(UPDATED!) I’m less sick than before but I’m also less than I was before.

First off, several of you recently asked if I was tested for Hashimoto’s Disease and so yesterday I asked my doctor when I was in for more blood work and she was like, “Yeah, of course you have Hashimoto’s Disease.  You have a lot of diseases.”  And then she shrugged and went back to listing all the things I was doing wrong.  And that sort of sums up my whole year.

I am feeling a bit better compared to where I was a few months ago but not sure if it’s because of the meds, diet, testosterone, supplements or the fact that since I feel better I finally have the strength to leave the house and walk or swim again.  I’ve been on this awful doctor-mandated low carb/low sugar diet for a month and the good thing is that I’ve lost 12 pounds and the bad thing is pretty much everything else involved in eating low carb/ low sugar.  It’s nice that I’ve lost 12 pounds but I still have to lose more and I sort of wonder if I just feel less awful because there’s now slightly less of me to feel awful and by that reasoning I will probably feel my best after I’ve been dead for 6 months.

Also, when I saw my doctor she was putting another woman on the same diet and I was like, “It’s a weird diet.  You can have all the bacon and vodka you want, but no carrots” and my doctor was like, “That’s…not really the diet I put you on” I was all, “You specifically said no carrots” and she was like, “Yeah, I’m not arguing about the carrot part…” and she started talking about heart problems but I stopped listening because basically every time she talks I get a new disease.

Also, helpful hint for people on the same low carb, low sugar diet I’m on: Get some of those already roasted whole chickens at the grocery store because they’re delicious and when you rip it apart with your hands you can pretend you’re a giant and that it’s the torso of the person who put you on the low carb diet.  Additionally, hummus wrapped in lettuce leaves = somewhat filling and also the saddest burrito ever.  I plan on staying on the diet for another month or two but I don’t think I can do longer than that because bread is delicious and with all the vodka I’m drinking I might be getting too healthy.

PS.  FUCK.  I have to do blood work each year to make sure I’m healthy enough to stay on my injections for rheumatoid arthritis and as I was finishing this post my rheumatologist just called to let me know that my blood work shows that I’ve been infected with tuberculosis bacteria.

JESUS CHRIST.  I APOLOGIZE TO WHOEVER I HAVE OFFENDED.  PLEASE REMOVE WHATEVER TERRIBLE CURSE YOU PUT ON ME.  I HAVE LEARNED MY LESSON.  (Disclaimer: I’ve learned nothing, but I will  pretend I have as hard as you want if you make this all stop.)

Apparently it’s not incredibly uncommon for people to carry the TB bacteria if you live in a third world country, are in prison, or have auto-immune diseases (bingo) but only like 10% of us will actually progress to full-blown tuberculosis so today I have to get chest x-rays to see if I’m more “moderately healthy ex-felon” or “Doc Holliday with a vagina.”  Chances are that I’m the first (and not contagious, so no worries if you hugged me recently) but because I’m more susceptible to TB now I have to meet with my doctor to find other treatment options for my RA because my injections make it super easy to get severe TB so I probably can’t stay on them and these injections are the only thing keeping me out of that wheelchair and now I’m going to just cry for an hour.

It could be worse and I’m sure it’ll be fine but I’m just really sick and tired of being sick and tired and of having my whole life revolve around not dying.  And I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about it too.  Sorry.  I feel your pain, dude.

PPS.  I looked for a gif to sum all this up and when I looked up “I’M HAVING A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN” this came up, and yeah…it’s pretty perfect:

UPDATED: “Your chest x-rays look clear. Your TB is just in your blood.” NOT DYING OF CONSUMPTION YET, MOTHERFUCKER! This is a weird thing to celebrate, but I will take it.

405 replies. read them below or add one

  1. I am also on a low carb, low sugar diet. I love losing weight, but I want to kill everyone around me. I’m sorry you are suffering. 😦

    Liked by 4 people

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  2. “Doc Holliday with a vagina.” I died.

    Liked by 10 people

  3. Ugh, dude. Just…. UGH. Much love.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. This sucks Jenny. I was still feeling the warm fuzzies from Dorthy barker letting us see the candid selfie, and now I hear you’re working with a whole new set of issues.

    Barely related, but maybe helpful, I hear that one of the treatments for TB is a carb heavy diet. The voices in my head are the ones telling me this, but still, they are usually worth listening to…

    Liked by 3 people

    Gabe Burkhardt recently posted June 21 is International Yoga Day AND Hiked Naked Day #multitasking.

  5. That super sucks. I don’t know if this will cheer you up but a friend of mine recently lost her job (I know that part won’t cheer you up I’m not a monster), and I sent her a copy of You Are Here to make her feel better and these were her comments:

    “I got encouragement in the form of an anonymous gift in the mail to day that made me cry, right before I just about busted a gut laughing. SERIOUSLY you need to check out author Jenny Lawson!” (Facebook post)

    and

    “I got the most amazing coloring book today from Amazon by Jenny Lawson. I remember you mentioning her in one of the channels recently and had looked her up at the library. So, even though the note was anonymous, if that was you that ordered the book for me, that was an AWESOME pick me up. If you weren’t, you get thanks for my donor by proxy. Either way, YOU ROCK.” (Direct message to me)

    So you made her week better and made me feel like a good friend so. You’re still awesome even if your body hates you sometimes.

    Liked by 5 people

  6. I am sorry all of this is happening to you. On the up side, that gif is marvelous and pretty much sums up how I am feeling right now too. Please feel better but never stop feeling like you can write all of this up this way. You are magical.

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. I’m soooo sorry about your nervous breakdown. And your curse! More about the nervous breakdown, really, because it sounds like someone was super fucking serious about that curse and I don’t want them to curse me for being too sympathetic, you know?

    But real talk? It sounds like you’re not drinking enough vodka. I’m not an expert in very much, but I drink a lot of vodka and I’ve never had a nervous breakdown with a drink in my hand. Kissed someone whose name I don’t remember? Sure. Nervous breakdown? Not even once.

    Liked by 7 people

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  8. Speaking only for myself, I can assure you that I never get tired of reading your hilarious thoughts on anything at all. I wish you weren’t going through all this, of course, but it clearly hasn’t had the slightest effect on your seamless wit.

    Liked by 2 people

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  9. Well, the silver lining to “Doc Holliday with a vagina” is that you will now sound ULTRA cool whenever you say “I’m your huckleberry” because really that was Val Kilmer at his peak handsomeness.
    Also maybe we should do a blood exchange because some of my Grave’s disease might help cancel out some of your Hashimoto’s and vice versa (or vicey versey, as my grammy used to say).

    Like

  10. Don’t apologize. You’ve totally made up for anything by giving us a David Tennant gif, Even if it is his serious face. No, no, don’t worry. We’re cool.

    Like

  11. Good Lord woman. If it wasn’t for bad luck, you wouldn’t have any! But here’s the deal, maybe if you get ALL the diseases, they will start to cancel each other out and you’ll basically end up with super powers and can heal all the sick people you love (as well as giving sicknesses to asshats who suck and gave you diseases by cursing you). Maybe? We love you no matter what. You’re my favorite weirdo, and that’s saying a lot. XOXOXOXOXO!!!!

    Liked by 5 people

  12. Hashimoto’s has kicked my butt since I was 15. I am collecting autoimmune diseases. What the hell – why do they feel the need to herd?!

    Liked by 5 people

  13. I have been in and out of doctors for all kinds of diseases since I was 14 and that’s halfy life at this point and they still don’t know what’s wrong with me. So I hear you, and I’m not sick of hearing about it. I relate so hard.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. 14
    Stacey Lunsford

    Sweet Christmas! I would totally hug your disease-ridden self if I was there right now. I am so sorry. Your choices suck, although between “Doc Holliday with a vagina” or “Batgirl is now Oracle” (full-blown TB vs. wheelchair), I think I know which one you would pick because you are a kick-ass superhero. Love ya.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Ew to the low carb diet… yay to vodka! But I laughed too hard at “I stopped listening because basically every time she talks I get another disease…” too relatable!!!! I’ll have some carb-full meals just for you so you can enjoy them via osmosis (well, Just more carbs than “so-carb-free-that-carrots-are-bad”… I still have to eat healthy or I’ll end up sicker than I am).

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  16. I had a dietitian or two try to put me on a low-carb diet because the chronic condition I have is part of a family of illnesses and the diet is the first thing that pops up when they search for it. SO irritating because it’s actually contraindicated for my condition. GIVE ME ALL THE PIZZA! MY LIVER SAYS SO!

    I’m glad you’re beginning to feel better. I wish it would be a faster process for you. Patience for patients. There should be a ‘script for patience.

    Liked by 1 person

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  17. Oh my! Go ahead and cry. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired too, and you fucking deserve to feel bad. Once you get rid of the TB you will be able to get back on your RA meds. I’m starting with a new rheumatologist next week – three injectables already, with quality of life side effects. I’m hoping for a new approach. Hang in there. Sometimes life just plain old sucks.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. So sorry to hear about all your medical problems, but RESPECT! I could not last two days on a low carb/low sugar diet. Not my fault, I’m Italian!!!!

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  19. I was in prison for almost 20 years(I worked there, I swear) and had to get tested for TB yearly. I always tested with what they said was a false positive and had to do another test. I think I might be carrying numerous deadly diseases(including TB) with no symptoms. I’m the typhoid mary of the library world. I hope things start to look up health-wise soon.,

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  20. 20
    Jennifer A.

    Now I feel better about my supposed pink eye. Sorry your going through all this.

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  21. 21
    wasnt_serious


    All in favor of a Bloggess Army field trip to New Orleans to find a voodoo priestess to remove any curse placed on our beloved leader?

    Liked by 2 people

  22. I too have been exposed to TB-no prison, but maybe the dorm. The good news is that if you’re not the Doc Holiday type, there is a medication (because you’d love to keep track of one more I’m sure) that will actually reduce your risk of getting full blown TB below that of someone who hasn’t been exposed. The bad news is that you have to take it for 9 months and you have to limit drinking because the meds are hard on your liver. Take care!

    Like

  23. That’s a lot to process Jenny! And you do it with all the wit, humor and smarts that makes me love ya like crazypants!! Sidenote: you need bread to soak up the vodka. It’s a medicinal sponge!

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  24. Much love! Hang in there!

    Like

  25. Jenny, you can talk about whatever is ailing you all you want. Your vagina matters. Your shitting matters. Your lungs matter. Goddamnit, YOU MATTER. My only request is that you don’t. fucking. die. So eat chickens, get algae shots, sniff turnip paste, DO WHATEVER THE FUCK IT TAKES…JUST STAY ALIVE! Thanks. That will be all for now.

    Liked by 5 people

    the incurable dreamer recently posted not so stupid after all.

  26. That really is quite a lot of shit to carry around. If I could email you some health I would. Have a virtual hug instead (sorry about the cat fluff on the hug, it is hot and moulty here). xx

    Liked by 2 people

  27. 27
    Kelly Stoker

    I am really sorry. Sometimes you just get the point that if one more person, tells you one more bad thing, you’re going to lose it. I understand. I don’t have near as many things wrong with me physically (universe I am not complaining), but I have been in that place. I don’t have a lot of good advice to give, but you are worth the fight. Keep fighting. You matter. Peace be with you. Kelly

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  28. I’m so sorry! I have RA too and know what it’s like to be taken off of a med that works (mine was because insurance stopped paying for it). I hope the TB is cured and you can go back to the biologics. I just got a call from my RA doctor saying my new med appears to be working (according to my labs, but I’ve also been on prednisone so how do they know for sure?) but that my blood sugars are elevated. So now I’m thinking, oh great, diabetes. I see my GP next week.
    Gentle hugs dear lady.

    Like

  29. I’m on the carb-nazi diet too right now. Yes, it is working. I am actually not feeling as stabby as I thought I would. I know that doesn’t help, but for the first time I am losing weight consistently, and although there is a certain level of food-obsession associated with this diet, it is, for lack of a better way of putting it, a “controlled obsession”. My favorite (non-curse-word) phrase for the moment: “fat bomb”.

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  30. I’ve decided that those of us who live with these chronic conditions – because they do come in groups, never singles – are taking one for the human team. A bunch of the shitty genetics get lumped in us so that other people (probably including Victor), can live “normal” disease free lives. Remember Jenny, we’re super heroes saving the healthy people, taking all the genetic hits so they will not have to.

    Also, the world owes us all the chocolate, carbs, and liquor we want because by god we’re suffering for others!

    Liked by 3 people

  31. Pray to Apollo and sacrifice your goat. At this point I think it’s your only option.

    Liked by 2 people

  32. Just Remember, if you do go all Doc Holiday. Sawed off Double Barrel shotguns are illegal.

    Like

  33. Sending much love! Auto immune issues suck hard. Hope you find a balance of meds/diet/voodoo that helps you fall apart less.

    Like

  34. Re: the diet—over 3 years ago I put myself on low-carb/low-sugar because I was rapidly heading towards diabetes. Two uncles, one g’father (who died from complications), and 1 cousin(who has already lost 2 toes) all have been diabetics and I was terrified. The first several months were hard and I continually felt sorry for myself. Now I am no longer in the “danger” zone and feel fine. In fact, whenever I slip off the diet, which happens and I don’t beat myself up about it, I feel sick and sluggish for a few days. So, stick with it. It gets easier and you will feel better.

    Liked by 1 person

  35. 35
    Julianne Terrill

    oh, dear. I follow a low-histamine diet, which means if you like it and it tastes good, don’t eat it.

    Like

  36. I am very, very angry at the person who cursed you and the universe in general for allowing all of these things to happen to you! You are the most loving, generous, entertaining person in the whole world, and are specifically the least deserving of these monstrosities being visited upon you! I keep a pair of Haitian voodoo dolls on my desk at work, and if you can provide me with a personal effect of the culprit who is doing this to you I will try to work my magic. (Full disclosure: I am not a voodoo priestess, but the dolls do have a palliative effect.)

    In the meantime, I am sending all of my love to you! Laurie

    Liked by 2 people

  37. 37
    JenniferNennifer

    Just sending love and healing energies your way.

    Like

  38. 38
    Chris carrero

    Hugs

    Like

  39. Whoa, and I thought my sister had the worst health problems. When I talk to people about her and they ask about which auto-immune diseases she has, I just say all of them, because seriously, listing the problems she doesn’t have would be easier than listing the ones she does. But she does not have TB! You win the prize! A very sucky, tubercular prize. So sorry you are going through all this craziness and also can’t eat carbs or sugar. That would make me seriously cranky. Thank you for sharing; your take on life always makes me feel a bit better about my own, not because I think your life is sucky (although your health problems certainly are), but because of how your strength and humor and talent shine through even while sharing your difficulties.

    I sometimes think I am the only person ever who has gone on a low sugar, low carb diet and not lost weight. I think primarily because without eating a fair amount of aged cheese and nuts I didn’t have enough energy to get out of bed. How can one be expected to function on a diet without any bread or sugar without large amounts of cheese to make up for the lack of other delicious things? I had a candida infection in my esophagus and my diet was strict enough that my doctor said I couldn’t even drink milk because it had too much sugar in it. I hate milk (in it’s regular form), so ultimately this was fine with me, but still weird. I had to be on this diet and also had to suck on foul tasting lozenges every 6 hours for 3 months. I did not lose even a little bit of weight and I craved sugar and carbs EVERY SINGLE DAY. I often work with actor/dancer types who tend to be all about the latest healthy eating fad and if I had a nickel for every time someone told me the cravings would stop if I stuck with it for at least a month and I then I wouldn’t even miss sugar or bread, I would probably hit said actors with the big bag of change I would have accumulated.

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  40. The ra meds make it hard on your body. I’m sorry you have to go through this crap. The diet doesn’t help mentally with feeling crazy. More vodka and chicken. Drink it from a horn and be a Viking.

    Liked by 1 person

  41. fistbump I see my neurologist in two hours. I have an awesome embroidery I commissioned from a local artist. When I finish this I’m gonna go back to twitter and post it in the thread. It’s about the whole scenario, not whether you are going to be OK

    You are going to be OK. Some of us get better…we just never get well. You’ve got RA…you know this. All the hugs and I’m sorry about the low carb thing. I remember what the first two years were like after I got diagnosed with Celiac disease…and I am allowed to have rice, potato and corn. You are one tough woman. You got this,

    Liked by 1 person

  42. My mom also has rheumatoid arthritis and has had it since when was 17.she took Remicade for a long time and it was great for her..slowed her disease down, she felt good and had energy, Then, she got an infection in her knee replacement. The infection was so bad she had to be without her knee…yes,, totally without her left knee for almost 2 years. So no more Remicade.her disease has since been wreaking havoc on her. It is everywhere including her neck, spine and jaw..the last few places that it wasn’t. I am not telling you this to scare you. My mom’s doctors have assured her that no one else with her same disease (including Hashimoto’s because of the RA) will ever have to be as bad as she is. Great for everyone else. Anyway, her doctors just approved her for Orencia. It is another biologic similar to remicade but the effect on her immune system is less. Maybe talk to your doctors about this one. good luck.,

    Like

  43. Glad you’re feeling better but I’m so sorry about the constant ring a round the diagnosis you’ve been having to do. Sending good vibes and (hopefully) good news your way friend!

    Like

  44. Not tired of hearing about it, because I’m constantly amazed at how you get through it all and are still able to make us all laugh. You also make me realize I take my current good health for granted but still, I’m so envious of your funny that I’ll keep coming back for more no matter what you write about or how frequently you do it.

    Liked by 1 person

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  45. Tuberculosis.
    WTG, Camille.

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  46. I understand this a little too well. I have diabetes and am on a low-carb, low-sugar diet pretty much permanently. Most people don’t realize “the diabeetus” is an autoimmune disease and leaves the door open for other autoimmune issues. This year I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, hidradenitis suppurativa, and stasis dermatitis – all within a span of about 2 months. The last month has been hell because they can’t get me on the medication my doctors want me on – one that will treat my RA and HS. The one they put me on in the “meantime” caused glorious digestive pyrotechnics. Long story short – I get you. I know what it’s like to be so tired of trying not to let all the things wrong with your body just kill you. You post about it all you want. Some of us identify with your pain on a level that might be scary to anyone not us.

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  47. Low carb low sugar turns me into a raving lunatic! My sympathies for being unwell and unable to eat f-ing bread. Got put on high carb plant-based this year… and it’s been pretty great. Have all the pizza, vodka, and carrots you want! But no bacon.

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  48. 48
    Courtjester

    I’m not sure where or how the concept fits into the picture, but you may want to read this :

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  49. I just used it’s instead of its in my previous post and can’t figure out how to edit it. Grammar gods, please have mercy on me.

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  50. My body was jelly of you and now I’m back on low carb. Pork rinds, cauliflower, and the Vegetti are my best friends again. Try some bacon, tomatoes, and a little mayo in your lettuce leaf. Makes a more interesting burrito. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  51. I’m pretty sure I tread on an ant a couple of years ago, and it looked into the sky and cursed it’s fate, and somehow it hit you. Hopefully you can get to the bottom of the crap well and find a pot of fresh bread and icecream (or cures for your sickness) Feel better!

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  52. Time to ditch Texas. At least stop playing with the armadillos. They are most definitely not your friends. My sincerest hopes that they can get the TB treated and keep you on an RA regimen that keeps you OUT of a wheelchair. At least let you walk if you can’t eat anything decent.

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  53. I am really sorry. I also am on a restricted carb diet.(diabetes) I did find a low-ish carb bread substitute to keep me semi-sane. From Joseph’s Middle Eastern Bakery: Flax,Oat Bran and whole wheat flour Pita has total carbs of 9g, but 4g of that is fiber. Net carb is only 5g/pita. Also comes in Lavash-serving of lavash is 1/2 of a lavash. If you eat a whole lavash, it’s 16g total carbs-of which 8g are fiber. Net carb for a whole lavash is 8g. For the official “serving” of a half of a lavash, it’s half 8g/4g/4g. You can make a simulated pizza with either of these! Check with your doc to see if ok. And it tastes good, and doesn’t crumble as much as a low carb tortilla.

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  54. Oh honey, I’m so sorry! I did the low carb/low sugar thing when first diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. Felt energized for a while, but the hallucinations were a bit much! I just wish my meds didn’t aggravate my IBS-D. Learned the hard way to always take a change of clothes on long day trips 😉

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  55. Ugh I too have am on a low carb/sugar diet. It sucks. Worse though is I also can’t have bacon or cheese because cholesterol. Maybe find a priest to exercise the curse? Wait.. is that how it works?

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  56. UGH. As someone who also lives in an autoimmune shit storm, I feel you. I FEEL YOU SO MUCH. I spent years trying to get some sort of diagnosis and once I did, it never stopped… each year brought on some other stupid fucking disease.
    Good luck, I am here for you, even if we don’t know each other.

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  57. I need to be on the same diet, grrr. Big gentle hugs.

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  58. I tested positive for the TB bug back in college, and because of the preventative medication they put me on, I couldn’t have bananas (meh), herring (the fuck?) or any alcohol whatsoever. (My mom looked at me with wide eyes and went, “Oh my God, are you going to be okay?!”)BUT I’m pretty sure the low-carb/low-sugar diet supercedes the TB meds, so you can have all the vodka you want. That’s just science.

    Also, I got sober in 2012, but I need to lose a couple of pounds, so that means I too can have all the vodka I want. (KIDDING. I kid. That’s just the tuberculosis talking.)

    ProTip: Rip off pieces of the roast chicken and dip it in the hummus. Best. Nachos. Ever.

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  59. I wish I could fix it. I really do. You’re not alone, if that helps at all.

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  60. I’m sorry you are going through all this. I can relate though being under the same curse. I was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. I love carbs and sugar. Going shopping now makes me cry and tbh a bit suicidal in life. Because I’m on my phone I have to do this in parts.

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  61. For the last few days I’ve been feeling just too bloody tired of being tired and in pain. I know I shouldn’t let it get the best of me but sometimes it does anyway. Your post just gave me a bitch slap and told me to go do the vacuuming. Thanks for that, Jenny. I now kind of resent you but I suppose it’s better to resent you than The Viking (at least in his opinion) because I have to LIVE with him. Hang in there. :o)

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    Mrs. Completely recently posted Sex On The Beach – Friday Fictioneers.

  62. Ugh…When will this blasé attitude from doctors about thyroid issues stop?? “Well of course you have Hashimoto’s…” erghh…. I am so sorry you’re going through this. It seems like when it comes to the body, when one thing breaks, it creates a never-ending chain reaction… hoping you get some relief soon! (also, I’m glad I found your blog!)

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  63. I also got a bacterial skin infection in my right arm. Had to go to the er. Said with diabetes I can be prone to infections until I get my sugar under control. Also, my pap test came back where I had to have a colposcopy (I may have spelled that wrong)

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  64. I am so very sorry for all you are going through. I wish I could offer some helpful suggestion to make things better. Sadly, all I can think of is that you need a “Fuck this shit” onesie now as I think you have progressed beyond the discrete “Fuck this shit” socks.

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  65. (Part 3) When I had that done, I had a rare complication where they had to open my cervix. Said they never seen that before. Yes, it’s as painful as it sounds. Biopsy came back normal. Pap test every year now. Oh and I have HPV.

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  66. Are you by any chance on Humira or Enbrel for you RA? I used to be on both of those (at different times) but, yeah. That shit is scary, but I was able to stop taking them as I was taking them for psoriasis, not RA.

    (No, I’m on Simponi. Same family though. ~ Jenny)

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  67. Does your rheumatologist prescribe cannabis? Something at least to discuss. Best to you!

    (Sadly, Texas isn’t a fan of the stuff. ~ Jenny)

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  68. Have you looked into cannabis for your RA?

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  69. Ugh. Fuck RA, Fuck Hashimoto’s, and, most especially, fuck that low-carb diet. So sorry. Do you take mega doses of vitamin D? My rheumatologist has me on 50,000 mg once a week. It gives me a little burst of energy (comparatively speaking) when I take it. Sending you a virtual pizza.

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  70. 70
    Tiffany Kotz

    I’m so sorry this is happening to you sweet lady! I feel your pain! I already had a bunch of chronic health problems and then
    2 days ago I did something stupid and broke my back. Now i just get to stare at the ceiling without enough pain meds.

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  71. If it makes you feel any better I have had hashimotos for years and it’s very manageable. Much love… we are rooting for you.

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  72. I can only imagine how damn difficult it must be for you to face each day with anything approaching optimism but you seem to manage it, somehow. Please know that you can always whinge about all these very very valid complaints and we shall never try to take that tiny comfort from you…I for one would much rather you rant to me for an hour face-to-face about how much it hurts if it distracted you from the pain for that hour.

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    klementineisme recently posted St-Germain-des-Prés (6th arrondissement).

  73. (Part 4) that’s just medical. I have a ton of mental health. Now with the healthcare bill, i can’t work, disabled because my autistic son beat the shit outta me (he’s in my mom and step-dad’s custody). And I’m on Medicaid. So all in all I wanted you to know that you are not alone and i too am sorry for whatever I did. I apologize that I did this in parts, my phone makes the post comment thing go away after so many words, except for this post. Must be user error. I didn’t mean to make this about me. I’m sorry. I feel for you. Big big hugs. Think of it this way, you get to go back to eating carbs and sugar. 🙂 xo

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  74. (((internet hugs))) I’m so sorry. And I’m not sick of hearing about it, it makes me feel less alone with my health issues (((more hugs)))

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  75. I’ve been complaining for two weeks about being on a no dairy no soy diet so I can breastfeed my finicky child. I’m going to shut up now. I’m so sorry. I really hope things get better fast.

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  76. 76
    fruitcakewriter

    That stinks. So sorry you are going through this.

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  77. Good heavens. Your body needs to stop trying to kill you. It isn’t even nice anymore. I’m glad the diet is working but it sounds like a hard one to stay on. No carrots? Who ever heard of such a thing. Carrots are good for you. Aren’t they? Now I’m confused and craving carrots. I couldn’t do the vodka though. Nasty stuff.

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  78. Courage, Camille, and I agree with Burns the Fire. Some medical marijuana might help a whole hell of a lot.

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  79. Well, shit. Just shit. That’s horrible, I’m so sorry. Did you ask the doctor about just putting you in a bubble, like John Travolta in Boy in a Bubble? Would that help? Don’t ever apologize for telling us what’s going on with you. We care, and we care A LOT. In fact, I have a Post-It note on my desk with the names of the people I pray for, and your name is on it. That way, whenever I look in the direction of the stickee, or am on a boring phone call (which is an every day occurrence), I can look at the stickee and pray for everyone. I love you!

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  80. 80
    Twisted Turtle

    You make me laugh, if that helps at all.

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  81. Please google ‘diet dr’ for low carb high fat recipes that are fucking delicious….

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  82. Aw, Jenny I wish Samantha was here to blink and make it all go away…Just though of something…I hope you know who Samantha is…I’m old…er

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  83. So, this may sound weird and too hippy dippy, but I was so tired of being sick and tired and anxious and depressed and sick that I was willing to try anything to either make it better or rationalize actually offing myself, that I went through a new form of therapy that takes the focus off the physical/mental and instead uses self-directed compassion to help heal wounds that create all of this physical manifestation and pain. I spent 15 years with traditional doctors and medications, and after a year of this, I’m off all the medications and an entirely different person. I actually found your writing when I was deep in the hell of this, and you were such a gift…maybe this can be a gift to you. The best part is you can do it from home, without pants! It’s called Compassion Key…compassionkey.com, you can specifically choose someone who specializes in health issues.

    I swear I don’t get any kickback from this, and yes, it has an airy fairy vibe…but frankly, all the traditional stuff doesn’t seem to be working (just as it didn’t for me) so I think it’s worth a shot! Happy to answer any questions if you have them!

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  84. 84
    Nancycccslp

    Tuberculosis! Neat! I currently have an entire bladder filled with TB, kindly put there via my oncologist, to fight bladder cancer, which I shouldn’t have gotten in the first place since I’m a 51 year old gal who never smoked or drank (but I’m thinking of starting both). So, maybe you’re just ahead of the curve for fighting bladder cancer.
    Got to go; time to roll to my other side. I kid you not.

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  85. “And I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about it too.” Not. Share as much as you want. We’ll be here. I’m so sorry that you can’t get a break. Not being able to take medication that works for you sucks, big time.

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  86. I am on the FodMap diet and the Celiacs diet. I get angry easily because I can’t have baked goods, ice cream, and just about anything else in the world of food. I mean if it were just a simple thing like ‘you can’t eat kale’, then life would be good. And I would be able to eat like a normal person. But when can I just be a normal person. (Autocorrect just tried to correct ‘a normal person’ to ‘abnormal person’! Fuck you, Autocorrect! Stop judging me!!)
    But I am jealous your Doctor prescribed you to drink vodka! Mine just tells me it’s bad for me!!

    E

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  87. “Doc Holliday with a vigina!!”! roflmao!! that was brilliant even more so cause ive described my self as going all” doc holliday” Im also a latent inactive tb converter .. exposure at university… did the 6 mos med thing.. actually gives you less of a chance of ever converting to ful blown.. but im so sorry this is adding to your list … having a growing one myself i totally empathize it sucks! but asthe mad hatter says”all the best people do..”(well actually it’s “are mad”) but my shrink informs me confidentlly im either the sanest crazy person he knows or i qualify for a all expense paid trip to a padded room anytime i want quiet for a few days!)

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  88. So as far as low carb? Chicken lettuce wraps totally do not suck and can sometimes make the whole low carb thing worthwhile.

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  89. I am so damn sorry about all this. It totally sucks. And is completely unfair. And while it doesn’t really help, a quote that speaks to me comes from Babylon 5:
    I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, ‘wouldn’t it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?’ So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.

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  90. So, I feel your pain! Well, not all of it. But the TB part. I had a positive skin test years ago and had to take medicine for 6 months. Health department check in every week and if you don’t comply we will put you in jail medicine for 6 months. Now, I still have to have chest X-rays yearly and can’t take a skin test again. Do they still give you that medicine? Just curious. It was controversial and some MD’s did not agree with making people take it.

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  91. Uuughhh. That sucks. They caught that I had a latent TB infection before my first dose of a TNF inhibitor. My chest x-ray was negative. I had to do 9 months of heavy duty antibiotics (Isoniazid) and was able to start Humira with no problem after the first four weeks of treatment. I wouldn’t have needed the treatment at all if I hadn’t also needed to suppress my immune system for my Psoriatic Arthritis. The bad news? No vodka for nine months. It’s like being pregnant to full term without the squalling infant at the end. I hope your chest x-ray is negative and that they have a way to keep you on the meds that help your RA best.

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  92. Duuuuuuuude. Yikes.

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  93. I’m going through some ridiculous intestinal thing where I can’t eat anything but soup and salads without intense pain, so yeah. THIS DIET SUCKS. PIZZA NEEDED. Anyway, what we really need is MAGIC. Look at this spell from D&D: Greater restoration also dispels all magical effects penalizing the creature’s abilities, cures all temporary ability damage, and restores all points permanently drained from all ability scores. It also eliminates fatigue and exhaustion, and removes all forms of insanity, confusion, and similar mental effects. Greater restoration does not restore levels or Constitution points lost due to death.

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  94. I have the MTHFR mutation which sounds cool because I get to call it the ‘mothereffer’ and you’d think if you get to be a mutant you’d get to make out with Hugh Jackmam or at least get a cool superhero outfit but really all I got was a greater likelihood of having thyroid problems and autoimmune diseases and all sorts of other crap. Yay genetics!!! I’m on the same diet but don’t always do a great job at actually doing it? But I absolutely feel better when I do so there’s that. Anyways from a functional medicine standpoint a lot of people who have similar symptoms actually have this mutation because it affects the way your body processes folate and literally every system in your body uses methylation in its processes so a lot can go wrong. If you have it too it could explain a lot. I say there should be outfits.

    (I’ve got that one too. It’s like I’m collecting them. ~ Jenny)

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  95. I, too, am a carrier of TB. I’ve had it for 37 years (I was 2 when they figured it out), and I’ve NEVER had an issue. So, TB carriers unite awkward high five

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  96. That totally sucks!

    I have some friends on Trim Healthy Mama (THM) plan, and they do low carbs/ no sugar. BUT- here is the cool part. They found / made all sorts of yummy recipes to get around it. (Supposedly once you are off sugar/ carbs, your body is tricked into thinking that these could be the real thing!)

    A lot of people I know are on it and love it. Google a ton of yummy THM recipes/ workarounds to get chocolate and carbs back in your life!

    (I just need to get motivated to start it for reals. I try here and there.)

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  97. I’m so sorry this is happening to you. Tuberculosis? WTF? That can’t be right. (I mean, I know it’s right, but I can’t believe it. Tuberculosis? Really? Really, Universe? Really?)

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  98. I have Hashimoto’s as well. Ask your doc. if you can have a Brazil nut everyday. Those are Selenium-rich and help. Also, Cytomel saved my life. I take Synthroid and Cytomel everyday. Auto-immune diseases suck. I hope you feel better soon.

    (I was doing the brazil nut thing but then I had an allergic reaction so now I’m taking a selenium supplement instead. ~ Jenny)

    Liked by 1 person

  99. Being discouraged is the pits, but being in despair is worse. It’s great when your diseases fight with each other and your meds declare war on your body. OTOH you would look really fetching in a Doc Holiday hat! Hugs

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  100. I am so sorry. This sucks like only a sucking thing can. Suckier than hungry vampires. Or Northern mosquitos. Major suckiness.

    Thanks for letting us see behind the curtain. Some days it’s just all too much and I don’t even want to get out of bed but then there you are, Not as inspiration, per se, but more as “Yep. Lots of people fighting these demons” way. Usually enough to get me up, at least.

    (Wish i could figure out how to become a demon-slayer. I would slay them so hard.)

    My kitty-lumps say hi: Timon, who weighs 20+ lbs, and who claims the spot on the bed where my feet should go before anyone gets under the covers, so then you’re pinned. Pumbaa, who mostly just likes to walk across you a few times so you get the idea that upstairs, his FOOD DISH IS EMPTY. Once the alarm’s gone off once, he scales up to knocking things off the dresser/nightstand. Snuffles, who is my snuggly orange attachment kitty, he usually comes to hang out behind my knees. And puttle, who sleeps far away from the horde, somewhere safe. Usually in my closet, because she’s all white and sheds like crazy. Anyways, hi.

    Liked by 1 person

  101. The six buck cluck is my favorite safe food. When I feel sad about my incomprehensible health developments, I imagine I am mutating into a superhero. Or a super villain depending on the day.

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  102. Maybe it’s the Vampire Brotherhood that put a curse on you. You may want to reach out them again. Tell them that you’re sorry. Just a suggestion, couldn’t hurt, right?

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  103. I just wanted to give you a hug. (((HUG)))

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  104. If the love of strangers could heal you, you would be so damn healthy. Since it doesn’t, fuck this shit indeed.

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  105. Low carb works, but it sucks. Good luck with yours.

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  106. I know a lot of people are raving about Halo Top ice cream. It’s low calorie, high protein, low sugar ice cream. https://www.halotop.com/ I’m not sure if it fits with your diet but wanted to share just in case. If it doesn’t, feel free to throw all the f-bombs my way! I hate people who offer useless unsolicited advice… STFU you know?!?

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  107. Romaine lettuce, hummus and pieces of warm roasted chicken- one of my favorite lunches. If you cry into it, adds a little extra saltiness. Delicious.

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  108. 108
    Jami Shofner

    PORK RINDS HAVE NO CARBS!

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  109. I am so sorry to hear you’re having a bad go of it right now. I wish I could offer more comfort but all I’ve got are cliches: This too shall pass, you’re not alone, we love you. All true though! Love the I’m having a breakdown GIF. Saw this on Pintrest and thought of you. Perhaps your chicken needs a t-Rex friend? http://pin.it/N6RdX_i

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  110. Jeez Jenny, this sounds like a world of suck and I’m sorry.

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  111. Sorry you’re having health issues. I, too, have the autoimmune thing going – ugh. Arthritis for more than half my life. Was eating Paleo diet for 3 years then started the LCHF diet this January. Weight is down, BP is down, pain is almost gone…can’t wait to see the blood tests results. I like it. All the bacon I can eat. And cheese. So many people have said their health has normalized because of this way of eating. That’s what I’m going for. Anything you want to eat from the SAD (standard american diet) can be keto-fied (look up fat-head pizza). There are some great support groups on FB. I hope you stick to it, and look at it as “I’m feeding my body so it can heal” and “those effing sugar dealers have effed up our bodies for over 50 years because they paid off the scientists to report that fat was the culprit for health issues, and I’m pissed that they got me hooked on sugar.” And I love your blog. Peace and happiness.

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  112. It is official…you are my spirit animal. All along I’ve been able to relate to the medical issues you post about – but you pretty much just summed up my current situation (although my RA injections haven’t landed me with TB yet…but with my luck that will be next). Autoimmune diseases suck, Hashi sucks, RA sucks, low carb/low sugar diets new-circle-in-hell-suck, losing weight is awesome but the steps to do so suck. Thanks for posting some humor to make me laugh a little as I fight to not fall asleep at my desk. Sending positive vibes that you feel improvements soon.

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  113. I am so so sorry. You are possibly having the worst year ever. I am sending healthy thoughts your way!

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  114. I’m sorry that things are so hard right now. I think you are such a strong, caring, and wonderful person. And I just thought you should know.

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  115. Oh my God. I’m so sorry. Wish I could hug you (and bring you chocolate – fuck the diet).

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  116. My dad, who is a mostly healthy mid-70’s year old dude, was just in a study at Major Medical Center on basically that same diet. The docs were using the old dudes as guinea pigs to see if it would reduce their blood sugar enough to get them off meds. He lost about 40#s, and is skinnier now than when he was in VietNam. The day the study ended, he ate a giant cheeseburger. Upshot: the study results are showing that the diet (no lactose, no gluten, no some other -ose I can’t remember) does, in fact, help blood sugar and inflammation numbers get better.
    Downside: most of the old dudes agreed they’d rather be on insulin that eat chicken and broccoli 4x a day forever.
    Also good: your medical center must be doing its homework, since the study my dad was in just wrapped and was a huge federal grant-supported thingy. That’s good, right?
    Hope you feel better soon.

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  117. First, I am SO sorry all this crap is happening to you! Second, unfortunately, I can relate. I’m convinced it’s all the doctors’ fault. I was doing ok till I started seeing them. Ok, so maybe I waited a bit too long to see them, but I was busy having a life, back when I had one outside the waiting rooms. Third, thank God your funny bone isn’t broken! I have been told, more than once, not to joke around when I am really sick, but Fuck That! Who wants a bunch of sad faces around when you’re already in sad shape? (EMTs and the techs who run tests seem particularly unimpressed by humor, btw). I love you, Jenny. Rant on, fling dark humor and survive this however your muses dictate. Salud!

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  118. I don’t know how open you are to alternative stuff, but I have found this INSANELY helpful!! I had parasites, bacterial infection from poorly done wisdom teeth extractions 25 years and stage 3 Epstein-Barr and have been pretty wiped for a long time… I followed many of his recommendations (and worked with a Chinese medicine doctor) to help heal most of it. I’m not suggestion you stop your current doctors – you’re far more complicated than me! LOL! – I’m just suggesting you read this and see if some of his suggestions might fit into what you’re having to do with your doctors… (Mainly the 10th) https://www.amazon.com/Medical-Medium-Secrets-Chronic-Mystery/dp/1401948294/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1498153985&sr=8-1&keywords=anthony+william

    Sending you love and light!

    -Your hippie friend in Colorado.

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  119. Health stuff is super sucky and super annoying and the low carb thing is bullshit. I know it helps, but come one! A life without bread?

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  120. I was put on that damn diet for being a mutant. FYI, medical professionals are low in carbs, and made of meat. And it can hardly be considered cannibalism when your genes are so fucked up. It’d be more like eating a chimp or something – sad, but necessary if you are starving. Which you are, all the time, when they take away bread..

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  121. I carry TB as well. I found out because they do a test if you want to volunteer with hospice patients, so it seemed like I was being punished for being a good person. Also on board with the whole autoimmune and low carb/low sugar deal. God I miss grains. Every time you restart the diet it’s a bit easier, but I’ve pretty much been failing/restarting now for about 10 years. Good times! You are not alone. ((((Hug))))

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  122. Random re: the low carb no sugar diet. I’m on a 500 calorie/day diet that has no oils, carbs, sugar, etc (I know – eye roll), but I am doing it through a naturopath and I’m using some sort of homeopathic voodoo that helps me not crave sweets, feel full, not get tired, AND is detoxing my brain and body. So far have lost 15 pounds in 3 weeks and have NOT felt the need to cheat or kill anyone. I made kids cookies and macaroni and cheese yesterday and didn’t feel a compulsion to eat either. Might be worth looking at to help ease the pain of the crappy diet. DesBio is the program.

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  123. 123
    Shannon Lovelady

    Boo. Your maladies make my Celiac disease seem very trivial. I hope you get better news soon.
    P.S. Stop answering your phone

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  124. I don’t have anything particularly helpful to say or advice to give…just this: Sending major juicy, goody vibes to you and your bod and you are the best.

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  125. Weirdly I just said to my partner that my body will take its sweet time in dying my brain is another matter. Currently I have a 104 temp that I’ve had since 4:30 this morning. I took my temp when the riggers kicked in and it was 105.9 my partner who slept through all of my shaking from me having rigors and said you would have a seizure when it’s that high um who know possibly I did and you slept through it considering I smack her in the face because my arms weren’t working nor my eyes and when you’ve broken your stomach chugging water is bad bad even a popsicle can’t make you feel better nothing really can. Just an FYI infant Advil is disgusting and burns your throat! Feel better soon Jenny were all pulling for you. I also tested positive for this years ago (it was a false positive turns out I’m allergic to the stuff they inject under your skin. They put me on meds to fight the FB which I didn’t have and omg the side effects were horrible. I fell down a flight of concrete stairs in the hospital! Go figure not a single scratch juts a bruised tailbone! I 100% know if I were to head to the er my temp would be normal when I got there that’s how mean my body is! Best invention thermometer that hooks up to your I pad or iPhone ear jack and it tracks all symptoms etc. it’s also told me in Elmo’s voice three times to go to the hospital. Naw I’m good.

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  126. You are doing an amazing fucking job. I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you ARE. Thank you for what you do, for sharing this all with the world. We love you. We are rooting for you!!

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  127. Welcome to the Hashi club. It sucks about as much as the Lupus and Adrenal Fatigue club but we all have a great sense of humor….even if we can’t get out of bed!

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  128. Fun…it is about as much fun. We apparently can not type either.

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  129. Well fuck.

    I’d ask who the hell still gets TB but the answer is: Jenny. Jenny gets TB. I’m sure it’s a mild situation or else WebMD would have told you had TB (or cancer because obligatory).

    Maybe it’s not so much the low carb that is making you feel better but the vodka. Alcohol has been known to kill germs so I step up your game and kick that TB’s ass.

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  130. You don’t ever need to apologize. Many of us are right there with you in the “my immune system hates me and is destroying my body” camp. I have PsA, not RA, but I am one of the lucky few to have a severe form that is resistant to treatment. So my Rheum keeps pulling out all stops with different injections, infusions, and pills, then has to keep switching because lab wotk comes back saying my liver is dying, or my iron is nonexistent, or whatever else kind of bullshit side effect these medicines cause. So, not to be a downer, just trying to let you know I can relate and sending you hugs from across town.

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  131. Sending you extra hugs. Being sick sucks!

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  132. HUGS

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  133. if you get those “meat shredding claws” you can pretend you’re a bear while you eat those whole chickens. shifty eyes I’ve heard…

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  134. Your Cured – Ta Da !!!

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  135. When the ER nearly killed me by misdiagnosis my septic gallbladder as a panic attack and drug seeking, they also toggled the wrong answer for my TB status as positive. Which sent me in for a chest biopsy on top of nearly dying and taking two surgeries to get rid of the gallbladder and a third surgery to fuse the spinal disc that popped out when they had to rip the drains out that had meshed with my innards after having been in for so long.

    My point to this roundabout way of coming to it? Second test. Get one. Make sure someone didn’t toggle that switch to positive by accident.

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  136. gentle hugs so sorry you are dealing with all this crap.

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  137. jfc, you really pissed off those vampires, huh? (I originally wrote [then edited] “pissed ON the vampires, which would’ve also explained so much more)

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  138. Jenny, I am so sorry but that funny streak of yours will see you thru…no one prepares us for the little by little illnesses that you don’t necessarily notice when you’re young but then they all come together and WHAM, one step forward, two steps back…so frustrating and disheartening to feel like shit all the time. I will make a low-carb voodoo doll and fill her with pins for you…and drink vodka while I do it! Feel better ❤

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  139. Just please, please, please don’t take any health advice from Gweneth Paltrow
    Here’s a hedgehog video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fty5xF5Zw8A

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  140. 140
    Lisa McDermott

    You are an Amazon (not the giant shopping vortex) for putting up with this crap.

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  141. Careful of the supermarket precooked chicken. A lot of them have MALTODEXTRIN in them, which has a high glycemic index. That would totally undo any ground you’ve gained with the low sugar part of your diet. Better off cooking and mutilating a chicken from scratch.

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  142. I am so sorry you feel bad.. If it helps I have a laundry list of issues and it is overwhelming sometimes. Graves disease that led to hypothyroidism after they nuked my thyroid with radioactive iodine 20 years ago. Psoriatic Arthritis with no psoriasis.. Fibromyalgia. This of course has caused anxiety, depression and weight gain..Ive tried Whole 30, low carb, no gluten etc. There are days that I think holy shit… what else? And then I remember there could be a lot more..
    I have completely given a big FUCK YOU to dieting and all that it entails.. I am going to just love the body I am in, and be thankful for people like you that keep some of us going when we dont want to… Thank you for inspiring us Jenny. Keep your chin up and stay you!

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  143. Yeah I started getting big sugary carb cravings as soon as I quit alcohol. Turns out if you drink enough alcohol your body is tricked into thinking it’s getting cookies and cake.

    Liked by 1 person

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  144. I love you. That is all.

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  145. Would it make you feel any better if I sent you some good low-carb recipes? Or would that just be annoying?

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  146. Did you know that in the uk badgers have been blamed for carrying TB to farm animals/ all other animals but there’s been a new report/idea that it might be the foxhounds 🦊 that are the carriers infecting wildlife?
    See? It’s not all bad!
    i can’t hear you screaming la la la

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  147. i feel you, I had a giant ass tumor in my thyroid which was a pain in the ass (also benign) and I had to have my whole thyroid removed which caused me to lose weight than spiral into an eating disorder. thyroids are weird. cats are cool!

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  148. 148
    Brenda Julian

    Your story should be used in a commercial for Xeljanz or one of the other biological RA meds. More realistic than the happy women bouncing soccer balls and building playgrounds. It sucks wide and large that you have to go through this. I hope that you continue to improve 🙂

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  149. I can sacrifice a small plastic goat for you. I may have to wait until July 4th so it is not as noticable that I’m burning a small plastic goat. I’m sorry you have all the diseases. I think God must have messed up somewhere. On the other hand, I’m not sure God will approve of the plastic goat thing. Hmmm. Sometimes these problems can only be solved with lots of vodka.
    Take care, Jenny – things seem really sucky, but you’ve got lots of wonderful weirdos sacrificing strange things for you.

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  150. Lots of love to you, Jenny. Chronic illness is just so exhausting. Hope you find more happy moments amidst all this bullshit.

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  151. 151
    TaraDactyl

    You need to see a Reiki practitioner. Probably more than a few times. Maybe some smudging too. I have some homemade smudge sticks you can have.

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  152. My mom had tb as a child, and because i’m from her uterus we randomly test positive and freak people out. I wish I could wish you into better days so please know i’m wishing on that.

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  153. I can’t think of anything funny to say….I’m going in for a zillion tests because I actually feel pretty good…so since I’m stable-isa (my body, not my mind) I’m going to try to get even better. I know she is going to find some serious weird shit and is likely to put me on a diet of kelp and water…tepid tap water…not even a slice of lemon or a sprig of mint…

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  154. I’m sorry Jenny, and totally understand. I am now looking at whether to stop my monthly “anti-hormone” injection that helps ward off a recurrence of breast cancer.. because.. every time I get the injection, it triggers a Crohn’s flare-up. It really sucks to not only have my body be at war with the rest of me, but to have different factions of it being at war with each other – that’s a whole new level. These are impossible situations. I hope that you get a break, soon. And here’s to wholeness and kindness in our bodies.

    B/t/w, I just found Furiously Happy a few weeks ago, and it had me laughing and crying (in a good way) even though I was home-bound with a flare. I would love to write hilariously about Crohn’s the way that you write about your maladies, but I think I might just gross everyone out.. Anyway, thank you for your work.

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  155. I feel your pain. I am on the autoimmune disease roller coaster too. I fired the “specialist” because he refused to put me on NDT, which works for me! Synthroid sucked the fucking life out of me. Still searching for an amazing doctor who actually listens and gives a damn. Those seem to be non-existent. I have had excellent results with Autoimmune Paleo (AIP) diet. Taking Turmeric supreme supps for inflammation and a good probiotic. Selenium, magnesium, and just added Rhodiola Rosea for my anxiety and stress. Wishing you health and happiness!

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  156. Ah, yeah, that’s totally a FUCK moment. I’m so sorry. Go have more vodka if that helps. BTW, Clamato Bloody Mary’s are allowed on it if you don’t use too much juice, so you can rip the chicken to pieces and then pretend you are drinking the blood of your enemies as well.

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  157. I completely support your crying for as long as you feel necessary. That is absolutely horrible news. I hope you get some better news soon, of any kind, including ‘there’s a parade of kittens outside.’

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  158. Ah, that all sucks. I’m sorry your body is not cooperative. Blame your parents for poor genetics if it will help – that’s what I always do. 😦

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  159. Congrats on getting the consumption. I can’t wait to see this opera.

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  160. 160
    Cheryl Swayne

    I can see where the RA shots can make you sensitive to acquiring TB. I asked to have a test for a fungal infection that might be in my lungs, but was told no by the doctor b/c the test is the same as TB and it would show positive as fungus is carried through the air by spores. Then I would think something is wrong with me or that I have TB when I don’t. But for some reason, the fact that I haven’t been able to breathe for the past 8 years isn’t a problem for the doctor….

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  161. Hashimoto’s sucks! After having it for years, I finally had a doctor who recommended I try going 100% gluten free, since most of her patients with Hashimoto’s feel better that way. It actually helped! The adjustment to the diet was hard, but then I found all these great gluten free substitutes and it’s not bad at all now. Sundays used to be my worst feeling day, when my dear hubby would make delicious waffles full of gluten (before we knew my problems with it). Now he makes delicious gluten free waffles and my Sundays are just like other days. I’ve been gluten free for 2 years now and it has been really worth it in terms of how much better I feel. I’m not anti-gluten at all, if it didn’t make me feel bad I would be eating it right now! I just wanted to share my experience with you in case it could help you too. I’m so sorry you’re going through all this, you are a good person and don’t deserve to suffer.

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  162. OMG what a hassle but my Mom also has Hashimoto’s and has had the TB bacillus for a long time and she is in her 70s so you may be ok in the long run. And if I can rant a bit myself this has been a really tough day with screwups and things at work and a migraine and I am really, REALLY feeling stabby but like screaming also and I think that the world is after me SO I can really, REALLY relate to everything you are saying even though I don’t have the physical problems you have. Except not getting out of the house. I do that. Reluctantly.

    And now I think this is not making much sense so maybe you have infected me with some internet-crossing craziness bacillus. Oh well, could be worse.

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  163. Has anyone mentioned that you should get a second opinion on the TB test yet? Although I’m not a doctor, I do work in the medical field, as does my wife (therapists). We both have to get regular TB tests. Last year, hers was read as positive, and everyone assumed she had been exposed b/c she works with immigrants from unusual parts of the world. She works in a doctor’s office, and all of the nurses and doctors agreed, “yep, that’s a positive test.” So, they referred her to the County Health Department for the next steps. Fortunately, in our County, before they put people on preventative/cautionary antibiotics, they do another test. She had a similar reaction. The nurse reading the test this time explained that my wife was NOT having a positive reaction, however, but was allergic to the substance mixed with the TB solution–the carrier. So, she gave her ANOTHER test, this time with a different carrier solution. Sure enough, no reaction. So, now my wife gets this neat little letter in her medical file that warns that if she is given a TB test with this certain kind of carrier solution, she will get a false positive.
    This had never happened to her before, despite annual TB tests, so it can apparently develop over time. It’s something to look into/consider, particularly if your doctor is wanting to change your RA treatment, and your current regimen is working.
    Sorry for the long story, but if it helps in any way, I hope it is worth it! ❤ NLG

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  164. Cry, scream, throw things (ok soft things because we don’t want to break anything). Well maybe break a few plates… in the back yard… in a large barrel or bucket (easier cleanup) and you can use the pieces for a great art project. I call it Chaos Therapy. 🙂

    Virtual hugs! ❤

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  165. That is really hard news. I would panic if I had to change my meds after finding some that actually work without negative side effects. Sending you all the love!

    Like

  166. This book makes low carb so much easier

    the pizza crust made o’cheese is life altering.

    And Brazillian Cheese Bread http://www.rebootedmom.com/2016/11/19/super-easy-brazilian-cheese-puffs-gluten-free-grain-free/ keeps the real bread cravings at bay.

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  167. Omg. I just wanted to hug you reading that. But, I realized I might expose you to something I don’t even know I have and then I’d feel like a monster for adding to your burden. I’m supposed to be doing the low carb, low sugar thing. I can’t seem to manage it even a single day though. A meal or two, sure. But the whole day? That’s just too much. I hope you find something great for your RA. I suffer from joint pain as well and it sucks. You bring so much joy, laughter and encouragement to the world. I hope we can all do the same for you.

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  168. Fuck shit piss hell damn!

    Liked by 1 person

  169. That just sucks. 😦 All the way around. I can’t do low carb because I get very ill in ketosis… kinda like the “carb flu” but it never goes away. I’m glad of that, because I love bread and pasta, and can’t imagine going without it. 🙂

    I also have rheumatoid disease (PsA) and understand the TB fear. I used to be an ER nurse, and tested “inconclusive” for TB which my rheumy considered the same as a positive. But I knew without a doubt that I had never been exposed, and had been routinely tested when working ER. Come to find out you can get false positives and inconclusives if you’re on steroids when the blood is drawn for the test. I had to do 3 more blood tests and a chest X-ray to prove I didn’t have latent TB. So asking for a re-test from a different lab is not out of line.

    If you do in fact have latent TB, they have to clear it from your system before you can be on biologics, it’s true. It’s usually 12-18 months of TB treatment. But don’t let anyone tell you that your RA has to go untreated during that time. Even if you had poor or no results from non-biologic DMARDs in the past, they can try a different combination than you were on before, or a drug you’d never been on, to try and keep the inflammation and joint damage to a minimum.

    Huge hugs, and I really hope things get better for you soon!!

    Liked by 1 person

  170. Oh gosh- I am so sorry for all the bull crap you are going through! And, here i was full of self pity because every time i go to the hospital, i lose an organ. Perspecive- you gave it to me!

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  171. You probably tested a false positive for TB. I know this because my blood test came back positive for TB (needs for arthritis too) so the doctor said it’s probably a false positive so he sent me for more tests to confirm and those came back “not clear” so they did the TB test again and turns out that a) I don’t have TB b) there’s a high incidence of false positives in people with no known risk factors. The upside was during these weeks of being infected with TB it was a great excuse to cough on those who pissed me off…

    Liked by 1 person

  172. 172
    Pamela Jesse

    Oh Jenny. I have nothing funny to say to any of this, just a sincere “I’m sorry you’re going through so much shit and I hope the storm stops soon”.
    Sending love and all the healing thoughts I can, plus spoons 🥄 🥄🥄🥄🥄 to help you when you need them.

    Much love ❤️ ❤️❤️❤️❤️
    Pamela

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  173. Jenny-
    That is all a TON to deal with and you are doing an AMAZING JOB! We love you! I hope you feel better really soon—Super hugs!

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  174. MEATZA. Take some ground sausage (or other fave ground meat) roll it out into thin crust shape. Bake 375ish for ten mins on each side. Top with fave toppings – bake again for melts. Enjoy! Still not pizza but better than the other garbage people have been trying to pass off as pizza. Cauliflower? Really??? Barf.

    And otherwise sending hugs. I’m so so sorry you’re having to deal with all this shit right now.

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  175. 175
    Pamela Jessen (with an n on the end)

    Ps: if it helps Jenny, I apparently can’t even spell my own name properly!!!

    Like

  176. Jenny you are my HERO, FOR REAL! Besides the emotional shit you have to go through, all this physical stuff is horrific too! Thoughts, prayers, good vibes etc. to you and your family. You are the epitome of a STRONG WOMAN and you kick ass.

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  177. You are sad, and hearing nice things sometimes help with the sad so here goes.

    I applied for your coloring book when you asked us to make wishlists. A stranger on the internet bought me my coloring book and it made me cry and reminded me that there are little pockets of goodness in the world, no matter how dark things are, which I’m sure was kind of your goal.

    I was broke when I asked for the book. A few weeks later, I got an awesome job and suddenly wasn’t so broke any more and I bought 3 coloring books for friends of mine. One cheered up my Person, on the anniversary of her dad dying of suicide. Another one, who struggles with suicidal thoughts and feelings, sent me this a few weeks after she got hers: Thank you for this book. Today I wanted to die, for real. I spoke with some people as I always do who convince me I should live. I finished the book you have me and I loved it. There is a page that says circle one of these statements, it’s for celebration purposes. I circled “I’m still breathing”. Love you, and thanks again.

    Liked by 1 person

  178. I just read the most interesting article (despite being on goop) about the Medical Medium and Mystery Illness. It talks about how most all auto immune disorders like RA and Thyriod diseases are really stages of EBV. It might have information that could help you. http://goop.com/the-medical-medium-and-whats-potentially-at-the-root-of-medical-mysteries/

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  179. Low dose Naltraxone – find out if it might work for you. It’s been amazing for me. Also went through the fast course TB treatment “just to be safe” it was like being on house arrest.

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  180. Great googly-moogly, woman! I know that there are a lot of people who think that praying for people struggling with health issues is a waste of time because what they really need is medical care and assistance, but I’m gonna pray for you anyway because a) I have no medical knowledge to give you, and b) I’m pretty sure you could use all the help you can get right now.

    And maybe I’ll look up some links for creating charms and anti-hex bags, because yea. It really does sound like you’re cursed.

    On a more serious note, I really hope things turn around for you soon. And I REALLY REALLY hope that you end up on a treatment for your RA that is effective and also won’t give you TB because HOLY FUCK.

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  181. 181
    theladyh11

    Oh my love…I desperately wish whoever cursed you would just cut it out. I’m sure it must be completely exhausting getting bad news so often. But for the record, we will never get tired of hearing about your life…I only wish it was all good news, for your sake.
    If I could, I would send you a thousand baby goats to run through your house and cheer you up.

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  182. I’m sorry…my daughter is on (what I assume) to be similar meds that you take for your RA, but she’s on it for Crohn’s, and she has to get a PPD every year to make sure she hasn’t contracted TB because she’d have to stop her meds too if that happened. And that would be horrible, because her infusions are what are keeping her from living life curled in the fetal position with fevers and infections and related despair.

    I hope your dr. can get some of this straightened out for you soon. Know that you are loved and you have made such a big difference in my life when I needed it. Big hugs to you, Jenny!

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  183. Jenny,
    I hate that you’re part of this club – the “all my energy is spent on not dying” club. Otherwise known as one of the worst clubs ever. Just please know that you are not alone. There are those of us who understand these feels and who love you and the light you’ve shown in our lives. You are in my thoughts.
    Much love,
    Tracey

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  184. While I am sorry that you have Hashimoto’s — it explains so much… (mostly people feel like crap and never realize that it’s the Hashimoto’s causing it.)

    Mary Shomon’s website: https://www.verywell.com/mary-shomon-thyroid-disease-expert-3231467 is the “breakthrough” website for people with Hashimoto’s.

    PEANUT BUTTER helps! As does lots of animal fat (Bacon). Animal fat also helps the inflammation. Ref: https://dailyoccupation.com/2017/06/12/world-renowned-heart-surgeon-speaks-really-causes-heart-disease/

    Check out the Weston A Price foundation for some interesting commentaries on low carb diets:
    https://www.westonaprice.org/health-topics/recovery-low-carb-diet/

    (They say you need at least 100g a day to keep your thyroid healthy…)

    Also, the last paragraph in this research paper (https://cdn.intechopen.com/pdfs-wm/22371.pdf) states: “Progressive damage of thyrocytes leads to release of large amounts
    of autoantigen and triggers the inflammatory response. Own observations indicate a possible direct impact of plasma cells, lymphocytes and fibroblasts, since thyroids of Hashimoto’s thyroiditis patients exhibit close contact between the groups of lymphocytes, plasma cells and fibroblasts.” (That is: you feel like crap for no discernible reason due to the inflammation. So, keeping your inflammation low is key, however you do it.)

    So, continuing to reduce inflammation and to keep it low will help immensely over the long term. I still have bad days but I have very few very bad days. Desiccated thyroid hormone has helped a lot.

    See: https://stopthethyroidmadness.com/ for more information.

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  185. So sorry sweetheart! but Please keep up the diet – it will help very very much, my friend was diagnosed w Hashimoto and the diet changed her life! Also, please know you are loved by so many … you’ve changed my life in ways you’d never ever even suspect, I promise! when I write about it for my HuffPo column I will surely mention your influence xoxo

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  186. Hugs and good thoughts for you.

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  187. Some silliness to cheer you up.

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  188. 188
    Kate Campanic

    That really sucks. I know how you feel about autoimmune diseases, I have several, too. I hate how having one makes you more likely to have more. I hope you find some answers.

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  189. Boo. I waited 6 months to see a rheumatologist yesterday, and he was like “yeah, you have something autoimmune but I’m not sure what,” and put me on that diet plus 30 minutes of cardio a day. He doesn’t seem to bother much with diagnosis, but if I’m gonna feel like crap I want it to have a name. For now, I’m going with the Lorelei-inspired “haunted leg.”

    Get rid of that TB germ and feel better soon!

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  190. 190
    marymoo24

    So, first of all, I love you and want to someday meet you and maybe have babies with you (although I’m menopausal and I’m pretty sure you ain’t having more babies anytime soon), so I have no idea how that would work. Second of all, I so know how you feel with your body attacking you, and no matter what you do, it only gets worse. I have so many health issues, and I only get more as the months go on. I was just diagnosed with Crohn’s, which scares me and makes me cry, and I wonder why me because I already have pretty much every other health issue under the sun.

    It just doesn’t make any sense, and it’s so fucking unfair.

    Just know we all love you and are keeping all our digits, hairs and anything else crossed for you.

    xoxo

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  191. Geez, Jenny! You’ve been given TOO much to deal with. Enough, already. But you don’t need to stop sharing. We’re here for you.

    What amazes me about you (besides your ability to maintain a sense of humor) is that through it all, you’re still able to write. I get a bad headache, stub my toe or feel a little sleepy and decide writing would be too much of an effort. Heck, I could barely write this comment. It’s haaaaard……

    Liked by 1 person

  192. Oh Jenny, I’m so sorry. I’m a fellow RA warrior so I know how rough that part of your struggles can be. I don’t know what injectable you’re on but I’m on Enbrel. With it and supplements (Black Seed Oil, Fish Oil, Vitamin D) I’ve been able to go off all my other RA meds. But sadly it makes my immune system a great big cry baby so even a cold takes weeks/months to shake. It sucks having a body that is in constant self destruct mode. I hope they get you sorted out. And I hope you’ve got some sort of support group. My little one full of women with RA and other autoimmune issues has been a huge blessing. Hugs and love!

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  193. so. um. This makes my heart hurt for you. After all the positive, laughter, and general sense of peace you have brought back into my life I wish you all that and more. Regardless of what happens, you inspire to keep being as sarcastic and sassy as I naturally want to be even in times of hardship. You and your perseverance are just too amazing for words. Thank you for being you and always sharing. You are incredible

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  194. I love buying a roasted chicken from the supermarket and then taking it home and tearing it apart with my hands. The problem is I eat the whole chook in one go including the stuffing (which is not low carbohydrate/low sugar).

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  195. https://youtu.be/aI0euMFAWF8 — Jenny, you and Mr. Burns — Indestructible. Now go out and concoct some evil scheme! Wendi

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  196. 196
    Anonymous

    I’m a type 2 diabetic, have RA and also had the TB thing. They took me off the injections for 9 months while I took a whole bunch of other pills and then I started up the injections again. The problem now is that it seems the injections are messing with my A1C. I think I’ll join you in a vodka.

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  197. PS: I love tearing apart whole roasted chickens. I use the Reynolds cooking bags and a perfectly golden brown chicken is as easy as pouring a glass of vodka. And avoids any seasonings with crap in it from the grocery stores. And you can tell the person doing your shopping to get a roasting hen, usually they’re 7 to 8 pounds, and they have one of those red thingys that pop up when the chicken is done. Now I wish I had one in the oven! Last thing: yes, I’m old enough to remember watching Hee-Haw.

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  198. EVERYBODY will feel better six months after they’re dead. So why aren’t we all rushing into that??? I suppose because Death itself is okay…but DYING actually SUCKS. Or something. Anyway, just know that everybody that loves you is rooting for you (or is it routing?? I can never remember…but whichever it is, we are…and praying, unless that offends the atheists, then I guess we’re all just thinking positive good thoughts and trying to improve your karma…because Jenny, I think your karma hates you…)

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  199. 199
    Anonymous

    Jenny, although the story in Falsettos does not directly apply to you, Stephanie J Block’s mental breakdown in this video always cheers me up while also resonating with me. Enjoy and feel better! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jb_f_wMKiSA

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  200. 200
    Jill Himitsu

    I am on the low carb thing, too. You summed it up perfectly. Bacon, vodka, no carrots. 💋

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  201. 201
    Anonymous

    My dad has RA and has found some relief with an antibiotic regimen. Not a mainstream suggestion, but he eventually talked his doctor into letting him try it. It’s been the best (not perfect, of course) thing he’s tried over the years.

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  202. You can also crush up the pork rinds and use them like bread crumbs in recipes. Be careful of those carb-free candies, the side effects are anal leakage. Like you don’t have enough to cope with!

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  203. “I will probably feel my best after I’ve been dead for 6 months.”
    This reminds me of an actual conversation between my sister and her husband:
    “Where did you go today?”
    “To the cemetery to visit my dad.”
    “Yeah? How is he?”
    “He’s lost a lot of weight.”

    You have all my sympathy for all the awful medical crap you’re going through. I wish I could think of/offer something that would make any part of it better. It sounds like you need the bizarre superpower I seem to have; the ability to have any lab test performed always come back as ‘normal’. It’s an entirely useless power if you are trying to figure out what’s wrong with you, but since you have everything, you’d be able to use it to stay on the injections you need. I’m not sure how I acquired this superpower, or I would totally give you the secret.

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  204. 204
    Anonymous

    I also got Tb (I have an autoimmune disease). The treatment is not too bad, but does mean further restricting your diet, which sucks. But the good thing is that after you do the 6-9 months of Tb treatment you can go back to your old RA treatment. Hugs.

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  205. 205
    AinOakPark

    Sucks to be you. What really irritates me is how blithely doctors tell you what you must do, and not do, as if it’s all just a walk in the park. Like, just DO it, no problem.

    And friends, and I KNOW they say this because they LOVE ME and don’t want to see me DIE, act like it’s no big deal, and honestly, I want to point my spiteful finger at them and say shit like, “Why don’t you just lose the 40 pounds you need to lose so you’d be a lot healthier!?” or, “Well, if you didn’t SMOKE, and YES, I mean those effing “vapor” cigarettes too, we’d ALL be a lot happier (well, maybe not the person I pointing at, but everyone else) and healthier!” Like, you have vodka (lucky!) but I have been off of alcohol for 16 months (no cheating, either!) I had just found out that my gastroenterologist said my liver tests were pretty good, so I had a small (4 oz?) glass of champagne (my first alcohol in 16 months!) toasting friends celebrating their 43rd anniversary — 43 YEARS to the SAME PERSON! Who the hell does that anymore?! –(and to cheer my improved health) when my friend said, “you really think you should have that?” SUCKED THE FUN OUT OF LIFE!! Like all of a sudden I was going to turn into an alcoholic!? Okay, rant over.

    Sucks to be you. I feel your pain, or at least as much as I can relate to.

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  206. I wasn’t just thinking about asking to have my testosterone checked. Anything to find an answer to the crushing fatigue! My last doc diagnosed fibromyalgia, but I don’t buy it… yet. Hang in there!

    Like

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  207. 207
    Jenlauscher

    All of this. Yes. I was diagnosed with RA about a year ago. Ever since, I feel like every time I go in they’re trying to pin another disease on me to explain some other weird shit that’s cropped up. “OH…the triple therapy didn’t work?? Maybe it’s ankylosing spondylitis. Oh shit, look at that! Your hormones are all fucked up too. We need to out you on 3 other drugs for PCOS. But you can have one of them because you also have migraine disorder. …here’s some pills for the migraines.”
    I’m a dumpster fire of a human.

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  208. 208
    Anonymous

    I’ve been low-carbing it since last August (Keto), and once you get past The Flu Stage, it gets a lot better. Or it should. I have a host of health problems, including Osteo in my entire upper body and hands (let that be a lesson, kids…NEVER play violin), and the Keto helps a lot with inflammation. I’m glad your doctor is using the notion of food helping to combat some of the problems you’re having, and I hope you can find relief soon.

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  209. Get a second TB test. False positives are common. Don’t accept going off the meds that are helping you until you are SURE you have the TB bacteria. So sorry your health is shitty. Best wishes to you.

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  210. Oh Jenny. I want to say something witty but mostly, I just feel you. And those,chickens are fucking awesome! But better with fresh, southern biscuits. I’m sorry for adding that. I didn’t mean to make you sad.

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    ReallyLoriRose recently posted I question the legitimacy of this piece of writing..

  211. Jeebus, Jenny. Have you considered sealing yourself into a bubble? Speaking of which, next time you’re sad, watch the movie Bubble Boy. Not the sad and awful John Travolta one, but the insanely happy one with Jake Gyllenhaal (how the hell do you spell that???). It’ll help. I promise.

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  212. My doctor is putting me on the low carb/low sugar diet and i may have a full breakdown. I’ve had a bad year and the thing that’s helped me is pizza. I’m so going to miss pizza. Also you need to stop collecting diseases. You and my mom are like disease hoarders leave some for the a** holes of the world. Much love and I hope things go well soon. Keep posting about it I’m rivited to the store.

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  213. Yikes, lady. 🙁 Here’s hoping the low carb diet does not also make you cranky enough to throat punch all of the people who will inevitably claim that essential oils/salt lamps/coffee enemas/avocados will cure you.

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    jeccav recently posted Suckered by a Candy Cult.

  214. I’ve been trying very hard to get diagnosed with RA just so that my doctor can TRY something (anything) to help me feel better. Apparently I’m not high enough in the spectrum for it to rate worthy of being labeled RA. Meanwhile I wake up every morning basically manually uncurling my fingers just to get going. So, I know how you feel………………..it sucks.

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  215. Mommy had undiagnosed Chronic Fatigue for over 40 years (well, it was diagnosed in the last ten or so), and oft complained that she was sick and tired of being sick and tired, as well as sick and tired of complaining about it. Vicious circle, that sick and tired business.

    I’m currently on a juice cleanse, which is, in effect, a diet of not chewing, but also no beverages other than water or water pulled outta plants. I really want to lose about twelve pounds and clear up my rashy skin and raccoon eye circles. So far (11 days of 30), I’ve shed ~4 pounds? and none of my other “symptoms” are resolving, and I REALLY WANT TO CHEW SOMETHING!

    I’m sorry you’re now a Doc Holliday carrier, or something. I sincerely hope you start feeling better soon.

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  216. 216
    MrsSteelToe

    You are so unbelievably strong. I know it may not feel that way but I would have already given up on myself by now and OD on Pizza, Beer and Jelly Bellys by now. Keep fighting! You are worth it!!! And at least there is Vodka 🍸

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  217. Sorry about the TB and everything else. Happy about the vodka.

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  218. 218
    Anonymous

    I know you’re probably sick of hearing “have you tried…?” because you’ve probably tried everything. But my mom just tried Charlotte’s Web hemp oil. Totally THC free, totally legal here in Texas (because it’s hemp, not cannabis). It has been a miracle worker for her. Might be worth a shot. Hell, what have you got to lose?

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  219. My evil liver doctor put me on a low-carb high-fat (LCHF) diet. I’ve been using dietdoctor.com (no affiliation, no kickbacks) and have really liked the recipes so far. It’s pretty easy to use the recipe finder and it will automatically adjust the number of servings and make a shopping list. Even my husband and kids have liked (or at least tolerated) everything so far.

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  220. Doc Holiday with a vagina? That’s FUCKING AWESOME!! Seriously, this absolutely sucks. But, you will definitely get the Following My Doctor’s Orders gold star (give or take the vodka)! I’m glad you at least feel a little better, and I hope they can resolve your meds and the TB. Dying of consumption like Camille sounds romantic, but let’s give it a hard pass. Hugs

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  221. 221
    Anonymous

    My heart is with you. You are brave and strong, especially when you feel weak.

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  222. I have Hoshimoto’s and other autoimmune stuff too. If you want to find very good information as well as a cookbook check out http://autoimmunewellness.com/ The cookbook will 100% fit the diet your doctor put you on. Also if you don’t have an Instant Pot you should get one. You can cook really healthy meals so quickly with that.

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  223. Not sure you will read this considering you have soooooo many comments 🙂 But I have recently started Low Carb/High Fat and found some of the facebook groups great for little tips like yours with a whole roast chicken. Here is another, instead of taco shells put grated parmesan cheese on baking paper and microwave for 1 minute, then gently fold into shape and hold until it sets. Or if you get impatient just start loading up your taco mixture and kind of hold it around it. Also look up garlic parmesan cheese knots – delicious and made with almond meal. And no sugar no grain salted caramel cheesecakes by low carb yum. OMG!!

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  224. I spent the past 5 days at a mindfulness & kindfulness meditation retreat. I went because I was feeling frustrated about my mental & physical illnesses & with myself and my life in general and just wanted to find a smidgen of inner peace (ha! I like to aim high). One of the practices we did a lot of was offering up “loving kindness” to ourselves and others, which is basically sending wishes/good vibes to be safe, healthy, at ease in the world, and at peace. It sounds hokey, but it’s oddly moving, and insightful: offering loving kindness to my self turned out to be surprisingly hard, which made me realize I’ve been blaming myself, angry with myself, for being ill. WTF?When we got to “people who have helped us or inspire us”, you were the one I thought of immediately, because your books and blogs have helped me & inspire me more than you can know. Funny thing is, you were on my mind throughout the whole retreat — not just during that part. So much on my mind that I wanted to check your blog to see if anything was going on, but we were in silence which means no talking outside of the sessions/classes, no phone, no internet … etc. (which also sounds hokey, and was uncomfortable at first, walking by people, sitting beside people and not saying ANYTHING, not even “bless you” if they sneezed — which a lot of us were doing because it’s allergy season and was incredibly windy and we were beside a meadow and a hay field with fluffy stuff blowing everywhere — but the silence became oddly soothing and created a feeling of close community as time went on which is strange on its own but ever more so since it happened WITHOUT VODKA or alcohol of any kind (my usual social anxiety buster), but that probably would have killed the silence thing once the drunk giggling set in). Anyway, once back in the world I read your blog, hoping that my spidey-senses were just messed up and nothing was wrong. I’m so sorry about this latest news. You have every right to feel sick and tired — don’t apologize for feeling that way or sharing how you feel. I hope they find you new treatments that work for your RA. In the meantime, vodka. And I’m sending some loving-kindness your way: May you be safe; may you be healthy; may you be at ease in the world; may you be at peace.

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  225. I have Hashimoto’s and a few related complications, and I’ve been eating low-carb for two years, culminating in zero sugar/very low carb for about 5 months. I’m found some other things that have helped with some symptoms too, but after a bunch of doctors and medication changes and a lot of “eh, this isn’t gonna kill you so you’re on your own”, this low-carb approach has been the single most helpful thing. Even though I really, really didn’t want to do it. I kept telling everyone that everything I like is a carb. But I can tell you that (hopefully, knowing every case is different) the improved feeling will continue! I had such extreme fatigue, mental fogginess and depression that I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life barely able to drag myself out of bed for 8 hours a day for work, lying dazed in bed the rest of the time, and I was willing to try anything, even NOT eating french fries.

    I still want french fries, but after about the four-month mark, I started wondering if I really like all the things I’ve been sort of socialized to like… my tastebuds have adjusted and “healthy” foods I never thought I liked taste better. More importantly, though, I feel MUCH better. I can think and move and enjoy things again. I really, really hope for the same for you. ALL the support and love sent your way! ❤ ❤

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  226. I hate being sick and tired of sick and tired. I feel ya. Please don’t die yet, I really enjoy your creative work.

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  227. 227
    Lois Ellis

    Have Hashimotos too. Also Crohns disease so I have to poo a lot, but barely the energy to get to the bathroom!!. I take steroid for my Hashimoto”s and they tell me my numbers are good, but the fatigue sometimes is sooo bad. Sorry for your troubles. Real low carb diets seriously mess with your head. Hope you get some relief!!

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  228. OK WTF, how in the world can there be more wrong?! I am starting to think that maybe your doctor hates you and is punishing you with this diet. You need a vacation…but not to a third world country because with your luck it may kill you.
    Know that we are NOT sick of hearing about it, we are your friends and friends weather the storm no matter what. Hang in there!

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  229. This book has helped me with so many health issues:
    HOW NOT TO DIE by Dr. Michael Greger

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  230. You’re going to be okay. Hashimoto’s is treatable. Your doctors sound like they are working hard to get you better and it’s going to suck really hard for a while, but you’ll be fine. You’ll make it. Having a bunch of random ass diseases doesn’t define who you are, and freaking out about it is exactly the healthy thing to do. At least that’s what the psychologist says. Hey, maybe they can combine all the shit that’s wrong with you and give it a new name, like Badass Motherfucker Syndrome. Or similar.
    Love you.

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  231. I have absolutely no idea what to say to this, but that’s never stopped me before. I’m sorry for all that f this suckage. Are you certain this isn’t somehow Victor’s fault? Just checking because husbands.

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  232. I have Hashimoto’s. It’s amazing that I’m on a higher dosage of synthroid than my husband, who doesn’t even have a thyroid. (He had cancer and had it removed.) When my levels are off, I can tell- joint pain, extreme fatigue, scalp psoriasis, rapid weight gain. I’m so sorry you have that PLUS a bunch of other stuff. 😦 I hope the low carb/low sugar works and that it gets better.

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  233. This may be obvious and you may have addressed it but … are they treating your Hashimoto’s? It’s easy enough to treat but if not treated can cause all kinds of horrible things. I speak from great experience. It’s simple hormone replacement, one pill a day. Still can’t eat carbs though. Hang in there.

    (From what I understand I can’t take hormone replacement because of my anticardiolipin syndrome? Something about it causing blood clots or strokes or something. I honestly get confused after so many diagnoses. But I’m taking a thyroid supplement with selenium and a lot of vitamins in it. ~ Jenny)

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  234. sends sooooooo many hugs Every time I read about your health issues I wonder how any one person can have so many. It’s, like, just epically unfair. I’m sorry that you have to deal with all this.

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  235. Much love, Jenny. Here’s to finding an alternative to your current RA meds and NO MORE DISEASES! I am feeling you on the “let’s just stop being sick for a little while because it sucks”. I even begged to go back to work because I am getting so bored at home and working outside in the summer in Texas is preferable. That’s how bored I am.

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  236. I have Hashimoto’s as well. I did start feeling better once I started taking thyroid hormone. And, the low carb, low sugar diet is the only one that has allowed me to lose weight. Good news is that there will be a turning point where you can tell the diet is making a difference. It will actually be hard to eat stuff with a lot of sugar. I am not saying that it is easy. I slip back into eating too much bread and sometimes too much sugar. But you can get to a point where feeling good is better than eating those things. Thinking of you and sending energy vibes.

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  237. Gah I am so sorry. This sounds like the shittiest thing ever and I really am sorry you have to go through it. D:

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    mommatrek recently posted Nolites te bastardes carborundorum.

  238. I have to admit that I didn’t read all the comments, so I don’t know if anyone else recommended it, but have you considered Moringa for your RA? It’s supposed to really help with the pain and swelling, and I don’t think there are any contraindications for other meds. You can buy it on Amazon as a loose herb, but I strongly recommend getting it in a capsule…it tastes like shit. I don’t play a doctor on TV, so check with yours before you start it, but I know a lot of people it has helped a lot!
    Much love,
    Jen

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  239. Jenny, I wish I could give a solution to your problems. I am just sitting here slack jawed for you. I hope your humor never leaves you. Somehow you’ve made me laugh through your pain. Where the heck is Dr House when you need him?? Just put cheese on everything. At least it’ll taste better.
    Jen

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  240. I have Hashimoto’s also. Diagnosed 15 years ago. All of my problems seem to stem from that, really and it is stupid. I AM SUPPOSED TO BE on the same diet you are to get my system cleared out (surreeeeee), but I can’t because I will just starve to death, while drinking water and staring at the people eating stuff I love. That being said, do they have you on a thyroid supplement? Because…seriously, that would get rid of a bunch of your symptoms and WHY did your doc not tell you about this??!!! It’s kind of a big deal.

    Good luck, your diet makes me sad and my daughter has Crohn’s and my worst fear is that one of her tests will show the TB thing and she will not be able to get her infusions. Ugh. Hopefully medical marijuana makes a go of it here soon.

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  241. I am on a diet too – and it sucks balls. However, my mom likes to give me eating advice (stop eating and I will lose weight) but I have to argue with her because I like not dying (type 1 diabetic). And my cousin, who is a dietician, put me on this diet so I’m kind of thinking she might know a smudge more than my mom. Wow, I’m sorry to turn this into a bitchfest about my mom, having autoimmune crap sucks. (Celiacs, arthritis, fibromyalgia, asthma and diabetes.)

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  242. Don’t apologize! I really feel for you. I also have an autoimmune disorder and they just wreak havoc on you. I have to give myself injections or else I’m in crippling pain. Mine is psoriatic arthritis. Thinking of you and wanting you to know you’re not alone! 💕

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  243. 243
    Anonymous

    Hey. Yup. I am one of your multi-disease discount friends on-line. First it was hypo-thyroidism (incl, but not limited to, Hashimoto’s Disease), then I was dx with fibro and osteo-arthritis, then we graduated to a real stinker called Type 1 Diabetes and the next year it was “chronic autoimmune hepatitis” (doesn’t have an A,B or C nor is it bloodborne), three years ago it blossomed into Lupus (SLE) and just this last year I got dx with a heart murmur that probably is caused by the SLE hitting on my heart. I live in Southern Oregon and I am “this close” to trying the high CBD Cannabis Oil (for joint issues and inflammation)…it’s available here at PET STORES … since it doesn’t have any THC (the stuff that makes one high) it is safe for pets and can be applied and ingested by folks like us on a heck of a lot of meds! Due to the liver issues (et al), I don’t take ANY pain meds nor steroids (similar to your infusions/shots) so basically I take a version of a chemo (Imuran) and anti-malaria medicine (Plaquenel) to try to suppress my immune system from killing any more organs. Yeah, I “get” you…I feel like crap a lot. It’s totally been suggested that ANYONE with autoimmune issues should be on a ketogenic diet plan…sort of like Paleo where zero grains are eaten and it’s high in high quality meat(s)/protein, good fats and very low in carbs. I tried a very limiting version of it a couple years ago…like only 1,000 calories a day and felt very faint ALL DAY LONG. I think I just needed more of everything….but I did lose weight and other than having low glucose A LOT, I felt better (whatever that is). Please feel free to send me any questions….I have done a ton of research and know what SHOULD be done to help people like us….best of luck on this endeavor we call “life!”

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  244. I selfishly want you to get better because you make MY life better. The joy I get from reading your words makes me want you around for a long, long, long time — and HEALTHY!!! So I send you virtual hugs and chicken soup (no noodles, of course, but lots of chicken chunks). And I’ve been trying to make myself eat low carb, no sugar… and if you can do it, so can I!!! (I hope. Since I’m doing it voluntarily it’s even harder. Because bread is delicious.)

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  245. Oh man. I have two kinds of autoimmune arthritis, one of which started when I was living and working in East Africa (I was in the Peace Corps) and during that same period of time I also tested positive for TB. My chest X-ray was negative but I still had to take 9 months of INH and Pyridoxine to put the TB bacteria into remission as much as possible (this was in 1999). Long story short I have been on all those RA injections and it never brought my TB back. I’m on methotrexate now. If there is any way you can take the TB meds for 6-9 months (provided your X-ray comes back clean–not sure if this option is still viable if you have it actively in your lungs) you WILL be able to take those injections after you complete the course. So don’t lose hope–there are options still. I just don’t think rheumatologists have a lot of experience with patients who also have a positive PPD (my initial doctor didn’t and he had to consult with an infectious disease specialist). When they switched me to injections he thought he would have to start me back on the INH again to keep myself from going into active TB but the infectious disease guy said no. Yay? It was just a less shitty scenario. Please feel free to contact me with any questions–it’s hard to find someone who has already been down this cray-cray path so I’d be more than happy to talk.

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  246. 246
    Anonymous

    Hi
    I read and love your blog.
    I read and loved your books.
    I am grateful for what you provide to the world.
    Thanks and I am praying for you.

    Like

  247. We love the roasted grocery store chickens. We even refer to them as “Rip-Apart Chickens.” (I should probably trademark that.)

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  248. Have you ever thought about seeing a Naturopath? You might benefit from one.

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  249. 249
    Anonymous

    So sorry to hear about your health struggles… sending lots of healing thought your way. At least you can still have vodka!

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  250. 250
    Anonymous

    The good news is that you are VERY well loved! If you ever come to speak in Denver – we have the amazing Tattered Cover Bookstore where you can come speak! – you will find more of your adoring public, and though we may (mostly) be insane, we all wish you the best of luck with your doctors! What I wish for you is that you find a HOST of side effects of the drugs and treatments – that they’re cancelling each other out forever! Stay well, sweet lady, we’re all rooting and putting in a good word to the Universe for you!

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  251. You know, Jenny, I broke down at my doctor’s office a few months ago. I’ve been dealing with depression, high blood pressure, anxiety, hypothyroidism, and now ADHD and a little plantar fasciitis for kicks. I told him I felt like I’m falling apart. My issues are obviously different from yours, but I get it. It just feels like you finally get one thing under control, then you get hit with another. It sucks, but we’re here for you to vent. Much love, sweetie–it’s going to be ok. And if you haven’t discovered Halo Top ice cream, it might be a godsend for that rotten diet you’re on. Check into it!

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  252. I read that you were eating humans wrapped in lettuce, which might be tasty, I guess, but that’s probably how you got your prison TB, isn’t it?

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  253. I’m so sorry you’re having such a hard time. Doctors are jerks!! I’ve been lucky enough to find a couple really good ones. Not because I fired a whole bunch of them along the way or anything…..cough Ahem, anyways!

    I comment like twice a year because I’m just a natural lurker but when you said you couldn’t get your RA shots anymore I thought I should chime in with my recent awesome! I have Osteo, not RA (though my body is an asshole so you know…..never say never) but at 27yrs old even just with Osteo I already have significant degeneration and damage in many places due to my health issues. When I recently complained to my doctor that every time I moved my back I was serenaded with the sounds of rice krispy cereal and my hips were in so much pain I could no longer sleep on my sides, her solution was to give me a prescription for pain meds because there just wasn’t much she could do about Osteo damage. Yeah……Give the girl with severe chronic pain issues from multiple health problems a bottle of pain killers…..cause you know….no one has ever seen how that story ends!!! Um, no thank you.

    Most people take supplements with things like glucosamine but I have a severe shellfish allergy so no bueno, and my whole family is allergic to sulfates so those are a no go too. My mom was doing some research to try and find another alternative and came across Gelatin. It takes several months of build up before it actually makes much of a physical difference in your joints, but because of it’s anti inflammatory properties and other good effects it’s almost an immediate gentle relief. People take it all kinds of ways; putting it in water to make a jello, adding it to food etc. I bought Beef Gelatin Capsules because I’m horrible at remembering to take things regularly unless they’re in my pill box. It hasn’t even been a full three weeks yet and already I can sleep on my side and my back only does it’s snap crackle pop routine in the mornings. I’m really excited to see how much of a difference there is in a few months once my joints should actually be a little healthier. It can’t stop my body from being an asshole but it should help lessen the damage. I did a little research just to make sure before I suggested this but gelatin IS in fact also beneficial for RA as well.

    I would seriously suggest giving it a try! arthritis sucks and I know how much it sucks the life out of you some days when you can’t bring yourself to do anything because it hurts. Even if the docs find a good alternative for your shots, I would still really recommend you try taking gelatin and see if it makes any difference. I don’t think I’ll ever stop taking it!!

    I hope you feel better soon and they figure out what all’s going on with you ❤

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  254. 254
    Amanda Webb

    Lately I’ve been buying copies of You Are Here for people in pain, but that wouldn’t cheer you up as much as it did them. I really wish I could send you a happy playful present.
    I am starting TMS in July. I had only heard about it when it was new, before I’d tried so many medicines. I have a heart problem that would “rule out” a lot of psych meds, only they’re the next thing, the only thing, left. I need to feel better, even if there is a long term cost. But thanks to your post about TMS I did all the research and can try that instead. My Psychiatrist isn’t familiar with it, so it wouldn’t have come up without your post. I just think that’s kind of an awesome ripple you made. Hopefully you think so too.

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  255. 255
    Amanda Guthrie

    Damn girl! I could just lift that there curse for you…..
    Or make a voo-doo doll and pamper it! Haha. I have no idea how that works….really!

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  256. I had full-blown TB when I was younger, and was on meds for 2 years. It sucked, but was manageable with meds. I hope you’re just a carrier, but either way you will kick it square in its taint! ❤❤ and happy health thoughts to you!

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  257. You might want to take a look at “The Paleo Approach – Reverse Autoimmune Disease and Heal Your Body” by Dr. Sarah Ballentyne. She suffered from it herself and was able to put it in remission.

    This is not a “woo-woo” weird diet. It’s an eating plan with real foods and serious science behind it. The book is well-written and extensively sourced. It’s written so both a layman or someone who likes full scientific and biological explanations can understand it (not an easy feat). It’s all full referenced.

    Check out her website here. Lots of info, even without getting the book: https://www.thepaleomom.com/books/the-paleo-approach/

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  258. Ugh. Hate that you’re one of those TB warnings you hear about on all the commercials for biologics. I’ve failed my fourth one, so after my ne k issues get sorted out I’m going to have to switch types and go to one that involves spending the day hooked up to an infusion pump, jacked up on steroids and benedryl.

    I really hope your doc comes up with something for the RA because unmediated RA doesn’t even approach sucky. It so much less than sucky I’m not sure there are words bad enough to describe it

    Gentle hugs and lots of roasted chickens.

    P.S. – put sirachi saurce on it. You can pretend it’s blood and have a more realistic Godzilla moment.

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  259. I am so sorry. It is awful to be so sick and tired all of the time. And then the treatments are almost worse than he diseases. Until you can’t have the treatments anymore, and then it’s even worse. You so don’t deserve this. (No one deserves this, but you extra-don’t-deserve it because you’ve brought so many of us laughter when we were in our own awful medical places.) Sending hugs (I don’t care about the TB!) and much hope that things look up soon.

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  260. I love you Jenny. I’m sorry this is happening.

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  261. The low carb diet was ok, I don’t eat much bread anyway and found some wraps that are actually pretty good. The TB is not unusual, we usually just fight it off with a healthy immune system. You just don’t have the immune system to do so and the meds you are on for your RA put you at increased risk. I’m so sorry you are having so many troubles. I understand about not listening to your doctors because they just find more diseases. I quit going to mine because they just find something else wrong. Hang in there, Jen, we love you and can’t live without you!!

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  262. 262
    Karen Vollmar

    I did that diet for two months and lost weight. I also felt a lot better. But then I fell so far off the wagon that I can’t see it anymore. I like my vodka citrus or peach flavored with sweet tea. Maybe vodka is a chronic pain/arthritis thing. I’m bummed you have yet another ducky disease, but hang in there. I’d miss you if you quit blogging.

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  263. What can we do for you? You give us so much… how can we boost you up? What do you need?mi

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  264. Well, shit. I knew we had a lot in common, but damn I didn’t want to share that with you, too! Do you take snythroid or armour? They can have SUPER different results for folks with Hashimotos. And, be sure your endocrinologist dies more than work with diabetes patients! Those jerks think all thyroid disease is the same, but autoimmune thyroid disease is a whole other ball of fucking hot wax😒 I really hope you’re feeling well soon. This spring/summer has been full of bad vibes and germs😷🤒🤕

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  265. Fuck is right. I have Hashimotos, too. Be sure your endocrinologist does mo’re than work with diabetes patients because those jerks think all thyroid disease is the same. Autoimmune thyroid disease is a whole different ball of hot, nasty wax! Do you take snythroid or armour? Big difference between the two, I’ve found. Be well, and keep sharing – Hashimotos SUCKS😐

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  266. 266
    Anonymous

    I’m really sorry. Chronic illness is a cruel curse. You’re always hilarious though

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  267. 267
    Anonymous

    Well, just shit. So sorry to read this. Get well soon.

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  268. 268
    Catherine

    My dad had tuberculosis as a child and has the most severe case of RA anyone has seen. He can only use Retuxin so he can walk with a walker. All other RA medicines cause reactions for him and he had to hav things to help him use Retuxin. Just FYI for you and doctor.

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  269. Hey there. I’m sorry you’re not feeling well and can relate. I was recently diagnosed with Hashimotos. When the doctor’s office called to tell me why I was losing my mind, the receptionist told me about my thyroid levels and how I was in the range of Hashimotos. I said, “What is that? And do I need chop sticks?” I went back on Weight Watchers to cut back on sugar and carbs. Waaaaaahhhhhhh! Good luck with your diagnosis. I’m reading The Root. Not sure what to think at this point. This autoimmune disease can go kick rocks!

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  270. Hmm, is there any possibility of changing doctors? Yours seems really…well. Not on the ball with the whole compassion and humanity aspect, and she’s treating a human being. You are not your conditions and her blaming you for things going wrong is just ridiculous.

    I’m a type one diabetic and I’ve had numerous endocrinologists treat me this way, it takes a ton out of you. Now that I’ve switched to one who’s working with me instead of at me, I feel so much better in general. i was on the low carb low sugar and just couldn’t do it, new endo agrees that it’s incredibly limited and that balance is the key, not cutting things out.

    You’re strong for dealing with all this, and I’m really sorry you’re getting such bad care.

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  271. This sucks. Crying, flailing and running amok are healthy. Please don’t ever feel like you need to apologize for anything, except, maybe, spilling vodka on one of your furbeasties. Waste of vodka and annoys the furbeast.

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  272. Chances are good that the TB is dormant. When I tested positive (40 years ago), the medical folks told me that they expect everyone over a certain age to have come in contact with it. (BTW, if they didn’t tell you, after testing positive, you can never have the TB test again. So there’s that (something on the bright side?).) Hang in there and know how many people care ❤

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  273. So sorryJenny..hang in there and know “I’ll be your huckleberry”

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  274. So sorryJenny..hang in there and know “I’ll be your huckleberry”

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  275. You should always refer to it a “consumption”. It’s more romantic.. Also, drink more absinthe–it’s great for consumption.

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  276. Sending you hugs, Jenny. Don’t mind the mask. #friendlygermaphobe

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  277. I have been reading your books and found your recent post. I understand your food pain. It has helped me to laugh in my hard times. I know this is all part of life but it’s still sucks. Went to dr. Who said you can’t eat it if is is below ground or is grain. Which I think leaves out vodka…. and pizza …and pasta and cheese (no dairy) trying to find d reason to live without wine and ice cream.

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  278. I’m so sorry you are having to deal with all of this. I try really hard to be healthy and when I get even a little sick or an injury I get so mad at myself thinking WTF is the point in putting in all of this work to stay healthy just to still end up feeling like S**T sometimes?!
    And that’s a teeny, tiny sliver of what you are dealing with every day with everything you are battling. I’m sorry.
    You are a soldier, and you are inspiring that you find the will to keep going and keep trying.
    Thank you for being here ❤

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  279. Hashimoto’s, scleroderma, multiple sclerosis AND positive TB going on 20 years or so. Bodies suck. But we kind of need them to digest ice cream and pizza. Fair trade. 😁

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  280. Sending you so much love. I just want you to know how much you inspire me. I thought today was the worst day a person could have but there are a lot of us going through horrible things but what sets you apart is that you can make me laugh. Your humor in the face of illness is so awesome and I just want you to know that my life is better because of you. Sending healing vibes. 💜💙💜

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  281. 281
    Datdamwuf

    I feel it, I too am sick and tired of being sick and tired. More, I’m tired of explaining it to my boss and coworkers and wondering if I’ll keep my job, my house and my insanely cool cats

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  282. 282
    Anonymous

    Shit. We love you Jenny.

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  283. Seriously… get off the crazy train. You are badassery… There is nothing wrong with you. You are just like the rest of us.

    Everyone is failing and falling and furious and fighting….

    Embrace it.

    And then it won’t be a fight

    Namaste…

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  284. I have Hashimoto’s disease too. When my doctor told me so, I said, “Well at least I don’t have a goiter,” and he said, “You do have a goiter.” At least it’s not one of those giant grapefruit goiters, I say quietly to myself to avoid any further revelations.

    So sorry your feeling bad.

    Me and my wee goiter

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  285. “I’m your huckleberry.” Mmmm Tombstone and Val Kilmer Doc Halliday. If you’re going to develop full blown TB, start collecting Antique handkerchiefs with strawberries and cherries embroidered along the edges ( disguises the blood spatter).

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  286. Good hot greasy grief, woman… you sure are taking the full brunt of that curse! Pretty much everyone has already said sorry you’re going through this. I wouldnlike to say the same, but I want to also say I’m way more original than that. So instead, let me say this:

    F**k anyone that tells you vodka is not a food group. They’re agents of the devil.
    The awful stuff like this, besides simply itself being awful, is also useful because what I’ve seen from you is that you shine brightest when you’re going through something hard. Your honesty, transparency, and ability to make fun during pretty much anything is what keeps us all reading and helps us through our own issues.
    I’m hoping that prompts you to write a mock cookbook for your weird diet, one which has normal pictures of food in it and stuff, but the ingredients list really is just for a cocktail that you think would go great with the photos. And the instructions would hopefully be a string of random thoughts and anecdotes that barely relate to goddamn meatloaf. That would be funny. Especially if it was a carrot recipe. And I would buy the living hell outta that.

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  287. 287
    Anonymous

    So sorry about all the health crap you’re going through. It totally ducking sucks. Know we’re with you.

    Like

  288. 288
    Barbara in Colorado

    The person who posted the “heal yourself with your mind” sounds an awful lot like someone I know. I have to repeatedly remind myself not to shoot her.

    Like

  289. We are an autoimmune disorder family as well. Hashimotos. Slope is. Psoriasis. No RA but those thanks, at least the last three, are closely related. All no doubt exacerbated by stress. I did a bunch of phototherapy for awhile for psoriasis, didn’t make a dent. When Humira came out I was prescribed it… only to find out my copay ALONE was llike $7000 a year! Obvi I couldn’t afford. Anyways, a few months ago I was visiting a relative with a hot tub and spent a fair amount of time in there. Alla sudden, psoriasis diminished by ca 75%.Was it the heat? The chemicals? The relaxation? I guess my point is, some drugs/treatments/whatever help lots of people but not everyone (or cost so freakin much or interfere with other meds/conditions) that they aren’t an option. But, something else or unexpected may be the answer for you. (Isn’t that how Post-its were invented?) stay hopeful.

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  290. *Alopecia not slope is

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  291. 291
    Anonymous

    I am sorry you got bad news, and I hope you get much better.

    Like

  292. Ooohhh girl!!! HUGS HUGS HUGS! That just sucks — the TB, the diet, the lack of your meds — like come on karma! Jenny is AWESOME and she deserves a BREAK. I mean come on! I am so sorry. And also – my body does not do well with sugar at all and I try to follow the low FODMAP diet, which basically takes away the meaning of life. So whenever I start feeling a bit better, I start drinking wine again. And well, that doesn’t work that well. So then I have to stop the wine, try to get a bit better again, and then I bring back the wine, and so the circle goes. Because what kind of a person would I be if I just gave UP on wine. I mean really??? I need to at least try. I am a loyal person.

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  293. In all seriousness you sound like you have been suffering a long term infection related to ticks. Lyme with coinfections toons left untreated cause many of the ailments you describe. The Lyme tests are only 15% accurate so it’s a clinical diagnosis for that but blood work with show lots of latent viruses and other fungal and bacterial infections reeking havoc because of the immunosuppressive outcome. I would seriously look too it. Believe me I know I’ve lived it.

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  294. Sending you a great big cyberhug because that’s all I can do. I’m on methotrexate, Cimzia injections and turmeric for RA; and epidural steroids for osteoarthritis of the spine, and every other part of my body that bends. Since my immune system is basically non existent, a cyberhug is all I can do. If I had your address, I could send you a quilt.

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  295. Oh, Jenny. :’-( I have nothing new to suggest. Just wanted to let you know I feel your pain and frustration. I’m about to have repeat shoulder surgery because the first one “failed.” And I’m waiting for lab work to come back from the Mayo Clinic to tell me whether I have the rare disease I suspect I have, or whether we keep looking for a diagnosis. Also on weird restrictive diet, although different from yours. DH calls mine the “air and distilled water” diet. And I’m having allergic reactions to fragrances, so I can’t really be out in public anymore. I could go on, but it’s not really about me – it’s about you. Hope your voodoo curse is lifted very soon!!! Much love from the trenches ❤ ❤ ❤

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  296. 296
    Sherry Zorzi

    I have psoriatic arthritis. Almost identical to RA except you get the extra added bonus of psoriasis. I was on first Humira and then Enbrel at TWICE the normal frequency. Still had 24/7 pain and lived on Tramadol. After 6 years, my rheumy said I’d probably never see a remission, that I was probably as good as it was going to get. That very day, I finally listened to my friend who’d been saying for years I needed to eat whole food, plant based. Within 4 months I had lost 30 pounds and was in remission. That was over 4 years ago. I will eat this way forever. Weight still off, still in remission. More energy than I had 20 years ago. BP down, cholesterol down. And no new autoimmune issues!! The low carb diet is not sustainable. And the high fat high protein diet that low carb forces is hghly inflammatory, which is exactly what you DON’T want with autoimmune conditions. I find WFPB very easy to maintain. I can eat all the fruit, veggies, beans, and whole grains I want. And nuts in moderation. I’m never hungry. If you want to try it, I’d be happy to coach you and support you by email, text or phone. Just let me know.

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  297. 297
    Jim Brinegar

    I cannot offer an expert opinion on your health issues, but it seems to me that you need to go to your bone marrow, find out who is in charge down there, and take that boss-fella bone marrow cell on a tour of your body. It may help to visualize the boss-fella bone marrow cell as Animal from the Muppets.
    Jenny: … and this is our thyroid gland.
    Bone marrow cell: Attack! Attack!
    Jenny: No. No. This is our thyroid gland.
    BMC: Attack?
    Jenny: No. Nice thyroid. Leave thyroid alone.
    BMC: Ooooooh. Nice thyroid?
    Jenny: Nice thyroid.
    BMC: Sorry.
    Then continue the tour, repeating this process for each of the tissues your immune system is trying to destroy.

    Now, I CAN offer an expert opinion on the savage consumption of roasted chicken, and, oddly enough, it also involves visualizing Animal from the Muppet show. Only this time, you need to try to eat the chicken as though you were Animal.
    Jenny: Chicken! Chicken! <snarl, shed, gulp, etc.>
    I also suggest you get either Victor or Hailey to toss some chicken feathers about as you do so.

    Like

  298. Hashimoto’s and RA – please read Anthony William’s book “Medical Medium”. It can change your life.

    Like

  299. That sucks, sometimes life whacks us all for no good reason. I wish you everything of the best, and hope you feel much better quickly

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  300. I salute your dedication to illustrate every malady in whatever medical tome you’re referencing but FFS tap out and let someone else have a turn.

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  301. ‪I have a friend with RA who has had much relief from seeing this doctor: https://www.ldnscience.org/resources/interviews/interview-burton-berkson‬

    His office is in Las Cruces, just a few miles south of Hatch. Hope you can find the solutions you need. Praying for you!

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  302. I second the suggestion of a commenter a few posts back about Dr. Gundry’s book The Plant Paradox. I checked into it right away (because I’m weird like that, always reading). It really does seem as if his approach is CURING autoimmune disorders. It’ a pretty restrictive diet but hey you’re already there right? Maybe you could get on the list to be a patient of his Jenny. Apparently there’s a long wait list but I bet, famous author here, you could be bumped to the head of the line. Also, he’s based in Palm Springs, CA., but wouldn’t it be worth a shot. Because like so many others on here, Not impressed with your doctor! Whatever you decide, wishing you feel much better…

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  303. I should have responded this morning(duh) I’m truly sorry if anything I say has already been said before. I honestly believe Armour thyroid saved my life.To make a long story short I have Hashimoto’s and endometriosis. My son has Chrons disease… so I kinda get it. Autoimmune is fun times! Are you doing the Foodmap diet? It’sreally working for me GERD/IBS

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  304. I am so sorry. THIS ISN’T FAIR!!
    I mean, I’m on a cruel eating plan that involves no flour, no sugar, but of course it does include hummus and raw spinach and carrots. I’m hungry, I’ve been trying to eat this way for MONTHS but all I’ve lost is 20 pounds and my sense of humor. Somehow YOU haven’t lost your sense of humor… why is that? Wishing you some actual good news. And if your doctor isn’t compassionate (I’m really hoping you’ve exaggerated for the sake of that humor you haven’t misplaced) please get a different doc. One who likes vodka.

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  305. Much love. Listen to your doctors, not the internet. And don’t worry about getting TB from Armadillos. They give you leprosy.

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  306. Dude. I feel the same way. Like, how is it even possible that I am alive when my body (not to mention brain) is constantly TRYING TO KILL ME? If you would like a laugh, Google “Alpha-Gal.” Then you can cram your face hole with bacon and yell, “I will eat all the mammal-things just because I can. Fuck off body!”

    I’ve had it for 5 years, but for some reason I never became allergic to cheese. Until now. FML and my tasty skin.

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  307. 308
    Annette Macintyre

    My husband is a doctor and has tested positive for the TB bacteria because he was exposed to it as an intern in an inner city ER. No problems from it ever. Feel better.

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  308. Such a familiar story, except my hospital in Taiwan takes my blood every two weeks and I’m pretty sure they are creating their own special blood bank for especially fucking sick people like me. Many diseases. We started shopping for wheelchairs in April, but I am heading for one fast. I’m thinking the next two years tops because I can’t get access to injection therapy in Taiwan – thus DMARDS and NSAIDS for Ankylosing Spondylitis, Fibromylagia, CRPS, CFS, some sort of thyroid condition, Myofascial Pain Syndrome, IBS, Multiple Chemical Sensitivities. I can’t even drive now because filling up the car makes me pass out. Come to think of it, standing for more than 20 minutes also makes me pass out. No diet has ever helped me since I was diagnosed. I’ve tried them all and I’ve done several elimination diets. My docs are convinced I am allergic to the world. And people…

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  309. At least you haven’t been bitten by one of those ticks that makes you allergic to meat!

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  310. Jesus Jenny…are you sure that your doctor’s office isn’t like in a quarantine zone or something? Smart ass comment aside, hopefully they can figure out enough to keep you feeling better. Also while I didn’t go low carb, I mostly cut gluten and found the migraines I had 20+ days a month dropped to one or two (though 50x worse). So it does help some people. Though I also used to make bread weekly and haven’t in so long now I’ve probably forgotten. And cookies, eclairs, palmiers, and why was it a good idea to cut gluten again???

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  311. I’m sorry it just seems like one illness after another for you.

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  312. Dear Jenny,
    I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I really hope the docs pull something out of the bag for you (ideally some taxidermy….). Winston Churchill said “When you’re going through hell, keep going”. Keep going. We love you

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  313. Shit, I’m so sorry Jenny. Not being able to have the RA meds sucks. I hope they find something else just as good.

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  314. Hubs has RA, and that SUCKS that your medication has to end. At least for now. (has to end for now. Not implying that it will only suck for now. But I’m trying to think you can get your meds back sometime.)
    Also, I just ordered a pizza. Not because of a nervous breakdown that I know of, but who knows what tomorrow could bring?

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  315. Even before you said “Bacon and Vodka” I was thinking – all the bacon you can eat!!! Of course that bacon is better crumbled on a pizza. (sorry.)
    I am on perpetual low sugar/low carbs because of diabetes…but life goes on. (and dammit, I can’t have all the bacon because of heart disease.)
    I am slowly learning to like foods that I can have. But a pizza, a beer and chocolate cake with ice cream sounds amazing. -I am gonna go cry now.

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  316. “…the saddest burrito ever.” Love you.
    I’m so sorry for all you’re going through. You are too sweet to continue entertaining us. Such a giver. Take care, Jenny!

    Like

  317. 318
    Nichole (with an aich)

    Oh my gracious, I’m so sorry about the TB. I know there’s a legitimate medical reason for you to have it, but that is so very ridiculously old-timey (When I read it, I literally thought, “Wait, that’s like … CONSUMPTION, right?”) I have to concur that someone has cursed you.

    I am doing Atkins intermittently and while it is the only thing that has worked for me, weight-loss-wise, it also makes me miserable because BREAD. Hence the “intermittently.” Here’s hoping the doctors figure something out for you soon.

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  318. Dont you get we’re here for YOU? If you’re sick and need to vent thats as important as a giant metal chicken. We dont know eachother on a personal level b8t I feel what you’re go8ng through. Thank you for being so candid.

    Liked by 1 person

  319. So many of us love you Jenny. We are all so sorry for your multitude of medical problems, but love and admire your ability to be smart and funny while suffering so much. I too live in Texas. Sometimes I think getting out of here would be beneficial to my health and sanity. We could start a colony somewhere else. You could lead us. So many of us would follow you to a healthier and more loving place.

    Like

  320. You’re in my thoughts in prayers, I’m so sorry for these difficult times you’re going through… I have to say, though, that your attitude and perseverance help keep me going. Keep on keeping on, you’re an inspiration!

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  321. Sending healthy vibes your way. Sorry that they want to take away the one drug that actual works. Totally know that frustration… years of trial and error to find the one ‘miracle’ drug that seems to help only to have some doctor or drug company take it away. I’d suggest going to a gun range to help decrease some of your frustration but that would require leaving your house. (Know that anxiety too) Instead I suggest buying a piñata and taking a knife to it. (I also realize you can’t fill it with candy but maybe small bottles of vodka?) Allows you to be stabby but no one gets hurt.

    Fingers crossed for good news somewhere.

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  322. 323
    Anonymous

    I was exposed to TB recently as well – my doctor said it was probably because I’d been on an international flight recently, NBD. I made the choice not to treat it at that time, but I’m rethinking things now. Why let it stay latent in my system? It’s an INTRUDER. So I’m going to go through the 3 month treatment period and get it over with. It’s just a series of shots and very effective, so hopefully they’ll get you fixed up and on your way quickly so you don’t have to deal with the while wheelchair thing. Good luck, Jenny.

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  323. 324
    Elizabeth

    Things cannot stay this shitty – things will get better. And by “things”, I mean you will discover that there is a brand of chocolate that’s low carb and doesn’t taste like shit – Lily’s – most grocery stores have it, but eBay and Amazon always do (it’s just outrageously expensive.)
    I’m on the same diet, but for diabetes. It’s amazing all the shit that it’s cured, though, honestly. I haven’t had over 20g of carbs in nearly 3 years and I’ve lost a lot of weight. Oh, and also, there are pizza substitutes you can make that you’ll look at the recipe now and think “fuck that”, but in a month you’ll be like “BRING THAT FUCKER ON!!!” Google “I breathe I’m hungry” because that girl’s blog has saved a bit of my sanity, and every bit helps. I love you Jenny, and I’m so pissed off that you’re going through all of this. I wish I could give you a gentle hug. ❤

    Like

  324. Also, have you tried marijuana for your pain? It can really help.

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  325. Hard to decide if you want quality to life (carbs) or quantity (miserable years to live). I chose quality!!

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  326. Thinking of you and keeping in in my prayers…

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  327. 328
    Anonymous

    I wish I could contribute something funny or witty as a nice pick-me-up for you… but I’ve haven’t had my coffee yet, so my brain’s not there. But at the very least, I wanted to tell you that I think you’re handling all of this nonsense (to put it lightly) better than I ever would! This all sucks and I wish you weren’t going through any of it… and in the oft-used words of my daughter, “IT’S NOT FAIR!”. I hope you start feeling better very soon!

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  328. And the hits just keep on coming. I’m sorry but you keep being you and you will, metaphorically or otherwise, kick it’s ass.

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  329. What can I say, beyond THAT SUCKS ROCKS!!!!!!!
    I am so sorry. Why can’t all these diseases find someone who actually deserves to be sick to invade instead of hanging around you?
    Just know that you have a lot of people who are pulling for you, sending you good energy every single day. We love you.
    You will get through this. You will get through this. You will get through this.

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  330. i put myself on the low carb/no sugar diet…for a while…than I couldn’t handle. The craving for a full loaf of white bread and a gallon of pepsi was just TOO much…sigh…I should have stuck with it…but oh well.
    I hope you feel better soon…i’m sending you warm fuzzies I’d mail you my kitty, because he does qualify as a warm fuzzie, but he’d probably be ticked by the time he got there…than he’d be an angry warm fuzzie…which kind of defeats the purpose…so I’ll just keep him here and you can pretend I’ve mailed him to you. After he kneads your thigh for a bit, he’ll flop on your lap and hug you.

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  331. OMG! I can relate to every detail, right down to the TB thing. After reading your book I was amazed at how much I sound like you. So I have been connected to your Blog. All this “autoimmune” crap, the IBS and all the fun features of Dis Ease. Sending sunshine and lollipops , meaning health and stuff.

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  332. 333
    bodybyemmy

    Not a doctor, and probably no one wants to hear my opinion on the matter, but a low carb diet is probably the opposite of what you want to be on. I’ve had a thyroid condition since I was 15. Pretty much all I ate was meat. I was miserable and my medication was a mess for years. Dropped meat, no longer miserable, and my medication hasn’t needed a change in as long as I can remember.

    Carbs are not the enemy. Refined carbs (read donuts, white bread, etc) should be avoided, but plant foods with naturally occurring carbs are very good, healing foods. I’m not saying this for any sort of animal welfare thing (though that’s important) but because I suffered too long when I shouldn’t have. The only training on nutrition that doctors get in medical school is how to feed a patient through an IV.

    If you’re dealing with an autoimmune disorder, diabetes, or anything related to inflammation meat is only making that worse. No, it’s not fun to give up, but please look into the information out there by Dr. Fuhrman, Dr. McDougall, Dr. Esselstyn, and Dr. Greger.

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  333. Three in my household are on second month of low carb/sugar diet. Lots of lost lbs (son is no longer pre-diabetic) and increased energy.
    We survive evening cravings with sugar free popsicles (the artificial sweeteners might kill us, tho)
    and sugar free jello(dissolved in 1C boiling water) + plain greek yogurt. Also Miracle brand (Amazon) orzo and noodles (looks like snot in a bag, but drained, rinsed, and heated until dry, simmered in chicken broth, is a filling pasta substitute). Keeping a pot of “chicken soup” around helps, too (use the Miracle noodles cut up, rotisserie chicken and low fat/sodium chicken broth + spices) I also make a tolerable pumpkin muffin using ground Fiber One Cereal as flour that helps with bread cravings.

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  334. Another thought…My husband has regular sessions in an oxygen/decompression chamber and has reduced inflammation, skin cleared up, increased endurance. NFL players at his gym got him into that…they all use for healing and recovery.

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  335. 336
    Anonymous

    Your posts always reassure me that I am not the only human born into suffering. Does anyone else wonder if we were just a tad less human, we would have been the offspring that our mother ate/ kicked out of the nest upon our birth?….meh, probably just me

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  336. Good God Jen. I promise I won’t complain about my autoimmune crap again! Well, at least not for the rest of the day. And I totally get it. I’m also fed up and tired of being sick and tired. I hate hurting and feeling like crap every single stinking day. I also realize how people with autoimmune diseases are more likely to be depressed. I’m teetering on the edge of falling into a deep pit of despair. I work hard on staying away from the edge though! I will keep thinking of you and sending loving, strong, healing strength your way!

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  337. I’m on a pretty much no carb/no sugar diet, for over a year now. I love it. But then I can live on cheese alone,which is my favorite food. I do it to mostly regulate my blood sugar, which drops really low if I eat sugar or carbs that turn to sugar. My body over-reacts to it, sends out way too much insulin, and I get very sick. It hasn’t happened once since I stopped eating carbs and sugar.
    My husband always has a positive TB test, since he comes from Mexico it’s pretty common. His chest x-rays are always clear.
    My son is trying to get in the army, and he has positive TB tests too, but we don’t know where his come from. He’s never been out of the country. So far the army isn’t thrilled with the results, although his chest x-rays are also clear they just don’t know what to do wih him.

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  338. I have EDS. And fibromyalgia. I’ve been on thyroid supplements sin my 20’s (I’m in my 50’s). I’m allergic to pretty much every thing, and am acquiring more and more weirdo food allergies. My asthma is becoming chronic, which goes well with my chronic pain. And migraines. And on and on.

    I looked up Hashimoto’s disease, pretty sure that’s me.

    You made me laugh out loud at collecting autoimmune diseases. Thank you for that. I’m going to go buy all of your books now.

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  339. So sorry, Jenny. I have Hashimoto’s & TB in my blood, too (& at the moment am at the lowest number in range of pre-diabetes), but nothing like your other complications. Your diet worked for me for many years as a weight-loss & maintainance tool, though not so much after menopause – but I think it’s a great diet. What I really want to advise you (as I’m sure your doctor has) is DRINK LOTS & LOTS OF WATER, besides the vodka. High protein diets are famous for promoting kidney stones; I had 2 bouts with them & they are as painful (or more) than childbirth. Also, the high-fat can be a challenge to your gall bladder & form stones there as well. So make sure your doc monitors these things; with the RA I’m sure it’s easy to mis-assign symtoms. There! Didn’t I just make your day better?

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  340. I’ve been on a lowcarb (keto) diet for my epilepsy and I basically found that cauliflower is the shit. You can mix it up with cheese to make a pizza bottom (topped with, duh, more cheese), or you just cover plain cauliflower with shitloads of cheese, put it in the oven and eat with steak or chicken. You van alsof look into cloud bread, or low carb anything (tortillas, pasta..). I ate a lot of Atkins snacks). I hope you feel better soon, I’m rooting for you. Lots of love!

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  341. My doctor put me on a low carb diet. I was so miserable that I decided I would rather die than eat like that. I really mean that! BTW what is the type of RA you have? I never heard anyone talk about RA that attacks random joints like I read in your first book. I think I might have that also. I cannot find that by searching but I swear you said that.

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  342. I am so sorry you are going through all of this. Truly.

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  343. Hang. The. Fuck. In. There. I’m undergoing the, “gee, we don’t know what wrong with you… Maybe it’s:( fill in the blank with whatever the weird shit you can think of blank,) too. It’s ridiculous, frustrating, insanity-inspiring stuff. Joy. But we’re alive-ish, right? See? Silver lining!

    Like

  344. You are such a fabulous human who brings others such comfort and joy, so I can’t imagine why you have to go through so much. Just know that you are kick ass and a ton of people love you and are rooting for you!

    Like

  345. 346
    Anonymous

    It’s time to drop the MDs and find yourself a good witch doctor and/or exorcist.

    Like

  346. I have often thought that every time my body acquires some new allergy or malady that I should lose an allergy or malady I already have. That would be a fair compromise don’t you think? Gain one, lose one instead of gain, gain, gain until one can no longer touch, smell or eat anything with out fear of some sort of reaction or infection. Like when I acquired a wheat allergy my existing grass pollen allergy should have disappeared or when I acquired eczema my lanolin allergy should have gone the way of the Dodo. But no. My body, like yours has been trying to kill me. It has found some sort of Allergy & Auto-Immune Home Shopping Network and won’t be satisfied until it has collected them all. Allergies to Fragrances the Complete Skin & Respiratory Misery Set for only $19.99 (plus $5.95 Shipping & Handling) I don’t have that one – oooh wait This one comes with reactions to natural and chemical fragrances….!!!! I must have that!!! When I was a child I was terrified that I would have to live my life in a bubble and now that is exactly what I long for. I have multiple respiratory & skin allergies, IBS, Colitis, Celiac and SIBO (Small Intestine Bacterial Overgrowth), PMDD (a NASTY form of depression linked to getting your period. I like to call it Psychotic PMS but the MPs aka Medical Professionals frown upon that for some reason), fucked up eustachian tubes and no ear drum in my left ear. I may have a Bicuspid Aortic Valve but I have put off getting tested for it because I really don’t feel like adding another pre-existing condition to my list. Luckily I don’t have TB. Yet. I feel for you. I love your books and reading your blog because – and I mean this in a good way – you make me feel less other, less unique, less the only one with all these issues and so do all the other people who comment about their issues. I have never been one to want to stand out. I am shy and would much rather blend in and I have stood out like a sore thumb most of my life from family and friends because of all of my health issues. I feel like I blend in when I read your blog and the comment from other readers so even though many of you are suffering, thank you for making me feel – even though we don’t know each other – like I fit.

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  347. 348
    Olivia Arquette

    You’ve earned 500 points for cohesively using Doc Holliday and vagina in the same sentence. Well done! (So sorry you’re feeling crappy. Feel better!)

    Like

  348. 349
    Stephanie

    I have a positive skin test for TB, too, but I didn’t get it until after I was 35, so I didn’t have to do the antibiotics. I just had to get the chest x-ray. (It was clear, but this was several years ago –holy smokes, it was a decade ago! I should get it redone.) Because I have the positive skin test, though, my doctor recommended I get the pneumonia vaccine even though I am technically “too young” for it. So I got the pneumonia vaccine.

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  349. 350
    Anonymous

    This update is seriously good. The lungs are where TB goes in order to settle down and make your body its long-term home. It’s much harder to kill TB in the lungs, and in the lungs you need a fully active immune system to keep it from becoming an active infection. Your doctor is obviously where you should go for this type of information, but my guess is this means you don’t have to go completely off your arthritis meds.

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  350. Type II Diabetes, Hashimoto’s, PCOS, ADD, Dyslexia, clinical depression, severe joint pain, sluggish metabolism (aka FATTY ALERT). I’m pretty sure the next time I see my doc she’ll want to add at least one more to the ever-growing list of things that will likely kill me sooner rather than later. YAY!

    In other words, I feel you. So hard. (((hugs)))

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  351. 352
    TheOriginalPhoenix

    My dad has a low-carb, low-sugar diet going. I’m not sure how he manages it at all. I wish you all the best in your recovery!

    Like

  352. Oh, I’m glad you have 346 comments. That means you just got 341 get well cards and five or six people who have the same disease that you have and need hugs as much as you do. With the incredible array of diseases you have, it’s no wonder there are a bunch of people who can say ‘oh, me too, I feel like shit just like you.’

    I have a suggestion for all the rest of us who are also carb-impaired – Send Jenny recipes she will love. I hate that new riced cauliflower stuff you can buy in a bag, but I roast cauliflower rolled in a bit of breadcrumbs, salt, pepper, garlic, and Parmesan and it’s good enough to eat a whole head. (The cauliflower head, not the doctor’s head.) I also make rad omelettes with all the veggies I’m supposed to eat covered in egg, dill, and cheese. Can you eat cheese? And the weirdest and happiest salad I make is with raspberries and smoked salmon on greens. I drink a shit-ton of Perrier. And I eat one row of Lily’s Dark Chocolate sweetened with stevia every day. (Maybe I’m allowed more carbs than you though, so I’m sorry if I just killed you with my chocolate reference.)

    You take good care.

    Like

  353. Has anyone suggested trying the Whole30? (mostly likely, but you’re too popular -which is awesome, you’re my absolute favorite- for me to read all the comments) It’s a program designed to eliminate all the bad stuff for 30 days (NO cheating) to reset your body. The idea is you take out ALL sugar, grains, dairy, alcohol, processed crap, and industrial oils. Your diet would consist of all the veggies, meat, fruit and (good)fats you can handle. Fat is good now! Once the 30 days are over you slowly reintroduce types of eliminated foods (like dairy) to see how your body reacts. its not for everyone but the creator, Melissa Hartwig, is a badass. She’s awesome and the community is incredible. She has a bunch of books out now, but It Starts With Food is the one to read if you want to understand the science behind it. Very in depth. The Whole30 book skips a lot of the why and goes straight into what to eat. If done the right way the whole30 is a life changer. Please give it a try, it really opens your eyes to how large a role what we eat plays in to how we feel. I’m, as always, cheering you on!

    Also, thank you for the kindness you showed my fiancé and I during your book signing in Dayton years ago! I understand how difficult the whole experience was for you but you didn’t show it all. You rocked it!

    Like

  354. You’ll take any win you can get, right? Hoping things get better for you soon!

    Like

  355. 356
    MsRobinEgg

    Oh Jenny – I am right now raising a glass of bacon flavored vodka in your honor!

    Like

  356. 357
    AnonyMouse

    How fucked up is it that I was all “Hey me too!” in my head about the Hashimoto’s. I’ve also got to do a the low carb thing or else I become a moody snappish nightmare. I’ve got fibromyalgia instead of RA which has many of the same fun symptoms as RA. (they test you for RA before they diagnose fibro). So I think we are living some kind of messed up parrallel lives. I get to skip the missing blood mystery fun though, and don’t have TB.

    I’m gonna go have a vodka and tonic to celebrate you not having Tb in your lungs.

    Like

  357. 358
    Jeanne Desy

    Carbs are involved in the regulation of mood. I learned this the hard way. You’re not going to an alternative doc, are you? They like to take away the foods you love.

    Like

  358. Like Lili, I’ve had good luck with the Autoimmune Paleo Diet (AIP). I recommend Isabella Wentz’s books on Hashimoto’s, too. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this, but there are definitely things that can help you feel better. Good luck!

    Like

  359. 360
    Todd Swoboda

    Have you talked to your doctor about bacon flavored vodka?

    Like

  360. 361
    Anonymous

    Watch the movie Forks Over Knives on Netflix. They claim people have cured their rheumatoid arthritis from eating a plant based diet.

    Like

  361. 362
    Jacqueline

    A young friend of mine applied for a great job he really needed. The person hiring him, who spoke with a thick foreign accent, called to tell him to come in Monday for a “pee pee” test. I thought that was odd phrasing for a medical professional but whatever. My friend came over and tearfully admitted to me that he had been at a party a few weeks before and may have ingested marijuana. I didn’t ask questions because he was crying and afraid this would cost him the job. He spent the entire weekend at my house drinking what looked like gallons of some concoction he bought at a questionable establishment and that he believed guaranteed him cleansed of whatever traces might be left in his system. It was a tense weekend. I drove him on Monday morning to the test and sat in the car while he went in. I saw him come out of the building doubled over and clutching his gut and I thought, “Oh no, this didn’t go well.” Actually he was laughing because he’d misheard the man on the phone. He wasn’t required to take a “pee pee” test but rather a TB test. He passed and got the job. (This is the only tuberculosis story I know.) I hope you feel better, Jenny.

    Like

  362. Medical CBD Marijuana. I know Texas can’t update to the 2017 version of life, but I’m sure you could find a connection 😉 I mean, if you’re going the Doc Holliday with a vagina route, you might as well throw on a deputy star and cross a state border or two to get what you need.

    Like

  363. Congratulations on being less sick! Don’t get discouraged! Keep going in that direction! You’re probably tired of hearing suggestions but I’ll throw one more out there. Check out Dr. Joel Fuhrman’s books. His books ‘Eat to Live’ and ‘The End of Dieting’ has given me a new perspective on the healing power of foods. I still have to take meds for my mental health issues but I feel like he’s putting me on the right track in every other area of my health.

    Like

  364. I know you get all kinds of advice but I’m treating my Grave’s Disease naturally and these things might help:
    – Reishi mushroom extract (helps with exhaustion and sleeplessness)
    – Restore 4 Life supplement (google it) (helps heal gut which is the root of the problem)
    – The “Auto Immune Protocol” modified Paleo diet which also heals the gut and lets you have carbs IF they are high in nutrition (i.e. beets). I modify this by cheating with fish oil and powdered greens supplements and liver pills.

    [Climbs on soapbox] Ahem. BTW the reason everyone is getting sick is that Roundup is all over our food, and it makes holes in the gut, and undigested food gets into the blood and causes systemic inflammation. Down with Monsanto!! No more GMOs!! Go organic!! [Climbs down.]

    Like

  365. BTW: Tips for your diet: learn to like sardines. They are good travelling food. Also, learn to make Paleo Cracklin’ Chicken, which is basically fried chicken with sea salt and is The Everything.

    Like

  366. 367
    Anonymous

    For what it’s worth, my mother has tested positive for TB in her bloodstream for most of her life. She was exposed to it as a child in Germany. It has never turned in anything serious. ❤

    Like

  367. I feel so badly right now. I .. I have lost 140 lbs on low carb/no added sugars. I feel fabulous, my arthritis almost never bothers me, I have another 150 or so to go and I love it! But carbs, esp grains and bread are such overeating trigger foods for me I will never be able to freely eat them. I just look at it as a sort of allergy, although I don’t call myself gluten sensitive or bug restaurants. May you feel better soon, Jenny. Texas peeps are tough! — Azrael

    Like

  368. Vagus, baby. Vagus.
    Our gut’s a good brain. Very talkative. A truth-teller.

    Like

  369. 370
    Anonymous

    I may have figured out what is wrong with you. I think your doctor is trying to roofie or something.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-4629660/Low-carb-diet-similar-effect-brain-ecstasy.html

    Like

  370. Jeeeze-Louise, this is so simple to diagnose (why does that word have a nose in it?): You have zombies following you trying to take over your body. You think it’s your fan club following you but nooooooo, it’s zombies, just hovering and waiting for you to give it up. Aren’t you suspicious that maybe “Hashimoto” is Japanese for “zombie”?

    Like

  371. Soon science will allow you to have a robot body. They will just scoop your beautiful brain out of your head and viola!

    Like

    DGGYST recently posted Hippie Shit That Actually Works.

  372. 373
    CJ Schiller

    Hi!
    I wasn’t sure the best place to get in contact with you so I hope this works.
    My name is CJ. I just graduated from college and the past couple of years I’ve been going through a bout of depression. Your books have helped more than I can convey. They made me laugh when I didn’t think I could smile. So thank you for sharing your story in the uniquely, hilarious way that you do. In about a month and a half I’m leaving WA state and moving to Indiana for grad school. I’m going to be road tripping out to Indiana and I had an idea to leave your book “You Are Here” at random places along the way for people to find. The thing is, I can only really afford to spend about $20 on the books. I can get 2 copies for that much money but I thought I’d reach out and see if you could help me at all. If not, well that’s still two more people that can benefit from your book. Thank you again for writing about your struggles and (mis)adventures and for existing in the imperfectly perfect way that you do.

    Like

  373. It took a long time, but I AM feeling better. (2 surgeries, weight gain, mobility issues, etc…) I just pretend I’m wintering in the best cave ever: Wi-Fi, Netflix, ALL the channels, and I shall emerge as glossy as bear and able to forage all the best berries and grubs, and everyone will be jealous of how shiny and plump I am for someone who hibernated until mid-summer. But Is shall not eat salmon. Just sayin’. Hang in there.

    Like

  374. I’m adding you to my prayer list. You hang in there, this world needs your bright light! 🌟

    Like

  375. A month of heathy eating and a twelve pound weight loss is pretty admirable. Maybe you can get Taco Bell to add that humus burrito to their menu and name it after you… Just a suggestion. I hope you feel better!

    Like

    mylifeiswear.com recently posted Coming Up: A Four Part Series That WILL BLOW YOUR MIND!.

  376. Dude, I hope like hell you actually read this. I have Hashimoto’s too, but I was in my 50s when it was diagnosed. My Harvard edumicated doctor (she studied in both endocrinology and nutrition) did blood tests, found I had antibodies for gluten and cow milk in my blood, and she changed my diet and saved my life. She banned me from all wheat/gluten and all cow-dairy products. Over time, my hands stopped hurting and my (sneezing, wheezing) allergies pretty much disappeared. Also, my body stopped trying to destroy my thyroid, which is of course what Hashimoto’s Disease is. It’s an immunological disease like rheumatoid arthritis: your body is going after itself.

    PLEASE substitute ordinary bread with gluten free bread when you are allowed to eat bread again, and substitute pecorino romano (sheep milk cheese) for cow milk-based Parmesan, and real buffalo-milk mozzerella for the cheap, crappy cow-milk-based version American supermarkets sell (real Italian mozzerella was originally made with buffalo milk.) There are a ton of great goat-based cheeses at Trader Joes you can substitute for the cow milk version. Substitute sorbet for ice cream (Hagen Daas makes amazing milk-free sorbet, as does Talenti (they make sorbetto in addition to gelato.) Get gluten-free munchies instead of wheat-based munchies, there are a ton of them out there. You will not feel like you’re missing anything if you go gluten and cow-juice free. There are so many work-arounds to eat instead.

    The best gluten-free breads (you can find them at Trader Joe’s) are “Food For Life” breads, but they are heavy and you should toast them to really enjoy them. Schar’s breads are closer to wheat bread in texture, and they make a whole range of very ordinary-seeming breads for sandwiches. You may have heard the expression “beer belly”, the reason you get a beer belly if you drink beer is the wheat in it. It’s actually a wheat belly. Make sure the vodka you’re drinking is gluten-free, too, like “Tito’s Handmade Vodka”. Use olive oil with a little salt on your bread instead of butter.

    At a birthday party, I recently tried to eat a tiny bit of chocolate cake from a local bakery that I used to be addicted to–it tasted awful and I spit it out quietly in my napkin even as everyone else talked about how great the cake was. It’s like my body got free of wheat and now knows it’s bad for me, so it tastes awful. Cow milk products taste oily and nasty to me, too, but I enjoy goat brie and cheddar, and love a little pecorino romano on gluten-free crackers with a glass of red wine.

    Good luck, it’s tough when your body is literally trying to kill you. I know how that feels!!!

    Like

  377. 378
    ReaderRita

    Food is food, but also tastier medicine.

    Like

  378. Hello, Bright Line eating chick who has hashimoto’s magically came up with a no flour or sugar ever diet that’s almost survivable although clearly you would still need to adapt it for your own health bits… clever, scientist stuff involved and may be worth a google late at night. Stumbled upon it myself for will power reasons and worked a treat but was surprised she was managing it with her own health stuff. Good luck, I’ve gone without a pizza for 2 months and surprisingly have not killed anyone thanks to this diet (although I kept alcohol and caffeine so maybe not playing fair), yet.

    Like

  379. 380
    Anonymous

    I am so sorry to hear of your health issues not being resolved. It’s interesting the things that doctors DON’T tell you. I also have RA, Hashimotos, and Fibromyalgia … as well as some other non autoimmune diseases. Not once have I ever heard that TB is likely for people with autoimmune diseases. 😦

    Like

  380. 381
    C.Stephany

    Wow – I just have to say I can relate to you so much. I have several health conditions and a mast cell disease (diff from yours but still I can relate) and was recently laid off after not being able to come back from a leave of absence. 20 yr career down the toilet.. One step forward and 10 steps back. I continue to cry Uncle but clearly no one is listening. Each time I go to the doc I get new meds to try. I’m fucking exhausted. Anyhoo – You’re sense of humor is so refreshing. I binge-read a dozen of your posts. I’m also on a diet – literally all I can have is veggies and meat and only certain mean and certain veggies. Oh and a couple fruits. NOTHING else. I’m allergic to soy, wheat, milk, peanuts, corn, eggs, walnuts and a couple others. If I eat them I have a number of symptoms such as blowing up like a fucking marshmellow in the microwave or having pain so bad I think I’m going to die. It. Fucking. Sucks. Just wanted to say hi and that I’m really sorry to hear about your latest shitty news and that I will continue to read your blog. Thank you!!!

    Like

  381. Your post is how I feel… but you make me sound vibrantly healthy in comparison. Thank you.

    Hugs.

    Sending electronic wine slushies and chocolate.

    Like

    Dark Matter Zine recently posted Kong: Skull Island.

  382. It sounds like it’s time for some celebration vodka. And anti-TB vodka, which are conveniently packaged in the same bottle! Hugs. We love you.

    Like

  383. Pretty sure TB nets you a trip to the Amalfi Coast or some sun drenched place in Italy to recuperate and write poetry whilst drinking copious amounts of wine and experiencing ennui while looking at robust and pink cheeked young lads hauling in fishing nets. Either that or a sanatorium. But a fancy one where Victorian Grande Dames have taken to their beds and can only be revived with laudanum and gin and games of faro and canasta while genteelly bickering about who was most likely to succumb to the consumption- Agnes or Philomena. Is it going to be Philomena on account she had an affaire de coeur with with the head gardener? Or will it be Agnes, who is so devout she nibbles on the edges of her Bible and hopes that Jesus will take her up as soon as he notices how much she has consumed?

    Like

  384. 385
    Jason von Kreuzberg

    On the plus side, the TB will give you that pale, fragile, not-long-for-this-world look that catapulted Gwyneth Paltrow and all the heroines from Jane Austen and Louisa May Alcott novels to fame and fortune

    Like

  385. Good God girl I thought I had health issues! I feel quite well after reading yours thank you 😀

    Like

  386. I know a very special teenager who has latent TB and she found out when she was going to volunteer at a hospital. (See! No good deed goes unpunished!!!) She’s going to be on a 9-month round of medicine that should get rid of that pesky TB. So, here’s hoping you have the option in a year or so to go back on the meds that keep you out of a wheelchair. Prayers & fingers crossed for the best for you!

    Like

  387. 388
    Anonymous

    Doc Holliday with a vagina. Bwahahahahahah omg I love you Jenny. I hope you find some relief and feel better.

    Like

  388. Ordinarily I would say if you can choose to be Doc Holliday, always be Doc Holliday but in this instance, maybe not so much. I am also noticing that if each of your commenters on this post at this point could take your symptoms on themselves for just one day, you’d be totally healthy for over a year. And I’m sure we would all be willing to do it if we could! Which is a weird thought but there you go. What I’m saying is, I wish you felt ALL better but SOME better is good, too!

    Like

  389. I’m actually a TB researcher and while it may not make you feel any better, about 1/3 of the world’s population is infected with TB. Mostly, you get it from breathing, which does complicate efforts to control the spread.

    Like

  390. I am SO SORRY! My grandmother had RA and also developed TB… it was scary for all of us, so I get where you are at. I had no idea you were going through this. 😦

    This may sound way OUT THERE – but I have a wonderful nutritionist that deals specifically with auto-immune diseases and she may also recommend a low carb low sugar diet (grains and sugar create a lot of inflammation in our bodies which leads to and makes worse many auto-immune conditions) but she may have other ideas since you can’t do the injections. Just a thought. Email or PM me on FB if you want to talk to her. She manages several clients via Skype. 🙂 Much love and light to you darling, funny girl.

    Like

  391. Sorry to see you are so sick! I am impressed by your ability to remain hilarious in the face of all of this. You are one of my heros just so you know. Hang in there!

    Like

  392. My Doctor blew me off too when I asked if I had Hashi’s. He was like uh Duh it’s been on your record for years and then did no explaining of how why or when I was Diagnosed,. Good luck!

    Like

  393. 394
    Anonymous

    I think your books are hilarious and I happened to be attracted to a book today- Home is *ucking Burning by Dan Marshall. After I checked it out, I saw that Jenny Lawson endorsed it on the back. So, even though I have a couple of books, I’m totally reading this after my Laurie Notaro book. Question: Who are your favorite authors?

    Like

  394. I am so, so sorry, but on the upside: cheese.

    Like

  395. Oh, I’m on the no sugar diet too! It’s to try and not feed my cancer cells. I said fuck that when I ate a cereal bowl full of lemon pie filling last night. I’m not proud, but I’m also, remarkably, not ashamed either. Oh well, I’m dying anyway – may as well do it with a bowl of yellow happiness!

    Like

    Raine C. S. recently posted With Love We Live.

  396. 397
    Anonymous

    I did one of those diets. When I got bread back, my husband told me not to give it up again. Apparently, I get mean without carbs. Glad you don’t have the bad kind of TB!

    Like

  397. Damn Jenny, did you piss a Gypsy off in your younger years? My wife has RA and had to stop taking the injections. She know gets a monthly IV but I can’t remember the name of the medicine. I’ll try to find out.

    Like

    Arionis recently posted Back In The Mississippi Mud.

  398. Hey Jenny, one more for your doctor to check: MTHFR gene mutation. In Australia, doctors are starting to get in the know about it, but not sure if the USA doctors are across this. My long list of auto-immune issues baffled my doctors.

    My doctor here was like, you must have this gene mutation. And sure enough I did. At least now I have a reason for all my crazy medical s%$&. Now with a strict diet and a few lifestyle changes, I have a lot less issues.

    Here’s hoping for you!

    Like

  399. Crap! I’m sorry shit storm just never seems to stop. I had the “infected withTB but not an active case” business. I had to take nasty antibiotics for 6 months. I guess they worked because that was 25 years ago, and I’m still alive. If TB bacteria didn’t get the best of wimpy me, I know it won’t stand a chance with feisty you. I sure hope you find a good substitute for your RA injections.

    Like

  400. Another person that had a positive TB test (more like 4, because they didn’t believe the first 3). I did work in a hospital, but in the front office, and 3 of us somehow got exposed and put on meds. 25 years later, I’m on autoimmune roller coaster as well. No fun, no fun at all. I truly hope they find something that is easily remedied, and you feel better soon,

    Like

  401. Google AIP or Auto Immune Protocol Diet. See if it might be something that would help. Everyone is different and so everyone follows their own version of it, but the forums I’m in have a lot of people with various auto immune diseases find relief through it. It helps me when I’m following it, but when I don’t I can definitely tell the difference. Even if it’s not for you, good luck and I hope you find your way back to health.

    Like

  402. 403
    Jennifer

    Jenny, have you ever tried “The Tapping Solution”. (Nick Ortner and others)

    Like

  403. I’m kinda late to the commenting on this one bc this summer had been super busy but I’m also on the low carb diet (by choice) and I love it. Here’s a couple suggestions so you don’t kill someone:
    Look up “fathead rolls”. They’re made of mozzarella and cream cheese and you can use them for sandwiches or burgers and stuff.
    Take chicken tenders/pork chops/fish and use almond flour and Parmesan as bread crumbs then fry them in olive oil. SO GOOD!! You can also do this with zucchini slices. Best if you coat in egg first for stickiness.
    I love a quarter cup of berries covered in heavy cream when I want something sweet. Or check and see if you can eat Halo Top ice cream. It’s saving my diet bc it’s low carb and low sugar. The chocolate is especially good.

    Like

  404. I have an auto immune disease, I know how hard it is. Keep positive!

    Like

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