Let me entertain you in the laziest way possible.

I don’t like to talk on the phone but I’m lonely so suddenly I am talking on the phone and the people I call are like, “I can’t believe you’re calling me.  You hate the phone.”  And I’m like, “I can’t believe you answered.  You hate the phone.” And then we agree that the world is weird and realize that we don’t really have anything to talk about because every day is groundhog day so instead I’ve started just sending people random instagram posts because this is my new love language.

So today I thought maybe you’d like to be on the receiving end what it’s like to get a series of texts from me that are all just weird instagrams and memes.

ENJOY!

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Welcome to real lfe VR

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I see no problem here

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how to summon a lemon

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Victor and I have been working on this one. So far we’ve figured out 14 of them:

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How didn’t she notice is my question ❄️

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Cat not playing 😂 ( via: @authentically__ewe )

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The wiggles kinda slapped though

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😂😂 Caption this!☺️ 🙋Tag a friend 🤗 ———————————————— Follow @wild_animalsgram for more 👍 ———————————————— 📸from  @raccoons_mark.nusha ———————————————— #raccoon  #conservation #wildliferehab #wildlifephotography #global4nature #wildlife_inspired #animalsofinstagram #wildlifeconservation #wildlifeartist #wildlifeofaustralia #animals #africa #animalpolis #wildlifeowners #wildlife_perfection #animalsaddict #wildlifeonearth #igswildlife #wildlife #wildlifetrust #wildlifephotos #wildlifeprotection #ig_africa #majestic_wildlife_ #wildliferefuge #wildlife_supreme #naturephotography #igs_africa #wildlifeplanet #wildlifesafari

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Is this the laziest post ever? Probably. But it still made me smile. I hope it made you smile too.

98 replies. read them below or add one

  1. The last time I used a telephone this often was when I was a teenager.

    Gary recently posted Prepper meal All tinned Nothing fresh.

  2. Brilliant! Thank you for normalizing what goes on in my head these days!

  3. Oh my gosh, I almost peed while watching the cat saying hello video. Holy crap. It makes every annoying thing that’s happened today worth living through for the joy of that video.

  4. This is amazing! Thank you for sharing!!

  5. I don’t understand the coloured blocks thing at all. I iz old!

  6. Lazy? Idc, I love it!!!

  7. I’ve had a bad morning so far, and this made my whole day. I keep watching the little grey cat who can’t jump and giggling uncontrollably. Thanks for this, Jenny.

    Jess recently posted Not Pretending.

  8. This was the best entertainment I’ve had today. Thank you. <3

  9. Yeah, go figure my job as a stay at home mom, now kindergarten tutor, has terminated my side job as family photographer to make room for all the memes and animated animal gifs that keep my sanity barely afloat.

    Cheers Bloggess Goddess!
    (^ – ^)

  10. Jenny, I needed this SO BADLY. I literally just laughed so hard I cried at the cat forgetting how to cat trying to jump on the counter. THANK YOU <3

  11. Oh this sooo made my day. I don’t do any social media so thank you for sorting through all the bullshit for me and giving me the opportunity to see the cream of the crop!

  12. 12
    Heather Radecky

    Oh my gosh I laughed!!! I can still laugh! The cat having to clean up the mess made me howl so loud my husband’s conference call was interrupted! 👍Totally worth it! Keep talking to us Jenny. We love you!

  13. I would never tire of getting text messages from you. Those are the best things I’ve seen in a long time.

  14. 14
    Just Another Sarah

    I just interrupted my wife’s online meeting because I was crying laughing. Whoops!

  15. I love you one million. This post made me laugh out loud multiple times. Thank you.

  16. Thank you. I needed that.

  17. I would never tire of getting text messages from you – those are the best things I’ve seen in a while

  18. This is great! My best friend and I used to just send a steady stream of daily odd compliments (https://www.google.com/amp/s/dailyoddcompliment.tumblr.com/post/100199470558/amp) back and forth to each other and crack up but never actually say a word. We may have done this several times while actually sitting next to each other on the couch as well.
    Also, my friend (who was a co-worker at the time as well) and I would find a bunch of hilarious memes and just email them to each other all day with subjects like “I need those recs stat” or “good meeting today” or “meeting minutes.”
    Here’s to finding ways to say, “Hey, I miss you. I’m here for you. I think you’re awesome.” Without ever having to actually say a word!

  19. omg. thank you. I have now been sitting at my desk sniggering like a maniac for the last 5 minutes. I work child support, so… i really needed that

  20. All the laughs are greatly appreciated.

  21. Congratulations Jenny. You just completely hi-jacked my afternoon.

  22. I needed this today after another round of trying to keep my destructo children out of the ER! Speaking of the ER- we could not attempt the color square/Sponge Bob picture, it would wind up on the ever-growing list of things we fight about during a pandemic in this house. I’m definitely at the pick up the phone and start cold calling people or give myself a DIY undercut point of this experience.

    knockingonfortysdoor recently posted Remember- Teachers are dealing with the alligator closest to the boat right now..

  23. Ok so I literally just shared almost all of these with my friends so we all thank you. Also I too do not get that block thing. And that no kids one was scarily on point. I feel seen.

  24. Thanks I needed that today’s ruff but that helped

  25. Thank you so much for the giggles!!

  26. 26
    Stacey Gudelis Anderson

    The two black cats broke my brain. Thank you 😊

  27. Loved it! I sent half of them to people I know : )

  28. This was amazing. Thank you so much!

  29. 29
    Doug in Oakland

  30. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! I needed that laugh SO badly! That first one had me in tears!

  31. 31
    celesteepstein561

    Fabulous collection, Jenny! But I really need someone to ‘splain the colored blocks thing. Clueless!!

  32. We definitely had a laugh. Thank you for this!

  33. The blocks represent pop culture characters. I can’t figure who the blocks are. But someone said #7 is Alvin & the Chipmunks. Brown heads and each one always wore a specific color. Probably Scooby Doo crew is another.

  34. Thank you! many smiles and giggle had 🙂

  35. Day. F’in. Made.

    Thank you Jenny!

  36. 36
    Karen Jones

    THANK YOU!

  37. Exactly what I needed in this weird, strange time. <3

  38. It wasn’t lazy if you had to collect all that hilarious nonsense. I cried at the cat fart one. The elk noise reminds me of when I turned the sound for Pokémon Go and was like “that is NOT the noises those creatures should make!” https://possumscatsthingsgnawingatme.wordpress.com/2020/04/09/stay-at-home-highlight/

  39. Jenny, you are a goddamn national treasure. Thank you for the best laugh I’ve had in weeks!

  40. Thanks, I needed a laugh. I really, really did.

    pollymorse recently posted Welcome to the world according to Suki….

  41. I am admitting I watched all of them and I am NOT sorry.

  42. Jenny, this was seriously the happiest post I have seen in many years! Please do not think this means I don’t love all of your posts, because I do. It’s just that I needed this today.

  43. I haven’t laughed this hard or this long in ages!!! Thank you sooooo much!

    mariner2mother recently posted Covid 19 Check-In.

  44. That was an utter delight! Thank you.

  45. Such fun Jenny! Thanks for sharing

  46. Thanks for the laughs…we need them more than ever right now.

    mommatrek recently posted Quarantine Day 26–There are times to party. This is not one of them..

  47. Pee my pants laughing. THANK YOU

  48. 49
    Auntie Meme

    OMG I laughed so hard and loudly that my husband probably thought the gin and popsicles hit super fast…but no, they were just hilarious. THANK YOU

  49. The well-meaning dog that ripped the door didn’t deserve that. LOL Thank you so much for this!

  50. 51
    Amanda Frazier

    #3 is Shrek. # 17 is Ninja Turtles #14 is Winnie the Pooh #21 is Scooby Doo.

  51. That llama tho…

  52. I cannot love this post enough!!!

  53. I don’t even know if my phone has a ringtone, I HATE talking on it.

  54. I needed this in ways I can’t express. Please do this again. I need you curate my whimsy for me. Thank you!

  55. Those were great! Thank you,and it isn’t laziness. Its tired creativity

  56. 57
    Kimberlee Jones

    Thanks to you once again Jenny! These clips were great. After posting this I’m going to go back and watch a 3rd time……….yep. Perhaps even a fifth–I mean fourth. Not talking booze. Maybe. Hope Lisa is continuing to get better day after night after day, etc. You’re needed…. thanks for being here, smiles and grins to you.

  57. Anytime I call my friends, they assume I’m on prednisone.

  58. Thank you Jenny!!!

  59. These were all pure gold!! And I usually done ever watch videos people post. I am SO glad I did

    Kim
    Rebel0468@gmail.com

  60. Thank you. I hope you realize your family photo is priceless.

  61. Thank you, Jenny! I bust a gut, man, my husband just hollered from downstairs, “are you okay? Are you laughing or crying?” Excellent work, ma’am. Most excellent indeed. 😉

  62. 63
    Katie White

    Thank you for letting me know that telephone anxiety is a real thing. I hate being on the phone, I especially hate having to initiate a phone call.

  63. The colored block thing— I think #9 is Wall-E and Eva , and #19 is Iron Man and the Hulk.

  64. I loved this! Laughed out loud several times. The cool thing is that I’m not on social media and would never search these out and now I got to enjoy them anyway. Thanks Jenny! I was well entertained.

  65. Gold

  66. That “How to Summon a Demon” cartoon NEVER fails to make me laugh. I have a copy of it stuck on the wall of my cubicle at work and I post it to every training class I give.
    “Man, I hate cursive.”

  67. I laughed so hard! Thank you so much!

  68. Made me smile for the first time today

  69. I laughed so much, thank you Jenny!

  70. Thank you! Just what I needed to start the day ❤️

  71. i hate talking on the phone too, i will do anything not to answer a call, and god forbid i should call you, but times are tough, and we are doing things that are out of character for sure. thanks for sharing these!

  72. […] via Let me entertain you in the laziest way possible. — The Bloggess […]

  73. I’ve been properly entertained. Thank you.

  74. I was just watching a murder mystery (Death in Paradise), and a friend and her daughter called me just as we got to the denouement. Then I watched the next crime show (set in the Netherlands), and my brother called me just as they identified the killer. I watch about 2 hours of TV a week… WE ARE OVERDOING THE CONNECTEDNESS!
    But those vids and cartoons etc were lovely and brightened my never knowing quite what happened!

  75. Those people with the cat that couldn’t jump on the counter TOTALLY sprayed their wood floor with Endust. I used dusting spray on my wood floor once and for a month, anyone who walked on it in their socks fell flat on their arse. Instantly. No recovery time whatsoever. BOOM.

    Marcheline recently posted Speaking of flowers....

  76. I literally laughed out loud to nearly all of these. I live alone so no one gave me looks like I was a few marbles short, but I’m pretty sure the neighbors heard me saying adjectives in the wrong order out loud….

  77. 78
    Claire Knowles

    I love this!

  78. 79
    Vicki Henke

    They were all good but my favorite was the “free shrugs”

  79. I hate the phone!!! I love this collection and laughed harder than I have for a while..thank you for being a lifesaver..book club and You Are Here book have been company for me.

  80. 81
    Heather Feather

    I laughed so hard I cried and I couldn’t breath! (My husband told me to calm down.) Thank you from the bottom of my heart! I don’t do social media, so I really appreciate your curated posts. Laughter makes the world go round…..

  81. I’d appreciate the creativity and ingenuity of this community. My daughter turns 21 on May 3. We were supposed to spend the weekend in New Orleans at Jazz Fest with her favorite artists and new-found “adulthood.” (I treasure Jazz Fest for not making Stevie Nicks, Lizzo, and others come out.)

    Any ideas for a memorable stay-at-home celebration? I ordered some Cafe Du Monde chickory coffee and am looking into Beignet, daiquiri, and jambalaya recipes, but ingredients are hard to come by.

  82. These were awesome to watch and a much needed diversion! Thank you Jenny for being you and sharing with us!

  83. 84
    Jessica Johannesen

    this was amazing. i needed a laugh.

  84. That was awesome! I think if I had said “look at this” one more time to my husband, he might have divorced me 😂

  85. The dog with the slow-eating bowl is a bull terrier. They are the gifted children in the dog world; they know they’re smart, but don’t want you to know they’re smart. Mine gets stuck in the bathtub.

  86. Thank you for the laughs! Social media is a weird, and fabulous place.

    Sammi Sidetracked recently posted S-A-F-E-T-Y Safety Mask.

  87. And it only took until the Amazon package delivery post for me to figure out who the fuck Carole is… but still no interest in watching that show. (I tend to be 5-7 years behind pop culture on TV programs).

  88. The cat walking in slippers is by far my favorite. Or maybe it’s the penguin weight check (in the comments). Or possibly the raccoon drinking water out of a glass. Can’t decide. They all make me smile. Thank you for this!

  89. Thanks Jenny! Hilarious and ridiculous! I can’t get enough of that right now.

  90. I bought those puzzle dishes for my labradors. They still managed to wolf their food, but wow am I lucky they didn’t figure out how to flip them.

    Thanks Jenny, needed a laugh and these certainly fit the bill (particularly the lemon).

  91. That billboard with the error display just proves we are all in the matrix!

    Bathwater recently posted Updates.

  92. You just turned into my mom. She sends me these things all day. Thanks to you I was able to send a couple back she hadn’t seen. 🤣

  93. 94
    bingamahjig

    Thank you for this. I truly needed it. <3

  94. omg i laughed so hard THANK YOU <3

  95. Bahahaha the identical cat one… what I took from it is how I’m going to go out and start bringing cats home. It’s Monday.

    epilepstaticergmailcom recently posted Getting Creative with Quarantine Activities.

  96. Can you just filter my Instagram feed from now on? That was perfect!

  97. […] Bloggess likes Instagram as much as I […]

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