Based on a true story.
21 thoughts on “How to get out of going to a kid’s party”
Read comments below or add one.
Leave a Reply Cancel reply
MY BOOKS:
Subscribe to the bloggess, y'all.
Archives
MY INSTAGRAM
ALL THE COOL KIDS ADVERTISE HERE:
I fucking love these people & not just because they support my wine-slushee habit:
Flourish in Progress: (T)hug Life: Part hood. Part good.
Pregnancy Calendar at Alpha Mom: Amalah’s week-by-week guide to the miracle of pregnancy and all the various indignities that come with it.
Heather Mosko: Sharing the weird and crafty I find along the way as I research and write my next mystery.
The Mack Files: Digesting life in bite-sized pieces through the lens of clichés, quotes & “truisms”. Often irreverent, always honest.
Candid Kay: A heaping pile of steaming good.
Barking at the Moon: If your dog is your furry child, you will laugh out loud at Tracy Beckerman’s book about her family & a one-dog wrecking ball named Riley.
Talking Tatas: For the Love of Your Boobs.
No Pithy Phrase: Is my freak flag upside down again?
Kieran’s Humor: Not suitable for children, the sensitive, or those hoping to get into heaven.
Born to be Public by Greg Mania: Named one of the best books of 2020 by NPR, O, The Oprah Magazine, & more. You should read it.
Ingram Hills Dental: Local San Antonio badass dentist willing to talk and laugh you off the dental cliff. Military wife, mom and lover of sarcasm and teeth.
Perfectionist Anonymous: Proudly serving unpolished working motherhood, with bipolar depression and hilarity on the side.
Relatively Painless: “My only complaint is that I wanted more, which is a good complaint to have. It made me laugh and cry and then laugh again and then pee and then cry. Lots of fluids lost. But in a good way. A book to make you appreciate the tragically funny and beautiful horror of family.” — Jenny Lawson — use code BLOGGESS for $5 off a ticket to a live reading!
The Dating Days of Marta O: When I told my sister I was building a blog she asked ‘Do people still read blogs?’ I don’t know, but if YOU want to read it, click on the link. Keep in mind, reading about dating after 40 is for the brave. ~Marta O
Dear Childhood Me: Your inner child deserves all the love in the world—and, yes, even if that love is in the form of reflecting back on the time as a kid when you buried the PB&J in the backyard, dug it up the next day, and ate it.
The Art of Holly Eaton: Realism with a hint of surrealism! Paintings and Prints. Reasonably priced art for reasonable people
They Called Him Marvin: They were just kids, barely not teenagers. Desperate to be a family but a B29 and a war got in their way.
Bwaaa haaa haa haa
Sweet. That works?!!
I know exactly who you had that conversation with and he CRACKS me up! I love Big Toe.
I gotta remember that one.
Girlfriend, I know he didn’t.
That is cute. I almost bought a shirt for my son that said, “I am proof my mom likes to fuck!”
note to self: never let Mr. Hubby see this site . . .
I love the cartoons!
My husband won’t go to kids’ parties unless they are for
1. our son
2. a child whose family we hang out with socially
He came to this decision after attending a party where he was THE ONLY FATHER. Even the birthday child’s father wasn’t there.
Of course, at our son’s party, 2 other dads showed up, so it kind of blew that theory…That might have been since we started the revolution of dads attending parties too…But then we ended the revolution.
I’m loving the cartoons!
LOL!
Is it so wrong that I’m the dude in that cartoon? I swear I’m a good mother.
I 100% admit that I stole this line at dinner tonight.
Sorry. I was really tired, and I was out of witty conversation. Eh. At least I modified it from “moms” into “married chicks.” Does it make you happy to know that it solicited laughs? (The “moms put out” thing, that is.)
Okay, remember when I said that other cartoon was my favorite cartoon, what I meant to say was this cartoon is my favorite one ever.
That was the best cartoon ever. Seriously hilarious.
Well, mom’s DO put out. Or at least there’s proof that they HAVE. Victor should seriously reconsider if they still do…
Put out the trash or the laundry? I don’t get it.
Jenny – you should totally get the shirt.
I loooove this site…sorry it took me so long to find it. I think I would pay someone to put out for my husband so he’d leave me the heck alone. Oh wait, is that prostitution? Ummm…just kidding!!
It’s only prostitution if you admit you’re paying for sex. Modern day hookers call it “compensation for their time”
Hilarious!