Babies are the worst kind of birds.

So cupid is like the mascot of Valentine’s Day but basically it’s a baby, right?  At first I thought it was an angel which would be sort of sweet but ultimately questionable because that means the ghost of a dead baby is making you want to have sex with people and that’s weird.

Then I did some research and turns out that cupid is not an angel but is instead a God of Erotic Love (who also happens to be a baby for some reason?) and I guess it’s because sex makes babies but it still doesn’t make sense because babies are the worst and now they have wings?  Have you met babies?  They shit everywhere and they’re always barfing.  The only thing worse is if you gave it a weapon, WHICH SOMEONE DID.

I explained all of this to Victor and he just stared at me but probably because he just realized that he’s only in love with me because he got shot by some invisible aeronautic toddler.

PS. I waited until after Valentine’s Day to post this because I know some of you love it and I don’t want to shit all over it when you’re enjoying it.  Unlike certain flying babies.  Just saying.

88 replies. read them below or add one

  1. As always Jenny you insight is spot on! Yes babies are well, babies and I don’t believe in Cupid because the motherfucker has always brought me losers. So if I see him/her/it I’m going to shoot it down with it’s own arrow…..I’m just saying.

    Liked by 9 people

    thehuntress915 recently posted Happy Valentine’s Day to You and Your Dodge Duster!.

  2. Adore…thanks for making people happy!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. from the google “Cupid. … According to myth, Cupid was the son of Mercury, the winged messenger of the gods, and Venus, the goddess of love. He often appeared as a winged infant carrying a bow and a quiver of arrows whose wounds inspired love or passion in his every victim.” so there ya go..blame Sailor Mercury and Sailor Venus…:D

    Liked by 4 people

  4. Maybe it was just a reminder that sometimes where there is love, babies happen.

    Like

    jono51 recently posted Still winter.

  5. from the google: “Cupid. … According to myth, Cupid was the son of Mercury, the winged messenger of the gods, and Venus, the goddess of love. He often appeared as a winged infant carrying a bow and a quiver of arrows whose wounds inspired love or passion in his every victim.” so there ya go… sailor mercury and sailor venus are the culprits. right?

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Ok…Personally I believe in Eros, as a fully grown male god. But if you really want to be shot by a baby, good for you?

    Liked by 1 person

    Tanya Goffy recently posted We Regret To Inform You: College Reject Does Unrealistic Things Out Of Denial.

  7. My thoughts about sex, love and babies exactly.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I’m with you, Jenny. Armed invisible aeronautic toddlers are terrifying.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Maybe Cupid and Baby New Year are twins!

    Liked by 1 person

    OwnLessDoMore.us recently posted None of the above: a sojourner meanders through the 2020 Census.

  10. This is the most accurate description of babies that I’ve ever read. Thanks for the good laugh on a long Friday!

    Liked by 2 people

    romcomdojo recently posted Tony Danza’s and My Shared Sensuality: We Explore Astrology.

  11. I’d never considered this aspect of Cupid before – thanks for enlightening me – and making me laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. 12
    Stacey Anderson

    OMG yes! It’s like if spiders could fly!

    Liked by 3 people

  13. YES! Thank You! As always, Jenny says what others fear to blurt out loud.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Maybe the cupid baby is able to handle his own needs? Or somehow is unable to defecate… but now I’m disturbed about the poop covered arrows cause what if he doesn’t wash his hands?? Fuck…

    Liked by 3 people

  15. Excellent evaluation of VD 🙂 haha thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. i love that you get it.

    Like

  17. I agree 100%

    Like

  18. Invisible aeronautic toddler needs to be the name of a band.

    Liked by 2 people

  19. see the awesome Michael Penn song “Cupid’s Got a Brand New Gun” … brilliant lyrics

    Like

  20. a most excellent observation, I don’t get the whole valentines day thing but I know it’s a big deal to a lot of people.

    Like

  21. Okay, so this baby is flying around with his twig and berries and bum exposed. Why give him a bow and arrows when he has perfectly good weapons already? Hear me out, because it makes sense: love can involve getting shit o, that British gem about taking the piss, and of course, getting dumped. The bow and arrow is redundant.

    Liked by 4 people

    ReallyLoriRose recently posted Two cents’ on winter and capital punishment (because they go hand-in-hand, right?).

  22. This isn’t related to the above post but I thought you would enjoy this. I know I did: https://youtu.be/Vqbk9cDX0l0
    Enjoy!

    Like

  23. And, Cupid is almost always shown swaddled, wearing something diaper like, with a carefully draped cloth, or naked with baby junk. Nobody wants to see that!
    #IShootFlyingCherubs

    Liked by 2 people

  24. Solid points. Also, Cupid was typically depicted not wearing a diaper. Which is even more terrifying. And we thought living in a world with pigeons was bad. shudder

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Depicting Cupid as an infant is an artistic invention, probably because he would take up less space on canvas (lol) and artists could show more naked skin. Using greco-roman themes was a work around so that artists could paint naked women. I can go all art history on you if you like, but Eros/Cupid is really an adult who has been cutsied down over the centuries, so I think we’re safe from yak and poo.🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Shit on. Not Shit o. Shit o sounds like an unappetizing breakfast cereal.

    Liked by 2 people

  27. This isn’t related to the above post but I thought you would enjoy this. I know I did: https://youtu.be/Vqbk9cDX0l0
    Enjoy!

    Like

  28. I wish there was a card for Happy Erotic God of Love Day!

    Liked by 1 person

    mindyqs recently posted 4 Life Skills That Will Teach Kids How to Shoulder Responsibility.

  29. I’ve never understood why the Roman Cupid was a baby when his Greek equivalent, Eros, was a full grown man. But then again, Rome did have a knack for twisting things until they were unrecognizable.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Invisible aeronautic toddler would be an amazing band name…I’ve never understood why Cupid was a baby either. Babies are the opposite of sexy and the presence of an actual baby in the house makes making more babies a losgistal nightmare…

    Liked by 2 people

    knockingonfortysdoor recently posted Pain Spanx….

  31. Grounded babies make me nervous. Flying weaponized babies make me terrified.

    Liked by 2 people

  32. We don’t really do this thing in Australia. I know it as condom day.

    Liked by 2 people

    Gaz recently posted Big thick juicy meaty steak or a skinny steak?.

  33. The sweet boy I babysit, said he liked babies but didn’t like that they pooped in their pants. I asked him where they should go and without hesitation he said “Outside!” 😂😂😂😂😂

    Liked by 3 people

  34. The idea of weaponized love is too scary to think about which is why cupids skeeve me out. I FEEL THAT THEY ARE VERY BAD PEOPLE.
    Maybe they’re not babies but dwarves. Or some kind of gnome. That would totally make more sense. Just keep them away from me, no matter what they are.

    Liked by 1 person

    Shannon akaMonty recently posted Double the fun! Or more likely double, double, toil and trouble..

  35. You people, all of you, make my day on a regular basis and I never remember to tell you. So thanks, and happy day after!

    Liked by 2 people

  36. Next year’s valentine – I’m gonna shit and vomit my love all over you.

    Liked by 2 people

    theycallmetater recently posted My Week in Books, TV, and Movies 2/15/19.

  37. I love your brain.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. What are you talking about? Angels are not dead people or ghosts.

    Liked by 1 person

    Wenona Lee Gardner recently posted Native American Witches Growing.

  39. Once I became a parent, I exclaimed at dinner spontaneously “ why do they say slept like a baby?!?!? The saying should be slept like a single person.”

    Liked by 4 people

  40. This is so funny! I laughed multiple times. And in these dark days, that’s an amazing thing. THANK YOU Jenny! I spent Valentine’s Day with my dog because my husband was working day and night. I was not really interested in going too far with my dog, nor he with me I’m happy to say (even though he’s a poodle.) I asked the baby to pass over my house, and left a sugary candy smashed on my door so he’d take it and pass over my house. It seemed to work. Hmmmm…a new holiday?

    Liked by 2 people


  41. This baby could be cupid! If the link doesn’t work, it’s on YouTube as Toddler Boom Chicka
    He dances and sing the song. If he doesn’t invoke feelings of love, at the very least it is hilarious and will make you laugh

    Liked by 1 person

  42. Shit and barf everywhere? Sounds like a cat to me. Just sayin’

    Liked by 1 person

  43. I hate Valentines Day. We don’t celebrate it. It is also my sister in laws birthday and I definitely don’t want to celebrate that. So my husband and I celebrate Ferris Wheel day instead (also 2/14) because what says I Love You better than a spinning wheel of death?

    Like

  44. I don’t care who or what Cupid is … as long as I keep getting a box of chocolate in the deal.

    Liked by 2 people

  45. I agree with this entire post! Thanks, as always, for the laugh. The best part is “which someone did!”

    Liked by 2 people

  46. I don’t care who or what Cupid is … as long as I keep getting chocolates in the deal.

    Like

  47. Lol….your relationship with Victor is priceless! I love reading about his responses.

    Like

  48. NAKED baby with a weapon.

    Liked by 2 people

    mydangblog recently posted My Week 229: Facebook Doesn’t Know Me At All.

  49. Ok, now i can’t get the image of babies, puking and shitting mid-flight, out of my head

    Liked by 2 people

  50. I never really paid attention to the Cupid mythos, but when you put it that way…

    Liked by 1 person

    reneewittman recently posted Our Hotel Might Have Been on Fire… Hard to Tell.

  51. … also I might note that I am at my LEAST romantic when someone is bleeding. Then it’s time for a Modified Stationary Panic and possibly bandages.

    Liked by 1 person

  52. Check out Eilen Jewell’s song “Bang Bang Bang” for a delightful song about that little psychopath who makes people fall in love! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ii432ZJmre4

    Like

  53. 55
    Heather Torrey

    An invisible aeronautic toddler deity. That’s why we love you. 🙂

    Like

  54. I always thought it might be the same baby from who framed rodger rabbit…i assume since he’s old enough to smoke a cigar that he could handle a weapon. I think the movie addressed his age as well. Plus since hes so angry I bet hed enjoy stabbing people, even if its remotely

    Liked by 1 person

  55. About the best I can say on Cupid is that at least it isn’t some kind of giant mosquito. That would suck.

    Liked by 1 person

  56. Google image search for “where Nutella comes from”. It’s positively cherubic.

    Like

  57. 59
    Amber Biliouris

    Lets just hope that toddler doesn’t need glasses

    Like

  58. 60
    Jessica Johannesen

    I might have to disagree with the weapon making them worse. I think making them airborne while shitting and barfing is the problem. I’m not overly worried about the weapon because their hand-eye coordination is shit and so are their motor skills. I think i could evade the arrow. but that barf man…

    Like

  59. I was just talking about this with someone. Not about the shitting baby with arrow but that Cupid is an angel baby. It makes no sense. I never liked Valentine’s Day anyway. Just the fact that it’s a God of erotic love who happens to be a baby is creepy.

    Like

  60. Now Valentine’s day sounds interesting. Thanks for that!

    Liked by 1 person

    becomingcliche recently posted Fans of the Bloggess, Beat the Mid-Winter Blahs With BOOKS!.

  61. Read Apuleius’ tale of Cupid & Psyche. He ain’t no baby.

    Like

  62. At first I misread aeronautic as autoerotic, and it still kinda makes sense.

    Like

  63. And what’s with the tiny wings? It’s a puzzle all the way around.

    Liked by 1 person

  64. It should be “aeronautic EROTIC toddler. Internal rhyme for the win. I do not love Valentines. Did hot yoga, grossed out the instructor with my snot explosion, ate Chipotle, took some NyQuil and called it a day. https://possumscatsthingsgnawingatme.wordpress.com/2019/02/14/valentine-booty/

    Like

  65. Ever since Tangled (my favorite Disney flick), Cupid is a little old drunk dude in a diaper hitting on Mother Gothel.

    Like

    Kelly's Cancer Beat Down Blog recently posted Cancer Is No Gift But It Gave Me Sobriety.

  66. But…Father Valentine was a priest who got burned at the stake for marrying people when someone declared it illegal.. then he became St. Valentine
    ..so not sure where the hell this baby came in?

    Like

  67. 69
    Morticias Mom

    But…Father Valentine was a priest who got burned at the stake for marrying people after someone decided marriage was illegal and then he became St. Valentine…not sure where the hell this baby came from? Kinda like the Easter Bunny I guess….

    Like

  68. Yeah, I always assumed they used the baby because it makes it look more innocent. Cupid is basically Eros who is also depicted as a young man. But the baby thing is creepy.

    Like

  69. Maybe Cupid is a baby in a diaper just to remind us that the product of lust is really just MORE BABIES! Haha, I’ve got two kids right now, and I really want want another, but the reminder of the sagging crap-filled diaper is just enough to remind me to be happy with what I have. Happy Vagina Day ladies!

    Like

    Becky Weaver recently posted When Seasonal Depression Almost Killed Me.

  70. Victor just needs to stop and thank his lucky stars more often. I mean, how boring would his life be without these kinds of conversations?

    Liked by 1 person

    candidkay recently posted Dust off your crown.

  71. Have you checked out the lyrics to My Funny Valentine? WTF???!!! How is that a romantic song?

    Like

  72. I think they’re called puti in Italian art, which loosly translates to “fat little boy with wings” also it’s a fun word for lady gardens

    Like

  73. Angels as dead humans? To quote a fictional demon/ex-angel: “We’re distinct beings, not dead humans with little wings! Where do you people go for spiritual guidance, ‘The Family Circus’?”

    Like

  74. Cupids have always freaked me out a little. I categorize them under “clown-like entities”. But wait. Back up. WHY DID SOMEONE SAY ‘FLYING SPIDERS’?

    Like

    Lille recently posted what i found in my laundry sink.

  75. Haha! The other day I was saying that it was so cold out that Cupid would never be able to handle flying around naked/diapered. He’d need a heavy jacket and snow boots and mittens. Might impede his dexterity enough that he couldn’t use that bow and arrow?

    Liked by 1 person

  76. thank you for making me giggle.

    Like

  77. I really and truly am grateful for your consideration in delaying your post until the day after. It’s been too long since I have been back here to read your stuff, and I have to say that… HOLY CRAP! I HAVE MISSED THE GOSH DANG SHIT OUT OF YOU.

    OMG – I totally just realized… these angel babies flying around everywhere are probably where we even GET the Holy Crap to begin with!

    Like

    Keaven Neely recently posted Moe the Rottie.

  78. This is also weird because especially in the US, we’re obsessed with keeping babies and small children completely unaware of sex, so now there’s some sex-crazed infant out there helping us fall in love by shooting us in the butt with arrows? CUE THE PROTESTS!

    Like

  79. If you watch Supernatural, Cupid is a big naked dude who goes around hugging everyone, making them feel awkward, until a main character punches him in the face, and makes him cry, and ultimately disappear. “Dude, you just punched an angel” … “No, I punched a dick”. Sorry. My fave show, and I have this persistent need to quote it wherever possible.

    Like

    Mamacita recently posted Survival Games.

  80. Valentine’s day has always been a useless hyped up crappy holiday to me.I was tormented in school by some bullies who thought it would be fun,to make me believe I had a secret admirer. They revealed themselves on Valentine’s day. The losers I have dated are usually gone before valentines day. I’ve yet to have a romantic man date me,sadly attesting my lack of good taste in men.The only males I trust at the moment are my pets.

    Like

  81. Eros aka Cupid is a full grown man/god. The cherubic archer. I don’t know who came up with that. Probably the Renaissance era artists.

    Like

  82. I absolutely appreciate you waiting until after Valentines Day to massacre it. Yes, the baby with the arrow thingy seems weird. I’m just glad it’s all over! Now we can all go back to being unhappy again whether we are with someone or single. Yay!

    Like

    Michael Rochelle recently posted Pickles and Pregnancies.

  83. This is why Shakespeare describes Cupid’s arrows as “the blind bow-boy’s butt-shafts.” In Romeo and Juliet. Sounds bitter.

    Like

  84. My thoughts on Cupid exactly. WTF. (Also agree with post #83 above – Eros is the god of erotic love, and he’s not a baby. He’s actually the one the Beast in Beauty and the Beast is based on. Beauty would be Psyche. This story has been rehashed more times than IHOP’s potatoes.) You’re not alone in your wonderment. I can only assume it makes sense to the gods somehow.

    Like

  85. Okay, so this baby is flying around with his twig and berries and bum exposed. Why give him a bow and arrows when he has perfectly good weapons already?

    Like

  86. So my FRIEND who writes Valentine’s Day cards professionally thinks that this should all be on a Valentine’s Day card, and that would be the last Valentine’s Day card she would ever personally need.

    Like

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