Happy Halloween from Game of Thrones. Sort of.

I bought my Halloween costume months ago because I fell in love with the sleeves and Victor was like “Who are you supposed to be?” and I didn’t really have a good answer so I just said, “Game of Thrones.  I’m going as Game of Thrones.”  Then he said, “You can’t be ‘Game of Thrones‘.  You can’t be a whole tv show.”   But I disagree because technically I don’t know who I’m dressed as.  I just liked the outfit.  But Victor kept pushing for an answer so I was like, I’m Game of Thrones.  I’m a really important character who George R.R. Martin hasn’t actually invented yet.  She’s super bad-ass.  I’m cutting-edge, futuristic Game of Thrones.”  

I don’t have a picture of me wearing it but it’s this:

I look just like this but with less hair and more everything else.
I look just like this but with less hair and more everything else.

Then he stared at me as if I was crazy, and I was like, “She’s a mysterious stranger with a dark secret.  She likes pina-coladas and getting caught in the rain.  She avoids weddings.  I don’t know, Victor.  I DON’T KNOW GEORGE R.R. MARTIN’S END GAME.”  And then Victor shook his head, but technically I could have said I was any current character and he wouldn’t be able to dispute it because there are so many characters now we’ve pretty much renamed Game of Thrones: “Wait.  Who is that?  Is that girl new?  What’s happening again?  Are you sure we’re even watching the right show?”  

(And also, I sort of look like Maester Luwin but without the necklace, or the penis.)

 Then Victor was like “I can’t believe you spent money on burlap.  Long-sleeved burlap.” and I was like, “THE LONGEST SLEEVES.  SLEEVES FOR DAYS!” and he said “This is Texas.  You’re going to get heatstroke” and I stared at him and whispered, huskily: 

Winter is coming.”  

Then he shook his head at my idiocy and I smiled and reminded him that “Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.”  Or at least that’s what I’d like to say happened, but I can never think of the right quotes to use at the time and I was distracted because Ferris Mewler started chasing after my sleeves because he thought they were cat toys and he was hanging off the end of one while I tried to shake him loose, screaming: “MY DIREWOLF HAS BETRAYED ME” and then Victor just walked away.

Hailey, on the other hand, loved my costume and decided we should match and I explained I was dressed like a non-existent character from a book about bad-ass warriors and dragons and danger, so she picked out a Viking Guard costume because she thought it would be a good fit with mine.  (We also created a very complicated back-story for each of our characters but I can’t write it all here because I don’t know how litigious George R.R. Martin is.)

Anyway, Hailey’s costume came in last week and Victor said, “Cool.  Are you supposed to be a Norse Warrior?” and she was like, “Nope.  I’m Game of Thrones.”

haileywarrior

She comes by it naturally.

Happy Halloween, y’all.

warriorhailey

212 thoughts on “Happy Halloween from Game of Thrones. Sort of.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. Just go with Badass and leave it at that. Shouldn’t that be a character from a GRRM book anyway?

  2. Just a note from someone who made a costume with massive sleeves…. they are a bit when you need to pee…. 🙂

  3. Good Lord, Jenny, she TOTALLY looks like you. You two should just go out in matching outfits and you could be Dr. Evil and Mini Me.

    1. This post is an excellent example of the ways in which you’re a good, readable writer.
    2. I’m impressed with the way your wood floor doesn’t reflect the fact that you have pets.
    3. I have a pet (a yellow lab named William Teddy. Who I love.), and in my world, your daughter’s boots vividly reflect what my wood floors look like on a daily basis.
  4. Halloween is meant for you to be whoever you want. And convince other people, or beings, into doing the same. Case in point- my Greyhounds got to be Star Wars creatures. Because Halloween. 🙂
    http://i.imgur.com/yORBdfml.jpg

    Good on you all for doing your Game of Thrones. 🙂 Because- awesome as always.

    And thanks for the gravy. 🙂

  5. This is the best ever. Way better than the office troupe of bad puns that we’ve got wandering around here (me included).

  6. That rocks! I love both! You should also tell him it is better for you to be an unknown in the Game of Thrones universe because you don’t want to be killed off by the author!

  7. I just can’t believe how well Hailey pull’s off being Game of Thrones!!! She is by far the cutest Game of Thrones I have ever seen!!!!

  8. Thank thank thank you for the morning laugh out loud. With all the shit going on in Canada this week I NEEDED it. Happy Halloween, and I hope George Martin is madly retyping his end game as we speak to include your and Hailey’s character.

  9. I’m thinking of going out as The Mountain. Only because it’s so much fun ripping peoples’ faces apart and stuff. (Uh, did that sound too murderous? Maybe I should change it up. Go as Littlefinger. ‘Cause he’s not homicidal at all.)

  10. I NEED that dress, BECAUSE SLEEVES VICTOR! Oops I live alone and I don’t feel the need to explain my art to you Warren, um, I mean Victor, uh I mean the internet. Oh I’m sorry was I shouting? I get excited about costumes, nothing to see here, move along people.

  11. Love this! Also? I’m a huge fan of dagged sleeves. It’s one of my favorite parts of medieval and Renaissance period clothing. It looks bad ass AND I have something to fidget with if I’m bored/anxious/pondering hiding in the bathroom. >_> So, total win-win. Also, if you’re at a frigid SCA event in the winter in Indiana or Michigan, the dress styles that have dagged sleeves also have enough room in the skirt for giant, poofy fleecy pajama pants to help you stay warm (or to convince you to leave the house as your girlfriend is trying to coax you into doing so), so basically, fleece pants also serve double duty and that is awesome.

    You and Hailey are both awesome and frankly, I say you’re both onto something. Don’t commit to one character (because havens know G.R.R.M. has nooo trouble killing characters); let your mood draw you in the direction you want to go! Feeling imperious and maybe a touch bitchy? Cersi it is. Want to be a know it all? Play a gender bending maester. Want to be totally bad ass? Find a short sword and become Arya! Want to be totally mysterious? Future character! You’re totally doing it right, no matter what Victor says. 😛

  12. Whenever someone asks what I am, (and there’s not a costume yet, I like the last minute freak out,) I’m gonna say GAME OF THRONES. and my son is being a ringwraith, but if I tell him to say Game Of Thrones too, he might do it….

  13. Stay away from those luminary bags in that outfit. Unless you want to be the “Flaming” Game of Thrones.

  14. Dear Victor,

    The more of her behavior you accept the less you have to forgive.

    Another Spouse who gets it

  15. Love it! I’ll have to add something like that to my ever growing ren faire garb stuff. And WHY do we have to BE SOMEONE (Who are you supposed to be?)? We are in a costume and it’s a representation of something not necessarily someone. Mine’s a hybrid Hunger Games Renaissance warrior archer, so there. 😉

  16. Your kid is freaking adorable. And that’s saying something because I usually view children with the same suspicion I reserve for week old bread and people holding pamphlets who knock on my door on Saturday afternoon.

  17. I can’t believe the oppression you deal with on a daily basis. You cannot stop awesome. Ever.

  18. Well I think it’s perfect. Victor, think of it as a genre. Just like all the zombies you see out there are Walking Dead or Shaun of the Dead and all wizards are Harry Potter. Personally, I think I’ll put on a hat that has a funny quip and go as 30 Rock.

  19. Seriously awesomesauce, both of you. I’m going as the adorable version of myself this year. Which is really just me. Because I’m always freakin’ adorable. Amen.

  20. Ooh, I could say my randomly medieval, long-sleeved dress is GoT, too! Or you; but my dress is crushed velvet, not burlap. And your sleeves would eat my sleeves for breakfast. But I have a hood to hide my very much-less hair. And now I’m rambling. Time for more candy!

  21. I just finished writing a romance novel about Vikings because I was so inspired by Game of Thrones. But, like, no death at the wedding or anything, because I saved all the gruesome, horrible deaths for the end, you know, since I’m not writing a TV show and all that. So kudos on those costumes, wenches! Just be the embodiment of GoT. Victor should know better by now anyway.

  22. You are right. Victor is wrong. Young Un is wonderfully kick ass. And I love Armstreet’s stuff.

  23. I had the exact conversation with my husband about my Halloween costume. I wanted to wear my grandma’s 1950’s hat and he was like, “Who are you?” And I said, “I’m 1950’s girl.” He was like, “No. Who are you. You have to be someone.” And I’m like, “I’m The Girl Who Thinks It’s 1950.” This went on for a while. We were a little late to the party.

  24. Hailey is beautiful and precious and so are you!! Happy Halloween to my favorite Bloggess of all time.

  25. I had this conversation at my house this morning, too, except that I was “mascarade”, and then I was a medieval spy, and then I was a pumpkin fairy, and finally, it turned into “I’m an alternate universe Little Red Riding Hood off to visit my demented uncle at the pumpkin patch with a pumpkin basket of pumpkins”, which has since been simplified to “Halloween Little Red Riding Hood” since I got to work, for the sake of having to go through the “I just like it!” dialogue again… 😉

  26. Most Excellent!! I’m going a a toothless biddy hag. Photo is to horrible to share. BTW loved you on Vaginal Fantsy

  27. Hailey is just adorable. I am sure you will be too. It is SNOWING in Chicago so you would definitely not get heatstroke if you were here…..have fun.

  28. You will rule Renaissance Festival, rock Sherwood Forest Faire, and reign at Scarborough in Waxahachie!
    Looking rather great for Halloween too.

  29. Omg the Bloggess is hysterical this morning xoxox. PS dangit, where the heck did my icons n punctuation n spell-check bar go???! I want to send you a bat!!

    On Friday, October 31, 2014, The Bloggess wrote: > thebloggess posted: “I bought my Halloween costume months ago because I fell in love with the sleeves and Victor was like “Who are you supposed to be?” and I didn’t really have a good answer so I just said, “Game of Thrones. I’m going as Game of Thrones” Then he said, “You ” >

  30. Cute overload here with Hailey. May have to avert my eyes for a moment…

    Unrelated, there is a man who looks like George R.R. Martin who works in my building (for a different company, not my company). I get a little excited anytime I ride the elevator with him. Like it might really be him and I’m standing next to greatness in a suburban office building. I always want to ask, “Do you know that you look like George R.R. Martin?” but that seems kind of rude. Because maybe people say that to him all the time. Maybe he’s sick of hearing it. OK, that was I wanted to share.

    1. It’s already been established that Victor is wrong. Yes, you and Hailey can go as a show.
    2. You should accessorize and maybe “wear” one of your kitties and that will be your direwolf.
    3. I saw your fancy vagina live the other night. Very fancy shmancy. <– I never envisioned myself being able to make a remark like this…
  31. I’m going for the “whoever I damned well wanna be so stop labelling me!” look this year….Might opt for “Game of Thrones” next year though, because of reasons, burlap reasons.

  32. You are so much halloweeny-er than me. I am a lack lustre witch. My three month old is a dubious bee.

    My toddler who lives in his super hero costumes has decided to be a knight. About an hour ago. When our first trick or treaters came round he got over excited took his pants off, stole a sweet and stood in the doorway roaring at some teenagers. They were genuinely frightened.

  33. Do not mess with that child. She will cute you! LOL! I was red Sonja one year for a friend’s Halloween party and I asked her if I could help in the kitchen. She gave something, I don’t remember what, to slice for her, so I pulled out my dagger and went to work!

  34. Super jealous of both costumes. Today is the first time since I got laid off that I am super jealous of my former colleagues. My old company really got into Halloween. Today I’m the unemployed bum in a beanbag chair. Maybe this afternoon I’ll change costumes and be unemployed gal out with her friend on mat leave drinking wine at 2 in the afternoon.

  35. I don’t watch Game of Thrones, but if you and Hailey were in it, I would. You two are awesome!

  36. We were bingeing GoT before the last season, and we skipped from S2E2 to S3E3. It took us two episodes and trying to use an online character guide to figure it out, because we just figured we’d forgotten something.

  37. It looks really twirly. Also, with a few minor additions you can repurpose it and go as a Jawa for next Halloween.

  38. Oh my gosh, you and Hailey will be awesome together. Victor is just JEALOUS because he is not “Game of Thrones”. Please please post pics of you and Hailey together 🙂 Have a great Halloweeeeeen!!!! P.s. Tell Victor it snowed this am in Chicago and it’s headed your way. You will not get heatstroke. He is such a debbie downer. ha ha ha

  39. Those costumes are bodacious. (What I really mean is bad ass but didn’t feel quite right to compliment Hailey as bad ass…so. Yeah.

  40. If anyone else gives you a hard time about being Game of Thro es for Halloween, you can both say with complete conviction, “Fuck off, I’m FABULOUS!”

  41. Hailey looks great! She is Game Of Thrones! I also looooveee looooovee loooove your dress. I want one. Happy Halloween Y’all!

  42. I love that dress! I would wear it all winter! And for $229 it would bloody have to last a whole winter’s wearing too … but it is gorgeous, and I can’t stand that it’s not available in my size…:(

  43. Be careful of the sleeves. Coffee cups tend to burrow their way into the folds when you aren’t looking and then catapult their ingredients all over your mouse and keyboard when you move. Keyboards are never exactly the same after a cafe con leche.

    IT departments HATE awesome sleeves.

  44. And… we don’t get a picture of you why? Make the baffled Victor take a picture and share it with us!

    Also, didn’t you quietly lead Victor to the computer, show him the proof that “Victor is wrong,” and say, “I told you so.”

    (He’s in Japan today. But if he was here he’d be dressed in an equally ridiculous outfit which outdoes mine and Hailey’s. It has to wait until next year though because of his schedule. ~ Jenny)

  45. I think you should only be allowed to wear that costume if you go barefoot (thank goodness you’re in Texas) and walk by pointing your toes at every step.

  46. when I first looked at this on my phone I thought the picture of your daughter was a picture of you! And I love both costumes!

  47. Of course you had to buy the costume…IT’S WONDERMOUS!!! And Hailey is FANTABULOUS in her Viking costume. (Plus, she’s adorable and looks just like her Mom.) You two will rock this Halloween.

  48. Lady Burlap could absolutely be a GOT character. She’d be the best and most dressed female. Your daughter is fierce and awesome. Happy Halloween!

  49. I am wearing my arisaid (female version of a kilt) today (again). I had a lot of fun moving the bustle over so I could sit down and pee.

  50. Must have the burlap sleeves! Your daughter is beautiful!
    Now, before you kick my comment to spam let me quickly say that Christy from Running On Sober sent me over here. I bought your book on Sunday and started following your blog on Monday…I’ve been laughing ever since.
    I’m going as American Horror Story–Freak Show this year…well, I would, if I still had kiddos young enough to trick or treat. *sniff *sniff
    Nice to meet you!
    Michelle (MamaMick)

  51. Not sure if you follow “A Mighty Girl”, but I thought of you when I read about an 11-year-old Mighty Girl who created a new ‘Sisterhood of the Traveling Stormtrooper Costume’ by passing her costume on to another young girl bullied for her love of so-called ‘boy’ interests.
    https://www.facebook.com/amightygirl?fref=nf

  52. Hailey’s costume is totally kick-ass and I adore your gown – especially the sleeves – I want!!
    I also love how Hailey has your back! Awesome kid 🙂

  53. OMG Hailey’s costume is SO Game of Thrones. And it is full of awesome. All three of you rock.

  54. Like your costumes! I’m dressed as sexy Edna the slug from Monsters, Inc….as I write this very post. But since Edna’s already a total sexbomb, a sexy version should basically end the universe as we know it. I’m watching you Wazowsky…..

  55. “MY DIREWOLF HAS BETRAYED ME!” (:DDDDDDD) (Btw, you should keep Victor around. He may always be wrong, but he’s the best straight man you and Ferris Mewler have.)

    Happy International Chocolate Day (plus gravy, if you like)!

  56. Your family always has the BEST costumes! Is Victor dressing up this year? He could super glue a bunch of knives to a sweat suit and say he was going as the Iron Throne.

  57. “My Direwolf has betrayed me!” I just laughed out loud at that whole Ferris Mewler bit. Thank you!! And you look totally Game of Thrones.

  58. Jenny, that costume is fantastic! You really must post pictures of you in it after tonight. And Hailey looks fabulous, too. Although you didn’t get to use it, I loved your quote that “once you have accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.” I need to make a cross-stitch with that saying, or is it copyrighted?

  59. You guys rock! You can totally be Game of Thrones together in those costumes. You’re one of the fancy mage/priest/magic ladies, and she’s one of the warriors but not the horse-face one with big teeth. Win!

  60. If she hasn’t already, have your daughter read Lou Anders book “Frostborn.” It’s age appropriate for her, and then she can tell people her costume is Thianna (who is a total badass)

  61. See, you should be HERE. Here in the Yukon, the children have snowsuits on under their costumes. It is below freezing, and snowing. No heatstroke. And we LOVE Game of Thrones!

  62. Epic costumes, both. As far as I am concerned you are BOTH “Game of Thrones.” You are Winterfell’s answer to Melisandre (the red witch), and Hailey is Brienne of Tarth’s new apprentice.

  63. She looks exactly like you. I love Victor. I always vote for the underdog. He really doesn’t stand a chance here (but the fact is he knows it and is okay with it because you are the two women he loves most in the world and – well, that’s it. so you win. And so does he.)

  64. The apple certainly didn’t fall from the tree. Love your costume even though you’re not in it and Hailey is beautiful!!

  65. Is the cold frontslated to hit Houston? Because we’re under a freeze warning tonight. (No kidding. Yes, it was 90 degrees in Dallas last weekend. But this weekend? FREEZING. Mother Nature has gone totally bipolar. We need to stage an intervention and get her into treatment. But ANYWAY… my point is that those days-long burlap sleeves and Hailey’s fur-of-warmth are going to come in very handy if this front reaches you.

    And poor Victor will be frozen. ALAS POOR VICTOR!

  66. If Snow White’s genes were grafted onto Queen Guinevere’s genes you wouldn’t get better. Did I really just write that? Must locate my medication, I should’ve taken it months ago.

  67. Love the dress! Since you got that I now have permission to get Morticia Addams dress, I’ve been in love with that dress my whole life! Hailey’s costume is fierce! Love it!

  68. My pugs (Fred and George Weasley) went as The Pug of Lannister and Pugrick Payne. From Game of Bones. They are defending the Schmako Throne. I wish I could upload a pic.

  69. Wow! Love that dress you chose. I may have to look at that for the future–but I want them to use a model that has bigger than an 18-inch waist . . . sigh.

  70. Ok you can’t just post AWESOME FUCKING COSTUMES and not include a link to where you got them from!!! Jenny you’re breaking my heart here. I have a serious addiction to internet shopping and might suffer withdrawals if my quest for the AWESOME is thwarted. Please help!

  71. We all need the mug/mouse pad/t shirt that says, “I am the Princess Who Gets Shit Done”. Need it, please,Jenny.

  72. The sleeves alone were worth every penny. More of a bargain since they double as cat toys…

  73. During my first Halloween in scenic Athens, GA back in 1989, one of the more amusing costumes I saw was “a generic member of U2,” although I personally didn’t see a whole lot of Adam or Larry in it; it was pretty much a Bono/Edge mashup, but very well done. I know Halloween’s over, but assuming you decide to get out your garb for other events (because you paid for it, damn it, and it’s very spiffy!), just tell everyone you’re a generic character from GOT–that should work for both you and Hailey! Heck, maybe I should dig out some of my SCA garb next year and use that line myself…

  74. My only problem with Hailey’s costume is she needs a bigger buckler, the sword is fine (a gladius probably killed more people before the invention of gunpowder). You just need a slightly heavier protection since it is harder to parry with a short sword but I’m being pedantic and….why yes I am a geek and a historical reinactor. Also that outfit is frakking awesome. Also you could You could rock that GoT outfit in a picosecond!

  75. Did you see the girl who thought she couldn’t be Han Solo because she was a girl until her father said she could be any awesome character she wanted to be? So she was Han Solo and he wore a white dress and a Princess Leia wig, and they were awesome on Halloween together.
    You guys are awesome.

  76. “You can’t be ‘Game of Thrones’!”
    This is just further confirms that VICTOR IS WRONG!

  77. Gorgeous outfits, both of you. I love that we can easily get hold of this kind of stuff now. Go the internet!

    To me, your outfit immediately took me back to Marion Zimmer Bradley’s ‘The Mists of Avalon’. It looks like a pagan priestess robe. I bet it was fun to swish about in, too!

  78. Hailey is cute and I am not which probably explains why people shy away from me. Or maybe it is because when you are 6’8 and you wear animal clothes and a sword full time you tend to make people nervous.

  79. I am Game of Thrones is perfect :). Please Jenny, Please! Tell me if the fabric is soft or scritchy? I have skin issues but I NEED that costume for next Ren faire. IS it soft?

    (It’s not soft but it’s not scratchy either. It’s sweatery. ~ Jenny)

  80. I never comment because by the time I get here there are like 2934876b/& comments already and I don’t want to bore you BUT I read you at work in the morning and you always put a smile on my face. I actually laughed out loud with this one and it’s Monday, I’m at the office ALONE and it’s super boring, so thank you. For the laugh. And the dreams of kick ass warriors who are girls. Yes.

  81. A comment to the commenters — homespun linen is so not burlap! Burlap is scratchy and uncomfortable and hangs on your rosebushes to protect them from the snow. Linen is soft and “drapy” and forgiving (except of driers) and gets more comfortable as it ages.

    It makes me wish i could sew.

  82. Of course you can be a TV show. I saw someone on Halloween dressed as space. As in, the whole galaxy. If that is allowed, I’d say narrowing it down to one television show is actually pretty damn specific.

  83. I would totally wear that long sleeved burlap. Not only for Halloween but probably for days or weeks afterwards. It looks like a confidence builder.

  84. I know I’ve said this before, but I felt the need to stop by and say it again:
    I. Fucking. Love. You.

    Seriously. We do lunch every single day. That’s my Bloggess time. And if there’s nothing new, I’ll go back to read old posts, from before I found you. I don’t even know HOW I found you, but I did. And you have made me oh so happy ever since.

    You and your beautiful daughter are absolutely rocking Game of Thrones.

  85. You should check out the History Channel’s Vikings. Because it is absolutely what you both went as and it is a kick-ass show, with with kick-ass female viking warriors and ladies in beautiful drapey-burlap cloaks, who also kick-ass. Like Lagertha.

  86. My sister’s wedding dress had sleeves like that and it was awesome, which kinda sucked because we are grossly competitive and she got married last and beat me on the wedding dress.
    Ps- Hailey is beautiful

  87. I tried to dress my dog up as Sparky from Frankenweenie… I even gave myself temporary arthritis from holding the bolts to his collar until the glue set (approximately 2.5 episodes of The Vampire Diaries)… and then on the day of the Big Event… I learned the valuable lesson that Sharpie does not write on wire-haired Jack Russells and he didn’t get his “stitches” he was just a dog with bolts in his neck.

  88. The most important thing isn’t that your daughter has fantastic taste in fantasy books/tv shows (though this is true). No, the most important thing is that it meant there was one least one kid out there this Halloween NOT in G*dd@4^#d “Frozen” costume.

  89. Your daughter is awesome. I love it when you have a child who shares your interests. (I have one who shares my sense of humor and my husband just shakes his head while we roll around laughing. )

    Your dress is awesome too. 🙂

  90. She looks like mini me! Adorable! Also that burlap coat is rad. Did it itch like hell?

    (It didn’t, surprisingly. It was heavy, but about as itchy as a sweater. ~ Jenny)

  91. You can be a Game of Thrones queen/princess/slutty hooker (as opposed to wholesome hooker), but just don’t be Cersei…she porks her brother and dude, that’s just gross.

  92. I know I’m a bit behind but I wanted to say… My 5 year old daughter picked the same costume as Hailey for Halloween this year 🙂 she called it a viking warrior princess but a lot of people asked if she was game of thrones!

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