I shouldn’t be allowed to text.

A few minutes ago a reminder popped up on my phone from my family calendar to remind me that it’s my dad’s birthday and then a text message popped up from Hailey (because she gets the same notifications) and she was like, “IT’S DADDY’S BIRTHDAY!” and I was like, “No, it’s *my* daddy’s birthday.  Your daddy’s birthday was last month” and then she was like, “Um.  What.  I’m pretty sure we have the same father?” and turns out it was my sister texting me and now for my father’s birthday he gets to reassure my sister that she’s not adopted.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DADDY!

 

71 replies. read them below or add one

  1. 2
    Christy Oslund

    Well done! Never hurts to sow the seeds of doubt with younger siblings.

    Liked by 9 people

  2. Thanks for making me laugh! Happy Birthday to “your” dad!

    Like

  3. We have spent 40 years telling a younger cousin that he’s adopted and wishing him “Happy Adoption Day” rather than “Happy Birthday”. It’s gone on so long that I half believe it even though I remember when his Mom was pregnant. Family!

    Liked by 5 people

  4. Haha, why does this conversation sound so familiar? Maybe none of us should be allowed to text!

    Like

    Juan recently posted Rain, Rain, Go Away, Come Again Another Day.

  5. Happy birthday Jenny’s Dad. What a wonderful daughter he has.

    Like

    Gary recently posted Eating out in Geneva.

  6. Lol, my dad called me twice the other day, but knowing him they were butt dials. I still haven’t called him back. I’m an awful daughter.

    Like

  7. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    🤔

    😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    Like

  8. Thanks for making me laugh. Happy birthday to your dad.

    Like

  9. This made my night. I have bronchitis and just laughed so hard I was gasping and coughing. Worth it. I hope YOUR father has a happy birthday. Maybe a 23andMe kit for your sisters birthday? Might be nice since she just found out you don’t share a father 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

    knockingonfortysdoor recently posted Bag of Hair Blues….

  10. 13
    Sally Baldwin

    I received my shirt today and I’m so excited! Also, you sent me a book plate which I immediately placed in my “Furiously Happy.” Thank you SO much!

    Like

  11. 14
    Heather Fairfield

    Ancestry DNA kits all around!! 😂😂😂😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I had to read this twice because it’s so awesome! I’m also a mostly only child (I have brothers but we didn’t grow up together) and I wish I were this close to them.

    Like

  13. My sister told me for years that I was adopted, only blonde in the family! Our dad had blonde hair when he was young, so no I was not adopted. Big sisters like to stir up shit.

    Like

  14. There’s only one way to settle this. You all have to go on Maury.

    Liked by 2 people

    romcomdojo recently posted When Johnny Met Maggie…And Threw Trash at Her Face.

  15. In our family photo album we have photos of a family trip to the Oklahoma City zoo. I was the youngest at that point and my mom was eight months pregnant and it showed!

    The next section in the family photo album are my baby brother’s photos, when he was first brought home after my mom gave birth.

    For YEARS my older brother and I had my baby brother convinced that he was part monkey and that we adopted him from the zoo, using the photo album as proof. This, of course, was before any of the three of us actually understood how childbirth happened, so my baby brother just thought every mom got “fat” before adopting a baby animal from the zoo.

    Liked by 2 people

  16. That made me laugh-cry!

    Like

  17. Why is your sister pretending to be your daughter? It’s her fault! Happy birthday to Papa. Maybe it should be Happy Furrday for him. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  18. I wish I had a sister like you, Jenny!

    Like

  19. I’m laughing so hard at this!!!

    Like

  20. Its my daddy’s birthday today too! I lost him 9 years ago but still mark this day. Happy birthday Jenny’s daddy!

    Like

  21. Youngest of five siblings. Only one to inherit Daddy’s blond hair (well, when he had hair. Yeah, I heard, “I can’t help it if you were adopted” a lot. Yours was by accident; my brother’s, not at all.

    Like

  22. Why won’t my link back to my last blog post?

    Like

  23. At least Lisa knows to take your texts only half-seriously. That’s too funny!

    Happy birthday to Jenny’s AND Lisa’s daddy!!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Nothing like planting a little doubt. I once got a new phone. Forwarded a text to my friend from a lady I worked for. Made fun of said lady in the text to my friend. Realized moments later that my new phone did forwarding weird and the making-fun-of-crazy lady text was sent straight back to crazy lady instead of my friend. Ouch.

    Like

  25. the harsh thing is you didn’t even remind her of her real father’s birthday last month!

    Like

    But That's For Another Blog recently posted Just when ya think you’re the most awkward person in the world, your co-worker steps up and takes the crazy crown..

  26. LOL
    One time my mom sent me an unsigned text from an unknown number to tell me she got a new number. I said “who is this” and she replied: “How can you not recognize your OWN MOTHER???”

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Older kid to younger kid: You know…you’re adopted
    Younger kid: I AM NOT (runs to parents…) Am I adopted?
    Mom: No. I gave birth to you. I know this because I was there.
    Younger kid back to older kid: Mom says I’m NOT adopted!
    Older kid (calmly): She just said that because she feels sorry for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. 33
    A Nony Mouse

    Gotta keep those younger siblings guessing. It’s the privilege of the oldest to torture the younger siblings (guess which one I am :-D).

    Like

  29. Texting may be the great equalizer. It makes fools of us all.

    Like

    Joannie Penderwick recently posted How Not to Fantasize About Sex With Rock Stars.

  30. 😍

    Like

  31. 37
    Just Another Sarah

    My dad and his older sister terrorized each other growing up. One of her favorite things to tell him was that he was adopted. He would go crying to my grandmother who would assure him that he was not adopted. My dad would then go back to his sister and say he wasn’t adopted, to which his sister would respond, “Don’t you understand? I’m the only one who loves you enough to tell you the truth.” Just cruel.
    Now, of course, they love each other dearly and she is my favorite aunt. But man, they were pretty vicious to each other!

    Like

  32. did your parents start to call you by your sibling’s name, then stop & continue with your name? this is payback…

    Like

  33. OMG hilarious! I love how so many of us can relate to you and your stories

    Like

  34. In my case, my sister, who is five years older than I am, was convinced SHE was adopted. She knew I wasn’t because she saw me in the hospital when I was born. 🙂

    Like

    samatwitch recently posted National Pet Day.

  35. Why am I not laughing at this?
    broken

    Like

  36. … so why would SHE be the adopted one?

    Like

  37. … so why would SHE be the adopted one, exactly?

    Like

  38. If only I had been “adopted…”

    Like

  39. ROFLMAO

    I used to be the one who got teased about being adopted because I look nothing like my bio-dad (Mom’s 1st husband), my sister (who has the same father), my half-brother (who has a different father) or my mom. I used to get people asking me if I was my Hispanic stepfather’s kid from a previous marriage (he was married 3X before Mom with 6 other kids from those marriages, so it was a legit question). It was like playing “What’s wrong with this picture?” because there was Stepdad (tall, darkly olive skin, wavy dark hair), Mom (medium height, long auburn hair, fair skin, blue eyes), Sis (copycat of mom, but more of a strawberry/dirty blonde) and Bro (male copy of my sister, but even more strawberry blonde). And then me…not quite fair like my mom and siblings, but not quite darkly olive like my stepfather but with long dark brown hair that was somewhere between “chocolate” and “mouse turds” in color (still is).

    Like

  40. Possessing both the looks of my dad’s side of the family and the personality from my mother’s there is no way I could be convinced I was adopted.

    Happy birthday, Jenny’s Dad!

    Like

  41. 47
    lattesdotter

    My sister used to wish she was adopted. But she and I look similar, and like our mother, so she’s out of luck. Happy Birthday to your father (and aparently your sister’s father as well. Maybe).

    Like

  42. You are always good for a chuckle… And much more.

    Like

  43. Jenny I just received my shirt and my book plate. I love them both! If I lived in Texas,I’d be in NOWHERE all the time! Happy Birthday to your Dad! He has an AMAZING daughter! My cat called my friend the other day! I had texted him,went into the kitchen and came back to my phone ringing!

    Like

  44. 50
    Kimberly Collins

    Hahahahaha!!

    Like

  45. I have a salt and pepper set of girls (one dark, one light) and since they are almost 5 years apart, people always ask if they have the same father (like it’s any of their business, really!)….Nope, both from the same parents. Aren’t gene pools amazing?

    Like

  46. 52
    get_christie_love

    Did anyone actually call the poor guy once it was sorted? Lol

    Like

  47. Real siblings gift each other with existential dread.

    Like

    Wolf of Words recently posted The Deaths of Ian Stone (2008).

  48. 54
    Lizabeth White

    Got my shirt today!! Wearing it to the Texas Book Festival to say ha! I’m the captain now!

    Like

  49. 55
    Kim Jones-Stein

    See…even amongst chaos there is still room for laughter! Thank you! Happy Birthday to your Dad!
    Do you love the smell of cardboard as much as I do? Especially when the outdoor “fort” is left to absorb the dew overnight! Then the structure gets all pliable and squishy so now it’s become a tunnel! Awesome! Loving the childhood flashback, honored to be able to still enjoy. Smiling with you and all involved with Nowhere!!!

    Like

  50. I laughed too hard. 😂

    Like

  51. 57
    The Other Jenny

    Happy Birthday to your Daddy! You make me lololololol

    Like

  52. After giving notice to my old boss and finding out that he was closing down the business, I texted a good friend to begin to tell her how crazy the place had gotten. It all involved a tutor dating a student, a mini sweater dress that was so tight it outlined her thong, hanging bra straps, and how nobody was willing to clean the toilet. This is what I texted:

    Something here is in fu<l<ing retrograde.

    The only problem was that I accidentally sent this text to my new boss instead. How I still have a new job, I’m not certain.

    I think your sister will understand when you text her to say that something here is in fu<l<ing retrograde.

    Like

  53. 59
    Heather Feather

    My Mother is a brunette with hazel eyes and easily tanned (olive-ish) skin, her three kids are blond with easily burned (pale pinky-white skin) with two with blue eyes and one with mostly green/somewhat hazel eyes. My dad was out of the picture early on, so I’m pretty sure everyone assumed she was the babysitter or we were adopted. My father’s sister looked like us kids, so when she was visiting (often,) people figured she was our mom. My Mom often gets confused about who is texting/emailing her because she named me after her sister, and one of my brothers after one of her brothers, and she was named after her aunt, and her other brother was named after her dad, who also had the same name as my stepfather. Confusion only gets better with age and technology….

    Like

  54. Fyi
    Love my grey Vneck shirt! I ordered a large for a roomy slouchy, Sunday morning fit… but it fits like a medium, so I would order a size up from your normal size ❤

    Like

  55. Comical!

    Like

    Donna Lucas recently posted What the FAFSA Comes Next?.

  56. So wait. You named your daughter Hailey after your sister Hailey?

    (No, I just didn’t read who the text was from when it popped up. ~ Jenny)

    Like

  57. If your sister were adopted, the two of you would have the same father. And be truly sisters. That’s the beauty of adoption. ❤️ (P.S. I know what you meant. 🤗)

    Like

  58. Thank you, needed the laugh tonight ❤️

    Like

  59. Yeah… be careful w that. It’s part of the reason y sister disowned me.

    Like

  60. At least you’re not Faye Dunaway as Mrs. Mulray in Chinatown: “She’s my sister!” SLAP “She’s my daughter!” SLAP “She’s my sister AND my daughter!”
    Eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwww

    Like

  61. LOL! Too funny.On the plus side, your dad gets to have a meaningful conversation with one of his daughters. That’s a good thing, right?

    Like

    Lisa Orchard recently posted Stress Relievers for Every-day Life.

  62. My mind went to the old milkman/mailman theory and I was momentarily impressed that you knew the identity of your sister’s bio dad AND his birthday. Who knows their childhood mailman well enough that they know his birthday? DANG.

    Like

  63. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! My sister would totally do this to me.

    Like

  64. hahhahahha thats kraizy!!

    Like

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