I’ve been a bit off-center (more so than usual) for the past few days and I’m not sure if it’s because of the moon or the world or my brain chemicals but I do know that even people I know who don’t deal with mental illness are feeling weird right now and people I know with mental illness seem to be (like me) manic or depressed or filled with dread and anxiety and want to rip their skin off.
That is very depressing but it’s also comforting because seeing that so many of us are in this low place is a good reminder that the wave will rise again and we will rise with it. It’s a reminder that not all of the emotions we may be feeling right now are real even if they feel real. It’s a warning to those of us who may do stupid things when we feel desperate. It’s a comfort to those who have to deal with us who can assure themselves that we’ll be back to normal soon and that they are saints for dealing with our crazy. It’s a chance to practice ignoring the lies that your brain tells.
And it’s an opportunity to celebrate the lovely things that help you cope during times like these. In the comments tell me the things that pull you out of the dark…whether they’re tools or quotes or books or routines. Just share one. And then find one in the comments and go do that thing.
Here’s my pulls-me-out-of-the-darkness thing for today:
There are a million of them so you can find the ones that speak to you but personally I like the ones that tell me a story. Especially if it’s a true story that takes me out of my head. When my brain is so broken I can’t concentrate on even reading it’s like someone is reading to me. And if I can do nothing else I can listen to one with Hailey or be distracted by it until I’m myself again.
Here’s a list of a few of my favorites:
Unhappy Hour with Matt Bellassai
My Favorite Murder
Dear Hank and John
Every Little Thing
Someone Knows Something
The Hilarious World of Depression
This American Life
This is actually happening (This one is fascinating but I can’t listen to when I’m in a dark place, so trigger warning)
Done Disappeared (If you listen to true crime podcasts it’s fantastic)
Inside The Exorcist
Secrets (from Radiotopia)
Love + Radio
Mission to Zyxx
Welcome to NightVale
My Dad Wrote a Porno
If my head was working properly I’d link to all of these but if you look them up you’ll find them.
PS. I don’t have a graphic for this so instead please accept this video of a bat that is SHOCKINGLY adorable.