If it’s Tuesday this must be Houston

April 24, 2012

in Random crap

I’m still on tour and I’m in Houston today so come see me if you can!  (Tour details are right here.)  If not, you can just read the continuing chronicles of my best of series.  This post was from 2011…

Remember last week when I wrote about the sign I’d put up on my neighborhood bulletin board?

This one:

Well, I checked today to see if anyone else had responded to it, but IT WAS GONE. It had been taken down, presumably by someone who hates snake reunions and happy endings. It was disconcerting.

Luckily, I knew the perfect place to ask for help:

 

UPDATED: The missing sign lasted less than 24 hours before vanishing. It’s a losing battle, but it’s a losing battle I’m willing to fight. Mainly because I work from home and have an entire ream of copy paper at my disposal. I can do this all damn day, vandals.

{ 157 comments… read them below or add one }

1 tolly April 24, 2012 at 6:22 am

Still Funny!! People at home with reams of paper can have adventures too!

2 Amanda April 24, 2012 at 6:23 am

OMG! That is funny. I have been reading your bloggs all morning! Love them…Started my day off just right. Read ” pick your battles” to my husband this morning….he cracked up laughing. :) Thanks

3 karla April 24, 2012 at 6:23 am

you are my hero :)

4 Auntiem April 24, 2012 at 6:24 am

This is the post that made me become a faithful blogstalker! It still makes me laugh everytime I read it!
Auntiem recently posted..Hunger gamesMy Profile

5 Amanda April 24, 2012 at 6:24 am

“gives hugs with mouth” *snort
Amanda recently posted..Update…My Profile

6 Shreya April 24, 2012 at 6:29 am

A sign within a sign within a sign…and we thought Inception was new! You clearly got there before. LOVE YOU.
Shreya recently posted..Twist of FateMy Profile

7 Serena April 24, 2012 at 6:32 am

Girl you make my mornings! Keep on keepin’ on!

8 Andreas Heinakroon April 24, 2012 at 6:37 am

I laughed and laughed at the original post, still very funny!
Andreas Heinakroon recently posted..A matter of timeMy Profile

9 Nicky April 24, 2012 at 6:37 am

Ha! Love it. I hope to have such adventures in printing.
Nicky recently posted..HamsasMy Profile

10 dgm April 24, 2012 at 6:38 am

It’s a veritable Escher tessellation, only way funnier. Thanks for the morning snort. (Of laughter.)

11 weezafish April 24, 2012 at 6:38 am

You inspire me. To leave random but amusing LOST signs around my neighbourhood. Is that a bad thing?
weezafish recently posted..Happy Birthday Natey!My Profile

12 Ryan C. Robert April 24, 2012 at 6:38 am

Hands down one of the funniest things ever. I’m surprised those signs aren’t floating around tumblr.
Ryan C. Robert recently posted..Steak Fajitas for people that don’t know how to make Steak FajitasMy Profile

13 Kathy April 24, 2012 at 6:39 am

“Gives hugs with mouth.” Bloody and funny.
Kathy recently posted..Wanted: SWF With Tech Support SkillsMy Profile

14 Bozo April 24, 2012 at 6:40 am

Lol, you’ll win in the end… such determination can’t be broken!
Bozo recently posted..Town MapMy Profile

15 Jenn April 24, 2012 at 6:40 am

Heh, one of my very favorite posts of yours. Did you ever find Snakey’s family… or the stolen sign? I am deeply concerned for both. LOL!

16 Kara April 24, 2012 at 6:40 am

I loved this post. Bitey snakes… heehee. Now you’ll have to excuse me as I need to go to Barnes & Noble to buy this Audiobook that I’ve been looking for – Let’s Pretend this Never Happened. I hear it’s got some funny outtakes. Maybe you’ve heard of it? :)
Kara recently posted..Funkalicious Modern Patio ChairsMy Profile

17 alaina April 24, 2012 at 6:41 am

The best part “this is why its important to put collars on all of your pets”. A snake with a collar, awesome.
alaina recently posted..Four-Legged Love.My Profile

18 Kathleen April 24, 2012 at 6:42 am

So much fun. And I hope you are having so much fun on your whirl around Texas! They must love, love, love you there, home girl!
Kathleen recently posted..External ValidationMy Profile

19 Amy April 24, 2012 at 6:42 am

Oh, Jenny, this still makes me laugh! I’m waiting for your book…………Amazon says it was delivered last night, but it wasn’t. But then their website says sometimes the delivery people mark it as delivered even when they really didn’t (WTF??). My husband is promising to stalk them until it comes so I can concentrate on studying for finals–I really think he’s promising it just to keep me quiet because all these exams are pushing me a little over the edge (because I am the insane kind of woman who goes back to school at 40+)……….it has to get here because the way I am going to celebrate the end of finals is that Thursday I am going to bundle all of my kids off to school and go back to bed with your book. (And definitely some chocolate………..and maybe a drink……………..) Ok, more studying now!

20 Rob R April 24, 2012 at 6:42 am

Couid you just sprinkle some of your DNA from a crop duster every now and then? The world would be a much happier place.
Rob R recently posted..Getting Out of Our Comfort ZoneMy Profile

21 Tami April 24, 2012 at 6:43 am

omg….this still makes me laugh. I wonder if that snake was ever claimed.

22 Lisa | Mama.ie April 24, 2012 at 6:49 am

This post, and the giant metal chicken post are definitely my favourites! :)
Lisa | Mama.ie recently posted..Food for the ducksMy Profile

23 Stacy April 24, 2012 at 6:50 am

Love this from way back when! It reminded me of David Thorne when I first read it and I know we both love HIM! Happy Trails on your book tour!
Stacy recently posted..Spring has Sprung CupcakesMy Profile

24 Eric April 24, 2012 at 6:52 am

You said “ream”

25 Mayor Gia April 24, 2012 at 6:55 am
26 Queen of All Things Good April 24, 2012 at 6:56 am

You know, and here I sit at home with REAMS of paper…. my neighbors will not thank you for this. But my sense of humor will!!
Queen of All Things Good recently posted..Why I Love the InternetMy Profile

27 Diane April 24, 2012 at 6:57 am

Good morning, Jenny! I finished the book last night! What. A. Blast! Remember (sure you do…) that I said I used to be crazy and that you would be fine? Well… turns out you already are! Yeah.. I know. Great news, huh?

I am absolutely in love with your willingness to be yourself. (“I’m not like anyone.” **sniffle** I think a few of us are kind of also in love with Victor. What a wonderful man and worthy sparring partner….)

Okay.. you MUST let us know if any of your former friends/neighbors/acquaintances/snobby toddlers on a diet moms show up for your book signing. Shoe’s on the other foot now, huh? (Okay, I don’t even know if they’re wearing shoes but I’m sure you get the picture….) **fucking amateurs**

God bless Barnaby Jones Pickles. My condolences.

I less than three you. <3

28 Brenna April 24, 2012 at 7:01 am

I wish I had half your creativity. Who thinks up this kind of stuff other than you?
Brenna recently posted..The one where I eat some crowMy Profile

29 NewMommyConfessions (@NewMommyConfess) April 24, 2012 at 7:03 am

This is one of my favorite stories. You’re very, very funny without even trying. And I am very, very jealous. I’m going to go make some signs now…Or not… They’d get stolen anyway, right? And who has the money for that?
NewMommyConfessions (@NewMommyConfess) recently posted..I’m a Terrible Mother!My Profile

30 Angeerah April 24, 2012 at 7:04 am

I would love for you to be my neighbor. That would be the awesomest. And are you heading up north? I’ve noticed you are only going to warm states for your book tour which really is genius but still, we rust belters are people too…who want to have you sign our book…and stuff.

Damn I sound like a stalker. Really I’m not.

31 Cindy Reed April 24, 2012 at 7:04 am

I think this was the first blog post of yours I ever read. Naturally, I’ve become a fanatic because of it. :)
Cindy Reed recently posted..The Mommy Wars Hunger Games.My Profile

32 Jen April 24, 2012 at 7:04 am

I too have reams of paper and live in the desert….Oh the possibilities. My husband will not like this idea, but one must have a little fun.
Jen recently posted..Rebekah Grace- Now available in ebook format!My Profile

33 Anonymous April 24, 2012 at 7:05 am

PLEASE, PLEASE, PRETTY PLEASE do another signing in Houston. I want to come but I can’t today :(

34 Renee April 24, 2012 at 7:06 am

love your blog. love your book! my husband had to keep shushhing me last night because my laughing was evidently disturbing his ability to watch Diners Drive-Ins and Dives.. go figure.

35 Monica DeLaCruz April 24, 2012 at 7:07 am

funny again the second time around. and you were AWESOME last night in san antonio. we love you jenny!!! :o ) and sorry for being a bumbling idiot. i was a little starstruck.
Monica DeLaCruz recently posted..The Genius Book of World Records (because it’s that good)My Profile

36 Rebeccah April 24, 2012 at 7:08 am

That one just never gets old. I think I read it like 10 times when it was up the first time. ALL DAMN DAY VANDALS!
Rebeccah recently posted..I’m A Nosy Neighbor. But It’s Cool.My Profile

37 Allyn April 24, 2012 at 7:11 am

Your neighbors are the best.
Do they give hugs with mouth?
Allyn recently posted..Weekend Update: Saturday MorningMy Profile

38 E M Foster April 24, 2012 at 7:12 am

I wish I had half your creativity!! I’d be published by now instead of trying to get my brain to focus on one project at a time. I soooo have writer’s ADD!! :-D

39 Tumbleweed April 24, 2012 at 7:12 am

The world needs you.
Tumbleweed recently posted..What Grizzly Adams Can Teach Us About Public UrinationMy Profile

40 Rebecca April 24, 2012 at 7:14 am

I am only 5 chapters into your book and love, loVE, LOVE IT! My Grandparents and two aunts lived on farms in Ohio and for whatever reason my parents always thought it would a good idea for us, my sister and I, to spend weeks with them during the summer. So, I guess what I’m implying is I can relate to some of your childhood. But other than being forced to do my cousins chores, milking a few goats, playing with the barn cats, building hay forts and riding around on a three-wheeler… I got nothing. But your book is wonderful! Thank you for sharing your life and for continuing to do so! Have fun on the rest of your book tour!

41 Sarah April 24, 2012 at 7:15 am

I still love this post. It makes me wish we had neighborhood bulletin board. I would put one up myself, except where I live, the sign where you post signs would go missing…
Sarah recently posted..Honestly, It DOES Need a New Name…My Profile

42 Corinne April 24, 2012 at 7:23 am

Still awesome!!! See you Wednesday!!!!

43 ChrisinNY April 24, 2012 at 7:25 am

I bought your book for me, me, me (almost all the other books I buy are for others). My daughter tried to steal it from me to read, just like the last two Harry Potter books, but I hid it and outwaited her as she had to go back to college. heh, heh, heh. Mom FTW.

44 Keaven Neely April 24, 2012 at 7:26 am

SO, you’re book came in the mail yesterday and it couldn’t have showed up at a more perfect time. I LOST it yesterday… not that I ever truly had IT, whatever IT is, but I lost it. I think I cried for a few hours straight and ended up throwing up from making myself so sick. And then my husband came home with a package in hand for me. It was your book! FINALLY! A bit of sunlight on a dark stormy day. I already added my bookplate to it… but it’s not quite the same as if I could come meet you on your book tour. Sadly, you’re coming no where near me. Seriously… Nashville is like a central location… I can drive to so many places in just 4 or 5 hours… St. Louis, Atlanta… Please consider adding another stop to your book tour so I can meet you. ;)

45 Marie April 24, 2012 at 7:28 am

I’m taking inspiration from this for Boycott Tuesday.
<3

46 Cathy April 24, 2012 at 7:28 am

LOL!!! This is priceless! So glad I found your blog!

47 Suniverse April 24, 2012 at 7:31 am

I’m willing to set up surveillance to keep watch on the sign. Mostly because I am a believer in justice, but partly because it’s Tuesday and really? I’m already over this week.
Suniverse recently posted..Ugh. Spring gives me stress.My Profile

48 Sweety Darlin' April 24, 2012 at 7:34 am

I hate that people are not supportive of the reunification of families.
Sweety Darlin’ recently posted..Then she hit him in the DING DING!My Profile

49 Nikki April 24, 2012 at 7:36 am

See you today

50 beans April 24, 2012 at 7:47 am

i love how it says “he doesn’t answer to anything, he’s very angry”. i lost it reading that!

51 dumb{squared} April 24, 2012 at 7:51 am

You’re very good at trying to reunite people/animals/inanimate objects. You should moonlight as a reunioner or reunioneress. Whatevs. By the way, can you please try to reunite me with my self-esteem? I lost it somewhere at the gas station when I ripped my pants (at the crotch) and children in minivans laughed. Please.

Avoid the Best Western on Dallas Street. It may be haunted. With ghosts without a sense of humor.
dumb{squared} recently posted..Somewhere in the world, my doppelgänger just exploded into confettiMy Profile

52 Cat @ Breakfast to Bed April 24, 2012 at 7:55 am

The snake obviously likes where he/she is and doesn’t want fucked with.
Cat @ Breakfast to Bed recently posted..Finding Sasquatch in a Pair of Well-Fitting Jeans.My Profile

53 Lori April 24, 2012 at 7:56 am

Still funny love it very much! I wish I was closer I would have loved to be all fan girl, and sneak you wine slushies, cause that is the kind of fan girl I am.
Lori recently posted..Zombie Kittens, the Plague, and angels in cottonwood.My Profile

54 Robert K. Blechman April 24, 2012 at 8:03 am

Thank you for your kind comments about my laught-out-loud Twitter novel, Executive Severance, in NY last Tuesday! I am posting Chapter 1 on Twitter at 11AM EDT today. Please buy the complete Twitter novel at Amazon. http://amzn.to/zkkuFU
Robert K. Blechman recently posted..I Baked a Cake!My Profile

55 Kristin April 24, 2012 at 8:10 am

I will be there tonight! Will you sign my Beyonce? ;)

56 Allison April 24, 2012 at 8:10 am

Aw, fun memories! I loved seeing this post progress.
Allison recently posted..How to Make a Get Well/Birthday/Fun CardMy Profile

57 Corey Feldman April 24, 2012 at 8:11 am

Its like one of those mirrors images in mirror images.
Corey Feldman recently posted..Egret wakes up earlyMy Profile

58 L-Diggitty April 24, 2012 at 8:12 am

I have to confess – I’m the one who’s been stealing your sign. But I’m making a scrapbook! You’ll love it.
L-Diggitty recently posted..and… i feel officially oldMy Profile

59 Theresa April 24, 2012 at 8:13 am

BWHAHAHAHAHAHA

60 Vailey Girl April 24, 2012 at 8:15 am

I finished your book, and got time off to come see you in Miami-ish! I also ordered a Copernicus shirt and wrote on the back “I <3 the Bloggess" YAY! I hope your marker has enough ink! : )

61 Jillian April 24, 2012 at 8:16 am

I’m really sad because Tiberios would be an excellent name for a snake.
Jillian recently posted..Still Working On That Whole “Funny” ThingMy Profile

62 nat April 24, 2012 at 8:23 am

I loved the lost snake post! Thank you very much for the ‘best of’, they’re making me chuckle all over again.
nat recently posted..In which Old Friends are Encountered and everyone RejoicesMy Profile

63 Jennifer April 24, 2012 at 8:31 am

This might be one of my very favorites and after the uber-$hitty day I am having, I really, really needed this smile. Thank you!

64 Stephanie April 24, 2012 at 8:33 am

Let me know if you run out of paper. I’d be happy to send you more!
Stephanie recently posted..Cinco de Mayo Countdown – Part OneMy Profile

65 Anon April 24, 2012 at 8:33 am

I’m driving 2 hrs to the signing today because this shiz is funny and, you know, my town doesn’t have any cool indie bookstores like Blue Willow that do this kind of thing.

66 Kayla April 24, 2012 at 8:39 am

classic.
Kayla recently posted..Bok Choy and Curry Shrimp: Wal-lahMy Profile

67 danielle April 24, 2012 at 8:41 am

I love that you are going back through these… Reminders of why we all fell in love with you.
danielle recently posted..The Yellow Shirt.My Profile

68 demenshea April 24, 2012 at 8:43 am

It’s the little battles that are so rewarding!

69 Maria April 24, 2012 at 8:50 am

Hilarious! I am definitely following you. I mean your blog. Not in a stalkerish way.

70 Amanda B April 24, 2012 at 8:50 am

Your book came in the mail the other day. I love it but I can only read a few pages at a time because I can’t breath for laughing. Turns out it’s not great bed time reading. On a tangent I also had a raccoon. He often poured everything down the bathroom drain and hid in cabinets. You might walk into the kitchen only to have the silverware drawer slide out and see his little face peaking up at you. Thanks for the book and the laughter.

71 Robin April 24, 2012 at 8:57 am

Funny every time! I snorted… again! Thanks!
Robin recently posted..Shoesday. Get it? Because it rhymes.My Profile

72 Ms. Plaid Dressy Pants April 24, 2012 at 9:13 am

This is still, by far, my most favorite post.
Ms. Plaid Dressy Pants recently posted..I might murder someone at WalmartMy Profile

73 Keely April 24, 2012 at 9:19 am

I love this! “Hugs with Mouth”….bwhahaha!

74 Pish Posh April 24, 2012 at 9:31 am

I do not want to know the tight-ass that is taking down these super-helpful posters of yours.

They sound like a real party of rotten potatoes.
Pish Posh recently posted..T is for TanzaniaMy Profile

75 Kim April 24, 2012 at 9:31 am

May have come from a bad home…. Still funny as hell!
xoxox
Kim

76 Andrea Mulder-Slater April 24, 2012 at 9:31 am

Terrific. Can’t wait to see what happens next ;)
Andrea Mulder-Slater recently posted..Anxiety wrapped up in a big ball of awesomeMy Profile

77 Shelly April 24, 2012 at 9:33 am

Was reading your book on an airplane yesterday. Pretty sure the TSA was alerted that an unstable person was on the plane and to have security ready when we landed. Was cracking up. Same thing happened at the hotel bar where I continued reading although the bar tender and waitresses are now all ordering your book after I read a few excerpts to them. Do I get a commission??

78 Christene April 24, 2012 at 9:36 am

I am honestly not sure which part of this is the most hilarious. This is why I love you!
Christene recently posted..40 Weeks of Pregnancy – Week 4My Profile

79 Julie April 24, 2012 at 10:27 am

I still love this one, it gets me every time. You’re a genius.

80 Michael Wakely April 24, 2012 at 10:30 am

You make me laugh, and that’s a special gift! Thank you. :)

81 sean April 24, 2012 at 10:35 am

you are so wonderfully broken. thanks just for being yourself, honest, it’s like a gift to us other truly screwed up human beings. like a club. i mean as much as an emergency ward is a club i guess, but a club nonetheless. hey check that out, i got to use “nonetheless” in a sentence. I’m going to try another one:

heretofore

Ahhhhhhh. that was nice.
sean recently posted..The Least Of TheseMy Profile

82 MoabLynette April 24, 2012 at 10:38 am

Tee Hee — I actually went looking through your blog archives for this post after reading the chapter in your book “Hairless Rats: Free for Kids Only” — it’s classic. Love the book – love you – xoxo

83 Diana April 24, 2012 at 10:41 am

I have never commented before but Im so glad you shared this post. I forgot about it and remembered I laughed so hard the first time, and after reading it again I laughed so hard. I’ve already read it several times over again in the last 30 minutes just so I can laugh some more. It’s just one of those posts that is so funny to me and will get me laughing every time. Thanks and write more posts just like this! Haha. I’m going tomorrow to Barnes and noble to buy your book. Very excited.

84 Elise Kacal April 24, 2012 at 10:47 am

A friend and I are coming to the signing tonight. So flippin excited about it!!

85 Jizzbanger April 24, 2012 at 10:55 am

This is, hands down, one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. For realz.

86 The Pear Lady April 24, 2012 at 11:00 am

Now, I feel like posting some signs up just because….hehe.
There’s no place like home, eh. :D

87 Tina April 24, 2012 at 11:07 am

This is my # 2 favorite post, my favorite of course is also about snakes but might involve a deathmatch of some kind.
<3

88 Amie aka @mammaLoves April 24, 2012 at 11:07 am

You know you’re my hero, right? You do the things I only wish I would do. Please tell that stupid voice inside my head to shut up and just have fun.

89 Hannah April 24, 2012 at 11:08 am

I’d forgotten about this post. It just re-made my day all over again.

90 red April 24, 2012 at 11:17 am

I remember when this one came up! I’m laughing out loud…again!
Still loving your book.
Ready to drive from Delaware to Houston for an autograph.

…also, your book smells good.
red recently posted..The Movie Whore and “Elizabeth” part II…or really, Part IMy Profile

91 EG April 24, 2012 at 11:40 am

This pretty much just made my day.
EG recently posted..Be NiceMy Profile

92 Yancie April 24, 2012 at 11:40 am

I will be there tonight. But won’t get to meet you. See the bookstore is requiring purchase of your book from their store. I smartly pre-ordered mine and have it already, with signed bookplate.

My problem is my husband is being such a “Victor” and won’t let me buy a second copy of the same book with the same signature in it. I even told him a weasel could sign in your place. Still a no-go.

93 Caryn April 24, 2012 at 11:41 am

Hahaha. I always loved this post and it is still funny. Do you sell t-shirts that say ‘Not missing? Irony.’ because you should.
Caryn recently posted..The More Things ChangeMy Profile

94 JENN April 24, 2012 at 11:43 am

I’m pretty sure Wil Wheaton took your sign….Did you get a look at him collating…yeah…I’m sure he took it! Wil Wheaton is crafty!
JENN recently posted..California Dreamin’ – Bjorn Sees Dead People – The Catholic L.A. EditionMy Profile

95 Brandi April 24, 2012 at 11:47 am

hahahaha. This is too much! I’m excited to see how far this sign posting goes!
Brandi recently posted..Finally, a Thunder sighting!My Profile

96 Shelley April 24, 2012 at 11:54 am

I love “bitey!”
Shelley recently posted..WelcomeMy Profile

97 Tom Stronach April 24, 2012 at 12:24 pm

I think Will Wheaton is secretly stealingthe signs to collate!
Tom Stronach recently posted..Another Reason Why I hate British Gas /Centrica (swear alert)My Profile

98 Coreena April 24, 2012 at 12:33 pm

I nearly peed from laughing. <3 <3 <3
Coreena recently posted..What would you like to stop doing? – Burning QuestionMy Profile

99 Kaitlyn April 24, 2012 at 12:40 pm

I am laughing. Out loud. Properly. None of this LOLing business.
Awesome.
Kaitlyn recently posted..Get it togetherMy Profile

100 Holly from 300 Pounds Down April 24, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Oh this is awesome!!
Holly from 300 Pounds Down recently posted..The DreamMy Profile

101 Kerry April 24, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Can’t wait to meet you in Austin tomorrow night! I’m dragging my mother along (since she has a growing collection of metal yard art bought-on-the-side-of-I35 in her front yard in the Texas Hill Country {two large metal palm trees, one to-scale armadillo, a large state of TX emblem attached to the front of their house, and one 3′ wall-hung gecko). Mom does not yet understand the significance of attending your book signing, but I haven’t shown her your post for Beyonce yet, either. My Mom also collects mouse skulls.
Thank you for your book! I plan to read excerpts at the dinner table while visiting the folks this weekend and replace all cuss words with ‘fudge’ and ‘sugar’.

102 Jen in Portlandia April 24, 2012 at 1:06 pm

I had to post a similar missive when someone absconded my Malcolm Reynolds action figure from my desk last week. My Jayne and Wash figures were not amused.
Jen in Portlandia recently posted..Dining For DouchebagsMy Profile

103 Jemé April 24, 2012 at 1:09 pm

This is the funniest thing I have ever read. Hope your book tour is going well. Thank you for making me laugh.

104 Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom April 24, 2012 at 1:10 pm

That is THE best! LOL PS…the rattlesnake ate the sign…

105 Morgan Eckstein April 24, 2012 at 1:38 pm

This still cracks me up.
Morgan Eckstein recently posted..Vault as an example of extended GD color scalesMy Profile

106 sky April 24, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Still the funniest thing you’ve written. Except Beyonce. Except Juanita. Except Will Wheaton. Except Copernicus. Except everything you’ve written.

107 Susan McG April 24, 2012 at 1:56 pm

I’m glad there was no snake picture today ’cause that monkey picture gave me nightmares last night.

108 Melanie April 24, 2012 at 2:03 pm

MISSING: SEVERAL SMALL MICE. . .
Melanie recently posted..Real Food for a Busy Hungry GirlMy Profile

109 Jen April 24, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Hah, “does he answer to Tiberius”
Jen recently posted..Liebster Blog!My Profile

110 jacky April 24, 2012 at 2:58 pm

i almost choked on my cofffee.
jacky recently posted..Heal Heal, butt of a frog…My Profile

111 IronB April 24, 2012 at 3:04 pm

I hope you read this even though you’re on your big book tour. You no longer have the deadest live cat in the world:
http://whatshouldwecallme.tumblr.com/post/21358415223/waking-up-for-work-hungover

112 Heather April 24, 2012 at 3:05 pm

appears the tour is going well – lots of pens, lots of fans, lots of weirdness, good good good.

I got my copy of “Let’s Pretend…” last week – so excited!!! :-D
Only sad thing was – no bookplate?! My husband got it for me – he pre-ordered as instructed from a link on this site, but still no signed bookplate :-( (((( Your book tour is tooooo far away for us to come for an in-person sig ……… sigh. What would Beyonce do? Oh and we’ve found her long lost distant PA cousin – and yes, that is the way in which the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania refers to itself! P-f’n-A. Knock-knock…..

113 Swedishskier April 24, 2012 at 3:19 pm

Denver’s a nice city you know. Bring oxygen. And Juanita.
Swedishskier recently posted..Day 21My Profile

114 Kate April 24, 2012 at 3:35 pm

I just wanted to say that this post has made my kinda terrible day better.
Kate recently posted..(My) Life is Like ThisMy Profile

115 Gary April 24, 2012 at 3:56 pm

That was just as funny as the first time I read it. If I lived in your neighborhood I would check the bulletin board every day

116 Expat-Mom (Sarah) April 24, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Somebody was probably really pissed that your orphan snake ate their missing cat.
Expat-Mom (Sarah) recently posted..The mind of Expat-Mom… Things go full-circle, I promise. Not like crazy coo-coo circles, just like Lion King circles.My Profile

117 Leila (Don't Speak Whinese) April 24, 2012 at 4:20 pm

I now need to make a neighborhood bulletin board just to mess with my neighbors even more.
Leila (Don’t Speak Whinese) recently posted..Don’t Miss Out On Reliving Childhood With Your ChildrenMy Profile

118 Valerie April 24, 2012 at 5:04 pm

This is just too awesome for words…

I once got lost and hugged people with my mouth… I ended up arrested. That snake was lucky.
Valerie recently posted..Let me tell you a story about a little girl…My Profile

119 Melissa April 24, 2012 at 5:29 pm

It’s no wonder a lost snake would be so bitey. The injustice of it all!
Melissa recently posted..Memories from summer camp: Dodgeball, peanut butter, and bodily fluidsMy Profile

120 Vicky April 24, 2012 at 6:06 pm

This is one of my favs! thanks for reposting

121 hogsatemysister April 24, 2012 at 6:09 pm

We suspect the missing snake and missing-missing signs are at the Sweetwater Rattlesnake Roundup.

Where mouth-to-fang rescusitation and chicken fried rattler are common.
hogsatemysister recently posted..Happy 1st Birthday Crack Puppy!My Profile

122 Carrie April 24, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Damn, that’s as funny as it was the first time!!

And just so you don’t forget…TOMORROW IS AUSTIN. Yes, you’re in Austin.

And I’m gonna be in line. With my crazy ass friend who is probably gonna have a damn cat on her head or something.

But I’M THERE. Actually…I could be in line now. Uh, huh. You just never know.
Carrie recently posted..You’d think I had solved a world issue or two by the way I talk about being so busy.My Profile

123 Kathy April 24, 2012 at 6:27 pm

“Gives hugs with mouth.” I’ll be laughing the rest of the night. Now I wish our neighborhood had a bulletin board.

124 pinkscript April 24, 2012 at 6:45 pm

Haha, sending a mouth-hug your way!

125 Squisha April 24, 2012 at 7:03 pm

I call hoax on the whole thing.

When do you ever see a bulletin board posted with a series of notes that all contain proper spelling and punctuation?

126 Trudy April 24, 2012 at 7:05 pm

I am reading your book and it fucking rocks. Thanks.

127 Dr. Briana April 24, 2012 at 7:43 pm

You are fucking stupid funny. No really, I don’t mean stupid, but you are funny. I cannot deal with it!!! Love you! XOXO
Dr. Briana recently posted..loving my friendsMy Profile

128 Elizabeth April 24, 2012 at 8:15 pm

I just started your book yesterday because I was about knee deep in a series and couldn’t find my way to pause it.

I have laughed so hard I have hurt! I have shared your Rambo soap story with countless people and they have since gone out immediately thereafter and bought your book for themselves.

I just read, “It’s just that…Have you ever been homesick for someplace that doesn’t exist anymore? Someplace that exists only in your mind?” I lost it. It’s happened to my tiny hometown too. I didn’t know how to word it. Thank you for giving words to my emptiness. It’s a sad thing, not being able to show your child where you grew up because it’s doesn’t exist anymore.

129 Cactus Sally April 24, 2012 at 8:16 pm

You probably already know – but in case you don’t – The San Antonio Express Newspaper describes your writing voice as “part Lucille Ball and part Hunter S. Thompson” in this article http://www.mysanantonio.com/life/article/A-life-less-ordinary-turns-into-a-page-turner-for-3498369.php#page-1

Congrats on your well deserved and hard earned success.

130 Caiti April 24, 2012 at 8:19 pm

Jenny! I am a huge fan, and have never commented before. But I must say I have read your entire blog, multiple times, as well as your book now, which I completely loved. Never ever stop, please? Your insanity compared to my insanity, while apples to oranges (or whatever the hell that means), at least makes me feel like my life isn’t completely a farce. Thank you for putting yourself out there. I’m honestly too exhausted from raising children and dealing with chronic pain to write (and I’m not a writer either, makes a big difference, not everyone can be a blogger), so yeah. I rambled. I’m sorry. Thanks again for the smiles.

131 Sea Cat April 24, 2012 at 9:43 pm

OMG…… My pre ordered book was delivered today! I’m so excited! Can’t wait for a few days off work so I can read it. I think this is the most excited I’ve ever been in my life to receive a book. Is that funny… or sad? I say its just wonderful!
Love you, love your blog, can’t imagine not loving the book. Wish you were coming to Greenville, SC so I could have you sign my copy!

132 fabulousmissb April 24, 2012 at 11:35 pm

I just had to show you this. It seems like it would be right up your alley. Can’t wait for your book to get here!

http://devour.com/video/mattstache/

133 Karen Sanders April 24, 2012 at 11:47 pm

Ahh, yes….one of the best of last year. Carry on.
Karen Sanders recently posted..P, Q, R, S – People Quickly Respond with ShitMy Profile

134 Martha Staton April 25, 2012 at 12:48 am

I hope to win a copy of your book. I would enjoy being inspired. Thank you, Martha Staton

135 April April 25, 2012 at 2:30 am

Oh my gosh…I seriously just got through bent over laughing/crying for the past 3 minutes. This is the first time I’ve visited your blog, and was the first post I read. Love it!! :-)

136 rowenablue April 25, 2012 at 2:59 am

Loved meeting you tonight. You are even more awesome in person. Despite what you said, you’re not just funny in writing.

137 Amanda Taylor April 25, 2012 at 4:58 am

I recently found your blog. Where have I been? Funniest-blog-EVER!

138 Allie April 25, 2012 at 6:12 am

I just heard of you. Now. Here in Houston. So sad! Free snakes……

139 Vanessa April 25, 2012 at 8:48 am

So glad to meet the woman behind the blog! It was like in Wizard of Oz when they see what’s behind the curtain except you were totally nice and sweet and I just want to say thanks for doing what you do because you are inspiring!! Yours was the first book signing I’ve ever gone to and it was great to see you, Juanita and Copernicus!

140 Erin April 25, 2012 at 11:40 am

I didn’t know you back then. So I’m glad you reposted. Good, good stuff, Bloggess.
Erin recently posted..Reading list-In-ProgressMy Profile

141 ros April 25, 2012 at 4:49 pm

posterception!!!
also, mouth-hugs. that’s hot.

142 Valorie April 25, 2012 at 7:17 pm

This is absolutely my favorite old post of yours! Hope you’re still enjoying your tour. :)
Valorie recently posted..how-to: be a twenty-something.My Profile

143 Sara April 25, 2012 at 10:44 pm

Possibly one of my favorite posts ever

144 Jennifer April 25, 2012 at 11:54 pm

You complete me.

145 melodie April 26, 2012 at 8:01 am

Is it just me or this is really hilarious?
melodie recently posted..Indoor chaise lounge chairsMy Profile

146 Mary April 26, 2012 at 1:13 pm

Not only is the post HILARIOUS, but I love the title. A reference to one of my favorite movies of all time. Thank you for validating me.

147 Jill April 26, 2012 at 2:31 pm

The first time I read this, I laughed ’til I cried. This time, I laughed until I snorted and the entire office wanted to know what I was doing. Thanks. Thanks a lot for ruining a perfectly good afternoon of pretending to work.
Jill recently posted..Migraine, Day 2.5My Profile

148 Diana Fisler April 26, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Re: rattlesnakes and taxidermy animals, I feel you need to know this:
http://www.gizmag.com/robosquirrel-rattlesnakes-squirrels/22065/

149 Tanya Mount April 26, 2012 at 6:48 pm

I haven’t laughed to the point of tears in a very long time, and I’ve done it twice since I was introduced to your blog. This particular made my family think I had lost my mind! Thank you!!

150 JP April 26, 2012 at 7:02 pm

This literally made me laugh forever. You are amazing.

151 Amber Harrison April 27, 2012 at 10:20 am

Initially I thought I was suffering from de-j-vu, then I wondered if I was having another precognitive episode but a quick google showed that you’d posted this thread before on 4th October 2011.
Now I feel cheated out of a superpower :(

152 DarthMama April 27, 2012 at 10:53 am

Still love this one, and I still think that’s my brother’s handwriting on the “that’s why it’s important to put collars on your pets” comment. ‘Fess up, Steve! I know it was you.

153 Anonymous April 27, 2012 at 4:36 pm

I showed this to my 9 year old daughter because I thought it was hysterical and she loves irony. After finishing reading, she looked at me and asked about the author, “Is she a grown up?”

154 Kristin April 27, 2012 at 4:39 pm

I showed this to my 9 year old daughter because I thought it was hilarious and she loves irony. After she read it and laughed as I’d hoped she would, she looked at me curiously, “mom, was it a grown-up who did that?”

155 sean April 28, 2012 at 11:37 pm

I am now forbidden to read your blog in bed. And your book. And textsfromlastnight.com. And peopleofwalmart.com. Although while the sheer number of things I’m prohibited from doing in bed is declining, the quality of the things i do get to do in bed remains quite high.

it’s exactly what you think it is, but get your mind out of the gutter. honestly your gramma would be aghast. AGHAST I TELL YOU.

so there’s that.

156 KenzieLee May 4, 2012 at 8:34 am

You inspire me!

157 Kayla June 4, 2012 at 10:13 pm

BAWLING LAUGHING.
Nearly forced into laugh induced labor at 33 weeks.

HAHAHAHAHAHAOUCHAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAAOOOUUUCCCCHHHH!!
Kayla recently posted..Lack of PowerMy Profile

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge

Previous post:

Next post: