everything in the country wants to kill you

Texas is trying to kill us.

The last 24 hours have been weird and so I don’t have time to write a full post because I’m too busy building a basement to hide in so instead I’ll just share my tweets from last night: Not sure if that was a mountain lion or an enormous yellow lab chasing that deer butContinue reading “Texas is trying to kill us.”

UPDATED: The post where I make it up to you. And then make things worse. And then apologize again.

Yesterday I went out to the nearby market because we live in rural Texas so we go to all the various country fairs and trade days because that’s what we have instead of a mall. They are awesome and terrible and I never come home without part of an iron lung, or a 60 yearContinue reading “UPDATED: The post where I make it up to you. And then make things worse. And then apologize again.”

There’s a guy in my attic trying to fish out the dead squirrel that got stuck in my wall. Time to appreciate your jobs, people.

Last week the pest control guy was at my house trying to get a dead squirrel out of my wall and I didn’t have the greatest confidence in the guy to begin with because when I called the week before to complain that something very large was hurling itself at my bedroom wall the pestContinue reading “There’s a guy in my attic trying to fish out the dead squirrel that got stuck in my wall. Time to appreciate your jobs, people.”

Well that just seems excessive

Remember how one of the great advantages of me moving to the Hill Country was that I wouldn’t have to deal with hurricanes anymore? Me too. Oh, hubris. So a tree just fell on my house. Luckily it’s the thickness of half-dollar so it didn’t do much except to just scare the shit out ofContinue reading “Well that just seems excessive”

I AM INAPPROPRIATELY EXCITED ABOUT THIS.

Holy shit, y’all. I just looked up and there was a fox in our yard. A fucking fox. I know this is no biggie to most people but it kind of blows my mind that we live so far out in the country that there are actual foxen that live in our hills. Also, spellcheckContinue reading “I AM INAPPROPRIATELY EXCITED ABOUT THIS.”