Throwback Thursday: Google knows me a little too well.

Today’s Thursday and I usually post an old picture for #ThrowbackThursday but today I’m doing an old website instead.

Remember Googlism?  You’d put in your name and it would cross-reference the internet and find out what Google really thought about you.

I decided to revisit it today just to see what I’m up to now.  A few of my favorites:

  • Jenny Lawson is probably the only person who could ever understand Jenny Lawson.
  • Jenny Lawson is an award.
  • Jenny Lawson is a very strange girl who has friends in spite of herself.
  • The Bloggess is who she is.
  • The Bloggess is not a douche.
  • The Bloggess is getting over this.
  • The Bloggess is a guaranteed zombie.
  • The Bloggess is certainly no Anne Frank.
  • The Bloggess is obviously Team Jacob.
  • The Bloggess is my copilot.
  • TheBloggess is sooooooo not gonna like this copycat.
  • TheBloggess is that katanas from Japanese zombies? Or swords that turn people undead when you kill them?  Either way.
  • TheBloggess is in the house.
  • TheBloggess is on my ‘bloggerstosleepwith’ list.
  • TheBloggess is in West Texas this weekend and that is where the storm is.
  • TheBloggess is threatened by my beauty and success and threatened to “cut me bad” if I didn’t drop out of the scene.

Awesome.  And how are you today?  According to Google, that is?

187 thoughts on “Throwback Thursday: Google knows me a little too well.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. Obviously you are not a zombie, you are a partially-deceased sufferer. (also, are you watching In The Flesh? AH-MA-Zing)

  2. Google doesn’t know me at all. I’m not sure how I feel about that.

    (Try just your first name. “Anna is one of two bears commissioned for two grownup bridesmaids.” ~ Jenny)

  3. “TheBloggess is threatened by my beauty and success and threatened to “cut me bad” if I didn’t drop out of the scene.”
    Well, that escalated quickly.

  4. maybe you’re just threatened by my awesome beauty because you are a japanese zombie? or a katana? or a zombie-making katana?

  5. There probably needs to be a bumper sticker: “The Bloggess is my copilot.” 🙂

  6. Google says I am “not really well excepted in the society because it is pretty much non documentable”

  7. Google doesn’t know me either. I’m not sure whether I should consider that a life win or a total fail.

    But really, of course you’re Team Jacob……OBVIOUSLY. 🙂

  8. ok wait, I did my real name and Google’s first response is:

    (real name) is pregnant

    Google just goes for the throat. God, I just found out I couldn’t have biological children this week, you’d think Google would be a little sensitive to that. God Google, give it a rest, or give me money for more IVF attempts, either way.

  9. It says I am a graduate of blank. Not the actual word blank..just a blank. I so should have gone to college.

  10. My two favorites:
    nancy is close to going to hell
    nancy is the zetan emissary

  11. Awesome. I’m bout to go googlism myself. But I doubt they will know that today I deep throated a camera and had my esophagus dilated because I guess the fucker is too skinny. Also, I got paid a few months ago to write a ridiculous script for a commercial to play during a porno and that came out today. It’s the single most embarrassing thing I have ever written, and that includes angsty poetry from when I was 14.

    (Wait. Since when did pornos have commercial breaks? ~ Jenny)

  12. “marcia is recognized as america’s dream coach”
    And at first I thought it said couch and I was really excited. All I’d ever have to be is somewhere comfortable to park your ass.

  13. JD Bailey is the creator of Honest Mom.
    JD Bailey is an author.

    That’s it. Not super exciting. But I’m pretty happy with those descriptions. 🙂

  14. Apparently, I’m both unpretentious and outrageous. But with a rapidly approaching expiration date.

    knighton is unpretentious
    knighton is a throwback to early hollywood with dashing heroes
    knighton is good friends with quakers chairman george reynolds
    knighton is a good choice
    knighton is into the classical/celtic tradition
    knighton is six to eight months from execution at oklahoma state penitentiary
    knighton is more outrageous than any of these things

  15. Catherine is not evil.

    Whew! I’m glad it told me that, I was getting worried. 🙂

  16. Well, at least you’re not a douche. And it’s now a documented fact. Awesome. I’d consider that a good day.

  17. I love the guaranteed zombie. Since you asked, Kelly Fox “is trapped in the dungeon.” And Kelly Fox “is wonderful to watch.” And Kelly Fox “is no longer.” WHAT F-ING PSYCHO PUT ME IN THE DUNGEON TO TORTURE AND KILL ME? Oh wait. Maybe I’m “a graduate of texas a&m university” instead.

  18. Mine is kinda wonky because I forgot I share a name with a sports car. My favorite was “Elise is not street legal in the United States.”

  19. Ok, Jenny…I think I’ve solved the weird dreams about my, David Tennant, and riding in the Tardis:
    Cassandra is the pilot of oracle
    Cassandra is named as next of kin in the appraisal of James Tarleton in 1735

    I don’t think they were dreams…DAMN, there were so many things I wanted to do to David..I mean WITH David, not to…..

  20. I must be Emily Dickinson because it seems to think I’m Nobody,

  21. yup, googlism is pretty right about me:

    -janice is a loud brat
    -janice is a woman who accidentally subverts the ideals of modern day heroism. her mode of advancement and succession in life is brutal candour
    -janice is setting a good example which other stars without a degree should emulate
    -janice is now quitting and you have to hire and train someone to take over her responsibilities
    -janice is available for speaking engagements

  22. I’m not doing so well:
    geoffrey taylor is wheeled out the hospital on a stretcher and loaded into an ambulance

    But the most powerful Googlism…
    geoffrey taylor is [that’s it, I just AM]

  23. Wait, people are supposed to have “Bloggers to sleep with” lists? Well shit… Now I have to start reading more blogs and decide which bloggers I want to sleep with. It’s like perverted homework…

  24. Having a really common name makes these kind of horrible, but amazingly hilarious and weird. Let’s see what comes up for me.

    Sarah Green is 91 years old (22, but close!)
    Sarah Green is an innovative upbeat singer/songwriter who composes on keyboards (…n…no.)
    Sarah Green is the daugther of william green and rhoda menofee (No, but my grandfather’s name was William Green. WEIRD. Another result in this list was saying these people were from Massachusetts, which is where I’m from. WEIRDER.)
    Sarah Green is a woman (Sure!)

    Okay, let’s try my internet handle?
    Sorry, Google doesn’t know rahzombie (STORY OF MY LIFE.)

  25. I just learned so much more about you.

    By the way, mine has only two items that are not funny or interesting at all so apparantly Google doesn’t think about me much at all.

  26. I’m glad you’re not a douche, but that entry would have been infinitely better if it said you weren’t a douche canoe.

    And I would have thought “Jenny Lawson ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ BECAUSE WINE” would have made the list as well. (You can fill in the blanks so many ways, ya know?)

  27. Googlism for full name of course comes up with it not knowing me…but when I put in just my first name it just says Googlism for: deena (won’t even capitalize my name you bastards?) and then blank…Googlism knows me, it just also knows that if it has nothing nice to say it shouldn’t say anything at all. Thanks a lot Googlism, thanks a lot!

    Entering Googlism gets me “googlism is” on one line (nothing nice to say about itself either?) and “googlism is working now” on the next.

    Oh, apparently I have to ask What Where or When, not Who….and apparently I am a bitch…fair enough Googlism.

  28. Well, apparently Abby is “a congo African grey parrot” and “is all wet when it comes to her acceptance of hot tub nudity.” Where do I put that on my resume?

  29. Google doesn’t know me specifically.. But does know Andrea… My favorites…
    Andrea is known as the queen of Spanish television and especially telenovelas….
    Andrea is a beautifully restored holiday rental property in Tuscany near the border with Umbria.
    Andrea is changing into a bird.

    I’m not sure which is my favorite… Possibly the last one. Very Kafkaesque.

  30. The Bloggess is in the house! Whoop whoop!

    And apparently I’m a nobody. Googlism doesn’t know me.

    BUT! This makes it totally worth it: justin bieber is the gayest woman alive

  31. Okay, so if I want to create my hooker resume, here are some of the bullet-points I’m going to use:
    Gail is available for private parties
    Gail is available for conventions
    Gail is a people oriented individual and will give you personal yet professional service

    Also, “Gail is my goat”—I will only be someone’s goat if I can be one of those cute Fainting Goats!!

  32. sharon is talking about talks
    sharon is talking and fighting
    sharon is up to no good
    sharon is a ‘war criminal’
    sharon is israel’s worst enemy
    sharon is to join jeb bush at rally for israel in
    sharon is threatening nuclear
    sharon is striking down israel’s future
    sharon is the right man for the job
    sharon is right too
    sharon is not welcome in the united states petition

    Well, that last one just hurts…

  33. -rhoda is divorced and brenda is unwilling
    -rhoda is aghast to learn that brenda is considering having cosmetic surgery done on her nose
    -rhoda is caught in the middle until mary discovers joanne is prejudiced
    (My husband wants to know who the hell Brenda and Mary and Joanne are, and should he be worried)
    -rhoda is the only pug i know of that has met famous people like jenna elfman
    (Someone named their dog after me??? And the dog knows more famous people than I do)
    Ah…here are some truths:
    -rhoda is currently looking for self
    -rhoda is still a chatterbox and a shoulder to lean on

  34. mary-anne is the driving force behind global psychics’ customer services

    how did google know?

    and this:
    mary-anne is willing to do light housework

  35. Google says you are on its “bloggerstosleepwith” list? That’s kind of creepy. Even having that list is creepy. I have a “bloggers to meet in person” list. (You are definitely on it.) But not a list of bloggers I want to sleep with. Ok, maybe I do, but it’s a short list: My wife (who blogs as TheAngelForever).

    As for what Google thinks of me:

    “Sorry, Google doesn’t know techydad”

    Wait, what? After all that time using your services, Google? I searched with you. Used your e-mail client. Used your online documents service. Stored my files on your Drive. And now you see me walking through cyberspace and pretend not to know me?!! sniff No, that’s fine. I understand. sniff sniff You have a lot of people you’re seeing, Google. I shouldn’t (whimper) expect you to remember me. If you’ll excuse me, I just need to go take care of something. runs off crying

  36. Google doesn’t know me either.

    “Karen Walrond blogs for 10 years and has nothing to show for it.”

  37. I’m so glad to see you’re not a douche. Wouldn’t it have been a disappointment to have found that out, after not knowing? 🙂 You’re brave! Not always easy to google yourself . . . bravo.

  38. I hope it doesn’t know me, but just to be safe…I think I’ll leave it a mystery.

    walks away and stares back hard at computer

    Great. Now there’s something else to not look up when I can’t sleep…

  39. The Bloggess is my co-pilot! Once again, you’ve struck gold on the internet, Jenny. My results:
    s h is currently available for massage by appointment
    s is half manx and half american short hair
    s is always on top
    s is so afraid of germs
    s is attacked and knocked out as she cases his candy store
    s is bad
    s is one of them
    s is reaching infamy for kissing just about everyone on the roster
    s is clearly uninformed
    s is a fount of useless knowledge
    s is a professional bounty
    s is the whre of all whres
    I don’t even know… I must have a name that is a popular alias for prostitutes. Lmbo!

  40. Google didn’t know me. So I tried just my first name, and discovered why…..

    “Christa is survived by her parents”

  41. brigette is a 10″ antique salmon colored little girl with an innocent look.

    [Oh googlism, you just don’t know me at all, do you?]

    brigette is an assasin for the others

    [Uh oh, looks like my cover is blown.]

    brigette is the splice of a blue mernorn

    [Well that about sums it up.]

  42. Schilder is working for weed, apparently because of stress, because schilder is equally candid about the rewards and the difficulties attached to ministry in a modern day prison setting.

  43. michelle is safe and dry .
    michelle is thursday
    michelle is dumb
    michelle is an adorable twenty inch

    I am safe and dry. I do not believe I am a day of the week. It’s possible I’m dumb. I am positive I’m not a scarily large but adorable sex toy.

  44. So I put in my blog name and it says here that it’s a website for thinking about our discontentment and also…”a bit less known”
    Thanks a lot Google! You’re an asshole.

  45. dana is back weedy wednesday smoke fest with dana larsen
    I actually know that Dana. I am not that Dana. dana is environmentally friendly describes me much better.

  46. Sadly, it doesn’t know me, which kinda sucks for the professor in New Zealand with the same name as me who has published all kinds of important books, and who I know about through regular Google. Which is also how my husband knows he is both a secret Communist and a secret CIA agent. So I hope anyone who has suspicions about my husband’s spy career and wants to send Jaws after us in a mini-rocket will check Googlism and not Google.

  47. I’m pretty excited about this one. “rachel is an author who renders the yeti speechless with her talents”

  48. Google doesn’t know who I am, by my nickname or my legal name. Awesome. Very reassuring when you are dealing with a crazy stalker. True story.

  49. Google doesn’t know me, either. Does this mean that I actually don’t exist? The implications of this are both troubling and intriguing.

  50. Foxy Wine Pocket, that sounds more like “Texas S&M University”.

    My own favorites:
    Googlism for: mark
    mark is the beast
    mark is real deal
    mark is paddling as fast as she can
    mark is where your pig
    mark is a monkey junkie
    mark is not 666? but
    mark is in a land of plenty
    mark is also someone’s property
    mark is serious business
    mark is in print
    mark is in
    mark is looking for some action
    mark is more than just a label
    mark is my name
    mark is permanent
    mark is just bitter
    mark is having fun now
    mark is largely ignored
    mark is paris burning
    mark is the beast oh
    mark is ready
    mark is cranky
    mark is not the man for the job
    mark is where your pig puts his/her front feet on a small box and nose in the air
    mark is revealed
    mark is climbing back up
    mark is fly this game is fly
    mark is unique
    mark is seen commonly on appliances and computer equipment
    mark is a well
    mark is bringing change
    mark is the best
    mark is
    mark is used
    mark is your mini? there is a great deal of confusion when it comes to mini marks
    mark is a golden god?
    mark is made up of 9 for assignments
    mark is featured in the readers digest and is a media favourite
    mark is registered
    mark is perceived aurally rather than
    mark is crafted of porcelain
    mark is my hero
    mark is deleted
    mark is a long
    mark is being used in
    mark is a

    Woohoo! I made it! I’m in!
    But I feel so used… 🙁
    And don’t try to rub me out, because I’m apparently immortal.

  51. Some of my favorites (without my name because I like being a nony moose)
    **** is a world
    **** is not a retard (good to know)
    **** is in peterboro and does yoga classes here
    **** is unavailable
    **** is our residential beggar
    **** is recommended
    **** is #1650

  52. kelly is indignant about something or another
    kelly is a divine goddess
    kelly is a demon

    Well, which is it google?!

    kelly is waiting patiently for you to enter her

    Really, google? Really? I just… what should I think about that last one?!

  53. kara is 4
    kara is the result of the interest expressed at kansas precision agriculture conferences (so THAT’S how I was conceived)
    kara is officially “ilandwhyte krystal kyra”
    kara is entirely run by volunteers
    kara is a tree
    kara is a straight up asshole to me to where im an asshole back (I do have my moments)

  54. I don’t know what Googlism thought about me because I was too impatient to wait for the goddam page to load. But that probably tells us everything we to know anyway.

  55. My computer is acting weird and submiting comments before I’m ready. First of all, I meant that probably tells us everything we *need to know anyway. And also I was TRYING to check the little box that lets me include my latest blogpost. GUH. Okay it’s not going to let me. Nevermind then.

  56. jeanne is a small slightly built young woman possessing the almost physical perfection that is typical of the selkie people

  57. they stopped updating the google results on that website years ago. so my entry will forever be “_____ is the ugliest” based on a forum post by a kid I went to highschool with. joy.

  58. Googlism doesn’t know me at all. I feel that is actually a very accurate description of my introverted home-body self.

  59. Kenzie is a regular monkey.
    Most of the rest were about dogs, toddlers, or men. I’m so confused am I really the only adult human female with my mane in existence???

  60. “The Bloggess is my copilot” is a much better answer to those droll “God is my copilot” thumper stickers han the snarky “Dog is my copilot” drivel. I mean, honestly, you have opposable thumbs, dogs don’t. And I’ve met few dogs with your discerning taste in taxidermy and Princess Bride quotes. You rule, dogs drool.

  61. My actual first name is rather unusual, so I tend not to share it online very much (because I’m super paranoid like that). And it happens to be the same as a well known Southeast Asian porn star, and a minor tv personality, so the results are always interesting. Here are the highlights.

    …is back as a mute
    …is hasselhoff’s leading lady
    … is searching the bushes along the entrance to the main dining room for speakers to prove her point
    …is a bona fide 18 year old schoolgirl with big brown bedroom eyes
    …is trapped on the roof and is so grateful when i rescue her that she bj’s me
    …is looking at him bemusedly
    …is irked
    …is just one of 1600 young hairy models you can see inside atk’s natural & hairy members area
    …is a frenzy of guitar licks

  62. when I put it in my full name it didn’t recognize me either – apparently I don’t exist? – but when I did only my first name it said I was dead. not sure which is worse.

  63. test 1 : ororo is practically a goddess given her powers and should act more accordingly
    test 2 : harry potter is teaching your children satanism and witchcraft
    test 3 : jenny lawson is awesome

    conclusion : this googlebox sure has had some freaky nightmares and thus should not be allowed to watch dvds alone just yet, but when it comes to talking about real people, it’s a truth teller.

  64. Booh! Only works in English. And noone thinks anything about me in English.

    But using my first-name only, I found out I was apparently killed. Or possibly a horse and rider massuer….

  65. “Sorry, Google doesn’t know joshilyn jackson”
    That’s all it said. The end. Finito.
    To be fair, Google is NOT alone, but damn, it still smarts.

  66. At first I thought Googlism was protecting me from hurt feelings, but then I saw that “The Bloggess broke Googlism”. Thank you for protecting me, Jenny!!

  67. I bet you are a lot of people’s copilots! I know your blog has helped me navigate unfriendly skies some days 🙂 Also laughed out loud at West Texas one.

  68. I am SO EXCITED! I have two understudies backing me up if I’m out! SO I can, without guilt, get on a plane and leave my Teenagers From Hell! Yessssssssss

  69. Ha! Am massively pleased to announce that Googlism has no idea who or what or where I am. Take that, giant corporation who has to remind itself not to be evil with signs in the office.

  70. sue is human
    sue is going au natural
    sue is the largest
    sue is great
    sue is handling the $$$
    sue is coming to fresno

    Evidently I am taking a trip to Fresno in the nude & handing out money – lol

  71. “Jess is dying”
    “Jess is psycho gay fencing bitch”
    “Jess is an Australian kelpie.”

    I really can’t beat the Australian Kelpie thing, so I’m sticking with that. It needs to be my new signature line…

  72. Apparently I only exist under my maiden name… either that or I broke the internet. Both are possible.

  73. Mine were all obscene:
    stacey lynn is adult elf pics
    stacey lynn is celeb male teens in underwear
    stacey lynn is free naked ladies pictures
    stacey lynn is cock fighting illinois
    stacey lynn is hot older pussy
    and I am 100% positive I was not cock fighting in Illinois! I have no comment on the others. 🙂

  74. I think your fans are mobbing the site…after my first hit on my maiden name, none of us in the department can get any results. Oh wait, my boss got something…. it says she’s internally bleeding. Yikes.
    And it’s official “Google doesn’t know mary lastname.”
    We’ll all go back to work now.

  75. Hmm, I just can’t decide which I like more:

    danielle is a sassy little 13 3/4″ sable & white bitch who thinks that everyone should stop and pet her
    danielle is about 15 inches tall and is a soft ragdoll dressed in a schoolgirl’s blue plaid dress with a yellow collar and red piping around the waist

  76. “Jenny Lawson is an award.” It must have been pretty rough trying to accept yourself as an award. Where are you going to put you? On a shelf? Hung on a wall? Jeez, just give me a plaque and a cupcake!

    -Sorry, Google doesn’t know eve i ate your damn apple

  77. Google doesn’t know me. This means I have done a fabulous job of separating my online life from my real life. This makes me proud. 🙂

  78. Googlism for: naomi

    naomi is latest fame casualty
    naomi is broke
    naomi is feeling
    naomi is one of the most touching
    naomi is latest fame casualty by tv plus reporters
    naomi is set to leave the north london mansion on monday morning
    naomi is my wonderful german shepherd
    naomi is now three years old
    naomi is mounted at the wht’s ghril nasmyth focus
    naomi is a joint project of the isaac newton group
    naomi is a member of the international association of women composers and ascap
    naomi is past president of nsa and chair of the international center for speaking in tempe
    naomi is embittered by the fate hashem has inflicted upon her
    naomi is my younger sister by 6 years i think
    naomi is the kind of person who spots a photo opportunity at a glance and if you go looking for her
    naomi is a very strong
    naomi is not taking orders for custom art
    naomi is located within two hours driving time of philadelphia
    naomi is easily accessible any season of the year
    naomi is one of the most touching in terms of human relationships in the bible
    naomi is also now making a name for herself in the world of film and television
    naomi is a grammy award
    naomi is
    naomi is signed to gut on a long
    naomi is a popular teacher
    naomi is also an example of a believer who encounters and struggles through hard times
    naomi is set during world war ii in new york
    naomi is a 23 year
    naomi is beginning to grab things too
    naomi is the wife of elimelech
    naomi is connected to the following things
    naomi is connected to because
    naomi is determined to find this treasure and spends much time looking and dreaming and even researching treasure hunters at the local library
    naomi is feeling rebellious and upset
    naomi is responsible for developing compelling and durable web
    naomi is by naomi campbell
    naomi is also making a name for herself in the world of film and television
    naomi is a distinctive beauty whose sophisticated and sultry look has made this model/actress an international celebrity
    naomi is just how beautiful the music is that they create
    naomi is a japanese female name that means “above all beauty”
    naomi is founder and host of the women alive
    naomi is thinking
    naomi is 23 years old and in college in arizona
    naomi is 36
    naomi is certainly the number one choice for any arcade developer at the moment
    naomi is on dr
    naomi is skilled in getting to the core of the issue and guiding her clients to free themselves from paralyzing behaviors and self sabotaging coping styles
    naomi is known or famous for?
    naomi is certainly not camera shy
    naomi is intended to bridge the gap between pure forecasting models whose forecasts are often difficult to interpret and dynamic general equilibrium models
    naomi is al iets dikker en haar tepels beginnen iets op te zwellen
    naomi is al lekker uitgezakt
    naomi is hanging out in front of a suggestive piazza nettuno
    naomi is geboren
    naomi is one of a handful of children in the country with early onset cockayne syndrome
    naomi is 28 inches tall
    naomi is? naomi is happy
    naomi is hollywood’s ‘next big thing
    naomi is so
    naomi is a biblical name from
    naomi is currently a guest on radio and television shows throughout the united states and england
    naomi is a licensed marriage and family therapist and an advanced clinician with the imago relationship therapy organization
    naomi is wearing a “fantasy” kimono outfit from volks
    naomi is running on a trail along the sabbathday river where she spies what
    naomi is a sitting doll
    naomi is a welcome addition to the reign
    naomi is an exceptional executive who has totally committed herself to the fight against hiv/aids
    naomi is the only child in scotland who suffers from giant axonal neuropathy
    naomi is very organized
    naomi is a senior from new york
    naomi is the lead programmer on staff
    naomi is someone he likes
    naomi is frightened by everything and everybody
    naomi is the founder and president of the face language international and has opened centers in the united states and england
    naomi is in a battle with the backdraft group’s gold team
    naomi is a 76 element segmented mirror
    naomi is deeply disturbed
    naomi is the story of a haunting in the subways of manhattan
    naomi is a deconstructed and modern
    naomi is too old for marriage
    naomi is currently pursuing her ms degree in hospitality industry studies at new york university
    naomi is a very sociable cat
    naomi is the author of “swan” and the self
    naomi is available at subterranean press
    naomi is the daughter of peter watts
    naomi is caught between two men
    naomi is a highly successful “people person
    naomi is the author of several books
    naomi is seeing doug socially but not often
    naomi is continually caught between the knowledge of her sometimes fraudulent methods and her hopeful faith that perhaps
    naomi isaacs & franz dannerbauer
    naomi is usually clad in a pair of baggy

  79. I don’t usually post but Googlism had some very NSW things to say about my name. o_O

  80. Apparently, I am nothing more than a set of creepy acronyms:

    LISA: Library and Information Science Abstracts is an international abstracting and indexing tool designed for library professionals and other information specialists. LISA currently abstracts over 440 periodicals from more than 68 countries and in more than 20 different languages.

    LISA: Laser Interferometer Space Antenna, a proposed space mission concept designed to detect and accurately measure gravitational waves

    LISA Academy (Little Scholars of Arkansas), a public charter high school in Little Rock, Arkansas

    LISA: Local Indicators of Spatial Association, statistics that evaluate the existence of clusters in the spatial arrangement of a given variable…WTF?

    And also a few other notable things:

    Tropical Storm Lisa (disambiguation), various hurricanes, cyclones and a tropical storm

    Lisa (mythology), a creator deity in Dahomeyan religion

    Apple Lisa computer, the precursor to the Apple Macintosh

    LISA: A computer game: “A GAME ABOUT SACRIFICE. SURVIVAL. AND PERVERTS. Preorder LISA the Painful RPG now!”

    The last is my favorite, but still I’m a bit confused. Am I a painful “Rocket Propelled Grenade” or better, could I be a painful, but Really Pretty Girl? No matter, as I seem to have all the basics covered – Sacrifice (yes!), Survival (OK, good for me), and Perverts (who knew?).

    I may be dis-ambiguous, but I am a storm of epic proportion. This I already suspected I had in common with you. I am a lot of things I never could have imagined. I think some of these things point to a seriously high level of intelligence. My day is absolutely complete.

  81. Appparently I’ve learned to cook athletically while buried in my (non-existent) trailer:

    tacy is in the trailer cooking dinner
    tacy is also buried there
    tacy is very athletic

    Thanks for another great diversion Jenny!

  82. First googlism… Annette is right.

    FINALLY! I think that makes me super officially always right… because google said so! OMG I’m going to use that on my kids! Instead of “because I said so” it will be “because GOOGLE said so”

  83. some of my favourites:

    erica is stimulating the penis of her husband
    erica is a saucy tart who needs punishment
    erica is now known in zimbabwe as a gwenyambira
    erica is terrified of her real self
    erica is probably a madam in this setting
    erica is agressively affectionate
    erica is a beautiful woman with shapely long legs and a terrific bottom
    erica is being pressured by her gang pals for focusing on school and distancing herself from the gang life
    erica is a talented sunflower painter and super mario player

  84. Hmmmmmmm……….
    mandy is here
    mandy is a “girl on top” edit picture added 8/9 {hahaha}
    mandy is cute
    mandy is such a special girl
    mandy is the daughter of colin atkinson
    mandy is toting candy canes in her backpack {How did you know google?!?}

    All right then, thanks googlism.

  85. I ran both my Internet handle and my real first name. My favorite from each:
    Solstice is utterly terrifying in its plausibility. (damn right!!)
    [Real name] is cooler than you fool’s. (particularly appreciate the misplaced apostrophe in this one)

  86. What the hell is a “wimp tin”? I doubt it’s a good thing. I’m also not Courtney Love so there’s that.

  87. Google thinks I am a 76 year old lady or a lesbian. One of these is true.

  88. Mine should say “Amber is kinda bummed.” Because I am. Most of mine had to do with fossilized resin or porn. Why do porn stars and strippers always pick the name Amber?!? Bitches.

  89. Apparently I am simultaneously an 8th grade student, a teacher and “the best female artist I have seen this year.”
    THAT made my year. 🙂

  90. “Ruth is a destitute “huffer”? Addicted to glue”

    So obviously, in the throes of huffing, I must have created your last The Bloggess googlism. Sorry about that. I can be rather b*tchy when I’ve got the glue.

  91. Funny thing, due to the child safety crap we’ve got on our network I can’t go to that site. But then I had to have my husband put in a special exemption for this page.

  92. So you know the other day how I posted I had 4 cats? I don’t, I have 3. Something happens when I get finished reading your blog and I become drunk I guess. 😉

  93. Sorry, Google doesn’t know Alie Kriofske.
    I think Google just had a little too much to drink and is feigning ignorance.

  94. My first name (apparently, I don’t exist if I use both names) came up with a string of pornographic phrases that made me blush. I guess Gina is a popular name for Porno Queens…

  95. I’m a permanent staff member of development alternatives

    …and don’t you forget it!

  96. I apologize for the double post,but I think I win something here. Good lord…

    paige is a smashing success as fm muhammad shines
    paige is simply shania
    paige is my fetish
    paige is
    paige is a faerie girl
    paige is back”
    paige is a miss teen usa judge
    paige is smashing success as fm muhammad shines
    paige is a 14 1/2″ sable & white bitch
    paige is the best
    paige is a pattern of ones and zeroes
    paige is post a comment name
    paige is a faeriegirl
    paige is a spayed female
    paige is also actively involved with impact
    paige is a computer program that generates patient educational material and instructions for treatment and follow up
    paige is produced by mad scientist software
    paige is not emmett
    paige is unlikely to shy away from controversial issues and is well
    paige is doing exactly what he was hired to do and that is to denigrate the public schools as much as he can because that is the bush agenda
    paige is credited with establishing houston as one of the nation’s top urban school districts
    paige is on her way to a sure take over of the european music scene
    paige is recording an album that is self
    paige is the son of public school educators
    paige is responding more
    paige is responding to the treatments
    paige is not happy
    paige is caring
    paige is on this web site if there is information you cannot find on this site
    paige is the oldest player to play in the
    paige is caught kissing jack and she is confronted
    paige is not a regular in testifying before committees
    paige is on its side
    paige is back”
    paige is in the middle pushing a stroller with balthazar in it
    paige is brought from a black background to her four friends behind him
    paige is a virtuoso
    paige is a prodigy known to musicians on both sides of the atlantic
    paige is a member of the board of directors of the south shore women?s business network and previously served on the board of boston
    paige is impressed with how the students have excelled at the seahawks academy
    paige is a member of the florida retail federation board of directors
    paige is our newest coach and assists with our school assembly programs
    paige is a tall guy that teaches grade ѕ
    paige is disfigured
    paige is the black tri bitch of my dreams
    paige is the successor to paige
    paige is shown here with vanderbilt university chancellor gordon gee as he welcomes him during a visit by paige as part of his cross
    paige is an elite gymnast
    paige is a very talented elite gymnast currently training at parkettes gymnastics in allentown
    paige is committed to evangelizing her peers and has found an outlet in music
    paige is afflicted with a rare genetic disorder called goldenhar syndrome
    paige is a very private person
    paige is the self
    paige is an empty suit who had no role in bush’s “no child left behind” reform
    paige is an impressive man
    paige is the newest edition to the haliwell family
    paige is a story about complacency and self
    paige is the youngest daughter of my late brother
    paige is so frustrated in his new job that he is considering retiring
    paige is responsible for the overall operational and fiscal integrity of bse
    paige is not a stressed child
    paige is an expert cryptographer trapped in a miserable job at a technology company
    paige is a young atlanta singer whose first single
    paige is afraid to take the risk getting into lance’s pickup
    paige is credited with raising student test scores
    paige is in charge of the pollen laboratory and its integration into the studies
    paige is the one who backstabs and bad mouths everybody else on the show
    paige is one of the best pure athletes in college football
    paige is no longer in need of hospital care but not responsive to commands to send her to a rehab hospital
    paige is wrong
    paige is a breath of fresh air
    paige is highly regarded by her clients
    paige is giving away 100% free subscriptions to his weekly all the profit secrets letter
    paige is the woman in the video
    paige is the point man for a new federal education plan that proponents call the most sweeping change in
    paige is 14 years old and lives in colleyville
    paige is known for her role of venus in the bbc broadcast of kurt weill’s one touch of venus in london
    paige is the right person
    paige is no stranger to science competitions
    paige is set to share her distinctive take on pop music
    paige is working tirelessly on the next mars surveyor program
    paige is an extremely talented gymnast and i think she will be a major contender in the years leading up to the 2008 olympics
    paige is our first grandchild
    paige is 5’5″ and weighs 120 lbs
    paige is relatively unknown in the uk but she enjoys a far bigger reputation in her home country of america
    paige is back to prove she can enthrall and entice with her new pop fare
    paige is about a troubled teen in a troubled family with a troubled past
    paige is really
    paige is the eerily mature caretaker who keeps up the appearance of normalcy
    paige is the president of ictus development
    paige is a professional uk based independent escort
    paige is going to be
    paige is half
    paige is 3 now and while everyday is a different challenge for her and us as well
    paige is a member of the staff
    paige is dorothy on halloween 1997
    paige is hardly a voucher wet blanket

  97. Ok well that’s weird seeing one of my tweets to you word for word as one of Google’s top results for you… I guess zombie katanas are more bloggess than originally thought!

  98. Apparently, I’m survived by my wife. So, I’ve got that going for me.

  99. “kate is the product of a wealthy home and her mother despairs of ever seeing her settled down like a good daughter”

    Oddly specific.

  100. So, I tried googlism and it said it was sorry but it didn’t know me…. So true, google, so true….

  101. Here’s a few interesting ones for my name:
    – mana is the energy that flows through the universe
    – mana is a high ranking apocalypse demon
    – mana is a seventh attribute possessed only by traditional wizards and rogues
    – mana is graphically magnificent
    mana is about as useful as a piano man without fingers

    Yup – that just about sums me up!

  102. Jaclyn is….
    ….perky perky perky and that’s that
    …hilarious sometimes
    …breathing a big sigh of relief
    …a very kind and sweet feline
    …ready to learn the songs of weaving?

  103. Regina George… How does Googlism begin to explain Regina George?
    Regina George is flawless.
    I hear her hair’s insured for $10,000.
    I hear she does car commercials… In Japan.
    Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
    One time she met John Stamos on a plane… and he told her she was pretty.
    One time she punched me in the face… It was awesome.

  104. I love these! Absolutely spot on—captures me to a “tee.”

    melissa is an atheist
    melissa is head and shoulders above the rest
    melissa is the bomb diggetty
    melissa is a single mexican woman from hermosillo
    melissa is actually not a bad girl
    melissa is a blonde haired little slut
    melissa is developed as a robotic platform for the flying robot project
    melissa is debating whether to wear shoes on the plane
    melissa is fluent in creole
    melissa is now married to bruce boxleitner
    melissa is short
    melissa is an idiot

  105. Some good ones in here. The creepiest one is- peeking at her through the window.

    Googlism for: ricky

    ricky is trying to murder
    ricky is king
    ricky is embraced by
    ricky is a winner
    ricky is livin la vida generosa
    ricky is 21 at cheap
    ricky is hot
    ricky is 2
    ricky is a wigga and loves vicky williams
    ricky is dead
    ricky is the coolest
    ricky is a buddie again
    ricky is 21 by rick nelson music
    ricky is trying to murder her
    ricky is one of the most interesting people you will ever encounter in your life time
    ricky is trying to murder her” date filmed
    ricky is trying to murder her a misunderstood conversation between ricky and his agent leads lucy to the conclusion that he is
    ricky is getting married in october
    ricky is perfect
    ricky is embraced by teammates
    ricky is 21
    ricky is the man
    ricky is livin la vida generosa ricky martin to play charity concert
    ricky is one of the classic comedic archetypes
    ricky is a major player
    ricky is 1 up hole 3 is a par 3 ricky shoots first and lands 13 ft from the pin paul just misses a long putt and ricky misses the 13 footer paul misses par
    ricky is
    ricky is comming to montreal march 23th 2000
    ricky is home again
    ricky is an avid reader who’s loves researching topics and people that interest him
    ricky is sentenced to a maximum
    ricky is a wigga
    ricky is losing interest in her ethel refers to the book
    ricky is trying to murder her”
    ricky is not a bad kid? staff reports
    ricky is no ordinary prisoner
    ricky is so romantic and sensual
    ricky is so loved and missed by family and friends
    ricky is a movie with a singular claim to fame
    ricky is bomb
    ricky is having a great season
    ricky is based on an incredibly obscure manga and anime
    ricky is just another inmate
    ricky is capable of leading the league in rushing
    ricky is die dag vanaf half 3 vrij
    ricky is back
    ricky is immediately smitten
    ricky is playing for
    ricky is something of an old hand when it comes to the stock market
    ricky is a handsome
    ricky is the associate editor and contributing author for the 2001 “maintenance engineering handbook” by mcgraw
    ricky is watching from across the lawn
    ricky is a reckless
    ricky is “all man”
    ricky is up for auction on ebay taken during a 1999 trip in new york
    ricky is more devoted to his fans than anyone i know
    ricky is not so busy anymore
    ricky is so extraordinary in his card manipulation
    ricky is my dog’s name and he is eleven years old
    ricky is a true gentlemen away from the television
    ricky is quite popular amongst the ladies
    ricky is one of the many persons served by ucpa
    ricky is as good as mike
    ricky is a sweetie
    ricky is a bourkes parakeet and we’ve had him about four years
    ricky is nu te horen op radio 1
    ricky is passionate about quilting and is delighted to share his experience and enthusiasm with quilters at every level of expertise
    ricky is nominated at the 44 annual grammy awards for his duet with christina aguilera “nobody wants to be lonely” in the
    ricky is now up for the no bull 5 in october at talladega
    ricky is jolly violent and gory
    ricky is in his room filming her through his window
    ricky is desperate for an apache dancer for his new routine at the tropicana
    ricky is the
    ricky is the voice behind the cup of life
    ricky is schizophrenic
    ricky is a very large
    ricky is so cool he teaches dance at dunchurch school he sometimes gets mad mostly at the lads because they sit and drool
    ricky is more than a sex
    ricky is way too humble to tell you how good he is so i will
    ricky is the son of morris laahty and sadie deyuse laahty and a grand
    ricky is certainly one of the most unique movies i have ever seen
    ricky is on the list and you can go to the official grands
    ricky is hand fed wedding cheesecake by amy
    ricky is a stickler for order
    ricky is actually at the squat getting increasingly drunk and being shamelessly flirted with by theresa
    ricky is my only son
    ricky is sent to prison
    ricky is jolted back to the present with the famed “drivers
    ricky is totally to original specification
    ricky is living at darlynn’s darlins
    ricky is not the disciplined hard worker his neo
    ricky is so confident that he is most likely to come down the track and hit the ball back past the bowler in the very first over of spin he plays
    ricky is 6th generation solid red color on his dam’s side
    ricky is immediately beset by bully inmates
    ricky is a
    ricky is most noted for being an accomplished songwriter
    ricky is 21 by rick nelson information
    ricky is instructing us on correct body positioning when entering into a corner
    ricky is producing a latin boyband
    ricky is approved by the suzuki association of the america’s to be certified through book 4

    © 2003 – 2010

  106. Whoa, I am THE PEOPLE’S MAYOR!
    If only I had known. I feel like an apology is in order.

  107. I went with just my first name this time and got some results:
    Selected results:
    chris is tired of the whole “boyband” thing and is leaving *nsync to start a rock band
    chris is run on microsoft’s most powerful database
    chris is also president of dog writers association of america
    chris is the all mighty god of the gods
    chris is our god
    chris is returned to an upright position

  108. Shelley is a smelly cunt. Wait, what? And modest but necessary, and shocked by phone sex. But my favorite? Shelley is a living example of how the human spirit can never be defeated. Apparently even when I’m a smelly cunt.

  109. “marissa is chased by several hit men while trying to find enough evidence to convince the authorities of the deadly scheme and stop the looming epidemic”

    I really want to know what epidemic I’m trying to prevent.

  110. I think I’m just going to continuing living in oblivion about what the world and google think of me. It’s much easier to believe I’m loved if I don’t know the truth.

  111. Googlism for: adria bowman

    Sorry, Google doesn’t know adria bowman

    Ummm. If you need me I’ll be over here in this corner, being forever alone.

  112. “TheBloggess is threatened by my beauty and success and threatened to “cut me bad” if I didn’t drop out of the scene.”

    That one was my far.

  113. My favorites from mine were: amy lee is a porcelain doll with baptist fangs and amy lee is definitely a force to be reckoned with…….UNTIL, I got to the very end: amy lee is multi orgasmic

    That one is definitely not me…..

  114. Google didn’t know me at all until I dropped my last name… and then it was magical!

    nici is a dual beam differential imager with a dedicated adaptive optics system and a low scatter optical system optimized to take advantage of various
    nici is involved in research on visual perception
    nici is a line of plush with personality
    nici is ideal for trace level analyses of target compounds in complex matrices
    nici is pleased to support this online forum because of the fundamental importance
    nici is quickly turning into one of the hottest porn queens to make it on (<-To be fair, I knew something like this was out there. There used to be a porn site under my full name.)
    nici is missing or corrupt
    nici is part warm instrument and part cold instrument with a focal plane mask that obscures the central

    But this is the only one that sounds like the really real me:
    nici is an outstanding young lady who is friendly and encouraging to everyone

  115. Did u find me?!
    Don’t fill in any info below (email, website, etc..) Stay anonymous.
    This should work for now. We can go back and forth. These will be deleted automatically every couple of days. But its anonymous, so no major worries.
    We need better ways to tell each other that something is waiting. Like, mention anything about animals and I’ll know ubr changed a profile or pic on NG. Mention a date, and I’ll know here and where to look.
    I’ll keep looking for better options. Be super careful on texting! :# I’ll be better at not appearing to have a one way conversation. 😀
    BTW, u can maybe temp post /pix memes here???
    Lmk on text if u found this and then we’ll game plan here.

  116. Yuri is evil. Yuri is master. Yuri is back with a vengeance! Yuri is planning to clone world leaders. Yuri is controlling his mind! Yuri is more than capable of utilizing all the weapons at their disposal! Yuri is finally getting his way. Yuri is brilliant. Yuri is a newcomer to the hit man business but he tries his hardest. Yuri is a crackpot and anybody who believes this nonsense probably won’t believe the truth either. Yuri is once again on the rampage! Yuri is still at large with his army of brains. Yuri is trying to take revenge on you. Yuri is the “ultimate corruptor.” Yuri is extremely valuable to the continuation of brain slice research. Yuri is a specialist creating bladed weapons while maintaining an element of sculpture in all of his works. Yuri is the one standing next to her with the large sword. Yuri is a very active and friendly cat.
    I love my name.

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