be Leia.

    Like

  48. 48
    Michell L DuBose

    I knew exactly who you were!! And I absolutely love and admire it!!!

    Like

  49. Do I get points for actually thinking immediately that you were Myrtle? Although, to be completely honest, I couldn’t think of her name. But I knew AHS and that character right away.

    Like

  50. My daughter and I are going to be two of the Fabulous Killjoys (Party Poison/her, Fun Ghoul/me).. so you’re in good company. No one who isn’t a fan of My Chemical Romance and/or Gerard Way’s comic series will have any idea who we are, LOL!

    Like

  51. I knew right away! Great job!

    Like

  52. Omg. Your smile as Wendy just gave me life (as the kids say)

    Like

  53. OMG Jenny Forrest Gump voice you make an awesome looking “Wendy”. You nailed that one for sure! You also look great as Ron Weasley’s grandmother. I think you would make a fabulous Poison Ivy (circa Batman & Robin 1997).

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  54. “She’s WENDY’s”???? SERIOUSLY, VICTOR????
    This is fantastic, Jenny! BALENCIAGAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

    Like

  55. Yellow dish washing gloves to mimic Myrtle’s yellow ones, and you’re ready for your close up. But the Wendy’s costume is pretty amazing too.

    Like

  56. i TOTALLY knew you were Myrtle Snow.

    Like

  57. Myrtle Snow awesomeness! I would understand their cluelessness IF THEY HADN’T JUST WATCHED THE SHOW! I mean, really.

    Like

  58. Balenciaga!

    Like

  59. OMG I was right! The moment I saw that picture I thought you were supposed be her! How could they not know this?

    Also, I love how AHS is bringing back earlier story lines and characters. This show is reminding me more and more of (the original) Dark Shadows by the way they use the same actors as different characters in different times and places.

    Like

  60. I once was Madame DeFarge from “A Tale Of Two Cities” – peasant-ish dress and cap, and I carried around some simple knitting on red-white-and-blue yarn. Every so often I would stand and stare at people significantly while knitting a couple rows.

    Everyone thought I was Betsy Ross instead.

    Like

  61. Wendy’s! Now I am craving a cheeseburger (to make up for the 20 minute wait for a few items in an empty fast food restaurant with Golden Arches that had flies everywhere, garbage on the tables, and dirty bathrooms with no automatic door openers for accessibility…)

    Like

  62. I knew right away who you were!! Excellent costume!

    Like

  63. Ha! I go as a disgruntled teacher every year and everyone knows what I am.

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  64. Jenny I knew it immediately when I saw it! You should have screamed, “ Balenciaga!” them. My daughter and I are huge fans of AHS too😊 You totally nailed it! Your daughter looks fantastic!

    Like

  65. Just spritz the wig with a little water and put in in smaller braids that start at the root. Let it dry overnight & unbraid. You can also get tiny sticking rhinestones at the craft store to put in the corners of your glasses.

    Like

  66. I came here to type, “BALENCIAGAAAAA!”, but several others beat me to the punch. Now all you need is a theremin…

    Like

  67. I knew who you were!

    Like

  68. I knew immediately who you were!

    It might be the cut and color of the wig that threw them off.

    Like

  69. YES to “Me’s” suggestions (comment #65), but I’d also suggest trimming the hair so you’d get Myrtle’s bad chop cut.
    As for Wendy…I’m forever silently wondering why the logo design has m-o-m written beneath her chin before I realize I’m looking at her collar. Stick with Myrtle. You can never go wrong with Myrtle. Classy af.

    Like

  70. I love it. I got it right away, too. Maybe if you carried a theremin?

    Like

  71. Yeeess!I knew it was Mrytle! Another AHS fan grooving on this season as well. Awesome costume! Well done.

    Like

  72. Oohhh! I love frosties!! But my Podunk Texas town will never be good enough for a Wendy’s. Poop!

    Like

  73. Honestly, Myrtle was my first thought. Grace Coddington was my second.

    Like

  74. LOVE you as WENDY!! You are better than she is 🙂

    Like

  75. We do have a dairy Queen though, what Texas town doesn’t?

    Like

  76. You are way prettier than Myrtle Snow!

    Like

  77. I TOTALLY knew you were Myrtle, which I STILL can’t spell without help. And now I want to re-watch that season of AHS, because I still have to watch all the recorded episodes of this season, but I’m being lazy.

    Like

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  78. If you were trying to look like that picture, you’re spot on! And you make a cute Wendy. Me, I have to be a vertabrae in a spine. Not even the damn brain—just a piece of backbone.

    Like

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  79. I do not share your zeal for horror, but the smile and the gingham blouse are adorable.
    Full-size Snickers for you young lady! And would you care for an extra candy to enjoy later?

    Like

  80. I guessed Myrtl from the picture right away! She is def one of my favorites also!! I think you did great!

    Like

  81. I knew who you were immediately. Hair needs a bit of a blunt trim, tho. (Then, Haley and Victor will know!)

    Like

  82. If you’re ever going to have an excuse to buy a theremin, it’s now. Just saying.

    Like

  83. 84
    officerripley

    Myrtl’s great. But I’ve decided I want to be excessively, heart-stoppingly scary this year so I’m gonna do Halloween as an “intelligent, believable, liberal woman.” That oughta scare half the population anyway. (And I bet you can guess which half, :D)

    Like

  84. You’re adorable.

    Like

  85. I knew it right away. I absolutely LOVE that show! And Myrtle Snow is one of my favorite characters. How could you not love someone who is so absolutely herself like Myrtle is? ❤

    Like

  86. Haha I haven’t watched the show since it originally aired but I got who you were – it’s all in the attitude! Probably my favourite ever season. Though I spent most of Murder House watching through my fingers… (Props for sourcing a crimped red wig!)

    Like

  87. Is it sacrilegious to say I’m enjoying her character much more this season than I did during the actual Coven season? (Also I’m being bullied by teenage girls to keep up with episodes. So mean.) https://possumscatsthingsgnawingatme.wordpress.com/2018/10/21/the-horror-of-disconnection/

    Like

  88. I wouldn’t have gotten it, sorry. However, kudos to you for being original and picking something obscure and also something from horror. You are a true Halloween fan, Jenny.

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  89. I knew immediate who you were! I just watched Coven and am looking forward to catching the current season.

    Like

  90. Did you know that if you look carefully, the word “mom” is written in Wendy’s collar?

    Like

  91. Oops. Somebody already beat me to the mom comment. Never mind.

    Like

  92. Why are you dressing like Pippi Longstocking? 😄

    Like

  93. LOVE!!!

    Like

  94. My first thought was Myrtle Snow… you need a melon baller

    Like

  95. I REALLY need to finish American Horror Story. Everyone else in my house thought it was too dark and scary, and we stopped about halfway through S3….

    Like

  96. OMG – so obvious you are Myrtle Snow!! Haters…

    Like

  97. I had no clue because I’m too much of a scaredy-cat to watch a single episode of AHS, but I loooove the outfit regardless!!

    Like

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  98. I feel you. I dressed up as Susan Sto Helit ( Death’s granddaughter from Terry Pratchetts Discworld) last year. My hubs was the O God Of Hangovers. Before that I was the Doctor (version 10 1/2. ). I mean maybe I get not recognizing Susan ( my daughter did) but The Doctor??? Even if I did combine 10 and 11.

    Like

  99. 100
    Heather Burdick

    I totally knew as soon as I read TV show. Maybe more frizz in the hair and they would have gotten it? Idk. I think you look great

    Like

  100. 101
    ocularnervosa

    Scary Wendy is better.

    Like

  101. No – I totally got it! You nailed it! Love it.

    Like

  102. 🤔

    Like

  103. Hahahaha, this is too funny. I have the same problem. Nobody ever guesses Phyllis Diller or her twin, Dyllis Philler… I don’t understand why…

    Like

  104. I love America Horry Story, and Coven is my favorite season. It’s no surprise that I guessed it right away lol. I love your costume!

    Like

  105. I am so proud of myself that I knew it was Myrtle right away!!! Also, you look faaaaabulous!

    Like

  106. Yeah, totally thought you were channeling Grace Coddington before I read the conversation (also, had to google ‘fashion mag editor with crazy hair’ because I couldn’t remember her name) 🤣.

    Like

  107. Hahaha! They are BOTH so good.

    Like

  108. I love your Blog! It makes me smile, cry, laugh and give me hope when life doesn’t seem so hopeful.
    I like both costumes, however being a total chicken about scary shows I haven’t seen American Horror.

    Like

  109. 110
    Just Another Sarah

    OMG – in that last photo you totally look like Vanessa Bayer!

    Like

  110. For the record, I immediately thought you were Myrtle, but that Wendy costume is also great

    Like

  111. I dressed up as Coco Chanel one year, and not only did people not recognize me (because I evidently don’t have compatible friends), one of my friends didn’t know that Coco Chanel was a real person and not just a perfume.

    Like

  112. I recognized it right away!

    Like

  113. I got it right away! But then I doubted myself because your hair was too nice, lol.

    Like

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  114. 115
    Pat Rousseau

    Wendy….

    Like

  115. 116
    Tonya Wyles

    I’m going as Emotional Support Peacock Lady (from back in Jan). No one is going to get it, but I will love it!

    Like

  116. Jenny,
    Tell us the rest of your October movie list.
    Maureen

    Like

  117. I totally got it awesome Costume! I have cancer so I don’t have any hair and I’m going as one of the coneheads!!
    The mom!!!(I yell!!!) my daughter: 🤦‍♀️

    Like

  118. Ps: I am a new fan I just read both your books! They where so funny but still very meaningful. Thank you for sharing your story!

    Like

  119. pss: sorry comments where almost 120 so it needed one more!!!

    Like

  120. I feel your pain. I’m going as a character from an obscure webcomic that is also one of my favorite stories ever. I have fully given up on anyone but my family recognizing it, but I think it’ll still be cool.

    Like

  121. I don’t watch American Horror Story but you’re absolutely killing it as Wendy.

    Like

  122. 123
    potato queen

    We just binge-watched “Coven” for the first time and I totally recognized your Myrtle!

    Like

  123. Its perfect! Maybe you need a “dahh-ling” thrown in there 🙂

    Like

  124. Brilliant!
    Okay, I really don’t know who Myrtle is, but I can relate to the “WTF, people!!!” part.
    Here was my epic, ‘best costume ever that no one got’ year: I dressed in all blue, tied a chicken around my neck that was hanging from a cord…
    Any takers? ;o)

    Like

  125. I knew who you were right away!

    Like

  126. Fantastic! I knew from the first picture.
    Awesome costume. ❤

    Like

  127. I just love you. We recently listed to your audio book, Furiously Happy! I was surprise how much I was able to relate to you. I am a breast caner survivor and during my post-cancer treatment I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I was embarrassed, but after listening to you, I realized, I’m not alone. Not in the sense you’re going to be by my side….but in the sense I’m not the only person and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Life happens…..So thank you for creating this wonder blog and books. A forever fan!!!!

    Like

  128. Totally got it…….Love Myrtle!….I am more a Misty for various batshitcrazy reasons!

    Like

  129. 130
    Jessica Son

    I knew right away you were Myrtle. Nice!!
    Pretty awesome as Wendy too. 👻

    Like

  130. Nooo…I totally knew who you were before reading to the bottom. Chris and I LOVE American Horror Story and we love how they are taking all the previous years and putting them into this one. Though I don’t know how they’ll add the circus and asylum, or if they ever will. My only complaint is I have a severe phobia of snakes so I wish the intro didn’t have all the damn snakes!

    Like

  131. If I had $50 I’d totally go buy that outfit! It would make me so happy! You look amazing!!! Thanks for the smile. I needed it today. I’ve been in bed for two days. I’m out from work due to some random mystery disease they can’t diagnose, I randomly pass out without any warning. It’s real fun to be me right now. Thanks for letting me be part of your tribe.

    Like

  132. American Horror Story is AWESOME,!

    Like

  133. Ha! The girl that used to do all the Wendy’s commercial is on my “list”.
    https://www.justasmallcog.com/2018/01/24/the-one-with-the-list/

    Like

  134. 135
    Carol Anne Fusco

    I know you did it for laughs,but I have to say that you look really pretty in the red wig!

    Like

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