It’s Friday and I’m cuddled up on the couch so come join me but wear a mask.

Today is Friday and that means I have videos for you, but also I’m sick so instead of inviting you into my office I’m inviting you onto the couch where I am currently cuddled up and I am spraying myself with lysol just for you. Luckily it’s not covid or the flu (GET YOUR BOOSTERS, Y’ALL) and is just the cold that’s going around but I’m still feeling lightly pitiful and Victor is out of town so I would love it if you would braid my hair and turn on your favorite comfort show and tell me I’m being your little warrior.

Also, I have a light fever so if you don’t think these are funny it’s probably just because your brain isn’t as boiled as mine:

https://www.instagram.com/p/CkeIQU0qnVh/

Unrelated, the other day we were ordering food at Subway and the lady in front of us was talking some bs conspiracy theories and so I loudly said, “WE DIDN’T GET A SINGLE TRICK OR TREATER THIS YEAR AND NOW WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THIS FENTANYL?” and Victor got all big-eyed and was like, “wtf, Jenny” and I thought it was hilarious but I didn’t share it because I thought it was maybe too much but now I’m high on cough meds and it seems funny again. Sorry.

PS. I am going to jinx myself by asking this but am I the only one left who has never had covid? Because I’m all shitted up but I know other people who have had all their boosters and keep getting it and it’s weird that I never get it. Or maybe I get it but it’s super sneaky covid?

PPS. That last sentence was supposed to say that “I’m all shotted up” but autocorrect changed it and actually it’s probably pretty accurate so I’m just leaving it.

97 thoughts on “It’s Friday and I’m cuddled up on the couch so come join me but wear a mask.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. I have not had Covid yet either. Are we super humans? Should I give my body to science when I die? I am feeling very “special”.

  2. My wife and I haven’t it yet (that we’re aware of), either. Which is kind of weird to me because I usually get ALL the super nasty illnesses that go around. But I also read a study that was released recently talking about people with severe allergies not catching COVID as often for some reason they haven’t determined yet, and I was told by my allergist I should probably live in a plastic bubble my allergies are so bad, so maybe that’s it?

  3. I have not have COVID either. I have my shots but I have also been super careful because my father is 92 yo and my brother has stage 4 cancer – I help care for them and take them to appointments. I couldn’t live with myself if brought them COVID.

  4. Some of these things that amuse you mystify me 😂 but I love you regardless. ❤️❤️❤️

    And no, neither hubs nor I have had it yet either. And definitely know we were directly exposed at least once. So 🤷🏻‍♀️

  5. I might have had it right at the beginning but have never tested positive. I’m basically still in quarantine though, my immune system is broken and I have really bad asthma.

  6. I have not had COVID as far as I know. I did get SUPER sick in early 2020 though. Also, I now have hiccups from those videos.

  7. Haven’t had Covid yet either-at least I don’t think so. If I did it was very minor. All my adult kids have had it, multiple times. Must be because I am a recluse.
    BTW, love the off-leash dog 🙂

  8. I still haven’t had Covid. You are not alone. But two weeks ago I had a hell of a cold.

  9. All vaccines and boosters and still no COVID (that I know of), and I’m not even wearing a mask anymore and everyone around me is getting it and I’m just sitting here….waiting.

    Also, your fentanyl gag might be the best thing EVER.

  10. My husband, my dad, and myself have remained covid free as far as we can tell. Never tested positive despite many tests between us all. We are all vaccinated and boosted (including omicron variant).

  11. Neither my husband nor I have had Covid. We’ve had all our shots (including flu) and wear masks outside the home. No one comes inside our home without a mask, either.

  12. I finally got Covid in August but I’m convinced the shots made it go away much faster for me than my anti vax family/friends. It came out of nowhere; we hadn’t heard of anyone having it until I tested positive.

    Hope you feel better soon!

  13. My son and I, both vaxxed and boostered, haven’t had it, and he’s worked in a grocery store throughout the pandemic (my hero) so he’s very careful. I’m getting a new shrink and new therapist and I hate it. The therapist is not good. Made an appt with a different one. Why do I have to go thru this all the time? I really need help right now and instead I’m getting an intake evaluation questionnaire for the entire first appt. [insert crying emoji]. Depression and anxiety soaring. Trying to change self talk.

  14. I still haven’t gotten COVID, although I’m super convinced I had super sneaky COVID – my partner and I both got sick 2 weeks ago, same symptoms – although his quickly were worse. He tested positive right away, and I tested negative repeatedly over the course of 10 days- antigen, molecular and PCR. Seriously wonder if I had it and my viral load was so low it didn’t register. So still super worried about long COVID 🙁

  15. I haven’t had it, my mom hasn’t had it (thank god, she’s 72), and a few of my friends haven’t had it.
    Then again, the lot of us are paranoid folks who wear masks in public places still, so there you go.

  16. Love you Jenny. I am all shotted up too and have had 5 Covid scares with tests, and still no covid!!!

  17. Boostered and masked! Yay!!
    I also brought my own blankets!

    I hope you feel better. Do we need send you some tea?

    Lisa

  18. My daughter and I have not gotten COVID! Vaxxed and boosted and still wearing masks everywhere because COVID isn’t over! And now I have breast cancer and am on chemo, so I really can’t get it!

  19. I work in healthcare and haven’t had Covid yet… almost all my coworkers have had it at some point so 🤷‍♀️ I guess some people are just more resistant / more lucky

  20. Neither me nor my boyfriend have had it but everyone else we know has. We’re both vaxxed and have had 2 boosters, getting the 3rd one next week. 🤷‍♀️

  21. I haven’t had Covid yet, and hope I cam avoid it forever.

    I wish Instagram didn’t try to make you log in to view some of these – I don’t have an account and I don’t want one, but I *do* want to watch the videos. The shark one made me laugh for quite a while.

  22. I laughed at every one so I whipped out my forehead laser scanner thingamajig – yep, 100.1° YAY. Scoot over my little warrior. It’s been at least 20 years since I braided hair, so no mirrors ot selfies, ‘k?

    WhoamIkidding? I’d tie knots, you’d have to cut them out, and Victor would be angry.

  23. I finally got Covid last month, but I’m fully vaccinated and boosted so it was like a bad cold. My husband caught it first and he also got the nasty flu-like virus that isn’t the flu or Covid that is going around two months ago. I’m super allergic to everything and I had a bad reaction to Paxlovid Covid antiviral medicine, and I have asthma and many other autoimmune and comorbidity issues, but my doctor says she sees people all the time who have my allergies and multiple chemical sensitivities and autoimmune issues and medication intolerances often can handle serious illnesses easily. She thinks it’s because our immune systems are over reactive fighters that fight everything with a vengeance, which makes our immune systems super strong.
    Thank you for the funny videos, I’m having a really tough week, and I really needed to laugh. My favorite is the guy who got scared by the “snake” and the cat playing with the balloon.

  24. no COVID her but my daughter had it and i lterally forgot and drank out of her straw and thought sure i’d get it but nope…i think i’m immune!

  25. Friday evening in Hamburg, Germany,
    2 Gin & lemons (sugar-free) are long gone. The Prosecco after the Red Rice – Pulled Turkey fry-up just touched the TGIF spot.
    Hugs and enjoy your weekend.
    (PS: I just finished LPTNH after a two year hiatus. The break was because I was so disturbed by what your father did to you with his ‘joke’ ‘hand-puppet’. I just found it so incredibly mean of him that I was full of trepidation that the anecdotes might actually get worse.
    It was a matter of, once again, my past imposed itself on my present.
    PPS: Elon Musk has destroyed Twitter in just a few days. Any way to get him to buy Fox News?

  26. I, too, have never had it and sort of wonder “what’s the deal?” I’m all shitted up, too.

  27. No Covid yet for me either, but I am snotted up because of allergies. My autocorrect just changed snotted to snorted and I had to change it back.. Now I wonder what my iPad thinks I am doing.

    That family video with the little girl and dog made me laugh so hard I cried. Thanks! I really needed that tonight!

  28. I got covid in January of 2020 that put me in the hospital. (Went to a Caribbean resort where we had a very ill Chinese couple for neighbors. Sounded like the poor guy was going to die; maybe he did.) Pre testing, so it was August before I could get an antibody test. All shitted up here too. I do have long covid. It made my asthma so much worse, my hair fell out, most of 2020 and 2021 are a blur, and I still get crippling fatigue if I exert myself too much. I hold out hope that the fatigue will fade.
    My husband never got sick. Go figure.

  29. COVID finally caught me last month. Fully vaxxed and boosted, and just wanted to remind you and all your readers that the shots give your body the weapons that allow you to ride it out at home, not in an ER (or a hallway outside the ER) getting your breaths from a machine. It’s a virus, and humans haven’t figured out how to kill those, so we’re susceptible to catching it over, and over, and over….

    Loved the Friday pick-me-up, and hope you’re feeling perkier soon.

    Carolyn

  30. I have not had Covid, but I also have a bad cold that will not go away. Ugh. I appreciate the laughs but they made me cough.

  31. I told my husband your fentanyl comment you made behind the conspiracy theory lady at Subway. I know fentanyl is no joke; however, that cracked me up. He laughed out loud (and so did I).
    I adore you, Jenny!

  32. Fortunately I (and everyone in my house) haven’t had covid yet. We got our shots, we mask everywhere, we only go out when needed, we hiss at strangers.

  33. Love you! I have all the shots, and my whole family got it (they’re all at varied points on the shot track, but none complete like me). I was the lone one to not get covid. That was both a relief and rough all at once. Vaccines work, and also… it’s weird to be the immunocompromised one to not get it.

  34. I also haven’t have Covid. I’ve had ALL the shots, plus an extra full dose before the boosters came out. I did have shingles in December 2020, so that was fun (not). I highly recommend you do NOT get shingles.

  35. My husband and I, and both my parents, have still evaded covid so far, and I want to pretend it’s like we’ve got crazy immune systems or something but really I think it’s just that we are all pretty antisocial…

  36. My husband and I haven’t had covid yet either. My parents, on the other hand, said “I don’t need another covid shot” then went on vacation 2 weeks later and came home with it. Again.

  37. I am all shotted up too and have not had COVID. But I caught the cold from hell at the end of September so I was all shitted up then. I recommend staying in a hotel when sick like that. They bring you clean sheets, nice food, and are way more sympathetic than your family. If it ain’t COVID your family is all out of sympathy. We are all back to liking each other again.

  38. No Covid for me yet! But last week I got my first cold in 2.5 years and it turned into a sinus infection. Boooooooo! I’ll come a braid your hair for you once I’m done with the steroids. 🤧🤧

  39. Thank you for the friday laughs. No, you aren’t the only one. We’ve had all of the shots. My daughter and I have not had covid either yet. No colds or flus either. My husband and son have though.

  40. All shitted up and no covid here either. My daughter has had no shots, goddamnit, but also no covid even though her in laws have had a couple of bouts of it. I LOVE your fentamyl story and you are my brave, strong friend forever (I lack braiding skills however)

  41. Never had Covid. That one video of the Starbucks guy is comedian Todd Glass, so I’m sure that was a bit.

  42. I’m vaxxed and boosted for COVID and also got a flu shot. I got the flu a couple weeks after getting the flu shot, and lemme tell you, I wouldn’t have wanted to be less protected from it. It sucked!

    Jenny, need me to come do some laundry for you? I’m stuck in San Antonio until Monday. I was supposed to go back home to Garland tomorrow but our contractors are 2 days late finishing the work at our house and I am staying out of the way.

    (I adore you and you just made my day. But I’m starting to feel human again. 🙂 ~ Jenny)

  43. I’m vaxxed and boosted for COVID and also got a flu shot. Never have tested positive for COVID but I got the flu a couple weeks after getting the flu shot, and lemme tell you, I wouldn’t have wanted to be less protected from it. It sucked!

    Jenny, need me to come do some laundry for you? I’m stuck in San Antonio until Monday. I was supposed to go back home to Garland tomorrow but our contractors are 2 days late finishing the work at our house and I am staying out of the way.

  44. I only got Covid for the first time this August. My son had it last year and slept in my bed while he was sick and I didn’t get it then.

  45. Because you’re smart and aware! We haven’t gotten it. People travel and are just SHOCKED when they get it. It’s like, how at this point do you not understand? The pandemic isn’t over just because you’re over it, as the meme goes.

    Also, I have been in tears this week, every day, depression, grief, really deeply bad…when I watched that little girl get mauled by that puppy, I was laughing like a maniac. Couldn’t breathe. Thank you, I reeeeally needed that!

  46. p.s. I could French braid your hair, but only if you sit directly behind me and I reach behind my head to yours. That’s how we did it in the 80s, anyway!

  47. Your fentanyl story reminded me of a story David Sedaris tells. He’s riding with his sister. The subway gets to his sister’s stop and she gets off. As the doors are closing, she shouts back in to him, “Good luck beating that rape charge!”

  48. Same as most of the other folks – fully vaxxed with allll the early shots and the latest, had at least one exposure (for sure) that we know of, we’re working with at least one shitty-ass immune system (mine), and yet… haven’t gotten it yet. It’s mystifying. And now I’m knocking on every piece of wood in our house. *sigh* I’m totally going to get it anyway, aren’t I? Fucking hell…
    Also, this is my first comment and I’m a huge, huge fan. Yay for Jenny!!!

  49. Vaccines don’t prevent it, they just help combat it so its not worse (at least in theory, i know of two people who had the vaccines and boosters and still ended up in the hospital. Neither of which in a vulnerable category.)

  50. My husband finally got Covid 2 days ago. Funny cause he works at a hospital and we made it all this time. I was sick last weekend and it now seems suspicious that my Covid test was negative though. So another test for me today because I still have a bit of post nasal yuck. Fingers crossed.

  51. Fully boosted and vaccinated but I’ve had it twice. The TeleDick I saw was like “Welp, I guess you’re just one of those people.” Thanks for the science, dude.

  52. I haven’t had covid yet and hoping I can avoid it. I’m all vaxxed up, but ready to take a test since my husband shared his cold with me. I hope you feel better soon!

  53. No covid for either my husband or I. We both have all the boosters, and still mask up when out in the world. I haven’t eaten in a restaurant in ages.

  54. To AG at number 8 and all the other angels out there who are still masking in medical offices, groceries, etc.: thank you.Thank you from my heart and soul!

    You’re keeping your loved ones safe, but you’re also keeping people like me (autoimmune illness) and also my elderly friend who is valiantly fighting cancer safer.

  55. No COVID here yet. We did get the cold you have now and it about took my husband out. He’s on all kinds of meds to fight bronchitis and we’re on the watch for pneumonia. His nurse told him COVID would probably be a lot easier for him to deal with because we’re all boosted.

  56. No COVID here, fully shitted up, I attribute it to being super diligent about masking and public spaces for 2 1/2 years. But boy a cold just lays me out (I’m on day 7).

  57. Also no positive covid tests for me, and I’ve gotten all the shots. I still mask just in case I’m a Typhoid Mary, or I guess Covid Kristy.

  58. I’ve remained COVID-free. My girlfriend got it, a week after she broke up with me. She got over it, in both senses, as we’re now back together. 🙂

  59. No positive covid tests here either, but I have been trying very hard not to get it. I’m chronically ill and the shots had me in bed for 2 weeks and side effects for 2 months each time so I’ll pass on the real deal, thanks. I was so grateful that the flu shot “only” took me out for 3 days and then a few more with just a headache 🤣

  60. I’ve had all my shots but got Covid …but it was more like a cold than the flu. No fever..just a stuffy nose. It wasn’t serious because I had all my shots!

  61. I’m still Covid-free too! Fully vaccinated and boosted like everyone in my social circle and family, but so many STILL succumbed anyway. Maybe those of us who still haven’t gotten it are some sort of mutant? I’m okay with that, but was hoping for a more impressive super power.

  62. I’ve had covid four times and I just don’t want to anymore. My immune system has been shown the playbook by the vaccines but it takes a welcoming approach anyway. But me and artemesia annua have taken to playing defense. I hate sports.

  63. I quit wearing a mask months ago and I am not a particularly healthy person but I still haven’t gotten Covid either…..yet. I have had all five shots though.

  64. I quit my office job and now I am getting paid 120 Dollars hourly. How? I work over the internet! My old work was making me miserable, nx10 so I was forced to try-something different. 2 years later…I can say my life is changed completely for the better!
    Check it out what i do.. http://ritchwork24.blogspot.com

  65. My family of 5 adults (3 adult children who have their own places) has not had covid. Especially interesting is that my daughter is in occupational therapy and has worked face to face with covid patients rehabbing in nursing homes. Most of her coworkers have had it. We must have special genes!

  66. I have not had covid even though I’ve flown across the country to see my grand kids. I have gotten all the boosters tho, flu shot for this year.

  67. I have read (in the WaPo or NYT) that roughly 1 in 10 people have some lucky genetic thing that keeps them from ever getting covid. Maybe you are one of the lucky 10%?

  68. My husband and I haven’t had it either! We are very careful and wear our masks religiously! I only have one functional lung so I don’t want it.
    Plus I think you don’t run a temp with a cold, flu maybe?

  69. I am in good company here! My husband and I are both super dodgers. I work with the public at 2 jobs and am not particularly careful. I am vaccinated and boosted and have been around many friends and family that got it. There is a study for those of us that haven’t gotten it, y’all should check it out! https://www.covidhge.com/participants

  70. Jenny, you are a Covid Unicorn. A Covicorn. You skip through fields trailing stardust of gleeful superiority emenated by the fact that the rest of the world may have The Dread Disease but you, YOU are far and away too Manic Pixie Dream Girl to be bogged down or burdened or made to *shudder* sweat *sshhh!!* by anything so trivial and peasant-like as Covid. No no no, The Blogess deals only in superior diseases, diseases worthy of royalty, illnesses befitting those with discerning malady tastes! Like trich and stuff. 😖😋 Only the good stuff. The uncut, high-level stuff. You know what I’m saying. We pooh-pooh the trivialities of Covid, pooh-pooh! From upon the Malady Throne.

    Okay. I’ve probably taken this joke too far. (Sigh. Hi. Nice to meet you. I do that.)

    In other news, I just discovered your books and they made me feel much, much better about being me. Because being me is very hard and I am less alone because you are being you. And I like your blog.

    My name is Braha. Thank you for doing your thing. Sending big hugs and 4th grade style hand-fart noises. ❤❤❤❤🙌🙌🙌

  71. I quit my office job and now I am getting paid 120 Dollars hourly. How? I work over the internet! My old work was making me miserable,”io20 so I was forced to try-something different. 2 years later…I can say my life is changed completely for the better!
    Check it out what i do.. http://ritchwork24.blogspot.com

  72. I hot my first covid this week. My brain is borked
    I blame the day I said out loud last week: “no I have never had it .. yet lol!”

  73. Something awesome for me this week was finding something I lost two years ago while moving to a new state ( I lost my fancy brass wall hooks) while looking for a screwdriver. I found I different screwdriver. The screwdriver originally searched for is now missing. But it’s awesome to have a screwdriver and my hooks! It’s always awesome to find missing items.

  74. Good grief, I got a kick out of so many of your selections. I had to pick 1 it would be….
    The drugged owl….the woman with the ‘snake’ in the bathroom….the aquarium couple….the first word coming out of anesthesia…or

  75. My husband and I haven’t gotten COVID either (all vaxxed and always masked) but all my friends and family have gotten it, and are just as careful. Who knows… and I’m immunocompromised too! And BTW, your Subway joke was hilarious:)

  76. I made it until July of 2022 before it officially caught up to me when I went on vacation. This is the reason I never go on vacation. Although there is a chance I had it prior to that but did not get tested. I had some kind of something that had me all shitted up in either 2020 or 2021 but I didn’t get tested because it was way before the home tests and it took days to get an appointment to get tested and I was well after a few days. However it was very similar to what I felt like when I did test positive for it this year so it might have been. For some reason my fav of the videos was the people dancing while the dog was harassing the little kid. That and the cat with the toilet paper. Although really they were all hilarious. As was the Subway joke. 🙂

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