This is from my substack but I felt like it fit here too today. (Hint: You can totally lurk over there without subscribing if you want. Just say “no thanks” when it asks for your address and it’ll let you in to explore and see if you actually want to get weird emails from me once a week.)
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Someone asked me if I’d make a fast-motion video of me drawing but I can’t do that because I draw with my sketchbook up against my chest to protect it from Hunter S. Thomcat who wants to sit on it and Ferris Mewler who wants to chase the pen and Dorothy Barker who will inevitably jump on me right as I am focusing on the tiniest detail so instead I shot pictures every 15 minutes so I could make it into a video.
Then I tried to upload it to tiktok and did not do it right, and then I tried again and thought I did it right but Hailey called from college to assure me I did not do it right again, and then they and their partner walked me through each of the steps as I yelled “WHY DOES IT SAY GREENSCREEN IF THERE IS NO GREENSCREEN?” and they attempted to hide their laughter and sighs or frustration and pity, but then I finally did it (I think?) and I have no idea how.
(The video might be below, or maybe I’ve destroyed the internet. Either one is possible at this point.)
The whole mess is actually very similar to how I draw. Just trial and error. Working and reworking. Erasing more than I ever show. Often embarrassing myself publicly. Looking for inspiration to see how others do it and then criticising what I make because I’m always comparing it to people who have perfected the thing I’m chasing after.
To really like my work I have to look at it with different eyes. I have to forget everyone who did it better or faster, and remind myself that no one has ever done it quite the way I have. I have to remind myself that the people I compare myself to probably compare themselves to others and that if they let their self-doubt keep them from creating I’d never have been inspired by them. I have to remind myself that I do this for the love of creating, rather than the pursuit of perfection, because there is no way in hell I will ever get there. It’s the exact same with my writing.
I’m more than a quarter of the way through this year-old project of drawing every week and I don’t know that I’m getting any better at it yet. I’ve come to the conclusion that I will always struggle. But learning to enjoy that struggle issomething I’m getting better at, and I’m starting to realize how much this very thing is what life is all about.
Thank you for coming on this journey with me. Thank you for kind eyes.
Thank you for the struggle.
Hunter’s paw is the perfect touch to your video. Thank you so much for sharing.
Also, I know SO many people with the pronunciation thing. It isn’t just you.
Beautiful in so many ways. <3
When someone mispronounces something, I presume they learned it from reading instead of hearing it. 💖
Life is trial and error and learning from our mistakes.
Thank you for sharing your process as an artist.
The end result is beautiful because of the work you put into it and the results of that work.
I’ve always pronounced it your way until a family member corrected me to say that pee OH knee was the right way. Thank you for making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!! 🙂
Wait, it isn’t pee OH nee?? Dammit! Me too.
Love the part with the kitty foot.
“I have to remind myself that the people I compare myself to probably compare themselves to others and that if they let their self-doubt keep them from creating I’d never have been inspired by them.” This is one of the most profound things I have read in a long time.
How interesting!! Today I am wearing some warm socks I knit with a variegated pink yarn, the name of which colorway I had to look up, and which wasn’t in the databases I searched, so I had to dig up the ball band from the yarn from the depths of my Big Closet, and — you guessed it — the color is “Peony Pink.” Although, to be honest, it’s more like a lilac pink, but then I’ve never seen either a live lilac nor a live peony. But the socks are deliciously warm.
Hunter’s little paw is so perfect. My drawing is such crud. But sometimes I can breaks things down and paint them.
My daughter laughs at my technological frustration too. Ironically I used to be so ahead of the curve in terms of technology because of where I worked. I knew all the trends, all the lingo, everything. Now I’m not even wanting to TikTok. No thanks. Don’t need to TikTok today. I’ll stay here in Bag’s End, thank you very much.
I have yet to learn to enjoy the struggle.
In other words, I am struggling with it, and I haaate it.
See?
At least I can pretend I’m almost funny, but really I am not on the right path.
Thanks always Jenny for the healthy reminders.
It’s a wonderful drawing! Kudos.
*giggles* at the addition of a kitty paw. pets can be so helpful, in that adorable but NOT HELPING kind of way. my 60 pound dog often decides he’s a teeny tiny little lapdog. and whatever is currently on my lap needs to be moved out of the way FAST before he flops down on top of it and crushes it. I do like having a lap full of big cuddly dog! but I also like having a functional laptop, or not losing my crochet hook down between the couch cushions, or not having the library paperback bent out of shape.
Jenny this has inspired me to start drawing again – what kind of pen do you use?
(I use sakura sigma micron pens. I buy the assorted sizes but usually use 005 and 01. They’re about $2 each if you buy them in bulk. ~ Jenny)
It’s beautiful. Thanks for sharing!
Your drawings are beautiful & I loved watching the process! Regarding mispronounced words…I read Hermione from the Harry Potter books as “Her-ME-own” until the Goblet of Fire book.
💕💖💕
Beautiful message and flowers–thanks!
I know this isn’t the place I should be asking about this, but I can’t figure out any other way to be fairly sure you will see it. That being said:
Help! I’ve been trying to change my email address and it’s not working. I keep getting messages that I’ve already tried that (new) address and did not respond to the verification. I haven’t got no stinkin’ verifications! I’ve checked in spam, trash, promotions, inbox, but there’s never a stinkin’ verification!
I only want to subscribe to The Blogess, not the 84,617 other subscriptions they offer.
What am I doing wrong? I just want to subscribe with a new email address and close out that old email address.
Jenny, you are welcome to secretly think that I am a total dumbass. I know you are too kind to say it out loud. Besides, I think I’m a total dumbass about this.
Thank you ever so much!
Laura
(You are 100% not a dumbass and I wish I knew how to fix that. Have you checked your spam? Can you try another email and see if that works? Or maybe the verification is going to the old email address and you need to verify that to change it? ~ Jenny)
I somehow got to the ripe old age of 71 saying the word “contemplative” wrong all my life. I am so aggravated that I am contemplating never saying that word again. I apparently have never heard the word said correctly before.
This Gentle January I am slowly re-finding my muse and creativity. I needed this reminder about progress not perfection. Thanks.
At one of my first writing workshops, when I was reading my piece, I said reh-SPITE only to get some awkward but gentle feedback that it’s actually pronounced RESS-pit. Whenever I have a moment like that I think of the time Marge Simpson cried out “Run like the WINE-ed Lisa!” And when Lisa says “It’s pronounced WHIN-ed!” Marge replies “Well I didn’t know, I’ve only ever read it in books!” See? It’s just that we’ve all just read more books than we’ve had conversations with real people, and that’s totally normal and okay!
Also I really thought for a second that the post up there about making money for Google was honest satire from someone.
That is beautiful esp with the addition of Hunter’s paw!. I often pronounce words the British way and get looks…bah let them deal with it!! cheers.
I really needed this today. I’ve been trying to do acrylic pour paintings every day this month and it seems that everyone on the internet is amazing at it and make it look so easy and I just end up with mediocre mess most of the time. I have to remind my anxiety that art is supposed to be fun and unique and that my brain is a terrible a**hole of a critic. Thank you.
When I visit TikTok, there are two of this video there, so two of your attempts to post it must have worked, so you may be blaming yourself for one failed attempt that didn’t fail. The image size is smaller on the newer one, so if the last thing you did was make it smaller, the one before that worked too and you couldn’t tell. As for names, when I was in high school in the 1960s I was very isolated from popular youth culture and didn’t know anything about rock and roll or folk music. But my mom and I did buy sheet music books for her to play on the piano, so I knew there was a songwriter named Bob Dylan (pronounced, I assumed, DYE-lan), and at the same time I wondered who this guy named Bob Dillon was that everyone always talked about. This is doubly shameful because he named himself after Dylan Thomas and I should have AT LEAST known who THAT was and thus how Dylan was pronounced.
I love how you have strategically shaded some flowers, while leaving others clean. It adds a nice pop, while giving plenty of places for your eyes to rest. Lovely work!
I am now going to spend way too much time today thinking about which way I pronounce a flower I can’t even recognize!
Hi Jenny – thanks for this and all your other posts. Your TikTok video was an amazing – a great workaround. Most creative. Re: pronunciation – I’m Canadian but have a huge interest in LBJ. I’ve visited his ranch and read many biographies. I learned that Lady Bird was home schooled so that when she went to university (in Austin?) she told someone her favourite composer was ‘Beeth – oven’ because she’d only seen his name, not heard it.
(I love this. ~ Jenny)
In my head, I always pronounce it “pee-on-me”, and struggle to say it the correct way whenever I ever actually have to talk out loud about them….
I also will use “excrement” instead of “excellent”, because also funnier.
And have been known to say “Holy flying noodlefarts!!” which gives folks a reallllll serious pause to think about that imagery.
Jenn – I start Art Therapy tomorrow. I wish you could come with me.
“Comparison is the thief of Joy” is my favorite quote or whatever. Your art is absolutely original and lovely.
I love this so much. Like I want to buy it I love it that much. Do you sell your work?
(I never have, but maybe when I’m done with the year-long project I will. College is expensive. 🙂 ~ Jenny)
How many vowels can you fit into paeonia?
Pretty much most of them.
Good old plant names.
Tagetes, stachys, geum?
How about Metasequoia glyptostroboides?The handy thing about tackling latin names is there aren’t too many original Latins still around to correct you.
Naturally, my brain has just skipped to the Romanes eunt domus scene from Life of Brian.
(Note – in my extensive research for this comment I found that paeonia is of Greek origin and not Latin as could be implied.)
Beautiful! Your talents are boundless!
You’re awesome. When I feel down, I read your blog and it makes me feel better. Thank you for being you.
Absolutely gorgeous with a touch of humor. That’s you and your art! The process is a microscope and it can drive you to bad corners of your mind. I’m glad you’re taking the wheel.
I am so with you on the trial & error thing. So many times I shout “ah, I’ve done it” and Hubby will go “oh good, how did you do it?” and I’m like “uh, I went in there – I think and then, who knows? I think I clicked on ‘save’ at the end if that helps”
This is a fantastic piece for your Substack and completely fits here too! I especially love the honesty and vulnerability you share about your creative process.
This is from my Substack, but felt it resonated here too! (Lurk away without subscribing – just say “no thanks” at the address prompt!)
Ever try a fast-motion drawing video with a cat, a dog, and a mischievous rabbit as assistants? Spoiler: chaos (and a surprisingly decent video, maybe?). This piece explores the messy reality of creation – the trial, error, self-doubt, and ultimately, the joy of just doing it.
If you enjoy this, head over to my Substack for more weird musings and weekly art adventures!
This comment highlights the key points of your piece, adds a touch of humor, and invites readers to explore your Substack without feeling pressured.
Remember to replace “(The video might be below, or maybe I’ve destroyed the internet. Either one is possible at this point.)” with the actual video link if you haven’t already!
Khalid elarbi
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RayaaandSkina
مسلسل ريا وسكينة
This is a fantastic piece for your Substack and completely fits here too! I especially love the honesty and vulnerability you share about your creative process.
This is from my Substack, but felt it resonated here too! (Lurk away without subscribing – just say “no thanks” at the address prompt!)
Ever try a fast-motion drawing video with a cat, a dog, and a mischievous rabbit as assistants? Spoiler: chaos (and a surprisingly decent video, maybe?). This piece explores the messy reality of creation – the trial, error, self-doubt, and ultimately, the joy of just doing it.
If you enjoy this, head over to my Substack for more weird musings and weekly art adventures!
This comment highlights the key points of your piece, adds a touch of humor, and invites readers to explore your Substack without feeling pressured.
Remember to replace “(The video might be below, or maybe I’ve destroyed the internet. Either one is possible at this point.)” with the actual video link if you haven’t already!
khalidelarbi
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This is such a relatable post. I love how you’ve connected the experience of creating art with the ups and downs of life. It’s inspiring to see your dedication and willingness to embrace the struggle. Thank you for sharing your journey with us.
khalidelarbi
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