You may have accomplished more than you know.

Today I didn’t accomplish much because tv exists and I felt shitty about it but then I thought that maybe today I managed to forget something horribly scarring  forever.  I don’t know what it was but I don’t want to really think about it too hard because then maybe I’ll remember whatever it was.  This sounds like a non-accomplishment but think about all the uncomfortable things that happened to you in your life that you cringe about when they sneak into your head at 2am and are like, “Remember that time you went to high five that guy who was missing a hand and he just stared at you and it got awkward so you pretended you were just stretching?  Except, he still had one hand so why didn’t he just high five with that one?  Was that guy being an asshole for not high-fiving or was I an asshole for high-fiving?”  And obviously I still remember this particular incident but maybe I forgot something else like this, and how awesome is that?  So basically I maybe therapeutically may have made a breakthrough to get past something possibly haunting me emotionally, and maybe you did that too and you just don’t remember.  WHICH WAS THE GOAL.  Just…one that we didn’t know about.  Which makes us even more successful.  I think.

Maybe not, but I’m giving us the benefit of the doubt.  Because that’s what a healed person does.  Probably.

You win.  We all win.

Lets go watch tv.

125 thoughts on “You may have accomplished more than you know.

Read comments below or add one.

  1. A customer we know well brought his son in. His son had a huge knot on his head (permanent). I said affectionately upon meeting him, “Hey, you little knothead”. WTF. I have never called anyone else that in my life. I need TV. And therapy.

  2. Therapy comes in many forms. For me, it was calling out some dude who was rude to me at the train station this morning. I was proud of myself for basically telling him to fuck off. Unconventional therapy. It helps.

  3. I’m told that, especially in times of stress, we’re supposed to count “kept everyone (and self) alive” among daily accomplishments.

    I also managed to NOT waste a morning screaming profanities at script-bound idiots, so I’ve earned TV and wine.

  4. If that’s how this works…I mean, Gilmore girls is on Netflix…and I have a lot of shit I’d like to forget.

  5. Some days we just need to veg out! I have brain fog from my autoimmune disease, so I forget what day of the week it is more often than not… But brain fog is a blessing in disguise because the brain says fuck this shit we can’t remember what day it is so why should we remember all this crap over here in storage?

  6. I’ve successfully forgotten many things from my childhood. And the other day, my brother asked “Hey, do you remember the time at Grandma’s farm when you lifted up a board and there was a snake under it and the snake coiled up and tried to bite you? I think it had a pink belly.” Nope, didn’t remember that one, but my guess is it may have been the beginning of my lifelong phobia about snakes. Thanks, dammit!

    Apropos of absolutely nothing, do you know about Archie McPhee? I got an email from them yesterday with a cat bonnet (https://mcphee.com/collections/new/products/cat-bonnet) and immediately thought well, Jenny needs to know about that for sure.

  7. While helping an elderly person get dressed (it’s my job, I swear I don’t dress people for fun) I asked her where her other shoe was… she had one foot. Forever scarred.

  8. That is totally healing, Jenny. Like every day in the afternoon, I forget if I’ve eaten that day or not, so I eat again, or maybe not, cause I may not have eaten yet, but either way it’s a win for me, unless I get fatter, then I know I probably forgot that I ate, and then ate again. But I can’t do anything about it since I still never remember whether I ate or not, and it’s probably definitely better to eat twice than to not eat at all. Plus I’m American, so I’m expected to be fat anyway. Healing win!

  9. And here I was feeling guilty about wanting to stay in bed all day. Forget that, I’m having my own breakthrough. About what? I forgot!

  10. Hi, a now fairly famous zen meditation teacher once told us “Watching TV and drinking beer is the lowest form of contemplation.” So, maybe wine was involved? Then, there you are!!

  11. Once in high school I asked a friend if she was feeling well because I thought she looked pale. I thought I was being thoughtful. She was fine. I was a dork and hated being wrong so I pushed it and asked if she was tired. Nope. Seriously. It was so awkward and scarring aparently because I graduated from high school 25 years ago.

    I always forget the awesome stuff I do, but the dumb stuff sticks around forever.

  12. There was this one time where I was the last person to board a plane (they literally held the doors for me) and I had a window seat. I got to my row and the woman on the aisle wasn’t getting up and wanted me to scooch by. I hate that, so I said (nicely), “Do you mind getting up? I don’t want to step on your toes.” She started laughing and said, “Sweetie, I don’t have any feet.” She was a double amputee. I could not make that up if I tried.

  13. Like that time I was starting at the totally hot guy at Sea World, not realizing that his friend assumed I was staring because he was also in a wheelchair and called me out for it. My friend had to drag me away while I was just trying to let the hot guy know I was only staring because he was hot. realizes this is like awkward tweets shuts up

  14. You are so right and it’s completely on track with what has been happening to me lately! At least as a side effect (an awesome side effect!). My boyfriend and I both live with anti-social personalities, anxiety and both individual histories of depression. You wouldn’t think we would get a long, but he understands me like no one else and is my best friend. But, anywho we made a rule that we can only talk about work frustration/anger/stress and pending legal debacles over coffee creamer and sexual harassment on our commute home. Thus, creating the intention of home is for family time (with the logic that work is work and home is home, if that makes sense). I’ve found by creating this habit of when I’m allowing myself to be negative and when to not, has helped my OCD behavior with the things that upset or shame me (recent or 20 years ago). I’m finding myself having a more self confident and relaxed attitude to crap as it smacks me in the face (metaphorically). I still have to take anxiety medication and all the other tools I’ve learned to help me function in society, but I’m learning to forgive myself and give myself more credit. It’s only taken me 32 years, but I’m learning we can’t change a mistake, but you can forgive yourself. Easier said then done, it’s like one day a piece in your brain clicks into the correct spot for the first time.

  15. I’ve committed dozens (at least) of cringe-worthy infractions against the human race, but the only time I remember them is in the middle of the night when I can’t sleep. Dammit.

  16. All I did today was read your blog and procrastinate and feel really bad. I am a photographer (the one on Twitter who’s about to fire herself) and yesterday I did a really hard job that gave me a ton of hard feelings. And today, tho I sould be doing A LOT OF THINGS I did nothing but sleep and read. I was about to feel bad and tell myself how a bad professional I am. But your post came just in time. We won today! High five o/
    And thank you :3

  17. Great theory! I haven’t watched TV all summer but fall is in the air and I have no idea what I need to watch this fall/winter because I’ve been living under a rock. Apparently. So any suggestions? Anyone?

  18. Like the time in Grade 7 when a popular boy asked me to go out with him in front of everyone, and when I said “Yes”, he said, “I’m joking” and walked away. Back then I was sooo embarrassed. Now, I would have just said, “You should be so lucky.” My mantra has always been “Time wounds all heels”. Fingers crossed.

  19. I wish I had your way of getting through things. I’ve been reading FURIOUSLY HAPPY and was feeling like it was perfect timing. But the anxiety is so overwhelming for me lately that I don’t feel like I have anything in common with you to give me hope. I can’t get out of my head. The usual distractions don’t help. The depression is fully loaded. How will I ever become a functioning adult? I’m trying to make it through to my ECT treatment on Friday because that day will be some sort of relief due to the treatment knocking me out for the day.

  20. 2 things i live my life by – be teflon, guilt don’t stick- don’t mind if you’re someone else’s dinner conversation . and third and this one is new… what other people think of me is not my business,
    enjoy the day Jenny – we love you just the same.

  21. No, I didn’t forget your name. It was obviously traumatizing me and now I’ve healed myself by expunging it from my mind.

  22. I did a crap ton of things today, but I really didn’t want to. Now I’m wondering if I could have had a breakthrough if I just did what I wanted and stayed in bed with a book and tea.

  23. Some of my meds ‘affect short term memory’ holyfuck they do! I have learned to delight in the awesome surprises I set up for myself though. OH LOOK there is an apple on the workbench! Wonder who left that there….oh yeah…probably mee. Chocolate is the BEST thing to forget then find (obviously) although Honey Barbecue Fritos are pretty good too.

  24. Resonating. Right now. There’s so much I should be doing, but…a job I applied for didn’t even bother to acknowledge my application, and I’ve just managed to drag myself up out of the Pit, but I’m still teetering, so this…hurts. I’m keeping my balance, but I’m not accomplishing much as far as practical stuff goes, and that makes me feel bad, so I sway some more, and it becomes a cycle. Which I don’t have to explain, ’cause you get it.

    Anyway, I get this post, today especially. Thanks for reminding me I’m not alone in this.

  25. I had back surgery just over a month ago that I am NOT healing well from. It sucks. TV and books FTW. It’s all I’ve been doing lately.

  26. Something embarrassing I forgot once was the time when I hired a new assistant. I took him to meet all my other coworkers, & one guy held out his hand when I introduced the new guy… I couldnt figure out why his hand was out, so I put mine out too. All 3 of us clasped hands, theirs in a normal handshake, mine resting awkwardly on top of both of theirs. What in the hell I was thinking, I don’t know, but I was reminded of it after my assistant returned to work after his summer break was over. God, I wish I could accomplish erasing that from my memory for good.

  27. Today my brain thought it should dump on me for no good reason, but I beat it into submission and completed the first level of training on venomous snakes. I am feeling pretty accomplished, even though I quietly erased the things on my to-do list that never got finished.

  28. Whenever something mortifying happens I try to console myself with the thought that at some point I’ll forget about the incident. hat’s the one time my poor memory is a blessing.

    I’m so glad I’m not the only one with similar thinking.

  29. Okay. I’m using this when The Viking asks me what exactly I accomplished today sitting in front of my computer. This sounds better than ‘Fuck all’ or ‘Oh! Am I in a competition I didn’t know about?’ or ‘I convinced ABBA to get back together, Smart Guy!’ or ‘What?! Is the day over already?’ or ‘I won a Limerick competition and the prize was $17 Million dollars but you interrupted me before I could claim the prize. Way to go, Viking!’

    On second thought, maybe I won’t use your’s……not that it’s not brilliant but that last one would totally work on The Viking.

  30. Did you know this man? Or was he just some random guy on the street? It makes a difference. TV can be a source of therapy unless you are watching the bionic man, then it’s just going to take you back to the initial trauma. Choose wisely.

    Elke a.k.a The Pretty Platform

  31. Unfortunately, this post made me THINK of many of those uncomfortably, embarrassing things I’ve done/experienced/witnessed over the years! Like my brain was saying “Nope, they’re all still here!”

  32. I left the house. I took my men-sons grocery shopping with me and sang like a rockstar to one of the songs they played (Panic! At the Disco – I Write Sins Not Tragedies) and they were all, Mom, you totally hit those high notes JUST like Brandon! and I was a Cool Mom for about 5 seconds. Good day. Gotta store those moments up like a squirrel does nuts for the winter.

  33. Yesterday I learned by accident that my daughter had our granddaughter dedicated at church without inviting us recently, and it just broke my heart all over again (I didn’t even get the CHANCE to do what she wants, and I haven’t even gotten to see PICTURES!). We’re supposed to be in this holding pattern where she can just pretend I don’t exist for six months (two left), so that THEN she can decide whether to make this PERMANENT. It just BREAKS me. The last time something like this came up, I was totally incapable of functioning for at least three or four days, and prone to sobbing at everything for a week. This time, I had a rough night, but when I woke up this morning, I’m less devastated than I have been in the past. It still hurts, but it feels like I’m maybe developing perforations on that spot she shreds pretty frequently lately. So I’m calling that progress.

  34. Hey, that must be why I watched a tv show at 11:00 this morning. I never watch tv in the morning.

    I was awake at 4:00 am obsessing over an awkward moment at work. But I don’t remember what I forgot. Win!

  35. Mrldcrygrl (# 55) NO ONE has a right to treat you like that!!! Turn the tables and say they may be in YOUR life when they learn to treat you with RESPECT and find someone (even none blood related – a.k.a. a charity or become a big sister) who needs and wants love. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE UP TO SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPECTATION or JUDGEMENT. It is a horrible way to live and will waste years of your life!

    Please, I know. I walk s away, left my heart open, but walked away. You have to live for you!!

    Please, please don’t waste time – and pray for your grandchild. God can fix it and bring joy to our lives, just not always how we think. Think of “family” as “outside the box”. Those who love you and accept the beautifulness of who you are are welcomed in.

    And karma.

    Love you, friend.

  36. I used to watch old Bob Ross Joy of Painting episodes when my anxiety got out of control, but then I tried to paint…and now watching him stresses me out. Now I watch old episodes of Hoarders. Calms me right down!

  37. This sounds exactly how my day was yesterday. I was feeling like I didn’t get a damn thing done but now I know (thanks to you) that I probably accomplished all kinds of recovery, which I desperately needed. Thanks for that!!

  38. I accomplished a lot at work 🙂 they gave me a “remodel” thing that said it should take 40 hours to finish. I’m pushing 14 hours and have about 2 hours of work left on it. Either I’m amazing or the powers that be over estimated the finish time… I’m going with “I’m amazing, bitches!”

  39. Well, thanks to MarthaRae, I just wasted an hour looking through the entire Archie McFee collection…!! Funny stuff 🙂

  40. Hi all! I saw Glennon Doyle Melton for the first time on Oprah Super Soul Sun. I loved when she said, I’m not broken…the world is…and we are just trying to live in this broken place. Looks like she and Brene’ are hooking up for a show on OWN?….Jenny, do you know anything about this? I love all of you…for helping us!

  41. Some days are so rough for me, I think to myself, “All you have to do today, really, is: don’t be a dick.” (And sometimes when I’m at work, that’s a really huge feat to accomplish!) Spending a day watching TV is one of my ways to avoid being a dick. Which is definitely a good thing. 🙂

  42. Does anyone else think of something that’s random and horribly embarrassing out of nowhere and let out a groan that makes everyone in the vicinity think you’re nuts? No? Just me? Yeah, I was afraid of that. O.o

  43. I keep hoping that some day I’ll forget that I was pregnant and had a miscarriage two years ago. Instead, I forget how to do basic algebra, so that when my son comes to me with a question, I’m like “Uh…..Google it?” because I can’t remember how to do that kind of math anymore. Why can’t my brain make me forget the bad stuff and remember the stuff I SHOULD remember?

  44. You put such an incredible spin on ordinary things and turn them into magic. I now realize it’s all in how you look at it. Perspective is everything. Thanks for the constant inspiration, Jenny.

  45. I have a t-shirt that says “This person accepts high fives from strangers” on it. I’ve had it for a few years. When I got it, I excitedly imagined all the high fives I’d get from people. I love high fives; they’re the best thing ever and I and give/am open to receiving them at every opportunity imaginable. You know how many high fives I’ve gotten so far? About five. I’m not kidding. FIVE. Fucken….

    This just confirms for me that the world is chock full of arseholes.

  46. Back in 2000-something, I worked at a place where managers rotated getting donuts for the department once a month. I went in the breakroom to get tea one morning and saw that the donuts had arrived, but needed to be set up before the mad rush. I looked at the manager who brought all the bags of donuts, our CIO no less, and said “Hey man, need a hand?”. He was an amputee and the bags were hanging off his elbow. Way to go me. Head Desk. Murphy’s Law. Left breakroom quickly before I lost it. I returned a couple minutes later sans tea to help put out the donuts. I snicker now, because I found out he referred to himself as….”Stumpy” online.

  47. My accompishment today was that the idiot driver that I called a mother f’erread my lips and rolled down his window to yell at me and flipped me off and I blew him a kiss. Then I called him a mother f’er again as I drove away. He doesn’t even know that I won.

  48. I totally love this theory! Btw, my therapist actually recommended that one activity I could do on days I couldn’t get the energy to get out of bed was watch a tv show or a movie (or plural of either) that I had been meaning to watch, because then it is an active decision to watch TV so that’s better than mindlessly watching. I feel less crappy about spending all day binge-watching Netflix because at least that’s what I planned to do, and if I fail at that then I either was more productive than I planned or I caught up on much-needed sleep, so it’s not really a fail.

  49. Today is such a fucked-up day, I wish I had TV. But I don’t. And I don’t even have a good book I could be reading, snuggled up in bed. I can’t watch youtube videos either, because my satellite internet is an asshole who eats up all my bandwidth.
    Sigh.

  50. Well I HAD forgotten about the night at Benihana when I was showing off my awesome chopstick skills and accidentally elbowed the joystick on the power wheelchair the gentleman (stranger) was sitting next to me in, and launched him full-speed backward into the table behind us.

    Until just now. Thanks. Thanks a lot.

    This is going to take one Netflix series binge watch marathon to forget again.

  51. I tried to prank my own son but ended up pranking myself with my own gag.
    Spent a week off work with doctors orders to control my anxiety and did a marathon watch of Most Haunted (as you do when you have anxiety issues) My son jumped out of a kitchen cupboard just as the moment Lady was calling out ” Is there anybody there?” I curled up into a ball and started screaming as it was dark with lights off.
    I then proceeded to draw spiders on the toilet paper and roll it back up.
    During that same night i took the “stop thinking about work pills” in order to sleep. I did wake at 3am in need of the bathroom. I had in the process let me guards down with the medication and when i pulled the toilet paper out i saw the spiders in the faint dim lighting and again screamed the house down with my pyjama pants around my ankles i burst through the toilet door. Took what felt like minutes to realise i was the one that put them there in the first place to scare my son. Acted calm as soon as everyone woke and asked what was the matter. I said i saw a bug but killed it. I have redrawn the bugs on there and wait with baited breath. I pray i don’t get myself again.

  52. Aaaaaannndd that’s beyond my spoon limit for today! I have no more fucks to give. Not talking about you. I’m just done. Love ya!

  53. wow it helps a lot and i’m thinking i might still have time accomplishing another forget-the-high-five-thing day! i’ll go back to the tv right now!

  54. I wanted to feel bad about spending yesterday on tumblr reblogging pics of my OTP and listening to Anime Theme Songs but then I decided that since I was doing that I WASN’T smoking or doing illegal drugs so obviously I accomplished a lot!

  55. Find a mantra….I,m loved, I,m happy,I,m blessed. Repeat until bad thoughts are gone. AND believe it!

  56. I ‘block’ stressful situations and go into autopilot. I don’t do it on purpose, but, too many times people have said to me after an event with lots of people, “…you did this/that! Don’t you remember?”
    Blissfully, comfortably numb on the details.
    Good thing I stopped drinking! The memories of other people are much better now, “Wow, Really? I said/did that?”
    silent ‘Whew.’

  57. Thursday morning is my sanity saving therapy group. Today is Thursday and I am not at group. Why, you ask, caringly? I forgot it was Thursday, although I did manage to grasp that it is morning.

  58. Except now I’m sure I forgot an important moment that I meant to remember along with the one I wanted to forget. And I’m afraid to try to remember the important moment because I’ll probably remember the bad one instead of the good one. Thanks a lot TV!

  59. My medication has this interesting interaction with my dissociations. I only remember one portion of the Venn diagram that is my memory pool. I can only recall so many shame things at a time. It works and it sucks. I win either way.

  60. I’m going to take a nap. I already ate my breakfast and took all my meds, so, I’ve been productive today. That’s all the spoons I have. ciao bellas!

  61. I really believe that this is a thing. I really do. I’m currently watching Hope For Wildlife (on T.V.) and there is a terrible outbreak among the racoons. (They have (suspected) Feline Distemper!) So sad. But! One of them (deceased) totally looked like Rory, so I smiled. Then I felt horrible because these poor racoons are so, so sick. All this to say, a glimmer of happiness and hope is always helpful and makes even the worst situation tolerable – if only for a few seconds at a time.

  62. Thanks very much to Sharon and queenrobyn for your support and caring. I’m not ready to walk away, to cut things off from my end, because in my mind, I have to be prepared to really MEAN IT, even if she NEVER turns around again. And I’m not ready to tell her goodbye. Which is keeping me alive and going to therapy and taking my meds and working on my ME stuff while I do the one next thing that sucks less than crying over her. Because I hope that eventually those one next things build into a life that is worth sticking around for even if it takes her forever to come around. I was 19 with a career and my own plans all laid out in front of me when I discovered I was pregnant with her, and I still don’t regret trashing it all to be the best mom I was capable of being, all things considered. And if that’s not good enough for her right now, maybe someday it’ll be good enough for my grandchildren, even if I have to wait until they’re grown to meet them. But thank you, so much, for speaking to my pain. Today is again, a slightly better day than yesterday, I’ll take it. 🙂

  63. Brandi– # 66– I do that, and usually when I am walking. Then I become conscious of the groan and also notice that my face was contorted in a painful wince. Then I wonder if my painful expression was caught on a camera. So, basically, I triple lose. Ugh…where’s the remote?!

  64. I am working on forgetting that time in grade 7 I begged for a part in a play, because I knew I was destined for an Oscar. Then at the one and only performance I went to the bathroom after my scene and forgot to go back on for the next one. Been working really hard at purging that memory.

  65. I definitely think we can accidentally make therapeutic breakthroughs on our own!

    I had a counselling session yesterday and ended up by saying that I just wanted to go and stay with my parents for a little bit, in order to have someone to come home to, after work, that loved me. Just to have that comfort before going home and being all alone again. My counsellor said that yes, we all needed to just retreat and lick our wounds sometimes and that I should probably do that if I could.

    I’m pretty sure i’m counsellling myself at this point! Like Alice said “I give myself very good advice but I very seldom follow it”. My counsellor is literally just telling me to take my own advice haha! Good to know that when I can’t afford to pay for my sessions anymore I’ll already have my own trained counsellor inside my head 😛

  66. TV isn’t so bad – you could always claim that you are simply watching it for creative inspiration.

    I hate when I suddenly remember something kind of stupid that I did years ago. But I completely get your point! Thinking that I may have forgotten one of my not-so-bright moments that once haunted me is such a great relief. Thanks a lot for that!

  67. Thank you Jen! I’ve been feeling down today, and you just made me laugh hysterically. I needed it. You rock, but of course, you knew that already 🙂

  68. Great idea!!…..except now I’m thinking about that horrible moment I’d rather not think about hoping the moment you’ve forgotten is equally disturbing…. and now I’ve probably reminded you that you have disturbing moments that need to be forgotten… and now I feel bad that I undid all your work of forgetting them…

  69. I didn’t get much done today thanks to anxiety brought on by a teacher posting a due date wrong. I did not find out that everything was OK until near six o’clock. I did accomplish three things though so it’s fine. I’ll live.

  70. True Story time! So I was once working a booth at a beer fest and we were giving out koozies. This guy and his girlfriend walk over to talk to us. The guy had his arm around his girlfriend and a beer in his other hand. I gave his girlfriend a koozie and went to hand him one. He wouldn’t remove his arm from around his girlfriend to get it!! So I kind of shook it at him to tell him to take it and he awkwardly did with a finger from his beer hand. He also leaned forward to do so and that’s when I realized he only had one arm.

    Anyway,I can laugh about it now. Just not with him. I’d totally high five you of I saw you in person!

  71. I frequently do this when my mind is in overdrive. Having to focus on something other than the bad thoughts….BUT, these days, whatever I watch on TV, inevitably sends me spiraling down some other broken path. That s why sitcom’s were created! High five to all and to all a good nights rest!

  72. Recently, I have been reading an article by a Journalist. She has become one of the popular Journalists and interviewed in white house as well. But she says, what’s now? Probably she was not happy from her accomplishments. Someone has rightly said that happiness will never come to those who don’t appreciate what they already have. So think about what you have, be happy for it and you will accomplish the most important thing of your life, i.e., happiness.

  73. I only have one hand. As long as I’m not actively holding something in it, if you (or anyone) gave me a high five, of COURSE I would get you back. He was an asshole. Let it go. Honestly – I am embarrassed for my kind right now.

  74. Some days my to do list is:
    Wake up
    Sleep
    Breathe
    Do not kill anyone
    Do not hurt anyone on purpose
    Maybe eat something
    Visit the bathroom as necessary
    Repeat each item as appropriate
    (not necessarily in that order)
    So basically, you managed to add to the list by watching TV. Also, TV makes great therapy when characters have something going on that’s close to life, or when the doctor saves everyone and everything or gives a lecture about how not to be a bad person.

  75. That one time I asked a woman at a photoshoot to uncurl her fingers – only to discover she was missing the top half of them all. Felt like an ass. Then later thought: wish I’d had the balls to say “oh – nevermind then :)” instead of ignoring the obvious. And then I watched TV 🙂

  76. Nice to be able to go to bed or read or watch tv all day then post about it. Some of us have to get up and keep going to pay the bills.

  77. Had knee surgery; have been camped out on the couch for a couple of days now watching daytime TV (gah!!) and attempting to get to those “projects I always said I’d do when I had the time.” Oh sure. At least I have pain meds; they’re wonderful. Either I’ll forget everything or they’ll open up my pea brain of goofy memories. We’ll see

  78. Y’all need to write about shopping because that shit is too hard as a woman and impossible as a man.

  79. So when a 26 year marriage is going down the tubes and you wonder why sticking around for anything that seems worthy of nothing (except my men sons) where is that in worth of a Netflix binge? I say FTW right now! Meds included. Life just sucks SO HARD most of the time right now! You probably won’t even see this and I’m just rambling on a keyboard. Too many shitty thoughts too be worthy.

  80. Hey, if not being completely crushed by embarrassment, paranoia, and despair is an accomplishment, then I am one of the more accomplished people around.

    Trying not to think about any of that consumes a good deal of my time.

    Speaking of which, let me turn the volume up on both my television and music now…

  81. In second grade I was in the cafeteria at lunchtime and I leaned over to whisper something in my friend’s ear, but then I forgot what I was going to say, and in my panic I kissed her cheek. She made a big deal out of it, and I feel embarrassed about it to this day. It’s nice to think that there are other embarrassing things that I don’t remember!

  82. Just had my children assessed for Brain Balance (a very expensive and supposedly highly successful program for ADD, ADHD, dyslexia, behavioral issues, etc. Likely someone is sitting on the beach drinking maitais off our sucker-ed up wallets, but I digress.) I realized that I probably have a very imbalanced brain, and I get maybe 1/4 done in the day compared to my amazing friends. Depressing. Blogs like this, even, make me feel under accomplished!

  83. I have always secretly wished I could have that amnesia that doesn’t make you forget how to count and read but that the rest of my life was just gone. Nothing holding me back. I often wonder who I would be then? I think I would like that me better.

  84. Firefly therapy. 🙂 It’s what I can do right now. River Tam: You’re not crazy. You’re badassery in the making.

  85. This makes no sense and perfect sense all at the same time. I will remember this the next time I procrastinate everything on my to-do list…which could be today.

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